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Nearly Enlightened
Join Nearly Enlightened's host Giana Giarrusso and discover the body, mind and spirit connection! The Nearly Enlightened Podcast is for the soul-centered seeker who is on the path of personal growth and spiritual development. This podcast takes a light-hearted approach exploring topics rooted in themes of mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing.
Nearly Enlightened
Energy Ethics and Spiritual Hygiene with Danielle
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In this episode of Nearly Enlightened, I’m joined by Danielle Manseau for a powerful conversation on the ethics of energy work — how to protect your own field, work safely with others, and create grounding rituals that keep you clear, present, and effective.
We break down spiritual hygiene in real, approachable language and share practical tools to reset between sessions — even when you can’t burn incense or light a candle. Think: visualization, water, breath, a short walk, or simply closing your laptop as a mindful boundary.
Danielle and I also unpack ethical red flags in the healing space — from pressure sales and miracle promises to practitioners who override your consent. We get honest about why credentials, trauma-informed awareness, and scope of practice matter so much in hands-on fields like massage, cosmetology, and yoga.
Discernment is the heart of this episode. We also talk about the shadow side of hype and influence — why ethical readers frame outcomes as potentials, not predictions, and how staying anchored in your truth keeps your intuition strong.
And because energy ethics also means caring for yourself, we dive into burnout, capacity, and energetic seasonality — how to schedule with integrity and do no harm while preserving your craft and nervous system.
Whether you’re a practitioner or client, this conversation offers real, embodied guidance for protecting your energy and working (or receiving) from a place of integrity.
If you’ve ever left a “healing” session feeling worse — or if you’re ready to sharpen your discernment and deepen your energetic care without the fluff — this episode is for you.
🎧 Press play, share it with a friend, and leave a review to tell us what resonated most.
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Welcome to the Nearly Enlightened Podcast, a high-vibe toolbox designed to help you connect to your body, mind, and spirit. I am your host, Gianna Girusso, and I'm here to share tools, conversations, and insights to help you on your journey of self-discovery. This podcast is all about exploring what it means to live a conscious, connected, and nearly enlightened life because the truth is the answers aren't outside of us, they already lie within. Let's dive in. Today I'm joined again by Danielle from Venus Frising, and we have a very important, um, very important topic to talk about today. We, after we wrapped our last episode, we thought it would be important to talk about the ethics of energy work. Um, welcome back, Danielle.
SPEAKER_00:Thanks for having me.
SPEAKER_01:Oh my gosh, of course, anytime. So we want to talk about the ethics of energy work because um this is a very unregulated field, and what we're seeing a lot is um I think it's just any field in general, too.
SPEAKER_00:It doesn't like not even necessarily energy work. Like you could be a dentist and you still need to have good energy ethics. Like I learned that very quickly doing hair, and I don't think I understood because I was so sensitive and empathic that I didn't realize I was just like, I don't want to use the word contaminating, but like I wasn't practicing cleansing the energy of like my client before the other one until I was forced to like really understand, oh, you clean your station in between each person, and that's like the reset button.
SPEAKER_01:So I I and that goes for energetics as well. You're so right. Yeah, like I kind of do that at the end of classes too. Like when I'm cleaning up, like, yes, I'm physically cleaning, but also energetically cleaning. And you know, for me, like obviously, like I do burn sage and Palo Santo and those kind of things, but I have gotten away from even that in recent times because you could say it's like cultural appropriation, or like there's ethics involved in that as well, because some of the plants aren't being um cultivated and ethically sourced. Um so there's like I mean, this topic we could just talk about.
SPEAKER_00:There's so much to it, and there's so many different layers. There it really is, and I think like the most important layer that we were kind of discussing and what brought this topic on was just people running out and like being quick to do things before understanding it. And I guess like life is all about like some people are just the dive right in type, and we were also talking about because you're a licensed massage therapist, I'm a licensed cosmetologist. That gives us a literal license to touch people, and we were talking about kind of being trauma-informed, and like if you are gonna do Reiki or energy work on someone and touching the body, or you know, just being in that like close proximity with someone, like what are your credentials essentially? But on top of that, there is also like that energetic layer that is no matter what you're doing, whether you are an energy healer, a basketball coach, anything, like what are you doing to take precaution in between each client just to represent that kind of cleansing before stepping into the next thing? And I think it just comes down to like spiritual hygiene.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, yeah, and this is something that I definitely had to learn, like as a massage therapist, especially like when I first started um massaging, I worked for Massage MV, which is like basically like it is a factory for massage. So you know, you're working eight hours a day, you literally have like eight clients, and there's not a lot of turnaround, and you can't burn things in there. So there's no sage, no Palo Santo, no frankincense, no cleansing, these like outside cleansing uh agents. So you really had to get good at like visualizing and like imagining all that energy like being moved out or transmuted or like moving it somewhere else, like imagining it going out the back door because we couldn't open the doors, there were no windows. So I kind of had to get creative because as a spiritually and energetic sensitive person, like you would bring a lot of that shit home with you. And at the end of the day, I didn't realize like, oh my God, I'm feeling so crappy, I'm feeling so drained, I have a headache. Like I wasn't realizing like why that was happening. I mean, eventually I did, but in the beginning, it was really a learning curve of like what is what is happening. But when you're in people's energy fields like that all day long, multiple times a week, multiple times a day, you really have to get good at these practices. And on the other end of it, being somebody who's receiving, like I have experienced this as well. So before before I was even a massage therapist, there was somebody that I was going to for energy work. And it's really important to like look into people's credentials and to make sure that they're practicing from an ethical place. Um, because some of the things that I it took me, I was telling you before we started recording this podcast, it took me two years to kind of undo what that person did. And um, I think that's why discernment is really important. And I've talked about discernment on this podcast quite a bit, uh, especially as of recently, but being really discerning of who you're working with, because a lot of people in the energy sphere, they're pulling energy from like God knows where. And a lot of times it ain't God. So that is something that's something to be said too, and um something to be aware of, and not to like scare anyone, but I think discernment is a muscle, and you have to practice using discernment. And it it took me, you know, I always want to see the best in everyone, and I give everyone the benefit of the doubt. And like I always want to see the best in people because that's just like who I am uh as a person. Um, but I always believe like we always have the choice to do better, and like I want to give people that the benefit of the doubt. Um but yeah, sometimes it's important to be discerning and to realize not everyone is for you.
