117 - You're Shining Always, Living with a Narcissist - Q & A

This is a recording of a Live Q & A which has been edited for clarity, length, and helpfulness. Great Q & A! Your Being is Always shining as Love, Peace, and Fulfillment.  Sometimes we are either too distracted or possibly too blocked by our repressed pain to experience our Selves.  "I'm Awakened" and don't want to be entangled by too much information.  What to do?  "I live with a Narcissist."  Etc....
Though I am a psychotherapist and these podcasts are offered to be spiritually helpful, they are not psychotherapy.  If psychotherapy is ever needed, please reach out to a psychotherapist. 

These podcasts are here to support your personal path of awakening whatever that might be. I feel they are most powerful when listened to in sequence from podcast one forward because each is built on the last. Though they, also, all stand on their own. If anything does not resonate, please disregard it and follow your heart. All my podcasts and website are free. Enjoy!

Though I am a psychotherapist, and these podcasts are offered to be spiritually helpful, they are not psychotherapy. If psychotherapy is ever needed, please reach out to a psychotherapist.

www.williamecooper.wordpress.com for more support. You may, especially, enjoy the short contemplations and the resource page which gives you some supportive material.

Transcript

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Hello, everybody. Welcome. Welcome, everybody. How are you doing? I trust well. Let's see some of my friends. Good to see you. My name is William Cooper and this is Awakening Together Relaxing Into Happiness, our podcast. And today we're going to do questions and answers. Hi, Nancy. If you have any questions about your spiritual path, whatever it might be, ask, and we'll talk about it. I would like to say something while you're thinking about your questions. And to me, it's quite comforting, which is you really don't have to do anything to be just fine. Your innate being is perfect. It's always here. It's always shining. It's just as strong and as loving and as bright as Buddha's inner nature, as Jesus, Ramana, anybody on the spiritual path. It's intact. There's nothing you have to do to make it. So it's already that way. It's a bright, bright light. And it feels that way, like boom, a bright light. And that bright light is the first impulse, the first bit of creation, when that which is infinite, which you come from, when that comes into creation, it turns into a bright light. But you also track that backwards and you're beyond creation. And it's a very full feeling. It's a full feeling of nothingness, you might say. I'll take a moment. Hi, Laura. Hi, Blossom, Violet, Cindy, Monica. Good to see you all. But you're that bright light. Nothing you have to do. Well, then how come, you know, life is tough at times. And how come we don't always feel that bright light? What are the qualities of the bright light, by the way? The qualities of you, their love, their peace, their wellbeing, fulfillment. This is you all the time, all the time. So why don't we always feel that? Well, there's two general reasons. And we've talked about this before, but it gives us a place to start today. And those two general reasons why we don't feel who we always are is either we're distracted from ourselves and distractions separate us from ourselves. We could be distracted in our thoughts, lost in our thoughts, lost in our emotions. We could be hypnotized. That's what hypnosis is. It's when you're focused on a suggestion, you take it really to heart, and you believe it's true. I am a monkey. I am a chicken. I am whatever the suggestion says. I am angry. I am, but your nature isn't anger. It's a hypnosis. I am hurt. I am afraid. We definitely feel these things, but they're not who we are. So we can be distracted away from ourselves so completely that we don't feel ourselves that much. The other reason, the number two general reason why we might not feel ourselves is because we've created a tension that more or less walls us off from ourselves. It separates us from ourselves. This tension, that tension can be made out of emotion. The tension could be made out of hurt, fear, anger. It might just be a numbness. So in these two ways, primarily we separate ourselves from ourselves, from our bright light. And this bright light is not a theory. It's not a philosophy. It's a direct experience. And you all feel it. And I, I apologize for telling you what you likely already know, but you know, we're just having to start our discussion. So I am talking about these things, but the bright light that you are, peace, wellbeing, wonder, gratitude, happiness, that's always there. And you feel it, for instance, it breaks through when you see a sunset, perhaps, or you're with a loved one, or you see some, something in nature, the Grand Canyon, or you're in, um, in the forest and you feel so peaceful or at the beach, those feelings that you feel, you're feeling yourself. It's the artwork opens you up or the music opens you up or the sunset opens you up or nature resonates and you open up, open up to what open up to yourself. So what you love about nature is you, what you love about love is you, what you love about peace is you. So that is your nature. Another way to know your nature is when you meditate. At first, meditation is very difficult because when you sit still, you're releasing all of your blocks. It's hard to repress things when you meditate. So all that you stuck under