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Further Your Lifestyle
Further Your Lifestyle
EP. 230 - If You're Ignoring THIS ONE THING it is Holding You Back! | Further Your Lifestyle Podcast
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| Further Your Lifestyle Podcast | EP 230
In Episode 230 of the Further Your Lifestyle Podcast, Chris dives deep into the concept of internal growth and how our inner beliefs and stories can be the real barriers to our progress. Chris discusses the importance of self-reflection, overcoming learned helplessness, and the need to rewire our internal dialogue to achieve true transformation. He shares personal anecdotes and offers prompts to help listeners identify and challenge their limiting beliefs. Tune in to explore how discomfort and fear can be turned into tools for growth and how working on your 'inner game' can lead to significant external results.
00:00 Welcome to the Further Your Lifestyle Podcast
00:51 The Importance of Internal Growth
02:11 Chasing External Validation
03:37 The Invisible Cage of Limiting Beliefs
04:47 Overcoming Learned Helplessness
05:23 Rewriting Your Internal Script
06:55 Facing Discomfort for Growth
09:48 Prompts for Self-Reflection
10:46 Conclusion and Upcoming Topics
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Yo yo yo. Welcome back to the Further your Lifestyle podcast conversations on lifestyle passions and hustles. My name's Chris, I am your host and I'm super excited to be back here having the conversation with you Episode 230 today. And we're continuing to talk about topics which I feel like continue to come up simply because they're either things that I've been experiencing or challenging myself on in the recent week or two weeks, or it's just things that have popped up, that I've seen through chatter or through comments, or just kind of trends in terms of just, I guess, through the demographics of the people that I interact with, whether it be through YouTube, whether it be through business, whether it's through this podcast or just in general, you know, when hanging out in discords and things like that.
Speaker 1:And today's is coming down to a topic which is, you know, one of my regular ones, I think, and talking about how internal growth sorry that it's the internal growth that we're ignoring. That is actually probably the things that we need to be working on, and what this means is essentially what if the biggest limits on our growth isn't out here, isn't around outside or external, but it's all internal, it's all in here, it's all inside our minds and in our heart and also talking about the whole, I guess, the predicament around what if all the stories and all the things that we believe about ourselves are the real walls that are holding us back. Now, this is deep and this is rough, and sometimes, hearing these things, we can get defensive, simply because someone else is telling you what's wrong with you and you don't agree with that. But it's these things that we need to be thinking about with an open mind, being willing to think hey, hang on, maybe there's some things here that I need to do better, maybe there's some things here that I need to fix. And hey, I'll be the first to put my hand up and say that there's a lot of things internally here that I need to work on and we can't keep blaming the external things going on around us. So why does this matter? And before we get into it, I just wanted to kind of give you guys some context. And, of course, if you enjoy these episodes, make sure you do hit like subscribe and you can leave a comment as well and continue the conversation. Otherwise, do share it with someone else if you think this whole conversation needs to be heard by someone else.
Speaker 1:But why does all this matter I mean, I think most people we tend to chase external validation through more tools, through more tactics, more followers or more revenue. It's all vanity, essentially, but you know there's reason with that, there's. You know we chase it because it makes us feel good. Right, it's nice. But what about the internal growth?
Speaker 1:That's where things get uncomfortable, and we've spoken about this. It's the invisible work. It's the stuff that we have to do deep down that no one else sees, and that's where the real transformation is key. That's where we actually start to see some results when we start to work on what's going on in here. And what's going on in here, the truth is, you're not stuck because you don't have the right strategy. Now, we spoke about this weeks ago, talking about you know, the thing that's stunting your growth is actually you not being willing to get uncomfortable and I'm dealing with this at the moment and I'll talk about that later. But you're stuck because you haven't rewired the beliefs that got you here in the first place. And you know, if we continue to do what we've always done, we'll always get what we've always gotten. It's simple as that. Now we're going to roll the intro, we're going to get into it, but that's what we're talking about today, so buckle up, we're going to explore some legwork on. Let's roll the intro.
