Understanding Neurodiversity: Strengths, Needs, And Better Fits

What if the problem isn’t the child, but the match between their brain and the demands around them? We dive into neurodiversity with clinical child psychologist and parenting coach Dr. Peter Montminy to reframe “difference” as natural human variation and offer practical ways to help kids thrive at school and at home. From attention, emotion, and sensory processing to learning preferences and communication styles, we unpack why some brains soar with novelty and movement while others excel with structure and calm—and how to design for both.

Together, we trace the roots of the neurodiversity movement and why language matters for identity, confidence, and mental health. Dr. Montminy explains how temperament and environment interact, why labels can harm or help, and how a strengths-first mindset reduces stigma and bullying. Using ADHD as a case study, we outline specific strategies: chunking tasks into short sprints, using visual timers and checklists, adding brief breaks, connecting work to interests, and varying how kids take in information and show what they know. We also get real about shared responsibility—coaching children’s “grinding muscles” while adapting classrooms so no one feels singled out.

You’ll leave with a clear blueprint: celebrate what each mind does well, teach the skills that lag, and build environments with multiple paths to success. That shift—from “why are you different?” to “what do you need to thrive?”—empowers self-advocacy, strengthens resilience, and makes learning communities kinder and more effective for everyone. If this conversation sparks ideas or questions, share it with someone who cares about kids’ growth, then subscribe and leave a review to help more listeners find the show.

If you or someone you know is in crisis, call or text 988 for immediate support. 

This podcast is brought to you by Jana Marie Foundation and A Mindful Village. 

Jana Marie Foundation is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization located in State College, Pennsylvania which harnesses the power of creative expression and dialogue to spark conversations build connections, and promote mental health and wellbeing among young people and their communities. Learn more at Jana Marie Foundation.

A Mindful Village is Dr. Peter Montminy's private consulting practice dedicated to improving the mental health of kids and their caregivers. Learn more at A Mindful Village | Holistic Mental Health Care for Kids.

Music created by Ken Baxter. 

(c) 2025. Jana Marie Foundation. All Rights Reserved.

This podcast was developed in part under a grant number SM090046 from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS). The views, policies, and opinions expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of SAMHSA, HHS or the Pennsylvania Department of Human Services.

Transcript

Welcome And Today’s Focus

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 0:16

Welcome back to Ripples of Resilience, a podcast by Jana Marie Foundation, where we talk about the small intentional moments that create lasting waves of connection, confidence, and hope for children and teens. I'm your host, Marisa Vicere. Today, we're talking about the differences in our brains and how they are natural, valuable, and part of being human. In other words, we'll be talking about neurodiversity. Some brains move fast, some think deeply, some notice details, others miss, and some need more support to navigate the world. So as you listen today, we invite you to stay curious, open, and compassionate toward one another and toward yourself. I'm excited to explore this topic with our resident expert, Dr. Peter Montminy, a clinical child psychologist and parenting coach from a mindful village. Peter, welcome to the show.

Dr. Peter Montminy 1:10

Thanks, Marisa. Glad to be back.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 1:12

So let's start off with what we mean by neurodiversity. What is this all about?

Dr. Peter Montminy 1:18

Yeah, so neurodiversity is the term we use to recognize that neurological differences are natural, natural variations in the human brain rather than deficits or illnesses. It promotes the view that there's no single right way for a brain to function. Diverse thinking, learning, behaviors can be valuable in society and should be accepted more than rejected or stigmatized. So let's zoom out for a second and consider this basic question. Would you say there is variability in the human species, that there are many ways that we're the same, and yet there are many ways we're naturally different.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 1:54

Absolutely. We all come in different shapes and sizes.

