S6. Ep 9. Two Gays and the Courgette

Ever received a mysterious text that led to an unforgettable adventure? Benji did, and it started with "Golf Course." This week, we recount the hilarity and romance that unfolded from this cryptic message, revealing unexpected connections and a charmingly awkward encounter. As Benji transitions from anonymous dating to seeking friends with benefits, you’ll be in stitches with the side-splitting details of an impromptu golf course escapade. The laughs keep coming as we dive into Benji’s evolving love life and the unpredictable twists that come with it.

But that's not all! Brace yourself for tales that are both outrageous and cringe-worthy as we share stories of everyday items being used in unconventional ways. From vegetables in intimate settings to a friend's unfortunate trip to A&E, we promise you won't believe some of these wild anecdotes. Finally, we delve into the emotional labyrinth of transitioning a friendship to friends with benefits, featuring a listener's heartfelt story and our candid advice. With humor, personal anecdotes, and plenty of surprises, this episode is a rollercoaster you won't want to miss!

Chapters

• 0:19 Adventures at the Golf Course
• 12:31 Unusual Items in the Bum
• 19:54 Friends With Benefits Dilemma

Transcript

Speaker 2 0:19

Hello and welcome to this week's episode of my Big Gay Podcast With me, benji, I've put my name in and me, brad, giving you the life, the loves and lols of living in London.

Speaker 1 0:31

How many have you had Two gays?

Speaker 2 0:33

One city, six bottles of wine what?

Speaker 1 0:36

could possibly go wrong, goodness me.

Speaker 2 0:40

We need to stop drinking before we start doing the episodes.

Speaker 1 0:43

Oh, I know, but I do like the rosé wine. I'm going through a bit of a rosé phase at the moment. Love rosé, yes, way rosé.

Speaker 2 0:50

Please never say that again. That's the most icky thing I think you've ever done in my life. I think there's been more icky things I've done in the past. That is true, and some of yeah, I'm really, really great.

Speaker 1 1:04

I've had an amazing week. The bizarre thing is that we know we've got our group chat about the podcast. Yeah, you just the other day just texted Golf Course, so are you okay?

Speaker 2 1:15

Yes, I'm fine, thank you very much. So this WhatsApp group I said it's a WhatsApp group, there's only the two of us in it and one of our producers, and every now and then, when we come up with good topics that we want to talk about, we just pop in little reminder words. And yeah, mine this week was golf course, because I'll tell you what I had a wild time did you.

Speaker 1 1:32

I did because it was. I was on the tube. I came out the tube. It was like ping ping golf course from benji. I'm like what is he bloody on about? So I'm ready for this story.

Speaker 2 1:40

We're gonna go straight in because, legit podcasters, we don't talk about some of these stories before we go air, before we go live, because we want to give you the um honest reaction. So are you ready for my golf store, golf course story yes, because you don't play golf.

Speaker 2 1:53

So I have no idea where this is going I actually used to have golf lessons when I was younger that sounds like a very jersey boy thing to do yeah, it was so boring, so sorry yeah, sorry to golfers out I never really got past the teeing off sitch.

Speaker 2 2:05

Could you swing the bat? Oh, I'm great at swinging and I'm great at getting things in holes, Especially in one, but yeah, golf just wasn't for me. I'm not going to lie, However. So I was back at home for a few days and I was on the good old yellow Facebook and this guy came up, really attractive guy and had really good vibes. Now I'm going through a slightly different phase using that app and I'm looking for more I want to say friends with benefits right, okay.

Speaker 2 2:34

You know I used to do like the F&G. I told you about that.

Speaker 1 2:37

You did the.

Speaker 2 2:38

Anon, f&g and like the wham bam, thank you, ma'am, and just get out. Yeah, thank you, man, not ma'am. Yeah, um, but now I'm like actually having a little chat with someone, getting to know them, getting kind of like mates, then getting down to it and then chatting and leaving. It's actually so much more fulfilling this is growth for you I think so.

Speaker 2 2:57

I still don't necessarily want like a relationship from it, but I'm enjoying getting to know them more before like, yeah, I at least getting their name. That's a first for you. It certainly is. My little black book of like people that I've slept with is just sort of like guy number five.

Speaker 1 3:15

Man in socks Twink with an owl tattoo. They're all called that. Well, they are when I'm done with them anyway. No.

