Nearly Enlightened

The Yogi Walrus Gets Roasted

• Giana Rosa Giarrusso • Season 4 • Episode 20

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When someone's attempt at a mean insult is exactly what you need to laugh, reframe, and reclaim your power. In this episode, I’m joined by Dee Doyno as we turn the infamous “yogi walrus” comment into a playful springboard for real conversation about body talk, wellness culture, and loosening perfectionism with a little humor. We even dive into AI roasts of our own Instagram selves—espresso auras, chaos energy, and brass-knuckle kindness included—because when you can giggle at your shadows, it makes healing a little more palatable. 
From laughter, we shift into depth: exploring boundaries, non-attachment, self-worth, and the difference between forgiveness and access. We talk about transitioning from a “year nine” to a “year one,” shedding old skins, and starting fresh without burnout. We also get into yoga beyond the mat—living the eight limbs, navigating life after a 200-hour teacher training, and why mentorship and lifelong learning are game-changers for real bodies in real spaces.
Plus, we’re relaunching our 28-day yoga challenge as an accessible, daily container to rebuild rhythm, integrate breath and study, and lean on community accountability. Consider it a sneak peek of what’s coming next: deeper mentorship and a teacher training that honors lineage while supporting modern life.
If you’re craving a reset that blends heart, humor, and practice, this episode is for you. Subscribe, share with a friend who could use a loving nudge, and leave a review to help more curious humans find the show. Ready to learn from love and move forward with us?


Sign up for the challenge here!

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SPEAKER_02:

Welcome to the Nearly Enlightened Podcast, a high-vibe toolbox designed to help you connect to your body, mind, and spirit. I am your host, Gianna Gerusso, and I'm here to share tools, conversations, and insights to help you on your journey of self-discovery. This podcast is all about exploring what it means to live a conscious, connected, and nearly enlightened life. Because the truth is the answers aren't outside of us. They're already within. Let's dive in.

SPEAKER_01:

Hello, Dee. Hey yo. Hello. Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_02:

It's crazy. I think the last time you were on the podcast was like June.

SPEAKER_01:

Was it? It was when it was like, yeah, around then, because we did the challenge in May.

SPEAKER_02:

That's crazy. What? Where we are.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, what isn't going on? I feel like it's a change of seasons. It's the 'tis the season, right? Um, but where you are, you guys are getting cold, and right where I am, we're getting warm. So I missed the summer already.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm jealous.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, well, you could possibly be coming down here.

SPEAKER_02:

So apparently that's definitely happening.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. Holding that up.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm really excited about today's episode. The last time we spoke, we didn't record, but we were just like hanging out via Zoom. And you needed a laugh. And so you had Chat GPT roast your Instagram. And I thought, what a great podcast episode that would be.

SPEAKER_01:

So here we are. Here we are. Yeah. I feel like it's just, you know, you have one of those days. There's like, I just need some laughter and humor. And so what better way than just kind of making fun of yourself or finding light in some situation that is already there? So yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, I have uh this has been like what's coming up for me because as you know, somebody called me the yogi walrus. I don't know that. Oh my gosh, I didn't tell you.

SPEAKER_03:

What does that even mean?

SPEAKER_02:

That I'm a fat yogi. These bitches out here still commenting on people's bodies, like what low hanging? Is that a joke? No, that was 100% meant to be a hurtful dig.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm actually concerned about whoever said that because um that that is like the very opposite of what is true. And why are we, yeah, why are we looking at bodies?

SPEAKER_02:

I think that we're deeply unwell. Yeah. Yeah. And that's why nearly enlightened was born. Yes. We're helping the deeply unwell.

SPEAKER_01:

I am sometimes the deeply unwell. Hey, girl. We're all kind of just rolling through these waves because it's been intense. It's been intense lately, all over all across the board in all different ways. Yes. But the truth is that's kind of like that's funny. That is funny to me. Now I'm gonna call you the Yogi Walrus. Like, that's just funny. I hope you laughed. Right.

SPEAKER_02:

If you were I did you laughed at that. First of all, since though, like they were commenting on my posts from it's a while ago now. So, like, from I was still in Arizona, they were from my um aerial yoga days, and and referred to me as the yogi walrus. So if I didn't recently lose 30 pounds from stress, uh they would have taken it very personally because I did hate my body then, and you know what's funny? Like, I wasn't fat, and this is definitely like a healing, like a point of healing. Um, like I didn't love my body then, and but I wasn't fat, and so looking now, it's like, oh, that was a beautiful body too, and I was perfectly healthy, I wasn't overweight, I wasn't like whatever. I'm in a healthy weight range. I am more comfortable in my body now, and I'm definitely like the skinniest I've probably ever been since high school. But again, still healthy, still muscular, still strong, probably the strongest I've been in a really long time, but I did lose weight in a very unhealthy way just because there's been like a lot of stress. Yeah. Um, from some personal things that I am not giving energy to. But the person who called me a Yogi Walrus was involved in uh in that drama. And so I'm giving her love because I know she listens, I know she's watching my every move. So, girl, this episode is for you.

SPEAKER_01:

I feel like you can kind of spin that into some kind of like that's satire. Like, I just that's too funny. Like, maybe you need to change your handle. I don't know, think about it. Like that's too much. That's too much. I know. And especially I think in the world in the industry that we're both in, it's I don't know if it'll ever really go away. Um, talking about bodies and what they look like.

