Soul Talk and Psychic Advice

How To Get Real Answers From A Psychic Reading

• Dr. Donna • Season 1 • Episode 14

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Start with a better question and watch the whole reading change. We explore how the quality of your question determines the clarity of your guidance, why general readings often miss your real concern, and how to move from fear and validation-seeking to agency and alignment. Dr. Donna draws on 25 years of professional experience to unpack the most common traps callers fall into—like asking about feelings instead of actions, or chasing certainty instead of direction—and offers concrete swaps that sharpen insight without sacrificing compassion.

We dig into trauma-informed reframes that protect your self-worth: trading “What’s wrong with me?” for “What pattern is repeating here?” and replacing “How can I fix this?” with “Where do I need boundaries?” If you identify as a people-pleaser or overgiver, you’ll hear practical language that brings you back to yourself, including questions that prioritize emotional safety, honor your needs, and respect your timelines. You’ll also hear why fear shuts intuition down, how curiosity opens it, and why testing a psychic for proof keeps you from receiving the very clarity you want.

By the end, you’ll have a toolkit of questions that illuminate energy, reveal timelines and patterns, and help you choose the next right step. Readings aren’t fortune-telling; they’re energy-telling—and your words are the doorway. If you’re ready to ask like someone who deserves clarity, tune in, take notes, and try these reframes on your next call. If this conversation helped, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review so more seekers can find their way to empowering questions.

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Hello, it's Dr. Donna, and welcome to another episode of my podcast, Soul Talk and Psychic Advice. Today I want to talk about the best way to have your questions answered when calling a psychic. Now, the best way to have them answered is to have a clear question. You know, sometimes people call for general reading, and I tell them don't do that unless you have an hour and you're willing to hear anything and everything but what you may be calling for. People think that we're just going to automatically, yeah, we do know why people are calling, right? But we're not going to automatically answer those questions if you just say a general reading. We're actually going to have your guide say, What do you want this person to know? And a lot of times what your guides want you to know is not why you're calling. You'd be surprised. You think that there's an alignment between you and your spirit guides, but there really isn't. Your spirit guides have a plan for you and they want you to get there, and they want you to accomplish certain things and under certain understand certain things about your life and your relationships with people, and you may not have any interest in what they have to say. Only when I do a reading, people have asked questions and they go, Is there something else do you think I should know? I'm like, Okay, spirit guides, tell her what you think she needs to know right now. And that's how I handle that situation, but I don't like general readings because a lot of times you can hear good stuff, but it's not really what you're looking for. But I notice that sometimes people don't know how to ask a question and maybe because they haven't received a reading before, or they're thinking from a general standpoint, or they just haven't been taught to ask for what they want and be direct. So I want to help people out who need help asking a question. It's very important. I've been doing readings professionally for just about 25 years now, um, 20 almost 21 years on the platform Keen, and I also do them privately, and I've done them on radio shows. I've done a lot of readings and I've talked to a lot of awesome people. So today I want to talk about what is not really taught, how to ask better questions when you call a psychic. Because the truth is, most people ask questions from fear, from heartbreak, from panic, from abandonment wounds, or from wanting someone outside of them to tell them that they're okay. And when you ask from a place of like fear or wounds, the reading becomes foggy, confusing, or incomplete. It's not as clear. And I have an obsession with trying to be detailed. If I'm not detailed, it's because there's no more information, I won't make it up. And I really hope I'm not here to brighten someone's day or make them feel good, but I'm hoping that I'm giving clarity to the best of my ability. So I try to keep my filter clean by working on myself and you know, really being clear for the day so I can really serve the people that I'm reading. So it's very important to know how to ask the questions. So today I'm gonna help you ask questions that lead to clarity, truth, healing, and empowerment, not anxiety or stress. But a lot of times people call us, you know, when something tough is going on. Very few people do call and say, I just want to know the next step in my life, or you know, they're not really calling for themselves, they're calling about people that they're having relationships with, whether it's family, friends, romantic, and or work people, and they're trying to navigate through them, but still, it's very important to have clear questions. A lot of times people are calling in a fit of frustration, and so the energy isn't clear. But I want to talk about making vague questions more clear. So let's start with the most common thing that people ask. Okay, this question, how does he feel about me? Now, there's nothing wrong with wanting to know that, right? But the question is broad, is too passive and too open-ended. And here's why. Because feelings change, feelings