The Scent of a Woman: Everything You Should Know About Her Vagina

Almost every woman has wondered it in silence: Is my scent normal? Do I taste okay? Is something wrong with me down there? Almost none of us were ever given the information to answer — so we carry the worry straight into the bedroom, where it quietly steals our confidence and our pleasure. This week, we fix that. This is the owner's manual nobody handed you.

I sit down with Wendy Strgar — vaginal microbiome health expert, lovologist, and founder of Good Clean Love, the company she started in her own kitchen to solve her own problems. We get into what's actually normal, what's not, and why understanding this body — yours or your partner's — is the foundation for everything good that happens in bed.

In this episode:

• Vulva vs. vagina — what's what, and why the difference matters
• What a healthy scent and taste actually are (and what an "off" one is telling you)
• The vaginal microbiome, pH, and why so many women get misdiagnosed for years
• The clitoral organ system — the 10,000-nerve-ending powerhouse most of us were never taught about
• Why partners share responsibility for her vaginal health
• Three things you can do tonight to get comfortable, informed, and free in bed

Bring a pen — the takeaways are worth writing down.

🎧 Find Wendy at https://goodcleanlove.com/ 

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wendy.strgar/
• Substack: https://wendystrgar.substack.com/

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Transcript

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New Name Same Locker Room

SPEAKER_01 1:02

I'm Annette Benedetti, host of the podcast formerly known as Locker Room Talk and Shots. The show has a new name, Talk Sex with Annette. But at its core, this is still your locker room. It's where we strip away shame, get curious, and speak the unspoken about sex, kink dating, pleasure, and desire. Around here, nothing's off limits. These are the kinds of conversations we save for our boldest group chat, our most trusted friends, and of course, the women's locker room. Think raw, honest, and sometimes unapologetically raunchy. Welcome to my podcast where desire meets disruption and pleasure becomes power. Let's talk about sex. Cheers.

Why Scent Worries Kill Pleasure

SPEAKER_01 1:47

Today's talk sex with a net topic is the scent of a woman. Everything you should know about vulvas and vaginas. Almost every woman has wondered at some point, is my scent normal? Do I taste okay? Does it look right? Is something wrong with me down there? And almost none of us were ever given the information to answer those questions. So we carry the worry silently and it follows us right into the bedroom where it quietly stills our confidence and our pleasure. And here's the part for partners listening, especially my guys. What you understand about her body and how you respond to it can be the difference between her feeling free or self-conscious and closed down in bed. This episode is for all of you. Today we are fixing that. This is the full owner's manual nobody handed you.

Meet Wendy And Where To Follow

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Wendy, welcome to Talk Sex with Annette. And I'm gonna have you introduce yourselves to yourself to my listeners a little bit more in one moment. But before we dive in, I have to remind y'all to find me on OnlyFans where I am offering my demos, audio guided self-pleasure, meditations, and so much more. I'm also on Substack, where I am now publishing the video version of my podcast. So you can go to Substack and watch this video there if you are an audio listener. Now, you can find me in both places with my handle at TalkSex with the net or scroll down to the notes section below and you're gonna have all the links there to find Wendy and myself wherever you want to find us. Wendy, can you tell my listeners a little bit more about you now?

SPEAKER_00 3:58

Yeah, I have been working on women's health, like you said, since over 25 years. And I started Good Clean Love, as you mentioned, in my kitchen, because I was trying to find a way to remain sexual after my fourth child. And I learned so much in that process. It helped me develop what we call Biomatch, which is our approach to building all of our products at Good Clean Love and now Good Clean Clinical Care, which is a telemedicine site that I just now launched. So it's the last baby I'm ever gonna have. And I also have a company called Vaginal Biome Science, where we do national studies trying to understand why so many women are misdiagnosed when they go to the doctor and why so many women struggle with their vaginal health, two-thirds of women actually, and have current recurrent infections or chronic symptoms that they just can't get solutions for. And so we're doing this really cool national study, trying to understand what the microbiome is telling us at that moment of diagnosis. So all things vaginal and sexual health, I spend all my days doing, and I'm really grateful to do it.

