I Need a Date for the Wedding

S2E10 | INTP, INTJ, IDGAF

• Gibbs & Shah • Season 2 • Episode 10

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In this episode, the lads kick things off with one of Gibbs' classic icebreakers and compare themselves with various animals. Next, they dive into the world of personality types, focusing on the Myers-Briggs test. Similar to their episode about astrology, they have A LOT of overlap - which is something that Gibbs finds unnerving and Shah finds hilarious.

Together, they explore how their personality types show up in their daily lives, from their quirks to how they handle challenges to how their Myers-Briggs types approach friendships and romantic relationships.

Finally, they explore the Enneagram system and its nine distinct types, bringing another layer to understanding their personality types - this time with a focus on how they approach the workplace. 

Until next time, go fuck off!

Gibbs:

We need a new intro to this at work.

Shah:

Okay, my icebreaker today there's. There's two versions of it. The one is just one animal to describe yourself. The other one is to pick three animals that describe yourself, based on land, sea and air that's a lot.

Gibbs:

All right, let's do it. One animal to describe myself I'd say octopus. They're supposed to be very intelligent creatures, they're supposed to be very playful and-.

Shah:

I don't like this because this is one of mine.

Gibbs:

They're playful and adaptable and you know tentacle porn.

Shah:

You don't strike me as someone that's flexible and you know tentacle porn.

Gibbs:

You don't strike me as someone that's flexible. For the three animals C would be octopus, air would be owl and you know, owls are actually really stupid. Land would be a snake.

Shah:

Is there a specific snake that you would be?

Gibbs:

Oh yeah, I'd be a viper. Vipers are fucking beautiful.

Shah:

Okay, so mine. For my general one, just if I had to pick one, it'd probably be a black domestic house cat. For Then for Okay, for C. For the three for C, it would be octopus. I hate that we have the same one Land. It would be raccoon, but that's because a lot of people have said that I'm a raccoon, mostly because I eat garbage For air. I think it would be a crow.

Gibbs:

I do feel like if you had to sum up Gibbs and Shaw's two human beings, it would probably be raccoon and snake.

Shah:

And raccoons got the cute little hands. I also have cute little hands.

Gibbs:

And they're shifty.

Shah:

I didn't want that on record.

Gibbs:

All right, so here we are back again, Gibbs and Shaw.

Speaker 3:

Ba-ba-ba-ba.

Gibbs:

The co-hosts of the wonderful podcast. I Need a Date for the Wedding.

Speaker 3:

It's podcast.

Gibbs:

Which is because it's been so long since we've talked about it. Gibbs' wedding, just so you know.

Shah:

Yeah, it's some wedding, you know.

Speaker 3:

In case you've forgotten, the wedding in question is Gibbs' wedding.

Shah:

It'll happen eventually. Okay, guys, if someone wants to plan it, it'll happen. If it's got to be us, it's going to be a minute.

Gibbs:

Now this episode similar to the last one. We are talking about our personalities, except this time, instead of astrology, we have different personality quizzes and assessments and things like that to give you a different perspective on us. We will probably start with the Myers-Briggs right after we remember to fulfill our contractual obligation to thank Olivia, kay and the Parkers for our theme music. If you don't know what Myers-Briggs is, the best way I can describe it to you is it's astrology for people who use LinkedIn Gibbs. I will let you give an actual overview of the Myers-briggs test and its personality types and whatever the fuck I don't know, I'm just saying stuff, take it away you're the person with the master's degree don't talk about that, it's embarrassing, um.

Shah:

So this is super brief because I don't really give a shit. If you want to learn more, just look, look it up. Like you have the internet, clearly. So there's two, four, six, eight that's how you do it Eight different letters, different combinations of these letters, and they go in pairs. So there's E and I, extroversion and introversion. Don't feel like that needs any explanation. Then there's sensing or intuition Do you prefer to focus on facts or like big picture kind of ideas and then there's T and F, which is thinking or feeling, taking an objective approach or an empathetic, kind of sympathetic approach in making decisions. And then there is j and p, which is judging or perceiving. Do you want to find closure or do you want to keep yourself open? That's all I'm really gonna give to you, because I just I want to get on with it already well, that definition works for us and our purposes, because I think that

Gibbs:

for our listeners. They just want to hear the results, so let's give the people what they're asking for.