SPEAKER_02:

And I think it's really I think it I don't know if I'm the expert to talk on this because I've gone through my own up and ups and downs with with that kind of um I mean, show me a woman who hasn't, like I think that's very prevalent now, especially like I think I've talked about it on this podcast a little bit, but um, like people who haven't seen me in a while think I'm they're like, are you on the Ozempic? Like, no, no, I'm not on the Ozempic, not on the GL1Ps, um, or whatever they're fucking called. But I think it's like a funny conversation that is happening right now because we swung from this body positivity, like kind of glorifying unhealthy bodies, to like swinging back to where we were in the 90s of this like heroin chic look. And it's just very interesting to look at, especially coming from like a you know, yoga isn't fitness, but in the West, like yoga is mostly asana, mostly the physical practice, so it kind of is. And um, like I think it's something that all women deal with, and yeah, especially in our society for sure. Yes, and coming up on the holidays, like I've been on this soapbox before where like I hate when fitness instructors are like, do those extra chaturangas so you can earn your pie this weekend. Like that fucking aggravates me more than anything in the world. It's so disgusting. Like, it there's just so many things that need to change in the fitness culture, and that's definitely one of them. Like, we're not punishing our bodies to eat, and just like that's just like a whole other talk, but I think it it goes together, and um, it is something I laughed off, Yogi Walrus lol. Like, girl, find some self-love. Like, that's a projection.

SPEAKER_01:

Um I just I can't. That's too, I mean, so mean. I'm and I'm sorry, I'm laughing about it, but I think I'm laughing about it because it's the most untrue thing in the entire world. Like, I okay, maybe like, aren't what are walruses known for? I mean, yes, they're big sea creature animals, but like, I why do I want to say that there's like some sort of wisdom that they bring to the table? Because that's where my mind goes. Um, I was when you no, honestly, when you first said that to me, I was like, oh, are they some sort of like wise sea animal? Like, I never would have even put it towards your weight or what your body looks like. And that's where it's like, are we really still having this conversation at this day and age?

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, there's a thousand things you could have called me. You could have called me a dung bitch, but you chose the the most low-hanging fruit.

SPEAKER_01:

Look, look, I just Googled it. Shamans tell us that Walrus Spirit is the keeper of ancient knowledge and wisdom. So there you go. Like, thank you. Thank you. You are the Yogi Walrus. That's gonna be your like some. I'm sorry. Come on. That's where my mind went.

SPEAKER_02:

No, like literally, what a time to be alive. But um, you know, like a lot of mentors have told me that when you start to have haters, that's when you know that you've made it.

SPEAKER_01:

So yeah, and you have to just be uncomfortable with it. And that's why, like, when you can laugh at your own flaws and you can laugh at yourself, no one like it's so hard to break you down, or it's so hard to like feel that shame or that anger or that sadness that perhaps someone would feel. You know what I mean? So that's why I feel like this is a beautiful entryway into our roasts because I feel like if we can't laugh at yourself, I don't know. What are we even doing?

SPEAKER_02:

What are we doing? It's not that serious.

SPEAKER_01:

It's really like the point of life, I don't think is supposed to be so serious. Like we're supposed to be here to have fun. And I feel like sometimes, especially recently, I know you mentioned in your personal life, and I can resonate with that. Like it's recently it's just been this roller coaster, and so finding joy and laughter when and where and however I can. If that includes AI, like let's go. I'm game, like I just gotta get a giggle in when I can.

SPEAKER_02:

All right, let's get into it. Roast me.

SPEAKER_01:

All right, are you ready? Yogi boy sad, and what we should say too is like we both kind of have two Instagram handles that we play around with in the interweb. So we kind of combine them both. All right, um, let's go.

unknown:

Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

Look, I am Gianrosa and nearly enlightened together is the perfect representation of a woman who is absolutely doing the inner work, but is also absolutely unhinged. Accurate. Let's start with I am Gianrosa. Oh, I am Gian Rosa. Okay, affirmation queen. We get it, girl. You are, you're not just Gian Rosa, you're the Gianurosa. The yoga you walrus chosen by the universe and probably a coupon code at Flora. Half of your followers don't know if they're getting yoga wisdom, a spiritual awakening, or a reminder to drink some water. And honestly, even you don't know until you hit post. That's kind of true, I feel. Yeah. You're that friend who says it's not Mercury retrograde, it's just you not meditating enough. Meanwhile, you overslept because you were in your DMs doing parrot readings for strangers instead of going to bed. And then we get to nearly enlightened, the most iconic spiritual branding on the internet. Nearly enlightened is so real. It's giving, I meditate daily, I journal with intention, I trust the universe, and I will lose my last microscopic rum of interface before Dash forgets the damn sauce again. You're not enlightened, you're within a striking distance, like one traffic dam away from transcendence or a mild felony.

SPEAKER_02:

Losing my damn mind.

SPEAKER_01:

I'll meet you in the parking lot with Sade in one hand and a grudge in the other. Oh, I like that. Your breath work your breath work practice, girl, you do breath work like you're hitting a bong behind me.

SPEAKER_03:

Also very true.

SPEAKER_02:

I literally cannot tell you when I first started teaching yoga how many times my best friend Nikki sat in the parking lot smoking the joint before class. So that's very accurate.