SPEAKER_01 5:09

Well, thank you for joining us. There are so many reasons why y'all are gonna want to stay all the way through into the end of this podcast episode. A lot of the blocks to really good intimacy between couples comes down to how comfortable and knowledgeable a woman is with her own body. And what we're gonna be talking about today is going to clear up a lot of the things that keep women from being comfortable with their own body and feeling confident in bed. When you're worried about things like taste and smell and what's going on down there in bed, it makes it really hard to have free, fun, truly connected sex. So, of course, you're gonna want to stay to the end for those takeaways where you can have instant, actionable things you can start doing tonight to have better sex, but also to understand your body, her body better. So I am ready to dive in and let's cheers to vaginas. Let's talk about them.

Vulva Vs Vagina And Microbiome

SPEAKER_01 6:12

Well, I want to start with what seems incredibly basic, but I think is important. Let's talk about the terms vagina, vulva, the difference, what's what. Let's start with that.

SPEAKER_00 6:26

Yeah, so I think that's a great place to start because when we use the word vagina, we're really talking about what's inside, right? From the moment of penetration. And when we were when we talk about vulva, that's actually the labia and the clitoral area on the outside. The clitoris is actually, and I really hope we can dive into this, an organ system that starts with a gland on the outside, but actually has legs that goes all the way deep into the very back of your vagina where your G spot actually exists. And so when we talk about vulvar health or how you feel with your vulva, that's like your external tissue. That's what you can see and touch, right? And your vagina is more where you would put a tampon or gel or something inside. So that's so is it inside, is it outside? But honestly, the tissue is very similar. It's mucus membrane. And all of that mucous membrane actually is the same mucus membrane that's in your mouth or in your sinuses or in your gut microbiome. And so the thing that when I talk about vaginal microbiome, I think it's really important to realize that everything you've ever learned about your gut microbiome, which everybody's heard of something about it, actually applies in your vagina too. And that's why it's so important because that's our immune function in our body. It's three pounds of bacteria that keeps us safe from all kinds of diseases. And so really wanting to keep that, to restore that and maintain that really helps with all of the vaginal symptoms and vulvar symptoms that you might be having. What is a vaginal microbiome, though? So a vaginal microbiome, like I said, I think that when I first explained this to people, I ask people to think about what they know about their gut microbiome, right? So we have heard about it for years and years. Ever since I was relatively young, people have been talking about it. And now probiotics sells more than antibiotics, which is a huge breakthrough in life. But so basically the microbiome, the gut and the vaginal microbiome, is a community of bacteria. And in the gut, it's a much more complex community, which is to say many more bacteria, both good and bad, live there than in the vagina, which is a simpler or more the less bacteria you have there, the better, because there's a host of native bacteria that's supposed to be there. But many, many women have bacteria, toxic bacteria because their pH is really high. And many of the products that women might be buying to either clean themselves or use for sex are actually at a very high pH. So all kinds of influences in the world are pushing your pH up in your vaginal microbiome, which is not good because that's where healthy bacteria die and unhealthy bacteria thrive. So basically, if you're using products that are at a 7 pH, you're making a bacteria party in your vagina, which is the thing that causes the odor and the bad taste. So it's like odor, bad taste, all the things we most worry about is really a reflection of what kind of bacteria you're hosting. And so working on maintaining a low pH, which is the biggest most important lever in keeping the good bacteria thriving there, that's where you get that sweet smell. That's where it tastes like you and not some bad bacteria. So that's how a vaginal microbiome works in the most basic way.

What Normal Smell And Taste Mean

SPEAKER_01 10:05

So for the lay person, I know the first question, the questions they really want me to get to are very simple, which are what is a normal smell or scent, a healthy scent? What is a healthy or normal taste? Many women have avoided touching, even touching, but smelling or tasting their own vaginal secretions.

