275. Team Norming - Establishing Etiquettes and Rules of the Road

What if the real unlock for high performance isn’t a big idea… but a steady beat?

This 4-part mini-series is all about Incredible Teams, using the Tuckman Team Dynamics model as inspiration for creating or sustaining great teamwork.

In this episode, we explore the Norming stage of team development- the quiet but crucial phase where discipline, awareness and consistency turn ‘getting by’ into dependable progress. Norming isn’t about being bland or rigid; it’s about establishing the rules of the road so teamwork feels lighter, clearer and more predictable.

We discuss why clear standards define what good looks like, how shared awareness helps teams spot pressure points early, and why consistency is one of the greatest enablers of trust. Disagreements don’t disappear, but they resolve cleanly. Feedback feels safer because boundaries are explicit and repair is expected. Roles and handovers are understood, so absences don’t derail momentum.

To make norming practical, we introduce Richard Beckhard’s GRIP model,  a simple framework to align Goals, Roles, Interpersonal norms and Processes. Used well, GRIP reduces friction, speeds up onboarding and strengthens new or evolving partnerships. We share how co-creating norms and revisiting them regularly can prevent drift and protect team rhythm.

A steady and practical listen for anyone who’s moved through storming and wants to lock in the gains. Because when the rules of the road are clear, teams stop navigating each other and start moving forward together.

Transcript

From Storming To What Comes Next

SPEAKER_00 0:00

You might talk to good game and you've resolved conflict, but like even in our personal relationships, the proofs in the pudding.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

It actually requires a level of discipline, I suppose, and awareness and consistency in order to enable that to happen and happen well.

SPEAKER_00 0:16

The benefit of the amazing Tuckman Team Dynamic Model is it enables us to see that teamwork, just like the seasons of change, one stage kind of begets the other. Dang.

SPEAKER_01 0:32

Law, are you alright? Yeah, doing well. How about you? Not bad, thank you. How's your week been? I hope you haven't been too busy storming and you're in the next phase.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Well, thanks to the reminder of not ignoring things but leaning into them, seeing it as not a reason to stop progressing forward, but actually that could be the enabler. Okay. Um, yeah, it's been a good week. Good.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

What's made it that good week then?

SPEAKER_00 0:57

Well, do you know I'm really enjoying this focus looking at what is the secret behind high-performing teams, whether you're based all together, whether you're distributed across different places, and where we looked at forming, so the importance of having that clear vision and clarity. Last episode looking at storming. So what happens if things are feeling messy and stressy? Yeah. And you'd sort of like to think that once you got those two things under your belt, game on, you know, um, amazing performance is guaranteed.

SPEAKER_01 1:27

However, is it though?

SPEAKER_00 1:29

Well, the benefit of the amazing Tuckman team dynamic model is it enables us to see that teamwork, just like the seasons of change, one um stage kind of begets the other. And what we're going to be focusing on this one is around how actually you might have talked a good game and you've resolved some conflicts, but like even in our personal relationships, the proof's in the pudding. Yeah. And this stage is what Tuckman called norm. Not Norman. No.

SPEAKER_01 2:01

I did get somebody asking me that, which means Norman will fix it. Who's Norman? It was very bizarre. No Norming.

Practice Makes Permanent

SPEAKER_00 2:08

So tell us what it is. Norming, love it. Um, well, I guess the premise that lies underneath it is practice makes permanent. Nice. So if as a team, let's say we were an orchestra and we form together, we've warmed up together in that storming stage, and now what does a world-class orchestra spend hours, if not days, if not months, doing rehearsing and practicing?

SPEAKER_01 2:32

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 2:32

Because at that point, you're establishing as a team, how do we operate together? How do we deal with some setbacks and what happens? So it then means a little bit like in fitness, you're the way to measure fitness is how quick it is to recover your resting heart rate. Yes. So a team fitness is let's say there's a challenge or an obstacle. Um, are we set up to be able to return to our default high standards of working? Okay. Because we've established those norms and those patterns.

SPEAKER_01 3:03

Oh, I like that actually. So are you saying that it actually requires a level of discipline, I suppose, and awareness and consistency in order to enable that to happen and happen well?

SPEAKER_00 3:14

Absolutely. And the thing is, Debs, is those words aren't particularly sexy words.

SPEAKER_01 3:20

No, I was thinking that.

The Conductor And Reluctant Leaders

SPEAKER_00 3:23

So not many leaders might sit there in a um, you know, in an interview and say, you know, what's the secret to my success? Yeah, discipline, consistency. Um, but could it be that this is um again one of the most essential parts of that team development uh journey? Because an orchestra, that's why an orchestra has a conductor.

