Ministry Coach: Youth Ministry Tips & Resources
Kristen Lascola from North Coast Church gives weekly insight and tips on how to grow the size and health of your Youth Ministry! With over 20 years in Student Ministry, Kristen shares her knowledge and experiences and frequently features guests from various ministries, churches and leadership roles so that you can use proven strategies to increase your impact from your leadership role. This podcast will help you grow your leadership skills, enhance your youth group, learn new youth group games, put on impactful youth ministry events, build a thriving volunteer staff, grow your influence and create a healthy environment so that you can help take the ministry God has you in to the next level. Hit subscribe and get ready to advance your youth ministry!
Ministry Coach: Youth Ministry Tips & Resources
You Will NEVER Be Fully Prepared for Youth Ministry - 3 Reasons Why
Are you looking to grow the size and health of your youth ministry? Check out
GrowYourYouthMinistry.com *** Stepping into the world of youth ministry often feels like venturing into uncharted territory. It's a journey that will teach you invaluable lessons that formal education simply can't cover. This episode unravels the three reasons why youth pastor's will never be fully prepared for student ministry...but that is okay! We promise you’ll walk away with a deeper understanding of how real-world challenges sharpen your skills and faith beyond the classroom.
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Book Mentioned in this Podcast:
Lead Like a Shepherd by Larry Osborne
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We love hearing from you all and we do our best to provide powerful and insightful youth ministry content on a weekly basis to be that coach and mentor you may not have, but desperately need.
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You may also enjoy these episodes:
(#093) Youth Pastor Self-Care: Making Time for Yourself & Avoid Burnout
(#168) Listen to This if You Are Thinking About Quitting Youth Ministry
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Today we're talking about three reasons why you will never be fully prepared for youth ministry.
Speaker 2:Welcome to the Ministry Coach Podcast, where every week, we give you actionable and practical tips that you can implement into your youth ministry.
Speaker 1:My name is Jeff Laskola and this is Kristen Laskola Howdy-do, and today we're going to give you three reasons why you will never be fully prepared to be a youth pastor. Just quit, no, just start, just start, yeah. So if you've been in youth ministry for a while, you probably are like, yeah, nothing could have prepared me for the job that I thought I was going to do and the job that I'm actually doing. And if you're just getting your feet wet or maybe thinking about becoming youth pastor, this is hopefully going to encourage you. If you feel ill-equipped, if you don't feel ready, if you look at other people and you're like I can never be them, I can never do what they do. It's probably true who you are right now Maybe not, but we're going to talk about how you become that person and what I think are the three best ways to grapple with that concept that like, yeah, none of us are ever truly ready, like you're never truly ready to be a parent and you're never truly ready to get married.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like there's some things that you can prepare for, but until you actually start doing it, you don't know what kind of parent you are, what your specific struggles will be, what kind of spouse you are, and what part of marriage is going to be hardest for you, what part is going to be the best for you, and everyone's strengths and weaknesses are going to be so different until you actually start doing it.
Speaker 1:So number one sums it up in saying that the best training to become a youth pastor is on the job training, and I truly believe that. So if you were to Google like how to become a youth pastor is on the job training, and I truly believe that. So if you were to Google like how to become a youth pastor which maybe some of you have, if you really want to do ministry, you'll see that the number one result is usually something having to do with a degree. So, whether that's like they, it usually says something about at least a two year degree or at least a bachelor's degree in youth ministry or some kind of theological studies or some kind of seminary, something like that, which those things are amazing.
Speaker 1:And like you probably cannot put a price tag on the things that you would learn in those classes. I'm a communications major. I do have a degree, but I did not go to school for ministry, and I think that surprises a lot of people, because in my early days of being a youth pastor especially, people would say, well, what are your qualifications? Like not people necessarily that I was doing ministry with, but like people on the outside, like what do you do for a living? Oh, I'm a youth pastor. Oh, like what, what's your qualifications? I think they kind of wanted to know well, did you go to seminary? And they would even ask that explicitly. So you went to seminary and I'm like no, I'm actually a communication major, but I study the Bible real hard, you know, and I don't have a theological degree, and some of you might, and that is incredible. I'm not diminishing that at all. However, there's a lot of things that the classroom just cannot prepare us for, no matter what field you're going into, and so you know, my path, I felt like, was very much education on the job, and so I started as a volunteer. So if you want to become a youth pastor, I'd say the best number one step is to be a volunteer in youth ministry, because what I knew as a volunteer is so valuable because now I lead volunteers it's like school administrators are always former teachers, right.
