Absolute Love

Season five we are doing something a bit different and have guests!

Today we are going to talk about absolute love and how it can support us.

This week’s guest on the show is the authentically beautiful yoga teacher, actor, and poet Charlotte Taylor. 

Charlotte shares her experience of absolute love and how we can learn to love ourselves unconditionally. Join her on a journey through her life experiences.

This show includes a meditation to help you feel more love as well as some loveable ideas to support your journey.

If you like the show, please  share a review on which station you are using to listen in on or go to: Podpage

Charlotte's contact details:  patchtayloryoga@gmail.com
Instagram:@just_charlotte__

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Transcript

Welcome to The Gentle Yoga Warrior weekly podcast in association with nature meditations dot Earth. So let's do this. Let's reconnect with joy once again. So hello, listeners, I am absolutely excited. Today, I am joined by a wonderful light being. And we're going to talk today about absolute love with Charlotte Taylor, yoga teacher, actress poets. And to me a person who has a real ability to connect with people and always walks a truth a warrior. So Charlotte, Welcome. Welcome.

Unknown Speaker  13:41  
Welcome having me. This is a It's a pleasure to be here. So thank you for asking me to come and have a have a cup of coffee and a chat. I think it's great. Oh,

Unknown Speaker  13:51  
my pleasure. My pleasure. So today, we're going to talk about absolute love. So the theme of season five is all it's all about absolute. And what could be more important than love. I for me, I think this is what I was. Delete. Sorry. That's the beauty of it. Okay, so for me, love. I was thinking about it before we touched base this morning. And I was thinking all hearts are deserving of love. Regardless. We are all divine, filled to the brim with love, therefore are eight enough. So yes, thank you so so over to you, Charlotte. So absolutely love what drew you to speak about this and what is absolute love?

Unknown Speaker  14:44  
You know, I think I think for so long. I think all of us have our own interpretations of what of what it means and we use the word so freely. And maybe it's not until you have maybe big chapters in your life, big moments. of grief, sadness, or things have changed that really bring about what does love actually really mean to me? And I feel it's, it's an everything that we do, and certainly everything that I do. And when you really sit with that, you realise how vast and actually how big love is. And there are 1,000,001 meanings rather than just the kind of standard dictionary meaning and about two years ago, I read a quote, and it said, taking care of yourself, doesn't mean me. First, it means Me too. That really hit me. And, you know, two years ago, maybe I didn't quite understand the poignancy of what that meant. But it kind of it resonated deep inside. And there was a big, big hole of silence. And I wondered what that was. And I realised that actually, the person that I'd forgotten to love for so long was myself. And that relationship was not there. And so speaking about absolute love, I think I can probably guarantee that if we ask that question, What does love mean to you? What is love that we'd always say, a person or an animal or a place or a job, but we would probably put ourselves on the list last?

Unknown Speaker  16:32  
Oh, that is so hard. I was out. That's one of the points I really want to speak to today about is the self love, like we can extend compassion to so many people so much love, but when it comes to myself, we can be horrible, right? Charlotte, we can be me.

Unknown Speaker  16:47  
Absolutely. And you just become somebody that you forget. And I, I've realised that in order to have the relationships that I want in order to have the jobs that I want. And in order to kind of move in the way that I that I really want to the journey, I want to take myself on that I have to learn to build that relationship with myself. Because through trial and error, and also just growing. That's why I'm realising that the parts of me that I don't understand or haven't taken the time to nurture are actually probably the things that are holding you back from the things that you you really want. And so that's why I wanted to talk about this because it can be really scary thing. It's so easy to sit here and say yeah, it's all about self love. Okay, but where does where does that start? And how do I begin? And that is the most exciting, terrifying, wonderful whirlwind of a journey that does not stop. And so I, I really thought that this would be great to chat about because I if it inspires one person to just take a moment to kind of sit with themselves and go ha, me too. You know, I forgot myself too. And that's not a negative and it's not a failing, and it doesn't mean anything other than well done you for realising that actually, let's celebrate people that realise that they forgot something. Oh, that's, that's true, because that was actually

Unknown Speaker  18:16  
cut. So I was actually going to ask you about that. What would you say to someone who feels that their life completely lacks in love?

