In the perfume-laced corners of this episode, we serve up an honest review of the listener-requested Colonia Essenza by Acqua Di Parma, a fragrance that has sparked some... let's say 'interesting' feedback. There's also a detailed critique of Axiom by Soma Parfums, a scent that charmed us with its old school appeal and balanced blend. We aren't afraid to get controversial either; your investment in the Creed of Aventus shower gel and candle, is it worth it? Join us to find out. This episode is your invitation to dive nose-first into a world of intriguing scents, lively debates, and a whole lot of laughs.
In the perfume-laced corners of this episode, we serve up an honest review of the listener-requested Colonia Essenza by Acqua Di Parma, a fragrance that has sparked some... let's say 'interesting' feedback. There's also a detailed critique of Axiom by Soma Parfums, a scent that charmed us with its old school appeal and balanced blend. We aren't afraid to get controversial either; your investment in the Creed of Aventus shower gel and candle, is it worth it? Join us to find out. This episode is your invitation to dive nose-first into a world of intriguing scents, lively debates, and a whole lot of laughs.
Hello, ladies and gentle germs, welcome to the Colonia podcast.
Myke:I'm Mike, I'm Ryan. We're two best friends. We're fighting emotional battles, smelling fragrances, giving you an un-attracted opinion, and today, ryan, we are smelling a listener request.
Ryan:Yeah, we actually had this scent a while ago. I believe the gentleman's name is Mike. So, mike, this is for you. You had Senus Aqua Deparma, great name, yeah, colonia Asensia, I believe, and it's something I've actually been wanting to smell for a long time. And today's your lucky day, pal, oh yeah baby Hell, yeah, oh yeah.
Myke:Let me tell you what Hossian G on Fragrantica says about this fragrance. Ryan, okay, I really so wonder why so many love this cologne. It's exactly like traditional soap. When I smelled this perfume, just remembered about a public bathroom don't like Next. Three out of 10. Hossian G Okay, he says smell like a public bathroom that he did not like Next.
Ryan:Yeah, I'm with him. I don't like smells like that. Yeah, that's the very like.
Myke:Rajadav, the back burner of them, rajadav fragrances.
Ryan:I'm going to have to hard disagree on that. One Haven't smelled a Rajadav that smelled like a piss cake or whatever those things are Well.
Myke:I remember the first time we smelled some of the Rajadavs I was like oh, and I was like yeah, that's dirty.
Ryan:Well before we get into this fragrance. We got to do that one night stand review of that one lovely fragrance that I'm not going to go to the phone and get the answer to, because I totally remember what we did.
Myke:I'm pretty sure it's axiom, axiom by Soma Parfums. Roll that beautiful music, todd yeah.
Ryan:One night stand review. Well, mike, after being an asshole and having such a great, genuine person reach out that, stan Rothschild from Soma Parfums Also fragrance podcasts as well. Very good, you guys should check it out. The Laodorants, lezodorants, and yeah, what do you think about it? Because I have a little something to say about it, but I'll look you to your thing first. But what do you think about it after you've spent the night with it?
Myke:I've spent many nights with it and I bought it.
Ryan:I knew that I knew that when you, when you're about to say that, I knew that.
Myke:I paid my own money for it. In fact, steve listened to the episode and he sent me a voice message and he said hey, just wanted to make sure you're okay in that your tongue isn't so far lodged up, dan's ass, that you're still able to communicate. And I said, yeah, I'm using sign language. And then I sent up the receipt and said I bought that thing with my own money. Yeah, steve, yeah, so suck on them, steve.
Ryan:You need to have him back on the show. It's been a minute. I know I miss that guy.
Myke:Me too, I get to see him in Italy and if you're not too chicken, shit you could do, and Dan's going to be there. Listen to this lineup, brian, and tell me why the hell you would not go to Italy. Okay, the fragrance weirdo, that's a good one. Fragmental top shelf, every man fragrance, right there on the same show and frag dictated probably on. They're all probably on the same shelf. Honestly, the top shelf yeah, they're going to be there and yours truly man.