SPEAKER_00:And oh girl, I've been scammed before. Trust me, my my friend and I were just talking about it last weekend. We had, oh my gosh, it must have been like four or five years ago now. We were really interested in going to this like spiritual reader that was on a main street in this town I used to live in. And we went where I had made appointments for us, and we're thinking, like, you know, we're gonna we're gonna walk in and it's gonna be just like an hour-long appointment. And we each sat down and she's like, You each need five sessions, that will be$500 or something like that. We were like, What? And she's like, You have to pay because you made this appointment. And we were just like so flabbergasted, and there was like that's crazy boundary. Oh, yeah, there was a lot of that we kind of got like sucked in. And like looking back now, I'm like, wow, we got totally duped. And we I mean, then when we like did get an appointment, and when you're going to someone, you're like, Oh, okay, well, maybe I do. Like, what you're obviously seeking help in some way, you're not just going to get a reading, like for no reason, you're you're intrigued, you're interested. You're like, what do I need? What does my soul need? And it's like, oh my god, I got totally scammed out of all this money. And yeah, that eventually she told me I had to buy these crystals that I would never see, basically. But she had to buy these crystals to help me. And I was just like, What the fuck is going on? And I never went back. I was like, I just gotta eat this money that I paid. But it it's a total scam. And I don't just want to talk about like the spiritual services because there are so many service providers that are just running like conveyor belts, and uh you're a waitress, maybe you're a waiter, maybe, like I said, I don't know why dental, maybe someone listening to this is like a dental assistant or a dental hygienist because dentist keeps coming up. Um, you know.
SPEAKER_01:Well, that's a very my brother-in-law is a dentist, and um, I I feel like that. I mean, you're in somebody's mouth, it's like such a vulnerable space. Like most people hate going to the dentist. So you have that energy of like every person that walks through the door is fucking dreading being there. So there's like a lot of energy ethics there for sure. And I mean, um, it is one of the suicide rate for dentists is extremely high.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my gosh, I was not aware.
SPEAKER_01:Extremely high.
SPEAKER_00:Wow.
SPEAKER_01:So I there definitely is something there. You're on to something.
SPEAKER_00:That's very interesting. But even if you would do like work in corporate, because I have a lot of my friends and clients who ask me this like, how can I reset my energy if I'm in like back-to-back meetings on the computer? And generally I just say, like, if I'm having a meeting uh via Zoom or Google Meet is what I use. Um, that's besides the point. But if I'm having an online session, me personally, or I'm taking like a class or anything, I am gonna quickly like even just put my computer screen down. Like it's like a reset, like, okay, I'm shutting the computer off. I'm gonna get up, walk away, I'm maybe gonna go wash my hands quickly. I'm gonna go get like a sip of water. And that's my reset. Sometimes I will uh like if I'm in a space practicing that I cannot have a candle, then I'll take the um like the battery operated candles, what do they call those? Like the Luminara, and I'll literally turn it off to like signify the end of whatever I'm doing. And then I'll turn it back on if I'm like have another client coming in after that or if I'm restarting something. So it doesn't have to be like necessarily these physical tools, but what works for you that is gonna be like, okay, I gotta get my energy straight because it's really unfair to all the people around me, and it's unfair to myself. It took me the longest time to realize like I went through so much after I left being behind the chair for like full time. I totally rejected. I was like, I'm not doing hair anymore. It's not for me. I just can't do it. Um, the conveyor belt life is not for me, and now I've been doing it more in my own way. And what I've realized is like, okay, whether it's my energy healing work or hair, I'm not taking more than three or four clients in one day because I know it is going to drain me. I'm also not gonna work outside of the hours that my energy is like the most full. Like, you're not gonna catch me too often at night, maybe once a month or a couple nights a month working because my energy is just not there. I don't have my full potential to give somebody else. So therefore, it's not really fair to them. And I understand that is a privilege, and not everyone has like the privilege that an entrepreneur has to make their own schedule or you know, kind of invent their ideal life. Um, and a lot of people are in like a dictated time schedule, and that's okay too, because you're needed there. But when you are just constantly going from one thing to the next thing, you're going to drain yourself, and that's just yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, that's why massage therapy, on average, people give it up after two years.
SPEAKER_00:It's so much on your body, same with hair. Like, I never realized how much I just beat the shit out of my body. I like still shuffle my feet because I'm paranoid that all the blood's gonna rush to the bottom of my feet and I'll pass out, you know. From sit from being on your feet so much. I need to go sit or I need to change positions. And I mean, I I love it. I found there was things about it that I truly missed, and that was a blessing too. That I could be like, oh my god, I miss this. Like, maybe I do love it.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I think it's what you said before about like finding the way that it works for you best. And um, I think I'm still kind of working on that because like I work outside of the hours that I work best in just to be accommodating or um and I used to do that and it never worked for me.
SPEAKER_00:And I would be so angry all the time, and I'd be like, Why am I so angry? And it was because I was like essentially abandoning myself, and that's not fair to anyone else either. Most of all, not fair to myself, yeah. So it didn't take a lot of self-knowing.
SPEAKER_01:Well, and it also goes back to the energy of things, like, well, you know, how are you showing up for a client if you're in that headspace where you just kind of have to like shove down how you're feeling and just like do the task at hand? And and towards the end of my tenure at uh Massage Envy, that was kind of like where I was getting was it was just like a factory for massage. Um, and my energy was like really being drained, and I like was dreading going into work, so not even like those first few clients were getting the best of my energy because I just like literally didn't want to be there.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and I mean let's face it, some people have better boundaries than others, and so they're not gonna get as drained because they're kind of they got they got it down pat in some ways. Like this is this is not like just like blanket statements for everybody. This is like the highly sensitive people who take on a lot of energy, who are taking on uh like the complexities of their job, and you know, I was always one of those people, and there I just feel like there really are so many layers to it. But even like when I do go to the doctor, I'm like, what did you just do to reset? Like, what type of room am I walking into? And I'm so sensitive that sometimes I'll notice I'm getting paranoid about something, and I'm like, is this even my paranoia, or did somebody before me go into the doctor's office and maybe this was what their diagnosis is? So it's really important on the energetic level that you're taking that precaution to you can't even always rely on like somebody else to reset it, just making sure you're going in, like knowing, okay, is this my energy or is it not? And it's going back to like energy ethics when you like everyone is a wounded healer. I'm sorry, we're all here on this planet to learn lessons. We all have trauma, drama, and bullshit. Exactly.