Speaker 1:And so, starting as a volunteer and starting to sort of understand what youth ministry is and what it's about and learning from other leaders, and then I became an intern. So it was very part-time, you know, I just did a couple of hours a week in the office and started to see a little bit of the behind the scenes, and so I kind of went to the next level and then they said how about your directors? There's four directors in this ministry. How about you're one of them? Okay, so then I learned that directorship. I wasn't the head pastor, I wasn't the lead pastor, I had one over me and I learned things at a director level. And then a youth pastor position opened up and I took that job, all at the same church. So, all that to say, every single one of those was my education.
Speaker 1:It was this on the job, training, and what the classroom can't offer you is it can offer you a lot in terms of knowledge, theology, and I know it does. Some of the degrees do a lot of like pastoral and ministry training, but here's the thing Every church and every ministry is so different, and so that education is valuable, but it hits a point where you're going to have to just go for it to figure out. Well, what does ministry now look like here in this state?
Speaker 1:and this city and this town at this church for this high school or this junior high school and those are so specific, those cultures, that until you're really a part of it like I've been doing youth ministry 20 years I've grown a youth ministry Like I've had a lot of great things happen, a lot of hard things happen just because I have all this experience, I do not think I could go and get hired at any church I wanted, because I think I don't know about that.
Speaker 1:I don't think so, because I'm probably a good fit for some churches and I'm probably not a good fit for other churches.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like every church has such a specific culture and the way they do things and their vibe and what they value in leadership, and it's not like I'm not a Christian so they're not going to hire me. It could be something not having to do with theology at all, it just could be a cultural thing, a chemistry thing, and so when you get in that church, that's where your education stops and the experience begins. It's like how do I fit into this culture? And that's what I mean by on the job. Training is the best, because there's excellent pastors that are probably just the wrong fit for a specific church and they're not thriving because it's like I'm a good pastor, but not for this context, you know, and finding that church and studying that culture, and who do I have to be, what do they value, what is their leadership protocol, how does their team function All of that is so nuanced and how could you know that sitting in a classroom, right?
Speaker 1:So the best education for me has been working alongside other really great pastors and leaders, and small group leaders and volunteers soaked it all in. Like the first time I led a small group, I led with this girl who was fantastic and I just watched everything she did, how she talked to the kids, how she disciplined the kids, how she handled difficult questions, all the things. And then becoming an intern, I looked at the other staff members. How do they interact with each other? What's like their sense of humor, what do they like to do? And like just studying the whole thing and so just learning really from other people that have gone before us and just soaking that in which, again, the classmates sitting next to you in the classroom they're not going to be following you into your church.
Speaker 1:You can still learn great things from them. But how do you do ministry at your church? That's what you're going to learn on the job.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, that makes total sense because that, on the job training, on the job experience, that's what's going to sharpen you more than anything else.
Speaker 1:Right, and so don't worry. If you don't have the education, just start volunteering. Just go for it. Just learn youth ministry. No matter if you have a degree in business, youth ministry degree, communication degree just go for it.
Speaker 1:Like on no matter if you have a degree in business, youth ministry degree, communication degree just go for it. Like on the job training, okay. Number two if you don't feel fully prepared for youth ministry, it's okay, because this is now number two is kind of more. If you're already in youth ministry, you need to cycle an entire class through before you can even really know the fruit or the results of your youth ministry. So if you're getting started, you might be asking yourselves am I ready for this? Is this going well? How am I doing? And I think I've shared this before Our senior pastor says when youth pastors ask him how's my youth ministry doing?
Speaker 1:How am I doing? Like from where you sit, like, is everything good? Do you like what's happening? He's like I don't know. Ask me again in five years, like, how could I know how, what your ministry is producing? Until you've cycled an entire class through, don't get too hard on yourself in the first few years. We went to a conference recently for DYM and it's your first decade in youth ministry and I love that because it's like your first decade. That's insinuating you're going to be here for a while which I love.
Speaker 2:So those first of many decades.
Speaker 1:Yes, hopefully. And those first five years is kind of like all right, what did the ministry produce? What kind of kids came out of this ministry? What do they know? Are they coming back to the church as adults? Are they serving in the ministry?
Speaker 1:I had the best conversation with a high school freshman today and she was like how old do I have to be to come back and start helping out in junior high with you? And I'm like well, you can start being a co-leader with an adult leader as a junior in high school. I said, as long as you don't turn into a sketchy high schooler. And she started laughing. She's like okay, I'll come back my junior year. And it's funny because on Tuesday there was this kid that came back and I didn't even know he was coming. He just showed up and I'm like hi, oh my gosh, I haven't seen you in forever. He goes yeah, you told me to come back when I was a junior if I wanted to be a junior leader. And I'm like oh my gosh, yes, I did, welcome, I'm so happy you're here. So he was like like set a countdown on his phone or something to that day. And so that was pretty exciting to see him again Cause I loved him. But yeah, like that's showing, hey, this is something that people continue to want to be a part of, even after they're gone. They can't wait to come back because their faith was formed here and they want to do the same for others, and that is fruit.