because it was so painful releases. So then you don't feel good when you meditate. And our first defense against feeling all this repressed material coming up is just go up into our minds and think. So our minds will probably race, or we might start feeling fidgety or that we want to move around because we're releasing so much. And the beauty of meditation, if you just sit still for the allotted amount, amount of time, you can't keep repressing things and you can't once again, distract yourselves into separation because you're stuck there. And the tensions or the blocks, they start to unwind and unravel and release. Problem with meditation is it hurts often. You hear about it being peaceful and it is once you release all of the things that have been troubling you. And once you release all the things that have been troubling you, guess what? You're awake. So meditation is a slow process of releasing, and it's very powerful. And there are many other powerful ways to release, to come back to yourself. And you may have your own, you may have your own process that works for you now. And what I've discovered is as I have moved into different parts of my life, different processes work better than others. Sometimes psychotherapy could be good for some people at some time. Other times meditation, other times exercise, other times walking in nature, often doing all of those things at the same time. Kim asks at making an observation or asking a question, it looks like. Kim says, in the past year, I have experienced a great deal of space, quote unquote space, people moving away, death, favorite things ending, any idea about this type of space in relation to awakening practice? Well, Kim, I'm, I'm wanting to understand the space a little bit better. You're saying you are, you have more room in your life because people have moved away and there's been death and favorite things ending. Um, that's what I take from it. And my first impulse, I have an idea, but my first impulse is to ask you, Kim, what does it feel like to you to have this space? Now this new space, what does it feel like to you? What's going on? Ah, very good. Kim says it feels like it is purposeful. Well, that's what was coming to me also, Kim. Um, I didn't want to, I want to be careful on those kinds of questions, not to put words in your mouth, but embedded in awakening and your path of awakening is deep trust. And the universe becomes us as we let go. I started off, let me back up for a second. I started off on this podcast saying that we're a bright light and all the qualities of that light, like healing and love and peace and wellbeing. That's who we are, but we're crusted over either because we're distracting ourselves or because we're under a wall of tension. How do we reverse that? How do we open up? Well, it's just that we take it in, we open up, we relax. The ancient Greek word laxis means to open. It means loosening. It means lots of space. Relax. We open up again, instead of being under these walls. Uh, and also we think clearly instead of being distracted in that what flows through our personality, the part of us that is opening up because our being is perfect. It doesn't need to open up. It's our personality that's opening up. When that opens, when that relaxes, when that takes in, soaks up the wellbeing of our personality embedded in that awakening is trust. And what we find out is that through direct experience, again, not a philosophy, but it's what you feel is that the universe is on your side. You are the universe. And so purposeful, I thought was a great answer. Uh, a great, um, connection to what's going on. You are given space to do a very important thing. And that's whatever your heart calls you to do for deeper awakening. For me right now, it's often to sit still, just to do nothing, to just feel the completeness of who I am. For you, it might be a similar thing as to sit still, or it might be to walk in nature or both or a third thing or a fourth thing. So you're being given a gift, a gift of space, a gift that you can listen in that space to everything that you need, everything that your soul is calling for, your being, your, your opening. And you can do that. Uh, I hope that helps or at least confirms what you're feeling, Kim, because that seems to me pretty, pretty much on target. Uh, if not, or if you want to add something, feel free to. Char says, please ignore. If this is not the correct time to ask, I've recently become awake. I want to learn more, but I feel overwhelmed by the volume of information. That's that's so true. I would like to continue on the enlightened path, but not sure where to find a teacher. Is there a book or a person you would recommend? I apologize as I'm having a hard time finding the correct words to ask my question. Well, Char, that's beautifully said. And you know, it's so correct. Awakening is being present to yourself, just flowing, being present to yourself, not blocking, not distracting, just experiencing yourself fully. And you're connected to everything around you as well. And it happens incrementally. Um, it, it deepens and deepens and deepens. So it doesn't mean that you're connected to everything all at once. Uh, although, um, that, that also can happen. The opposite of awake sometimes is to get lost too much in the mind and get too caught up in information. If you rest in your heart, if you rest in your being, you're fine. But if you get too deep into the weeds, all of these perspectives and, uh, winding roads, it can get very complicated. And next thing