SPEAKER_01:And show me somebody who doesn't, right?
SPEAKER_00:Like literally up to you to go in and make sure that like if you are going into a massage or you're going into a yoga class, that you're not bringing your shit and your opinions into it. They say, like, when I was in hair school, they were like, leave your baggage at the door, it's not your client's issue that something's going on outside of outside of work. And that was always like a really good thing that like stuck with me. Like, leave your baggage at the door. And it the also the same goes like in in shamanism, we say we need to be the hollow bone, you need to be the clear vessel, you got to deal with your shit. I don't care if I had to deal with like, let's say, like my parent has called me and said like another parent was in the hospital. That's set up for me. I need to cancel my clients if I can't energetically regulate myself immediately before their session. And that is like the ethical code of like, how are you going to be able to show up for the person? And sometimes we have a limiting belief that we don't have a choice. And I've totally been there too. And it's like when I was doing hair full time, I had a funeral to go to, and I think I lost two clients because I had to cancel my day. And then after that, I was like, I can never cancel again. I don't care who like died, what funeral it was. And I that's actually absurd. It's like, okay, those are those people are not meant to be my client anymore. Like, good for them that they found someone else. It would create space for another client to come in. And I just think we do have these, um, you know, like we call them the sacred cows. They're like the layered limiting beliefs that, well, if I do this, then people are gonna react like that. Or if I do this, then this is the consequence, right? And so we're operating off of like this limiting projection.
SPEAKER_01:And honestly, it's fear. So it's like, what energy are you bringing with that mindset of fear? And and going back to the the wounded healer, it's like, yeah, we all are, but what are the controllables? And if there are certain things that you can control, and when you know, you're as a practitioner, like if you are going through something, it's not that you're not gonna take clients, but it's you're gonna learn how to deal with it so that you can show up fully for your clients. Because I think you know, it goes for a lot of professions that we take an oath to do no harm. And I think sometimes that's forgotten. And if you are, if you are showing up with trauma, drama, bullshit, and baggage, then you're actually doing more harm. And and you know, I've I've talked about this before. Um, like I was going to somebody who I was getting re regular energy work with, and I think that her life was a dumpster fire, and we all go through those periods where our life, our life is. But know when to refer someone else out if if it's or when to be like, okay, my energy isn't quite right. Can I reschedule?
SPEAKER_00:Like I And not also abusing that because I've also been on the other end of the spectrum with that of where I've had appointments with service providers and they try to reschedule me or cancel like nearly every time. And I'm like, I understand like things happen, but every time, like now you're kind of taking advantage of so we want to find the balance in in that because it we don't want to swing from one end of the spectrum because that's just gonna dysregulate us even more. So when when we're like recognizing, like, oh, okay, like I'm really emotionally, it's like taking a mental health day. Same exact thing. And yeah, it's there's there's so much to it, and it's really understanding like what is right for you and what is not. Like I can say all these things and make all these suggestions, but if it doesn't relate to you, then it's not gonna apply. Like, then don't do it. Um I was gonna say something else too, but I forgot. So it either means I don't need to talk about that or it'll come back around at a better time.
SPEAKER_01:That's just like the better very oh my god, I can't even talk. That's like very the energy of today.
SPEAKER_00:I feel like it's yes, it's like what is going on? Well, I know.
SPEAKER_01:We're in a Mercury retrograde shadow period. Free shadow. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Oh boy, here we have both.
SPEAKER_01:Actually, I was just But like like you said, like not leaning on that as like the excuse of like, oh, I can't show up today because Mercury is going retrograde.
SPEAKER_00:I think like a lot of times we use that like if you know you're an emotional basket case at the full moon, maybe you're like, I'm not gonna schedule something on the film. Well, that's like I think that um or on the other hand, scheduling something that's gonna be really supportive to you.
SPEAKER_01:Like for me, I think it's I mean, I I can't always do this because I teach weekly yoke classes, so like you have to show up weekly, but like I have gotten better about not scheduling things during my bleeding phase and to be more intentional about scheduling things when my energy is more there, like during my fertile days, like during ovulation period, um, because otherwise, like when I'm in luteal or when I'm bleeding, like I just don't fucking want to.
SPEAKER_00:Right. And I think that's like most women don't, but like I said, like not everyone has the privilege to be able to do that. Right. And so where can you find the little things that you can do to support yourself? Like if you're working a long day and you're on your period and you're you're a woman, or if you're working a long day and you're a man and you're just like, oh, I've been like kind of feeling burnt out or whatever. I mean, it's not even it doesn't even have to be like male or like masculine or feminine. It's just like you have to find what's going to be supportive for you. So if you feel like you're getting drained, but your option is not to cut back on your hours or take a day off, then what can you do to support yourself? Can it be a heated yoga class in the evening to regulate your nervous system? Can it be that you go home and you make yourself a meal or that you go out to a restaurant by yourself because you would like somebody else to wait on you after you have felt like you've been out putting so much energy all day? Can it be that you give yourself permission to lay on the couch and watch a show instead of going home and having to do the laundry? Like, can it like can these little things wait? We get so like routined and then it becomes fully ingrained, and then we feel like we're stuck in it. And that I think is the bigger challenge on a larger scale, not just in like the like that um spiritual community. I think this can benefit literally everybody.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I agree, I agree, and you know, whether or not you like believe it or not, like we're all energetic beings, and it's not just our physical body, but we have our energetic field that goes out, like according to ancient yogic principle. It goes out of scientific proof, yeah, seven feet in each direction. So just being intentional about like what you're picking up and and like noticing, it's like you said, sometimes these moods that we go through, they're not even ours. Like we might be picking up on something else. And um, that's why I think it's really important as energy workers or as somebody who's receiving energy work to be discerning and to be intentional about who you're letting work on you.
