363 ~ 3 Powerful Self Love Practices

it is time to start taking self love seriously...

come & join me for the foot massage on Patreon now 🙏🏼🦶🏼🪞

love yourself,

love, Madison Mindset x

Chapters

• 0:18 Welcome And New Monday Format
• 0:31 Practices On Patreon
• 1:04 Keeping It Real
• 1:36 Defining Healthy Self-Love
• 2:59 Conditional Vs Unconditional Love
• 5:33 Spotting Ego And Low Esteem
• 6:33 Practice One: Mirror Work
• 8:59 Practice Two: Self-Love Foot Massage
• 9:56 Practice Three: Giving Yourself Grace
• 10:48 Closing And Listener Invitations

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:18

Hello, magical human, and welcome back to Madison Mindset the podcast. My name is Madison. I'm a yoga teacher, a mindset and spirituality coach, and a complete lover of self-love, which is what we're going to go into today. I'm going to begin putting episodes up on Mondays, and these episodes are going to be about practices. So things that I like to do, things that I do as practices, and I'm always going to put the actual practice itself. So you and me doing it together on Patreon. So on the podcast, I'm going to talk to you about it. I'm going to teach you about it. And then on Patreon, if you'd like to follow along with me, then you can go over there and we can do the practice together. So all the details to Patreon are down below. Go and check it out. And yeah, it's going to be great. I really want to share more of the practices that I do regularly to help myself, you know, to fill my own cup to make myself feel better. And yes, I know there's a fan in this video. Can't be bothered to move it. I'm not, I'm never going to be one of those people who's like, let's make the scene perfect. This is real. It's hot here. And that fan is necessary. That fan is so necessary. So it's not going to move. That's where it lives. Um, yeah, permission to be yourself and to be real, whatever. Whatever. It's all, it's all fine. So we're going to be talking about self-love. Now, self-love has been a bit of a buzzword. It's been a bit of a thing. Everyone's obsessed with self-love. And something I've been seeing quite a lot of, and maybe you've seen as well, is people go above and beyond in self-love, in the sense that, you know, if you take self-love too far and it's more of the self-obsession, you become quite egotistical and it's all about you. All about you. You could you completely lose sight of the fact that there are other people in the world. When you're not expressing any kind of self-love, you're in the opposite part of that. You know you're the victim. You know you don't like yourself. You're kind of small. So self-love, I want to call a healthy balance. It is somewhere in the middle. You know you've got room to grow. You know that you've made mistakes. You know that you are more than capable of failing. You know that you're you need to apologize sometimes and that you're always going to do your best, but you still love and respect yourself anyway. And I think that is the difference. You know, when we talk about self-love, we're talking about unconditional love. Right? If you're in, if we just call self-love, you know, healthy self-love is that balanced, really beautiful self-love to have what I was just talking about. And that overactive, egotistical self-love is unless conditional self-love. And the underactive, as in you don't like yourself at all, serious self-esteem issues, that's also conditional self-love. Okay, so conditional and unconditional love. Conditional love is love that is provided based on the conditions being met. Okay, so you put certain conditions on yourself or on others. And if you don't meet those conditions, then you don't earn the love. Unconditional love means there are no conditions, there is no terms of agreement, there are zero boxes that need to be checked, no hoops that need to be hopped through, nothing. You are going to be loved no matter what. Whether you're the best person in the room or you make a fool of yourself. Whether you're the most attractive person or the least attractive person, you are going to be loved. And this is the kind of love that we want to start fostering between, you know, parent and child is very common. You know, parents see the absolute world in their child. You know, there's an unconditional love. We want to have that kind of love between us and a partner. You know, sometimes they're going to wear wear, what am I saying? Sometimes they're going to wear weird clothes. Sometimes they're going to say things that are a bit lame. Sometimes they're going to do things that are annoy you. Sometimes you're going to have to talk to them and say, hey, next time can you do this? Or I didn't like it when you did that. But you still love them. You never take your love away because someone annoyed you or because someone didn't look the way you wanted them to look, right? So you're allowing people to be human and you're allowing yourself to be human. So when we're practicing unconditional love, unconditional self-love, we're right in the middle. You love yourself no matter what. But you're very aware that you're going to make mistakes, you're going to fail, you're going to hurt people, but that's okay because you're going to make it up to them, you're going to apologize, and you're going to be a better person. And you also know that you're great and you're worthy and you're enough. All right. If you're in conditional self-love where you either are egotistical, which actually does highlight self-esteem issues just because you're throwing how great you are down people's face, that actually highlights that you do have self-esteem issues. Because if you completely had confidence in yourself, why would you feel the need to throw your awesomeness down people's throats? You wouldn't have to because people already know, right? People know that you're great. So if you feel like you have to prove your enoughness, your confidence to people, then yeah, you do have self-esteem issues because you're trying to throw it at people, right? The other side as well. That conditional self-love, if you just don't think you do anything right, you're not a good enough person, and you just kind of shrink up into yourself. Both of these states are not healthy. Healthy