you know, your beautiful being is still intact and fine. But sometimes the mind can get twisted around and start to block just because it's so confused. It's read so many things. Uh, and often you find conflicting things. So let me answer your question specifically, and I'll answer it in a number of ways. First is that's exactly what my podcast address. I've also been on the path for first started meditating in 1973 or 72. And, um, I've been down a lot of side roads, read literally over a thousand books, I suppose. Uh, I've done a lot, been to 14 times. I say that only to say I've been down a lot of paths and there's a lot of value in those different paths. But in these podcasts, what I've attempted to do is place only those things that I think are extremely valuable and, um, can point you in a good direction. So you could listen to these podcasts, not in order to awake, but to confirm what you already are experiencing. It might be helpful. And secondly is when somebody else points things out, there might be a pocket inside of you that you haven't looked at before. And though, uh, most awakening, let me put it this way is an ever deepening process. So the more awareness we can put on ourselves, uh, the more opening and deepening can happen. So it's good to listen to clear teachings. And I think these podcasts of mine for the most part are pretty clear. You can go to insight timer and you can just search for William Cooper. If you're interested, you can follow me and you'll be notified when I do new podcasts, but also when I do these, um, programs, these live question and answers. And I have over a hundred podcasts. I would just start with number one and move forward at your leisure. Or if you see a topic that really calls to you one in the title, just listen to those podcasts. Also around podcast number 90, I have one called awakening books. And those are books that I have found to be helpful and clarifying. So that might answer your book question and, um, person. Um, I in later one, a later podcast, I list a whole bunch of people. I think it's in the title. I'm not sure. Um, but I like Michael Singer in, uh, he's in Florida. Uh, Eckhart Tolle is of course good. Now, some of these people don't describe things. I like very specifics, like instead of let go of things and you'll feel better. Kind of like what I said in the first part of this podcast, I like to know, okay, how let go of things. How I want to let go, but how, uh, I like specifics you'll find in this series of podcasts, my podcasts that we've talked quite a bit about how it's mostly lots about how. So, um, I haven't addressed it in this particular podcast, but almost every other one I do. Uh, but he's very good. Eckhart Tolle of course is good, but I, I'm not going to say I'll just, depending you're going, you will get something different from each one of these teachers. And there's a whole bunch of other ones. Oh, I don't want to go through them all. Um, let's see, only because it's going to take a lot of time. Look in the title of one of my later podcasts. I start looking at around podcast number 100 and I, and read in the show notes. And I think I list a whole lot of teachers. Well, I know I do. I just can't remember which one, but I would, I would start with, um, Michael Singer. Yes. Uh, and Nancy says, I'm reading Michael Singer's living untethered right now. And yes, all of his stuff is very clear and, um, very helpful. So I would, I would, uh, read those. He has untethered soul. He has, um, the surrender experienced and he has living untethered. And I haven't read that one. I'm pretty much just having my own experience these days. So I'm not reading that much, but his are very good. Uh, Jennifer and I actually, we lived down not so far from him. So we went down and listened to him and I was very impressed. Um, I hope that helps ask another question. That's a great question. Char, ask some more if you'd like. And if I didn't answer that completely, just come circle around and ask me more. Um, let's see. Everybody says, thanks, Kim, for your great question. It is a great question. Uh, the question that Kim asked and, uh, so is shards. Everybody's is. Jennifer says you have a terrific, terrific book list. I've read several. Thanks, William. And thanks for the question. Yes. Thanks. Sure. Okay. Sure. Says I'm now following. I'm now following you now. Thanks so much for your time, the group's time, your wisdom and the information. I look forward to your teachings after the class. Much gratitude. Yeah. Sure. I think you really will like them. These podcasts are the best I've ever heard basically on awakening because they have the how and they've weeded out some things that can get you sidetracked. And I describe what they are in the various podcasts. So I like them, even though I do them with you, I think they are very good. Um, so it is a good, I feel really good directing you that way. Also on inside timer, I would listen to my podcasts because they give you, um, a center and that center basically is you, but I'm highlighting how to know that, which you've, you're already discovering, but I'm throwing light onto it from that center. I would highly encourage. There are so many good teachers on insight timer that I would just, uh, listen a little bit here and there. Okay. The thing I'm trying to say though, is I really believe highly in this series of podcasts. And sometimes if you get too scattered here, there, and yonder, um, it gets a little scattered, but, but there are some very good teachers on, on