5 Questions a Healthy Youth Ministry Can Answer

Are you ready to unlock the full potential of your youth ministry and create an environment that truly serves your students? We're stepping into the trenches and exploring some critical elements that make a youth ministry healthy. We're engaging with five questions every youth ministry should have answers to in addition to uncovering the importance of fostering a sense of belonging among students.

Book mentioned in this episode:
Growing Young by Kara Powell

Are you ready to take your youth ministry to the next level?
GrowYourYouthMinistry.com

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You may also enjoy these episodes:

(#040) How to Start a Student Leadership Team in Youth Ministry

(#085) How to Do Ministry at a Dying Church

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

I think it's so important that we have to create space for students to get to know students and students to get to know significant adults. What are we doing to make that very easy for them to do, so that the next time they come, someone sees them and can say great to see you again. And we know them by name, we know what grade they're in.

Speaker 2: 0:20

To be able to come into youth group and be like. This is a place where I'm known. Maybe I don't have a ton of friends at school, Maybe I don't have a ton of friends outside of school, but I know when I go to youth group I'm known and loved.

Speaker 1: 0:31

Today we're talking about five questions that every healthy youth ministry should be able to answer.

Speaker 2: 0:48

Welcome to the ministry coach podcast where we bring you weekly tips and tactics to help you fast track the growth and health of your youth ministry. If this is the first time we've met, my name is Jeff Lascola and this is.

Speaker 1: 1:00

Chris and Lascola, and today we have five questions that a healthy youth ministry can answer for its students. So these are questions that a student may not actually verbally ask you, but they're questions that are on a student's mind. They point to a need that students have and if your youth ministry is healthy, they should know the answer to all of these questions. So if you have a student who's been coming for six months or a year or something like that, if you could ask them any one of these questions and they have the answer, I think you're doing really well. So number one is how can I get more involved? So students might show up and they're coming to a weekend service or a midweek program, but they wanna know how to get involved.

Speaker 1: 1:52

I don't know about you, but when I go to a new place, I really wanna know how do I go from just being a person in a chair to someone who is involved and at the core of things and knows what's going on? And the first way you can do this is make sure that they know what's going on. Push information to them, give them your calendar, get their parent on your email list, make sure that they have access to the information they need. There's nothing worse than seeing pictures of an event and a student thinking I would have gone Like. I remember seeing pictures like when I was growing up. What was this event? How come no one told me that looks like a blast?

Speaker 2: 2:34

everyone. It's that feeling when you see your friends Instagram and they're like posting pictures of something you're like. I wasn't invited to that.

Speaker 1: 2:42

Yeah, and how sad, because we know all of our students are invited. It's not a lack of invite, it's more information. So like seeing pictures of a water park and everyone's doing cool stuff, it's like when did that happen? So make sure that students know how they can get involved. When are your events? Can they find the information if they wanna be more than just a weekend or midweek attender, and how can they serve and we're gonna talk more about that later, but people wanna feel useful.

Speaker 2: 3:11

And you said specifically push information to them, not force them to pull the information, correct.

Speaker 1: 3:17

Yeah, I think information what's?

Speaker 2: 3:18

the difference to.

Speaker 1: 3:19

Yeah, information is a push and a pull. So a push would be an email showing up in their parents' email box or handing them a calendar. A pull would be well, it's always available online. You can check our website whenever you want. We update our social media. You can check our social media whenever you want. They're going to you to find it. A push is you're putting it in their hands, making it super easy and accessible. So number two how students wanna be able to answer. How can I be known and know others, meaning they wanna know how can I have meaningful relationships here and students. I would say this has gotta be at the top of the list, I think anyone attending a church or a new group. You wanna know how can I meet people.

Speaker 1: 4:07

How can I be known? So we wanna really give students the opportunity to join small groups. I think that's the number one best way for students to be known, because they immediately go from a face in the crowd to being anchored somewhere of meeting people of their same gender, of a similar age and being known by, hopefully, two adults, not including the youth pastor.