Ryan:It's like the only thing that would prevent me from that is death and a fiery plane crash. So I'm good, bro, I don't know, I'll do some thinking on it. Yeah, have my come to Jesus moment, and once I'm right with God, I won't be afraid to fly anywhere as difficult as life is these days.
Myke:Sometimes I'm like, would it be so bad? It probably wouldn't. Honestly, it would be that sweet release. But, that being said, tell me what you think about. Axiom by soma Parfums.
Ryan:So Mike and I have been going on a weight loss journey. Hello, hey, we're sexy or not, and it just started for me, so literally today. I think it's been like two days into it, but we were wearing at first off. I put on La Tofa's Udh for Glory and I was like God damn, you're allowed, what are you fucking wearing? Yeah, dude, that was loud and you thought it actually smelled like.
Myke:I was like you got some sort of Bakarai Rouge type thing going on.
Ryan:Yeah, weird. Now, when I told you what it was, did it realign your brain to go? Oh no, it smells more like Udh for greatness. Yeah, okay, yeah.
Myke:But it definitely has that same type of vibe which is just like I'm going to choke, hold you and hold you down. I'm going to rub my chest all over your nose and you love those type of fragrances, god.
Ryan:I love those fragrances, but I digress. After you gave me that compliment, we went to these little incline push-up bars out in the park and I was like damn, my walkie-talkie. I was like what are you wearing? He was like man, I'm wearing axiom and I'm going to tell you guys, it smells pretty damn good, yeah, pretty good. So is it a? Buy it? Sample it? Skip it. What do you want to do? I know you bought it. Would you recommend it as a sample by yeah, I think people should sample it.
Myke:It's not for everybody, but it is really wearable and it's pretty masculine, has a little bit of like that mature sort of old school vibe to it, but nothing crazy.
Ryan:Yeah, it's like old school and it's scent profile, but it's not abusive to people within a five foot radius, like old school furniture.
Myke:It's not like you're wearing brute, yeah, it's sharp.
Myke:It's nice. It has that citrus. It's got that sweeter, woodsier, and the more I wear it, the more I kind of smell that. I think he said there's like birch, like quite a bit of birch in it or something. Yeah, I can't remember some sort of like lighter wood that he said they used a ton of, and you really start to pick that up. It's a really nice fragrance. So try it If you're so interested. I really did like it. I wasn't, you know, blowing smoke and I ended up buying it.
Ryan:There you go. You heard from the man himself. Yeah, now let's get into today's episode. I've been really mega heresy on this for quite a while now and apologies to Mike. I'll say Mike C, apologize to Mike, that is taking this long. First off, you send a shitload of stuff, so it's hard to get to all these fragrances whenever we have a bunch of people send us a shitload of stuff. But man, we about to smell this thing.
Myke:Let's roll it up and smoke it, you ready, ready bro?
Ryan:Yeah, here we go.
Myke:Damn, here we go, hit it on the card.
Ryan:I see why this is loved and I see why it's hated by Hacienda G Money or whatever. His name was, hacienda G.
Myke:I feel like yeah, it's like a stankier neroli portofino it's pretty bad. Yeah, it's got got some clackers to it.
Ryan:Yeah, it's like that, with like a little bit of outer tinge to it. It's very citrus. I like that. There was a ton of citrus in there. Man that is stout. Yeah, it does kind of have an old school soap vibe, but not not really one to one. I kind of get the outer edge of it. It's kind of similar to that, but I smell so much citrus that I feel like that kind of covers that up more. Does that make sense? Yeah, you know what you're saying, but damn, this is a clean fucking smell.
Myke:Yeah, it's like a lighter floral citrus. It's nice. It's got a little bit of like a little pickle action to it. How you fucking ruined it for me.
Ryan:Really, I can't do that, dude.
Myke:It's got like a little twinge of what like Versace Arrows had. Hmm, that kind of little that bite.