here. So, uh, uh, Nancy says, uh, I'm reading Michael Singer's book, living untethered. Uh, I didn't know where to begin. That's a good place to begin, Nancy. Oh, which book to begin? Well, Nancy, uh, he wrote them in a series. He wrote untethered soul came out first. That's a good one to start with. If you're, if you're going to have a choice, I would start with one untethered soul or the surrender experiment. He actually published the surrender experiment second and the surrender experiment is about his life. Both of them are, both of those are, and then living untethered, I think is going to give you some practical tips. I think, again, I haven't read that one, but I w I would get all three of those. They're all very good. Len I've listened to almost all of your podcasts here on insight timer and they are fantastic. I listened to them in order. Thanks for continuing to post more. Oh, thank you, Len. That's what I'm saying. I mean, I know it sounds horrible for me to say, yes, my podcast, you should listen to them. They're great. I don't mean it that way. I just mean, they really will guide you in a good direction. And yes, I think, uh, Nancy start with my podcast, number one, and give them a chance. They're short in the beginning. So listen to about the first seven or eight or nine and see what you think. Uh, they just keep on going and they get more and more specific as you go along. They build on each other. Laura says, uh, surrender experiences to surrender to everything, the surrender experiment. What he's saying is, uh, it's kind of what somebody asked me a little earlier. I think it might've been now I'm forgetting, but it might've been Len. You know, the universe, this is a hard thing to know. You can't really know as you open more and more and more. And most of you, many of you know this, but as you open more and more, your trust of the universe, um, is embedded in your opening because it's part of the oneness. I mean, you are the universe. So of course you trust the universe. So when you, um, open and really have a direct experience, and what I mean by that is, you know, you're, you know who you are, at least maybe not. Maybe you're still on your path and you're still unfolding, but you pretty much know who you are. Well, then you pretty much trust the universe. And what Michael Singer is saying in his book, the surrender experiment was that he trusts the process that the universe gives us things in our life. Everything that's happening today in your life is perfect. And what is designed to do is bring up these blocks that I talked about earlier in this podcast. Um, these tensions that we ourselves have developed and embedded them inside of us. And we block ourselves off because they're there and they're made of pain. The universe does something to tease them out, bring them to the surface so that they hurt so that we feel them and that we will no longer repress them, but rather release them in these podcasts. We go through steps on how to release them and I'll go through those briefly. But what he's saying is the surrender experiment is that you're surrendering to the universe and trusting that every day is bringing you what you need for the most important thing in your life. The reason why you're here and that is to awaken, to be your true self, to know yourself truly and completely, to feel your innate happiness fully, to know your, yourself as peace completely. So anything that needs to happen for that to happen, the universe is helping you with that. Even if it seems like it's, it's a horrible experience. Why does it seem that it's a horrible experience? Because it's bringing up our feelings. And how did these feelings get inside? I put them in there. So that's what he's talking about it with the surrender experiment. And boy, did he go through a lot in his life. Uh, it's pretty crazy. Um, I'll just say one thing. Um, I'll say a couple of things, but I don't want to give away the book, but he sat in the middle of the forest. He vowed never to leave. I won't give away, but he made hundreds of millions of dollars, did not mean to. He just did. And he was highly persecuted for things he did not do. And I won't say any more than that, but it all you can imagine brought up lots of things in him to work on. So, um, okay. I hope that answers your question. Cindy says, trust your gut girl. You're in a good place. Perfect advice. Blossom says she loves Michael Singer. Yes, he's great. Nancy don't resist the things and don't cling to things, but let experiences go through you. Let go. Surrender also. Yes. You know, life is a very tricky thing. And what you said, Nancy is so true. And that is awakening, opening and trusting. And at the same time, part of that trust is you follow your gut. Like, um, Cindy was saying, and certain things you actually have to close down and protect yourself. And that's called wisdom. Now that's not a way of life because that won't bring you to awakening, but sometimes you have to get out of the pounding surf. Sometimes you have to protect others from yourself when you're not fully awake and you've got all sorts of emotions going and maybe you don't need to inflict others with them. Other times, you just need to take a break. So you don't become overwhelmed. You have to take baby steps. So in so many ways, you both have to be open and let go and let the universe flow. But part of that flowing is sometimes closing just for a little bit. So, um, oh, and when you do open, Laura says, thank you. Even when it, even if it hurts, well, and