shift. Feelings are not the same thing as connection, intention, or action. And a lot of times there's this belief, right? And I see it on social media that if people care, they're gonna know how to treat you, if they love you, they're gonna treat you good, you don't have to worry. And I remember when people would call and say, Does so-and-so love me? I wouldn't say yes right away or no right away because I knew a lot of assumptions would go on and they'd probably hang up the phone because they think, okay, this person loves me, they're gonna be good to me, they're not gonna lie to me, they're not gonna cheat, they're not gonna, you know, do any harm, and that's just not true. So, you know, when you think that if somebody has good feelings for you, it doesn't mean that they're gonna treat you right because people can only treat you as well as they are healed. That's just a fact. A better question is more like what is the current emotional energy between us? What role does this connection play in my life? What direction is this moving in over the next few weeks? What do I need to understand about this situation? Because a lot of times when someone calls, just about every time someone calls, they say, What does someone feel about me? They're thinking, they're having an issue, right? They're having a problem with this person, and they think I'm gonna say, Okay, you're having a problem, that means he doesn't care. You're having a problem that means that this person's gonna break up with you. And that isn't necessarily so. We can have problems with people and still love them, still want them, still desire them. But a lot of times people think, especially women, that what a man feels about them or what their partner feels about them, and just in case their partner's also a female, that that translates into the state of the relationship, and it really doesn't. And that goes back to black and white thinking. If somebody cares, they're gonna do you right. If they don't care, they're not gonna do you right. And it isn't like that. Life is gray. So, do you feel how these questions have more clarity when you say something like, What role does this connection play in my life? Or you know, what do I need to understand about this situation? You you know, and if you give a little bit of detail, the situation does not skew the reading. You you know, because we want to make sure that you know, especially me when I'm doing reading, so I answer everything that you call for because you're spending money. You know, I'm not doing this for free, so no way. You're spending money, and I want to honor that and give you the best possible reading and details. And just because you say, Well, this person says they broke up with you, I kind of say, Yeah, yeah, they're gone, because you a lot of times it's uh impulse, right? When people say that. I'm finding that out more and more, and it doesn't mean that you're leading the reading anywhere. You really aren't. So asking a general question just doesn't go deep enough. A lot of times I answer it, and then I say, You're calling and you're asking this because there's a situation going on. Feel free to share the situation with me. It's not gonna change anything from what I just told you. I do do that. I think that's very important to shoot straight with people. So when you ask better questions, the energy gets focused. And so does the reading, you know. So that's very important because I don't want to give a vague reading. I have no desire to do that. Now let's talk about questions that come from trauma, especially abandonment, wounds, or childhood, emotional neglect. These sound like, why didn't he choose me? Nothing's wrong with you, huh? It's energy, it's just you guys weren't in alignment. And remember, rejection is protection. And a lot of times people call me back, they're like, Thank God I wasn't chosen. Guess what I found out about him? You know, and so it's a blessing, but when someone calls, I'm gonna answer it, but a lot of times it's not gonna be satisfying because I almost feel like the the caller wants me to say something's wrong with you. Just change this one thing and he'll choose you, and that isn't how it works. We're not likely nothing's wrong with you unless you're just some crazy neurotic person. But uh it isn't that you need to be prettier or thinner or smarter or more educated, none of that. It's all energy. Okay, and then when you ask the question, why does he or she treat me like this? You know, I will explain it, but also don't personalize it, don't take on the mistreatment as your fault. Please don't do that. Or what's wrong with me? Oh god, so it breaks my heart when people say that, but when people are rejected a lot, they go, What's wrong with me? And it's like there's nothing wrong with you, you just haven't met your energetic match. What did I do? If you done if you didn't do something obvious, you you know, in the situation and mess things up, even if I tell you, you know, as a psychic or the person themselves tell you, you're not gonna believe it. And I've seen that. I try to explain things to certain people, and they're just like, no, no, because they're looking for like something's wrong, and I know that's trauma-based because they probably grew up with criticism or abuse or some form of trauma, and they're carrying that, thinking that something's wrong with them. So these aren't good questions. You can say, I feel like this, is that true or not? You know, I feel like I did something wrong. Well, this is what I did. Is this the reason why he left? I could say yes or no, you know, and then I will go into detail, but think about your questions and and don't like put yourself down. Because these questions aren't really about intuition, they're about pain, survival mode, and a nervous system trying to find safety. And more than likely, a psychic's not going