What if you knew the secret behind legendary fragrances? Brace yourself as your aromatic aficionados and hosts, Myke and Ryan, uncover the scented secrets of Davidoff's Cool Water. Get ready to immerse yourself in a sensory expedition like no other as we navigate the aromatic labyrinth of this affordable fragrance that has a magnetic charm to a wide range of individuals. Join us in the playful banter, experience the thrill of ASMR, and behold our no-holds-barred reviews as we decode the chemical bomb opening to the unique dry down.
Just when you think we're done, we dive into our one-night stand review of Black Powder by JusBox, a Kurt Cobain-inspired grunge fragrance. Buckle up as we walk you through its intriguing opening notes, how it smells on the skin, and the contentious use of iconic figures to promote fragrances. And if that wasn't enough, we offer an all-access pass to our Patreon subscribers for an exclusive sensory overload. So, are you ready to hop on this fragrant ride with us?
What if you knew the secret behind legendary fragrances? Brace yourself as your aromatic aficionados and hosts, Myke and Ryan, uncover the scented secrets of Davidoff's Cool Water. Get ready to immerse yourself in a sensory expedition like no other as we navigate the aromatic labyrinth of this affordable fragrance that has a magnetic charm to a wide range of individuals. Join us in the playful banter, experience the thrill of ASMR, and behold our no-holds-barred reviews as we decode the chemical bomb opening to the unique dry down.
Just when you think we're done, we dive into our one-night stand review of Black Powder by JusBox, a Kurt Cobain-inspired grunge fragrance. Buckle up as we walk you through its intriguing opening notes, how it smells on the skin, and the contentious use of iconic figures to promote fragrances. And if that wasn't enough, we offer an all-access pass to our Patreon subscribers for an exclusive sensory overload. So, are you ready to hop on this fragrant ride with us?
Hello everybody, welcome to the Cologne Podcast.
Myke:I'm Mike and I'm Ryan and we're two best friends. We're smelling fragrances on a magical fragrant journey and we're giving you uneducated opinions that are not magical.
Ryan:Yes, and today, mike, he brought it, he bought it himself. It's called Cool Water. You heard of that 1988 classic.
Myke:From David Off. Oh gosh, david Off. Right, I bought it, I brought it, we're gonna smell it. Let me give you a Fragrantica review, ryan, please do, from the brilliant Fragrantica theologian Ssss, what's their name? Ssss, okay, we'll go with that. Opening is a chemical bomb, so it has to be applied at least 30 minutes before going out. When the dry down starts, I can clearly recognize the notes of Musk, lavender, tobacco, jasmine and Cedar. It has the familiar scent of a well maintained bookstore filled with brand new books, magazines, notebooks and pencils. After further dry down with tobacco and Musk, it transforms into a smell of mafia members during the 90s. So it opens up like a bookstore.
Myke:It opens up like a chemical bomb. So Ssss is saying we need to wait at least 30 minutes before we can really smell all the unique notes of tobacco. Jasmine Musk, can we all just stop being weird about you don't smell all that shit. Please Can we stop Stop acting like you do. You don't.
Ryan:Well, before we get into this beautiful chemical bomb, slash bookstore mud boss. Before we get into it, we need to do our one night stand review. We just did it with the one, the only, todd, who is no longer with us here today. I mean, he's still alive, but he's just not here. Thank God he's still editing in the basement, as he likes to call it, but we smell the fragrance by Juice Box called Black Powder, a Kurt Cobain, nirvana inspired grunge ass fragrance.
Myke:Yeah, if you didn't listen to that episode, it's one to listen to. Yeah, todd's, you ever wondered why he's not on the podcast and just editing? Go back and listen to that episode. We still love you, todd. And yes, and please just go ahead and hit that music. Yeah.
Ryan:One night stand review. You want to open it up and give him that nice, beautiful ASMR.
Myke:Well, first we're going to talk about black powder. You fucking idiot.
