Is it a Crisis or an Awakening?

It is truly amazing how within a split second everything in a person’s life can dramatically change.

I often come face to face with the shock and horror of sudden crises through my client work. I see the emotional, mental and physical devastation caused by nervous breakdowns, diagnoses of life-threatening illnesses, relationship breakdowns, bereavements, and the loss of livelihoods and security.

What I find most striking is how we all go through life on autopilot, doing the same things day after day with very little thought. That is until a crisis strikes, and our whole world comes crashing down around us and we're left drowning in a sea of emotional and mental confusion and chaos.

But are all crises inherently bad for us?

The experience of going through a crisis is certainly dreadful. It brings to the fore difficult and disturbing feelings, and it can shake us to the core. No one likes to be in emotional turmoil and feel out of control.

But, I would say that in the long term crises can be a powerful force and opportunity for personal growth and positive change. In this podcast I offer 12 reasons why.

Thanks for listening!

You can discover more about my work on my website: https://www.harinderghatora.co.uk

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Transcript

Hello,

It’s Harinder here, Holistic Life Coach ...helping you to bring peace and balance back into your life. 

It is truly amazing how within a split second everything in a person’s life can dramatically change.

I often come face to face with the shock and horror of sudden crises through my client work. I see the emotional, mental and physical devastation caused by nervous breakdowns, diagnoses of life-threatening illnesses, relationship breakdowns, bereavements, and the loss of livelihoods and security.

What I find most striking is how we all go through life on autopilot, doing the same things day after day with very little thought.

That is until a crisis strikes, and our whole world comes crashing down around us ....and we are thrown off balance. In a split second, the strategies we once relied upon to help us navigate through life no longer work, and we are left drowning in a sea of emotional and mental confusion and chaos.

This chaos can last hours, days, months, and even years.

But are all crises inherently bad for us?

The experience of going through a crisis is certainly dreadful. It brings to the fore difficult and disturbing feelings, and it can shake us to the core. No one likes to be in emotional turmoil and feel out of control.

But, I would say that in the long term crises can be a powerful force and opportunity for personal growth and positive change. Here are 12 reasons why.

1. A crisis literally stops us in our tracks. The things that normally demand our attention are no longer a priority. We are forcefully catapulted into the present moment. And we have to focus on dealing with what is at hand whether we like it or not. 
2. A crisis diverts our attention away from the outside world and forces us to look inwards, especially if we are struggling to cope. How many of us go through life disconnected from ourselves? ourselves? When we’re confronted with a crisis we are compelled to reflect and reconnect with our true inner self. It’s like we forced back home…back into ourselves. 
3. A crisis forces us to re-evaluate ourselves and our life. We have little choice but to take a long, hard look at every aspect of our inner and outer world so that we can find a way forward. We have to work out how we can put the pieces back together, and return to a state of balance. 
4. A crisis forces us to re-evaluate our priorities and separate out those things that are important from those that are not. We start to live a life that is truer to ourselves. 
5. A crisis prompts greater self-care and a more caring, loving relationship with ourselves – if we allow it. This is something very few of us do naturally. Self care wasn’t something that I was taught growing up. I’ve had to learn this for myself and every crisis has helped me cultivate a more accepting and compassionate attitude to myself. Nowadays, when life throws me a curved ball the first thing I do is up my self-care and start taking better care of my own needs so I can get back into balance as quickly as possible. 
6. A crisis sheds light on dysfunctional patterns of thinking and behaviours that need to change. Life presents us with an opportunity to purge ourselves of old habits that no longer serve us. A health issue, for example, might prompt us to review our lifestyle; our diet, our exercise, our sleep, and our ability to manage stress. 
7. A crisis helps us to acknowledge the love and support of others in our lives. It also does another interesting thing; it allows us to assess who is really there for us in our time of need and who is not. That is useful information going into the future. 
8. A crisis helps us to dig deep and discover hidden strengths and resources that we may previously have been unaware of. We often uncover positive qualities and skills that we didn’t know we had. Did you know you were so courageous, or flexible, or smart until this crisis hit? 
9. A crisis helps us to find new coping strategies and ways of being that make us stronger and more resilient for the future. There’s that old saying that if something doesn’t kill you, it will definitely make you stronger and, I would add, wiser. Whenever I’m struggling with life I remind myself that I’ve been through worse, and if I survived all that back then I’ll get through this too. 
10. A crisis softens our hearts and makes us more compassionate towards others. I know from experience that the kindest and most understanding people I’ve ever come across have all experienced the most challenging of lives. There seems to be a direct link between experiencing adversity and being a kind, empathic person. 
11. A crisis helps us to get a whole new perspective on life. As we try to find our feet again, we naturally become more inquisitive and open to new information, ideas, concepts and philosophies. This leads to personal growth and can completely change our view of the world.
12. And finally, a crisis can trigger an awakening within us. Going through a period of great difficulty prompts us to question the purpose and meaning of events in our lives. This can lead to a newfound awareness that there is something bigger than ourselves at play. For many, it opens a door into the spiritual dimension of life. There have been times in my younger life when it felt like there was no-one to turn to… no-one could help… no-one had the answers…I had no option but to turn to inwards… to turn to God. Every crisis since then has cemented my faith, cultivated my spiritual wisdom, heightened my perspective. and shown me that there is always support from some energy much greater than my own. 

Going through a crisis is very similar to having your house come tumbling down around you after an earthquake. One minute you are happily living in the house; the next minute you are sitting on a pile of rubble. For a while you are so stunned by what has happened that all you can do is merely sit in the debris. You feel shaken, frightened and confused. 

But then a time soon comes when you realise that you can’t just sit there forever; you have to do something about the mess your life is in. You then dig deep and find the resources you need to start rebuilding yourself. You pick up one brick at a time. You assess whether it can be reused, or whether it needs to be discarded. You take each brick, one by one, and start to rebuild your house. Until eventually, a day comes when you realise that the new house you are living in now is so much better than the old one.

My own life experiences have led me to reframe any crisis that I am faced with as either a wake-up call or a breakthrough. Every difficulty I have ever been through has ultimately led me to a) become a better version of myself, and b) lead a better, more fulfilling, more purposeful life.

As Scott Peck said,

“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.”

So, if life is uncomfortable for you at the moment, see if you can find the blessing in it. You may have to look hard but it will be there…somewhere hidden under all the debris. And, remember, you don’t have to deal with everything on your own. Seek out the support you need and find a way through your challenges as quickly as you can.

Okay, that’s it for now. Enjoy the rest of your day. And, remember, take excellent care of yourself because, we both know, that if you don’t no-one else will.

Bye for now.