SPEAKER_00 10:32

Yeah, I know it's crazy. Actually, so a lot of women, it's true, don't even know what normal is, right? They don't have a reference point. What I would say is that I love sex, so I just want to say that I don't have that issue. But when you're in balance, so I just want to say everybody has a normal, sexy, musky smell, right? And it's unique to each of us, right? Because we all have a different combination of bacteria that inhabit us. But but the the smell and the taste should be a turn-on for you, even to your own scent. And but it's easy to fall into a place where it's kind of sour, it smells off, it has uh maybe bad egg smell, even sometimes. And these different scents and also the different discharges that go with these scents that are off, right? I know when I travel a lot, because I don't always have the best bacteria, I have to do a regimen that keeps that true. And when I travel and I use a lot of toilets and I'm under a lot of stress, I can smell that right away when I go to the bathroom, even. I don't even need to be having sex that it's off. And then I have this regimen that we built at Good Clean Love that I can get back to it. But essentially I need to bring my pH down and reintroduce healthy bacteria so that so that I can get back to that normal, sweet, musky, very sexy smell, honestly. It's extremely sexy when you're when you're in balance, your vagina's in balance, and you've got a little bit of your own fluids happening. But there's a lot of women, Annette, that for multiple reasons, either they're in perimenopause or postmenopause, or someplace in that they might be postpartum. There's all kinds of things that happen to us with our hormones in our reproductive journey that really affect how our vagina feels and the kind of bacteria that you're able to protect or not, and the way you smell. And women who go through cancer, now there's more and more women who are younger and younger who go through cancer and chemical menopause, where it's a really abrupt termination of your estrogen. It's like these women don't just have vaginal dryness, right? They have an acute form of vaginal dryness where the tissue even adheres to itself. I just think we dismiss and we don't teach women the tools they need to find balance again. And there's so many reasons, right? You have sex and you don't use protection, so you have sperm in you, that's pushing your pH up. You could be walking around in a wet bathing suit in the summer or tight yoga pants that can push your pH up. You get your period, that pushes your pH up. So your vaginal microbiome is dynamic and it's constantly responding to your environment and what's happening, just like your gut, right? You could feel really good, you're eating really good food, and then whoa, you go on a trip to New Orleans, and you're eating all the stuff you can and you drinking a lot there, then your microbiome's not going to feel the same, right? But so then it's like it takes a few days to bring it back to what's what's balanced. And so it's not like there's ever this thing that you just fix it and then you're fixed, right? It's really a deep reflection of your health. Your microbiome really reflects are you sleeping well, are you eating nutritious foods that your body can digest? Are you taking care of your hygiene properly? All of those things impact how you feel and certainly impact your vaginal health and your

BV Yeast Misdiagnosis And Partner Hygiene

SPEAKER_00 14:17

vul.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

So I'll be vulnerable and transparent and tell you a little bit about my own journey. When I was young, I'm talking young, uh teenager, uh, I was on antibiotics a lot. I had ear infections and tonsil infections recurrent. And so I in my teen years, I started having what they were diagnosing as recurrent yeast infections. My mother also suffered from this, which of course, early on, I had to go into the doctor. They would give you the monostat, then you have the which would burn burn itself. And as I then started to have partners later on, I would get teased about it. It was horrifically embarrassing. And I broke up with one boyfriend and he went to everyone and talked about my yeast infection problem. But it was as I got older, the monostat wasn't fixing everything. I I am confident I was being misdiagnosed because then later on BV came into play. And of course, I didn't know at the time, men who like to make fun of women for vaginal imbalance, oftentimes it's your fault. You can disrupt our pH, meaning we aren't the problem. You are, but a hundred percent so you were talking about high pH and low pH. Now, my understanding as I've come along is that high pH and I I might have this backwards, is BV low pH indicates yeast infection. I interestingly enough, once I started taking probiotics specifically for vaginal health, I I take them every day, and I discovered boric acid. I it's been years and years and years since I've had any difficulties at all. But can we dive into some of the signs that might indicate? I I don't when I was young, I don't remember a scent or smell. I just remember pain.

