The Titanium Vault hosted by RJ Bates III

Between Two Belts with Jeremy Knauff!

RJ Bates III and Jeremy Knauff Episode 681

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SPEAKER_00:

Hello and welcome to Between Two Belts. I'm your host, RJ Bates the Third, and today cut that out. Today I'm sitting down with Jeremy. Why can't we just get normal names? How do you say it?

SPEAKER_01:

You didn't do the hooked on Vonics? No. No. Kanoff? Yeah, and and how's your Kaniee doing?

SPEAKER_00:

Ha! Oh look, we got a funny guy. Except for the fact I know him. You see, Jeremy is the guy I called when I was wrongfully fired from television. Isn't that right, Jeremy? Yeah, but you didn't have to leak that sex tape. That was entirely on you. See, now people think that there's a sex tape. Okay. There is. Okay. Well, as a PR guy, that's what you consider yourself, right? Yes, I would say that's a fair representation.

SPEAKER_01:

Why did you do nothing for me? Well, I mean, there's only so much you can do after a video like that comes out. This is ridiculous. Yes. Yes. This is like the Timu version of Duck Dynasty here. What's going on? Wow.

SPEAKER_00:

Holy shit. What is happening? Hey, can we start this over? Can we start this over? What are you shaking your head for? What kind of listen. Did you lose your train of thought? I crack the jokes. Well, and you fucking take it. I think we're using the joke. It doesn't work the other way around. The only person that does that is John Jackson.

SPEAKER_01:

We're using the word joke a little loosely here, don't you think?

SPEAKER_00:

Who invited you on this show? Some hillbilly. It just grabbed me in the middle of the hallway. I invited you because I wanted to talk about the PR nightmare that I had when I got fired from TV. Yeah. And somehow you turned it into your cracking jokes on me. Yeah. Okay. So you done with the Dutch Dynasty jokes?

SPEAKER_01:

Oh God, not even close. You're going to start with Z Z Top next? No, you are certainly not a sharp dressed man.

SPEAKER_00:

This is insane. This is insane. You know, I regret a lot of this. I regret this moment right now. This is the look of regret. But we're going to fight through this moment right now. All right. Okay. Kind of like third game. Green back to you're a PR guy.

SPEAKER_01:

How did you get into that? Uh well, this guy came to me with this sex tape that got leaked and said, you know, I need some help with this.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, sex tape. I had a sex tape, apparently. Yeah. You know what? Sex tape is better than white supremacists. Yes.

SPEAKER_01:

I should go with this. Let's run with it. What kind of sex tape was it? Uh, it was white supremacy sex tape.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh man. I can we just bleep that whole part out. I don't know if we can as a PR guy, can we have that on YouTube?

SPEAKER_01:

Absolutely. Yeah. You might get a community violation of some sort, but that's true.

SPEAKER_00:

When uh when I did come to you, Jeremy, um, you you mentioned that not much could come from me going after Disney. Why was that?

SPEAKER_01:

Uh man, it's a multi-billion dollar corporation. And would they have murdered me? Man. Uh if you'd asked me a few years ago, I'd probably say no. But seeing what's going on in the world nowadays, I'm not sure. That's right. Mickey Mouse. The mouse is in the house.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. Pretty crazy. Yeah. Over a house flipping show. So let's talk about how you actually help people. Do you do like the whole like fake uh news articles and stuff? No, we don't do fake news here. Oh, I can have a real. Can you can you get me hooked up? Always. With who? Name, throw some names out. Forbes.

SPEAKER_01:

Forbes is okay, but they are kind of uh a little bit sleazy these days. See? Faith. Yeah. That's what you meant by that. Entrepreneur magazine, Fox Business, Newsmax, take your pick.

SPEAKER_00:

Are you a conservative? I am. That's why you mentioned Fox Business multiple times. You just wanted to go that up? Sure. Yeah? Yeah. I like that. Do you like Elon? I do.

SPEAKER_01:

Somewhat. There's some things I don't like about him. What do you not like? Uh I would say his insistence on uh scaling up the H1B visa program for one example. I have no idea what he's talking about. I'm just a little bit. It is where they are bringing in foreign workers to take the jobs that Americans should actually be taking.

SPEAKER_00:

This makes sense. I actually did know I was just trying to give you credit. Oh, okay. Trying to make you look like the smart one. This is the path that I'm taking during this interview because you came out guns of fucking blazing. By the way, we I never actually got your last name since you know it's not Kenny. Yeah, it's not Kenny.

SPEAKER_01:

So you're just knoff? Yes. Come on, a white supremacist like you should know how to pronounce a German name. What?

SPEAKER_00:

Man, that is harsh in this episode. Is this what I do to other people? Probably. I've never been on this side before. It's very interesting. Catch my train of thought. What am I supposed to ask you now? Whatever you want, man. You want to interview me?

SPEAKER_01:

Um, it's your show, man. You gotta interview me.

SPEAKER_00:

I I don't even know what's happening. It's the end of the day, it's been a long day. Um, you came out guns ablazing. You're from Germany, and I didn't even know that. Normally I catch that early on, make some Nazi joke.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

And we went down the Dutch Dynasty route. Mickey Mouse is gonna murder me.

SPEAKER_01:

So it gives me talking about it it reminds me of a story. Oh, here we go. If we if you want to go down this path. Let's do it. So I had this uh, I had this guy in my unit in the Marine Corps, and he was probably I'm a tall guy, about 6'2. He was probably about 6'5, if I had to guess. Really, really skinny and just pale, pale, pale. And we had just come back from a PFT. You know what PFT is? No. I believe that. PFT is a physical fitness test. So we have to do this every so often in the Marine Corps, every year. And after the PFT, this kid, Sorensen, had come back into the company office and he had taken off his shirt. And my lieutenant says, God damn, Sorensen. He's like, What, sir? You look like you just got out of Auschwitz. And he's like, That's fucked up, sir. And he's like, No, it's not. You know, I'm just fucking with you. And I was like, no, sir, that is fucked up. He said, What are you talking about, Knopf? You make fun of him all the time. I said, Sir, my grandfather died in Auschwitz. He says, Oh my god, Corporal Knopf, I'm so sorry. I had no idea. I feel like such a piece of shit right now. I said, It's all right, sir, don't worry about it. He just fell out of the guard tower.

SPEAKER_00:

I feel like this entire episode, I've just been catching haymakers. This is this is uh yeah. Yeah. This goes down as my least favorite episode of Between Two Belts, and that's saying a lot because I've had Steve Train on here.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh man, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. Um, well, I always end the episodes by asking him what's your greatest achievement in life, but I have to say it's probably this episode of Between Two Belts. Well, it will be in a minute once I get up and walk out. Next level. Um wow, that's Jeremy, and I used to be the host of Between Two Belts.