Speaker 1:I think that we could do a whole episode on the benefits of that. And so don't be too hard on yourself in year one, two and three, but start to pay attention to all right, once I've gotten a whole class through my ministry, whether that's sixth grade to eighth grade or sixth grade to 12th grade, I know a lot of you guys are combined. But what kind of Christians, what kind of Jesus followers is this youth ministry producing? How far is this fruit reaching? Are we reaching the lost? Are kids inviting their friends? And that's when we know, all right, there's something happening here. And so just be patient in those first few years, because you're still figuring it out, because, again, you're not fully prepared to be a youth pastor. You're learning as you go and you're adjusting as needed to see, all right, what kind of people are coming out of this ministry, what do they know? How do they serve? Like what? Like? The whole point is discipleship right and we're trying to our churches.
Speaker 1:It's not called a motto. What is it Like a mission statement? It's making disciples in a healthy church environment. And so, whatever that mission statement is for you, once you've graduated that class through, can you look back and say we did that. Yeah, we made disciples. It was a healthy church environment. And here's the proof. We have people coming back to serve. We have people raising their families and the church. We have lifelong Christians. We have people continuing to walk with Jesus long after youth ministry years are over and wanting to now impart that into the next generation. That was a success for the mission statement. So assess that for yourself. If you don't feel ready to be a youth pastor, if you're still figuring that out, what is that that you want? Like, our ministry would be a success if we made disciples in a healthy church environment. Okay, how do you measure that? How do you know when that has happened? Because churches put emphasis, emphasize, emphasis on all.
Speaker 2:Put an emphasis there. That's better.
Speaker 1:On all kinds of different things. You know missions or outreach, or you know our church is a heavy focus on discipleship. So is the mission getting accomplished according to your church mission statement and challenges that literally nothing can prepare you for. And here's the good news you will have to seek God so hard on these. So our one of our senior pastors, larry Osborne if you aren't reading a Larry Osborne book currently, you should be, because Lead Like a Shepherd. Every Pastor Should Read it by Larry Osborne. I get no royalties for that, but I can't hide that that is too good of a book.
Speaker 2:We can get affiliate commission though, if you do click on the link Like 25 cents, come on Click away.
Speaker 1:So Larry has this concept that he talks about, not in that book necessarily, but just in general. He says God has this way of doing a just in time delivery system, meaning God doesn't give you the grace to fight a future battle today, so God is going to give you the grace to fight the battle in the moment when you need it. Like he uses the example of God gives dying grace to dying men. You know, you look at like this is going to take a dark turn, but I'm so afraid of dying and what will it be like in that moment and I won't be able to handle it and I'll be so afraid and it's too mysterious and I don't know exactly what happens. Like I trust Jesus but and he says well, are you dying right now? No, so you don't have what you need to face death right now, because you're not dying now.
Speaker 1:Like it's this whole idea of trusting that God is going to give you what you need in that moment. You know it's like the manna, like we want to hoard it, Like God's providing it that moment, you know it's like the manna, like we want to hoard it, like God's providing it that morning.
Speaker 1:And he says, take what you need for the day. But we're like, but what if I want it for tomorrow? And what if I get in a pickle and I don't have food? And he's like just trust that, I'm going to keep doing it. And you know, when they hoarded it, it started to rot and spoil and the maggots, you know, it was gross. And it's this whole exercise in trusting God and I think of the leadership of Joshua too. So and we see this example over and over again in scripture and the way that God like who, how would Joshua have possibly thought Hmm, let's get prepared, guys, cause I think we're going to have to march around this city?
Speaker 2:What was it? Seven times.
Speaker 1:Then we're going to blow this horn, and then we're going to blow this horn and then we're going to do this for three days, yeah.
Speaker 1:But it was like, okay, god, what's the plan? Like I'm showing up here, I'm ready to do battle, I'm ready to, like, follow your lead, what's the plan? And it's not like, ah, okay, step one for conquering the city, march around it for three days. Like that's now not the prescription for conquering anywhere else in the Bible. It only worked that one time. Like it was only like the method for that one problem.
