Ripples of Resilience

Episode 1: The Power of Pause: How Small Actions Create Ripples of Change

• Jana Marie Foundation • Season 1 • Episode 1

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How do we help young people navigate today's complex emotional landscape? The answer lies in building resilience—not just bouncing back from adversity, but developing the capacity to adapt to life's challenges as they happen.

Dr. Peter Montminy, clinical child psychologist and parenting coach from A Mindful Village, joins host Marisa Vicere, president and founder of Jana Marie Foundation, to explore this critical skill. They unpack what resilience really means: a combination of inner strengths (skills and mindset) and outer supports (social networks) that help children thrive despite difficulties. As Dr. Montminy explains, "Youth today are facing more stress, anxiety, and depression than ever before because the adult world has literally been downloaded on them at earlier and earlier ages."

The hosts introduce a powerful concept—"present, not perfect"—which liberates us all from impossible standards while focusing on what truly matters: showing up authentically for children. This presence creates the safety children need, not to avoid all risks, but to explore their world with confidence knowing they have support when needed. 

The episode concludes with a practical tool: "the power of the pause." This simple three-step approach helps adults check their intentions, regulate their emotions, and engage with children from a place of genuine presence rather than reactivity. By pausing, breathing, and connecting with our highest intentions for our children, we create meaningful interactions that ripple outward into lasting positive change.

Subscribe to Ripples of Resilience to join Jana Marie Foundation on this journey of supporting young minds through conversations that matter. Together, we'll explore strategies for stress management, emotional intelligence, difficult conversations, and self-care—because even the smallest actions can create waves of transformative change.

If you or someone you know is in crisis, call or text 988 for immediate support.

This podcast is brought to you by Jana Marie Foundation and A Mindful Village.

Jana Marie Foundation is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization located in State College, Pennsylvania which harnesses the power of creative expression and dialogue to spark conversations build connections, and promote mental health and wellbeing among young people and their communities. Learn more at Jana Marie Foundation.

A Mindful Village is Dr. Peter Montminy's private consulting practice dedicated to improving the mental health of kids and their caregivers. Learn more at A Mindful Village | Holistic Mental Health Care for Kids.

Music created by Ken Baxter.

(c) 2025. Jana Marie Foundation. All Rights Reserved.

This podcast was developed in part under a grant number SM090046 from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS). The views, policies, and opinions expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of SAMHSA, HHS or the Pennsylvania Department of Human Services.

Marisa Vicere:

Music, music.

Marisa Vicere:

Welcome to the Ripples of Resilience podcast by Jana Marie Foundation, where we dive into the heart of supporting young minds. I'm Marisa Vicere, president and founder of the Jana Marie Foundation, and I'm so glad you're on this journey with us. This podcast provides parents, caregivers and educators with tools and insights to support children's mental health, emotional resilience and well-being. Each episode covers strategies for fostering open communication, building resilience and creating safe nurturing environments where young people can thrive. And I'm not doing this alone. I'm joined by someone I deeply respect and have learned so much from over the years, Dr Peter Montminy, a clinical child psychologist and parenting coach from a mindful village. Welcome, Peter.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Thanks, Marisa. It's been a joy and an honor and a blast to create this space for us to explore these important issues for kids and their caregivers today. Glad to be here.

Marisa Vicere:

We're so glad to have you join us. And we're calling this Ripples of Resilience because we truly believe that small, intentional actions we take, even those simple conversations, can ripple outward to create big change in a young person's life. Can you share a little bit more about what we mean by resilience?

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Yeah, absolutely. Resilience people often have heard is like bouncing back from stress or adversity. But it's not just about bouncing back and being able to recover from adversity. It's really about being able to adapt to life stressors and challenges as they happen in the moment. And that strength that we draw from comes, I think, from two main sources that we can think about and we'll talk a lot about over our series, and that is your inner strength and skills that you've built up and your outer strength of supports and social networks. And it's so vital that we pay attention to both what kids bring on the inside to face stress and cope with it better, and what supports they have around them to help them cope with it better.