Unknown Speaker  18:27  
And they just think, well, how can I get this love? Well, you know, because we tend to look outside ourselves. Do I think, first of all, 99% of the time, you're already doing it, you have everything you need within yourself, you know, we were seekers of everything, but actually everything, everything that you need is within you. And so it starts with with just a case of, you just have to show up. You just have to be willing to jump in and to listen. And that's really it. What that really means is sometimes you just have to listen until you hear something because it's in those, those silences and stillness is is where you're going to really meet yourself. And that is terrifyingly scary at times to do that, because you might not know what that's gonna sound or feel like but I promise you, if you learn to just jump in, there's going to be a really exciting journey and you're going to really get to see who that person is that everybody else loves. You know, yeah,

Unknown Speaker  19:38  
we cannot blinkers Can't we so often we don't see ourselves we just we tend to just make a list in our mind all the things that we think's wrong with us instead of accepting my own uniqueness, our own beauty and through that is through the action of self love which you put so eloquently of the process as we talk through This podcast saga This is great. So I was so Charlotte selong theme of the podcast you grew up. So Charlotte, you grew up in North north Wales in the countryside, did a lot of matches Do you think that helped you on your, your, your journey to love like, you know, sings

Unknown Speaker  20:26  
I think so I think be having the freedom as a child to explore, because I think love is all about discovery and exploration. And I think that the it's always evolving. So I think when you think you know what love is think again, literally, because as you grow, what you need, what your values are, and, and those are going to change. And so I think being able to be outside a lot and be in the fields. And I think I said to you that the only the only rule I had for my parents when I was growing up was just come back when the street lamps Come on. And, you know, that is like living in the Golden Ages. Now, you know, I feel so privileged and so lucky that it was safe enough to, to go and explore, because I think any journey to self requires an awful lot of courage and bravery to do it yourself. Because, you know, you can have with all the best will in the world have fantastic parents and fantastic friends. There's only so much they can do for you. But it's going to get to a point where it's on you, it relies on you to really get in there. And I think the biggest fear we will have is is failing and getting it wrong. And losing and being abandoned and being rejected. And I'm still working on all those things. You know, I'm not a finished product that those things don't, don't hurt or don't Oh, I don't struggle with but they enrich your understanding of love, they enrich. Because what I'm really learning is if I don't understand what love really means for me, I'm not going to be able to teach other people what love I require. And then you're not going to really welcome in the right kind of love. So it's a bit like learning a language, right or letting to walk, you're never good at it at the start. And that's never like, it takes time. You know. And I think we forget that as we grow older, we lose that wonderful, that wonderful child play. And we talk about inner child and we talk about that an awful lot. And really, it's just the bliss of play, like, learn to play, I think, if any advice I would give in any realm of any anything in life, if you're not playing, then that's probably what's missing that spark of light to play. Get out there. There's no rules to play in either. There's no rules, you know. And so yeah, learn to play. And if you don't know what I mean, go to park and watch dogs and children, dogs and children will show you best that no inhibitions

Unknown Speaker  23:05  
they have this like natural ability just to love life and accept it as it is be completely in the moment and completely present. I think that's so so on key at the moment play a giant sort such a missing component and people's lives and fruit play and joy. We do manifest love in all different ways and all different beings. So I know that you went on a tour for about 18 months when we first were fit for your acting and acting. Yes. The reason I bring up the acting, I think to be a actor takes a lot of bravery and vulnerability. And again, to be vulnerable is to show oneself love to actually get there sometimes you get rejected sometimes, you know, so what did that teach you? What went on that journey?

Unknown Speaker  23:54  
You know, that was in my career. That was it was so it was a one woman play as well. So be on tour for that long. You know, I had a stage manager but to be on the road, you know, we were travelling all over the whole country we were at we were at certain places for four or five days and then we'd move we'd move to another place. And you know, the joy of it was it was also exciting and wonderful at the beginning and but you know, it came with its it was lonely at times. And hard and tiring. And as the toll went on, you know, I was playing about 15 different characters in this play. Wow. That's amazing. 15 Wow, that's a lot to learn. It was wonderful. So I was working on a play with a wonderful writer for john Barton. And the director was Jimmy Grimes who was puppet director of warhorse so the play was actually to do it. So it was a wonderful gift to have to Luck was such creative inspiring souls and, and it sparks so much joy and play, and there was a lot of love again in in that production and you know, it's so easy when you're in something when you're in anything, you know, it's really hard to see what you're learning. And it's really hard to realise that no matter what you will look back and be able to go ha, actually, you know what I did really well, you know, it was hard. And I was on my own 90% of the time, and, you know, standing on a stage on your own. Sounds easy, and I thought it was gonna be I missed my other actors, I missed the relationships, I missed that connection. And, but what it really did do was actually really address the relationship I had with myself. Because I was my everything, you know, I had to rely on myself, I had to be my best friend at times, I also had to be, you know, the person that would say, Come on, you know, you can let's do this and my own encourager and think that was the beginning of discovery of like, actually, who am I? And what do I need? And what do I want? And what's my message in this world? And, you know, why am I getting up in the morning? And I, it really sparked that, whether I was aware of that or not, which leads nicely into I know, we chatted about the tour ended and it was a big for relief, also a sadness, like losing something like grief. It's been routine. Yeah. So again, sorry. It was like, it was a routine. And I didn't you never really realise sometimes, you know, the old saying, when you go, Oh, I wish I would have I wish I hadn't done or I didn't do that enough. And I was left with a bit of that of, I wish I would have embodied a bit more that or I wish I would have just done this and that and really trying to I have to try so hard with that one. I'm sure we all do. But I can't change what what's gone. I but what I can do is learn from it. So I think going back to the past and your life is a wonderful place for reflection, but it's not a place to get stuck. So you go back.

