Resilience is the quality of being able to adapt to stressful life changes and “bouncing back” from hardship. Resilience is a response to tragedy, crisis, or other life-altering changes that allows us to move on despite the loss. As you prepare for the battles and challenges of life, you must develop the habit of resilience using two useful ingredients: personal resources and how you think.
2 Corinthians 4: 8-9:" We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; (2 Corinthians 4: 8-9)
Resilience is the quality of being able to adapt to stressful life changes and “bouncing back” from hardship. Resilience is a response to tragedy, crisis, or other life-altering changes that allows us to move on despite the loss. As you prepare for the battles and challenges of life, you must develop the habit of resilience using two useful ingredients: personal resources and how you think.
2 Corinthians 4: 8-9:" We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; (2 Corinthians 4: 8-9)
Ladies, your natural instinct is to worry. You worry about your children, your health, your relationship and everything else under the sun. It's a classic case of worrywart syndrome. If you tend to worry needlessly, you are not alone. Well, welcome to the she strives with faith podcast with her Berthena Jackson. Berthena is a two time divorcee, a single mother and war veteran who suffered from anxiety, but learned to let go and let God. Berthena will share captivating and down to earth conversations on how to strive by faith. Here's your host Berthena Jackson.
BERTHENA JACKSON:Hello, ladies, welcome back to the she strives with faith podcast, how are you? Hope you having a great day, it is so good to be able to chat with you again. You know, today was, I would say not a stressful day, but more like a day that challenged me. Reason being is because I'm a training technician. And we had a class that was taking place this morning. And the participants were reaching out to me to let me know that they could not access the class. Adobe Connect was not allowing them to access the class because there was something going on with the link. The link was broke. And I had no idea. And here it is the class is starting. We're running late. I'm wondering what the heck is going on. And it was a little stressful to say the least. But I was able to figure it out. It got done and people were able to get into the class. I sent them the new link. And all was well. But I'm telling you that they challenged me. And I had to, I had to figure out quickly what to do. And that's where resilience comes in. This is my plug into the episode we are going to be talking about resilience, like what is resilience, and we all got our own definition, right? We can look something up on Google, Google has a different definition. You know, you have your own definition, you ask a sister friend, or someone else, you ask a stranger on the street, they will give their own personal definition of resilience. But here's my definition. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks. Ladies, what I believe is that resilient women thrive and grow in the face of adversity, challenges and change. When you set out to intentionally engage in the habits of success, you can almost guarantee you will be challenged. And that's life. And those who are prepared for the battles. The big ones and the small ones are the ones who experience the most success on their journey. You have to intentionally consider your options, the best preparation and the support you'll need to achieve your vision and goals in the face of adversity. What I also believe is that resilience can be, can only be tested in the face of adversity or challenges. Ladies, you have got to go through something. If you want to realize what type of resilience you have, how resilient you are. And the woman who never accepts the challenge will never know how resilient she is. You got to embrace the challenge, okay? You just got to go for it. You be like, you got to say Come on, I'm ready. For real, I'm serious. You've got to go through some rough times to test your resilience and as you build your level of resilience, you will find yourself able to handle more and do so with more grace, peace and effectiveness without breaking down without losing it without getting completely stressed out. Okay, you bout ready to scream. But that's not going to happen because we we are going to be determined to have resilience. Resilience empowers you to be effective and efficient. Resilience allows you to navigate challenges and change and to survive and thrive in the face of whatever life throws your way. When you got resilience, it don't matter what is thrown your way. Girl you are able to handle it. You're able to stand up against the pressure, you don't give in, you don't quit. That's resilience. Okay, that's resilience. So here's the question, what empowers you to be resilient? That's a good question. Now, in my research, this is what I found to be true. Three foundational, there are three foundational ingredients for resilience. Now, you might think differently, you might have your own ideas you might even want to add to this list. But right now, the three that I saw in my research was genetics, genetics. Now, genetics is something that you cannot change, but you can manage it by cultivating the other two ingredients. So what is this thing that I'm talking about? Genetics? Yeah, well, genetic factors can have a huge impact on our lives. For one thing, some people are just naturally more positive than others, right? I know a lot of positive people in my life. And I would love for that to rub off on me. I tend to be very positive. But there are also some times where I find myself being a Debbie Downer. I think we can all say, yes, we've been there before, right? But positive emotion is known to strengthen, strengthen us and expand our ability to handle adversity. When you can intentionally create experiences that lead to positive emotion. You're much