344 ~ How To REALLY Change Your Life

Hello Magical Human & welcome back to Madison Mindset the Podcast 🧚🏼

In this episode, we explore how lasting change starts with awareness, kindness, and a calmer nervous system, not force or all-or-nothing pushes. Learn a four-part framework—mindset, body, lifestyle, and spirit—to assist you in creating real change.

If you're ready to go from 'Anxiety to Abundance', I invite you to book a free 30-minute coaching call with me below 🪞

You are the change

Love,

Madison Mindset x

Chapters

• 0:20 Welcome And Grounding Breath
• 2:25 Why Forcing Change Backfires
• 3:07 From Anxiety To Allowing
• 4:14 Self-Awareness As The Starting Point
• 6:28 You Can’t Change With The Same Mindset
• 9:16 Four Common Mistakes In Change
• 12:55 Transform Through Mindset
• 14:32 Transform Through Body
• 16:02 Design A Supportive Lifestyle
• 17:00 Align Spirit And Intention
• 18:05 Patience, Reflection, And New Beliefs
• 18:29 Closing And Coaching Invitation

Transcript

SPEAKER_01: 0:20

Hello, magical human, and welcome back to Madison Mindset the podcast. My name is Madison. I'm the host of the podcast, and I am a yoga teacher, a mindset coach, and absolute lover of all things spirituality and self-growth. In this episode today, we are going to go over how you can really change your life. We've all been there where you want to make a change. Sometimes it's on Monday, sometimes it's you know the start of the year, next month, whatever it is, we decide that's it, I'm gonna change, fill in the blank. You try and you fail. You give it a go and it doesn't work out. And then you give up and then you try again later. If you've ever been here before where you're going, I just want to change my life, I want to change how much money I have, I want to change my relationships, I want to change the way I respond to myself, the way I interpret and respond to life. I want to change a certain habit, whatever it is, if you've struggled with that before and you're looking for a way to really change your life, this is the episode for you. Stay tuned. I want to begin with intention and invite you to take a few grounding breaths with me. If you're driving, obviously, keep your eyes on the road. Do these breaths in your own time. But if you're with me, if you can take a moment to be still and even close your eyes, I invite you to do that now. Take a deep breath in through your nose. Long breath out through the nose. Pause at the bottom. Long breath in through the nose. Even longer breath out through the nose. Relax the shoulders.

SPEAKER_00: 2:01

Pause. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Pause.