Gibbs:

My personality type is INTP, tp, yes, my personality type is INTP, tp yes, t as in T and P as in P. That means introverted, intuitive thinking and perceiving. This personality type is sometimes called the logician, so INTP the logician are flexible thinkers who enjoy taking an unconventional approach to many aspects in life. They often seek out unlikely paths, mixing willingness to experiment with personal creativity. People with the INTP personality type pride themselves on their unique perspective and vigorous intellect. They can't help but puzzle over the mysteries of the universe, which may explain why some of the most influential philosophers and scientists of all time have been INTPs. Philosophers and scientists of all time have been INTPs. They're also incredibly creative and inventive, and they are not afraid to express their novel ways of thinking or to stand out from the crowd. The logician personality type often loses themselves in thought, which isn't necessarily a bad thing and it's not uncommon for them to drift off during conversations.

Shah:

Yeah, that tricks.

Gibbs:

I feel this, I felt this very, very deeply. That's my type. How about you, Gibbs? What's your personality type?

Shah:

I am very close to you, almost same-sies. I'm INTJ.

Gibbs:

Interesting.

Shah:

So introverted, intuitive thinking and judging because I'm so fucking judging this personality is the architect. People with the INTJ personality type. Architects are intellectually curious individuals with a deep-seated thirst for knowledge. They tend to value creative ingenuity is that how you say that? That feels right straightforward rationality and self-improvement. They consistently work toward enhancing intellectual abilities and are often driven by an intense desire to mask any and every topic that piques their interest. They pride themselves on their ability to think for themselves, not to mention their uncanny knack for seeing right through phoniness and hypocrisy.

Shah:

So, ever skeptical, intj personalities prefer to make their own discoveries In their quest to find better ways of doing things. They aren't afraid to break the rules or risk disapproval. In fact, they often rather enjoy it. But, as anyone with this personality type would tell you, a new idea isn't worth anything unless it actually works. They want to be successful, not just inventive. They bring a single-minded drive to their work, applying the full force of their insight, logic and willpower. They have little patience for anyone who tries to slow them down by enforcing pointless rules or offering poorly thought-out criticism, though astute observations are generally welcome. Okay, that's it.

Gibbs:

That all seems very, very, very accurate to me, the one thing that really stood out. I will say as someone who has been called both phony and a hypocrite by Gibbs on many- occasions I that doesn't.

Speaker 3:

I don't think I would do that as someone who has been called phony and a hypocrite on air pull it up.

Shah:

Pull up the proof it's very accurate yeah, I, I I do feel like this is accurate. I feel like yours is also very accurate. I'm surprised, honestly.

Gibbs:

If you remember, during the astrology episode, we had a lot of the same signs.

Shah:

Yeah.

Gibbs:

And same. Here we have three of the four letters are the same, and that also feels accurate for us, because I feel like with the two of us, the two of us are extremely similar in many, many ways, but the ways that we're not are very fucking different.

Shah:

They're so different. Please hold, I have to pee.

Gibbs:

There we go. I was waiting.

Shah:

It's been a minute, so I also spit up some of the phlegm I had.

Speaker 3:

That was wild. For a second second I'm sitting there thinking did you even leave the room? Did you just go? You just went, peed in the corner or something. It's like I glanced up and you were walking back. What like I like you walked away. I looked down at my phone. I glanced up you, you were walking back. What Like you walked away. I looked down at my phone. I glanced up You're walking back. I was like this is crazy.

Shah:

How long does it take to pee? Not that long.

Gibbs:

Oh, Jesus Christ man, All right. So a lot of people out there are familiar with Myers-Briggs and such and their personality types. They might even know their four letters.

Shah:

Sound off in the comments. Which one is yours? Actually, fucking don't.

Gibbs:

So the strengths and weaknesses of the logician, the INTP. In terms of my strengths, I am analytical, original, open-minded, curious and honest. In terms of my weaknesses, I am supposedly disconnected, insensitive, dissatisfied, overthinker and impatient. I would disagree with impatient. What are your strengths and weaknesses?