Speaker 2 3:25

So I was chatting to this guy and I was like, listen, go for a drive, I'll pick you up from your hotel because he was visiting and I'll just we can go for a walk. Anyway, picked him up, he was another top right, so I was very low expectations of what was actually going to happen.

Speaker 1 3:37

I was going to say like two tops, do not make a bottom.

Speaker 2 3:40

But quite often people say that they're tops when they are not.

Speaker 1 3:45

Why are you looking at me with those dagger eyes of yours when you say that?

Speaker 2 3:50

Because anyway. So I went to go pick him up from his hotel, saw him I was like, oh, actually it's really cute. Like his pictures were already like quite cute and really good balance, which is actually why I met him. Anyway, got in the car, went for a drive. Within like minutes we were laughing Very funny.

Speaker 2 4:11

He was a very like bear bear with me with this one. He's a very awkward person, but not in like a weird way. He just did things like he made like weird, like noises in an awkward way or like just laughed when there was a silence and it was. It was actually really like adorable. Anyway, chat, chat, chat, chat. He had a boyfriend. So I was like okay, open relationship, that was absolutely fine. I said to him like does your boyfriend know that you meet other people? He said yes, we're all good. Got to the golf course and he turned to me and was like I'm actually in a bombing mood and I was like what do you mean by this? He was like I don't know, let's just go with it. So I didn't know if he meant like he literally wanted to get straight to it or if if planting the seed yeah, well, I did plant that seed if he was wanting me to be more dominant. I didn't really know. Anyway, hang just go back a sec.

Speaker 1 4:51

I don't know how we get from chatting someone on grinder going really well, really lovely. Suddenly we're at a golf course. Where did the golf course come into the mix?

Speaker 2 4:58

well, I said should we go for a drive? Because obviously when I'm back on the island I can't host, right. So it's either like an outdoor situation or his hotel room, which was an option. But he wanted to, like, look around the island. Okay, and it's a really beautiful golf course.

Speaker 1 5:12

It's public land tour guide benji, here we come, literally.

Speaker 2 5:16

I was like I can show you um a whole new hole in one as well um.

Speaker 2 5:24

So we got to the golf course, he was like, yeah, let's go for a walk. Feeling very submissive, I was like, okay, cool, went for a little walk. And he said again, like I just don't know why I'm away from my boyfriend. And he was like normally I'm the top and he's the bottom in the relationship. But I'm just feeling quite submissive and I was like really he was like, yeah, try me. So I said to him all right, take off all your clothes, leave them in the car and I'll walk you around the golf course with nothing on. And he was like all right. So he literally stripped what Turns out he was in a jockstrap. So I was like you can keep that on.

Speaker 2 5:56

I'd like to keep it on please. And I just literally walked him around this golf course in just a jockstrap, and his trainers.

Speaker 1 6:04

Now this is open to the public, right, correct, so anyone could walk by at any time.

Speaker 2 6:08

So it was nighttime and this particular golf course runs along the beach Right. So I had said to him I was like if we actually bump into anyone which is very unlikely we could just say we were going for a swim.

Speaker 1 6:19

Right.

Speaker 2 6:20

So yeah, and then I had a jacket on as well, so it's like really worst case scenario. I was giving my jacket and you'll look like you're in swimming trunks from the front.

Speaker 1 6:29

Not so much from the behind. Wow, okay, so you're walking along the golf course. Yeah, you went to the beach, you kissed on the beach and Dot dot dot.

Speaker 2 6:39

We never actually got to the beach. We were then making jokes about, honestly, the bounce was really good. I really actually enjoyed the chat with him, but we were making jokes about the holes. Oh, there's another hole. Oh, there's another hole, because it's a gut, of course. Well, we got to the next hole and he went and got on all fours over the hole.

Speaker 1 6:57

Oh, and said, and I quote here's your next hole. Yeah, podcasters, I'm not even joking. My mouth is to the floor right now and that's not the mdma, that is yeah.

Speaker 2 7:14

So I was like, oh, and he was like, well, come on then. So yeah, we just got to it.

Speaker 1 7:18

On the and how far did the golf chat go, were you like?