that's the thing about opening, it almost always hurts because you have to ask yourself, why wasn't I open before if I'm opening now? Well, almost 100% of the time it's because I'm shielding some hurt. Otherwise I would be open. So when I do open, I no longer repress that hurt. It comes out. It starts to release its energy. It spins around. It releases its energy. It looks around. It can begin to update its files, breathe in that. Wow. It had been locked in time. This hurt, you know, I'm hurt because I was abused as a child, but as I'm looking around now, it's okay. I'm not a child anymore. This hurt part is realizing that perhaps for the first time, breathing it in, taking it in, drinking it in, soaking it in. And as it does that, it can open and relax and then melt into oneness. So it does hurt as it's releasing this old hurt. It's held. It does hurt. And that's just an example. There's a thousand other examples. All of you are doing so well. And I will say this, any practice that you're doing is a good practice. The very fact that you show up every day and do something or every week and do something assures the outcome that in your time, you will awaken. That's why you're doing these things. That's why you're listening to this kind of information, because something inside of you is being guided to listen. You will awake. It might not seem like it for some of you. I remember I was so covered up with pain and trouble that I never thought it was. I mean, I had high hopes. I had wishes, but I had doubts too. You're doing great. And I'm glad you're all here. And Nancy, I'm glad you're learning about all this. Same with Char and Laura and everybody else. Jennifer says, Edgar Cayce, There is a River is amazing, beautiful, and also suggested by William Mead. That is a good book. And then Yogananda's book, maybe many of you have read it, Autobiography of a Yogi is a good book. It seems farfetched perhaps, but in my experience in India, it's seems like it could be true. At least maybe all of it. I don't know. Paul Brenton wrote a book that Jennifer's talking about here called In Search of Secret India. That is the closest book that I've ever read that coincides with my experiences in India. So short of going to India, I would read that book. And again, all of these are in that podcast. I around 90. It's titled Books that Awaken. In that book, In Search of Secret India, this newspaper reporter goes to India and it's Paul Brenton. And it's his biography. And the reason he goes to India is because he wants to see, is there anything to these gurus? Do they really exist? Can you trust them? What are they good for? What can they do? What can't they do? Can they do anything? I also went to India looking for that too, in many respects. Although I had some powerful experiences before I ever got there. And in the bottom line, I will tell you this, gurus, everything you've read is pretty much true about gurus. They are very powerful. They might not emotionally be completely mature, some of them. So that's why you see them go off the deep end every so often. And I don't think gurus can give you awakening, but it's a little confusing because for 10 years, I had a guru that projected his awakening through me. And it sure did feel like I was awake, powerfully awake because he was mega powerfully awake. So I learned a lot about awakening through his energy. But in the end, I had to back up, start again and walk down my own path. So we talk about all that in these podcasts. There's all these little twists and turns, but I think In Search of a Secret India is a great book. Okay. What other questions do you have for me or for us? While you're thinking of a thought or a question, I'll say this, that as we go through different stages of our life, different things are very, very valuable. And my friend, Bob, a very awakened man said, you know, sometimes you have to get out of the pounding surf, especially in the beginning. If your nervous system is so overwhelmed and you've got so many things going on that you can't even, you can barely get through the day. Sometimes you just have to take care of yourself. That might be the first step of awakening. Listening to a guided meditation where you can relax, relax your nervous system could be invaluable. Walking in nature and connecting can be invaluable on these first steps. But of course, even on steps way down the line, these can be very valuable things to do. Exercise, eating well, getting enough sleep, meditating, do what you can every day. Don't overdo it. Because in the release of all this repressed material, it can be overwhelming and it can wear you out. And then you think I can't meditate. I don't like it. I'm no good at this. It's not peaceful. It's not my way. No, if you, if it is, if you do have your thoughts going all over the place and it is painful, you are likely meditating in the correct way. You're just releasing a lot of stuff that's been embedded inside of you. So get out of the pounding surf is a good first step. I know a lot of you are way down the line and awakened. I mean, as we've already talked about, but some of you are just starting out and, or somewhere in the middle. So it's so important to be nice to yourself. I mean, you are love. We are love. So we want to be nice. Sometimes being nice is taking a break from this awakening business. Take a break, you know, take it easy. What's the hurry? You're going to get there. What is time? You're going to get there. The universe has your back. You are the universe. If there's