145 Self Care, Awakening, Trust vs Wisdom, Etc - Q & A

This is a recording of a Live Q & A which has been edited for clarity, length, and helpfulness. Topics discussed include: Kindness and self care, Hurry Sickness, triggered by family, gratitude journaling, Lack of trust is directly proportional to separation from Self, Awareness of Awareness, loneliness and codependency, teaching children self trust vs wisdom in a dangerous world, letting go, is productivity easier when we are anxious?, etc

These podcasts are here to support your personal path of awakening whatever that might be. I feel they are most powerful when listened to in sequence from podcast one forward because each is built on the last. Though they, also, all stand on their own. If anything does not resonate, please disregard it and follow your heart. All my podcasts and website are free. Enjoy!

Though I am a psychotherapist, and these podcasts are offered to be spiritually helpful, they are not psychotherapy. If psychotherapy is ever needed, please reach out to a psychotherapist.

www.williamecooper.wordpress.com for more support. You may, especially, enjoy the short contemplations and the resource page which gives you some supportive material.

Transcript

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Hello everybody. This is William Cooper. Welcome to Awakening Together, Relaxing into Happiness. I trust you're doing well this week. It's good to see you. Hello. In these live sessions, what really powers them, what really gives them power, is your questions. That guides our discussion, so if you have any questions at all on your path of awakening or where you are in life, regardless of what your path is, please ask them and it will begin our discussion, which will evolve as we go along. Welcome to any new people too. So, while you're thinking about your questions or typing them in, this can be a very stressful time of the year, the holidays. So much going on, maybe family dynamics, maybe the stress of getting things ready for the holidays. So many different things, unmet expectations, and sometimes in the midst of that stress, we're just looking for a simple way to take a breath, to relax, to find our center again. So, I'll start today with just saying there are some simple things you can do, even if you feel overwhelmed or very stressed out. You can remember to do some things that you may already be doing. Take a walk or be in nature, connect to nature, say hi to somebody, talk to a friend, smile, just smile. Very powerful to opening you up. And what do all these simple things have in common? And you probably have many more that you can suggest. They all come from a good place inside of us. It's a good connection, a place of peace and love and wellbeing. As you know, your being, the qualities of your being is love, peace, wellbeing, happiness, and joy. Everything else that's not that is not you. And the path of awakening is letting all that other stuff go. So, if you ever feel, even on a stressful day, if you feel some peace somewhere, putting awareness on awareness is very powerful, both for the present moment and also for your path of awakening. So, if you put your attention on peace, if you feel it anywhere inside of you and imagine for a moment what it would be like if everything else disappeared and just let that peace be there. Let it be the main focus for a moment. Let's say you don't feel peace, but for some reason you feel love. Put your attention on that love. There's only one love. Everything else, the stress, the tension, overthinking, personal interactions, old habits, all of that will melt away eventually. So, it's a good practice to begin to feel into what will it feel like when all that other stuff does melt away. All that will be left is that love. So, put your attention on the love and just let it be okay to imagine that everything else melts away and experience. What does that feel like? Or happiness. Maybe you're going through your day and you just feel happy. Let everything else melt away other than the happiness. Gratitude. One of the qualities of your being is joy. And one component of that is gratitude. So, imagine that everything else melts away except for the gratitude. All the tension melts away, all the stress. Imagine it melting away and just let it and feel what that feels like. Put your attention on your awareness and all of the qualities of your awareness, whichever one is showing itself at the moment. One of the good things about walking in nature is nature doesn't think. It just exudes qualities of being and you begin to resonate with those qualities of being. So, if you're walking in nature, perhaps you'll feel yourself as light or love or wellbeing or peace or happiness. Perhaps you'll feel one or more of these qualities emerge as you walk in nature. Picture everything else disappearing. And this might be a good time to have a mantra. For instance, if you're feeling peace, you might just slowly say to yourself, when it helps, peace and let everything else go. Peace and let everything else go. Say the mantra that resonates with what you're actually feeling. Peace. Or if it's light, you just feel yourself as light as you walk through nature. Just say to yourself, light and keep your attention on that light or love or wellbeing. These are very simple things to do, but it helps to put your awareness on your awareness and let everything else go. Another simple practice that we've talked about a lot is meditation. Every day, meditating, sitting still and letting, because you are sitting still, whatever comes up, let it come up, let it flow. The part of you that's watching what comes up is awareness. So you could put your attention on your awareness when you meditate. What am I like? Because all the stuff that's coming up will disappear eventually. All the thoughts will eventually change or disappear. All of the energy coming out and expending itself and melting will eventually disappear. So none of that's you because you'll still be here. You're watching it disappear. Who are you? The one watching. It's a very subtle thing because you'll notice as you watch, the