SPEAKER_00:Um, yeah, I've had I've had a lot of clients recently. I just want to share this. Like a lot of clients recently, they feel very like stuck where they don't know kind of what they want or where to go next. And if you're feeling like you don't understand what the discernment is of what is yours and what is not, the first thing I always suggest is like, what are your values? What are the things that you value or uh need to show up for in life? Like, is that work? How do you want to feel in work? Is that with your family? How do you want to feel with your family? So getting back to those values will help you understand, like, oh, okay, this is who I am, and I can most certainly easily get back to that. But yeah, it is really important to um know who you're going to because I've also been the person to like seek out energy work and psychics and readers. Because when I'm in that fear of the unknown, I'm like, I need to know what's gonna happen. And I've been freaking like I always tell my clients, I'm not telling you, even if I have a feeling if you're gonna get back together with someone or not, because it doesn't matter, everyone has free will, and I'm not here to like predict your future.
SPEAKER_01:I'm here to sway people one way or the other. Like, I think that's what's really important too, as um a practitioner is not swaying people one way or the other. And we can take this back to simple terms. Think about it uh when you're when you're hairdressing or like when I'm massaging, people tell you their deepest, darkest secrets on those tables. Like things that they should go to a therapist or a psychiatrist with, they are telling their hairdresser or their massage therapist. Yeah. And like, not that we're not qualified to handle things like that, but I just think it's important not to give opinions.
SPEAKER_00:Is this a clinical like is it clinical or is it an opinion?
SPEAKER_01:Right. And like you said, to refer people, like, oh, you know, this is beyond my scope of practice. So let me see if I can help refer you to somebody who can be of better service. Exactly.
SPEAKER_00:Or like for me, I work with teams. I have Savannah the Medium, who is in this same building that we are. I will consult with her with the permission of my client. I really need to consult with my team. Like, do you mind? I need more information on be to be able to help you. I consult with my other friend who is a shaman. She's also a chemical engineer. She practices biomagnetism for her work. And I'm like, I need to consult someone who understands. I have my mentor, is an MD who is also a shaman. It's like, I need to consult these people. I mean, obviously, I'm not giving a medical diagnosis in any way, shape, or form, but when you have a team of people that you can trust, you're more powerful. Do you know what I mean? You don't want to go to a doctor and you're like, oh, well, you're diagnosed with this, and then you're not gonna want like multiple options of what you can do to help yourself. It's the same with energy. It's like, oh, you're kind of diagnosed with an energy blockage, right? If we're gonna look at it from that point of view, and I can do my best with my knowledge and understanding that I have right now in unblocking that and helping you to understand what it is. But if I can't reach the level that I know is needed, then I am using my discernment. Okay, who do I need to call in to help with this? Does this person need an appointment with them? Is there just a resource I can point them to? Maybe it's a podcast episode of yours where I'm like, this, I think this will really help you fully understand and integrate this energy a little bit more. So just knowing or trusting that like we all have our limits and it's important to and we're all human.
SPEAKER_01:Like, yeah, like let's not put professionals or like anyone across the board, exactly like energy work or like like you said, your dentist. Yeah, it's not putting these people up on pedestals as like infallible because we're all humans, there's room for error, exactly, and also like people who are are reading energy and working with spirit, like we're working through our limited point of view. So sometimes we're gonna get it wrong, right? We're gonna get it wrong, and I think that's why you know nearly enlightened was born was because I wanted to teach people solid tools to look within so that they weren't seeking outside of themselves because I was the seeker that was seeking outside of myself, same girl, and it did more harm than good, yeah, and that is like the real the real raw, honest truth is it did more harm than good, and it took a really long time to undo all of those things and to come back and to look within.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, I think it can like one person what they tell you like in a reading, and I'm gonna use let's just like let's use maybe tarot for a reason. This could be any reader, like I don't even want to like specify the type, but I've been told like you know, when I was like 15, okay, you're gonna be married by this age, you're gonna have this many kids, it's gonna be the gender, and it's like now once I hit 30 and I did not achieve or like reach those milestones that I placed all of my self-worth into at that age, and that was like I fucking latched on to that and ran with it. I was like, well, this person I date is definitely gonna be my husband because this psychic, when I was 15, told me that uh, you know, I was gonna get be married by this age. So if I'm supposed to be married by 26 and this person I'm dating at 24, 25, this gotta be the person, right? And they were total fucking douche. And I was like, what am I doing? And it really took a lot of work. And maybe I was just naive. And like I said, some people are gonna have better discernment than others. It really just depends on like what your like patterning is. Mine was always to just self-sacrifice and just take what I could get, I guess. And yeah, I mean, I learned very quickly.
SPEAKER_01:I was like, oh boy, yeah, I mean, that's why I like literally won't do tarot where I won't see psychics anymore. And I think too, it's because I've leaned more on like my Catholic Christian roots, so it just like doesn't resonate with me anymore. And I think like when you are going straight to God, you are not that you're seeking less answers, but you know, in the Bible it says like over 300 times like, do not fear, do not be afraid, give your worry to God. Yeah, in in so in so many words, like so. I think that I always try and remind myself of that now. But I was somebody who was like always seeking, always wanted to go to a psychic, or you know, get the answers. And I think I've said it on this podcast before, and I think I might have even said it on our last episode. It's damaging because they're imprinting something on you that may not be correct. Because, like I said, these we're all human, like no one that's doing this work is. Better than anyone else. And I think that um yeah, we just need to remember that like there's a human on the other side of that table. Like they're not infallible. They're not like absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:And I mean, I've also been to readers that are phenomenal tarot readers, phenomenal energy workers, and help me to understand like what I cannot put into words for myself. And that's part of my job, is I help others put into words and understanding a little bit about what they're experiencing in the unseen realm. And that's my interpretation, as just as much as it's the interpretation of the reader, and it's like it's not their responsibility how you interpret it. I think that's important to say. However, like I've been to some really ethical readers who are like, this is the energy right now. Tomorrow it could be different. So you have the power. You don't like this reading, you have the power to change that. Like, this is just maybe what you're feeling right now or the potential.