Marisa Vicere:

That's so important, looking at both inside and outside, when we're looking at resilience and how to keep our kids thriving in today's environment. Why do you think this is such an important issue right now?

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Yeah, great question. Honestly, we're in a time where kids are more connected digitally than ever, right? And yet feel disconnected and alone and isolated as much as ever as well. And in fact, frankly, many of us as adults, parents, and teachers feel that way too, sometimes, right? So the thing is, youth today are facing more stress, anxiety, depression than ever before, because, I say, the adult world has literally been downloaded on them at earlier and earlier ages and they're just carrying a lot more with them.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

But there is hope too in that, and the whole point of our Ripples of Resilience program here is that you can build the capacity to be with stress in a different way, learn how to ride the waves of stress. I said we can't stop the waves of stress any more than we can stop the ocean from coming ashore and we can learn how to ride or surf those waves with more ease and balance, rather than being swamped by it and feel like we're drowning in the stress. So the resilience skills we're going to talk about building in kids and the supports as caregivers we have for them, it's really about helping them be able to ride those waves better. It's vital right now more than ever.

Marisa Vicere:

And it's such an important message for parents and caregivers and educators. I know I felt different pressures myself as a parent and as somebody who's out there in the communities working with kids and always wondering if I'm doing the right thing or saying what needs to be said in those moments. And I think one of the things I've learned over time is that resilience isn't about having all of the answers. It's about creating space for connection, curiosity and even failure at different points in our life. And then, like you said, making sure that we're wrapped around the people in our lives to help them feel supported despite anything that they might be facing. And so, when we think about this podcast, Ripples of Resilience, how are we going to provide space to learn and to engage in these conversations and really show up in different kinds of ways for our kids?

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Yeah, you and I have talked before about this and we like this idea that it's not about being perfect. None of us have the perfect answers. There's no such thing as perfect parenting, teaching, therapists, psychologists, none of the above right. But it's not about being perfect. It's about being present and we really want to support one another and our communities for how we can be more fully present and engaged and there for our kids in strategic ways that really builds resilience. Absolutely. The kids need us to be present there. They need us, as adult caregivers, to believe in them, to see them and have them feel seen and safe.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Now, safe doesn't mean kept in bubble wrap. Safe includes a sense of inner confidence and safety that they're willing to take risks and explore their world and fail and make mistakes. So we're going to talk about this fine line between being so worried about keeping kids safe that we deprive them the opportunity to go out there, take some risks, get some emotional boo-boos, if you will, which is the only way you can build resilience. The only way you can build muscles is to stress them a little bit and then rest them. We'll talk about how to do that psychologically with kids as we go. Does that make sense?

Marisa Vicere:

It does and I love that phrase that you use "present, not perfect." Showing up and recognizing that we're all going to engaging in ways that show that we really care about our young people, and sometimes it's that showing up that can make that biggest difference.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Absolutely, and we will be talking, as the series goes on, over a wide range of topics and how we can show up and be present, if not perfect, for our kids to help them build resilience. We'll be talking about things like how to help kids manage stress and anxiety, how mindfulness and compassion play a pivotal role in that, how to navigate tough conversations, how to foster emotional intelligence, how to care for your own well-being as a parent or educator too, so key, so that's a sampling of things to come.

Marisa Vicere:

I love it. And at Jana Marie Foundation, we often say you don't have to be a mental health expert to make a difference, you just have to be willing to learn and to show up. And that's what this podcast is all about. Showing up, learning together and building resilience one moment, one, ripple at a time.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Beautiful. And we're doing that not alone or in separate little boats, but together. We are in this, together, figuring it out.

Marisa Vicere:

So important knowing that we're not alone with parenting or with engaging with our kids during this high-stressed world and environment that we live in.

Marisa Vicere:

Can you leave us with some practical takeaways where we can really start looking at how we can make a difference in our kids' lives and how we can already start building this resilience that we've been talking about?