Shah:

um my strengths are um rationality, being informed, independent, determined, curious and original. Um weaknesses okay, I don't like this because it sounds too much like you arrogant, dismissive of emotions, overly critical, combative, socially clueless. I don't.

Speaker 3:

I don't agree. You are combative and you are socially clueless I don't think I'm socially clueless.

Shah:

I think I'm socially clue-ish you have to understand.

Speaker 3:

What you just heard is something that gibbs would say. Imagine a co-worker saying that out loud.

Shah:

A normal thing to say.

Gibbs:

Yeah, I'd say critical. You are a critical person.

Shah:

Yes, I am, and I'm often dismissive of emotions, but I don't like how it also reminds me of you. I don't like seeing myself in you. Okay, so, on the romantic relationship side of things, my personality type, the INTJ, approaches romance the way they do most challenges, strategically, with clear goals and a plan for achieving them, which is absolutely something I do, I think. Uh, my personality type is often at the risk of overlooking or misinterpreting the unpredictability of human nature and affection.

Shah:

We value depth, intelligence and unmitigated honesty, so the unspoken rules and social niceties of the dating world can seem useless or even insulting to us. Our refusal to play games can be a breath of fresh air when it comes to dating. The bad news, the bad news many romantic conventions exist for a reason often because they make people feel comfortable or special or intrigued, and because this personality type refuses to play along. They may find dating difficult, if not impossible, and so we aren't known for conventional shows of romance such as sending flowers or writing mushy notes when their partner shares strong feelings. We often default to shutting down or analyzing the situation, rather than simply listening and offering support for these personalities. Becoming comfortable with their partner's emotions and their own can take more than a little practice where is your partner right now?

Speaker 3:

busy. I would love to get his perspective on everything you just read.

Shah:

He's busy.

Gibbs:

For my personality type we may seem cerebral and reserved, but once we let our guard down, we have a playful, creative side as well. Creative side as well as introverts. We appreciate alone time, but that doesn't mean we don't crave companionship. For people of my personality type, the ideal romantic partner isn't just someone to pass the time with, but an equal who can challenge our ideas. Intp personalities approach our romantic relationships much like we approach intellectual problems, with analysis, curiosity and a desire to understand the underlying mechanisms. For us, a partner is not just a romantic interest but also a fascinating subject of study, an enigma full of complexities waiting to be unraveled.

Gibbs:

We take our romantic relationships seriously, but we don't tend to stress about traditional labels and other dating formalities. Now, when it comes to conflict, navigating conflict in relationships, we are especially prone to shutting down when emotional disagreements arise. The thing that really felt right to me was all the initial stuff about wanting a partner who challenges me and pushes me and isn't equal, even a superior in some ways. And also, this is very fucking similar, Right, everything that was just read there is extremely similar to what my star charts very fucking similar. And again, it's someone who doesn't put much stock in astrology. This is, this is wild um.

Shah:

So one of the things I thought was interesting and that I agree with is, like when I talked that in like romantic relationships you're like cerebral and reserved, but that, like, once you get to know somebody or comfortable with them, you can be playful and creative.

Gibbs:

If my friends think I irritate them and troll them. Oh my God, my partners have it so much worse.

Shah:

Sometimes my partner's like I don't know why he's single. I'm like, yeah, I fucking do. Okay, you talked about this that you want someone that is like equal or like superior to you, but I wrote down like not just someone to pass time with, um, because like I remember you talking about that before, you don't just want to watch tv or just hang out with somebody. Like you want to talk to someone, you want to do things with somebody again.

Gibbs:

I value my alone time. I value my time in my own head. So if I have to come out of my head to speak with you and deal with you and be around you, it better be for a good fucking reason, you know, douche but it's actually let me, let me rephrase everything I just said okay, okay um, to make it more, you know, palatable. Yeah, yeah, look, I really like the idea of if I'm going to bring someone into my life, I want to feel like that person is elevating my life and that I'm contributing to them, elevating their life.

Gibbs:

For me, it's that simple hell. If we're having, if we're having a netflix and chill night, let's watch a fucking bbc documentary and learn something together.

Shah:

You know that's cool.