Speaker 1: 4:32

So I love having a co-leader system in my small groups, so two guys and the boy groups, two girls in the girl groups and that are knowing these students, seeing them when they show up and helping connect them to other kids. So I think it's so important that we have to create space for students to get to know students and students to get to know significant adults. What are we doing to make that very easy for them to do, so that the next time they come someone sees them and can say hey, noah, great to see you again, and we know them by name, we know what grade they're in? I think it just gives me, the youth pastor, cringe when a student is just sort of floating around and nobody really knows them. And who's that kid and what's? Someone's gotta know who they are and if you do a small group system, there's no way someone cannot know who they are.

Speaker 2: 5:31

Yeah, and it means a lot. I think too to parents when their student comes in and you say like again, hey, noah, like how are you doing? It's like we're handing our son or daughter off to a group of people, or youth pastor, small group leaders, and all that, that love and care for my child, and it just it's so comforting. It reminds me of the show Cheers, which is like a million years old now. Yeah, and it's true, it's like to be able to go to a place hopefully not a bar like that entire show is based.

Speaker 1: 6:02

But Hopefully, but if that's where the, that's where your youth group meets, then that's fine.

Speaker 2: 6:07

I should be able to come into youth group and be like this is a place where I'm known. Maybe I don't have a ton of friends at school. Maybe I don't have a ton of friends outside of school. But, I know when I go to youth group I'm known and loved. That's huge.

Speaker 1: 6:20

And it's funny sometimes I see students at church on the weekends and they are a youth group kid and I've never met the family and they have this gaggle of kids and it's the parents and they're all shuffle around and I'll just see the junior hire in that little group and I'll be like hey, noah, and their family kind of looks like how does she know you? Who is this?

Speaker 1: 6:40

Yeah, and it's so cool because I know your name as you came and we got to know you when we put you in a small group, and small groups are just really the best model for a relationship that I can see. I have not yet figured out anything better than that. I think it's a pretty accurate Jesus model of discipleship and of community. So small groups, getting students involved right away. If I have a student that only comes on the weekend, I'll push them so hard to you should come on Tuesday. I hope you can come on.

Speaker 2: 7:12

Tuesday.

Speaker 1: 7:12

Cause that's where they're going to be known. I don't have small groups on the weekend, so people could come on the weekend and very well come and go and not be known by another student if they fly under my radar or something like that, which I hope doesn't happen, but I know it does sometimes. Okay, number three. A student should be able to answer why do we exist, meaning, why are we meeting on a Tuesday night? What makes us different? Are we just some kind of youth entertainment center? Are we a boys and girls club?

Speaker 1: 7:46

Are we a YMCA? Why are we even meeting and I talk about that all the time with my students of if Jesus isn't who he says he is and didn't do what he says he did, we wouldn't exist, we wouldn't be, here our church wouldn't be here, I wouldn't have a job and none of this would be happening. We are here for one reason, and it is because of what Jesus has done for us.

Speaker 1: 8:08

So make your youth group crystal clear on we are here because of the gospel and hopefully students will realize that really quickly, that it's not just oh, this is something fun my friends do on a Wednesday or Tuesday night.

Speaker 1: 8:25

but we're here for a very specific reason and let that be known. If your youth group is sort of I think youth groups can go back and forth between way too serious and way, way, way too lax and making sure there's that really great balance of, hey, we're gonna have a really good time, but there's going to be purpose behind what we're doing. And you know me, I don't mean like we're gonna play dodge ball and then we're gonna talk about how it symbolizes Satan's fiery heart Dodging the sin, yeah, in your life.

Speaker 2: 9:03

No, I don't do that kind of stuff, but I just mean, you know there's a couple of youth pastors out there that's like, oh, that's a pretty good idea. I'm gonna tie that into my message this week.

Speaker 1: 9:13

Well, if that is your thing and you like I just Run with it. I don't do themed games like that, I just can't. Even if it was a perfect fit, I think I would just let it go. I mean nope.

Speaker 2: 9:29

Not gonna tie it in, not gonna make that connection.