SPEAKER_01: 2:22

Arriving back in the space together. One of the biggest mistakes we make when we're looking to change our life is coming from a place of force, and I must do this, and it's all or nothing, and we try and change everything at once. That kind of force and control is not going to get you anywhere. True change in your life starts with awareness and kindness towards yourself, towards everyone involved in the situation and patience. If you can come from that angle, instead of a forceful one, I must change this or I'm useless or I'm that, instead of all of that, you just come with love, you come with intention, you come with awareness, and you find that you can change pretty much everything about your life. When I set out on my journey to really transform my anxiety, for those of you who've been listening for a long time, you know that all of this, this journey of mine, has started from experiencing deep anxiety. When I set out to change that, I found that I made more progress when I was unattached. When I was frustrated, angry, trying to push anxiety away, trying to force it away, thinking, you know, this has to fix it, you know, this should be gone by now. What am I doing? When I came from that place, I just ended up with more anxiety. It was just throwing logs on the fire. When I learned to take a step back and allow anxiety to be without trying to force it away and truly letting go of it, that's when I started to make big change. So with whatever you're looking to change in your life, if you're going from a place of resistance, control, this is wrong, I don't want to, I don't want to have this thing anymore, I don't want to deal with this. The more you push, the more that thing will resist you and push right back. Whereas when you learn to let go and allow things to be, you find you make a lot more progress with that kind of kindness and patience. Change begins with self-awareness. How can you change something if you don't know what's going on? Being aware of why something is happening, how it started, when it comes up, that will give you the most power in terms of changing your life. For example, if you're looking to change a habit that you have where you're just snoozing the alarm, first we need to notice, be aware, is that a problem for you? Because for some people it's not a problem, that's fine. But if you're not enjoying that, self-awareness would allow you to look at that and go, hmm, what is this actually costing me? When I snooze my alarm, how do I feel for the rest of the day? How does that change the attitude and the mood for the rest of my day? How does that feel? What is it costing me? So you become aware of what's going on. Do you remember the first time you snoozed your alarm? Why did you snooze it? A lot of the time, this is when you really lose the zest for life, when you feel quite low on the lower end of life. It's hard to jump out of bed with a positive attitude, with a smile on your face. You end up snoozing the alarm because you would rather lie in bed and sleep instead of enjoy the day. So look at why you might do that. Also look at things like am I getting enough sleep? If you're going to bed at 11 p.m. and wanting to get up at 5 a.m. for the gym, maybe you're not getting enough sleep. You need to get to bed a couple hours earlier. So all of that self-assessment, self-awareness is going to give you an understanding of what needs to change, why it needs to change, and why it's there in the first place. This self-awareness is something that is also taught in the eight limbs of yoga, in the niyamas, swadiya, self-study. Actually taking the time to learn what's going on for you, what are your habits, what's the subconscious behavior that you have, how are you operating? What is your mindset? You know, and that also goes into, you know, reading different books, listening to different podcasts. If you're listening to this, well done. This is a form of self-study. That's great self-inquiry. You know, actually learning about yourself, not from a place of judgment or frustration or annoyance, but from a place of curiosity and openness that is really powerful when it comes to changing our life. Now, Einstein pointed to the exact quote that I'm going to say, but it is also said that Dr. Joe Dispenser said this as well, which I'm not surprised. So they both have very similar ideas over this and have mentioned similar things. There are many other philosophers and scientists that will say the same thing. But the words I really want you to hear and use to help you understand how change is created are these words. You can't change your life from the same mindset that created it. You can't change your life from the same mindset that created it. Okay. You cannot expect to change your life if you're not going to change yourself, your inner world. You cannot change anything about the outside, including your own physical health. You cannot change anything about the outside of your life without changing yourself first. Because if you could, you would already have that. Okay, you your life is a manifestation of your inner world. So what you've got right now is a result of your current mindset. If you're not happy with some part of that, then there's some part of your mindset that needs to shift. So if you're not happy with snoozing the alarm and you want to be up at 5 a.m., do you believe that you're a 5 a.m. kind of person? Do you believe that you give yourself enough sleep? Do you have enough intention to get up? Do you have a strong why? Do you know how that's gonna benefit you and how you're gonna do it? Do you have your method? Do you have your clothes already sorted out, your shoes right there, everything's ready to go? Are you gonna get yourself to bed at 9 p.m.? Are you gonna stay off your phone so you can sleep well? You have to change your mind because at the moment, if you're someone who snoozes the alarm all the time, then there's some part of your identity, your mindset that is I snooze my alarm. I'm lazy, I can't be bothered, I'd rather sleep, I'm always tired. Those kind of thoughts come from a mindset. So if you're only observing, I only you know snooze my alarm, I find it really hard to stop. Look at your inner world. Do you believe you can? Do you believe you can get up? Do you know what you're gonna do when you get up? It's one thing to stand up out of bed. What are you gonna do next? Have a plan, right? Have a mindset that's strong in terms of that. So if you change your mindset, then your life will change. And this is what I've been teaching for years. You know, it's you need to evolve the way you're thinking about life and about yourself. And when you do that, everything else changes. The inner world will change the outer world if you evolve it. So this is a really important point. If you are looking to change your life, you've got to become a new person because the person you are right now already has the life that you have right now. Why would that ever change? Unless you evolve the inside. Here are four common mistakes that people make when trying to change their life. The first one, trying to change everything at once. One thing at a time, one step at a time. As I just mentioned, if you change part of your inner world, your outer world will change to reflect that. And it almost happens all at once. But if there's a specific habit, such as snoozing your alarm or eating, you know, sugary foods, or going to the gym, whatever it is, don't try and do them all at once. That's too much. It's too much change. All right. One thing at a time, pick the priority and go with that. Otherwise, you're setting yourself up for failure. Two, relying only on discipline and motivation. You've got to take action. You've got to stand up and make the choice. Stop waiting to feel like you feel like changing that habit. And stop waiting. Stop waiting for motivation to find you. Motivation doesn't come to you. You've got to go to motivation. You've got to create it yourself. Stand up and take the action. Do the things that you need to do. If you're just going to rely on discipline and oh, I feel like it one day, if you're just going to rely on that, nothing's ever going to change. Your comfort zone is there for a reason. The way you're operating, your current way of functioning in this world is there. It is a habit, it is a state of being. In order to change that, you've got to put some effort in. So you've got to make the decision to do the things that are going to change your life and to choose to do them even if you don't feel like it. Makes a huge difference. Three, not involving the nervous system. Now, your nervous system is