Speaker 1:So I think the first key concept that I want to explore and I've got my notes in front of me is the invisible cage that we tend to build. Now we live inside these stories we tell ourselves. It's stuff that we've told ourselves ever since we were kids depending on your age, obviously, our entire lives, potentially as well and these are known as limiting beliefs, beliefs that are often dressed up as truths, but they're just well-rehearsed scripts of like no, that's okay. Oh, this is okay. Oh, you justify it because of this. Oh, what I've always done that? Oh, someone has always explained to me that this is the way we do it.
Speaker 1:Just because that's the way you've been taught doesn't mean that's the way it should be, simply because sometimes we do live under a rock or we box ourselves into this narrative of what we think should be right. And that's why it's really important that when people do have conversations with you, that you look at it from an open perspective, minded perspective, because everyone has their own different, built in worlds and cages, and sometimes it can be hard for them to help. You see what they're trying to explain, but then it works both ways. So we just need to think and listen and hear with love. The other thing is is like there seems to be this learned helplessness, right, learned helplessness. So repeated failure teaches you to stop trying, even when success becomes possible. And this is something that I've been dealing with running, actually, I've been scared to get back out there, try something different, get back on my horse. And when I say get back on my horse, I mean get back out there and run, because I'm scared that I'm going to get the problems that I had previously, which was a big injury and that's been scary, right. But when we defeat that, we can actually overcome that and then we can start to really see the growth that really, really matters. And this is where rewriting the script comes in.
Speaker 1:Your brain is like plastic, right, it can change, and so can your story, right. If you put fire to plastic, it starts to melt. If you do other things to plastic, it changes its form. We need to do that with our minds. We need to change and redevelop, reform, recreate, transform our minds and our perspectives. It's such a cliche. We can say I'm not good enough.
Speaker 1:But who said this? Based on what? Why are we saying this about ourselves? All right, and that becomes because of this is perceived perspective of ourselves and what we think the other you know, everyone else or the world is interpreting us as. But it's actually just a vision of ourselves. We're just not happy with ourselves. But we're blaming other people thinking they're not happy with us, when really it's our own issues that we need to deal with.
Speaker 1:So your internal dialogue becomes your external results. We set those external results. We set that external pressure. We have this misconceived idea that these people have these ideas about us when really they don't care about you. They've got their own things to worry about. So it really does come to fixing our insides, our internal dialogue Excuse me, you're on there internal dialogue in our head and in our heart. So how do we do this? Or what do we talk about here? So external growth without internal upgrades, such as managing burnout, stagnation and imposter syndrome, that is when we're going to see growth. So you can only see external growth without burnout, stagnation and imposter syndrome. That's a whole bunch of things that we have to deal with. That's a lot to deal with. It's not that easy and when we look at every level of success. It demands a new version of yourself. It requires you to step it up, and that's scary.
Speaker 1:In the last week I've had two meetings with some really you know people that I never thought that I would have interviews with or not interviews, just conversations with two CEOs, and one was just I was just a meet and greet. The other one is actually for a business proposition and, you know, in parallel to this I was working out getting my biggest order of 5,000 pieces of clothing, getting that delivered to the warehouse. It was about 10, 11 pallets of clothing. That was all very exciting, nerve-wracking, overwhelming, but it actually went smooth as possible. So much clothing, so much that I've never even had this much ever on hand before and that seems like a big deal.
Speaker 1:But then I'm working on this new pitch with a new it's actually it's an existing customer client, but it's a new opportunity and there's a whole bunch of things that I'm going to have to do which is making me uncomfortable because I've never had to do it before and I'm trying to make it perfect, I'm trying to make it great and I really want to make sure I add the value. But all these different things, but then in your mind you're thinking oh, I'm not good enough, how's this going to work? What if we fail? All these different things, and this creates us to force ourselves to have to get a little bit uncomfortable in order to grow. And that's what I'm dealing with.