Gibbs:

Let's watch love island hell, no, fuck, no, let's, let's watch bbc earth you're such a little cunt, it drives me nuts man, that's cool to me.

Shah:

Man, we're learning together, that's that you're such a pretentious little rectum and I fucking hate you that was such a mild thing I just said it was a garbage thing that you just said you've heard me say so much worse, yeah, I have, I have, and I can classify that as garbage as well got any other notes? Yes, I do. Um uh, the fact that it says that you shut down during emotional disagreements yeah, that tracked it's super trash for me so I'm on to friendships now.

Gibbs:

The intp personality type prize something above all in terms of friendships intellectual depth. Not everyone will meet our standards for a potential friend, but when someone does, the connection can spark instantly, surprising everyone who thought they had this seemingly distant personality type pegged Because we don't mind the company of our own thoughts. We don't surround ourselves with people just for the sake of it. When we do open up, we can be lively, imaginative friends who always have something interesting or unexpected to say. When friends come to us with problems or dilemmas, we are generally excited to help. Our personalities can be counted on to offer logical advice and rational solutions, turning even the messiest of situations into a pros and cons list. When it comes to emotional support or matters of the heart, people with my personality type may feel a bit out of their depth. So, as one of my few pals in this planet, do you consider me a friend?

Gibbs:

I do. I do not allow myself to have more than three friends at a time. You have taken up one of those three slots for the past few years.

Shah:

I do consider you 75% of a friend. I think that's being generous.

Gibbs:

Let's have this discussion right now Okay. It's always chafed me a little bit. Gibbs has two now. Okay, has always chafed me a little bit, gibbs has two friends, yes, and she always refers to her other friend as my best friend. Yes, like losing a competition in which there aren't many competitors it's always chafed me a bit in which there aren't many competitors.

Speaker 3:

That's always chafed me a bit. This is a direct insult to the other two people in this room.

Shah:

Yeah, never thought about it like that. Yeah, that's funny though, isn't it?

Gibbs:

There's a competition to be won, a superlative to be had. You, I, you, I, so you get it got it I want to hear your personality type in friendship and such okay, fine, oh, this is good.

Shah:

I'm gonna start off with the, with the good line, which is also the first line. Sharp-witted and darkly funny people with the intj personality type aren't everyone's cup of tea, and they're okay with that. For the most part, they don't really care about being considered cool. Um, intjs might have a reputation for being difficult to get to know, but it would be a mistake to label this personality type as antisocial or unfriendly. It's not always easy to befriend somebody with this personality type. They have little patience for social rules or expectations, and they would rather spend time alone than with someone who bores or irritates them. From the outside they might sound dismissive, but the truth is that they have a knack for finding friends in seemingly unlikely places.

Shah:

These personalities aren't particularly swayed by appearances or social status, so they aren't afraid to befriend people who might be thought of as outsiders by the mainstream. So in their friendships, as in other aspects of their lives, they prize independence. Social obligations can feel stifling. An ideal friendship is low. That's a chef's kiss right there. And then also, when sensitive or emotional situations arise, they may feel out of their depth. Oh, sounds familiar. They may feel out of their depth. Oh, sounds familiar.

Shah:

These personalities are used to feeling knowledgeable and capable, so this sudden cluelessness can be disorienting to them. The good news is that among friends they know and respect, intj personalities have no trouble relaxing and being themselves. Their sarcasm and witty banter may not be for everyone, especially people who struggle to read between the lines. Anyways, I'm witty and have good banter, so for career paths for me.

Shah:

The INTJ personality type are rarely satisfied by work that is too easy. They want a career that fires up their curiosity and leverages their intellect, allowing them to expand their prowess as they tackle meaningful challenges and problems. If a job description makes the average person think, wow, that sounds hard, then it might be a good fit for an INTJ. That sounds kind of douchey, but whatever. With their disdain for schmoozing and workplace politics, they may struggle to earn the favor of their bosses and colleagues. Over time, though, they develop abilities into a track record so good that it can't be ignored. They do believe that if they want something done right, they better do it themselves. But the other side of the coin is that they have little respect for anyone who gets ahead based on networking or nepotism rather than merit.

Gibbs:

Do you find that to be accurate?