Speaker 2 7:21

well, luckily, I brought my club wink wink okay, gross, we're not icky like you he'd already laid up the joke and I I just took it well he took it yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 7:32

So we ended up having like sex on the golf course, um, and then didn't actually finish, carried on walking, just got at it, went at it again all around the golf course. It was wild, wow, yeah. And then, after we'd like finished and got to the car, etc. We carried on chatting, which again was really lovely, and he was like, oh, I'm actually in clapham quite often. I was like, oh, okay, that's interesting. And he was like, yeah, so is my boyfriend, do you want to come meet him sometime? And I was like, yes, yes, I do. So I'm hoping at some point we will meet up again, maybe the three of us, who knows, who knows? But it was super fun and you know me, I liked you very sexually explorative uh-huh and this was yeah, it was good fun that is a story and a half.

Speaker 1 8:16

Yeah, because I actually just got up the group chat now did you get it up?

Speaker 2 8:19

that's very quick for you to get it up. It's always up. I wouldn't say that ready to go.

Speaker 1 8:24

Um. So you said, golf course, and I said can't wait for this story. And then you replied with I did damage myself, though now out of action for a bit, haha, okay I'd forgotten. I'd said that thank you so much for showing up the podcast oh gosh.

Speaker 2 8:41

So because he was a top, I didn't bring all the things I would normally bring as in lube, exactly. So I had condom, I had a condom in my pocket, but I didn't have any lube. And what did you use? Well, yeah, but clearly not not enough, and we were playing around and I hadn't. Actually, I'm very safe with these sorts of things, right, it's why I've still never had like an sti or an std. I'm very safe with these things, but I was playing around. It's why I've still never had like an STI or an STD. I'm very safe with these things, but I was playing around without the condom on and obviously no lube, and there was a certain accident that happened and he did really like wrench me quite hard and after that I put the condom on and it was fine, but then you know like I think maybe it was the adrenaline as the evening got on, I got home into bed.

Speaker 2 9:26

I was like I'm actually kind of sore and yeah, there was some um painful things that had happened. Let's just put it that way. Were you red raw? It wasn't just red raw. Certain things had had had had ripped. Oh, your banjo? No, it wasn't my banjo, I don't, there's no need to go into it, but let's just say it was just a little bit sore. So, yeah, I was out for a few days.

Speaker 1 9:45

Are you fully recovered? Oh, fully recovered.

Speaker 2 9:48

Tried and tested more and more. I'm fine, back at the golf course. Well, no, not back to the golf course. I don't like to revisit these things. But, yeah, I'm fine now. But it was a painful situation. Always use l. So do you now need to carry those um lube packets with you as well as condom? Well, I normally do carry lube or at least oil with me. Oil, yes, oil. Why do people? It's just like the bottoms I talked on grinder. They're like oil. Yes, it's so much better, not some oil. Some oils will actually deteriorate the condom right some oils.

Speaker 1 10:19

Good to know what I always is good to use in that situation people think, use baby oil.

Speaker 2 10:24

Do not use baby oil. And did you know baby oil is actually really bad for your face? Fun fact you know, I'm in skincare. Baby oil is a mineral oil, which is a man-made oil. It's not a plant-based oil. So actually it's really bad for you, right? So it will break down lots of things, including the natural oils on your skin, but also things like condoms certain brands, brands of condoms anyway Baby oil will actually. They'll break.

Speaker 1 10:47

So I'm actually genuinely intrigued by this. What oil would you use?

Speaker 2 10:51

Well, look, I'm not going to say what oil. I'm going to say go and research it yourself, because I don't want to say, use an oil and then you have an issue with it. But plant-based oils are less likely to break down the compounds that make condoms, particularly if they're condoms that come with like a lube on. You know, sometimes they do oh, yeah, yeah, yeah they can react with oils and they can yeah, you can break the condom so be safe.

Speaker 1 11:13

Wow, I have learned so much already in the first 10 minutes of this episode. You are welcome. Thank you for sharing your knowledge and your experience and your wisdom.

Speaker 2 11:20

Just you enjoy your bottoming stages. Got the oil because you've been playing being a top for way too long.

Speaker 1 11:31

Well, thank you so much for that lovely story. I also have a story for you as well. What's the story about. Amore, well, a friend of mine.

Speaker 2 11:39

Wait, wait, wait, you have other friends.

Speaker 1 11:41

I do Sorry about that. I hate them already. But a friend of mine did give me a call and was like brad, I've got a story to share with you that I think you would love, and you're welcome, to use on the podcast. I was like, oh my goodness, give me the goss, oh, lord. So he had a grinder hook up.