Speaker 1:And it's scary, and that's the idea, because becoming a better version of yourself it's unknown. We don't know what that better version looks like. We know what we want, but we don't know what that's going to feel like and be like. So you want more. Well, you've got to become more, and that's what I'm working through and that's why I think this is such a relevant conversation.
Speaker 1:So discomfort equals data. Growth doesn't feel good. It feels like doubt, it feels like you're stretching, it feels like uncertainty, it feels like you're looking foolish and it feels like you don't know what you're doing. But that doesn't mean you stop. It means you dig in and it means that you take it on. So how can we reframe this? Your limits are learned. You can. You can unlearn them right. It's just about building habits. It's being habitual, finding consistency through routine, of creating something that's of a better result or outcome for yourself.
Speaker 1:Fear is feedback, not a stop sign If you feel some fear, make sure you use that as your advantage. It's like, okay, well, why? What are you scared about? Is it this? Okay? So how do we mitigate that and use that as your advantage? You grow into your future self one stretch at a time. It's literally like one step at a time.
Speaker 1:A child couldn't just all of a sudden become the fastest human being. They've had to take their first steps. They've had to learn to walk, they've had to learn to run, they've had to learn to jog, They've had to learn to crawl All these different things. It takes time, one step at a time. So here are some prompts to really get you thinking.
Speaker 1:Number one is what story have you outgrown, but are you still repeating? What are the things that you know you should no longer be doing? Or you're better than this now, but why are you still repeating it? What belief are you holding that no longer serves you? There's been a lot that I've had to learn to let go of in building out my business and doing this podcast. I've had to learn to get rid of the old ways and bring in the new ways of thinking, new ways of a better version of myself, going through the doubt the struggles, the constant, I guess, disapprovement of society, of not following the norm. It's been rough, but you get through it and you come out stronger on the other end. Where are you blaming externals for something that starts within? What is something that you're blaming on external forces when really you just need to do some stuff internally? So I guess you know.
Speaker 1:Just to finish it up, it's a short and sweet episode. You can't scale what's really sorry. Let me say this again you can't scale what's real unless you're willing to upgrade who's behind the wheel. You've got to work on your inner game. You've got to work on your inner game and the outer game will follow. If you become a better driver, you're going to get to your destination probably safer, smarter and maybe even faster. Right, but it's not about speed, it's not about rushing, it's about quality and it's about output and it's about consistency and it's about being able to be confident, be happy and be satisfied with what you've achieved.
Speaker 1:Right Now it's very easy to put the blame on other people, because we don't want to have to deal with the crap we have inside, but when you work on your inner game, your outer game will follow. It's kind of like you know what you put in is what you get out, and that's why it's really important that you're putting things into your life that's challenged you to become a better version of yourself. That's why we have the podcast Further your Lifestyle. And you weren't born limited. You were taught to believe you were. Everything you know is from a series of people helping, sharing, teaching you know, giving you examples. It's from what you've gone down a rabbit path you know, rabbit hole on, and there's no right or wrong to this.
Speaker 1:But what I'm saying is you just got to look at everything a bit more openly, be willing to understand, like, okay, why have I been doing it this way? Is there some another way that we can do this, opposed to just the way that everyone else has said? It has to be done this way? Now, I'm not saying to rise up as a rebellion or anything like that, but it does. You need to think about your internal perspective and think about, well, where did this even come from? And then start to think well, if I was starting fresh, would this look any different to me? That's where I'm going to leave it.
Speaker 1:Folks Really appreciate you being here If you did have any questions. If you want to continue the conversation, more than happy to do so. We're going to be back next week and we're going to be talking about actually, this is a fun one. Next week we're talking about 10 lessons from someone who's turned 60 and some of their perspectives, some of the learnings from that, and we're going to just go through it quickly. It'll be a quick and short, sharp one again next week as well, but I think it's really important to just get these different perspectives that we can learn and chat about together. So if you do want to continue the conversation, jump down into the comments. Otherwise, you have a wonderful day, cheers.
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