SPEAKER_01:

You're over there like inhale, hold, enlighten me, universe, and exhale before I absolutely cuss somebody out. Your feed looks like someone who radiates goddess energy until she stubs her toe and suddenly remembers every swear word learned in an Italian household since 1998. You're the first person to say everything is a lesson, and also the first to say, well, not him. He was a straight-up mistake. Yeah. No, you are you preach alignment while publicly fist fighting your tripod at 6 a.m. because the sunrise isn't sunrising correctly for your reel. You're walking contradiction in the most delicious way. You'll pull a tarot card for clarity, but if it says something you don't like, that deck goes back on the shelf real fast. You're 80% angelic softness, 20% don't test me. I'm Italian. You're healing the collective while low-key is stalking your ex's new girlfriend like she's an anthropological anthropological case study.

SPEAKER_02:

That one was that one, that one hits below the belt.

SPEAKER_01:

That one hits for my grammatical problems, but also, yeah, below the belt. You want you want peace on earth, but also want Instagram to fix your algorithm before you lose it. Your brand is spiritually with is spirituality with a side of chaos. Your aura is sage-scented with the hit of espresso of espresso-fueled vengeance. Your energy is lotus flower with brass knuckles. Oh, I love that. You're not you're not nearly enlightened, you're nearly unhinged in the most gorgeous, divinely chaotic, spiritually aligned way possible. And that, my dear, is why the people follow you, adore you, and fear you just a little bit.

SPEAKER_03:

My last line really hits.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh my gosh, that was good. My belly hurts. That was really good. Really well done, Chat Chi BT. Well done.

SPEAKER_02:

Well done.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I think that that was perfect.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, the line about the breath work that I practiced being hitting a bong behind the yoga studio. Well played, chat. Well played.

SPEAKER_00:

Well played.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, are you ready for yours? I guess. I haven't even really read it full thoroughly through, but go ahead, let's see what it spit out.

SPEAKER_02:

I haven't either. So reading things for the first time, I might sound like I don't know how to read. So here we go.

SPEAKER_00:

That's okay. We're all here.

SPEAKER_02:

I am Deirdre Lee. It's giving. I went to Panama once, and now I only drink beverages that look like swamp water but cost$14. You're the girl who takes the selfie in golden hour and captions it. Integration. Doesn't just detox. It probably has a better morning routine than 90% of adults. And yes, we know your SCOBY has a name. Honestly, probably several past lives too. Meanwhile. Anahatsa Yoga Bianastar sounds like a wellness account that recommends breath work for every inconvenience. Car won't start, breath work. Bank account low, breath work. Wi-Fi glitching, light some Palo Santo, and invite spaciousness into your router. You're not just in your feminine era, you're one mile a bead away from opening a hotline where people pay you to interpret the dreams of their host class.

SPEAKER_01:

People would probably pay for that shit too.

SPEAKER_02:

That might be a nice side business for you. Let's be honest, if anything in your home breaks, you're not calling a repair person, you're putting a rose quartz on it and whispering affirmations like this.

SPEAKER_03:

You are safe to go. Ceremony specifically.

SPEAKER_02:

The idea of grounding is walking barefoot outside while lecturing the ants about nervous system regulation. You're the friend who pulls one tarot card and suddenly everyone's releasing generational trauma and signing up for your next six-week program called Healing Your Inner Corn Goddess.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh God.

SPEAKER_02:

Enlightenment were a group project, you'd absolutely be the one showing up with color-coded planners, chakra themed stickers, and a USB diffuser, and a playlist titled Transcend but Make It Bad Bitch. Face it, you're not just a vibe. You're a whole elemental equal, you're a whole elemental ecosystem with Wi-Fi and opinions. A common thread. Honestly, kind of a fire idea.

SPEAKER_01:

I know. That's why I said like this is giving me so many good ideas.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh wow, that was just what um the doctor ordered.

SPEAKER_01:

That's what the doctor ordered. Yeah, I think so. That's why I feel like the one I did before, I was like, no, roast it a little bit harder. Like you can go a little, we can push a little bit harder than this, but I think that it's yeah, it's such a good medicine. What? Hurt my feelings.

SPEAKER_02:

There was something very therapeutic about that. I might have to do that weekly, just like let Chat GPT roast me.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I think it's yeah, I don't know what it is. Maybe someone who knows psychology better about can tell us.

SPEAKER_02:

I feel like oldest daughter things. We're used to constantly.

unknown:

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Or love like yeah, I feel like that we talk about that a lot. And I feel like I'm I don't know if I like tried to look it up, but I it was like it's a real thing.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh dirty to May.

SPEAKER_02:

So there's a Taylor Swift song on her last album.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh yeah, my sister told me about that.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, this very thing. Wait, I'm getting I'm getting the lyrics. It's called Actually Romantic.

SPEAKER_01:

Didn't she write a song about or called Eldest Daughter?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, yes, there is an eldest daughter song. Um also fire. This whole last album I really liked. Some people didn't, but I did. But in this song, she talks about a woman who like talks shit about her, but she takes it as like a Valentine, like, oh, you're actually obsessed with me. Um yeah, so she said, um tacky baby, stop talking dirty to me. It sounded nasty, but it feels like you're flirting with me.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, see, I feel like putting the spin on stuff like that. Like if you I feel like I don't know if maybe that's I don't know if it's healthy or unhealthy, but I feel like if it's making you laugh and you can find medicine in it, I feel like that's kind of that's good.