Speaker 2 11:58

Come around, I know you like those I mean I'd also love a husband at some point, but yeah, at the moment, grinder is all I have.

Speaker 1 12:03

Yeah and uh. So this hookup went to his house. They were getting on getting a bit kinky and then this hookup said oh, do you have any toys?

Speaker 2 12:13

so let's do play with toys, great fine buzz light year yeah, whatever's going woody barbie yeah, any of that and, uh, my friend actually didn't.

Speaker 1 12:23

So theup said what about anything from your fridge that we could use?

Speaker 2 12:27

No, I've been here.

Unusual Items in the Bum

Speaker 1 12:29

Have you? I've been here. What did you use on the fridge Carrot? You used a carrot on someone. Yeah, how did that go they? Loved it Wow.

Speaker 2 12:38

Quite a big carrot. There was a cucumber. I did have a cucumber, but I wanted it for my lunch for the next day. I did have a cucumber, but I wanted it for my lunch for the next day.

Speaker 1 12:45

That was honestly a true story wow, sorry you can't have this.

Speaker 2 12:47

It's for my lunch. Yeah, sorry, I'm skinny these days.

Speaker 1 12:50

Come on zen pic. It was way before I zen bit yeah, I didn't want to give up my cucumber oh my goodness yeah, so here's a carrot well, anyway, my friend only had a courgette in the fridge, so the guy was like, cool, let's use the courgette anyway they were playing with the condom right on the courgette, because courgettes, I don't know if you realize, are actually quite prickly I did ask did you put a condom on? He said no, I know. Yes, I pulled that same face as well when he told me the story.

Speaker 2 13:16

Okay, well, okay, carry on. So he was getting zucchini yeah, it was all happening actually for american listeners, a courgette is a zucchini. Yeah, yeah um.

Speaker 1 13:28

So basically, he had a courgette up his ass and it.

Speaker 2 13:32

Oh, just when you say things, it really hits me hard in a good way no, not at all, something I need to talk to my therapist. Something triggers inside me when you say things like this. It makes me look sick.

Speaker 1 13:44

Well, I'm sorry to say, the courgette went up his arse.

Speaker 2 13:47

Did it come back out?

Speaker 1 13:47

No, it was gone Stuck. They were trying to pull it out and they could not get this bloody courgette out. So my friend had to go to A&E and they had to get a doctor come and tweezer it out with. What's it called? What are those out with? Um? What's it called what? Those like forceps? Is that what they're called? Yeah, what do you call when you're on a barbecue? And you've got like the the tongs tongs yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 14:11

What do you call those tongs?

Speaker 1 14:12

they're tongs, oh yeah so, yeah, my friend had to go to a and e get all properly surgically removed a courgette up his ass. Wow, wow, I, I think I'd find that quite humiliating.

Speaker 2 14:21

yeah, yeah, did he get the courgette back, washed it off, use it for his dinner the next day and Wow, wow. I think I'd find that quite humiliating.

Speaker 1 14:25

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 14:26

Did he get the courgette back?

Speaker 1 14:28

Washed it off, used it for his dinner the next day, and then I used it for sick. I don't care, I don't care. Yeah, so he went to A&E. Now I also have another friend of mine, because you have a lot of friends.

Speaker 2 14:38

I do, I do Is this like one of those? Things where actually the was you no, like my friend one time sat on a bottle and should that friend wink wink want to get that bottle back out of his rectum, wink wink would you help him wait.

Speaker 1 14:56

Where's that whisper an angel bottle gone legit. Um so another friend of mine his friend worked for, uh, the ambulance and we were chatting at his birthday and I was like, oh my goodness, you're an ambulance driver like tell me everything. Like what's been one of the most like crazy stories. He said that they got a call, went to this guy's house. He had used a toilet brush up his ass. The bristly end, ouch, ouch, got stuck. So he obviously called the ambulance. Do you know what he told the ambulance? He fell.

Speaker 2 15:28

I slipped in the bathroom and fell on the toilet brush apparently that is the number one like reason that people give for things getting stuck up them yeah, this guy said the same as like. We've heard that story a million times people have like toy cars and stuff like remote control. It's like, oh, I slipped and sat on it yeah sorry, darling, I don't slip and sit on anything like. How loose are you?