anything to this awakening stuff. And I'll tell you right now, a preview, my direct experiences, everything I'm saying I'm experiencing. So I'll tell you ahead of time. It's true. Everything you've heard about awakening, it's true. So I'll just in, I'll give you the ending. It's true. Being true. I'll tell you this, that it's all going to work out. The universe is you, and it's not going to leave itself high and dry. You're okay. But that intent that you have to be your whole self, to be happy, to be full, that intent that you have to be out of pain, to be clear, to have a good life, that intent, that is your coming from your true self. And it's just saying, let's clean up some of this old mess so that we can shine, glow. So Laura asked, is there a meaning to life? Yes. There's many meanings to life. I did a podcast on that by the way, probably called the meaning of life. And it's one of the later ones. It's probably around 90 in the nineties or eighties. I point that out because it's available. I go through a lot of different angles on that. The bottom line, and really there are a lot of, because we exist through lots of different realities, all at the same time, there's lots of different answers because we're not a one dimensional being. So to answer that question simply misses the point of who you are, of who I am. So I don't want to, in the space that we have here, I would just direct you to listen to that podcast, but let me just say something here. So somebody's listening in, they get something out of this. The bottom line is joy. You are joy. You are creative, joy, peace, and love. That's who you are. Vibrantly. You're vibrant bliss. You're a bright light and the qualities of that bright light are peace, love, joy. And that sounds, when you put words on it, it dampens it, but it's like an explosion. That's who you are. And to just enjoy that. And we all do. You don't, another trick about awakening is you don't have to wait until quote unquote, you are awake, you know, the day I am awake. Now I'll keep working at it until one day I become quote unquote awake. No, you're awake now to the degree you feel who you are, that you experience who you are and you don't have to experience everything that you are all at once. But when you walk in nature and you feel good, that feeling good is your being. And when you're fully awake, fully clear, you'll still feel that same feeling when you walk through nature. That is awake. There's just also some other stuff clouding us up. And until we release it, until we deconstruct it, it will fog us up some. So we won't have a complete experience, but we are having an experience. And so what I'm pointing to is don't wait till later experience. Now, the joy that you are when people have gratitude journals, they can only write down gratitude because they have already received this goodness. They can say, well, I felt grateful because whatever it is, and that thing that happened felt good. Why did it feel good? Because they're, that's what their being feels like. And that event opened a conduit, for instance, that now in the wake state, you're always open. There's nothing that has to open you. But in life, sometimes things do open us. So we take certain opportunities to open. The point is that goodness that we feel is the same goodness. There is no difference between that goodness and fully awake goodness. There's only one goodness. So the meaning of life, one of the deepest meanings, I'd say the deepest is to discover who you are and enjoy yourself. Yeah, just enjoy yourself. And you can start that right now and then expand on it. Cindy says self-care is important. It is very important. Melody, what do you do in a situation where you come from a narcissistic family system? Well, it really drives you inside Melody. That is a good question. And it's, I understand that question. You really have to meditate. You have to exercise. You have to find yourself very deeply and stick with you. Yes, you can reach out to the narcissist. Some, if you, I mean, if it's your mother or father or whoever, but they're going to be doing all sorts of things to reflect onto you that you're not worth very much and you are everything. That's why sitting still, discovering yourself deeply, it will drive you to awakening. And so it's not a bad thing, but until, and I'm, and you're here today, so I know you're already working on this quite a bit, but I would listen to these podcasts or some other good podcasts and make sure you have a practice where you know yourself. And I don't mean intellectually, I mean, direct experience. You experience yourself, the joy of you. It's kind of the same thing as what is the meaning of life because a narcissist will constantly radiate towards you information non-verbally and also verbally that the meaning of life is them and not you. You don't have any meaning except to serve them. Right? So to listen to them, to listen to their stories, to do all the things, but you have to listen to yourself. And when you hear something over and over and over, that's one of the ways you can deeply condition people by telling them something over and over and over and over and over. And, um, that is a way. And when you have a family member that keeps relating to you in a certain way, over and over and over and over, you become deeply conditioned to believe you're not worth anything or you're not worth much or. So you've just absorbed thoughts and conditioning. It's not real. It just seems real, but you can let it go. You can let it dissolve. Good