Deny Caballero Answers Audience Questions on Military Transition, Identity, and Purpose | Security Halt!

In this episode, Green Beret veteran Deny Caballero answers audience questions about transitioning out of the military and finding purpose after service.

Topics include:

Military transition challenges
 Identity after Special Forces
 Finding purpose after service
 Building a support network
 Failure and personal growth

Deny also explains why he created Security Halt and his mission to support veterans navigating life after the military.

This is a must-listen for anyone preparing for transition.

CHAPTERS:
00:00 Deny Caballero Answers Audience Questions Introduction
00:57 Losing Identity After Military Service
02:46 Why Military Transition Is So Difficult
04:49 How Veterans Build Support Networks
05:37 Special Forces Identity and Culture Explained
07:12 How Veterans Find Purpose After Service
08:44 Transition Mistakes Veterans Must Avoid
10:18 Why Early Transition Preparation Matters
11:50 Failure and Growth After Military Service
16:36 Why Deny Caballero Created Security Halt
19:24 Advice for Veterans Struggling With Transition
23:08 The Future Mission of Security Halt

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Transcript

Q&A Kickoff And Tone Shift

SPEAKER_01 0:04

Welcome back to another Still Episode Security Podcast. As always, I'm your host, Denny Caballero. And today I'm answering your questions. So let's check them out. Because um I apologize. It's been a minute. I promised I was gonna do more of these, and uh I've just let all the but although I've been slipping, I have cataloged them. And now we're gonna dive into them. I figure there's just a lot of negative stuff out in the news between uh Epsy files, Mechs go on fire. Figure we could just, you know, focus on something else. Not VA news, not anything, mental health. We're just gonna dive into some of the questions you guys have submitted. Some of these are doozies. All right. First one up. Do you ever stop feeling like a green beret? Or is it something you carry forever? You know, dude, I will say this. Um it was a chapter, man. Chapter of my life. But as I've grown and adapted and evolved in my journey, I realized that what I'm hopeful for is the part of me that identified so much with that prestigious job. It is only this much. I hope that the rest of my life I build on what I've created and take it further and understand that I'm more. I'm more than that. That's a chapter in my life. It's great. I'm proud, honored to have been able to sit amongst giants. But ultimately, there's more to me. I know that now. I think we do a disservice by hanging on to it, by making it the core aspect of our identity. I think it's harmful in the long run. I think it's great that I get to honor it and I get to serve that population because I'm still working for uh a few nonprofits that get to serve that community. And it's something that will always be a part of me, but it is not my identity. It is not deeply the first focal point of what I think about myself when I wake up in the morning. Uh now I get to focus on being a father, being a husband, being a mentor, being a champion of others, and supporting others within our community and outside of it. So I'm more than that. I'm I'm Denny. So I hope I answer that. I hope that got around to it. What was the hardest part about losing the daily structure after leaving group? Ooh. I'll be 100% honest. Accountability and and and physical fitness being around individuals that were the epitome of physical proudness and that you slack, man, you let it let it go. And um, you know, that's that's part of the reason why I started you know focusing on things like Project Forge, championing people to get out there and try to be physically active whenever you can fit it in. My second workout of the day is after this, but understanding that mental health and your physical well-being are deeply connected. So if we want to champion one, we have to champion the other. We have to understand that what we do physically impacts us up here. So it was definitely the structure, being around other people that were better than me in physical abilities that uh inspire me to be better. Now it's very much me against me, focusing on what I want to do, but I'm I'm grateful that while I slipped, I didn't fall by the wayside too much. How do you deal with missing a team room?

SPEAKER_00 3:47

Well, this one's um this one's like something I talk about all the time.

SPEAKER_01 3:52

The team room is bigger on the outside. LGOPs, little groups of paratroopers. Build your own team room. Build your own support structure, build your friends group. Right now, we're a lot of us are digital nomads or people that are separated by you know from your core friends from where you choose to live, where you choose to work. Be willing to stay connected and connect with each other on a daily basis, if not weekly. Find your rhythm, find a way to stay connected and grow your network. Connect with the people that didn't serve. Open up that aperture. Be willing to dive into the uncomfortable seas of getting to know people and not having to dive into the military back uh echo chamber to stay relevant, be willing to make new friends, be willing to experience new things and grow your own team room.

SPEAKER_00 4:45

Team Room's a great experience, and I'm grateful for that part of my life, like I said. But it's greater on the outside.

SPEAKER_01 4:57

You can make your team room on the outside inclusive to all sorts of people: SEALs, rangers, paratroopers, legs, civilians that never serve, doctors, friggin' people uh of titans of the industry, different industries. You can have so many different friends that are there to support you. And in fact, some of the most important relationships in my life today, uh, from people I look up to, people that have mentored me, people that continue to pour into my cup, or some people that never served. So I challenge you to grow your team room. Be willing to make friends with people that don't have the same background as you.