SPEAKER_01:Or if you keep if you keep continuing on this path the way that you are right now, this is going to be the outcome. If you don't like it, then like you said, make a change.
SPEAKER_00:And it's like it's it's all potential.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:This is a possible outcome. Like, what do you what do you want your possibility to be? Like, so I think that is important to say that there are really ethical practitioners.
SPEAKER_01:But that's why it's important to be discerning and to do the inner work and to gather the tools that work for you, whether it be yoga, breath work, meditation, uh, sound baths, like I don't know, whatever it is, like find the tools that help you go within so that you can be more clear when you are discerning on other people's energy.
SPEAKER_00:And I mean, you can feel it. Like we all have that kind of inner knowing of like instinct. That's why I mean, with my work, I always say I mean I have gift cards available, but I always say, like, please do not buy a gift card unless this person has expressed that they want to see me, and this is something you want to gift them. The person has to be in agreement with wanting to come, otherwise it's pointless. Right. If they feel forced or yeah, or just go because I liked it, helped change me. It's like it's not for everyone.
SPEAKER_01:No, and that's why I think it's important to find the tools that work for you. And if it's, I don't know, if it's something like totally, I don't know, if it's rock climbing, like I don't know what it is.
SPEAKER_00:Literally, it could be anything. If you want to a nail tech, I I've had friends who are like, go to my nail tech, they're amazing. And then I go, I'm like, I didn't like that at all. It wasn't for me. I could have chosen to go back and be like, okay, I'm like force myself into this that I'm like the.
SPEAKER_01:Because somebody else told me that this person was good.
SPEAKER_00:Right, exactly.
SPEAKER_01:And so it's it's it's like they might be good for them, but they're not good for you.
SPEAKER_00:Right, exactly. I mean, I've had I just this past weekend, it was um someone a friend had asked me this week, actually. Um, I have a friend who blah blah blah. Would you be able to help them? I'm like, I don't really, I don't know. I don't know enough like about kind of the topic that you're talking about. I have a couple of the resources. You're gonna really have to ask this person, like, does she have the feeling that she needs to come for, like, come have a session with me? Because then, yes, of course, I don't need to know that I I'm gonna be able to help her. I just know if they were sent my way, then spirit is like, okay, you're you're gonna be able to help this person and shift somehow. And I've also had clients who come to me and it's been a lesson for me. And I have to say, okay, what about this was also not like information for me. And usually that I never see that client again if it was like, you know, to push me in a in a certain direction. But um, yeah, it's very interesting. And I know how hard it is because when I was in my 20s, I mean, I started training with a or I started seeing a shaman when I was 19, and I was like, so what's my future gonna hold? And she was like, Oh honey, no, this isn't how this works. She's like, Your life is probably gonna turn upside down because we're about to like strip you of all this bullshit patterning that has been greened in you and your like the generational trauma, like let's go. And man, my 20s were like it was a bumpy ride, and it I still feel like in my 30s it has been, but yeah, life is a bumpy ride. It's the tools that you gather to help you deal with the bumps, exactly. But I I they would always say, like, oh, you're you need to be more grounded or you need to be like more discerning. I was like, what the fuck does that mean?
SPEAKER_01:You know, like so as somebody who is a Gemini and has like a lot of air and fire in my chart, that is something that people have told me my whole life.
SPEAKER_00:It's kind of annoying because you're like, Well, I don't understand the full if you if you're someone who needs to get more grounded or you're someone who needs more boundaries, you're like, How? How? And what? How? Or when they people say, I just wrote a blog post about this a couple weeks ago. When people are like, you just need to let it go. I was like so annoyed with my therapist. She said something about, oh, just you know, whatever, let it go. And I was like, but how? Like, what do you mean let it go? It's not like it just flies away in the wind and like it's kind of going back to what you were saying about like give it to God. It's like, okay, but how? How? Like, what do you do? Like, you have to really sit with it and like give it permission to die off.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, and also to feel it and not push it down or shove it away, or it's like I am really good at this. Like, I like to I like to smoke marijuana until it's numb and like then it's like that okay, it's not there anymore. But like that's a form of addiction. So, like, that's not a great way to deal with it either. But really, sit with the feelings and be uncomfortable. It's like, okay, no one wants to feel these uncomfortable feelings, but if you don't feel them, then they're never gonna go away. They're you're just shoving them down and like compartmentalizing them somewhere else, and it's gonna come up even bigger and badter than it was if you just like fucking deal with it in the moment.
SPEAKER_00:Right. And I think when we're like coasting for a while and and we're just like, oh, I'm not gonna deal with that. I'm gonna just kind of like disassociate from it, compartmentalize, like like you were saying, like at one point you have to blow. And I think for me, it happened in my 30s, and I was just like this reckoning started to happen, like when I left work, and like that's like the uh like the Saturn return. Yeah, and I had to start like really deciding what needed to change, and it was like extremely humbling, and I was like, this is kind of what people have been telling me, but I did not fully understand it. It is humbling, and but I had to be present with myself, and basically, all as it is is like radical acceptance of yourself. It's like, hey, guess what? I want to do these two things in my life, I want to do hair and I want to do energy work, and they don't have to go together, they can be two different things, they can be two different things, but also I think they're the same.
SPEAKER_01:I also think you do a beautiful job of integrating them. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. If you've ever had an energy cleansing haircut, like you, if you know, you know.
