You can't connect deeply to a God you fear. Bhagavan suggested that there are two paths to awakening, Spiritual practices or simply praying to God to do the work and awaken you. For you to ask God to awaken you, you have to be able to connect to that God. Since God is infinite, God can be seen in a way that bypasses your psychology. So if you love women and are afraid of men, have a female God. The growth formula, prayer, gods, etc are discussed. I think this podcast will make a lot more sense once you have listened to it than it likely does now. See what you think.