SPEAKER_00 16:26

Yeah, I'm so sorry that happened, but it's so common. So I just want to tell you that you are not unusual at all. So anybody who's listening, that is really way more common than uncommon. In fact, you could actually, if it makes you feel any better, only a third of women are born with a microbiome that protects them constantly. And another third never has the right microbiome. They never have healthy protective bacteria. And the middle third is always struggling to get back to something healthy. And the more antibiotics you take because of other things, ear infections, tonsils, sinus infections, you the antibiotics are affecting your whole body. So they're killing all of the good bacteria throughout your microbiome, right? What they're going for in your sinuses, your ears, or your tonsils, that affects your vaginal health too, right? So every time you kill all of the good bacteria, it's harder and harder for that bacteria to replicate and to come back. And so frequently it's replaced by a different kind of bacteria, which is somewhat healthy, but not healthy in the way your original bacteria might actually be. Truthfully, Annette, I just want to tell you that I'm probably one of the only women you'll ever meet that was given money to study vaginal health. And we don't spend money and we don't spend time doing critical research in women's health. Frequently, when we're learning things, and I have a chief science officer who's a PhD microbiologist, she tells me over and over again, there's no research on this, there isn't anything she can even go back to and learn, right? So we're we're inventing even as we're going. But so the relationship between BV, right, that's where you have an overgrowth of bad bacteria. And like you said, that's because your pH in your vaginal area would be high. And there's all these good reasons that that might happen to you, like we just discussed. And when you take the antibiotics to get rid of the bad bacteria, that's when the yeast will rise up. Because ironically, the bad bacteria makes the environment inhospitable for yeast to really multiply. So that you take you get rid of all that yeast and fungus, which is what happens with a yeast infection. It's and there's multiple kinds of fungus too, right? We always used to think, and the one the fungus that monostat deals with is the only fungus you would have. But there's actually several other kinds of candida that you can have that is not responsive to monostat, right? So there's some other treatments you can get for yeast infections, but but many, many, many women have recurrent yeast infections. And it's partly a pH thing, but it's also because many yeast medicines don't really eliminate the the all of the yeast, all of the the culprits, if you will. They just minimize it. But then if you have a lot of that growing in your gut, you're constantly having that move down the track when you excrete. And so both bacteria and yeast can get transferred from when you're when you're excreting, right? Those bacteria can climb back up through the vagina and really affect your health. So bacteria like strep and enterococcus and E. coli, we think of that as gut bacteria, but we find it more and more in vaginal health. And because a lot of doctors don't test for that, they'll just keep giving women the same antibiotics over and over again, thinking, oh, she just has these same, the same infection over and over, but we don't test. But it's not even the infection that would respond to that antibiotic. So it's crazy and ridiculous that I'm saying this to you in 2026, that women's health is one of the least well tested areas of any area of medicine. And that's why I invented a test. And you can get it on good clean clinical care. And it's a PCR test that a doctor can read so that you can really know what kind of yeast you have, what kind of bacteria is there, and then you can get the right treatment, which you know, so many women that are listening, it really affects your desire to want to have sex or your confidence in having sex when you are continuously misdiagnosed. When you kind of take your antibiotics, but then it doesn't, it gets rid of it for a minute, but you still don't really smell good because you haven't restored the good bacteria, and then two, three months later you have the infection again.

SPEAKER_01 22:03

Right. I think for partners who are listening, and of course, women, if you're constantly worried about your scent or your taste and you're self-conscious about it, that's going to affect how you show up in bed because you're not going to want someone to go down on you, or even if you're having sex, you're like, oh my gosh, what if this smells bad to the person? Or if every time you have sex afterwards, you experience itching or pain or a scent change. Well, it doesn't make sex fun. It's why would you want to engage in something like that? It's it has a huge effect.

SPEAKER_00 22:42

And like you said, I think also important to note that men and unbeknownst to them many times that they might have infections, even STDs, that they are not physically experiencing. So they don't know they have it. I maybe there's some crazy psychotic men that do know and they just are trying to hurt more women, but I'm excluding all those men. I'm just saying that frequently men might have, for instance, urea plasma. And that's because that bacteria is really small and hides in the folds of their urethra. And so they don't feel it. But when women have urea plasma, they really feel it. And it's a really hard infection to get rid of. And the same thing like BV germs, those also hide in the foreskin of men. And so hygiene, hygiene, hygiene. That's all I want to say. The sexiest sex is clean sex. So going into sex clean is really everything.