Ryan:Oh shit, yeah, I guess let's do that. You pointed it right at this fragrance. Okay, black powder. You know what? The opening is absolutely harsh. I don't think any of us liked it, but I kept telling these guys off air, while Todd had us at gunpoint, that it actually smelled really good on the skin and I really liked it Very woods and I disagreed.
Myke:I did not like it on the skin, I liked it on the card. Right, ryan.
Ryan:I'm coming back. Yes, yes, yes, mike, I think it's I do. I say skip it or sample. I can't remember Sample it. I still stick by that. I think it's a sample that could lead to some people buying.
Myke:Yeah, my one gripe is that they tend to lean on these huge iconic figures to peddle their sort of fragrances. And for that, now, how can you call them all? Meh, we hadn't even smelled all of them already putting a bad taste in my mouth because they're like. We don't have to lean on our own merit. We can lean on the fact that millions of people like these guys and maybe we'll just be able to milk the teats of the musical fans out there.
Ryan:Man he was milking in real life over here. Yeah Well, air nipples. I had to show you how it's done.
Myke:Okay, Just inspired by juice box. I read a few reviews and I kind of agree. I feel like that is. They should have been more nuanced and been, like you know, kind of hinted but not used the actual names. When you use the actual names, I feel like it's just not right.
Ryan:It doesn't feel right to me. For me I'm I kind of halfway disagree a little bit, because I think that fragrance actually fits what they're kind of alluding to. I feel like it is actually grungy, it's kind of dirty, it's like after the black powder has settled. I actually think it's a pretty decent fragrance, but the opening is absolutely harsh. I feel like it's like if you smoked a pack of cigarettes and try to hide it with some cool water.
Myke:I think they missed an opportunity of not adding a hint of teen spirit in there. What, what the hell would that be?
Ryan:Smells like teen spirit. Oh well, yeah, but I mean, like what would that smell? Like Teen?
Myke:spirit was a deodorant. There was a teen spirit deodorant. Wait, that's what the song is based on. The name came from. Somebody wrote on a wall Kurt smells like teen spirit. And then he made the song smells like teen spirit.
Ryan:Okay, do they still make that, because that would make for a great episode to like I want to smell that or some little side thing. You stick the gum on top of your coke, can Well I?
Myke:didn't want to sit here and clack all over the episode. God knows we're not paying Todd for overtime.
Ryan:So it's not going to take those out.
Myke:Either way, I was just trying to make a little cheeky. Smells like teen spirit. When we're talking about smells, fragrance, nirvana, that joke had to be in there somewhere. It was masterfully delivered, mike. Well, what you expect any less? Okay, I think we're good with this one. Let's just go ahead and nonchalantly slide our way into the scent of the day. David, off school water. And Ryan, you wanted me to just open this up. Yeah, get the ASMR. He's opening it up right now. There's a little puppy. When you talk into the mic like this, oh, that's another thing that ASMR people do, huh, oh yeah, they like whisper. Oh, this is there. I'll give you the price tag for later on when we do the price and trend. People make lots of money doing that. Oh, yes, sir, we have a 2.5 fluid ounce.
Ryan:If my calculations are correct, that should be about 75 ml. That's correct.
Myke:Also right here on the box, David off cool water. Oh the toilet.
Ryan:I'm ready, dude, okay.
Myke:And if you listen to our episode with Grant frag, dude 85, apparently this is the fragrance that started a long bloody war between Creed and everyone else. Really yeah, because from what he was saying, from the ghost perfume they copied individual to make original Santel.
Ryan:Holy shit, I mean keep going with your story. This just smells really good to me.
Myke:But they originally, I guess green Irish tweed was copied to make cool water. So, anyway, this is before green Irish tweed, though right, I think this was after green Irish tweed came out. I actually liked this a lot 1985 Green Irish tweet.
Ryan:Really, that's when they're saying that came out. Yeah, I don't fucking believe that shit. Dude, dude, I've been alive since 1982 and I swear to God, I swear to God, law dog, I did not. I didn't know that shit even existed. Talking about Creed in general, tell literally, how's this podcast two and a half years ago?