Ryan:Thankfully I'm not really smelling that, but I think I get what you mean, like that.
Myke:Yeah, some of that really sour, pucker-power citrus. Yeah, kind of gives that kind of like that Get out of here. You're pumpkin pie haircut.
Ryan:Oh God, I'm right now as it stands. I'm a big fan of this, yeah that 4711, the Roli Portofino floral citrus soapy. Yeah, I feel like it's like I feel like it's better than both those on the card.
Myke:But it's really nice, less pickly on the card to me Very beautiful on the card, Wow that is pretty.
Ryan:I feel like this is, but it's similar to those, but I feel like this so far has done it better than both those, really Okay. Yeah, I'm not saying like it's not like this more elegant thing, they're very similar, very close, but I just feel like it's loud where it needs to be and because of that little like aura that I said, it kind of has around it, it's more colonia. You know what I mean. So it's like it's kind of got an atmosphere to it. I feel like this is it's kind of brighter because of that no-transcript. I really kind of like this kind of juicy.
Myke:On the card. It is a beautiful fragrance On the skin, not really sure what my body is doing to it. I also really smell like Italian urban cheese because Ryan and I just sat down in Subway to eat. Don't usually like to eat at Subway because then I just walk out smelling like freshly baked bread.
Ryan:Oh God, we're trying to be healthy. Guys, Get off our fucking bag, yeah.
Myke:I had a protein bowl 450 calories. I hadn't even added my calorie shit up today. Well, I also had a cookie and a half, which that's an extra 300 calories. Yeah, they were oatmeal raisin.
Ryan:Love those cookies. Hmm, live a little. I swear to God, we're trying to be healthy. I'll get off our fucking bag.
Myke:I mean for me. I've lost quite a bit of weight already. Last month I did really well. So I started on my birthday and since then I've had a few hiccup days, but just kind of right back on the horse. If I fell off, I just hop right back on it.
Ryan:Oh, that guy's name that was in police academy Michael oh Winslow. Yeah, that's what it's like. It's like being around Michael out sometimes. Probably both of us. We have different things we can do sound effects on. Yeah, I like to do this sound effect. My kids fucking hate it, but I do a walking in squishy shoes sound effect and I like watch their feet as they hit the ground. They can't stand it. I do it all the time. I'm a fucking idiot.
Myke:It reminds me of whose line is it anyway? When they would do that thing where they'd have somebody pretend to be a barber or something, they'd have somebody over there with a microphone doing all the.
Ryan:Yeah.
Myke:I love that show Such a good show, I swear the games are made up and the points don't matter. Yeah, kind of like this podcast in a way.
Ryan:It doesn't fucking matter, guys. But let's get back to this. I agree with Mike. I think the car stock definitely smells better than the skin. It's really pretty and man, it's even sharper and a little bit more sour on the car.
Myke:To me it's not more sour on the car. To me it's actually a little bit more floral, damn yeah.
Ryan:It smells good, though so far I think it pulls down Tom Ford's pants. Oh really, yeah, I think it does. Wow, I really do so far. Hmm, I mean I really can't claim the 4711 like it's pants on that one. I mean that one's 15 bucks, yeah, that one's going to have the price edge probably on this and especially the Tom.
Myke:Ford one. Well, let's get into pricing trend. Tell me about that price edge, Ryan.
Ryan:Well, the price fragrance net 100 ml 83 bucks.
Myke:Wow, not bad. I mean, that is a discount. Do you know what retail is? Wow, yeah, yeah, it does, didn't you? You normally give retail price? Oh yeah, I do Don't know. Wow, you went lazy today. Well, you were the one pushing to do this episode. You don't care? Here we go.
Ryan:Surrounded by amateurs on their website. By the way, the bottle, do you kind of like the bottle? Yeah, it's sexy, no doubt Very sexy. Black white label, black slick On the website. Damn, they make 100 and 180 ml. What is that now?
Myke:I don't know If I had to guess, it would probably be like six ounces. Let's just choose your size.