better person, right? You handle things a lot differently, you're less stressed to me if you can create those experiences where you have positive emotions. And for some people, it comes more naturally, I have friends that are just naturally positive, no matter what they're going through, no matter how bad the situation looks, they're still able to find the silver lining, they're still able to see hope. They don't let it get them down. Okay, I have friends that are like that. But I will say this, genetics can impact your resilience in other ways as well. Let's just say a woman is genetically predisposed to a particular illness, for example. And it's possible that those symptoms, the symptoms of that illness may not manifest themselves. until she finds herself in a stressful situation. When she's in that situation is when she will begin to see how resilient she is. And as I said before, resilience cannot be tested without a stressor, you're never going to know how resilient you are until you are under stress. That's it. So I always say embrace, embrace the stress, embrace the challenges. You may not like it, it's not pleasant all the time, but it will strengthen your resilience. Okay, so the second. The second ingredient for resilience is personal resources. Personal resources refers to your spiritual and emotional fortitude, your support system, preparedness, your finances, access to people, help and opportunities. It's really anything within your personal arena of influence that can help you overcome the challenges. Because the bottom line is that you cannot succeed without strong relationships to support you. We need covenant relationship, but we have to be wise and choosing those covenant relationships. Just don't join up and get support from just any and everybody, you know, make sure that you are connecting with the right people. And I will say this these relationships, they are critical for resilience, you've got to have these relationships in order to strengthen your resilience. Because when you have a battle to fight, let me tell you one thing, you do not want to be in that battle alone. You don't want to be the lone soldier on the battlefield. We need others, we need other people, we need a good support system. And then the final one is how you think. How you think. So again, we're talking about the three foundational ingredients for resilience. Number one, genetics, number two, personal resources. Number three, the final one how you think. So here it is, when you are faced with a stressful situation, a challenge or adversity. What do you say to yourself? Be honest, what do you say? What do you think about the situation at hand? Because what you think predicts how you feel, what you say and what you do in that situation. So when you intentionally think differently, you react differently. Here's an example. Let's just say there's an unfortunate domino effect of circumstances, that leads to financial devastation for your family, you lose your home, your credit is ruined, and you are just flat broke. Now as a human being, you would likely experience a range of emotions, I'm talking sadness, there can be some anger and frustration going on, for example, you may even feel hopeless. Okay. Your thoughts, my sisters can feed your emotions. Our thoughts, feed our emotions, and the thoughts that follow can be toxic. They're just toxic, they don't do us any good. I mean, take this for an example. This is how toxic our thoughts can be. We might say something like, everything I ever worked for is gone. I don't think I could ever get it back. Or we might say to ourselves, my life and career are over, I might as well give up and accept that I'm a failure. And here's another example. This is so embarrassing. I look like a fool to have ended up in this situation. I have lost my home, my finances are messed up. There is no way I can ask anybody for help. Because I don't want people to know, the crazy situation I'm in. Now, if these are the kinds of things that you say to yourself out loud, or even in your head, I mean, it's only natural that you might feel hopeless, because that's what you're thinking. That's your thought pattern. And thoughts lead to reactions, what you feel what you say and what you do. Now, let me say this, if you intentionally change what you say to yourself, or even in your head, you will change your reactions. If you find yourself thinking, counterproductive thoughts, like the ones I just mentioned, change those thoughts to something more productive, you have that power. So try reversing that negative mindset and replace it with words that are positive. Instead of being negative, say something like this. You know what, I made some mistakes. I'm going to learn from those mistakes so that I don't repeat them in the future. Or how about this? I choose to believe all things work together for good I am determined to come out of this situation stronger and wiser. Now, doesn't that sound so much better. Doesnt that give you hope that builds up your resilience for real? Here's the deal. What might you feel, say? Or do? If those were the thoughts you meditated on rather than the negative ones? What would happen? How would you feel if instead of saying something negative, you chose to say something positive? Most likely, I'm gonna tell you the truth here most likely, you will feel empowered and motivated to pick up the pieces and put your financial life back together. You would not be in this woe is me attitude. You will not be sitting around moping. And you know, feeling as if you you are in the worst situation ever, you will find a way to do something, you will find a way to make it right you will find a way to fix it. You will also feel grateful and hopeful rather than bitter and hopeless because you changed your thoughts from negative to positive. You have the power to change how you feel, what you say and what you do. It's up to you. Proverbs, Chapter 23, verse seven says, As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he. Ladies, take