Speaker 1 15:47

right. So they obviously like picked him off the ambulance that took him. But obviously he was laying on the bed in the ambulance, face down with the brush like sticking out.

Speaker 1 15:55

Oh, my gosh they had a cover over the the brush, so it was like like a tent. Basically they then called his wife to be like your husband's in a and a do you want to come and be here so you can take him home? And apparently when the wife turned up, obviously the guy had the brush still sticking out his arse and she was like what have you done now? As if, like that was a normal thing that happened in that relationship.

Speaker 2 16:17

So he's always shoving stuff up his bum. Always guys do like that a toilet brush no, no, like things up their bum.

Speaker 1 16:28

Oh, I know one particular relationship which the guy can only finish by having something up his bum like a straight relationship yeah, yeah, yeah yeah so when he's having sex with the girl, she's got to shove something up their bum a toy or a finger or something nice.

Speaker 2 16:38

Yeah, yeah, nice, nice straight lads kind of into them at the moment, are you a little bit? Yeah, nice yeah so anyway.

Speaker 1 16:46

so so that's stories about what to put up your bum, so I thought I'd ask you the question.

Speaker 2 16:49

Well, rather what? Not to put up your bum, but yes, please do not go at home, but like, lick your toilet brush.

Speaker 1 16:56

Oh, my goodness, that's a good time. Hell, no, hell no.

Speaker 2 16:59

Also really dirty or the infection anyway. What were you gonna say?

Speaker 1 17:03

have you ever put anything up your bum?

Speaker 2 17:04

that's maybe not the ordinary why do I always get landed with these questions first?

Speaker 2 17:11

that isn't in the ordinary so obviously ordinary is either a penis, a finger or like a toy that's designed for that yeah I do think I've put some sort of vegetable up before, because I feel like that's why I use the carrot, because I was like I know that you can use this so you've also sat on a carrot. I would have sat on a carrot. Maybe I've tried with a carrot a very long time ago. Listen, I'm very comfortable with just being a top. I don't really like things up there no no, a fingernail and then fine, nothing else. I think maybe I might have used a carrot at some point, but I love this.

Speaker 1 17:43

I think, maybe not quite sure, but maybe I use the carrot maybe I use the carrot.

Speaker 2 17:50

What about you? What have you used?

Speaker 1 17:52

fucking traffic code beep, beep no parking here.

Speaker 2 18:03

It was orange when it went in, but it was not orange when it came out.

Speaker 1 18:10

I've got the giggles.

Speaker 2 18:12

Sorry if you're having dinner right now. Podcasters.

Speaker 1 18:16

When I was younger, I actually used a pen once.

Speaker 2 18:18

Like a biro. Yeah, just out of curiosity. Wow, be a bit ambitious.

Speaker 1 18:22

I know it's boring, isn't it? In comparison, I bet you didn't even feel it Still up there right now. That's how I sign autographs.

Speaker 2 18:31

You've never been asked for your autograph.

Speaker 1 18:32

No true.

Speaker 2 18:35

Can you just?

Speaker 1 18:37

You want an autograph? Yeah, no worries, let me just pull my pants down and pen is ready to go. Not the first time you've done that, that is true.

Speaker 2 18:43

In fact, sometimes you don't pull them down, you sort of rip them open from behind, especially when you're performing for cheeky girls, now a friend of ours.

Speaker 1 18:52

I have to share this story because I also said the same story. It's like what weird thing have you put up your bum? I feel like most gay men at some point have tried something a little bit Out of the ordinary up their bum, right For sure. So I asked my friend what about you? And he said a mop, but the handle of a mop that was in his bathrobe.

Speaker 2 19:08

Well, I would hope it was the handle of a mop rather than the actual mop head.

Speaker 1 19:11

But you said it had a hook on it and it really hurt.

Speaker 2 19:16

I mean sorry, no judgment, we never judge. Wow, come on, captain Hook, so we're going to play a game.

Speaker 1 19:29

I'm Peter Pan.

Speaker 2 19:29

And the mop is.

Speaker 1 19:30

Captain Hook oh, ouch, yeah. So he tells the story like, yeah, I don't know why I did that, but never again.

Speaker 2 19:35

I'm trying to think if I've got any stories of people putting weird things up there. I don't think anything beats a mop hook.