SPEAKER_01 23:42

I am I'm on board with that. Hygiene is so important. I've, you know, I used to run a lot. I don't run that much anymore. I'm I'm really in uh too long walks. But I had lovers who are like, oh, go running and get all sweaty and dirty and come have sex with me. And I'm like, mmm, mmm. I'm like, I keep things pristine, pristine.

SPEAKER_00 24:08

You can really create a lot of issues when you because back it's the same thing when you're sweating when you're running, right? Like the odors you have when you sweat, that is also a reflection of your bacteria on your skin. So you know how some men like they sweat and they smell really sexy, and other men sweat and they it's just go take a shower. That is all about like it's all about the foods they eat, what's happening in their gut, right? All that stuff comes out in all these ways, but pretty much everything about the body odor is about your bacteria.

SPEAKER_01 24:44

I want to talk about healthy vaginal secretions versus unhealthy. I oftentimes use that as a

Discharge Clues And A Care Protocol

SPEAKER_01 24:54

guide for like where is my balance at? I regularly check myself. I am very aware of my scent, my taste, and specifically the consistency of any secretions. Can you talk a little bit about what women should look for to know where they're at as far as vaginal health?

SPEAKER_00 25:16

So again, like a lot of people don't have a baseline. And so coming to your own baseline is really important because that's the thing that helps you know when you're off. But so, like I said, the baseline and when you're cycling, your your secretions are changing throughout the month, right? The first part of the month after your period's ending, your secretions are maybe a little bit thicker than they would be after when you ovulate and the end of the month. But again, my like back in the day before there were all these gas gadgets to track your cycle. I I used to take my own temperature and just keep track. But a really good lesson for any women, woman listening is just to actually pay attention and just for one month pay attention. How is your secretions? But generally, it doesn't have an offensive smell and it's more clear than it is like yellow or gray or white, right? The classic secretion when you have yeast, not only is your vulva really red and itchy, but you frequently will have a thick white discharge with yeast. But when you have bacterial vaginosis, depending on the the kind of bacteria overgrowth, it can be anything from like a grayish color to a yellowish color, sometimes even greenish, right? Those are colors that are associated more with bad bacteria. And so, but you'll definitely have a smell when you have those set those secretions too. So those things should be like basically your body telling you, oh, this is out of balance, right? There's something going on. And so we have these washes that are like more like aloe rinses called balance, that women are super dedicated to this. And I'm sorry I didn't send you any yet, but I'll send you some. And then we have these vaginal gels that are called restore, rehydrate, and they help to do that same thing that the wash does on the outside, on the inside. So bring your pH down to 3.7 to 4, and that's gonna just automatically help get rid of this the discharge and also the odor because you're creating an environment for healthy bacteria. And then we have this product called reset, which is actually a vaginal suppository. So we put the probiotic right in the vagina instead of making it go through the gut. And those three things together is our sort of standard protocol, and we've tested it in medical offices, and and there's research on our site, you can take a look at how it reduces all these symptoms because basically we're biomimicking you back to health by doing that. And when you and then you then then once you're in that healthy state, you'll see the difference between those other kinds of discharges and what your normal discharge is. But I feel like more women need to adopt a vaginal protocol the same way they do for their hair or their face, right? Think about all the product routines that we have to maintain our skin and our hair health, right? We don't just do it one time when we have an emergency, we do it all the time because we want to be well, we want our skin to look a certain way. Well, I met this one woman who said, Well, your vagina is your other face. And so you so you take care of that in the same way that you would take care of your skin, right? And you and you give it these products to help maintain this balance. Because if you're in those groups of women that never have the right bacteria or have had a lot of antibiotics over their life and trying to come back to the right bacteria, by supporting it with these products I mentioned, you can biomimic your way into health.