Myke:Yeah, and since you didn't know it existed, it surely must not have existed, Dude I have been hony about fragrances Since I was literally in the great school. Well, this came out when you were three, ryan, so you must have been so intelligent at the age of three to be looking up niche perfumery to know exactly when stuff came out.
Ryan:I just don't buy that story. As somebody that's got some truth to that, let us know, because I don't buy that story at all.
Myke:Green Irish tweet and this both have this kind of chewing-ness to it and maybe I need to go back and smell Green Irish tweet, but this smells pretty cool on the skin.
Ryan:It does. But I am going to have to say this card stock, this tester strip, this, whatever the fuck you want to call it. All right, so smells, so goddamn good, I mean it smells good, yeah, it does.
Myke:It almost smells like pine tree or something. It's got that kind of green tree vibe.
Ryan:What the hell have I never smelled? I mean, I remember walking by this and Dillard, as a young man, slightly after 1988, when this came out. It was by itself and I promise you I never saw a creed on the shelf. But I tell you what I saw, this shit, and I've walked past it a million times. I don't know what drove me to never want to smell it, because I used to, even as a kid. I would go up to the counter and I would love to smell all the fragrances. I never smelled this, this or juke, until we smelled that version of juke we got yeah, this is arguably way better than yope. Yeah, oh, yeah, for sure.
Myke:Juke, baby juke. I miss you, snazzy.
Ryan:I was listening to that one the other day he's the one where he's like and I came down to the lobby and the front desk lady went somebody smells good.
Myke:What a wild man. Come back to us, snazzy. Come back, this cool water is legit, dude. Yeah, I will arguably say I don't know that this is slept on, but there's no way. It's slept on, no way we got to get the parfum.
Ryan:I cannot stop smelling this card. It smells so damn good I'm just going to go ahead and put on my shirt.
Myke:They recently released this as a parfum, I think.
Ryan:Yeah, I remember that and we not too long ago. Did we get a sample of that, or?
Myke:no, I don't think we did. God it's got to be so cheap. We could just buy a freaking bottle of it, give it to the patreons.
Ryan:I will say the opening. I get what he's saying. It is definitely chemical. It's almost like you can't smell anything good at first at all.
Myke:Yeah, it's like hairspray, like Aquanet or something you kind of get that with the cheaper fragrances, though I mean I expect it.
Ryan:But my God, oh my God, the card stock keeps getting better. Dude the immediate dry down to whatever the zone is. Card stock right now is fucking good.
Myke:Holy shit, Are you picking up the lavender Tobacco musk? I don't pick up any of that shit, it just smells.
Ryan:does it smell like a green freshie?
Myke:Yes, exactly, I get almost that little burn that you get from, like the pine minty Christmas tree type smell.
Ryan:Yes, man God damn.
Myke:And I was really worried and we had talked about this because you were like, is this really an aquatic? And I was like the name is Cool Water Ryan. So initially I was really worried going into this but I knew all of the people that had claimed this smells like Greenhouse Tweed, which I don't really kind of categorize as an aquatic fragrance, so I wasn't too worried.
Ryan:Yeah, it's, it's incredible, smelling good. Well, speaking of water, and especially cool water, we pulled it up a few months back. We were about to do this episode and we didn't do it. You know us, everything's last minute guys. Yeah, we'll get right on that, pal yeah, and. But I remember us liking the commercial for it, and so I pull and pull it up again. We haven't seen it in a while, but it's a German David off Cool Water commercial.
Myke:Go ahead and give us a little bit more volume there, Todd.
Ryan:They say it's muggy. The boat's are in. It's muggy and heavy.
Myke:I'm so happy with my eggs and the people all said I'm this dude's stripping down naked.
Ryan:This is a boat, not the women. What?
Myke:Cool water for your weed. Is that what he said? I have no fucking idea.
Ryan:Why don't they make commercials like this anymore?
Myke:I'll tell you why People like us in it. I'm going. What is he doing? What is he?
Ryan:saying this is four minutes and 31 seconds.