self-love, unconditional self-love, right in the center. This is what I'm talking about. I'm going to share with you a few practices that I love for fostering self-love. Some of these I still do, others I used to do until I got to a point where I felt like, okay, I love myself. Like I don't need to do that anymore. The first practice, which is one that was a big one for me and is still one I recommend to clients all the time, but I don't necessarily do myself anymore, is mirror work. Mirror work, looking at yourself in the mirror, looking at your own eyes and saying to yourself, I love you. No matter what. I unconditionally love you. Whether you have a giant pimple in your face, whether you make mistakes, whether you tell lame jokes, I love you anyway. I love you always. I love you for exactly who you are. You are enough. That kind of thing in the mirror is incredibly powerful. And I did that practice every single day for a few years in the morning. After I'd brush my teeth, I'd do my mirror work and say to myself, I love you and I accept you for exactly who you are. And I stopped doing that when I found myself doing it naturally. And I've told this story before, but I was in a supermarket and I was walking down the aisle where there's all those fridges right down the side, and you can see your reflection. And it was the first time I noticed myself. I looked at my reflection, I looked at my face, and I smiled at myself. And the word hey came into my mind, like, oh, hey, like, oh, there's a friend. There's someone I love. Hey. And I did that naturally. I didn't mean to do that. I've never done that before. And that moment right there, I realized I had started to develop a really beautiful relationship with myself where when I see my reflection, I don't run. I look into my own eyes and go, hey, like I'm a friend. And that was when I started to back off on the mirror work a little bit because I found I was doing it naturally, you know, in the mirror in the car, in any kind of reflection, whenever I'd see myself, I wasn't ashamed to look at myself. I didn't struggle with that anymore. It felt normal, it felt okay. So if you do struggle, if you hear about mirror work and think, oh no, I don't want to do mirror work, that's a big sign. You probably need to do mirror work. The thing that you don't want to do is probably the thing that's gonna help you the most. The second practice I do for self-love, which I absolutely adore, and I've been doing this for a long time, and I will always do it, is a foot massage. Now, this practice is one I'm gonna guide you on on Patreon. So if you would like to do this foot massage with me and see what I do and try out yourself, go over to Patreon and join me. We're gonna be doing that practice together. But the reason I do this is because it's it's honoring your feet, right? When I was studying yoga and Aururveda and all these beautiful practices, something that came up was using either coconut oil or black sesame oil on the feet every night and massaging your feet because they've worked so hard for you, they carry you around everywhere and they hold so much stress. So it's like a self-honouring thing of like, thank you, feet, for carrying me around when I'm so busy and taking care of me. It is an honoring for the body. And it feels really beautiful, and I really, really love it. I tried it a couple of times and I just went, this is so nice. This is so nice. And your feet are softer, they are healthier, it feels amazing, and you just have better feet. It feels great. So something I do for myself, especially when I feel like I've had a lot on my shoulders and I've been doing so much, when I'm be stuck in heaps of doing, I'll stop and massage my feet in a really intentional moment, maybe listen to some nice music or whatever it is, and it is just such a beautiful practice. So I highly recommend, you know, self-love foot massage. It is the best, doesn't have to take too long, but it just feels incredible. So if you want to do that practice with me, go over to Patreon and let's do that together because it is beautiful. The final practice that I really love for self-love that I'd love to share with you is simply giving myself grace. When you make mistakes, when you're tired, when you're stressed, give yourself grace. Give yourself 10 minutes to go have a nap. Give yourself the afternoon off, give yourself a night off, go to bed early. You know, you are a human being. And when human beings are stressed, when they are fatigued, when they're overworked, they make extra mistakes, they don't handle failures as much, they don't handle people as much in conflict, and their body gets exhausted. Give yourself grace. This is the biggest act of self-love you can do. Okay, when you're in one of those moments where you just putting one foot in front of the other feels like hell, you need to refill your cup. It's your body, it's your mind calling out for help, calling out for, I need a refill, I need a refill of love, I need a refill of energy. And what most of us do is push through. Don't push through that kind of feeling. Okay, do not push through. No, don't push through. Give yourself the refill. Go and have a sleep. Go and massage your feet, go and do some yoga, go and do some meditation. Even if you give yourself 15 minutes, you're gonna come back to your day and be so much happier. Give yourself grace when you need it. Okay, when a child is tired, what do we do? Oh, they need a nap. They need a rest. But when an adult is tired, push through. Doesn't make any sense. You still need a rest, you still need a nap. Thank you so much, Magical Human, for being here and for joining this episode today. I hope you learned something. I hope you found a practice that perhaps you can take away and try yourself and see how it goes. I hope to see some of you over in Patreon where we're going to go and do our foot massage together when you've got a moment today. Grab your coconut oil or your favorite massage oil and let's go and take care of our feet together. So much love to you. Please share this episode with someone you love. Leave a rating or a review, leave a comment on Spotify. I love seeing the comments. It's so beautiful. I read them all. Thank you. I'll see you in the next episode. Love