SPEAKER_00 5:42

What's something civilians will never fully understand about special forces? Oh man. The big one. I see it a lot working in a nonprofit space. People that want to be affiliated. No matter what you do, no matter how you interact with what you provide, it doesn't gain you entry into the team room.

Rock Bottom, Purpose, And Acceptance

SPEAKER_01 6:17

There's no hashtag or or asterisk marker for being so cool to hang out with that you're you're a Green Beret or your Ranger, your SEAL, or CCT. We need to understand that these communities are exclusive for a reason. And it's okay. It's okay. Just because you support a nonprofit, support an organization, support a community of individuals doesn't make you part of it. And I think that's all right. I think it's okay that you can't be a part of it. You can still support. But that's the weirdest thing. That just because you donate money or you you know a X amount of different special operators, that doesn't make you one of them. Like I think fanboying is a big problem. I think it's a big problem. I think people need to be comfortable in who they are and what they've done and chosen to do in life, and it's okay to not be part of those communities. All right, transition. What was your lowest point after leaving the military? Oh man.

SPEAKER_00 7:24

Um my absolute rock bottom. Finding that purpose, not having that purpose for a while.

Biggest Transition Mistake

SPEAKER_01 7:36

Purpose and identity. I was somebody that was deeply connected to that rank, that beret, that tab, because I felt that was the only thing I'd ever accomplished in life. And when I let go of that idea, you don't have to have anything. You just have to let go of it. Be willing to bet on yourself again, be willing to try to succeed again in something else. That's what helped me. Radical acceptance. I'm not gonna be this anymore. I'm not gonna try to be this. I'm not gonna try to hold on to this. And by and large, I think I've been pretty successful in that. I've found my new identity, I've found my new purpose, I found my new mission, and I've worked hard to find that, I worked hard and strove and have made a lot of um a lot of ground in the space. Choosing to be positive, choosing to do good, and making that a purpose and identity outside of the uniform. Um, I think that's something that I needed. Yes, absolutely. That's what I did. It's something I'm proud of, but it's not all who I am. It's not it's not the entirety of who I am. What was the biggest mistake you made during transition? Oh man.

SPEAKER_00 8:56

Putting too much faith and value in the advice and journey of other people.

SPEAKER_01 9:07

I put a lot of stock in what other people had to say about what I should do. Luckily, that didn't pan out. And luckily, I was able to find my own way and stick to my own guns. But for a while there, I was really hyper-focused on what other people define us being successful and their routes. And I'm I'm grateful and I'm actually pretty damn lucky that I had the moment of clarity and chose to figure things out in my own way. Otherwise, this wouldn't be here. This wouldn't exist, and I I don't know where I'd be. I don't know what I'd be doing. Maybe maybe be easier, maybe be an easier route, but I would do know this. I wouldn't be fulfilled as I am. High likelihood that I would not be fulfilled. A high likelihood that I'd be doing something that would make somebody else a whole lot more money and make somebody else a lot happier and diminish my happiness and my own control of my life.

Prepare Early For Civilian Life

SPEAKER_00 10:11

And and I'm glad I'm where I'm at. Did you ever feel like nothing in civilian life mattered? Kind of a weird one.