Myke:We don't have to watch all that.
Ryan:We can watch all that.
Myke:Cool water boy. It's cool water time. Hey, mister, the ships are in.
Ryan:Cool water. All right, move out the way.
Myke:I'm going to take my shirt off to go outside and then there's like 30 seconds of footage of just like the outside of a house. It just seems like a pair of legs shot around the outside of a house. Like what is that Like, wait, this guy was at a shop. He gets naked, he swims. Now he's naked walking around the outside of a wrap around porch what's?
Ryan:going on. He told that dumbass kid hey, whenever you see the boats come in, just come up here and let me know. And he's like inside playing Sega or something.
Myke:Hey mister, the boats are in Cool water. Boy, cool water.
Ryan:I love this German. It's a German commercial, but it's like all American, like lyrics, whatever. That's why it's all like weed and all that other shit, oh yeah yeah, what a for your weed. I'm not going to lie, though. Real talk. I feel like this scent smells about as good as that guy's body looks, and that's I feel like I'm that guy right now.
Myke:It's freaking, chisel, you look amazing right now. You do too Well, I am swole Damn she had a taw.
Ryan:I'd let everybody know that. Huh, oh man.
Myke:I guess, yeah, David off it. It sounds like a German name, yeah.
Ryan:David off. It's probably you know what. Hey, look this up. Is it like a mixture of, like David Hasselhoff or something?
Myke:Is this like?
Ryan:really his shit, or something.
Myke:God, it's like Ryan, you associate. If you know one word or name that somehow links to what we're talking, you're like, oh, it's got to be that.
Ryan:Hey, what the hell. David off is based in Switzerland. What yeah, that's wild Parent company. You ready for this Creed?
Myke:Cody, oh my God, the old Stetson man himself. Ah, miss Cody, Poor man got killed off. His wife took everything.
Ryan:So it's. The Xeno David off group is a Swiss based family business that manufactures exclusive watches, writing instruments and leather goods for sophisticated clientele. In addition to prestige fragrances, I wear cognacs and cafes.
Myke:Wow, okay, so check this out. That sounds a lot like Mont Blanc. It does doesn't it?
Ryan:They're a little. Yeah, that's the right thing.
Myke:Is that why homeboy said pencils at the library as well, mont Blanc pencils perhaps? I love this part too.
Ryan:David off has committed itself to bring together the finest materials and ingredients the world has to offer from design, inspiration and craftsmanship. You can get cold water in the dollar general, probably yeah, I bet. But you know what that is legit a bad ass on fragrance.
Myke:Dude, I can't hate on it. This card is phenomenal.
Ryan:I'm shocked at how good this fucking fragrance is. Yeah.
Myke:Were you like turning into that stud over there? Hey, smells pretty good.
Ryan:I'm more like the boy hey Miss, hey Mike, hey, mike, hey. What's up Things? What a boy. Oh good, god Cue the news, anchor stuff there. Todd Price what did I pay, ryan? Mike paid $16 and 19 cents at Drug Emporium. What an odd number.
Myke:1619 is a good year 75 mil for that by the way.
Ryan:Yeah, and the trend, ladies and gentlemen, it's actually kind of, you know, kind of mid. Oh yeah, yeah, it's not, it's not up there like it used to be.
Myke:The ships aren't in yet. No, the boats aren't in yet. Yeah, okay.
Ryan:Mike, we've smelled the fragrance. We've watched the porn commercial pretty much. What did it? Yeah, pretty much. After smelling it, no, seeing the commercial for your own eyes. And now you know the price and the trend. What kind of individual would be wearing such an elegant fragrance as this?
Myke:45 and up. Yeah, man on a budget, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or somebody who just appreciates fine fragrances at a decent price.
Ryan:Now, is this man chiseled? Is he caught diesel like the guy in the video? No, or is he? You know he's selling cars.
Myke:I think somebody chiseled Chiseled huh Would not be wearing this.