SPEAKER_01 29:13

Like, yeah, it's interesting because it's interesting because maybe I want to say the last five years, there really weren't douches are bad, guys. We all know just bad. But in the last five years that I know of, we have started to have typically woman-owned companies creating skincare for your vulva and and vagina. And it is so obvious to me that this is something that you should be doing. And and the beauty of creating a skincare routine for your vulva and your vagina is that it also gives you an opportunity to get to know that area of your body, which is really important. Something else I meant to mention, and I should have earlier in this episode, is that the other thing that I think makes vaginal care super important is especially for women who have had trauma, whether it's sexual assault or trauma from birth or whatever, experiencing things like a yeast infection or BV, which are all these are all very normal things to happen. But those symptoms, the itching, the pain, can really re-trigger trauma from sexual assaults or or again, sometimes trauma can happen in birth or from painful sex. These can be strong, strong triggers for women and make them feel all sorts of way about themselves and send them down a rabbit hole. So this is another reason why it's important for both women and their partners to be aware of the vagina, the vulva, what it takes to care for it, being responsible for it. If you are a partner with a woman, it's your responsibility also to take care of her, her vaginal health, because presumably, if you are a penis on or a man, you're going to be putting sperm in there, which can fuck us up. I had a partner who every time I had sex with him without a condom, I would get an yeast infection. It ended our relationship.

SPEAKER_00 31:33

So I 100% agree with you that having an active, healthy relationship with your vaginal health and your vulvar health actually just makes you feel better every day, right? You have more nerve endings in that part of your body than any other part of your actually, the vulva and the clitoris and the clitoral organ system has 10,000 nerve endings. That's why when you have yeast or other kinds of infections, it's it's like basically that's all you can do, right? It takes up all of your attention because you have so many nerve endings there. And and yes, I really do appreciate that you bring up this trauma because 50% of women, and that's probably conservative, have had erotic injuries either in high school or college or at some point, and that gets embedded in your vaginal microbiome health. And so ironically, it's when you become aroused that that irritation starts to rise up. We do this study, we're doing this study in the University of Nebraska, and without really even trying to call for women, just trying to understand how vaginal stability, microbiome stability affects your desire, your your capacity for arousal. And so when your microbiome is really like out of balance, it's not sending this message to your brain about arousal. So not that surprising. And kind of in the same way the gut brain access, right? The vaginal brain also has access to your arousal. And so another reason that you really want to be in balance is because that's when you are most aroused, right? You're most because you're not worried about all these things, but it's also biological. I do feel like it's important to make a note that not all vaginal regimes are made equal. We do this thing called biomatch. And what's really important to know is that our products are isoasic. And what that means is that it matches what's already there.

Lube Labels That Can Disrupt pH

SPEAKER_00 33:37

So we're not going to be taking the making you your vaginal epithelium shed by pulling all the water out of it. And that's what products like KY, or actually, without even mentioning any brands, I can just say that if your products have propylene glycol or polyethylene glycol or any glycol, those products are so much heavier, those chemicals are so much heavier than your own natural secretions and even sperm, that basically what it does is completely turn your vaginal microbiome upside down. And it causes all this water to be shed out of the cells. And basically you lose the cells at the top layer of your epithelium, which just makes you more susceptible to infections, all kinds of infections. So, really, the products you want to use should be isoosic. And and products, I think hopefully someday they'll make a law that every product has to show its osmolality, which is a fancy word for osmosis, but it basically says, is this product balanced to my own natural environment? And most products are not. So when you use those products, it actually exacerbates the problem. Instead of actually improving it, you can't be moisturizing and be hyperosmolar. You you have to be isoasmatic to bring moisture, you have to be isoasmatic to create balance. So I just want people to know that they could very well be using products that are doing the opposite of what they feel like they bought that product for. And so, yeah, so I think it's really important that people know that. And in fact, medicines that are prescribed to women for infections or pain relief or steroids, all kinds of things, are frequently made in a base that also disrupts the vaginal microbiome. So even medicine has not really caught up to what we need our products to do for us, which is to protect our vaginal microbiome so that so that when when that is stable and maintained, then a lot of symptomology will just go away by itself.

SPEAKER_01 35:56

Well, early on in this interview, you brought up wanting to talk more about the clitoral organ. Yes. Let's

The Clitoral Organ System Explained

SPEAKER_01 36:06

set aside some time to do that now so that my listeners can really get a full understanding of what that looks like now that you understand the vulva and the vagina.