SPEAKER_02:

I know you think it comes off vicious, but it's precious, adorable, like a toy chihuahua barking at me from a tiny purse. That's how much it hurts. Ooh. Lyrical genius.

SPEAKER_03:

The poet of our time, I'll die on that hill. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't have much to say. I'm not, I can't consider myself a Swiftie.

SPEAKER_02:

I am like real Swifties would call me a bandwagon fan, and I I'll wear that.

SPEAKER_01:

I'll wear that. I'm I'm happy for you. I feel like, well, when I was back in Massachusetts, um my sister had a very nice little dinner where they listened to the new album together, her and his girlfriends. And I was there, I was present, but the only thing I can remember really is oh yeah. I don't even know if I'm saying that right, but like that's it. And I don't I don't like listen to it. I think I only really listen to it if I like need to have a good cry when I miss my sister. Um like I don't like put it on, you know, like I'm I'm gonna put on some Benito, like I'm gonna listen to Bad Benny or something on my way to yoga.

SPEAKER_02:

It's all about balance.

SPEAKER_01:

It is, it is.

SPEAKER_02:

That's why I got malibads in one hand and a cannoli in the other hand. It's fine.

SPEAKER_01:

Amen. Hey, I think that that's like what we're here, what we're here to do, and I think that that's like too a great segue. I feel like you and I working together, and we decided that we're gonna offer it's time to do the challenge again.

SPEAKER_02:

It is time to do the challenge again. I think it's a great way to like wrap up the year, and um, so it's funny, this morning I I found a new love for TikTok, which another thing that I hate to admit, but there I am in the TikTok world.

SPEAKER_01:

You have a lot of bandwagons. You guys should you have a very long caravan happening today.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm in like the visible era, like here I am. You're gonna be fucking sick of me.

SPEAKER_01:

No, and we entertained. So, like you be the yogi walrus at the beginning of this caravan with your whip, and you just go, girl. I'm right there. I'll sit, I'll sit on one of those wagons and I'll fix the wheel if it gets flat, the axle.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh great, because we're charging forward, we're forward movement. I think like a lot of the things that have happened in the last year and a half, like uh, how do I want to say this? I am somebody who puts all of my focus into like one thing, and sometimes it's not the correct thing, and I've let certain things and certain people distract me from my purpose, and the last year and a half was very distracting because I was with someone and I told myself that I wouldn't give him like attention, and I don't want to do that um because he doesn't deserve it. But I allowed my energy to be spread in a way that and and this is a common theme for me, it's not just like unique to this, but I allowed my energy to kind of be siphoned into this one person. Um and uh like not that other things fell by the wayside because the podcast had the best year yet. We literally have thousands of listeners. So if you're listening to my nonsense right now, like thank you for being here, thank you for sharing, and just making this podcast grow. Because never in my life would I think that we are at the point where literally thousands of people are listening across 39 countries. That's fucking insane. That's insane. Uh so it's time, the time has come, the walrus said the neck and wait, what I missed that. I missed the punchline.

SPEAKER_03:

The time has come, the walrus said.

SPEAKER_01:

You know that boat. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This I'm sorry, whoever said this is a genius. Okay, sorry, the time has come.

SPEAKER_02:

Someday, I mean might have the time has come.

SPEAKER_01:

I think, and what you're sharing is it definitely resonates. I think me as well in the beginning of the year before we even did the first challenge. Um, I think that I was also having a couple different experiences where I was exposing or yeah, just allowing my energy and giving my energy to things that maybe necessarily, I don't want to say weren't deserving, um, but I don't think that my priorities were correct. And I think I learned a lot this year from having those experiences and understanding and aligning with more clarity what my what my priorities are.

SPEAKER_02:

And I think professionally with the TikTok that I saw this morning, it was she was like an astrologer and into like quantum physics and all that stuff, and she was saying how so this is a nine year, it's the year of the snake, and because the Chinese new year doesn't happen until the new moon in February, that's when the new so yes, the the number is gonna change, right? So we're going from 2025 to 2026, but we're still gonna be in that snake energy for for about a month and a half, and that's the real like shedding of the things that we learned this year. It's the shedding of the skin and integrating new scales, and I kind of like liked the way she put that, and then moving into the horse energy, and we're going from a year nine to a year one. One we're like not just closing a chapter, but we're closing an entire book.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And we're putting that away, and we're literally starting like a whole new book. And that doesn't mean that we're gonna like wake up new people, but right now, especially coming out of the Mercury retrograde, and then we're coming into the end of the year, it's really a time to look at the things that we've learned this year to shed the things that need to be shed so that we can forward and and like horse energy. So think about a horse, it's like very forward moving, and usually we go. So this year is masculine energy, year nine, year one. Usually we go from masculine energy to feminine energy and it flips back and forth, but the one is also masculine energy. So we're gonna be in a very like do go move forward, and not in a way that we're like burning ourselves out. That was a big lesson collectively this year, is like learning how to balance your energy and not to like run yourself into the ground. And that is very much something that came up for me this year, is like I was expending all of my energy out to like help get this person's life back on track and like get him in a better place and like just move forward so that we could like move forward together and build a life and blah blah blah. But like the truth always comes out, God reveals the truth, and like we weren't working on the same page, and I think it's also like knowing who is using your energy for their own gain and benefit and to literally quantum leave, and who's just gonna like use you and leave you behind, and who your real true circle is, and God will always reveal who is meant to be in your circle, and I think all away, especially when you're about to level up. So I know I'm in that space of like leveling up. So that's why I say, like, get ready to hear from me all the time. I'm launching a teacher training, I'm a co-owner of a studio now. Um, the podcast is popping off, and we're only going up from here. I have big vision and goals for the Nearly Enlightened podcast. Um, and like we've talked about this a little bit. I'm starting to curate a list of like dream podcast guests, and it's coming, it's in the field, it's like in the energy. I feel it. Martha's on this podcast. We're gonna interview her. It's happening.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, and I think it's it's a good time to mention too. One of the reasons why we want to share and do the um challenge together again is because we're hoping to offer our mentorship at the beginning of the year. So think about that if you are interested. Stay tuned and do the challenge with us so you can get a taste of our medicine, what we want to bring and share, whether you're a teacher or a student. I think it's important.