Natural Variation In Brains

Dr. Peter Montminy 1:57

Yeah, exactly, right? And that applies to our personalities as well as our appearances, right? We intuitively know that some people are more sociable and outgoing, some are more private and shy. Doesn't mean one's good or one's bad, just means there's differences, not necessarily deficits. Some are more verbal thinking. They think and process information through words and language, while we know others that think more and express themselves more visually, spatially, artistically, right? Some of us are more focused and detail-oriented, some are more big picture thinkers, sometimes who get bored and distracted by the mundane details. Some of us get distracted more easily, some of us not so much. Some of us are more emotionally sensitive, moody, or emotionally reactive, with high highs and low lows. I tend to be more in that category, while some are more even-keeled or moderate with their reactions. Some use logic to problem solve, some figure things out more intuitively, some are more creative thinkers, some are critical thinkers. You get the idea. Some of us are more sensitive to sounds and lights and crowds and overstimulation, and it's too much for us. And some of us crave that stimulation and are seeking it, right? Doesn't mean good or bad. It means what's the match between your difference and the environmental demands, which we'll get to in a minute. But first we just recognize, and I keep saying some of us, some of us, because we all vary on these different dimensions of how the brain processes information and produces responses to the world. So again, neurodiversity is more about celebrating and appreciating these differences rather than pathologizing or stigmatizing them.

Causes: Temperament And Environment

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 3:36

I love this so much. In a world that often rewards one quote-unquote right way of thinking or learning or behaving, neurodiversity really reminds us that there's no single normal brain. There's just these differences, and each one of us brings something important to the table. So how does the neurodiversity come about or what causes it?

Dr. Peter Montminy 4:00

Yeah, there are natural differences that we're all born with genetically. So that's a major contribution here. Anyone who's ever raised more than one child can tell you that. You parent the same, but kids come and write different flavors again and might respond differently. So a good bit of this is due to what we call temperament, right? The more innate, naturally occurring tendencies for ways we think or feel or relate to others. However, as always, the environment can shape some of these predispositions to lean more in one direction or another. Traumatic events, especially, or significantly harmful early caregiving experiences, might rewire the brain. And these social influences can contribute to a pattern of either more, perhaps sometimes more distracted minds, more distressed emotions, more disruptive behavior tendencies, or more social disengagement. Among the important notion here is whether we're talking more biologically and or socially determined, and almost always it's a combination of the two, right? Either way, these variations in the human experience are natural, dare I say, even normal. It's about accepting this range of differences rather than determining one being right or wrong, and that the one we think is wrong needs to be cured. It doesn't put the onus on the individual as some fault or deficit, but rather a pattern of certain ways of being that may or may not match up with the demands of the environment. So we really can't talk about this in the abstract. It's how does that particular mind and how it works match up with the demands of the environment? And we can talk more about that in a minute, too.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 5:36

Absolutely. And that's so important to keep in mind because we all need different things to thrive. And neurodiversity just reminds us of that.

Dr. Peter Montminy 5:44

Right.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 5:45

And you hinted on this earlier, but don't some types of brains work better in some situations or conditions than others?

The Fit Between Brain And Context

Dr. Peter Montminy 5:53

Yeah, you've hit the nail on the head there. Very important point, right? So, first, a couple things to say about it. First, the neurodiversity movement, started by sociologist Judy Singer in the 1990s, focuses on the idea that those with neurodiverse brains suffer not because of their way of thinking is intrinsically deficient, but because the world is designed for the majority of neurotypical brains. And in fact, often the collective of what's considered to be kind of neuroatypical versus neurotypical is about the 80-20 rule or one in five individuals are thought to have neuroatypical or diverse ways of processing things. But again, it doesn't mean it's good or bad. It means you may have certain challenges in typical expectation environments. So anyway, what it emphasizes is the need for an empathic understanding of those differences. And it puts the responsibility more just on like curing the illness or deficit in the child, let's say, to what are ways we can empathize with this child's strengths and struggles and accommodate, accommodate the environment and make some adjustments to better match their strengths and needs. It doesn't put all the responsibility and blame on that one person. It's a collective responsibility for how do we meet in a way that's going to be more synergistic and positive for all of us, right? So that having been said, I tend to land in the middle, respecting both individual differences and empathizing with those differences, and expecting that we can coach a child on how to adapt to certain environments that may be more challenging for them, while also collectively, let's say with kids, parents, and teachers, though this also applies to adults in the workplace, and there's a whole set of literature and policies around that. But we'll focus mostly on kids still and say, yes, let's coach the kids up if they have trouble sustaining their attention and focus, or they feel a little socially awkward and communicate in a little different way than some of the other kids. Let's coach the kid on what they can do with it, and at the same time, write, let's, as caregivers for those kids, accommodate and adapt the environment so it doesn't feel so exclusionary to them. That's all. It's that simple idea, really. But we lose track of that idea too often.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 8:10

Absolutely. That really does make a lot of sense in general. Can you give us some more specific examples?