Ryan:We do not currently ship to your destination. Oh, god damn it. So they can't even like tell me a price. Well, that's the price I know, for right now, guys, they can't ship to America. Wow, okay, so 80 bucks, yeah, 80 something bucks. Yeah, it's probably 120, probably, if I were to guess.
Myke:Hmm, it's purely speculation, okay, and the trend, the trend. And she's pretty juicy, pretty slurpy.
Ryan:I see why I'm kind of confused, why it's trending right now in the colder months, but it's trending. Maybe they're getting people gifts or something that like this Because they solid smell, it is good, man, damn, it is right now. Actually. You know what it's getting down to. What On the card right now. Guys, if you love Green Irish Tweed or if you like, what's it called Irish Spring Soap that we like so much, yeah, it's getting similar to that.
Myke:I don't like the kind of thing going on with Green Irish Tweed. It's got a little bit of a stankiness to it.
Ryan:I don't like Do you feel like this is closer to the Irish Spring Soap? Then, yeah, I would say so, man it smells pretty damn good.
Myke:This is more pleasant than Green Irish Tweed to me.
Ryan:I can get behind that. Yeah, I can get you. It resonates what I said a minute ago. This is a very clean smell. I think the reviewer, Hossy Enda G-Money I think he's being truthful and that it does smell like kind of a soap, but for me I'm like that's a very clean smell. I can't imagine you walking by somebody and they go God, you smell like dog shit. What is that?
Myke:Okay, what's the fragrance? You really don't like Ryan, that really don't like. Yeah that we've done an episode on.
Ryan:That we've done an episode on that you really didn't like. Oh, I mean the most recent one in memory. I can tell you I don't know past that. Hit it up, that's that blue Atlantic.
Myke:Okay, that's bullshit. So then here's a question for you. I'm just going off a script here. Go for it. You have the option to either wear no fragrance for the rest of your life or only wear that. Would you wear it or would you go without fragrance?
Ryan:As much as I don't like that one, I would not wear it. I just wouldn't wear fragrance. Really, I promise I would not wear that. I promise I would not wear that. I believe you, it gave me a headache.
Myke:It smelled terrible. I think your anger gave you the headache. It may have, but it did not smell good. You're like you know that meme of the kid where he's got like veins popping out of his forehead. It's like they always use it for, like when guys who drive trucks can't back into a parking spot. I love backing into a parking spot.
Ryan:Would you wear that fragrance if it was the only fragrance on earth that you could fucking wear? Yeah.
Myke:You're a full of shit. I mean it wasn't bad, but I would. Would I wear it every day? No, there'd be some days I would go without a fragrance, no problem.
Ryan:You know, it kind of reminds me of the more I think about it and I've barely used it that bottle of commodity that you gave me, oh wool, yeah, that one's better, but it still does this thing that I don't like. It kind of gives me a headache.
Myke:Yeah, somebody sold me a bill of goods on that one. You were super stoked. I was. I was talking to one of our mutual friends that's a female and she was just basically going on and on about how, oh yeah, that fragrance, that's a lady killer, that's super sexy. I was like I'll take a gamble Worst gamble of your life, wasn't it? It got to an aquatic thing that I was just like here you go, pal.
Ryan:You know what it also tells me too, though. Just wear the shit you like, though, oh yeah.
Myke:I actually wore it whenever I don't know was it a year ago, it's been a minute we took the kids and did a Halloween like carnival type thing in our community and I was wearing it that day and I had a couple people tell me I smell good. But I was like I don't like how I smell, but everyone else does. That's why I was also kind of wondering it's like, would you wear something that you don't like just to know that, like, people would still think you smell good, you just wouldn't like it.
Ryan:I couldn't do it. I really couldn't do it. I'd roll around the goddamn I don't know, raspberry bush or something. I'd get something natural. I would not wear that shit.
Myke:That's funny. Yeah, you can go straight herbal on it. I just have to double down on the type of soaps I would use.