awareness often doesn't feel like anything at first. So put your attention there and get to know yourself. It's subtle. And as you put your attention there, you might have various experiences. You might experience yourself eventually as light, eventually as happiness, eventually as wellbeing. You might feel it right off, but oftentimes we're so used to being captured by our thoughts that it's a bit of a process. We have to let our thoughts melt away some before we quit being captured by them. You know, in Buddhism, one of the three jewels is take refuge in the Buddha. That is just rest in your beingness because your being is quite safe. It's happiness, it's wellbeing, and all this stuff going on outside and around us often is not that. So take refuge in the Buddha. But often what we do is instead we take refuge in our thoughts. That's what we're trained to do, right? We go to school. Thoughts are powerful tools. They are helpful, but we can get lost in them. And when I take refuge in my thoughts, I am captured by them. And that's the problem. Then I don't see myself anymore. Jesus said to be in the world. So that's using thoughts, that's talking to people, that's having habits, be in the world, but not of it. Which means he was taking refuge in his Buddha nature. If we want to put it in Buddhist terms. In Christian terms, he and the father are one. He's taking refuge in his being, in the infinite. So that's what we can do on a simple walk. Another thing we could do that's a very simple, perhaps you already do it, is a gratitude journal. It's like a mantra. It brings your attention back to the wellbeing that is you, instead of all these thoughts and perspectives that are not you. A very simple way to do a gratitude journal, and there's many, many different ways, but a simple way is take, say, three things that you've been grateful for during the day that happened. For instance, today I went on a walk and I saw a white squirrel. I have never seen a white squirrel before. Pure white. That would be in my gratitude journal. I saw a white squirrel. When I think about it, I feel good. And that's the point. It brings you to your true nature, goodness. You feel good. So three things you would write down by the end of the day, three things that were good today, where you felt good, that you are grateful for. And just reminisce on them. Think on them. That goodness that comes up, there is only one goodness and that is your being. So it's kind of a trick, but it helps all the stuff that's been obscuring the truth of your being, worry and hurt and stress, things like that. It helps that part for a minute and it brings you back to your being. The sun that's shining behind all the clouds comes out, the qualities of your being. You could read your gratitude journal in the morning, the three things that you wrote the day before and let your sun come out. So I know you have many things that you like to do, but the point of this is they're all like mantras in a sense. They bring us back to our center. Now in the big picture, as you do the meditations, for any of you that are new, so far we have over 140 of these podcasts. They're free and they're available to all of you. And I'm bringing it up now because I feel like the most powerful way to listen to these podcasts is to start with podcast number one and work your way forward. Because step by step, each podcast builds on the last and they bring your attention and awareness to perhaps things you're already doing that could deepen or perhaps things you haven't considered before that can help you also deepen and open. So these podcasts can be very powerful and I would highly recommend them. In those podcasts, the reason that I'm bringing them up now is because we talk about how to go even deeper and that is the how, how to let go of what is obstructing us. What I've just talked about is sort of how to pop the bubble of delusion for a second and reconnect to our wellness, our inner being by doing these simple things. But it doesn't really dissolve things that I've constructed that are blocking me that I've repressed and put inside of me. So the next day until I deconstruct that which I formerly constructed, it still remains inside of me. Have you noticed you could write gratitude journals for years, but every day you're overcoming the stress that's still within you. So in these podcasts, we're talking about how to let this melt away these obstructions, many different ways to let them actually melt. What are the mechanics of them? What are they doing there? How do we let them melt? And once they have melted or as they are melted, you'll find on the deeper levels, and perhaps you've already found this, that at first, one thing melts at a time. It's almost one thing at a time. One thing comes up, it expends its energy, it melts, you sit with it, it releases the attitude that's holding it together, which is typically hurt, fear, anger, something like that. We don't repress happiness that much. These obstacles are mainly repressed, hurt, fear and anger, or anxiety, some derivative of all these things, guilt, shame. So as they come up and melt, generally they start with one thing at a time, but as more and more melt, the speed might pick up because you have more internal space, more bandwidth, so to speak. So maybe two melt at a time and then maybe three and maybe four. And then what you may be finding now on your path is that suddenly you don't even have to focus on anything much. They're just all coming up at the same time. There's less energy in each one, yet they're all coming up. So the intensity remains the same. And by the way, the intensity of what we might call our pain is really just frozen light. It's what we have frozen. You know how you manifest things, you have a strong intent, focus, you put some effort into it. You visualize what it would feel like to already have this thing completed in your life and you enjoy it. And you work towards that intent or that goal and grace rushes in and does 99% of it. But your focus is the 1%. That's another podcast we talk about in this series of podcasts. But we do the same thing with our