SPEAKER_00:I know, and exactly, but it was like uh for me, I was like kind of re rejecting it in a way, and it was like, well, I that's not what I do. Like, my full-time job is this, and I was like, you know what? Now I can do whatever the fuck I want. I can do 40 different things. Now I'm like, when people ask me what I do, I'm like, well, I'm a caretaker for my nieces, uh, I have an energy healing practice, I have uh like a cosmetology practice, and like any other questions? So I think that a lot of this just like comes down to, like I said, being present with yourself, understanding like, is this something I truly need? Like, I still, when I'm feeling like shit, I'm like, I need an energy clearing because I don't know, like I have way better discernment than I ever have. I have still recently had energy healing sessions where I'm like, oh, that's what came out, okay. Or like, yeah, this was all other people's energy, not even your own. And sometimes it just gets stuck. It's like, okay, it's like needing to pluck a hair out. So if you're gonna go get, we were talking about this earlier, like getting your eyebrows done, like whether you're getting them threaded or plucked or waxed, whatever. Like sometimes you need that extra help. Could you pluck them at home? Yes. But is the aesthetician gonna go in and do like a cleaner job? Yes. So sometimes we just need that in whatever way sometimes it's like you need to um work with a physical trainer or go to a yoga class opposed to doing it at home. You just get a deeper level of um realignment, essentially.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I agree. I'm I mean, I think I think it's important to seek out professionals and to be discerning about their credentials, um, because like we've said, like this is a very unregulated field. So a lot of even in yoga, like you technically don't need a 200-hour teacher training to teach yoga. Is it encouraged? Absolutely. Is it required? No. I've worked at plenty of gyms where it's like, oh, that person, they just they've been practicing for a really long time. So they're they're a decent teacher, they know what they're doing. And it's like, no, they don't. No, they don't. I'm really sorry.
SPEAKER_00:I've been in yoga classes with like other yoga instructors who are friends, and they they're like, I will not take a hands-on assist from that person. They're too new. And I'm like, oh, I didn't really consider that, right? But when you're in the field, you understand, you're like, that's shady, don't do that, you're not really qualified. And like I said, some people, and we need these people in the world too, are like, they take it and run with it. They're like, I learned this, I'm gonna go execute it immediately. For us, we're the different breed where we're like, I need to understand this fully. And part of that is probably honestly a trauma response. That we're like, well, we gotta be perfect before we go and do it. For me personally, I just want to have an understanding of what I'm doing. It elevates my confidence, it elevates my ability to communicate with others. If I'm not really sure what I'm doing, like whether it's a specific like hair color or a technique, I'm like, no, I need to fully understand this before I'm gonna do it. It's just my work has to have um like be authentic. And to me, that like if I'm feeling con confident in it, I'm gonna be more authentic. Otherwise, I'm gonna be like, oh, fake it till you make it. And in many industries, they say that they literally say, fake it till you make it. And sometimes that's the case.
SPEAKER_01:My yoga teacher, he I forget. This was like one of the first times I met him, but I had like I had said that in I don't know what we were talking about. I can't remember. Honestly, it was like six years ago at this point, but he stopped everything he was doing. He was like, never say that in front of me again. I was like, what? And he was like, No, you face it until you make it. And I was like, Oh my god, the chills. I was like, so that has I love my perspective on that. And you know, like I was a new yoga teacher too, and when I I started teacher training August 2015, and I started teaching after the first weekend, not for money, right? I was teaching for free. I was teaching my friends, and the whole thing was like, hey, help me practice. I am new at this, I need help practicing, speaking in front of people, sequencing a class. And I really do think that that's what made me a stronger teacher. And I had one friend in particular, and she has since passed away, but she was very um supportive. And she was um, she worked in like the restaurant industry, so they always had Monday off. So Monday was like our day to get together, and that was when I practiced. And they came and they were so consistent, and they helped me practice through the whole six months that I was in teacher training, so that when I did graduate, I was fully confident that I could teach a decent class. I still was a beginner, and let me tell you, like my teacher that taught that first teacher training would say, and I thought she was such a bitch for this, but uh, she would say all the time, until you've been teaching for 10 years, you are a beginner. And I would be like, She doesn't know what she's talking about. But now that I've hit this 10-year mark, I can totally see that. I am just now starting to feel like I have my niche and like I can step out as an expert in this field, but I don't think that I would have thought that about myself even two years ago.
SPEAKER_00:Well, I can totally relate because when I was in hair school, they literally basically put you out into the salon to like work on clients a month in. And you have to, I would like run and hide in the bathroom because I was so scared. I was like, uh what? Even though there was teachers watching you and people were still paying um very small amounts. But when I worked, started working at my first salon after I assisted for a certain period of time, I had to go around to the businesses on the street, same street that the salon was on, and I had to hand out free haircut gift certificates and give it to like certain people. And I had to do she like the owner was like, You have to go hand out 10 of these today. And so I, and out of those 10 people, I think three came, and then I had to do it again a couple weeks later until but because I had to practice, and it was like, here, you need to have models, you need to practice on them. And then actually, when you're in your shamanic training, um we go through a period of like case study, and so you have to work on a certain amount, let's say 10 clients, without you cannot charge them, and that was the way it was. And I did like I hearing that yoga was like the same way for you, I think it's it's so accurate. And I it it's like same with other people who are just starting a business, and maybe they're like they have a product and they go and hand hand out like free merch. Same thing, it's the same thing in the in this industry. It's like you have to gain your practice. Like everybody who goes to hairdressing school is like, I learned nothing because it's almost less than a year long of schooling. I know, yeah. Massage, I mean, depending on the program, it's like 13 months, maybe. Yeah, and then you're you're like go out into the world and you're like, I know nothing. So for me, it was always important to go to a teaching salon, and I did, I hit the jackpot with my first salon, and I mean, I was an assistant, and then I worked my way up, and then even then, I had a year of like free education just handed to me, and I was allowed to stand next to every single stylist at any given time and listen to their consultations, and I was able to not saying I'm perfect, like I've definitely had miscommunications with clients where you know they've had to come back and I've had to like fix something, adjust their hair or something, and that's fine too. It's just like you're not gonna be for everybody all the time.
SPEAKER_01:No, and like uh it goes back to your human, like you're I mean, even my hairdresser has been my hairdresser for like literally since I was 17. Um, and she's had a couple of missteps, and she's been a hairdresser for like 40 years, and and like sometimes things go wrong, and yeah, so you just have to realize that people are human, and you know, even in a yoga class, like sometimes I'll get home and I'll be like, oh my god, I forgot to do that on the left side, and it's like I'm I'm like getting ready to go to bed, and now I'm like haunted by like the one pose that I forgot on the left side.