Ryan:You can buy Creed of Ventus Body Gel like shower gel you know, I've actually was thinking about Creed of Ventus recently because some dumbass bought a bottle of it. Oh yeah, not me, but I am super. He's supposed to get it. I'm super excited to see it. But I remember that they sell the soap and the candle and I really want to try the candle now, but I'm like it's I remember being expensive, wasn't it?
Myke:I don't know of a Creed of Ventus candle. I know the body, or maybe I'm thinking of the soap. The soap was like 80 bucks Fuck For shower gel. I think it was the soap and I was like you know what, just because it's that expensive makes me tempted to try it.
Ryan:Yeah, I'm tempted to, but then, hell, I saw a discount for that Layton body wash.
Myke:There's a Layton body wash. Yeah, oh Lord, here we go.
Ryan:Let me, let me tell you the price. I bet you might get a little horny on this.
Myke:Man, I'd be so scared because again, we talked about my deodorant fiasco. I'd be worried about the soap too, because it's a very similar type of process to me.
Ryan:Ready, I'm ready. Official Parfums De Marley Layton shower gel 6.7 ounces. Okay, $39.
Myke:$39 bucks. Yeah, wow, that's a buy. You want to buy that? Huh, I'll buy that. Right now Is on fragrance net. Nope, our fragrances. I'm buying that. I will buy that today. I'm thinking about it.
Ryan:We just go half on it so we can try it.
Myke:I was like I am not going to shower with you, Ryan. I'm not saying this Every time you want to shower to, that's good. I'm like, hey, you want to buy the shower. You want to go in hamsies and share our shower? Oh God. Well, I'm going to show up wrapped in a towel. Hey, will you put some of that on my loofah?
Ryan:I wonder if this reminds me God, this is well subject guys. It reminds me of those like an ask reddit question. It was something about what's something that's kind of always been sold is like really sexy but it's actually really terrible. And somebody it was like one of the most upvoted things that somebody said, or comments. Somebody said it was a pair of freezing guys. So I'm not a fucking word, smith. Okay, I was listening to one of our episode. Was it showering together? Yes, they said, or shower sex, or showering together. It's like it's just awkward. I think it was showering together, that's what it was because they're like it's just awkward because you're sitting there while one person has like all the hot water hitting on.
Myke:You're just like waiting in limbo and it's like it's not that great. I mean, it's not feasible every time, but if you make the most out of it, it's a lot of fun.
Ryan:Yeah, I'm sure about that, but they did make a good point, because if you're just showering, that part's just kind of like.
Myke:I'm covered in suds over here. Look, the view is still nice for them.
Ryan:Hey, can you show me your face. Can you turn the hot water up a little bit? I don't have to go in hazy with you on the late night, okay, yeah.
Myke:So I'll take my own risks when it comes to suds in my body. Up there. Let's talk about who's wearing those fragrance Colonia Esenza.
Ryan:Man, I feel like a really well put together young person, not too young, wow, I think a very 25 to 35 would rock the holy shit out of this.
Myke:Really I think that's kind of young Really. This does feel because it has that older kind of soapy vibe to it. This does feel a little bit more mature. What age range are you thinking? 40 and up.
Ryan:I guess I could get behind that. But there is something kind of like sweet and sharp to this, to where I'm just like man, I don't know, I don't know, I don't. I think that honestly, I could see a young person rocking this. I'm talking like the young cat who's probably got his life together way before most of us and is wearing like a nice white shirt, chilling for the day Hmm, I'm not saying you're wrong. Drives a fucking I don't know Oddie, yeah, probably so. He's wearing sunglasses, has resting asshole face, yeah.
Myke:Instagram influencer type guy. No, I mean, for me this feels like 40s and up. You want a clean, citrusy, warmer weather fragrance. You want to wear something to the office that's pleasing, has a little bit of personality but isn't overbearing. I think this is it?
Ryan:Yeah, I can see. I can see where you're going with it. I I somewhat agree. I don't know. I really feel like for me it's young, but I I, I, I I.