SPEAKER_00 36:17

Yeah, I actually I love talking about the clitoris because it's such an exciting organ system. There isn't anything in the male body that comes close. When babies are being conceived, it's in the first month that female and male separate. And so the male penile organ system, which has been understood for decades, is actually a corollary to the female, which is actually the clitoral organ system. So honestly, the women's clitoral system is much more complex and with, like I said, way more nerve endings than the male penile system, which I think they're loath to understand that. But it's built actually for extended sexual pleasure, and also it helps you understand why we don't just turn on like a man and can get there in a second, right? So the glands, which is the the thing that you can see that's exposed on the outside, it's in and of itself has a ton of nerve endings, but it has these legs that stretch into the walls of the vagina. And when you orgasm externally with the clitoris, it basically causes this rush of blood up to up into the legs, which relaxes the vaginal opening to really receive penetration, and it meets at the back of the vagina in what is really truly a G spot. That's what we call it. So that anatomy is real. But many women, and I myself didn't know about this till I was 40 years old. So I would just always be like, why am I having these feelings inside when I would orgasm and I never knew? And I think a lot of listeners probably don't really understand the complexity and the wonder of this organ. And honestly, it was only four months ago in March of this year that there was a true full study of the the enormity of this organ system. And there's a lot of research I've been reading lately about clitoral, like both the clitoral physiology, but also just the function of that kind of orgasm. I and I didn't have this kind of sex when I was young, I because I like I said, I didn't even know I didn't understand even what my body could do when I was young. But now I can have orgasms that go for 40 minutes. And and the older you get, actually, the more capable you become in that way, partly through understanding, but partly because that organ system is designed for extended pleasure. So you ask yourself, why were we given this pleasure organ, right? And turns out that that that maybe it has a lot to do with resetting our nervous system because an orgasm is especially a shared orgasm, is such a lovely thing, but even an orgasm solo with whatever toys or whatever you want to use. And I'm a big, big believer in all women having access to their own pleasure, because then they can become much more active part participants with a partner, right? They know already what feels good. Nobody's giving them that orgasm, they're sharing it with whoever they want in an empowered way. But if somebody accidentally comes upon your orgasm and you think the only way you can ever have it is this guy doing whatever that was he did, you'll be frustrated a lot of days because he might not be able to recreate that exact thing. And so knowing your own pathways to pleasure and even short of orgasm, what I've just recently learned is that just touching yourself and being aroused calms your nervous system. Like all of this pleasure organ is really designed, and it's the only mechanism in life that actually resets your emotional, psychological, physical, and mental fields into a place where your nervous system really settles into a place of really knowing yourself.

SPEAKER_01 40:36

Well, this is where I'm gonna plug my 365 days of pleasure orgasms, uh journey that I'm taking my listeners on in 2022. I gave myself one orgasm a day for 365 days. And during that process, I learned a lot. As you can imagine, you cannot not learn a lot. And this year I've been taking my specifically my Instagram followers. I post a video there once a week that gives you a daily practice for pleasure and helps you learn your own pathways to pleasure because of all of the benefits that you receive, obviously, the nervous system reset and then also figuring out the different types of orgasms because as having this clitoral structure inside your body offers different erogenous zones that are going to give you different types of orgasms. I have certainly experienced the half-hour, 40-minute orgasm. I wanted to, while we're talking about that, so so this is my plug.

SPEAKER_00 41:39

Go to that's so incredible, Annette. Imagine if people really had access to this part of themselves, this knowledge of themselves, and they spent more of their time and attention trying to do this, how it would change their relationships to themselves, to everyone, their partners, to their work, right? I just really always try to think if people had more orgasms, there'd be way less violence in the world. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 42:07

I I'm on board with you 100%. Orgasm could save the world. And and obviously, I think this is just key to women's health and happiness. So that's my plug. If you aren't following me, go to my Instagram page where you can find me there at Annette Benedetti. You can also go to my website, talksexwithanette.com, and find through the 365 days journey there. But for now, we have come to that point in this recording or in this episode where I would love for you to give my listeners three takeaways, regardless of

Three Takeaways And A Simple Regimen

SPEAKER_01 42:40

whether it's a woman or their partner. What are the things they can start doing tonight to get familiar with themselves, get comfortable, and bring more pleasure into the bedroom?

