125 | Your Avoidance Isn’t Protecting You

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You know that feeling when you'd rather do anything except log into your bank account? Or when you tell yourself you'll deal with the taxes later, because later feels so much easier than now?

Here's something that might catch you on guard: that avoidance isn't protecting you at all.

Your nervous system learned somewhere along the way that money feels unsafe. So it built a wall to keep you from going there. But that wall is actually the thing keeping you stuck in the same cycle, over and over.

In this episode...

🧬 Why avoiding your money doesn't make you lazy or bad at it – it's actually your nervous system trying to protect you

🗝️ The one thing mantras, affirmations, and good intentions can never do for your money story

💔 The surprising parallel between how you handle money and how you show up in your closest relationships

🔥 The real path out of the avoidance cycle – and why it doesn't require perfection

🚀 A five-day shift that's already helped over 1,500 people build a new relationship with their money

By the end of this drop, you'll understand exactly why you've been avoiding what you've been avoiding, and why that's not a character flaw. You'll walk away with a clear next step to start building trust with your money instead of dreading it.

🎙️ Brought to you by Lauren Poppins Raye – your abundance astrologer and systems witch

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Connect with Lauren on Instagram: @laurenpoppinsraye

Transcript

0:58

Avoiding your money isn't protecting you. And I know, of course, logically to hear this, you're like, "Well, yeah, duh." But the thing is, so many people have something unconscious running under this assumption and need to take a moment to unpack this with love. So this is what we're getting into today Avoiding your money isn't protecting you. Why is this something that is so important for me to scream from the digital rooftops based on all of the work that I've done helping so many, what I'm now calling soul-employed people and seen firsthand the problem that this is. The way it goes down, which I can tell you with authority based on having, again, seen it so many times with clients, especially when I was a tax preparer, but also during that season and era of my life, playing it out myself too It seems all too easy to avoid it. And the reason the call-out is that your avoidance isn't protecting you when it comes to money is because likely in some way, shape, or form, if you find yourself regularly avoiding the money stuff and getting caught in that cycle, it's happening because your nervous system is protecting you from times that you've leaned in, faced it, and felt unsafe relative to it, incompetent relative to it, and all the feelings that come with that, straight up panicked and in survival mode because of it And so is it any surprise that after having so many experiences that just cut you down a notch, you don't wanna go back there, right? And sure, if you actually thought about it, which you often don't do unless you have to because of said avoidance, your logical mind would tell you, "Come on, this is not unsafe. This is not going to be a repeat of last time, and you're not doing yourself any favors by avoiding and letting stuff pile up because of that avoidance", right? Like, your logical brain knows this. But what actually happens is you just don't go there unless you have to and then it ends up feeding that cycle where because you've avoided it, because it's piled up, it ends up being a nightmare when you do lean in, right? And so then, oh, of course, you know, whether you're thinking about it consciously or not, you're like, "Well, that's why I don't go there. This is always such a pain in my ass Now, I've also been on the other side, both for myself now, as well as the people that I now serve, helping them get to the other side where they're not avoiding it anymore, and they've done the hard thing instead of choosing the easy button of actually leaning in, looking, and getting to that other side where it does become simple, where they are able to have corrective experiences to start to build up the proof and evidence that it's not just going to be the same way that you've experienced it before, to develop the, the trust that comes from showing yourself that you've got yourself when it comes to the money stuff. And you can't do that through mantras or affirmations or even the best of intentions in whatever form that's taken for you. The only way to do that, to walk that path, to get to the other side, is to take new actions, to actually start showing up for your money differently. And if you've been in my world for any amount of time, you know that my favorite metaphor that really is spot on is the attachment theory that we experience in intimate relating, in our human relationships. Something similar is likely playing out for you in your relationship with money. For myself, the way this used to play out is I thought that I was somehow, you know, exempt from needing to look at and deal with the patterns that were playing out for me with my money, the unconscious stories that were keeping them in place, that were keeping my experience with money the same, which for me was, as a tax preparer, I always knew that there was a tax season windfall around the corner so because of that, I didn't set money aside for taxes. I didn't have a regular practice in place because I didn't think I needed to because I knew the money would come in when the money was due And I racked up credit cards until it did, and that was what was normalized for me. When I actually took the time to look at it, did it feel good? No. It felt like I sucked at money, but it worked, and so I just kept feeding it by looking away, by not looking right at it. I just kept that pattern repeating itself But the thing is, doing money that way meant I couldn't build a future. I couldn't really be intentional about what I was creating. At the time, I was single, and I can tell you now on the other side, being a wife and a mom, it wasn't gonna work if I wasn't, right? Like, I was gonna have to change my ways to be able to be a functional part of a family. Not to mention I was a bit of a hypocrite teaching people to be better with money when I was not proud at all myself of how I was being with it And I know I probably just sound like a marketer to wrap it all up in the simplest bow and say that all I had to do was actually look at it, and showing up for it differently became obvious. The way out of the pattern that I was repeating lit up for me once I was actually willing to look at and be honest about what I was doing to perpetuate what wasn't working And now the way I am with it, what I'm building, like it all feels good. I mean, it's not to say that, you know, I'm rolling in it by any means. I'm still making my way into establishing this new way, this other side. But every action that I take, every moment that I show up for it intentionally, eyes wide open, consciously, just feels right. And this is why so much of my work is not about how much you make, though that often improves too on this path. It's more about how you feel about your relationship with it, because that's what determines whether you're gonna keep showing up, right? Same as in an intimate relationship. You're gonna lean in and keep showing up if the relationship is secure, if it feels like it's supporting you, and if you're committed to it in the way that I wanna support you to be with your money And back to the topic of this episode, being avoidant with your money isn't any of the things you might have judged yourself around it it doesn't mean that you're bad at it. Most people were never taught how to be another way with it Enter the treasure trove of conspiracy theories around how the controllers wanna keep us down It's not laziness, 'cause again, what you need to do to show up for it well isn't actually hard to do And it doesn't mean that you're doomed in any way. It is shiftable. It is changeable. I've done it and I've seen it happen for so many people not unlike you. It's protection. It's literally just wired protection that is going to keep operating that way until you decide to lean in, in a safe space to create safety for yourself around it so things can shift. And that's exactly why I've created the Cosmic Money Reset Challenge. This is our fourth season I've supported over 1,500 people before you to make this shift by doing five simple things over the course of five days, guided by five different planets To look at what you've been avoiding, to interrupt the pattern and show yourself you have agency to set the compass of the direction that will inform all of your future financial decisions, to get clear exactly where you are now and map out exactly where you're heading, to establishing the kind of relationship that supports the cheesy stuff you hear people talk about like living your dreams, creating the reality that you want Letting money support you instead of sabotage you It's nothing you need to fit into your calendar. Each day I'll get you the materials, and you can engage them at your own pace and then come back to the group, share, see other people making this shift with you. It's a powerful experience. The link's everywhere to sign up to join us, and we start July 20th. I hope to see you in there