Shah:

Sometimes yes, I am not good at playing workplace politics, that is for sure but also sometimes I'm very abrasive and I do alienate people, and I don't like to be bored.

Gibbs:

What's your dream job?

Shah:

I don't necessarily have like a position necessarily. You know that I would like love to do. I mostly just want to do good things and be good at it.

Gibbs:

Yeah, that's not a position, that's not even an actual answer.

Shah:

I said words in response to your question.

Gibbs:

You said words after I posed my question. Intps in the workplace. Freethinking and eccentric people with the INTP personality type may struggle to find jobs and career paths that really suit them. Personality type may struggle to find jobs and career paths that really suit them but with a little ingenuity, logicians can find work that takes full advantage of their strengths, including creativity, a passion for ideas and an innovative spirit I think that if you were ever like a, like an english professor or something, I think you will get fired for fucking your students uh I will not respond to this, because there's a every possibility I could end up teaching one day.

Gibbs:

But in terms of difficulties in the workplace, uh, supposedlyosedly. At times, people of my personality type may be difficult for our colleagues to understand. In fact, we're often turned off by the things that motivate other workers. Instead, we are driven by our own curiosity and our own high standards for ourselves. So that's it for Myers-Briggs. In short, I feel like this was extremely accurate. Gibbs not so much, even though from the outside in, I think it's highly, highly accurate.

Shah:

From the outside in. That's fine.

Gibbs:

Yes, and that's important, because I know you better than you know yourself.

Shah:

I hate you more than anyone.

Gibbs:

So that's it for Myers-Briggs, but that's not it for personality quizzes but wait, there's more, indeed, there is the enneagram whoo. I first encountered this on a dating app, some. Okay, I had never taken it I've of it.

Shah:

It did take me like a month for me to get around to taking it for this.

Gibbs:

If you're curious, if you're like us and are relatively new to what the Enneagram is, and you're wondering what the official? I did no research, research. So the Enneagram is a system of personality typing that describes patterns in how people interpret the world and manage their emotions. There are nine Enneagram personality types, each of which has their own key motivations and fears that largely guide their actions and decisions. No one is a pure personality type. Everyone is a unique mixture of a basic type and usually one of the two types adjacent to it. On the circumference of the Enneagram, one of the two types adjacent to your basic type is called your wing. Your basic type dominates your overall personality, while the wing complements it and adds important, sometimes contradictory, elements to your total personality. In other words, your wing is the second side of your personality. So my Enneagram personality type is number five. That is my basic type. What is your basic type Five?

Shah:

Really, I don't like this.

Gibbs:

You're number five too. I think this is wrong. You know what's funny.

Speaker 3:

You know what's funny.

Gibbs:

Five is actually supposedly the rarest personality type.

Shah:

I think this is wrong. I don't think it's accurate either.

Gibbs:

But let's take it a step further. Uh, I have a wing, I have a wing number, I am a five with four as my wing and gibbs I don't, I don't know which sounds fucking stupid, but I don't know. Because Gibbs took her test a couple of hours ago and she has not actually read through her results. We are going to be interpreting her results on air to figure out what her personality type actually is. That's going to be fun.

Shah:

Live to tape.

Gibbs:

But we do know that our basic personality type is the same. We are both personality type five. So let's explain what type five means. A neogram type five is also known as the investigator. We are supposedly perceptive, innovative, secretive and isolated. Fives seek understanding and knowledge and are more comfortable with data than other people. Our biggest fear is being overwhelmed by our needs or the needs of other people. Type fives are also supposedly cerebral and intense. We are alert, insightful and curious. We're able to concentrate and focus on developing complex ideas and skills. Independent, innovative and inventive. We can become preoccupied with our thoughts and imaginary constructs.

Shah:

I feel like cerebral and intense are words that you would use to describe yourself, but they're never words that I would ever think to use to describe myself.

Gibbs:

At our best we are visionary pioneers, often ahead of our time and able to see the world in entirely new ways, but does it say at your worst new ways, but does it say at your worst. Because four type fives are basic fears are being useless, being helpless or being incapable, that last one being incapable.