Unknown Speaker  27:21  
Yeah, people get so stuck. If it was a nice time, we'll just get stuck there and just kind of judge their their life now on a happier time and when that happiness is available to them now.

Unknown Speaker  27:34  
Absolutely. And then you're missing it because because really the best moments of your life, you're living them right now. Like right now that that right here. And it's so hard to live in the immediacy of the moment, but I cannot tell you how. You know, I feel really emotional saying that because the immediacy of the moment is, it is where the love is, is where the joy is, it's where you're going to have your biggest, most amazing revelations. And so I think on that have courage. If I could give anything to anyone listening, it would be, have the courage to, to, to break, to, to love to live to sacrifice, but have the courage to soar to you know, grief doesn't mean that it's always going to be bad. You can use your grief to fill your heart with so much love, that you're going to soar and you're going to travel the world and share what that means and I think and turning your miseries or your sadnesses into joys you your it's a gift and actually your gift like you're the gift don't go searching for this thing when actually like, you're the gift

Unknown Speaker  28:46  
you know, oh as people just really need to remember that like they kind of forget what what amazing gift because we're all like up on unique in vibration. We are made of love like matter, spirit put loving love into our matter. We're all made love. Yes, we linger too much on bad feelings and or we don't allow them we either linger too much on them or don't allow them and we've loved there will be pain, it's the polarities, but we so often forget about that. So I know for yourself that when you feel stuck, you like to turn to movements. Hence while you went down, you've gone down the amazing, unique, I would say yoga teacher, and we also do a lot of work with movements and it's something that brings you a lot of joy and a lot of love into your life. Maybe you could share a bit more about that with our listeners.

Unknown Speaker  29:41  
Yeah. Are you just saying that like, you can't see my smile, but I am smiling. I plan to dispense one very loose kind of hearing you say movement, you know, and yeah, I I went when I started training to be a yoga teacher. And fell in love with the general movement with my breath, like learning to breathe with my movement kind of really opened a lot for me and, and the teaching has been wonderful and I've grown and just recently, having started to go back to more movement based stuff with no rules and exploring my body again and learning to how can I tell stories with my body and not my words. By learning that the silence is sometimes the most richest, purest, most beautiful thing that's actually very much full of love and, and having spent a lot of time on my own this year. And last year at times, which I know we all have, I've really, I have really enjoyed it. And I've enjoyed getting to know myself and my body again, and movement heals me, you know, when you set yourself in motion, you're already ready for a ride and, and Gabriella Roth, one of my she really inspires me a beautiful lady that created the five rhythms. He always said, all you have to do is have a willing to a willingness to jump in. And she smiles and she laughs I think this is on an interview and she just ends it with have a great trip. And you know, and it is a trip, you know, and I think what's so wonderful about movement is dance when you're grieving move when you're happy move when you're angry, like what's your angry dance? What What does, what does chaos that like to you? What does ugliness feel like in your body, because I'll tell you now all of them are beautiful. And actually, they all they all they all enrich the journey of who you are. Because Instagram is so so good. And all social media platforms, it's showing you what beauty is. And actually, I feel like we're missing actually, what the real beauty is, which is actually just your truth. You know, and, and I, I am more inspired by seeing that. Because that makes me feel more because what that does is it makes me feel, oh, I'm not alone, great. There's something else that's, that's having a really crappy week, or, you know, there's somebody else that's not where they are and where they want to be in their career, or there's somebody that's living in a country they don't want to be in. Yeah, I celebrate that. Because that's, that is brave to be able to say, I don't feel good today, actually. And you know what I'm going to honour that rather than avoid it. And, you know, look at social media and see how wonderful life is. And it's not the real, the real real.