SPEAKER_01 3:43

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 3:43

The conductor may not be the best player in the world, but the conductor is there to get the best out of all of the orchestra. Yeah. So keeping that eye out on what's going on over there, how's that link to over there? And sometimes I know when we use that conductor analogy, you see people really starting to buy into this because we've worked with people that consider themselves a reluctant leader. Yes. They don't want to be bossy, they don't want to micromanage, they don't want to micromanage. Um, but actually, in order to keep that beat and the and that rhythm, a world-class orchestra wouldn't dream of getting out there on a performance without a conductor. Because your conductor helps keep track on those norms and those default behaviours that the team practice makes permanent.

SPEAKER_01 4:30

Yeah, and I suppose in that case, if something goes a bit of a bum note, say, it's how quickly they recognise it and then can sort of adapt and adjust in the moment.

SPEAKER_00 4:40

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:41

And I guess that's then the d the discipline to be able to not let performance standards slide. Right. In in the safety world, there's a very well-known phrase, the standard that you walk past is the standard you accept.

SPEAKER_01 4:54

Yes.

Standards You Walk Past

SPEAKER_00 4:54

So actually keeping an eye out on what are those things that keep our team sharp and on point. You know, how does that link to um customer or client or patient expectations? So those norm that norming stage, it may not be the most exciting stage, like even in any skill acquisition, you know, practicing and rehearsing can feel quite boring, but we all know that 10,000 hours.

SPEAKER_01 5:19

Hours, yeah, the purposeful practice, right?

SPEAKER_00 5:21

Absolutely. And so you magnify that on a team perspective when you've got a collection of individuals who all know what I'm doing, what's expected of me, how I can then predict um uh my teammates around me, there's that trust and respect. And then you can hit us with anything. We'll be able to deal with any external noise because we know how to keep our own rhythm going.

SPEAKER_01 5:42

Yeah, I love that. And so if somebody isn't there on one day, it doesn't, the wheels don't fall off. Yes. You keep running along the road in the right way because somebody else can pick it up because they're very aware of what's happening and what's expected of them. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 5:57

Yes, Debs. Which of course is why we have teams in the first place.

SPEAKER_01 6:00

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 6:01

Because as nature would show us, you know, one sole animal can't do it alone. No, it's that power of the team, it keeps us stronger and safer. And um, you know, along the way, it might not be the most exciting stage, but back to what we were talking about on our forming episode. If you take the word teamwork, if you take the word team out of teamwork, yes, all you've got is work. Yeah. And who wants that, right? So being able to have that joy of teamwork and um, and of course, you get that joy and that ease when everyone knows what we're doing, yeah, how we go about that, and that's your norming stage.

SPEAKER_01 6:37

Well, I suppose it's not about being bland either, even though you said it might be a bit boring, it's not about having blandness around. There's still fun, right? Yeah, there's still emotional connection, and is there still trust, I suppose, because that relationship is getting better, deeper, more understanding. Yeah. So therefore, it's easier to get along with everybody. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 6:57

And and rather than being bland, that's a great catch. Actually, being able to work in harmony with each other, with um, you know, that synchronization, we're working in a really aerodynamic way, then you get your splashes of colour because we've got more capacity to be able to think a bit differently because we're working in more of those kind of automatic ways.

Joy Without Blandness

SPEAKER_01 7:17

Well, I love that. And then I suppose from there, if that's how it's working, it then goes into that next stage of Tuckman, which is the performing one, right? Yeah. And is that bit to recognise when are we doing that and acknowledging the people along the way so they feel they can still contribute, even though they might know their job like the back of their hand, they still have a reason to get up every morning. Yes. I love that.

From Norming To Performing

Rules Of The Road Explained

SPEAKER_00 7:38

So, shall we explore what this third of the four parts stage, um, team dynamics stage, is all about, this norming stage? Yes, let's. So, forming sets the destination, storming tests our resilience. The question now becomes how do we build momentum and make progress together? So, this is where the third stage comes in: norming. Norming is about establishing the rules of the road, the everyday ways of working that let a team move efficiently, safely, and with confidence. We're underway now, not just orientating, not reacting to every bump. Instead, we're agreeing how we drive together. Think of it like this: the lanes are marked, the speed limits are known, the signals are understood, communication catches lame incursions early. Trust lets us calmly challenge, adjust, and course correct. So norming isn't perfection, it's being unsurprised by each other. So, how do teams get here? Three things matter most: discipline, awareness, consistency. Discipline. Standards are understood. What good looks like is clear. No second guessing the rules or hidden tripwires. An awareness. We know what others are focused on, not to micromanage, but to collaborate intelligently, spot pressure points early, offer support, and avoid duplication and cross-purpose. Work gets smarter, not just harder. And consistency. Predictability is what enables trust, energy stabilizes, emotions happen because we're human, but we're not moody or volatile. Disagreements resolve cleanly without drama or fallout. In norming teams, feedback feels safer, boundaries are clearer, and repair happens faster. And that's when the momentum builds. With clear rules of the road, we stop watching the mirrors and we start looking ahead. So teamwork feels lighter, more fluid, and more dependable. And what this does is it sets the stage for something bigger, performing.