Myke:This isn't to convince you, it's to convince the audience. Oh well, skip it, sample it or buy it. What are you going to do, ryan?
Ryan:It's a skip, really. Okay, nothing's going to beat the 4711 price point yeah 15 bucks.
Myke:You have to see how this holds on, though, because that one, it is literally an Odecalone, so it is really low in concentration and it goes away quick. The beautiful thing about it is it's so cheap. You could just carry a bottle around with you in the car, exactly, and splash it on. Yeah, but if you're spending I don't know, this would be whatever four times the price about for it, you know. Yeah, does it last four times long? I don't know. We're going to find out. It's not bad For me. It is a sample for sure. Okay, if you like the 4711 stuff, if you like Neuroly, portofino, those type of fragrances, anthony Hopkins a little throwback episode if you like those sort of floral, citrus, old school vibes, I think it's worth a sample. I will not do anything with it. I'm not going to buy it. I won't buy a decant of it. I don't need it. I just bought a Ventus.
Ryan:Is it in yet? Do you get delivered? It's got to it by now. I'm ready to pretend like I've never smelled it and sprayed from the real deal for once. Just go ham dude. I've only experienced it in decants. Do you think that sometimes you have experienced something in a decant? This probably should be a frigging philosophy, but have you experienced something in a decant and then experienced it in the real bottle and you're like I like it more now or less? Hmm, because we do have to agree with decanting. The only the big hang up is like you got a really spray to get somewhat of a wearing, but it's not. I found that it's not as much as like getting from a real bottle and getting that real atomizer shit going on.
Myke:It's like a soda fountain versus in a glass bottle scenario. Yeah, to me at least. I think that's a good fragrance philosophy episode. We should dive into it and look, there's going to be people out there like RXL 209. That'll go. You guys have just been. You're doing all this decant reviews, the sample reviews. Hey, this is actually a fragrance philosophy I feel like we're built and made for because we have sampled so many decants that I think yeah, I think we could compare. There have been plenty of samples that we've then gone and bought the bottle and has the experience been different? You'll find out on our next fragrance philosophy episode here on the Cologne podcast.
Ryan:It's a skip. For me, it's a sample.
Myke:It's a sample for y'all. It's a skip for me too.
Ryan:Oh, so I mean you kind of agree with what I'm saying, or just different kind of mindset on it?
Myke:I mean, I'm just saying, if the people are interested in what they should do, I think, give it a sample. If you're into those, does everyone need to sample it? No, but if you are just rock hard horny for some Neurolyportafino, you might like this and it's way cheaper.
Ryan:Yeah, but I think if you really want that spring tea you can go 47-11 and it's even cheaper than this.
Myke:I know, but we haven't wore it out, seen how it kind of interacts we have with 47-11. It's gone in 10 minutes. Yeah, 10 minutes, but those are some good 10 minutes. They're juicy and they're cheap.
Ryan:Okay, guys, if you love today's episode we hope you do, and God love you. If you do, make sure to go to thecolonepodcastcom. That's the website, that's the link. Whatever, make sure to hit us up on Patreon. We just gave out to eight lucky friends of the podcast Yep, the Friends with Benefits tab. They all just got a cajol three and four samples before the fragrance even released, and we threw a little something extra in there for each one of them.
Myke:Every single person got a little bonus. Yeah, so head on over. One listener got a big bonus and we'll talk about that on another episode. Yeah, so check us out there.
Ryan:We're trying to take care of y'all, we're trying to build the community and that's what helps run the show.
Myke:Yeah, we're about to open up chats. If you're Friends with Benefits, you're about to be in that chat room. Dog Mmm, and until next time, spreeeeet it up, damn you rock.
Ryan:You robbed me of my AS. Was it H-A-S-L age sex location? Yeah?
Myke:Chat room Could. Nobody wants any sort of aged sex with you, no matter the location, Whether it be in the shower smelling like Layton.
Ryan:Mmm. Oh God, all right, spray it up, y'all Spray it up.