Unknown Speaker  32:52  
So I would say from listening to that, that the beauty and the love is actually being completely authentic, honouring all aspects of yourself, but seeing all his love. So when something doesn't work out, necessarily, there is a love behind that sometimes, you know, like, you know, sometimes things that we think, oh, why didn't this happen, we're really disappointed, then that can end up being the biggest blessing. And it takes us down a different route or a different journey. And absolutely, I

Unknown Speaker  33:22  
think that's a great thing. You just said that to think about, like, think about in your life, when you've had moments where something hasn't worked out. And at the time, it's like the world is ending. And then at some point in your life, it's like a jigsaw piece puzzle that you've lost because you tidy it away and you find under the sofa and you're like, ah, makes sense. And and so you know that what I'm learning is that the universe doesn't make mistakes. And when you start trusting in that, actually the world stops being so scary, because I kind of use that sometimes whether you use mantras or you don't, you know, it's, I always think to myself when I'm having a bit of a the universe does not make mistakes. So that means I'm okay. And I'm always gonna be okay. And that might mean that I just have to go through this muddy patch to to learn something that I'll be reminded of, and I think, you know, yet trust Yeah, we've got to do a lot more trusting.

Unknown Speaker  34:25  
 Yeah, trust comes from somewhere really deep within I was talking about this on a previous podcast, we're talking about faith, that faith faith is having trust, trust in something greater, something greater than his love. And that love is like everything. We wouldn't be here without love. Literally not nothing would exist. We wouldn't exist without look. So for any listeners we've got. And so for any listeners out there today, what what is the most simple tip that you could give them? Would you say they're sitting at home, they're feeling miserable feeling like life's lacking in love and joy. Just Just a little bite sized thing that they can do to help them feel love.

Unknown Speaker  35:23  
I think the most important thing is to not just just arrive I think I said this at the beginning, it's all you actually have to do is just attend to arrive, metaphorically, that might mean staring at this door that you've been looking at for your whole life, it might be 2030 years, it might be years, depending on where you are in your journey of in life. Just go through the door, just with no expectation of what you're going to find what you should find just wholeheartedly, all of you the messiness because your messiness is your beauty. Throw yourself in there, jump off that diving board and just see what happens. get curious, get get curious again to to live and be curious again, to, to feel again, to be again, and to begin again, and always know that you can begin again, you can always begin again. You know, I always say that to people, like if a friend will ring me and say, ah, and today's crap I've wasted today. I'm like, What time is it? And then I why, and then like, two o'clock and I'm like, Okay, well, then we start, you know, you can restart at any time. You know, it doesn't have to, you're in charge of the continuation of whatever's going on. So you are the creator. So it's powerful. You're powerful, you know, yeah. So that,

Unknown Speaker  36:49  
you know, that's a mate. That's a great tip, because sometimes we can just get too much and in that headspace of, I'll put too many labels on what we should think should be it should be talking about labels. This is quite interesting. I am I made myself a cup of Yogi tea this morning. Yeah, we all have I don't have an answer. For the listeners, you're at all the little tea bags have like little m, affirmations on them or little sayings. And this one says, where there is love there is no question. And that was the one and the cup of tea that I made just now so so Exactly. That judge

Unknown Speaker  37:27  
love just welcomes and says, Come on in. And, and I think I think that's that I I just even thinking about it makes me feel full. And maybe that's just a case of you just need to remember that as like sit with that. And it loves like hope comes in many forms, you never know when it's coming. So if you're always ready and open and available, then it was not going to miss you. It's never going to miss you. And maybe just to quickly touch on lost love because I'm sure that all of us have, you know, some of us are in relationships, and some of us aren't. And some of us have gone through hard relationships and through going through something in my own journey. And what I really, really, really hope for you for anyone listening out there that maybe is going through some hardship or feels like they never want to love again, is to please don't please, please have, please have hope. And, and please don't allow yourself to not fall back in love with love. Because I promise you it's it's a really amazing place out there. And I'm stepping in and afraid to and I'm finding it hard and i'm i'm also finding exciting, but don't give up on love. And and because it's the heartbeat of life and beautiful heartbeat of heartbeat is the heartbeat of life, your life and and just on that just just be brave and be courageous. And if you need help come find me. You know, come and find the

Unknown Speaker  39:09  
How can you? How can people find you? What's the best way to contact your Instagram?

Unknown Speaker  39:15  
Yeah, Instagram is the best I'm quite I'm quite kind of like elusive at the moment. I like that I like trying to just sort of like what works work stuff out. So Instagram currently is the best platform to define me on and I'm I'm just charlet on Instagram, on Instagram. Yeah, send me a message. I always take the time to reply. So if anyone has anything that they'd like to ask or sometimes you just need someone to hold you accountable. Right? So knowing that there's someone there that you can just set just kind of share with. I'd love to hear from people because I learned then so I'd love to hear your stories on love as well. I love to hear what people are in their journeys and I think right now what the world needs more than anything is community. And community is love. And so it's all about for me, bringing people together, that's my journey at the moment is how can I reconnect people together?