pain. Unwittingly, we take free-flowing consciousness, which is joy, peace, and love. We focus, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, or I have a grudge, or you hurt me, or I'm not going to ever forgive you, or I don't know, something. And with intensity, we focus and we take that free-flowing consciousness, everything is made of consciousness, and we squeeze it, we freeze it into a shape, like taking water and freezing it into a sharp edge shape, a shape of a knife, for instance. I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. And then we repress it because that knife hurts and we don't really want to deal with it after a while, if we don't have to. So it's inside of us. And it releases. If we sit still, and we don't refreeze it. And how does it come up to melt and life? Well, life may do something, somebody may cut you off in traffic, you start to feel angry about it. That's the old repressed anger, it comes up. And if you don't get involved in it, and just let it exude its energy, anger, anger, anger. That's the ice cube melting, instead of it exuding cold, which an ice cube would do your frozen thing exudes what it's made of anger, or hurt or fear. Oh, my goodness, I could have been killed. It exudes that. But if you don't refreeze it, you just let it exude its energy. What happens just like what happens with ice, it melts, melts back into water, poof, it's gone. So as we melt deeper and deeper and deeper, there's more space, the intensity of the ice, our inner ice, that hurt that fear that anger, have you ever felt like sometimes very anxious, and it's intense? Well, that's the intensity of your inner light. It's just been shaped into a sharp edge. And that's why it feels like anxiety. So you don't want to get rid of the intensity. That's the power of your being. You're that powerful. You just want to let it all melt back into its original form, which is love, peace and well being. So you let it exude its energy, it's intense. Ow, ow, that hurts, that hurts, it hurts. And then it melts back into its original form, which is consciousness and then adds to your aura of free flowing love, light, well being. So that's the process in a nutshell. And that's what we go through in great detail with these podcasts, the step by step processes and everything else that I found helpful along the way. I've put in these podcasts, hoping they will give you what I didn't have when I first started. And that was some clear guidance. I've tried to put all of my interactions with all gurus I've been with in India or here in the United States, or my personal growth, so on and so forth, into these podcasts. So as this melting happens, your light gets stronger and stronger, there's more room inside, there's more power. And as your light gets stronger, it then radiates further and further out, illuminating any ice that's on the periphery. So even as you feel better, you then hit some more stuff out there. Have you noticed you work on one thing and it melts and it's resolved and now you feel more powerful and then something deeper comes up and then something deeper and then something deeper. Isn't that the process of life? I would say in my opinion, that's what life is about. Two things. Be in touch with who you truly are. Love, peace and well-being. Experiential, direct experience, not philosophical. I mean, you're feeling it. Love, peace and well-being, joy. And the second process of life is to let everything else go. Be in the world, but not of it. Let it go. Somebody asked me, how do you let things go? How do you be in the world, but not of it? It's so easy to be captured by our thoughts. The reason why it's easy to be captured by our thoughts is because we're not feeling who we are. So we want some relief from when you're separated from yourself, you feel pain because you're separate from yourself. So you feel fear, you feel hurt. I'm abandoned. I feel I'm alone in the universe, fear, or angry. This doesn't feel good. I'm separated from myself. I don't feel whole. So when you're separated from yourself, it's easy to want to jump into a thought, take refuge in a thought rather than refuge in the Buddha, because you can't find the Buddha. I can't find the Buddha. So I take refuge in a good thought. Maybe it's not even a good thought. Maybe I start thinking about revenge or getting even or not enjoying myself until I accomplish certain goals at work, postponed gratitude. So I'm not feeling good until I achieve a certain accomplishment. But the problem with that is then I feel good for about five minutes, and then I think of another goal and then another goal. And that's called hurry sickness. So in our culture, we're often off center. And that's how we get attached to things, because we are so far from our center. The thought is more appealing and it distracts me from my pain. If I get lost in a thought, it's like being lost in a movie or a TV show. I forget about my life for a minute. I get lost in my own TV show, my own thoughts. So that's how you get attached to things. The degree of attachment is proportional to the degree of separation from myself. The remedy? Sit still. Look at all the stuff that's separating you from yourself. All these thoughts and fears and emotions, things that, how did they get there? I created that thought. I created that emotion. So let me discreate it. Let me stop doing it. Let me stop making that thought. That thought wouldn't exist unless I continued to make it. So let's let it melt. Let's let it deconstruct. Okay. That's a lot. Do you have any questions? What would be helpful to you? What can we talk about today? Hello everybody. Hi Jennifer. Hey Blossom Violet. Hey Alexandria. Hey Ava. Ruth says degree of attachment is proportional to the degree of separation from yourself. Deep. Thanks Ruth. Yeah. Have you noticed if I am totally feeling myself, experiencing myself, what is that? That's joy, peace, well-being. It's everything I'm looking for, right? Why do I do anything? So that I can feel safe, or so that I can be happy, or so that I can be joyful, or so I can have peace or fulfillment. Well, those happen to be the qualities