SPEAKER_00 42:53

So I would say for sure, anatomy, right? Start to explore your anatomy and don't be ashamed to do research, do personal research and even research online. Follow Annette. She's gonna show you in 365 days these different techniques that you can find your own pleasure. Never actually expect someone to get that's something you give to somebody. It's not somebody that gives that to you. I think that's number one. And number two is really give up shame about your vaginal health and your vulvar health and think about the times where it's not right as an imbalance and think about how you want to create a uh a regime, right? A protocol that you that you can turn to whenever you need it to help bring yourself back into balance. Because if your vagina and your vaginal and your vulgar health are in balance, you're gonna feel way more open to arousal in every way. And then the third thing I would say is how we think is the most powerful part of what we how we live. And so really think about how you think about yourself as an erotic human being and give yourself permission to explore your fantasy life, to be more curious about different kinds of things that you might never have done before, to to embrace even the bad days, right? And say, okay, I'm learning something from this day. So I think how we think really and how that's how we love ourselves, truthfully. And it enables us to have access to and receive love from other people.

SPEAKER_01 44:35

And really quick before we go, a cheat sheet for what would a healthy vaginal regime look like?

SPEAKER_00 44:42

Well, so I'm biased because I started this company in my kitchen, but basically, you want to use a wash that that's not harmful, that doesn't have too many saponifiers and doesn't have fragrance in it. So I'm very pro, I use balance everywhere I go all the time. So if you haven't tried it, we're gonna give you coupon codes so any of your listeners can go on and they can go either to Good Clean Love or Good Clean Clinical Care and get that discount with you, Annette. And then a vaginal gel is always helpful to keep your moisture and to balance your pH inside. Mostly that's what it's for. It's to reduce your pH if you tend to have your pH going up. So really everything about this regime is about reducing your pH so healthy bacteria can be there. And by having healthy bacteria, you'll have less symptoms and you'll feel sexier and you'll have a better smell. And the last part of that is this reset that we talked about. So using that regime, I pretty much promise anybody listening is gonna feel better.

SPEAKER_01 45:49

Excellent. Now, can you tell my listeners everywhere that they can find you?

SPEAKER_00 45:54

So I have a TikTok videos, Wendy at Wendy Stragar. There's actually my most popular video is if I eat pineapple, will change my scent. So that's funny because

Where To Find Wendy And Wrap Up

SPEAKER_00 46:04

we've been talking about that. And no, it won't. You should actually go with that regime instead. But also on Instagram and and Substack. I just started a Substack, so would love to see you there. And and of course, at Good Clean Love and Good Clean Clinical Care, we have tons of education information there. So please feel free to reach out anywhere. Wendy at goodcleanlove.com.

SPEAKER_01 46:30

Thank you so much, Wendy. Listen, folks, it's very important for women to get to know their own body first. And that means getting comfortable with your anatomy, exploring it, and that includes scent, smell, taste, and then of course sharing that with your partner. And partners out there have a responsibility to understand the anatomy of their partners, right? And and doing that and creating a regimen of skincare, vaginal health care is key to creating bedroom life that is free, open to exploring fantasies and healthy for both of you. This is setting the foundation for every. Thank you, Wendy, for giving us sort of those steps to take to set that foundation so that everything else in the bedroom can be wild free and exciting, as exciting as you want it to be. Let me know how it goes. Give this a try. If you listeners, if you have any questions, you know, you can email into me at Annette at TalkSex with Annette, and we will do our best to get those answers to you. Thank you again for joining me, Wendy.

SPEAKER_00 47:45

It was a really pleasure, and and I am super excited to stay in touch with you, Annette. And thanks for having me.

SPEAKER_01 47:52

Yeah, thank you so much for joining me. Until next time, listeners, I'll see you in the locker room. Cheers.