Speaker 1: 9:31

Oh, I feel like such Dad vibes when I do that, like how a dad would just like Take any moment of fun and make it boring. You know what I mean. Yeah, I was like hey kids, do you know what kind of tree this?

Speaker 2: 9:48

is. I was not the example I thought of too.

Speaker 1: 9:50

Can we just be on a walk? Right let's just be on a walk. I don't care. Well, you know, in 18 that's a maple tree.

Speaker 2: 9:56

What comes from maple trees? Maple there. I remember that going wasn't my dad, it was the neighbor's dad. But nice guy, too much infill. But hey, you do you, you do you. If you want to tie it in, that's fine.

Speaker 1: 10:12

Yeah, that's fine. So, yeah, make sure they're crystal clear on, we have a purpose behind our fun. We're here for fun in the name of Jesus. You know, like it's, we're gonna get there eventually. And any student that comes into your youth group should Leave with that impression of not just like, well, what was that? But oh, wow, these are Jesus people. Right, they're here because of him. So make sure that your students can answer why are we here? To know God and help make him known by to others. Okay, number four, students should be able to answer the question Well, where can I use my gifts? How can I contribute? Students want to contribute something. People want to feel purposeful, people want to feel needed and trusted. There's this whole idea. I Read this book a while ago was by Kara Powell, so she does youth research for the Fuller Institute and she did how to grow young and she was talking about churches that age out and churches that grow young and Like, capture a younger audience and continue to thrive and grow.

Speaker 1: 11:28

One of the principles she talks about, which was really interesting I never forgot, was I think she called it like key chain leadership or something, and basically the idea behind it is You're handing over keys to people and she meant it literally and figuratively. So the people we give keys to meaning, access to leadership, able to make decisions, able to do things. It's this idea of trust. So I have a student who comes in and helps me in the office before weekend services and there's things that she's like wait, what am I doing? Oh, I don't know if I can do that. You know that I'll be like no, you got this, just do this. This. I'll be right here if you need me, but I know you can do it. So people need our trust and they usually can rise to the occasion and if it takes them a few tries, that's okay. But think of anything someone can help you with. Bring them along on that. You know I have this girl and she would set up chairs, you know, before weekend service, and I'd be like those are the most beautiful rows I've ever seen. Thank you so much, those look great. Or before a meeting, I'll be like can you fill these things with ice and help me carry these out? And sometimes people just Feel like I'm on the team right, like just by getting to fill up ice or move a chair or go and print something out or pass Something out.

Speaker 1: 12:54

I had a game today. We played with hula hoops and at the end the hula hoops were all over the floor and my director he's like hey, if you're on our student leadership team, please help pick up the hula hoops. And she just scrambled right over there and other kids not on our leadership team we're trying to pick up the hula hoop. She'll know this is I'm, this is my job. I got this. And it was just like she was just waiting for Action, like anything, put me in, coach, put me in, put me in. And the second he said pick up the hula hoops. She's like you know, like just so excited to have a job to do yeah.

Speaker 1: 13:29

I'm on the team, I'm official, and I think what that shows, like Kara was saying, is like I've given you the keys, you're a part of this, you have access. It's not like um leadership is a very exclusive thing here, and we'll see if you can make it. But we just include everyone in the leadership of like you can help here and you could do that, and would you mind helping me here?

Speaker 1: 13:51

and there's something so special, I know, when somebody in a leadership position asks me to do something for them or with them, I'm like I won't let you down right you know, I'm so excited and we want to give people that opportunity to be invited, not like we got this, you just sit there and relax, but we're a team, we're a church, we're a family and extending that invitation. So students have to know how they can contribute. Student leadership teams are a really great avenue for this. Like I was talking about my student before, she was so excited to clean up the Hula Hoops because it was a student leadership job and she was going to get it done. Student leadership really lends itself to that, because if you have a larger youth group, it narrows down. Well, you're on the team, so I'm going to put you on tech, I'm going to put you on worship, I'm going to put you on setup, I'm going to put you in the snack shack, whatever your jobs might be.