SPEAKER_02:

And I think so, I'll speak just for me, but like the last time we did the challenge, we talked about it a lot. We were like, okay, we offered this to everyone who listens to the podcast, who follows us on social media, our students. But really deep down the challenge was for us.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes.

SPEAKER_02:

And it was like, I think that month was a huge leap forward for us. And I think that like again, I'll speak for myself, not for you, but I'm in a space where like I kind of need the challenge again myself.

SPEAKER_01:

No, I think we both are. I think we're both in a space where we've, you know, we both had different circumstances come up, but I think we're both in a space where we had to have some experiences that broke us. Yeah, and kind of like went through them together in a way. And now we're kind of like, okay, yeah, no, we need like we're here to do this work together.

SPEAKER_02:

And around, we're not getting distracted this time.

SPEAKER_01:

Like, yeah, yeah. And I think it was interesting because when we did do it, it was like it was, it felt really cohesive. It felt really like, I don't want to say easy, but it was like it was definitely challenging. I think we pushed ourselves as individually, but I think we both like the accountability that we held each other was really wonderful. And I think at the end of that, we both expanded into new opportunities. Um, I could say professionally for sure. So, you know, I think that's just that's just 28 days of dedicating yourself to the eight limbs of yoga and learning a little bit more about yourself and the roots of yoga and how you can bring that off the mat out of the studio and into your everyday life and truly the magic and the essence of what yoga is. I think it was just like a, I don't know, a true testament for me for like, okay, no, yeah, like this is the path that I want to be working.

SPEAKER_02:

And it's just like like yoga is so much more than a movement practice. It literally is a lifestyle. And that's like something that we're trying to cultivate here in the studio and at Soul Sanctuary is this isn't something we dabble in for fun. This isn't like a cute, trendy thing that we do to post on our Instagram. Like, this is life. Like, this isn't just my career. This, like, I made a career out of these principles and 10 years' experience.

SPEAKER_01:

Like, I want to say to anyone who's like interested in your yoga teacher training that you're gonna be offering, ask questions. And if you have the opportunity, go. Because here's the thing I, you know what I mean, you and I met online a few years ago, but I will tell you that I think we can both, I mean, I'll speak for myself, but I think that you'll agree with me when I say this. Yoga practices and teachings, like I think anyone who has the opportunity to learn from you, it's it would be such an honor and a huge opportunity for themselves. Because I think a lot of what happens in the West is that obviously things get whitewashed down. Um, you know, even I want to say whitewashed, but just diluted. And I think you do an incredible job. Whereas, like when if you wanted to become a yoga teacher thousands of years ago, you would have to study four years.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, so we couldn't because we have a vagina.

SPEAKER_01:

Exact, exactly. Okay, so point one. Um, and so you you would have to like it would take years, and in the West, it's being pumped out in a month, and so there's so much to learn. And I think I don't know what makes I think what makes me a good teacher, what makes you a good teacher is the experience we have of all of the practice we have of teaching. And so I think that people should run at this opportunity to learn from you and to take this teacher training because the knowledge that you have to share come learn is Yogi Walrus. Come and sit and learn the laws of the walrus. I feel like it's a mountain we're both screaming on. Um, that this work is really deep, and it's not it's a collective level, it's an individual level, it's in the studio, but it's also so much outside of the studio and within yourself. And I think that I don't know, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I think that well, that's why it's so transformative, right?

SPEAKER_01:

And like that's the word I wanted to say, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Teacher training without ever having the intention of teaching. And I've talked about this before. When I did my first 200-hour teacher training, it was because first of all, I was healing from the same relationship that I'm currently healing from now, because it has been a 12-year-old uphill battle.

SPEAKER_01:

Full full circle, the book is closing.

SPEAKER_02:

The book is closing. Um and I really was just trying to find myself. Like I had been practicing yoga for three years at that point, which isn't really a long time. Um and I I wasn't doing it with the intention of teaching. So I think that that's like a huge misconception, is like you're doing this 200-hour teacher training, like you have to teach. And like granted, I ended up teaching, um, but I think that's because more it was like destined for me. Even you do like the Enneagram numbers. Mine is a number four, which is the teacher. I was like literally destined to be the teacher, even though I was like trying to push it away with you're also a projector.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, you're also a projector.