to be able to give you safety. When you ask a psychic a question like that, you're not looking for clarity, you're looking for self-worth. And no matter what I say, and there's plenty of times I I tell people, you know it's really not you, right? You get that, they don't get that. And psychics can't give you self-worth. We can't give you anything but as much clarity as possible, and and how you feel is how you feel. We can't change that. So I can help you see patterns, but healing comes from within. That's really the only way. So a better question would sound like what pattern is repeating for me here? You know, we want to figure out the pattern so you can break away from people who are hurting you. What is my nervous system trying to protect me from? Because rejection is protection. We don't always see that because women we're kind of taught that when a man picks you, you have value. And it's like, no, we have to get away from that. You have value outside of being picked. We're not puppies in a litter. What lesson is this relationship showing me? Because sometimes we got to learn something, our self-worth, our empowerment, our growth, and walk away so we can get the real partner that we deserve. Where do I need emotional safety? These are better questions. They shift the reading from self-blame, be you know, please stop blaming yourself unless you're a jerk, to self-understanding, to understand the dynamics. Because always say as a psychic, I'm a life strategist, and I help people navigate life and how to deal with other people. But if you're gonna personalize everything that someone does to you, you're gonna miss it. You you can't personalize it, even if it hurts. You know, it's more than likely not you. Okay, like when somebody says, What does someone like about me? They're gonna try to be more of that one thing to get that person to like them. And it's like, no, you can't do that. You gotta be yourself and say, That's enough, unless you need to really work on yourself because you're acting out of out of integrity, out of character. You know, that's why it's important to not self-blame and to heal and to work on worthiness. And you all know I speak on this consistently. People, pleasers, and overgivers come to readings with the very specific energy. I'm overgiver in recovery. The questions sound like, what else can I do to make this work? Did I do too much? That's always used to be my question. Should I have been more patient? Oh shoot, been there, done that. Now I'm more of a zero tolerance girl. What should I change about myself to fix this? Sometimes we have to work on ourselves. Don't get me wrong. You know, we all are work in progress, but a lot of times people are being abused or thinking that they need to fix themselves instead of the abuser needing to fix themselves. You know, because it goes back to, you know, they used to have to fight to get their caretakers' love, and now they're like fighting to get this broken person's love, and they're like, okay, I change, I change, just love me. And it's like, nah. Okay, no. These questions break my heart, they do. I'm I'm a human, yeah, you know, because they come from the belief that you must earn love, approval or connection. And no, you don't. Better questions are where do I need to set boundaries? That's really what it is. I'm a boundaries queen now, and I like to teach that. What am I abandoning it within myself to have this relationship? Because when we're trying to have a relationship with a difficult person, whether it's family, friend, romantic, partner, whoever, we are abandoning some part of ourselves. And it looks like I need to do a whole podcast on self-abandonment, which I feel like I do that one next. And another question is what would honoring my needs look like right now? Let us help you. Sometimes as psychics are coaches, and a lot of psychics have psychology degrees, coaching, certain certifications. You know, I have a lot of training in somatic and trauma and foreign work. Let us help you. You know, let's not turn this into a fortune-telling thing. You're so much more than that. So these questions put you back in your power. Psychic guidance is not meant to reinforce your self-sacrifice, or at least not with me. Um, it is meant to help you see where you're disappearing so you can come home to yourself. You got that right. Um, validation-based questions. Okay, another big category. People who come to a psychic because they want to be told that they're right, that they're not crazy, and that the universe approves of them. The questions sound like, did I do the right thing, right? He'll come back if I wait, right? I'm not making a mistake, am I? And sometimes you it's okay to ask those questions, but a lot of times people want me to tell them what they want to hear, and they get mad when I don't because they see things in one way and they only see it a certain way, and that's just not gonna always work out. If you can't if you can't have an open mind, don't call a psychic. You're wasting your time and your money because you may not hear what you want to hear. So these questions come from a need for certainty, and certainty is not the purpose of intuitive guidance. We have forks in a road, there's different approaches. Instead, try asking what direction aligns with my highest good. What am I not seeing in this situation? What outcome supports my healing? You don't need a psychic to approve your choices. I'm not here to approve or anything. Who am I? To where you need my approval, seriously, and you need a psychic to illuminate the path, but you will walk it, right? This is your journey, and so that's important to remember. Now let's talk about fear-based questions that block intuition. Finally, the fear questions. These activate the freeze response. As soon as fear takes over, your intuition goes offline. They sound like is