Shah:

If I were to describe my sort of deepest fears, that would feel more accurate because I don't think you have a fear of being useless, because I think you're you're done, you're kind of useless and it's like fine in a, in a nice way I mean that I don't care if other people find me useful. Let's put it that way yeah, like your goal is not to be useful yeah, no, my goal is to be acknowledged as being your goal is to be praised.

Speaker 3:

Let's be real uh, yes, 100, 100 000.

Gibbs:

Now, that's the basic overview of type 5. Before we dive into deeply to it, I do want us to discuss our wings.

Shah:

What do you mean? I still don't know.

Speaker 3:

I do want us to discuss our wings, which I feel like are very obvious.

Gibbs:

This happened in our star chart, this happened in our Myers-Briggs. Now this is happening in our Enneagram, where we overlap a lot. But we have very, very, very, very, very clear differences. To be more specific, I am a five wing four. I am the iconoclast.

Shah:

I like that.

Gibbs:

I like that name more than.

Shah:

I know that I do. It's so pretentious. Of course you would.

Gibbs:

The iconoclast can spend all day diving into their own universe trying to conquer new systems, systems. They want to understand everything that comes across their mind and won't leave any loose ends. All so very accurate to how I live. I spend most of my life in my head. That fits for me. We are typically always isolated, like mad scientists trying to reach a groundbreaking discovery. We put a lot of ourselves into that so that we can master our field. We don't need anyone else. That's why it's difficult to approach us. Our most basic fear is to be incapable or incompetent. Our basic desire is being an expert on something that shows the world how necessary and useful they are. This basic desire is directly connected to our permanent thinking and creativity.

Shah:

Cool. So the five wing six is the problem solver, I guess. So that means that suspicion and deep observation of the sixes is added to the naturally logical way of thinking of the fives. So I guess they're intuitive people with the ability of reading others to stay always a step ahead. First of all, I think I'm very bad at reading people. I'll go on. They are rational and logical and love to think of new ways to do things and do it well. They will actually thoroughly analyze the scenario and take every possibility into account before taking any steps. One of the most distinctive aspects of this subtype is that they are usually quite smart and clever and use their intelligence to protect themselves and detect possible threats. Oh no, this permanent alarm state makes them very reactive and sometimes a bit defensive.

Gibbs:

How do you feel about that?

Shah:

So lately, like I don't think I'm good at observing people, Lately my head has been on a swivel because I've been watching a lot of criminal minds. I'm afraid of being murdered, but other than that I generally don't pay attention to anything. I don't want that advertised. Actually, I'm gonna get fucking kidnapped.

Gibbs:

I can call it a quiz for the night. So far we have done the Myers-Briggs types, we've done the Enneagram, we've done all sorts of personality quizzes and even earlier this season we did the love languages quiz. But I feel like we are ignoring the elephant in the room. A psyche veil um a psyche vow well now that you mention it, I do have my psyche vow, my last psyche vow, somewhere in this room I do not for me.

Shah:

I don't have that in front of me oh, I do, I have't I.

Gibbs:

It's so hilarious. Yeah, we might actually read ours. Well, mine no okay, and so thanks for giving me that great idea for another episode I literally thought that's where you were going.

Speaker 3:

Nope okay, that's, but now that you mentioned it, that's a great idea, oh man, um no, we.

Gibbs:

We are ignoring the elephant in the room here. Extremely relevant, especially for us millennials. One could say only relevant to millennials. The ultimate personality quiz for us. Yes, it is time everyone no we have to do no a harry potter episode.

Shah:

As soon as you fucking said millennials, I knew yep, oh yeah, we have not done our.

Gibbs:

We have not revealed our Hogwarts houses. I think they're obvious but sure Go on. Yes, we have not revealed our Hogwarts houses and I think we should save that for next episode, where we will finally have our obligatory Harry Potter episode.

Shah:

Fuck JK Rowling, though Fuck a turf.

Gibbs:

So this is the point where we tell our listeners to fuck off.

Shah:

But not until after we plug our website.

Gibbs:

We don't have a website.

Shah:

But we do have social media.

Gibbs:

Follow me at ShamanThePoet.

Shah:

And I'm definitely not in games.

Gibbs:

Well, that's the end of the show.

Shah:

I go fuck off.