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Yeah, sure, let's start today, and we want to be playful and purposeful with our conversations and each episode make sure we leave you with a few practical tips, right and tools you can use. So today we'll start with a very basic one that will have three parts in it. So bear with me, and we'll call it the power of the pause. The first thing you're doing, the rapid fire. Too much is going on. I can't, you know, I can't keep up. Blah, blah, blah. That both parents and kids are feeling is pushing the pause button. I don't have time to pause, peter, you don't understand? Yeah, I do understand, and we ignore the power of the pause at our peril, not to get too carried away with my alliteration fixation. But the power of the pause is to pause and, as we said, show up and be present to our kids and to listen to them. So how do we listen to them? We listen to them by being present in the way where we're attending to. Am I making eye contact or am I distracted and looking at my phone, or are they looking at their phone doing other things? Right, and the way to make eye contact isn't staring at them but a soft, caring gaze, right, we know when someone we feel is really present and attending to us. So can we pause and be present, show up with our eyes, with our facial expressions? And my posture? Am I open or closed and tense? Can I just pause, breathe and settle into this moment with my child and whatever it may be that they need to talk, or I want to talk to them, or they're're starting to have a tantrum, or they're being anxious about facing something they're withdrawing, whatever it is, the power of the pause is to first pause, be present with this caring presence of not just listening to the kiddo with our ears but with our hearts as well. And a precursor to that is to be intentional with the moment. So can we practice this week how to show up with our intentions for using this prompt, if you will.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

What is my highest intention in this moment with this kiddo? My intention is to get them to listen, or get them to open up, or to tell me this, or to do that. Pause, breathe. My highest intention is that I hope this conversation will help the child handle the situation better next time, or will help the child feel that they're really supported and loved and that they can count on us. The highest intention I have is that my child will know how much I care and wish for them to be strong out in the world and believe in them that they can be. When I retouch my true heart's wishes and deepest highest intention for my child, then a conversation, mundane as it may be, about homework, or we got to get our chores done or stop arguing with me, or we got to get out the door on time, can be pause, breathe. My intention is to be lovingly present with the kiddo and to coach and support them and being strong to face whatever they want. Then re-engage with pausing, listening and being present with the kiddo.

Marisa Vicere:

So powerful right that moment of pausing and kind of collecting ourself before really engaging with our kid or even anyone else that might be present in our lives and it can make a world of difference, and I know we're going to be talking about that in upcoming episodes as well; how important sometimes checking our own emotions and our own thermometer before engaging with others can really set those conversations up for success, and I think that's really what that power of pause can do. It can help us know am I in the correct space to be having this conversation right now, or do I even need a little bit of a timeout before I engage in and keep it going?

Dr. Peter Montminy:

That's beautiful to ask yourself am I in the right space, the headspace? Is it the time and place for us to have this conversation? And even if you just do that, again, that's getting real with your intentions first, yeah, maybe no, you know what, right now, now's not the time and for us to say, but we don't have time to do this pause. We don't have time not to, if we want to get the result of our kids being stronger in their capacity to face the everyday stressors that they do. The ripples of resilence is about building those positive ripple effects further out for the kids by pausing and being intentional with our interactions with the kids more than maybe we do now. Never perfectly.

Marisa Vicere:

So beautifully said. These are the ripples we're talking about - small acts that lead to those lasting impacts. So thank you so much, Peter, and thank you to everyone listening. We're so excited to have you on this journey with us. In our next episode, we'll be diving into mental health and what we mean by it and the ways that it can help us with building our resilience. Until then, take a deep breath, give yourself some grace and remember you are making a difference. Thank you, Peter, for joining us today.

Dr. Peter Montminy:

Absolutely Can't wait to see you next time.

Marisa Vicere:

Yes, thanks, and make sure you keep those ripples going. And to all of you, thank you for joining us on Ripples of Resilience. This podcast is brought to you by Jana Marie Foundation, where we're dedicated to opening minds and saving lives through conversations that matter, and by A Mindful Village, helping families and communities grow stronger through holistic mental health care for kids and their caregivers. If today's episode resonated with you, share it with your friend and don't forget to subscribe so you never miss a ripple. Together, let's keep showing up, speaking out and supporting the young minds who need us most. Until next time, take care and stay grounded and remember even the smallest actions can create waves of change. Thank you. MUSIC