SPEAKER_02:

I was trying to push it away with like every fiber of my being, but literally from weekend one of my first teacher training, the teacher was like, listen, start practice teaching now, get comfortable speaking in front of people. Whatever, whatever. And I actually did it. Even though at that time I was like, I'm not gonna teach yoga. Like I had just finished up my degree. My degree was in fashion merchandising and retail marketing. And granted, I was working for Lulu Lemon, so very like yoga principal yoga adjacent. But yeah, I like didn't have any intention of teaching. And it was Jamie Gray who is the per the reason why we're friends, and um also on this podcast before one of my best friends, one of your best friends. Um she was like, No, no, no, you are teaching. And she literally put me on the schedule at her gym the day after I finished teacher training. And that was the only that was the catalyst to be like, okay, this wasn't just for me. Like, yes, it was, and it was extremely transformative and literally enhanced my life in a way that I cannot put into words. Like you can't describe it unless you experience it, and it's the most it's a challenging experience. There's a lot of energy expenditure, it's a lot of um dedication and discipline to show up and to do the work to even just complete, even just scoop by and complete it, it's a lot of work, right? Right, yeah, the most worth it. Like it is, I just can't put it into words, it's just so transformative. And so I'm excited because I've done several teacher trainings at this point. I have over a thousand classifications. Um and like you said, I've been teaching now for over 10 years. And when you're teaching, you're not just teaching, you're you're still learning, you're still a student. And I'm excited to lead a teacher training because I think not only is it gonna be transformative for everyone else, but I think that it's going to be like a kind of a new level for me as a teacher.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I think it's gonna just blow open a lot of stuff and growth for you. And yeah, I think I'm really excited for you, and I hope that I can participate in some way in the future with you, and you know, whether it's learning from you or alongside with you, because I think it's important. I think it's important work and medicine that you're sharing. And like I said, anyone who's thinking about it, run.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and I was uh, this is the other point that I lost. My teacher in the first teacher training, she would say throughout the training all the time, like, you don't really know who you are as a teacher, and you're a baby teacher until you reach that 10-year point. And then once you reach that 10-year point, then you're like, you're not a newborn teacher anymore. Now you're like a toddler teacher. And I'm definitely seeing that shift um in in my teaching and like the way I show up and how I present my classes now. It's a lot different than with good reason, like than when I first started teaching, but I feel more like in my groove, like you can't fuck with me kind of vibe. Um so yeah, I'm excited for this for this new chapter. I'm excited, I'm nervous in in like a very you know, healthy way.

SPEAKER_01:

Um that's the best kind of nervous, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Also, like curious as like where we're going next, and you know, I know God doesn't take away without giving you something better in return. So um, as everyone who listens to this podcast knows, like in the last three, three and a half years, I've experienced a lot of loss. Um a lot of loss. Like even now, my my beloved G the end. And so, like, literally every single thing have not every single thing, I shouldn't say that. That's not correct, but a lot of things that I love and that I kind of identified with part as part of my identity has been taken away from me, and um non-attachment, non-attachment. Literally, the last three years such a lesson in non-attachment, and I am not good at that, especially because like with this person I was with, he was always somebody who I thought, like, even though we had the most tumultuous relationship, like I always thought he was somebody that I was going to spend the rest of my life with um since I met him when we were in college. And like, you can't make other people do the work, right? Right. And it's hard because I do think that people can change, I do think that people can decide to be better and do better and to do the deep inner work, but I think that it's important to realize that not everyone is cut out to do the deep inner work, and those people's lifetime, yeah. Yeah, and ultimately, like those people, like not to be dramatic, but like those people will bring you down. They will absolutely bring you down. Um, and I know I'm the villain in his story because I've walked away from him like three or four times, but like, dude, I've walked away from you three or four times because you're a liar and a fucking cheater, period. Yeah. And like sometimes that just doesn't change, and you can forgive someone without giving them access. And you know, like he had reached out this week. Literally, this is how diabolical this man is. He reached out this week and was like, Hope you're having a good day. It's like, well, I was until the devil just texted me.

SPEAKER_01:

We need to block them. I know. I'm not there yet, though. And yeah, I think that that's I think that's definitely gonna be part of it is the blocking. Yeah, because this is where the the the energy leak leaks in. So we're gonna do this challenge, and maybe you'll find it within you at the end.

SPEAKER_02:

So that's like a new thing for me. Um, because not that I've been anti-therapy, like I think there are good therapists and I think there are bad therapists, and I think that it's important to find a good one. Um, and I am working with somebody on just like building that secure attachment because I do think people who are healers tend to be a little bit of overgivers, overdoers, over-functioners. And like that's exactly what I was doing. Like, I came into the relationship knowing that he was not in a great space, and he was as honest as he could be, which isn't very honest, but he said, like, right now, like I it can't be a 50-50 relationship, it can't be like a hundred-a hundred relationship, like you gotta kind of give more. And I was, and I think it was definitely like taken advantage of, and I just think he's the type of person who like will never be 50-50, never be a hundred-a hundred. Like if my life was falling apart, like I probably couldn't depend on him. So that is just like eye-opening. I said I wasn't gonna give him this platform or attention, and I have, um, but yeah, so in therapy working on that because I am ready to live um the life you deserve. Yes, and like a quiet life with somebody that I love and that loves me, and I think that was the missing piece. Because some people like people can only meet you as far as they've met themselves, and he is just really unwilling to take a deep long look within. And like I said, I'm the villain in his story again, um, which is crazy because you literally spent a year and a half lying to my face and living a secret life behind my back. But yeah, I'm the one that's fucked up because I was bringing it to your attention and holding you accountable for your fucked up moral compass and bad behavior. Um, when you're used to getting a pass from everyone in your life.