Movement Origins And Inclusion

Dr. Peter Montminy 8:18

Yeah. So sure. Let's think of youth who identify as neurodivergent in many different ways. Some of the common ones are those who may be diagnosed with or be adjacent to the diagnoses of ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, your various learning disabilities. You may have a verbal or nonverbal learning disability, difficulty reading or in the standard ways of reading, which is the key. OCD and Tourette's are also some genetically wired kind of differences and kind of being more rigid or focused on certain ways of being things and maybe narrow comfort zones that otherwise then can lead to compulsive or impulsive reactions, right? So let's just start with the ADHD one. Let me just zoom out again and ask you this question, or what I often say to people, I say, look, if we agree there's variability in the human species, which we already did, we can say on any one dimension of functioning in the world, you might be low, medium, or high on it. That's just one way to look at it, right? Absolutely. So let's take this. I'm going to give you this sentence, and then you could say, and you know, all our members out there listening can think, okay, the kiddo I'm thinking about right now, are they low, medium, or high on this skill? And that is the ability to sustain your attention and effort on dull, tedious tasks that aren't intrinsically interesting to you consistently and independently. And many of us may think, oh, I know someone who's very low on that dimension. And if you struggle to sustain your attention and effort on tasks that are dull or tedious to you, not interesting, and you have trouble consistently performing those situations or independently performing those situations, it's going to be a struggle for you in those situations. But you can absolutely shine in areas where you are interested in and where creativity or other modalities are involved. And so the challenge with school is often we have a certain set of expectations, right? It's more passive, still, quiet, relatively speaking, learning in the verbal channels that require busy work and repetition is oversimplifying, but is a common public school experience.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 10:38

Absolutely. And that is hard for some of us. Right.

Coaching Kids And Adapting Settings

ADHD As A Case Study

Dr. Peter Montminy 10:42

Exactly. Exactly. And somebody who may have an ADHD-like personality, people parents ask me all the time, well, are they going to grow out of it? Probably not necessarily. They'll still have, this is a neurological wiring or difference. They're going to still have these tendencies, but they can self-select into jobs, careers, marriages, collaborative endeavors with others where the need to do that, sustain your attention and effort on tedious tasks isn't impairing because you don't have to do that. You can go play to your strengths. In the meantime, how do we help a kid get through school where maybe their strengths and struggle profile doesn't match the demands of the environment? We say, okay, kiddo, let's coach you up on how to build up what I call your grinding muscles, your ability to do that a little bit more. And the main way I coach the kids on this is I say, let's figure out how you can get through this thing that you don't like or isn't easy for you, quicker and easier rather than longer and harder. So yeah, I understand you don't want to do this because it's boring to you. And let's figure out how you can do that work that you feel is boring quicker and easier so you can get to other stuff. And we put those little incentives or motivations in with the kid to coach them up. And then we have very practical executive function skill coaching things we can do, while at the same time making sure that we can adjust and accommodate the environment so they can show what they know better, right? And play to their strengths. So, for example, you might want to put that kid in more situations where you connect the task to areas of interest or novelty or creativity. Help them get curious and find the relevance to what they're doing. This is helpful for all learners. It's especially extra helpful for kids who maybe aren't connecting and getting turned on if it's not interesting to them. So we do a little tweak and we say, let's find an interest, let's kind of relate to this, or let's keep it novel and interesting as best we can. Vary the ways you can digest the information. Can the kid take in the information through reading or listening or viewing videos or moving around? And vary the ways that they can produce their work and show what they know again through various modalities, right? We can chunk the material and task into smaller units, like levels in a video game that keep them leveling up, leveling up, leveling up, you know? Difficult task, got it, mastery, level up, right? Adapt the environment to provide more frequent breaks or reinforcers. All these things, right, when we talk about them like this, sound like common sense. But are we approaching the kid with the ethos, the empathic viewpoint of, hey, you have real strengths and your brain works a little differently, so let's figure out how to accommodate the situation so you can show what you know and are capable of more easily and successfully. It doesn't mean we can always adapt every environment to every kid. Clearly we can't, which is why I think we have to still work on helping the kid deal with the reality of sometimes it's not going to adapt to the way you like to roll, so we have to build those muscles too. What I call working with the kid from the inside out and the adults from the outside in and keep working from both ends.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 13:55

I think that makes so much sense. And it's so important. I mean, we all have have different things that help us grow and thrive and shine and be the fullest individual that we can be. And when we can really work with both the student and with the adults around them, we can really help make sure this kid knows that they are seen and appreciated and celebrated for the unique individual that they are.