that to heart and practice positive thinking and you will see your resilience increase dramatically. I'm telling you, it works. It works. There are many opportunities for negative thinking to sabotage the success of our destiny and our purpose. You know, lots of opportunities. But when resilience becomes a part of who you are and how you operate, when you decide to make it a habit, it becomes a lot more easier to maintain a resilient spirit through the tough times. And I'm talking tough times, either personally, or professionally. You see, as you build your level of resilience by becoming more aware of your thoughts, and you intentionally think in a way that leads to productive, effective results in your life, you're going to see a huge dramatic change and your situation. Because, you know, God says there is power in the tongue, what we speak will happen, you know, we've got to be careful of the things that come out of our mouth, because they do impact. They do impact our life and everything concerning us. So we got to tear down those negative thoughts, tear down that stronghold and become more resilient, more hopeful, full of faith. Okay. Your thoughts are all of the things that you tell yourself about the stressor? Or the challenge you face? And let me ask you this, like, for real, if your thoughts were a billboard, what would they say? What would that billboard say? Don't allow your thoughts to control you,. We automatically want to go to the negative instead of the positive. So I want you to become more aware of those thought patterns so that you can pull them into the light and change them. Become aware of them. Your reactions are what you feel and say. Your reactions, are a result of your thoughts. Every reaction can be traced to a thought or multiple thoughts. Yeah, so if you change your thoughts, you'll change your reactions. When you choose thoughts of hope and faith, your reactions show you believe that something good is going to happen. You believe that God is going to change your situation, you believe that you're not going to stay where you are. You are resilient, resilient, women bounce back, resilient, women keep pushing, you don't give up, you stand firm, you keep going. When you choose thoughts of doubt and fear, you react with anxiety, paralysis, and your conversation shows your lack of hope and faith. But when you are resilient. When you are resilient, you show that you are brave and courageous, and that nothing is going to get in the way nothing is going to stop you you are unstoppable. And that is the attitude that we have to have. That is my definition of what it means to be a resilient woman. It's easy, ladies, we got this. We got it. We can do this. So that is the end of my rant. I thank you for listening in. I hope that it was helpful to you. I hope that you will share it with other women. And obviously, I'm always always going to be asking you if you want to reach out to me with your comments or feedback. I welcome that you can find me on Facebook at Berthena Celeste Jackson. I would love love, love to hear from you. And as always, you guys know that I have to walk you or even ask you if you know Jesus. And I haven't used this term before but there is a thing called the sinners prayer. And what that is, is a term, it's a Christian term for prayer. That is said when someone wants to repent of their sin is a prayer for someone who is asking God to forgive them. And they are stating their belief in the life death and saving resurrection of Jesus Christ. Ladies, beautiful ladies, beloved, Romans chapter 10, verses nine through 10 says that if you declare with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it with your heart that you believe in are justified. And it is with your mouth, that you profess your faith and are saved. So I asked you today, are you ready to give your heart to Jesus because He wants you to give his heart, your heart to Him, He wants you to come back to him. He is your first love. He cares about you. He loves you, He does not want you to stay in your sin. He doesn't want you to die. Without salvation, He doesn't want you to go to hell, because there really is a hell, whether we believe it or not. There is one, God talks about that in the Bible. You can read that for yourself. So listen, if you're ready, I want you to repeat after me, Lord, I admit I am a sinner. I need and want your forgiveness. I accept your death, as the penalty for my sin. And recognize that your mercy and grace is a gift you offer to me, because of your great love. not based on anything I have done, cleanse me and make me your child by faith. I receive you into my heart as the Son of God and as Savior and Lord of my life. From now on, help me live for you, with you in control. In your precious name, amen. Welcome to the family of God, you are going to have a phenomenal experience with God, you're going to see what God is going to do for you. You'll see the transformation. And your family and friends are going to notice the transformation in you as well. And they're going they're going to be wondering, oh my goodness, what is it about her, that is different? Well, it's because you've got the Holy Spirit. You've got Jesus in your life. Okay, so people are going to notice this new light that is in you. So again, welcome. I love you with the love of God. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. I wish you the best for the rest of the week. And I hope this episode was helpful. Again. I am signing off, and we will chat next week. Until next time, keep striving with faith. God bless you. Bye for now.
Unknown:Thank you for listening to the she strives with faith podcast. To hear more about how you can tap into the power of striving with faith. Join her next week. If you found value in the episode, give her a rating or tell a friend about the show. Follow Berthena on Facebook and Instagram for a more personal chat. Until next time, strive to keep faith alive.