to know. We talk about that in an early podcast and how we receive suggestions. So if you haven't listened to these podcasts, I would, I would listen. Um, start at the beginning. We'll get there. We go through all this stuff. Uh, but it's a fantastic question. Melody Char, I'm finding everything starts and ends with compassion. Yeah. With compassion. Yes. Char, such a good comment. Yes. Because who are you? Who am I? Compassion. That's our nature. So of course it starts and everybody we connect to is only in compassion. Short of that, it just reflects areas that were not awake. As I say, it's ever deepening our awakening, but life will show us that's what, um, the surrender experiment is. Life will show us where we're not awake. If we don't have compassion, we can start to wonder, Oh, not, Oh, in a bad way, but Oh, let me look. How am I blocking myself? And let's see. Cindy says, Char, I'm an empath who was raised by a narcissistic mother. Thank you, Cindy. Yes. That's the positive. Uh, you get very sensitive. I mean, it's tough, man. But look at knocked off a lot of, uh, crust and look how clear you are. Cindy, you can really feel things. Uh, you know, things. Uh, so again, the surrender experiment life brings us what seems to be difficult and is very difficult, but there's a blessing in the midst of it all. Nancy, I took a self-love course here. Plus I definitely practice self-care. Great. That's so important. Again, I want to emphasize we embody so many different realities and each comment that everybody's making is so appropriate and it's touching somebody or many of us on one of our realities. And so there's many answers to us because we are like a rainbow, lots of colors and different parts of us need different answers. Blossom says, this is a great podcast. Thank you, William. Thank you, Blossom. Oh, Blossom. If you get a chance, Google search Blossom on insight timer. She's got some beautiful, uh, music that flows from her awakened being. You might want to listen. It's, it's really nice. Cindy, uh, research it, understand it, but setting healthy boundaries for you. Yes. Healthy boundaries. So important. And you know, when you're raised by a narcissist, you don't really learn about boundaries. They're not going to teach you about boundaries. You don't even, I mean, you've heard the word many of us. I don't know. You may know all about boundaries, but I would just be aware that sometimes the problem in future relationships, when you've been raised by a narcissist or even with yourself or others is that you don't know how to even state boundaries in a clear yet nice way. So it's not that hard, but at first it takes some getting used to, um, boundaries are so important. Cindy, don't let anybody snuff out your light. Yeah. And it is a journey. Laura says, thank you. William needed to hear that joy, love, peace. Nice. Yes, Laura. That's we are. I can promise you anybody that doesn't feel that right now. And, and life is designed for us not to feel that in some ways. Why is that? Because it's designed to bring up the crust that's blocking us so we can see it. And we can't see it unless we know something's not right. Why aren't I feeling that I am love, joy, and peace? Why what's going on? How do I find out? Maybe I'll sit still that's called meditation. Maybe I'll listen to these kinds of podcasts because podcasts like this throw awareness, throw light towards each of us so we can listen to them and just wonder. And in that wondering, we reveal areas that are ready to let go, ready to release and ready to relax, to reinstate our openness, our flow. Blossom says, I can relate about family members. I opened up to that person. I was told I was weak. So I set boundaries, took courage to say, no, I still love this person very much. Yes. Such a good comment, Blossom. And yeah, you can love these people. You do love these people. The love doesn't go. You are love, right? We are love. So we love these people. But setting up boundaries is because you love you also. And it is hard at first. And they do say nasty things. These people can say nasty things. Oh my goodness. Because they don't want you to change because you've been serving them all their life. They don't think this out consciously, but it just doesn't feel good. Like what's going on? They feel out of place. So they strike back. Baby steps. Don't overwhelm yourself. Don't think I've got to do it the right way and I've got to do everything just perfectly. Just take a baby step. Move in a good direction and keep doing a little something every day if you can. And if you can't do it every day, do it every other day. You'll get there. Cindy says, I've come a long way with it. Enjoy helping and supporting others as well. You know, people who have been through things can help others so deeply. So that's another blessing going through things. Blossom says, thank you, William. You know what? Thank you, everybody. You're all jewels. You're all bright lights. If there's any part of you somehow that doesn't feel how beautiful you are and how bright and loving you are, let's just begin to start to release those blocks, those distractions. Step at a time. Baby steps will get you there. Please listen to these podcasts, mine or somebody else's that lays it out step by step. I think you'll find it helpful. I'm passing on what's been given to me, so I'm no genius. I just have shown up every day, just like you. Okay. Thanks so much. Thank you, Laura. And I enjoy seeing you all so much. Thank you, everybody. Take care. Bye-bye.