SPEAKER_01 10:06

So, Law, you know what? That was really cool. I really enjoyed listening to what you had to say there because some of that I'd absolutely forgotten. So, what do you think is the one thing that we can do that helps us through that norming stage?

Discipline, Awareness, Consistency

SPEAKER_00 10:20

In norming, grip builds clarity, cohesion, and strong norms. It aligns day-to-day work, it welcomes new teammates, and it strengthens partnerships. GRIP gives us a shared language for how we work together. So, this is Richard Beckhard's model, and the G stands for goals. What are we achieving now? And what are our current priorities and success measures? The R stands for roles, who's doing what? Where does ownership sit? Where do responsibilities overlap or hand over? The I stands for interpersonal, how do we communicate? How do we give feedback? What helps and what gets in the way? And the P stands for processes, how do we decide? How do we run meetings? How do we resolve issues when things go off plan? Used well, grip removes friction, reduces assumptions, and increases predictability. Collaboration feels lighter and intentional. So the gold standard, do a grip together. Quarterly works great. Co-create those norms, don't dictate them. If you're starting a new partnership, make grip the first agenda item. Let's align on how we work. One conversation now could save months later. So it's a chance to reflect. Where could a simple grip conversation help your team work more smoothly, confidently, and consistently now? When rules are shared and agreed, we stop navigating each other and we move forward together.

SPEAKER_01 12:01

I'm just going to pause the episode here for a second. Firstly, to say a huge thank you to everyone listening and watching the Secrets from a Coach podcast over the years. But also to let you all know that our latest Secrets Shared resource is available for you with our compliments on our website. Click the link in the description or scan the QR code you see on the screen now. Now let's get back to the episode.

SPEAKER_00 12:26

So, Debs, what do you think of our Norman? Oh my goodness.

Feedback, Trust, And Momentum

SPEAKER_01 12:31

I actually think it gave us, well, it certainly gave me food for thought. Because I think back to what we were saying, you know, we can sometimes forget how important that stage actually is if we're going to purposefully practice this stuff. And I think that's what I really love. So it becomes practice, becomes permanent, as you said. Um, and what I also loved is that it builds the trust, and the trust is strong enough for it to be able to deal with any wobbles that might happen. And the other thing I love was when you bought in your model Beckard's grip model. That's him, that's the one, and it goes really well. And that I think more than anything, that the clarity from norm in that norming phase creates the confidence within individuals, within the team, within the leader, you know, whoever is around. And that confidence breeds confidence, but you've got to keep practicing it.

SPEAKER_00 13:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:18

Loved it.

SPEAKER_00 13:19

Yeah. So Debs, in true secrets from a coach fashion, because wishful thinking, you know, it might feel all right, but it's the practice and the action that makes the difference. So what would be your call to action inspired from this norming stage?

SPEAKER_01 13:33

Oh, yeah, that's a really good one. I think my call to action would be have an awareness that you're not going off the boil. That would be my awareness, self-awareness that you're not going off the boil.

SPEAKER_00 13:45

Because actually, I loved it when you talked about how it might feel that things are easy, it are easing off, but to not let that drift into complacency.

SPEAKER_01 13:54

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 13:54

And I think that would be my share the secret. Let's say that you're having lots of conversations with a friend or colleague about three months ago about how everything was crazy and up in the air. Well, what that might mean is that it's round about this stage, a couple of months on, that you're in that norming stage and how to catch it so that then you don't drift into complacency. So get them to listen to this because it might not feel particularly exciting or um like you're sort of full of drama. So they're probably quite enjoying work at the moment. Yeah. Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed, but get them to listen to this as a reminder of the reason why an orchestra has a conductor is to help keep those norms and keep that rhythm going.

SPEAKER_01 14:36

Oh, I love that lore. Yeah, really enjoyed that one. And then we're going on to then the next stage, aren't we, as well?

SPEAKER_00 14:43

Absolutely, Debs, because as they say, it can be darkest before dawn. And the reason why we've gone through forming, storming, norming is to put in those foundations, get all that trust formed, as you said, to then enable the fourth stage of this four-stage team dynamic model, which is your performing stage. So looking forward to chatting about that, Law. Have a good one. Oh, you too. Love you. Love you. We hope you've enjoyed this podcast. We'd love to hear from you. Email us at contact at secretsfromaccoach.com or follow us on Insta or Facebook. If you're a Spotify listener, give us a rating as it's easier for people to find us. And if you want to know more, visit our website www.secretsfromaccoach.com and sign up for our newsletter. Here to cheer you on and help you thrive in the ever-changing world of work.