of me, my being. So if I'm looking to get a job to get that, or get a relationship to get that, or all these other things, that are good things. They really are, of course. But if I'm using those because I don't feel who I am, then I'm going to be really attached to those things. But if I fully feel love, and peace, and well-being, I don't need those things. I only need them to the degree I'm not feeling that already. And that's to the degree that I'm separated from myself. We all experience that. So that's why such simple things, I mean, we are so separated in our culture. So simple things like taking a walk in nature, and just noticing any peace that comes up. That's who I am. And everything that's not that in me, that's the separation. That's why I sit still every day and let some of it burn off and melt. Maybe I talk to a friend, or I'm with my pet, and I feel love. Anything but the love that I feel, maybe it's just a little pocket of love. Everything else is not me. That's why I sit still. Why in meditation do I sit still? Because if I don't sit still, I don't know about you. But if I don't sit still, I'm going to run to the TV and turn it on. Or I'm going to run to the refrigerator and find those cookies. Or eat a pie. I'm going to distract myself somehow. Because who wants to feel obstacles when they melt? Because they exude what freezes them. And it's what freezes consciousness is hurt, fear and anger. And that's what exudes. Just like an ice cube exudes cold, my obstacles exude extreme hurt, fear, anger, anxiety, whatever I made them with. So I don't, who wants to feel that? Nobody. So that's why you sit still. To let it melt. That's why you let the ice cube sit out in the sun so that it'll melt. Thank you, Ruth. Miffy. Hi, Miffy. Welcome. How do I get out of the habit of chasing things? When I get the house, when I get that new coat, it's my habit. Yes, Miffy, it's all of our habits. Thank you for bringing that up. Again, just like Ruth brought up, the degree of my chasing things is also proportional to my separation from myself. It's proportional to my separation and it's a habit. All these things are also a habit. You'll notice even as you awaken deeper and deeper and deeper, sometimes these old habits still exist. That's what habits do until I deconstruct the habit. How do I do that? Again, listen to these podcasts in order, starting with number one and moving forward. They're all free. They're all there for you. They're quite simple, usually, yet they're very powerful step by step on the house. And I'm just saying that I'm going to answer the question, but we get into it in a lot more detail and things don't happen quickly in this world of ours, except for getting a hamburger at the drive-in window. That could be quick. These days, you never know, but it could be. But our inner work, it's not designed to be quick. What happens in this world is the little tiny specks inside of us that separate us from radiant oneness. The little specks are magnified. Everything slows down in this world and they seem like boulders. They seem like icebergs and they are in this world. It's because we shrink down and yet the specks don't shrink. So proportionally, they look like giant icebergs, but that's the point of this world for us to get still and to be able to see the things, the speck in our eye, to be able to see it, to be able to feel it. So the point for all of us, and it's excruciating for me, I know it got to be for you too. It's excruciating to sit still and look at it. That giant iceberg that never seems like it will finish melting. It does, but it doesn't seem like it at first. So the hurry sickness, running to get a new coat, running to get a new car, running to get a new job. If I get this, if I get this, if I get this. Well, what we're looking for is what we're not feeling. We're looking for some safety or some accomplishments so we can feel good and also feel safe or love. Well, if I get money, then I can get a girlfriend. And if I get a girlfriend, then I can get love. But to get money, I need to get a job. So I better not rest. I better get to work. All these are good things, but they keep me so busy. I don't sit still. And if I don't sit still, I can't let that habit melt. I can't even see the habit. It becomes automatic pilot. It's just what I do. Even if I see it, I don't stop it. I just go, oops, I can't stop it. What to do? So we have to sit still. That's the value of meditation. You sit still for 20 minutes or five minutes even. You let the dust settle. Day in, day out, you sit still. And it's the value of walking in nature. And it's the value of taking in a sunset and staying there inside, just staying with it, not darting off in my head about what I'm going to do in the next two seconds. And then the next two seconds. We all do this, Miffy, everybody. The solution we have to, sounds very simple. We have to stop. If we don't stop, we won't stop. Why? Nobody likes to stop because when we stop, again, all of the pain that we've constructed and repressed inside of us comes to the surface, one at a time or all at once, and it feels uncomfortable. So we don't want to stop. We want to keep thinking, thinking, thinking, doing, doing, doing, getting, getting, getting. Because we don't want to feel that pain. And it's that very pain, those frozen icebergs that are separating us from ourselves. We're always there inside. We're like the sun and those icebergs are like clouds going by the sun. Sometimes the clouds are so thick, you can't see the sun, but the sun's there always. We don't have to do anything to be loving or peaceful or joyful. We already are. All we have to do is take refuge there and realize it rather than taking refuge in the clouds or our thoughts. So Miffy, there is a particular podcast and they are more powerful if you listen to them in sequence one, two, three, four, but there is a podcast called hurry sickness that I did. So if you go through my podcasts and just scroll back to when you see that in the title, hurry sickness, I'll talk about that particular phenomena in great detail, but I just have a bit, but if you really want to