Speaker 1:And I'm not saying that so God's changing all the time, you know. But what I am saying is that God works in specific situations, sometimes in specific ways, and you don't know until it's go time. You know there's been things where, like my staff has said, kristen, like you're, you always know what to do next. Like, whenever we face a problem, you always know what to do next. And I'm like I don't know how. I know it's not because I'm like I'm studying this handbook on, like church leadership, it's being in step with the voice of God constantly and knowing enough scripture to know okay, this is what I want to do. But I know this is wrong.
Speaker 1:Always do what's right, whether it feels right or not. Right now, this is what is right, even though it doesn't feel right, based on the scripture, let's go. You know, and you hear the voice of God through his word. You hear it through prayer, you hear it through, sometimes through other people, but being like that, joshua, okay, here's a new problem we've never faced. Is it a new solution? Like God, what are you going to do? Are you going to provide something that I couldn't have seen coming and I've seen him do that over and over and over again in ministry, like I've looked everywhere for the solution come to the like, hit a wall on everyone and all of a sudden, it's like out of the sky on a platter, here's the solution.
Speaker 1:I'm like I see what you did there, you know, and so pray up like pray, pray up. Pastors should be people who pray the most, because I've heard it said, prayerlessness may be our greatest sin because of who it says we think is in charge.
Speaker 1:I probably botched the word order there, but you know what I mean Like who's in charge? Are we in charge of the ministry, or is God in charge of the ministry? And if he truly is, then, like we stay prayed up so that we can hear his leading, his direction, his voice as we face these things that we're so not prepared to do, it's this exercise in trust that? No, god, I want to feel the grace I need right now to deal with that really difficult parent, because if I have to have that conversation I'm going to die. Like it's too awkward, it's so uncomfortable I'm not going to be able to handle it.
Speaker 1:Or when I have to let a leader go oh my gosh, they're also my friend and that's going to be way too hard. Or I don't know how to discipline students. Like what do I do? What do I say? What if I do the wrong thing? And there other senior pastor, chris Brown. He always says trying to do spiritual work without the Holy Spirit is like a dry, barren wasteland and you will be just eking your way through this like army crawling through the desert, you know, without the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 1:So trusting and calling on the Holy Spirit as a pastor, because, going back again to our title, none of us are fully prepared for this Like there's been conversations that, as the words are coming out of my mouth, I'm like I didn't know, I knew that. Like talking people off a ledge of like I'm not, I don't know what to say.
Speaker 1:If you were to ask me right now what would you say to someone who is struggling with some kind of mental health crisis? I'd be like I'm not, I don't know what to say. If you were to ask me right now what would you say to someone who is struggling with some kind of mental health crisis? I'd be like I don't know.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:But in that moment I'm just like Holy Spirit I need you, I need you.
Speaker 1:And then these words sometimes come out of my mouth, where I'm like five minutes later I don't even know what I said, but it worked Like it was Jesus and he shows up. And that's not to say so. Never prepare, like, obviously. But what I'm saying is there will be so many things in youth ministry that conversations you never thought you'd be able to have. Difficult decisions, you never thought you'd be able to make hard leadership calls that you never thought you'd be able to do. Standing firm on a belief or a passion when, when people you love are disagreeing, you never thought you'd be able to do it. Being brutally honest with someone when it's time to be brutally honest with someone, you would think these things are terrifying, but there's something about calling on the Holy Spirit in those moments where he gives us that just in time delivery of like you need it. Now. Here we go, and I've honestly felt him like take over my words, my mind, my thoughts and, like I said, if I were to try to reiterate it, I can't because it didn't come from me.
Speaker 1:I don't really know what I said, blacked out.
Speaker 1:Blacked out for a moment, came to, yeah, and I've had people even record me, like during these sessions with them, because they're like, oh my gosh, this is exactly what you know. You know I needed to hear and I'd be like great, I'd love to hear that too, because I don't, I don't know what just happened. So that's why the keeping of our souls as pastors is so important. Um, you know, we've said it before You're the most important person in your ministry. Not that you are like Cleopatra or something like that, but it's you're so important because the condition of your soul is so vit, so important because the condition of your soul is so vitally important to the health of your ministry.
Speaker 1:You know, if you can't hear the Holy Spirit anymore, if you're not in tune with what God's trying to do in the lives of your students and your staff and your leaders anymore, if you can't hear him anymore, how are you leading Like? How are you a spiritual leader Like? How could you do it? Just by your wits and your smarts. You know, like.
Speaker 2:It's not going to get you so far. Exactly Not very far.