Dr. Peter Montminy 14:20

Yeah. Yeah. And if we create a collective consciousness like that, then we're making many adaptations or choices or offerings to everyone in the room. So it doesn't even have to be singling out the kid. It's so we're starting by naming, hey, we again all have strengths and struggles, true or false. We all roll a little differently. So we're gonna have some different options for how we do things and you play to your strength. Now you're responsible for learning what your strengths are. You're still responsible for curbing your difficulties. But we're gonna meet you in the middle and think collaboratively on what makes the most sense here. So every kid can shine.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 14:59

I love that. So, one more question. Why is this so important? Why bother thinking more in terms of neurodiverse brains rather than brain disorders or mental illness?

Practical Classroom Supports

Dr. Peter Montminy 15:10

Yeah, really glad you asked that. So let's you know, nail that down why this really does matter. Here's a few good reasons. The first one is it helps create a sense of positive identity and self-worth for these kids that maybe do beat to the a different drummer, right? Teaching children that their brains work differently, not wrongly, helps them build confidence and view their traits as strengths more than weaknesses. Do not underestimate the kids internalize the labels explicitly or implicitly, how we think about and name a kid, they're taking it in. So if we can be naming it as your brain rolls differently, doesn't mean good or bad. It means we've got to figure out how to roll in the world with that type of thinking. Then you start empowering the kid to meet it with a more positive sense of self. Related to that is the idea that we have reduced stigma and enhanced empathy. When we use this viewpoint, it fosters a more inclusive atmosphere in schools and social groups, can help to reduce bullying and help neurotypical children understand and support those neurodivergent peers, be a part of the solution, not the problem, right? It helps us also gain an understanding for parents and educators to provide more early supports and appropriate supports. The more we can identify the differences, focus on the strengths-based supports and effective strategies. That will help the kid again grow more empowered rather than just thinking we have to fix their deficits. Really interesting. There's a lot coming out now where it also has been shown, taking this viewpoint, to empower self-advocacy in kids. Kids who understand this is how my brain works, and it here's how it works similar to others, here's how it works different, are empowered. Again, I keep using that word here right now, why this is so important. They're better equipped to communicate what their needs are and to seek necessary accommodations in school and life. So it really promotes self-advocacy. And related to that, finally, is as you might imagine, if you're doing all those things, you're improving the general mental health. You're moving away from a deficit-based perspective, which then reduces shame and anxiety for that individual, leading to long-term better mental health.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 17:24

Thank you so much. I can really see how this builds resiliency. Yes. It's about shifting from asking, why are you different? to asking, what do you need to thrive? When we make space for different ways of thinking, feeling, and learning, we don't just support neurodivergent individuals. We create a kinder, more flexible world for everyone. And so as we wrap up today, do you have any concluding comments or takeaways that you really want to stress to our listeners?

Dr. Peter Montminy 18:07

With humane caring and reality, realistic. Realistic caring. Here's what's working, here's what's not. Let's figure it out together.

Marisa Vicere, Jana Marie Foundation 18:22

Perfect. Thank you so much, Peter, for sharing your insights with us today. This conversation really highlights how important it is to notice and understand the different ways our brain works. When we acknowledge and even celebrate those differences, we can help ourselves and others around us thrive. Until next time, I'm your host, Marisa Vicere. This podcast is brought to you by Jana Marie Foundation, where we're dedicated to opening minds and saving lives through conversations that matter. And by A Mindful Village, where Dr. Peter Montminy provides holistic mental health care for kids and their caregivers. If today's episode resonated with you, share it with a friend and don't forget to subscribe so you never miss a ripple. Together, let's keep showing up, speaking up, and supporting the young minds who need us most. Remember, even the smallest actions can create waves of change.