Failure, Resilience, And Moving Forward

Why Security Halt Exists

SPEAKER_01 10:35

I didn't put a lot of stake in preparing for my transition, like before I went through my my journey, my crisis, my downfall, if you will. So yeah, I didn't think too much of it because you know I I thought I was gonna be doing 30 plus years. I I was in it for the long haul. So yeah, I I always caution everybody to start thinking about civilian life and transition a lot earlier, a lot sooner than before you're looking at your ETS timeline. It's important. You're gonna transition at some point, you're gonna leave the military at some point. Start working on it. Years, years before you have to actually start preparing for it. That's what makes people very successful in that. Um you always talk about positivity, and that seems easy because you've never failed. Well, actually, that's a that's not a question, that's more of a statement, but that's neither here nor there. I fail all the fucking time. All the time. I kid and I joke that I say that I am a dog shit entrepreneur because I am a dog shit entrepreneur. I didn't go to an I didn't go and get my MBA. Instead of going through a business transition program like Warrior Rising, I went through the Honor Foundation. And the people at the Honor Foundation at the Eglin chapter were amazing individuals. But they didn't have anything directly developed for somebody like myself. And I struggled. I struggled being a business owner. I've had to figure things out, I've had to figure it out on my own, and I have failed numerous times, but not just in business. I fail in life all the time. I fail as a husband, fail as a new dad. I don't always get it right. And I think that because I have a show that talks about positivity and being the best version of yourself, I'm constantly championing, it gives people the false sense that I am just constantly succeeding at life. Not going to be further from the truth. A lot of the things that I champion, I champion because I need to hear them too. They're things that I echo back to myself. And I'll be completely vulnerable and real with you in this moment. There was a graduate program I wanted to be a part of. Didn't it get didn't get accepted to it? I am a three-time, three-time non-select for the Pat Tolman Scholarship. Um there are so many things that I fail at. I tried putting together a conference and that failed. I don't say this because me. I say this because failure is a part of life. And if at any moment this podcast, my reels, YouTube makes you feel like I am just constantly hitting home runs, that couldn't be further from the truth. I do have successes. But by and large, it's because I I don't quit. I push forward. If I wrote a book today, it was I showed up and I didn't quit. The story of Denny Caballero. I I kept going forward. That doesn't sound interesting, and I would argue that it probably wouldn't be. But when others quit, I keep moving forward. And there's no secret to it. I just get up and I keep going forward. There was tons of jobs that I bid for, or production gigs I bid for that I didn't get. There's tons of opportunities where other people were selected and I wasn't. I don't dwell on it. To actually be quite honest, the one thing that I really wish I would have gotten was the Pat Tillman Scholarship, because I wanted that. I felt that I did a lot of good things, working with nonprofits, volunteering. They didn't pan out. And that sucked. But that's life. And I'm choosing to share that with you because I got a feeling that you probably fail. If you're willing to send that statement, it means that you're probably going through a shitty time. And I will tell you right now, shitty times are important because it gives us the moment of reflecting back to saying, like, wow, man, look at all those years, all the all the times I had my my best, the best people submit all that paperwork and all those letters on my behalf, and it turned out to not to nothing. I've not done nothing. But in a few years from now, in a few months from now, I guarantee I will look back and say, and I already have. I've been able to say, like, you know what? If that opportunity came, it would have meant that I wouldn't have been able to do this or this or that. So yeah, I fail. I fail all the fucking time, but I don't dwell on it. And I found that when I do, when I ruminate, when I stay in there, makes things worse. Fail fast. There's gonna be a lot of other things in life that I don't do well. There's gonna be a lot of opportunities I don't succeed in. But I'm not gonna fucking sit there and dwell on it. I'm gonna move forward. Because in my lived experience, that's what helped me be more successful is when I picked up, got off my ass, and continued moving forward. I didn't quit. So yeah. If you're sucking right now, if it cost you pain to see me or the perception that I have never failed in life, well, I'm I'm I'm here to tell you. I'm right there with you. I failed. We all do. Uh, and if there's people out there that don't, then hey, good for them. But that's not me, and that's not you, and we gotta work a little bit harder. All right. Next question. Why did you start Security Halt? Well, I guess you must be a brand new listener. Because this whole thing started to help you, to help me and to help my friends. It all started way back in the day with me, Paul, and Greg. Three friends who struggled and were going through some difficult times. And we thought that maybe if we talked about it, maybe if we were a little bit vulnerable with a little bit of, you know, nerd Star Wars jokes and some poop and cum joke humor, we could help others stay around a little longer. And along the way, show grew, found an audience, and Greg and Paul found their own things. And the show definitely found a different, you know, went a different way. And that's okay. But we started it with the idea of helping you, the audience, understand that you weren't alone, that the things you were experiencing were by and large a normal veteran experience or law enforcement officer experience or first responder experience, that you weren't alone in this echo chamber. There was others like you. And we just aimed at making you laugh and then giving you a couple resources. So that's why it started. You know, it shifted and grown from that. And uh, but I like to think that it's still the essence is still there. I want to make you laugh through social media interactions, the things I post. And I want you to think. I want you to sit down and listen to an interesting conversation between two individuals, specialists that I bring on, or a guest with a live experience similar to mine, highlighting some of the things that we've all experienced in our life and our time in the service, our time as civilians, or in the between.

SPEAKER_00 18:27

So, yeah, that's why I created it. What keeps you motivated?

What Keeps Denny Motivated

A Message To Every Service Member

SPEAKER_01 18:34

Well, uh your messages, your your emails saying that you got help, that you found or utilize a resource that I highlighted, that um you chose to stay versus uh early checkout. That's what motivates me. That's what hypes me up. That when this show is able to reach somebody that I knew or somebody that we had crossed paths and they reach out, man, that gets me going too. But knowing that it's helping somebody, that's really what it's for. That's really what motivates me. That's what gets me out of bed at 3 a.m. to do the things I need to so I can get back in the studio so I can record. That's what motivates me. If you could speak to every service member that's struggling right now, what would you say? I think the biggest thing I I'd like to say to anybody out there wearing a uniform is number one, I'm proud of you.