delve into it, and each of these podcasts do stand independently, they're just more powerful when you do them in sequence. And if I say anything in these podcasts that doesn't resonate, no problem, just disregard it and move on to the next one. And if I say anything that's not complete enough for what you need, just do a search and find somebody that does. I go into things fairly deeply, which is enough for most people, but you know, every topic you could go forever. So thanks Miffy. Great question. I hope I answered it. If I didn't quite get to what you need, circle back around and just ask again, and I'll, we'll spend some more time on it. Ruth, what's the sweet spot where you are one and integrated and have non-attachment, but am not lackadaisical or indifferent or uncaring pendulums abound? Great observation, Ruth and great question. Let's just start because in our culture, the premise is we have to be driven. That's just a cultural thing. It helps us make more cars as workers. It helps us get to work on time. It helps us create more widgets and things. If we fit into what the industrial society wants or the computer society wants or the technological age needs, but let me put it to you this way. Is there any law that I can't be extremely happy and productive? Could I just follow my heart and I just love art. So I become a great artist or I love people. So I become a great psychotherapist or I love meditation. So I become a meditation teacher or a yoga teacher, but I love so much and I'm so happy. And is there any law against that? Or do I have to be miserable to kind of whip myself down the road? Or is it only that I have to be miserable to do things I don't really want to do? But could I be happy and do things I don't want to do just because they serve a function? Like I need to make money to go on a vacation or have a house or I don't really like my job, but it's helpful for now. It's a stepping stone. Also, Ruth, it's such a, all these questions have so much depth and levels to them. It's hard to answer them in one, one shot. But the feeling of lackadaisicalness or indifference, that also is a separating feeling. That's not the qualities of our being. Our qualities of being our joy, light, wellness, peace, happiness, and there's a vibrancy to it. Have you ever felt very happy and excited to wake up in the morning? Maybe you are on vacation or maybe you're in love or maybe something and you're, you can't wait to do. Maybe you've got a project that you just are so excited because it expresses something deeply that you feel it's a creative project. So you can hardly sleep at night. You're so excited. Those are the qualities of your being. That's your being. It's, it's like an explosion. Yes, you can feel your being and great peace, which is silent. The reason why it's so hard to talk about being in a way, it depends on which chakra you're talking about it through certain chakras. You feel great joy or another, like your heart love or another great insight, or so it's the same being the shining through a different opening or a different avenue in your nervous system. But fundamentally you are the power of the universe. So any lackadaisicalness is not the quality of your being. And that would be something you would sit still and let it melt out of your system. Uncaring or indifferent. Those are also not qualities of our being. Again, they are icebergs sit still, and we let them melt out. And this applies again to all human beings, because we're all in the same boat. If you're on this earth, we're all pretty much in the same boat, same song, maybe different verse, but maybe all the same verse a lot of times. So a great question. And I hope that answered it. Some Ruth Alexandria. My question is about family. I am working with the youngest, most hurt parts of me. I am on the way to help my dad for the week to get his property in order. I am doing it for me, not him. I felt that I would regret not doing what I can. I don't know how this is working, but I think it is something about leaning in and melting. I just got in the car and I'm on my way. Oh, okay. Happy journeys. Especially when you work with your family, it brings up old hurt things or blocked things or things that haven't gone well in the past. Even when you're doing it for you, because you know, it's a good thing and it expresses a wholeness inside of you, a place that's whole. It often will bump into anything that is still unresolved. So you will feel both at the same time, the wholeness of doing this good thing that you're doing and also something that doesn't feel so good. That's something that's unresolved. It's because I was in a hurt place or an angry place or an anxious place or a stressful place or an unheard place or some kind of place that didn't resonate with wholeness. When I was a child, I froze that. I froze my free flowing, happy child consciousness into an iceberg. And what remains of that? And I know you've done a lot of work, Alexandria. We all have. And we've all still questioned, well, how come I'm still feeling different stuff? I keep getting echoes of this or even something I didn't realize. I thought I worked on this so much. Well, life will bring it up. Anything that remains, it would not come up unless it was there. So it is there. That's a fact. So just as you've been doing tirelessly, let it come up, let it exude its energy. It hurts. I know. Let it melt. And it does help to take a walk in nature. It does help to be with things that connect you to the whole part of you, the wholeness, the wellness, because these can be very stressful times. So do that as well. But let these things start to melt out of you. Life will bring up in you whatever needs to melt out for all of us. If I have anger inside of me, a car will cut me off and I'll get angry. I wouldn't get angry unless I had anger inside of me. Yes, maybe there would be a little tiny bit of anger, but not to the degree I might feel. I mean, instead, if I didn't have anger inside of me, I might ask myself, I hope that driver's okay. Or what's wrong with them? I hope they must be going through a hard time to be driving like