SPEAKER_00:I forgot I would get that person a glass of water, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So it's like just knowing that we're all human and to be discerning when you're when you're seeking, and to also do the inner work so that you have, I think we have healthy discernment when we have a when we can trust our intuition. And sometimes that's really hard because the intuition speaks, and you're like, okay, that's just like this crazy thought that just popped up in my mind. And you try and or feeling, and you just try and like kind of shove it aside, and that is where we break our own trust when we're not following our own intuition. And I think that that is also a muscle that that needs flexing. And sometimes you're seeking because you need to work on that intuition muscle. But I think it's important to seek the tools that develop the inner work first before you're like, I don't know, out like seeking answers from other people who are only human.
SPEAKER_00:I think it starts with observation. And I was talking to a friend this week again, like, wow, a lot of stuff came up for this podcast this week. And they were saying that they went and got a massage. They have like a membership at one of those types of places. I don't think it was Envy, it was something else. And she was saying, she's like, Yeah, they started the massage at maybe like 9.08, because you know, you need time to get changed, but then they ended at 9.45, and it was supposed to be a 60-minute massage. And I'm like thinking to myself, yeah, well, they probably have to reset for the next client who's probably at 10, and they're accounting for you taking 15 minutes to get changed, but it's like that shouldn't be on the customer. This is like where we go. So she was like, you know, I thought about it and she's like, uh, next time I go, if it happens again, then I'll say something. I don't think that's always like, let's rush into this. I think uh observing, taking note, and understanding, like, okay, this didn't feel right last time, maybe it will this time. But then if it continuously doesn't feel right, then it's like, okay, we have a problem here because this is not working for me.
SPEAKER_01:And now all this doing is triggering and evoking this like anger and judgment and taking this taking this enjoyable thing that's meant to like fill your cup up and like not being that.
SPEAKER_00:It's like, okay, I should have just said, like, hey, wasn't this a 60-minute massage? And if you know, it's like if it was, I'm not saying they weren't being ethical because I have no idea what happened, but let's say you are a service provider and you're just booking back to back, like, what's your buffer time? If you need, like for me, I have to, I used to do the 15 minutes. Uh, I used to do none. And then I was like, I need 15 minutes, but like, or book an hour for a haircut. Cause if it's taking me 45 minutes, I need 15 minutes to read that. And even with my energy work now, I take 30 to 45 minutes buffer time because I'm like, not only do I need to turn change my uh room over for the next person, I gotta make sure this room is clear. I like the window needs to be open, it needs to be like complete separation from. And some people, like I said, can shake it off faster. And for me, I I uh absorb so deeply that I need to give myself time to let that absorption really clear itself out. Some people can just dust it off, you know, and that's fine and that's great, but know who you're working with, know if that person is really efficient in that. Know if what are you feeling when you go to a place? Do you feel safe or you don't? If you're uncomfortable, like you have the ability to be like, hey, I never have to go here again.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Oh, and there's been there's been things like that for me for sure. I mean, I think everyone can relate to that. Um, but I think some solid, like some solid tools. I feel like we've just been complaining for like an hour.
SPEAKER_00:I know. Well, I'm trying to say, like, there are practitioners out there who are ethical and who are protecting their energy and want the best for your energy. And that's what it comes down to. Like, are people taking care of themselves? That is energetic hygiene. That is ethics.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And like I say it on this podcast all the time. Like, most of the people, I would say all of the people who I've had on this podcast, I am very discerning about who comes on this podcast. And it's really people who I know without a shadow of a doubt are not just talking the talk, but they are walking the walk and they are doing the deep inner work. It's not fucking easy. And that's why if you look back on these episodes, like I have a lot of re like you, like I have a lot of repeat people because it's people that I trust that I know without a shadow of a doubt that are really doing the work for themselves. And I would trust to send people to work with them. Right. Um, and like, you know, I I've gotten this advice a lot to have people, you know, somebody, somebody keeps giving me this one particular person in my life keeps giving me the same advice is to have people on the podcast that challenge me more and that have more uh differing opinions than me, um, because they think that it would be like good for the good for the brand. Um but I vehemently isn't like a debate. Right. And this also like is my fucking podcast. Like, um, so I'm gonna conduct it the way that I want. And if you don't like it, like go listen to somebody else's podcast. Right. Um, but I will only have people on this podcast that I trust and that I would personally work with. So if it's boring because their opinions are closely related to mine, then like sorry about it.
SPEAKER_00:But like I think we were just trying to, you're you relate to a lot of things that your uh guests are saying, and so for you, you're like, if I'm relating, other people are gonna relate, and you want people to feel like a community and that they're seen and heard, and there's it's relatable. We're not here to have a debate and cause that separation, like in this podcast in particular. Not saying it, I mean that's it's very healthy to have debate.
SPEAKER_01:Right. And there are some people who I don't like, like we don't completely have like the same point of views, and and even I'll get really real before we wrap up. Um, going back to discernment and being careful about who you work with. Um, I'm just gonna name her because it's out there. Um, but Busy Gold, who is the creator of booty yoga and the creator of Break Method, who, if you've listened to the podcast before, I tell people Break Method is a great tool if you want to not go to therapy for your whole life, if you want to break those patterns um and to really understand like what's happening in your brain and how to rewire, it's a great tool. There are some crazy things coming out about her now. She has zero qualifications, zero certifications, um, zero credentials that are verifiable. And it is it is a very scary thing. And now I'm kind of coming to the place where do I retract the statements that I've made around this because I don't know if she's a hundred percent a safe person. This is something I'm going through.
SPEAKER_00:But have you personally tried it? The break method?
SPEAKER_01:Yes, I have personally gone through.
SPEAKER_00:Then you've been test them.