Speaker 1 19:40

A mop hook, yeah, so obviously we've had a courgette, yeah, yeah. So obviously we've had a courgette, yeah, carrot, we've had a carrot Toilet brush. I think is probably the worst Bristle end.

Speaker 2 19:48

Remote control. I've heard Remote control, Obviously pen.

Friends With Benefits Dilemma

Speaker 1 19:50

that's nothing really in comparison. I feel quite tame. My friend, obviously the mop hook. So, podcasters, we want to hear from you.

Speaker 2 19:59

Oh my gosh, I did not agree to this Pod. To know what have you put up, your bum?

Speaker 1 20:04

we'll share that on the podcast. It'll be totally anonymous, so you can get rid of your cheeky secrets. You can go wild, absolutely so. Let us know what have you put up, your bum?

Speaker 2 20:13

that's out of the ordinary oh gosh, I really feel like we've taken a turn in season six, but all right. Well, whilst you're thinking about what you've put up your bum and actually, more realistically, what you want to tell us you've put up your bum, we're gonna take a little break. So, podcasters, it is time for queer diary we haven't worked on the uh jingle yet, but we're gonna work on that I feel like every week you're workshopping a new jingle.

Speaker 1 20:41

We're gonna get it by the end of the season sure, um.

Speaker 2 20:46

So this week's queer diary input is from um. We're keeping it anonymous, aren't we? Yes, sorry, yes, yes, we certainly are sorry, I'm sorry, don't reveal the secrets so from someone who I've seen have liked stories in the past, are clearly a avid listener, so thank you so much for writing in. And this is their diary question what's your voice? You want me to read in?

Speaker 1 21:09

oh, um, I feel like soft, like I'm gonna go to bed and I'm just gonna read a little chapter of my book before I go to bed.

Speaker 2 21:16

Okay, will I get some music? Yeah, okay, soft, soft, soft. Queer diary About a year ago. Okay, it's really hard to do soft after a couple of bottles of wine, but we're going to go with this. About a year ago, my best friend and I decided to upgrade our friendship status to friends with benefits, something you've been wanting to do with me for a while. And I keep saying no, ew, ew, how dare you? Naturally, feelings got involved, but we decided to keep things the way they were Casual, no strings attached. Fast forward to now and he's started dating someone else. Oh, but he's being all secretive about it. It presumably in an effort to avoid any awkwardness and spare my feelings. However, not only do I feel I've lost a lover, oh, but also my best friend. Any advice, perhaps, on how to bump off the new partner and make it look like an accident? I hope you're both doing well and excited to see the new podcast oh, that's really sweet um.

Speaker 2 22:29

First of all, murder is never a good reason for anything, so do not bump off the new. That is a really interesting one actually. I like I've actually said before like recently I've been trying, like with grinder and whatnot, to try and find friends with benefit vibes, but it's going in with the friends with benefits. I don't think I have any. I don't think I have anyone that I've been friends with for a certain amount of time who's then turned into like a friend that I sleep with. For me I don't think that would actually ever work. Just because what I'm like not, maybe I can be quite jealous, maybe that's the thing. I'm very like protective and I don't know, probably because I'd be too scared that this situation would happen to me. I would catch feels while sleeping with them. I'm already a best friend with them, so I obviously get on with them really really well, yes, but then I'm still not quite good enough and they end up with somebody else. I don't know if I could do it yeah, that is a lot.

Speaker 2 23:20

I think sleeping with your best friend probably not don't look at me in the eyes when you say that but I'm looking at you with squinty eyes, to be like, I can't imagine this yeah, but when you say that all I can imagine is that night of our day where you're like straddling me oh, why you got that in your memory for obsessed.

Speaker 1 23:38

You're obsessed with me and I love it it's like burnt in my mind. I'm just gonna not look at you for a minute, so I carry on talking because it would be like if me and you started shagging now, wouldn't it best, friends shagging, and then I get a boyfriend and then you get jealous you wish I'd get jealous.

Speaker 2 24:03

I'd like. Thank no, sorry, we're making jokes, we're making a lie to it, but no, that is a really rough situation. I don't. I guess. My question is have you told your friend how you feel? Oh, goodness. Because, I mean, let's be honest, there is a small chance that the mate doesn't realise that you have feelings for him.

Speaker 1 24:20

This could be like one of those rom-com movies where it's a movie I, I want this to happen. I agree with benji on this one. I think you should say your feelings but say but I love you more as a friend regardless.