Speaker 1: 14:50

Because sometimes it's just if you have too many kids, you're like, uh, how do I have all of you help? But sometimes just a random ask, like grabbing a kid, like hey, can you do me a huge favor, and they're always like, yes, what can I do? They want to help. People want to help and there's a reason for that. We're meant to serve, and serving should be the place where our cups are filled. And if serving this is kind of talking to you too as a youth pastor, if it's just always leading to burnout, I think we're doing it wrong. We want to lead people into a place where serving fills their cup, puts wind in their sails, makes them excited to come to church, wants to be on a team, not like, oh, these people use and abuse me, I can't do this anymore. But people should feel energized by serving, energized spiritually. So if we're doing it right, they really should feel that way.

Speaker 2: 15:47

Yeah, make sure, if you guys are interested in checking out that book by Kara Powell. You said it was growing young, growing young, unless we messed up the name. But anyways, it'll be in the description below if you guys want to check that out. What's number four?

Speaker 1: 15:59

That was number four, silly goose.

Speaker 2: 16:00

What's number? Five Number five.

Speaker 1: 16:02

I want to hear four again. Well, you're in luck. No, I'm going to number five. You can watch the replay. Number five students need to be able to answer. Can I trust the leadership of this ministry and how do I know?

Speaker 1: 16:17

I think in today's age especially, people are very skeptical of leaders and church leaders especially, and I would say a lot of that is probably well founded. I mean, I have parents that come in and they are trying very hard to raise their kid in the church without letting their own beef with the church color their child's experience. I've had so many parents and grandparents be like I want them to figure it out. I don't want to impose my bias on them. I want them to discover their faith. But it's just not for me. That happens more than you would think, because a lot of times you think, oh, the parents are like oh, I just want my kid to come to church. They need to know Jesus. A lot of the parents are wounded when it comes to the church and I think they're just in maturity, knowing that's not gonna be everyone's experience and I need to let my kid figure out their faith on their own. But they're like dropping them off and then I'll pick them up and good for them.

Speaker 1: 17:31

Good for them if they want to believe, good for them. If they want to do this, they're gonna come to their own conclusion. It's very interesting, and so I think people need to know that you can church, church Trust, church leadership.

Speaker 2: 17:45

Yeah, it's a two-sided coin though, because on the one hand, you have people putting too much faith and Confidence in leadership, like thinking these people are perfect Wish. They're not. They are people, and I'm not Close. On the other side, you have church leaders screwing up.

Speaker 2: 18:06

Yeah and doing things that they shouldn't be doing, and so it's those two things it ends up, you know, being. What you're describing is people like. That's it. You know, I don't believe in God because this pastor, you know, did this or that and it's like, well, that's unfortunate that they did that, but that also doesn't discount anything that God did.

Speaker 1: 18:24

Yeah, that's a weird spot to be when you throw the baby out with the bathwater. This person hurt me. Therefore, god cannot be good or trusted and there's a lot of therapy that needs to be like Working through those wounds because, it is confusing.

Speaker 1: 18:45

for someone who's experienced trauma, it's confusing. Yeah, was it church? Was it God? If you love God and you hurt me, what does that mean about God? Like you know, it can be a confusing place to be, and so we need to make sure, as this generation of pastors, that we are not at all being a stumbling block to somebody's faith and.

Speaker 1: 19:06

Jesus has some pretty strong words to say to people who cause others to stumble in their faith, and he is very passionate about it. So what does that mean for us? Well, we need to make sure that we are modeling Christ likeness and that our lives are full of integrity, so we're just not pretending to be something that we really aren't in our private life, because it will come out eventually it was still out eventually.

Speaker 1: 19:35

Do we genuinely love those that we serve or do we love being on stage? Do we love being served? Do we love the platform? Do we love leadership? Do we like to be the one in charge or are we here to serve and make Jesus known and great? Do we move toward the students? Sometimes, I think leaders are more of a here I am, then a there you are and and wait for people to come to them or believe that I'm too busy or too important To be on your level. I think that there's some broken mentality in some of our church leadership not everybody.