SPEAKER_01:

So it's hard to be, it's a challenging place to be when you're someone who's not afraid to hold up a mirror to someone, or like they're held up to you.

SPEAKER_02:

Like that was one of the things that got to my attention as like, oh, you expect all everyone around you to like do all of these things and step up and be a good person, but like you're not. And I was just like, Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

You have to love yourself more, I think, in this way.

SPEAKER_02:

I need to love myself like I love other people.

SPEAKER_01:

That's yes, that's what I mean. Like, you've gotta love yourself as much as you give out to other people. I think that that's what your mirror has been through all this. If I could give you my two cents. I'm always my walrus my walrus opinion, that's what it would be. And I think, you know, relationships are hard, and I think I think that they I think we have them to have lessons and to learn from them. And I think that as you said, things that aren't as expansive when they're quote unquote taken away or go or leave, something better will come through. And I really believe that for you. So I think that this, you know, coming full circle again and coming back and doing the challenge again and offering it to people who want to join with us is a perfect time. Perfect time to do perfect time, yeah. It's like a nice reset.

SPEAKER_02:

Let me tell you, and not that I'm not allowing myself to heal, it's been like two months. Um, and before, when we have like we've gone back and forth now. This is like literally the third or fourth, fifth time, I don't even know. Um, I've gone years before I dated again. And I'm gonna be 35 in June. I'm not waiting years anymore. Like I'm not bypassing the healing either. Like I'm fully immersed in this work, and I'm like I said, I'm in therapy, I'm doing the work. Uh, I'm showing up every single day to do the work, and sometimes it's really fucking hard. Um, but I'm I'm doing it because I do know there's better on the other side. And this is an opportunity for me to quantum leap. And like I posted a funny uh reel and TikTok about it, about just being kind of like in my villain era, because like I've let a look like a few too many things slide, and I am like a spicy Italian girl, like I will take my hoops out and fight you. Um, and I think I need to remember her a little bit because I there's like a fine line between being a peacekeeper and being a doormat. And when I kept forgiving him for the same thing, like he kept lying, I kept forgiving, he kept lying, I kept forgiving. It's like, no, you're not changing the behavior, though. So like I'm the problem at this point. Like, I can't keep forgiving you knowing you're not gonna change and you're crossing my boundaries.

SPEAKER_01:

So yeah, now it's time for me to go to take personal responsibility for your life. And I think you know, it is a hard and scary thing when you had this vision of what you intended or the intention behind you know what you wanted for not even for yourself, but also for the relationship. And I think sometimes when we when we attach expectations, it's like when it doesn't work, sometimes that kind of points out where we're trying to control things, and like we can't. Like we can't like as much in and then it just forms like this resistance and resentment, and it's a really challenging place to be and to feel, but I'm proud of you for feeling it all and working through it and not completely shutting down and out and being open to what's to come. And yeah, I believe that there is good on the other side of it.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, all that to say that I downloaded two dating apps over the weekend and then promptly deleted them because it's fucking wild out there, and that is not the place I'm gonna meet somebody. It is wild dating in your 30s, like awful.

SPEAKER_01:

I was gonna yeah, I was gonna ask you because I mean, I don't even, I have no idea. I've never been on one, and I don't know if that I would, I don't even know. I would probably get into so much trouble if I tried that.

SPEAKER_02:

No, it's just these men out here are all man children, and I shouldn't say this because this is like not what I'm attracting. I know that there's a lot of great men out there, I just have not met them yet.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. And I and also not to close it down completely because I know people who have had very successful, like married with children relationships come out of online dating.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, so it's like I wonder like guys just want a pen bow. Like they just want somebody who they can text on their phone and then like not really do the work. And like, ugh, I'm not into that. Like, I want like 1950s style chivalry.

SPEAKER_01:

Like, I here's the thing, here's the thing, and here's the lesson that too that is coming out of all this is like you are just honing in on your filter and what you really want. Like you're finding yourself, like, thank you. Thank you for allowing me to truly understand what I want and deserve in my life for myself and for my partner.

SPEAKER_02:

And I've learned a lot of like in the past, I've learned a lot about what I don't want, and that's come from what you don't want. Sometimes that attracts what you don't want. Learn to be like, oh, wait, let before I spend another year and a half here, like not this. So I am focusing on what I do want, and I keep telling God, like, listen, I have learned from the heartbreak. I have learned from the betrayal. Now is time to learn from love, and that is the only thing that I'm accepting.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, I love that. What a beautiful way. Write that down, walrus late walrus lady. The Yogi Walrus, yeah, is learning from love. Yes, is learning from love, learning from a place of love because that's where you heal in love, I think.

SPEAKER_02:

So, all that to say, um, we're learning from love in this challenge this time. Yeah, and I think that's gonna come through. So join us. We're starting December 1st. I will probably link it in the show notes. If not, you can check out both of our social medias. Um we're about to talk about it a lot and probably be very annoying.

SPEAKER_01:

No, informative. Informative. We're about to write walrus wisdom. With walrus wisdom. We're coming in with it full force. And I think it's yeah, I think it's gonna be, I think it's perfect timing, and I think it would be fun.