that. Or, you know, my society that I live in is a bit sick. Everybody's rushing around. They've got that hurry sickness. What can I do to help at least a little bit? If I didn't have my anger, I would feel more like that instead of darn it. Why did you do that? How did you cut me off? Learn to drive. That's me with repressed anger coming out. So life will help resonate with what is unresolved in us as well and help bring it out. That's the purpose of life is to help us clean, help us release this stuff. Good question. I hope that helps some. If more is wanted, just type in more and we'll go deeper. Alice, we like the instant fix, but slow waters run deep. Yes, Alice. So well said. Everybody, all of us here want the instant fix because it resolves it. If it were possible, it's not usually possible, but if it were, it resolves us and gets us out of the pain. Nobody wants to feel what's holding that ice cube together. We don't want to feel what's holding the obstacles we've created inside of us together. We don't want to feel that anxiety that we put into it years ago. We don't want to let it release. Just fix it. I want to get past it. Let's not talk about it because then I feel bad again. I wouldn't feel bad unless it was in me. So none of us want to feel that. We want to feel the fullness of our being. And slow waters do run deep because we are deep. Jesus said the Father and I are one. Well, how deep is the infinite? It's pretty deep. You're the same. I'm the same. Buddha said the same thing. Shiva, Krishna, everybody, same thing. We're all the same. You are just as powerful as Jesus and Buddha. It's only they melted more icebergs. And we're in the process of melting ours. No difference. You want to feel how intense you are? Feel how intense the pain you want to get away from is. Wow, I feel such anxiety. It's intense. I want it to be fixed quickly because it's so intense. That's how intense your beautiful radiance is. It's just been twisted and frozen into anxiety. When it unfreezes, untwists, your joy will be just that intense. That's how intense you are. Very intense. In a good way. Miffy says, Thanks. Thanks, Miffy. Great question. Gary, I love all your podcasts numbered in the lower 30s. Oh, thanks, Gary. You know, there's so many podcasts, I don't quite remember. But I do happen to have a list here. And I'm gonna just you've got my curiosity. Oh, yeah. Okay. The ones in the number in the lower 30s. I'll say what they are. Oh, 34. Hurry versus happiness. There's one that we were talking about Miffy. I think I have another one entitled hurry sickness, but I'm not sure. That one though. 34. That would be good. You'd like that. 33. Trusting again. Yep. Trusting again. You know, sometimes people ask, How do you trust? I can't trust. Well, to the degree that we're separated from ourselves, again, is proportional to our ability to not trust or to trust. So taking baby steps every day doing a little bit, you'll find that you trust a little bit more every day, a little bit more naturally. It's not something trust is, is the nature of your being. It's not something to achieve. It's who you are. So to the degree that I'm separated from myself to that degree, I don't trust. So you want to melt things, let them melt. All of these things, peace, love, wellness, happiness, they're who we are. And there's nothing we have to do to achieve them. We just stay on our daily path. I'm a big believer of baby steps, just a little something every day, a little melts. And then I feel a little bit more trust. The clouds are a little thinner. I can see the sunlight a little better, a little bit better, a little bit better. And then I take remedial steps because I'm not there instantly. So I go for a walk and I feel better. I smile. I feel better. I say hi to somebody. I feel better. I talked to a friend. I feel better. You do things in between also, and that helps the clouds part. So any better that you feel is the son of you, the son of your being. Oh, I feel good. I'm talking to my friend. They understand. I feel better. That better feeling that is you, all the other stuff. That's not better feeling. That's not you. That's stuff that still needs to melt and will melt. You are going to awaken. You are awakening already. If you're on this path, you know, I want to say that. Oh, let me finish with some of these that Gary said. Reference Episode 32, Relaxing into Happiness. See, Gary, what you're pointing to, Episode 31, Loving You. What you're pointing to, Gary, and I appreciate it so much is those podcasts, 34 through 31, that Gary just referenced, is us putting our attention on who we are, us loving love, us enjoying silence and peace, the peace of who we are, putting our attention, slowing down, stopping, taking in, realizing. So many of the other podcasts that I've done are about melting the obstacles. And that hurts. That's the pain. That's the hurt. It's necessary. But I often myself feel like I should emphasize more than just feeling who we are. So I may be doing some more podcasts like those lower 30 ones, Gary. Thank you for bringing that up. Let's see. Ruth says, Thank you. I was asking about the journey between attachment and non-attachment without swinging too far into indifference. You hit on it. Thank you, Ruth. Yes, I did a short podcast and it's about non-attachment. It's in the hundreds. It's really good on that subject. And yes, I know I say it's better to listen to them in order, but sometimes you just pick a title that resonates. That's a good one. Alexandria. Yep. Leaning into the tricky relationship rather than avoiding. Alexandria, you have so much courage. These things are hard, especially family stuff. All of you, so much courage. All of you. You know it. As I started to say, I talk about taking baby steps because you do have so much courage, but you don't want to burn out your nervous system. Take a breath. We don't have to solve this all at once. You know, as you sit still longer and longer, you'll start to experience intuitively, not through the mind, but intuitively, there is no such thing as time. Everything is fine. We're in no hurry. And most deeply, we're