Speaker 1: 20:19

I mean anywhere you go, there's broken people, broken leadership, broken character. So we don't want to give anyone who attends our youth group a future wound right. Well, I don't really want anything to do with the church. I used to go to this church and Nobody this or everyone that or this guy did this or she, blah, blah like we don't. There will be things that we disagree and people will maybe have a hard time with something you said, whatever, but we never want it to be our integrity, our character, moral failure, abuse, anything and I don't just mean I mean like abusing our position, abusing our power or whatever it could be, just making sure we're walking so Carefully in this role.

Speaker 1: 21:08

Yeah what's our public persona online and what are we posting and liking and agreeing with then? Are we using our platform to further the kingdom or to Get involved in something that doesn't really matter? I mean, there's a million things that you could film the blink there. But as leaders, our integrity matters, so so so much. Who you are Matters more than what you say.

Speaker 2: 21:36

Absolutely well where to go next would be. If you guys are looking to start a student leadership team. We have an episode all about how to launch your student leadership team, and also you'd kind of touched on that idea through the Kara power Powell book Growing young. If you are currently at a church that you would describe as a dying church, where your congregation is Definitely way older than it is younger that, we have an episode kind of about that too, so you might want to check that out. All right, question of the day is Pumpkin spice. Is it overrated, underrated or properly rated?

Speaker 1: 22:16

At the risk of sounding basic, it's properly rated.

Speaker 2: 22:22

Oh, okay, I thought you might say underrated.

Speaker 1: 22:25

I don't want to drink it all year. That's why. So, when it comes out, I'm very excited. I had a pumpkin chai at Better Buzz and it was. If you could put every fall holiday into a drink. That's what I drank. It was delicious. And it was not at all underrated, it was just right. It was like yep, this is delicious. And I love it, I love it and I love the smell of it.

Speaker 2: 22:56

Yes and yeah, candles, coffee, all that stuff. I would say it's pretty properly rated because I think, because it is seasonal, you can enjoy the moment and then it's gone and then you miss it, whereas I think if it was around all the time it would lose a lot of its pizzazz. For sure, and he's been on the show before Jeff White. He says he stocks up during this time of year, the fall.

Speaker 1: 23:20

Oh yeah, the international delight. He freezes it. Pumpkin spice cream yeah, I forgot about that. Oh man, so that's a hack.

Speaker 2: 23:30

If you guys want pumpkin spice year round for your coffee, buy them now, put them in your freezer, stock up.

Speaker 1: 23:35

I made us a pumpkin spice smoothie the other day.

Speaker 2: 23:39

It was amazing, gave me pumpkin spice diarrhea, but that's all right.

Speaker 1: 23:45

What didn't? It did not.

Speaker 2: 23:48

Hey, this is the community comment of the day. Well then something else gave me that. No, it's kidding this comes from. I don't know what's happening anymore, but this comes from RJ Orison, who says youth worker must listen. This is a must listen podcast for every youth pastor, director and leader. They have practical advice for youth workers of all experience. I use their Glovernighter episode to do my lock in and it was the best lock in we ever did.

Speaker 1: 24:16

Wow, rj, thank you so much for all the work you put into the podcast Update.

Speaker 2: 24:21

I don't even know you could update reviews. I started going back and listened to older episodes that I may have missed. Every episode has something new for you to learn or pass on to another youth worker. I highly recommend going back and listening to all the episodes. That's awesome. That's the greatest review promo for the podcast ever.

Speaker 1: 24:40

Appreciate it, RJ. All right, you guys.

Speaker 2: 24:42

Thank you so much for watching and listening. Enjoy your pumpkin spice and we will see you next time.

Speaker 1: 24:48

Today, we're talking about five questions that every healthy youthy I said healthy youthy, healthy youthy. Today, we're talking about five questions that every healthy youth ministry. Today, we're talking about five questions.