Speaker 1:Exactly, you know, and that's, I think, when we hit this wall of like I can't do this. Of course you can't, Because these conversations where ministry takes you, you're like how am I having this conversation right now, how am I making this decision right now, how am I in charge of this right now? You know, and it was like desperation of calling on the Lord that I'm like that's the only reason I'm still here again, Cause I was never prepared for ministry in the first place. I was never fully prepared. Sure, I had been a Christian for a long time and I had volunteered, and you know I was. I had gone to college, not for ministry, I mean, but there was nothing that could have prepared me for the things I would have had to do. It's only by the grace of God. So we'll kind of close with this.
Speaker 1:A good question that I've heard come up over and over again in our church is you know, if the Holy Spirit were to leave your ministry, how long would it take you to notice? And our senior pastor, he said, you know, when I was in youth ministry, I was like I would never notice, you know, because he was writing his gifts, not the momentum of the Holy Spirit and coming to the end of yourself is sort of like, well, that's the, that's all I got, Like you know so. So just trust that God will give you what you need when you need it and don't worry so much if you don't feel like, oh, I watch what pastors do. I can never do that, yeah, Maybe not right now, but trust God with your future.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's strong. And also make sure that, once you are in a position whether you are a youth pastor right now or you're going to be that you're consistently taking care of yourself with that soul care and things like that. And we've done episodes and we can link those below just to make sure that you are caring for yourself. All right, let's do a question of the day, and this is what is? An animal that has chased you? A?
Speaker 1:dog, that is not a dog. I got chased by a wild squirrel once and it was a very strange experience because we were alone in the forest together, you and the squirrel yeah like there's no one around, and I was just on this path and I was where was this? It was at a christ camp. I was by myself, like it was the off season, so they let pastors like use their cabins.
Speaker 1:So, I went on like a solo retreat. I left that night. I was too scared and so I was like walking to my cabin and there's literally no one on the grounds and there's this squirrel up on this like telephone pole and he just like looks at me and I look at him and I'm just like okay, and then he like mad dog he's like his head is turning watching me go and then he runs down the telephone pole and just starts running after me on the path and I started running and he kept running and I'm like check, please, time to go.
Speaker 1:I don't like it here. It was too creepy, so yeah I don't know what he wanted. Exactly what was his end goal. Like if I would have stopped, would he have stopped, but I was panicking, I don't know.
Speaker 2:That's funny. I don't think I've ever heard you tell that story Really, yeah.
Speaker 1:I blocked it out. It's so scary I tell it's like to me, kind of not. The devil took on the form of a squirrel that day it's not that funny.
Speaker 2:It was so creepy, I don't know like just the way he looked at me. Finally just give up I guess, I think you outrun the squirrel I probably did.
Speaker 1:I'm really fast. Um, yeah, I guess it was just the way he was looking at me. He just seemed a little too interested. Why is that squirrel looking at me? Funny? Anyways, let's move on.
Speaker 2:I uh, one time in mammoth when I was a kid we got chased by a bear which sounds scary and it kind of was, but he didn't really put much effort into it. Um, we saw him at the like down by the creek.
Speaker 1:I guess just drinking water or something by the creek where the bears there he was.
Speaker 2:So it was like surreal, because it's like, oh my gosh, there's a bear, like seeing like there's a coyote or there's a fox, it's like cool. And then it was like wait, we're kind of close and bears eat beets and people. So Battlestar.
Speaker 2:Galactica. So I thought, uh, this probably isn't good. So we started kind of moving away and then he turned, noticed us and started kind of like this lazy trot is the best way I could describe it, but he was. He was moving at a decent clip. So we just started running and we went across this like little man-made bridge thing, and then we got far enough away and we turned back and he obviously gave up. But it went from like how cool? To like oh no, this is not good.
Speaker 2:So he gave up. Put in the comments below if you've ever been chased by an animal not a dog and see what kind of crazy stories you guys might have. We'd love to read those. All right, so this is the community comment of the day. Have, we'd love to read those? All right, so this is the community comment of the day. And this comes from Novi's mom and she's responding to what she loves about this podcast and she said I love that you're just real about the many facets of youth ministry, devotionals, parents, how tiring it is, how rewarding it is, how expensive it can be, and that your suggestions and guidance work for three teens, or a ton of teens.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much.
Speaker 1:We appreciate that and that is one of the goals.
Speaker 2:We want to make sure that any advice that's given on this podcast is applicable, whether you're just starting out or you're a seasoned vet, whether you have a small ministry, a huge one, whatever your context is.
Speaker 1:So we appreciate that Thanks Novi's mom. Thank you so much for watching and listening, and we'll see you next time, and today we're gonna give you five nope it's not five.
Speaker 2:What's? What am I trying to say?
Speaker 1:that's showing like hey, you, you, you, you, you, you a youth ministry or a youth ministry degree, just spit on me.