Speaker 2 24:32

So if you don't feel the same way, I still want our friendship yeah, or or you say to him I know you're being secretive about this new person you're seeing and it's absolutely fine if you're enjoying it, but I've been feeling for a while that actually friends with benefits isn't enough for me and I actually really have feels for you. I've loved you as like a best friend and now I feel like I'm loving you as a lover as well. And see where it goes. Who knows? And maybe the other person is just doing it to test the water with someone else to make them jealous oh yes, it's a Cinderella story.

Speaker 1 25:06

It really is. There's so many like Call Hilary Duff at the Cinderella story. But what if it goes horribly wrong? What if he says you know, I love you as best friend, but I also have these extra feelings for you. And then he turns around and says but I don't see you in that way. Oh my goodness.

Speaker 2 25:21

I mean, I don't actually know. Is that possible, though I don't know? If someone is your best mate, right, let's bring it closer to home, let's bring it back to me and you Although I'm going to try not to vomit If you've managed to get to the stage where someone is your best friend, and by best friend I mean like you tell them everything, they know your family, you tell them about the most like intimate parts of your life and whatever that entails for you. On top of that, there is clearly a physical attraction, which we don't have. But there is a physical attraction where you are sleeping together and if it's happening more than once, clearly you're both enjoying it.

Speaker 2 25:54

If you're then saying to them you like them, want to take it further, and they say I just don't see how they could say no to that. What else is it they want? What is it that you are not giving them? Because you're giving them everything. You're giving them best friend material, you're giving them sexual pleasure, uh-huh, attraction, what is it? And if they then turn around and be like something really pernickety and small, they're not for you anyway, darling.

Speaker 1 26:18

Okay, so I think, go in with the. You're my best friend and, regardless of whatever happens, I still want that. I think that should be the first line, see I?

Speaker 2 26:25

wouldn't do that, but carry on.

Speaker 1 26:26

Would you not? What would you say?

Speaker 2 26:27

I'd go and go listen. We've been best friends, we've been lovers. I really have feelings for you and I want everything.

Speaker 1 26:33

That's strong, that's strong.

Speaker 2 26:34

I don't feel like I could have anything but that. So it's either we try this as a relationship actually that sounds like I'm being dramatic. That's how I work, but I think this guy still wants the friendship I would be honest with him. That's my first question is how honest have you been with him? What?

Speaker 1 26:54

do you want and?

Speaker 2 26:54

whatever it is you want, make it clear yeah and go for it.

Speaker 1 26:56

Okay, good luck. Please let us know. We are rooting for you. We hope it goes amazingly. We are rooting for you and we want the cinderella story to happen.

Speaker 2 27:05

We do want the cinderella stories but yeah, actually genuinely, please do keep in touch. Do you know what? We're gonna send you a message now, anyway, and say that you've come on the podcast. Uh, well, your message has come on the podcast and, yeah, tell us what you do. I'm hooked, I'm really hurt. This is actually like good, sorry, we're not making fun out of your situation but like genuinely, this could happen to any one of us and I think whatever you do is the right move for you. Oh, I don't know. Anyway, sadly, podcasters, that's all we have time for in this week's episode of my big game podcast. If you don't already, please head over to our instagram it's at big game podcast or head over to our website, which is wwwi don't know why I keep saying that mybiggamepodcastcom and sign up for our mailing list and do you have a dilemma that you want to get off your chest, and so me and Benji can explore all the options.

Speaker 2 27:49

I thought you were going to say me and Benji can exploit it. That's what I thought you were going to say.

Speaker 1 27:53

Not exploit. Explore and look at all the options. Try and give you a bit of advice. Maybe we've been in that situation. We could help, or if not, we'll just see what we can do to assist you on that. Maybe help yeah, oh my goodness. But yes, slip into the DMs.

Speaker 2 28:08

But, like I said, podcast is all we have time for. On this week's episode of my Big Gay Podcast Until next time, see you next.

Speaker 1 28:14

Wednesday. So, benji, do you think you'll ever go back to the golf course again?

Speaker 2 28:21

Yeah, probably.

Speaker 1 28:22

Is this because you like a hole in one? Well, a little birdie told me it was a good place to go and how many boys do you think you could have in one night on the golf course?

Speaker 2 28:34

four if you go down to the tiger woods tonight, you're sure of the big surprise.