in good hands. We're in your hands. When Jesus said the father and I are one, there's only one set of hands. It's the infinite hands, whatever label you want to put on the infinite. But that's you. As you let go of your limited personality, as these ice cubes melt, you open. And what do you open into? The infinite. As you disappear, and by you, I mean all the problems, the tensions, the negative perspectives, all the troubles, as all that melts away, what's left? Happiness, joy, well-being. What's the infinite? Happiness, joy, well-being. It's just the infinite is looking through all of our eyes at the same time. So yes, in these stressful times, good to know you're in good hands. You're in your hands, your real hands. And what is guiding all of us, by the way, when I say you are going to awaken and you are awakening, how do I know that? Because it's, it's not in my little personal William hands, but a sign of what is happening is what I'm doing. I'm meditating. You're listening to this podcast. Something's going on, but what's guiding that? When little William disappears, that's called awakening. When Jesus said the father and I are one, Jesus let go of his Jesus-ness and all there is, is the father. When Buddha let go or Shiva, I better not talk about Shiva because I think he already started off let go. But when all these beings let go completely, all that is left is the infinite. It's what we're doing too. So when you let go of the little self, all that's left is your deepest self. And it's that deepest self that's guiding you right now. The little self might think it's doing things, but it's not, it doesn't exist. It's a figment of our imagination. It's an operating system. It appears to exist, but thoughts don't think. Computers don't think. Emotions don't feel. They're just lenses. Glasses don't see. Personalities aren't people. They're not. They're just lenses. They're tools. Your deeper self is looking through your personality. And as your personality clears, it sees more clearly through these eyes. Well, what's guiding the clearing up? That's your deeper self. It's what's guiding you on your awakening. It's a done deal. There is no such thing as time and your intent makes it a done deal. Is it wrong not to be awakened? No, it's fine. It's fine to be an actor in a movie. Like I'm, let's say I'm really a movie actor and I'm lost in the role. It's fine. It's art. Creation is fine. Everything is fine. But at some point to the degree I'm lost in the role, I'm separated from myself and that's painful. At some point, if I'm acting like somebody I'm not and I'm separated from myself, how do you find fulfillment? You can't ultimately because you're playing a role. So it's fine to be an actor, but eventually you get tired of the pain. So you want to come back to yourself and your higher self is guiding you in particular to come back to yourself. That's why you're listening to this podcast and all the other ones that you are. That's why you're meditating. That's why you're doing all the things you're doing. So that's how I know. Let's see. Gary says, yeah, he loves those early podcasts and they're good. I would recommend those to everybody, including I love them too. Alexandria, thanks for that nice donation. By the way, anybody, if you ever, this is not money-based as you can tell, but if sometimes you just feel like making a donation, just so you know, Insight Timer gives their share. I give my share. It all goes to take care of orphans in Timor, right off Bali. So it's a good thing on so many levels. Ruth says, and so thank you everybody, whenever, if ever. Mainly, I like to enjoy awakening with you. That's all it is. Ruth, trust is the crux of it all expounding into the realm of parent-child lessons. How do you teach and embody trust while also preparing kids and teens to be cautious, prudent, and alert to potential dangers, or even more simply instilling skills like contingency planning, sometimes a delicate balance without creating anxiety and kids. Another very deep, great question, Ruth. These questions require many levels to answer them fully, but on this one, let's just make a distinction between wisdom and trust. One of the things that catches us on our spiritual path is there's a difference between knowing ourselves, resting on our being and feeling happy, good and joyous. That's one thing. That's who we are. But then have you noticed if you try to apply it to a particular skill set that you have not developed yet, that you can get all twisted and snarled back up into your head and then cut off from yourself and start feeling anxious and bad. Because wisdom, right action, right speech, anything along those lines requires skills. And those skills are quite different than being in touch with who we are. Being in touch with who we are is trust. Trusting who we are. Learning skills is a different thing. They're two different things. So they can be taught as different things. Trust yourself, learn skills, trust yourself, learn to differentiate between trustworthy and untrustworthy situations and people out in the world. The world is made of duality. Certain things are not to be trusted. If you jump off a cliff, I will not trust that I will land safely. If I talk to people that are menacing, I am not going to trust that's going to have a good outcome. That's wisdom. But I do trust myself. I hope that's helpful. Gary says about these podcasts. Actually, they're all pretty damn good. Ah, Gary. I love you, Gary. Thank you. Alice isn't part of trust also about learning to trust ourselves, our own intuitiveness. Yes, ourself is intuitiveness. So trust is letting go of anything that would say otherwise. We've been intuitive the whole time. We've never been not intuitive, except for that somehow we created an obstacle to block ourselves from the intuitive part that we always are, always have been. How have we been intuitive the whole time? Because we're one. And if you're one, you're connected to everything. So of course, you feel everything. And sometimes we call that intuition, but it's really just who we are. We are everything. So we know everything on an intuitive