Unknown Speaker  40:16  
And what a beautiful thing to want to do. So community is so, so important right now in this world. And we're so disconnected. So by reaching out to someone by phone, if there's other mediums that you can use phone, you can use online, all different ways. But it's so important to have that sense of connection. I asked. Okay, I've got one more final question for you. I asked all my guests this. And don't worry if you're not reading anything at the moment. What are you reading? Oh, actually, no, I want to quit the RC about your poetry. So are you working on anything on your poetry at the moments and what's happening with that?

Unknown Speaker  40:53  
I am and it's funny you ask I I reached I, you know, poetry has been ongoing for 10 years for me and directly alongside being an actor. And I think for so long, I hadn't quite realised what what what it was, you know, I would just scribble stuff on piece of paper bags of receipts and then collect all this stuff. And it wasn't until the pandemic last year when I went back to my parents and I stumbled upon what felt like a treasure chest of stuff and, and I started writing again, and, and so I'm close to putting stuff together and, and I'm really close to being ready to share to share some things and a lot of it is on love. And a lot of it is and it's all about rediscovering the person that I forgot to love. And that was myself. Oh, wow. It's gonna be hopefully, um, hopefully there'll be lots of things in there that you can resonate with. And I really hope that what I hope is that the book of poems will feel like like a hot cup of tea on a really rubbish mourning or like, how it feels when you sit on your favourite bench. And I really want that the book to feel like like love, I want you to hold it and feel like love. And if you don't have love, know that you have love the minute you pick it up, you know, so

Unknown Speaker  42:21  
I want I'm definitely buying a copier. Wait till it's out. I'm definitely that's that's when it's so exciting. I really look forward to to reading that. So I ask all my guests this question. And what are you reading right now? It's not reading as some piece of music and if anything that you would like you think is very good for our listeners to have a connection with right now? Or could be?

Unknown Speaker  42:46  
Well, I just started something, actually. And it's called non violent communication.

Unknown Speaker  42:53  
Wow, that's a nonviolent communication. So in the sense, it's trying to make people communicate in a more loving way.

Unknown Speaker  43:01  
Also to help you understand when someone doesn't understand you, how do you help that person understand? How do you make it more accessible, and I'm such an early stages of it. And it's already like blowing my mind. And it's, I can tell it's a book that I'm gonna have to read like several times, and I can't remember who the author is. But if there's no other book called nonviolent communication, and it's wonderful. And because we all have people in our lives, that we struggle to communicate with all that struggle to understand this, and I was thinking about this the other day when I read a quote about, and I even wrote it down, because I always tend to, like hear things and then think, you know, like I, what was it? Yeah, and go for it. So I read this other day, and it was like, communication. And we don't listen, to understand, we listen to reply, when actually what we should be doing is listening to understand somebody that's so true, is we don't

Unknown Speaker  44:07  
sometimes we are always thinking about what we're going to say next, rather than listening to what the person is actually saying. And people like to feel like they're listened to.

Unknown Speaker  44:14  
Absolutely. And I think a real quick task for you to kind of like implement into your life, which actually will show you so much is when somebody says something to you. Take five seconds, to have that silence to really hear what that person has said to you before you respond because I can guarantee you the words that you will use to respond will be completely different if you just go straight in with a reply and willingness love, isn't it hearing is love be feeling heard as being feeling loved. And absolutely. And actually, you know what, that is all anybody really wants in this world. And I think a lot of conflict in the world in general comes from not being understood. So if you take anything from this, you know, go into your days and your weeks and your months, and really try to understand what someone's saying, rather than waiting for your chance to jump back in and have a reply. And actually, it's in that silence that you'll probably really learn to understand somebody that often anger is sadness, we get so judgmental about anger being a negative emotion, and it's actually beautiful, because there's a lot of sadness in there and a lot of misunderstanding going on. So try and take away the tone and the sounds and actually listen to the words. And actually, you know, having started to implement that into my own life has really helped with difficult relationships they have but get the book the book better than I do to get

Unknown Speaker  45:46  
I just, well, I just like Thank you. It's been an absolute joy listeners do stay on stick. Thank you. So thank you, Charlotte. It's been an absolute joy to have you on the show today. So check Charlotte out it just Charlotte on Instagram. And do stay tuned up as I'm going to be sharing with you a meditation on love. Thank you, Charlotte.

Unknown Speaker  46:12  
Yeah, thank you so much for having me. It's been a joy.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

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