SPEAKER_00 19:39

It's never been harder. And I know we're not in a time of war, technically.

SPEAKER_01 19:46

But it's harder now, I think, because the world's full of people telling you that you can have a life of great pleasure and ease, free of difficulty.

SPEAKER_00 20:03

Yet you're choosing to serve. You're choosing to put on the uniform and be of service to your nation.

SPEAKER_01 20:12

I'm absolutely proud of you. And I think that no matter what you face today or tomorrow or in the coming years, know that you're going to be prepared for it. Know that when the time calls for you to do your job, to do your mission, you're going to execute flawlessly. And I certainly hope that when you finally take off the uniform for the last time and you exit, you do so with confidence and knowing that you did your job to the best of your ability. And now you're embarking on the next chapter, which is going to be even greater. I want every service member to know the military is an amazing, amazing thing. But it's a footnote. It's a small chapter to the greater story that you're about to experience. So I will tell you enjoy it, be present, understand that it is a small, small but powerful chapter in your life. And you're bound for some amazing things. Just have to understand that you know might be going through some tough times at one point. But services like surfing, man, it's waves. You can have some good sets, you can have some bad ones.

SPEAKER_00 21:42

Just know you're gonna have better days than bad ones. Keep pushing through it. And if you can, please go to a selection process.

SPEAKER_01 21:55

Challenge yourself while you're young, whether it's going to SF. Going to civil affairs, going to PsyOps, whatever it is. Challenge yourself while you're young. Be willing to try something difficult. That's what I'd like to say.

Vision For Security Halt’s Future

SPEAKER_00 22:11

All right, we got room for one more question. Alright, let's see. Let's make it a good one. Well, okay. All right, here's here's a light one. This is this is a good one. Where do you see Security Hall going in the next few years?

SPEAKER_01 23:25

Well, I am finally to a point where I feel like I've I can bring more people on board. I want to launch more shows. I want to bring back ILG. I want to have shows where I riff. I want to have more shows in different categories. But security all is still my number one thing. And what I want to do with this show is grow it to as big of a platform as I can advocate for a different type of veteran mentality. I'm sick of the narrative of the broken PTSD riddled veteran that's angry at the world and angry at society. We're more than that. I don't want that to be how our nation remembers our GWAP veterans. I want the perspective to change. I want the American people to see the GWAP veteran as somebody that is capable of overcoming, as someone that can heal, as somebody that is a champion for others. And I know I can't do that on my own, but damn it if I'm not willing to try. When others just want to continue putting out the same content, highlighting the pitfalls of you name the operator of the month. I want to create something that's worthwhile, something that's positive. I know it's hard to sell positivity, but I'm in it for the long haul. I want to try to change the narrative. I want to try to highlight voices and stories that matter that can help other people. That's what I see for Security Halt and for Security Halt media. Growing, adapting, new shows. Some that are most more focused on humor, some that are in complete different genres. And I'm working that right now. It's a lot of work. But at the end of the day, I'm my own boss. And that's crazy to think. Crazy to think that we're here at 2026 and I'm doing this for a living.

SPEAKER_00 25:43

That's insane. That goes for full circle to that transition, all the transition questions.

How To Support And Stay Connected

SPEAKER_01 25:54

When others aren't willing to bet on you, just bet on yourself. There's going to be a lot of failure. There's going to be a lot of missed opportunities. There's going to be a closed doors. But I'm telling you, if you just don't quit and you're willing to try, you can succeed. And I definitely don't feel like I'm succeeding. But at least I'm not failing at everything. At least I'm getting 1% better each and every day. That's what I can say. There's a lot of work to do. Appreciate you all taking the time to send these questions. Keep them coming my way. Send them on Instagram or send them to me by email at sechoppodcast at gmail.com. And know that I will get to them. I'll try and make it more of a weekly thing because I have got a backlog of these. I've got to get them out. Some of these questions are good. I think it's important to communicate with you guys and let you know that I'm human. And this whole thing is still built on poop and cum jokes. That's it. That's that's the whole thing is still just team room humor. And boy, I'm I'm honored and privileged to be able to do this. So do me a favor, head on over to the episode description. Support our sponsors. And if you want to sponsor the show, get with me. Connect with me on Instagram or secoppodcastgma.com. We have a lot of great stuff to offer. I think we've got some great downloads, some great metrics on social media. We're only continuing to grow. So I'm not going anywhere. If you still like the show, continue to follow and do me one big favor. Leave me a little review. Head on over to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Help a brother out. Don't have to be anything huge. Five stars and a few words means a lot to me. I'm Denny Caballero. This has been Security Hall answering your questions, and we'll see you all next time. Till then, take care.