SPEAKER_02:

I hope that we during a very affordable price point,$27.99. It's less than a dollar a day, is what it comes out to.

SPEAKER_01:

Less than a dollar a day to dedicate time to yourself.

SPEAKER_02:

It is honestly like such a deep dive study, and I think that was one of the takeaways from the first the first time we ran this, it was free, and there were a lot of yoga teachers in the challenge, and literally every single one of them. I mean, we had over 50 people in the challenge last time. It was crazy. Yeah. So, like all of the yoga teachers that were in there. I mean, I I would tell you all the time, everyone here, why is this free? You guys are fucking nuts. Like, there is so much information here. This is like a teacher training in itself.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. So that and this, so this is this, yeah, I feel like this is to kind of giving if you weren't with us in the last challenge, come with us on this one. So if you are interested in a mentorship with us, it'll give you kind of a glimpse of what we have to offer and what we want to share. Because we both something we both definitely agree on is that a lot of the times in the West, the 200 hours um certifications get pumped out, and then what?

SPEAKER_02:

Then what?

SPEAKER_01:

And it's not an and like it's not enough.

SPEAKER_02:

200 hours, you're only doing about 130 to 150 hours in person. So it's yep, it's not even really 200 hours, which is so crazy.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, and I think like I just try to put myself back in that in the in the shoes of a student or someone at the teacher training. And if I had an ability to find a mentor like either one of us, I would be like, Where do I sign? You know, where do I you know what I mean? Because I just feel like it's it would give you that much more confidence to be able to learn with someone who aligns with what you believe, and um yeah, just really get down to the actual roots to share the the ancient wisdom, not just the asana. How can you bring that into your class?

SPEAKER_02:

You finish your teacher training and then you're thrown out into the world. And one of the things that I experienced was like, I think I taught one of my very first classes, it was a yoga one-on-one class. So stark beginners were coming, a lot of injured people post-surgery. I fucking panicked because I was like, I didn't know anything. I know some poses, I know how to leak them together, I know how to lead breath work. I don't know shoulder um injuries and yeah, rotator cuff repair, knee replacements. Like, I didn't know how to deal with any of that. So having a mentor, like kind of on speed dial, would have been such a game changer. But I think it was also a blessing, too, because that is what made me do a million other teacher trainings, because I was like, okay, this is a 6,000 year old science. Like, uh, I have only scratched the surface. I will never know everything that there is to know about yoga. But I have this like thirst of curiosity that I just had to learn more. And I think I'm not saying that I'm like the very best yoga teacher, but I'm saying that the very best yoga teachers are always working with that curiosity. And that's what makes them yoga teachers. And you will know them when you meet them. Like you will know the good percent from the great yoga teachers, from like, okay, there's something different about this teacher. Mm-hmm. 100%.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. Yeah. Or even like, yeah, sometimes when I receive comments after class and stuff, it's like just affirmation. Okay, like I did my job here. You know, like, oh, I didn't know this about that, or the way you had us, you know, just move so subtly that, you know, like it's anatomy. It's all the eight limbs. It's there's so much that goes into it. And so yeah, you have to do continuing education and as a as uh as an instructor. And I think that that sometimes gets pushed by the wayside. Um, but I think that both of us have a lot of valuable information and knowledge to share with people. And I mean, I I would feel honored if someone or when people come to us as mentees. Um I think it would just be such a beautiful learning experience for everybody.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, I agree.

SPEAKER_01:

I agree. So I'm excited for what's to come, what what may be. Same. We're open. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Same. Big things happening. Year one, new book, new chapter. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

We're learning. I'm ready. We're learning, we're learning from love, we're learning in love. Moving forward.

SPEAKER_02:

That's a beautiful place to wrap up. You got anything else for us?

SPEAKER_01:

I have no idea. I mean, I probably have lots of things, but I'm gonna go have some lunch and maybe do some Reiki over my tomatoes. I shouldn't be laughing because it's a real thing, and I actually do do that sometimes.

SPEAKER_02:

And actually, like, there are a fair amount of people who would probably pay extra for organic Reiki-infused tomatoes. Like, let's be real.

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, I even had no joke have done it over like distance Reiki for people's like packages. Uh I mean, I if you believe it's energy, it's all of this that we're talking about is energy. So I think that it is important work. As fun as it is to laugh about it and to find humor in it all, it also is a real energetic wisdom that I do believe and love to share. So I'm gonna go do that.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Um, I know we've mentioned your handles, but where can the people find you?

SPEAKER_01:

The people can find me at I am Deirdre Lee. And you can also find me at uh anahata. Uh yeah, you're yo yoga.bnstar. I had to think there for a second, but maybe just put those in the show notes because I know sometimes even my name is hard to definitely.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, thank you for being here with us today. It's always a pleasure to have you.

SPEAKER_01:

Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_02:

Your yogi walruses, just oh here, chick-chat. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Our big teeth. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, thank you all so much for tuning in to today's episode of the Nearly Enlightened Podcast. If this conversation resonated with you, I would love it if you shared it, left a review, or you could reach out to me directly and let me know your thoughts. If you're looking for more ways to deepen your connection to body, mind, and spirit, check out my Meditate to Elevate Guided Meditation portal or visit nearlyenlightened.com for more resources. Until next time, stay curious, stay connected, and remember the answers already lie within.