something bad going to happen? It's subjective. A car accident could be bad to one person. Some people are like, okay, I had a car accident. Okay, at least I didn't die. You know, so it's all subjective, right? And I don't like to ask those questions when people go, is there something I need to look out for? It's like, how do you answer that? Because it's very subjective. Am I going to lose anything? Maybe. We all are. Okay, we all are. And I don't like to read death because I think that's personal between the person and their creator. Is the universe punishing me? No. It's very heartbreaking. And I know like I grew up Southern Baptist with that God will punish you if you do X, Y, Z. And you know, obviously, other people have had that experience, and when they have a lot of bad luck, they think the universe is punishing them. But the universe doesn't punish the universe just responds to our action or lack of. And sometimes we don't make the best decisions, or we trust the wrong people, or something, right? Good things happen to bad people because we trust too much, or we didn't like learn we thought it'd be different for us, or you know, our trauma stepped in and just said, try, try, try, even when we should have stopped. Then something bad happens, and we think, Well, I'm a good person. Why'd this bad thing happen? It's just cause and effect. It really is. It's nothing bigger than that. The universe doesn't have any emotions, it just responds to energy. So the universe can't punish you. But sometimes we just do things that we shouldn't do. You know, I remember trying to work things out with a family member that kept on hurting me. This sibling just kept on and kept on. And you know, it almost got me into some big legal trouble because I was so busy trying to save that relationship, and they were taking advantage of that. And it got to court, and I literally had to like snitch on them to save my own skin because I could have gone to jail for something I didn't do, and it was big. And I just I remember thinking, but I'm a good person, but I'm trying, I'm trying, but I was effing myself over. I almost said the word. I was effing myself over by trying so hard with the wrong person. So stop trying to save a relationship with the wrong person, and you won't feel punished. So, better questions are where can I cultivate safety right now? What energy cycle am I entering? What can I prepare for or support myself through? You know, fear blocks intuition, curiosity opens it, right? I love when callers call open and curious, they're the ones that get their predictions all the time. And people are fear or obsessed with time frames, they will never get their predictions. They just won't, and I tell them, you know, the time frames are going to be off, or the predictions are going to take forever because of the energy being put out. So when you ask them for cure from curiosity, these questions, the answers become clear, grounded, and very empowering. So I think that's important because a lot of times, you know, we we just we want to know something, but I don't know. Sometimes maybe people are testing the psychic, right? And and they're thinking, well, you know, if they're a psychic, they should know. So I could just ask, you know, from a general standpoint, and they should know. You know, I and I tell people, if you're gonna play test of psychic, let's hang up. I even refund them or have King refund them. I'm just like, I just don't want to do that. I don't want to play games. I I I really respect people, you know, nothing's perfect, even science shifts all the time. What we knew before, we know something different now. So nothing's written in stone but our birth and our death, right? Everything in between could just happen. And, you know, we don't have control over much, although a lot of people think if I can control, I feel safe. But there's no such thing as control. So I'm gonna leave you with this. Psychic readings are not fortune telling, it's not, I'm just gonna tell you a whole bunch of good things about your life, and you don't have to participate in your life at all. This is gonna happen because you're a good person, right? That's like saying you get a college degree without going to college, passing the courses, doing the papers and stuff, right? You just get the degree without doing the work. Readings are showing energy telling. We're reading the energy, they show possibilities, patterns, timelines, and emotional truths. But the answers you receive always match the quality of the questions you ask. They just do. So when you ask for fear, hopelessness, or self-flame, the reading becomes murky. Not because the psychic is wrong, but because the questions didn't open the right doorway. That's important. Your questions are the doorway. Ask like someone who deserves clarity, ask your questions like someone who is ready to be empowered, ask like someone who trusts themselves. And if you want to learn how to ask questions that transform your intuition, your relationships, and your life, make sure you join my community. I do have a community called Hang Out with Dr. Donna, which I will put a link to. It's gonna be a great place for I'd be facilitating, but it's a great place to ask questions, it's a great place to understand the psychic world, and I get to hang out with you, and you get to hang out with me, and I I would feel blessed to hang out with you. So definitely, you know, join my community. You deserve clarity, you deserve truth, you deserve answers that support your growth and your and not your wounds, right? So I want to thank you for listening to this episode of my podcast today. You know, is very important, you know. Um to really be clear, clear in your intentions, be intentional, because you're speaking to the universe too, not just to me. So thank you for listening, and I will see you in the next episode.