all about keeping you balanced, keeping you safe. If you're trying to change things, you're going outside your comfort zone, you're trying to change it all at once, and it becomes a stressful thing, then you're only draining your health. You're draining your immune system, you're draining your nervous system, and that kind of thing can lead to burnout and stress and anxiety. So we want to involve the nervous system in any change. So we want to practice relaxation. We want to practice letting go. We want to practice moments of peace and harmony. And we want to allow our nervous system time to balance, especially if you're in a process of changing and evolving, which is constant in this life, you know, especially if you're embracing this work. So we want to involve the nervous system in that as much as possible. Your nervous system, you could say, is like the car. You're sitting in the car trying to change your regular route, the way you want to go. You've got to make sure you take care of the car. Make sure you give it oil, change the tires, you know, assess the vehicle that you're in because you've got to take care of these things, otherwise they fall apart, they break down. So your nervous system should be acknowledged and cared for along the journey. And the final mistake is expecting it all to happen at once. I'm definitely guilty of this. I've done this so many times. Why isn't it just fixed right now? We all want things instantly, that instant gratification. We all want things to be perfect right now. I want it now. That's just not reality. Nothing happens immediately. You cannot expect things to happen immediately. You've got to give it some time. You know, it takes a long time to change a habit. You know, it takes a while. You've got to give yourself time, you've got to give your nervous system time, you've got to give the new routine time. So you've got to commit to showing up, doing the work until it starts to feel easy. Keep in mind that you need to feel safe in order for transformation to occur. So making sure that you're prioritizing your meditation, your breath, your calming practices, your relaxation, these are really important parts of your transformation. They are literally you taking care of the soil so that the seed can grow. So do not get lost in go, go, go, go, go. You've got to have time to relax and to recover as well. Here are four things you can do to help your transformation and to truly change your life in different areas. We've got our mindset, our body, our lifestyle, and spirit. Let's go into these four now. Number one, mindset. It begins with awareness. What are you ready to change? And why? And how are you going to do that? This is a good time to grab your journal and write down the affirmation. I allow myself to change. Not because you are lacking or because you're not good enough as you are, not from that place. You are going to allow yourself to evolve and grow in the direction that you want to go in, towards health, towards money, towards your dreams, towards love, whatever it is. You allow yourself to change from a place of love and kindness, not frustration or impatience. Write down one thing that you would like to change and what you'd like to bring some awareness on. Just like shining a torch towards something in the darkness. Why do you want to change that? Why is it a priority for you? Why is it important that you change it? What will that change? What are you going to change it to and how? What's your first step? Can you do that one step this week? Let's get the ball rolling. Change for the body. Movement creates momentum. Make sure you are moving your body. This is a powerful tool. If you're looking to transform your life, why don't you transform your body along with it? Get up, do some walking, go to yoga, go and do some whatever the movement is, move your body, dance. All of that movement creates oomph. It helps you elevate your mood and step into a more positive, happier version of yourself, which is exactly what you need in order to evolve and change. Why not actually start with moving your body? Especially if you've got a big action to take or something you want to take on. Start the success ball rolling by moving your body. As you move, you could be affirming to yourself that this is signaling your change, your growth, your evolution. It's helping you get the momentum in order to change what's happening in your life. Let's chat about ways you can change your lifestyle in order to really help you change your life. Once you've identified this is the thing I want to change, this is why, this is what's going to happen. You've got to design a lifestyle that's really easy for you to do that. For example, if you do not want to be watching TV, if you want to get, you don't want to stop watching TV altogether, or you want to stop scrolling on Instagram. Create an environment that is easy for you to do that. As in hide the TV remote, or better yet, put the TV in a cupboard so it's out of the way so you can't see it. Put it in a back room. If the TV is sitting right there, the temptation is very strong. Delete Instagram off your phone. Don't have it there. If it's sitting right there, it's already logged in, so easy just to click on that app and go straight back to scrolling in about two seconds. If you want to get up and go for a run in the morning or go to yoga, have your yoga mat already there. Have your clothes already picked out, decided, and sitting right next to your bed. Make things easy for yourself. If you don't want to be eating sugary foods, don't buy them. Get them out of the house so that it's not so easy if you just reach for a chocolate bar. So all these little micro changes seem like nothing, but they can be a big difference for you. So think about the thing that you've written down, you know, the big thing that you want to change right now, the priority, the one thing, how can you design your lifestyle around supporting that? Is it alarm on your phone to tell you to go to bed? What changes can you make in order to help you make that change? And finally, spirit. This is where you get your spirit self on board. Okay, your soul, alignment with life. You've decided this is what I want to change, these are the physical things I'm gonna do to make sure that that really helped that I'm really supporting myself in making those changes. Now we are looking at aligning with intention. The word for this in yoga is sankalpa. This means intention, pure intention, high intention. So you might take some time to do some meditation, maybe with the hands on your heart space with every intention to bring love, ease, and change into your life. You might align yourself with a ritual. Maybe you draw an oracle card, maybe you light a candle signaling burning away the old or letting go. Maybe you listen to water or go and sit by a waterfall as you watch all those old parts of yourself fall away and drift away in the stream. What can you do as a ritual or a prayer that can signal the spirit self on board? On board with this goal, with this change. Give yourself time with all of these. Be patient, understand that it takes time, and continuously reflect on your awareness, especially as new beliefs or new values pop up that make it hard for you to make that change. Write them down, decide where they've come from. How can you evolve? What's the new thought? What is the new thought that would support you in achieving your goal and really changing your life? Thank you so much, Magical Human, for being here and for enjoying this practice with me. I hope you enjoyed the episode. Please share it with someone that you love, someone that you think would benefit from this episode, and share it on your Instagram stories and tag me at Madison underscore mindset. I invite you to book a free 30-minute coaching call with me where we're going to chat about your current state of mind, any anxiety that may be getting in the way for you, that you may be struggling to let go of. In that time, I'm going to do my best to offer some practices and some insights that might be able to help you on your path. If we are aligned, I'll be offering you a place in my new coaching program. This program is all about taking you from anxiety, stress, overwhelm, fear, and taking you to an abundant mindset. This is a journey I've taken myself on over the past five years, and I'm so excited to hold your hand and to help guide you towards that joy and inner peace as well. All the details for that are below. Feel free to jump in and book your free 30-minute coaching call with me. Thank you so much for being here. I wish you a beautiful rest of your day. Love you.