level, not on a mental level. And so sometimes that trips people up and they go, well, it's not like I learned, like my mind thinks about things. It's just an intuition. No intuition is very powerful and very deep. It's just different. Great question, Alice. And learning to trust ourselves is that pendulum going back and forth deeper and deeper, deeper and deeper as we let different things go that obstruct us as we sit still, as we meditate, as we walk in the park, as we do so many things. Thank you, Alice. Great question. Alexandria says, Thank you, William. I love the way you encourage us. Thank you, Alexandria. I am you. I'm talking to me. I remember being in theological school decades and decades ago, I've told this story, just sitting in the dormitory in my dorm room, so lost, so lost, just grateful for any discussion that would be helpful. And that's what's behind these podcasts. Since then, I went to India, I've talked to hundreds of gurus and teachers, and I've sat still for a long time. So why did I do that? Because I was in so much severe pain. And that's a human condition. So as you sit still, you learn things that I don't even know. As I sit still, I learn things. But I've had the good grace to be able to do a lot of things. And I love to pass these on. So that's how I encourage you. That's why I encourage you because it's me. It's what people did for me. It's what I do for myself. Amy, can you touch on loneliness and codependency? Such a good topic, Amy. Again, for everybody, I would say go to these podcasts. They're all free. Start with number one and work your way forward. I say that just so if we run out of time, and I know we're a bit over and I don't touch on this as deeply as you need. It's in there. Loneliness and codependency. Loneliness is to the degree I'm cut off from myself. I've created old obstacles that cut me off from myself because I'm not lonely deep inside. I'm love itself. I am one. I am everything. I am all people. I am all things. And this is a true experience, not just a philosophy. As you sit still, you come to this. It's a fact. It's an experience like jumping in the water, swimming. The water feels wet. Reading about it's one way. Jumping in the water and swimming. You come to a whole different level of understanding. So that's what happens on this path. When you're still a little bit separated from yourself. And Amy, this isn't you. It's not just me. It's not just every single person here. It's everybody in the world feel some degree of loneliness at times, maybe severely. And to the degree I feel lonely, I will feel codependent. And the reason for that is I don't want to lose your love. If I do something that upsets you, maybe you'll leave me. Also, if I do something that upsets you, I have unresolved things and I don't want to be upset. I don't want anybody to touch my hurt places. So I feel your pain as well, because it's also my pain that I have not resolved. But as we've all heard so many times, each of us has to resolve our own pain. Nobody can do it for us, yet we do care. We have great compassion for one another. So come back to yourself, melt that which blocks you from yourself. The inner obstacles that I've created years ago, and I've submerged because they hurt. By the way, when I create an obstacle, is it an unloving act? No, not No, it's never an unloving act. For instance, if I resent you, why do I resent you? Because I love myself and you did something that hurt. And I love myself, my resentment is an act of love. And then I freeze it and I stick it inside of me, which hurts me for a long time until I let it go. That's what these podcasts are about letting it go. How the house but it's a loving act. If I do anything, let's say I'm growing up and somebody says that somebody that I admire says, you're very stupid, you're very stupid, you're very stupid. Now I admire that person and I want their love. So because I love myself, and I, I want their love, I want to be your friend. So I'll, I'll agree with you. Yes, I'm stupid. Yes, I agree. Yes. Love me because I agree with you. I know that's an extreme example. But these things happen. So I submerged this low self esteem inside of myself. Why? Because I love myself. But it hurts me. It's maladaptive. It's loving, but it's maladaptive. So all of this is interrelated. Thank you, Gary, for your donation. Thank you so much. Jodi says about these podcasts, I agree, Gary, I'm loving them. Thank you. And Alice Stone. Thank you, everybody. Straight to the orphans. Thank you, Jennifer. Yes, this is great. Thanks, William and everybody. And everybody's saying thank you and lots of good things. And Cassandra's ass very important as the podcast link in your profile. Yes, it's in my profile. But you can also just go search under teachers on inside timer or any really any, any platform, you can go to search and type my name, William Cooper, and awakening, or on inside timer, which I thoroughly support because they are doing such a good thing in the world. Just type my name, William Cooper, and all of them will come up. When you want a specific podcast, like I'm recommending start at number one, type in William Cooper one, just the number one, and one will come up and then William Cooper two and two will come up. If you just type my name, all of them will come up, but they'll, they'll be out of order sometimes. So if you need a specific one, just type that specific number. Amy says, Thank you. Okay, everybody. Thank you so much. It's been such a joy. Happy holidays. You're doing such a good job with such courage. Take it easy on yourself. Take a breath. We don't have to awaken all at once. Awakening doesn't work that way. It's in the podcast. You'll see. Okay, thanks so much. I look forward to talking to you next time. Thanks for the great vibes. Yes, Maya. Thank you. Take care. Bye. Hello, this is William. I trust you enjoyed this podcast. How would I listen to them? Since each podcast is built on the podcasts that stand before them, I would start with number one and work my way forward. If you enjoyed this podcast, please consider sharing it with a friend. Thanks so much. Bye.