SPEAKER_01:I will say I didn't personal testament.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:But my friend Dee, who has been on the podcast before, has finished, has um even worked with the company, and we're gonna do a podcast on this in the next couple of weeks. So stay tuned. It's still something that I am unpacking, and you know, it's important to know that the person exposing her is also a person, a human being, and might be operating out of their her patterns and wounds and their trauma, trauma, and bullshit. Um, so being discerning, but uh the facts are that there are no verifiable certifications that make her qualified for anything that she has done. There is some speculation that she stole booty yoga from somebody else and made it what it is. Um I don't know. I don't know. I don't want to, I don't want this to be like I'm talking shit, um, because obviously, like I'm in the community. There's been a lot of booty practitioners that have been on the podcast.
SPEAKER_00:I think at the end of the day, it's being holding people accountable to authenticity.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, and being um transparent and you know, everything that we we say now with the the age of the internet, everything can pretty much everything can be verified. So I don't know, I'm I'm in this space now where I'm in this moment of discernment where do I continue to send people down this road?
SPEAKER_00:And um Yeah, but you're allowed to I'm allowed to be human and make mistakes. And your interpretations are bound to shift and change and if you it's like not like you have to backtrack and say I rescind this statement. You can absolutely now just be like, I never have to recommend that again.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, and yeah, I'm being fully transparent and like uh I don't know if I have complete trust in this person anymore. She is a human and humans make mistakes, and maybe she'll come out to rectify this, and it will be a blessing and it will be um good for the whole, or you know, maybe she's completely fraudulent and the whole thing falls apart. I don't know. Stay tuned. Um, but yeah, so just like being discerning about who you're working with. I think it's it's important. It's something that's been on my heart, and I'm glad that we got to talk about it. Um, because I think even more so now with the age of like the energy work influencers all over social media, like it it's just it's really important to just be careful of the content that you are consuming because that is energy too, and to just um to do the deep inner work so that you can flex the discernment muscle when you need to.
SPEAKER_00:Absolutely. The more inner work you do, the closer that you get to yourself, and not saying you won't need people outside of yourself, but it becomes less of a um like a saving.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I think it's it's what I'm going through right now. It's like I'm coming back to these Catholic Christian roots and I'm going straight to God. I'm not working with anyone else, and that could be like elusive and ethereal to some people, and like that's fine. You know, whatever.
SPEAKER_00:Um, but it's someone that they trust, yeah, and that they believe in.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Because you need to have both of those elements there.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, for sure. So yeah, like I I think the more that I go to God and I develop this deep inner work that I've been doing for the last like 15 plus years, I need less outside influence. And when those outside influences start to be like, okay, well, maybe this person isn't the best person to I don't want to say the best person to follow, but like the best person to take advice from. Um like realizing that they're human and kind of being forgiving too. I think that there's an element that I'm going through about this right now with booty and break is to like be forgiving. And like like you said at the beginning of the podcast, like pretty much everyone is just doing the best they can with what they are working with at this time and to remember that. Um like I think, yeah, I don't know. This is something that I'm going through. It's developed.
SPEAKER_00:Some people take things and run with it, and good for them. And I think for some others, if you feel like you're behind or like, oh, that person's doing what I said I want to do, it's okay. Like they might be running a marathon or a sprint, and where you're, you know, you're taking your time, you're in the cross country, slow, slow and steady wins the race. Yeah. And it neither one is right or wrong. It I think it's observing at again. How do you feel? What is this person invoking in front of and within you? Are you being authentic to yourself? I'm a slow poke with everything. I've like so many things I've created that I'm like, oh, it doesn't feel ready yet. Could I throw it out there? Yes, I would absolutely freak out. Because if it didn't feel right and didn't feel like me, and didn't have like it's a roof, my work is a reflection of me, and it needs to match who I kind of am at this point in time. And I'm not gonna put it out if I don't feel like it's ready. That's just me. Some people are like, you know what, throw it up, put it out there, see what happens, I'll fix it as we go.
SPEAKER_01:And I envy them too. I yeah, and I'm kind of like uh now I'm kind of in the middle, but I was like a jump into the deep end kind of girl, and that is good sometimes, but sometimes it's better to pause and um to for lack of a better word right right now, um, to be discerning. And uh, I think that's where I am right now. As like I'm I'm being very discerning about who I'm working with, who I am.
SPEAKER_00:Well, and supporting people that you draw.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, yeah. And just following that that that deep inner inner knowing. Um, because it's funny, right from the beginning with the booty community, not that something didn't feel right, but I knew so the first time I ever walked into a training, there was drama happening. Like one of the lead trainers was suing busy, and busy was counter-suing, and it was like this big thing, and you know, there was a lot of drama there. And so that was like my first, I was like coming into the energy for the first time. So I kind of knew right from the beginning, but it it was going back to like the just wanting to see the best in everyone, and also like the movement was like it was the movement style that really did it for me. Like, I liked the shaking and the the dance elements and the more feminine vibe that it brought to yoga, um, which now it's like not even yoga because they went through like other litigations and they had to take that. So now it's like booty movement versus booty yoga, and like there's been a lot of things. So um developing story, but yeah, it's just something I'm currently being discerning about right now, and um just forgiving and knowing that like people who are in this community who are the leaders of this community are just human too, and they're hopefully doing the best that they can. Um, and I think that through all of these things, like even though there's like some tumultuous energy on the outskirts of it right now, like the good, the light will prevail.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and just sticking to what you feel is right for you.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, and like you said, going back to your values, like what are your values? Like, I think that I have some pretty strong um like family and community values. So, like just reminding myself of that, and like everything's gonna be okay.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and differing values is fine.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, yeah. Absolutely. Well, thank you for coming and chatting about this today.
SPEAKER_00:Anytime. Thanks for having me.
SPEAKER_01:Um, of course, of course, my podcast is your podcast. And thank you all so much for listening. Thank you for tuning into today's episode of the Nearly Enlightened Podcast. If this conversation resonated with you, I would love it if you shared it, if you left a review, or if you even wanted to reach out and let me know your thoughts. And if you're looking for more ways to deepen your connection to body, mind, and spirit, check out my Meditate to Elevate Guided Meditation portal or visit nearlyenlightened.com for more resources. Until next time, stay curious, stay connected, and remember the answers already lie within.