Ryan:Really Not initially the person I get. Honestly, you ready for this? I'm ready. Okay, todd, cue the dream sequence-y type music and then also add a little bit of Italian restaurant music. Okay, here we go. I may have been wrong. One out, add some music, though. Okay, Cut, don't do that music. Find a different style of music. I don't know what's going to fit it, but find it. And here we go. It's 1955. He's in charge of an ad agency. Oh, interesting. He's wearing a nice business suit and back then they were big and baggy. He has a five o'clock shadow. Looks like he wrote coffee grums on his absolutely freakishly chiseled chin. Beautiful jawline, absolutely impeccable. Men go wet looking at him. I'm getting there. I feel like it's that type of person.
Myke:It's just they're baller, they're that mad man, oh yeah, madison Avenue, sort of guy.
Myke:Very loud very in your face, the Don Draper's of the world. Fuck yeah, it smells badass. I'm not going to lie. I mean it did come out in 1988. So you're about three decades shy of where you're trying to hit, but I mean the fragrance is incredible. If I think about who is probably wearing it, it's probably more you know somebody who's just the old faithful been wearing it for forever. Yeah, didn't pick it up in the 80s because they weren't that hip. Yes, they had to be out a while and everybody had to be fawning over it and eventually it hit that price point where they could consider actually purchasing it and then it got cheap.
Ryan:And he was like I'm buying all the bottles.
Myke:Yeah, yeah, he was like 75 mil, give me a 150.
Ryan:You know, speaking of the bottle, let's touch on that first thing. We never talk about bottles rarely on here, but we got one, so why not? I actually like it. It's very simple Love that dark, kind of like teal, blue, aquatic with the black cap.
Myke:Yeah, it doesn't feel too cheap.
Ryan:Honestly, it really doesn't, and you know we also should touch on the perfumer for this.
Myke:I think I'm going to go ham on this. Real quick, go ahead.
Ryan:I just did so. The perfumer for this is none other than Pierre Bourdain.
Myke:Oh Pierre, oh Pierre, that initial spray is fucking rough, pierre, yeah.
Ryan:It's brutal. The opening is brutal, but I love it. After that, pierre was born in 1946, and Perry? Initially he pursued a degree in political science but ultimately decided to follow his passion for perfumery. In 1971, bourdain met the legendary perfumer Edmund Ronitska. Oh yeah, you know who? That is that freaking legend. You know who that is no Well, on the south of France. This faithful encounter inspired him to train as a perfumer for five years at the Rue Ingrasse, where he oh wait, there's a more button studied under the tutelage of Ronitsky and John Carls. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. Just let me have a look at the rest of the talk. I'm going to have to do a little bit of extra. I just want to give a little bit about it.
Myke:But this guy has perfumed quite a bit of popular fragrances.
Ryan:Hit me with the Hall of Fame fragrances. I'm going to sort it out by popularity and we're just going to go from the tippity-top. David off cool water. Creed green iris, tweed, oh oh oh, dior, dolce vita, mont Blanc, individual, creed, silver mountain water Is that you or me? That's you? You're gonna call their dick mouth? Oh, you, bitch, clicked them. Yeah yeah, creed, silver Mountain water. David off cool water, but it looks like it's like in a bottle, I don't know. He also made damn, he is this motherfucker made Kuros dog, wow, e S A Laurent. He made Malyseum Imperial. He made Frederick Mall Iris whatever the word that is and French lover, a Ralphie Dude. This guy, he be doing things. He's made some hits.
Myke:Interesting that it's the perfumer of this and Green Irish tweed.
Ryan:Yeah, it's. It's almost as if there may be conspiracy as a foot in the community sometimes.
Myke:Well then it also makes me wonder Now I'm not questioning Grant because he is a fragrance scholar, yes, but why would they feel like David off copied Green Irish Tweed? Yeah, it's the same perfume, it exactly that's a bingo.
Ryan:And yeah, damn man, I can't believe Grant is Tweed still saying it was launched in 1985.
Myke:Oh but you know what it makes sense, though. Now Hold on. Green Irish Tweed comes out. A few years later, he basically sells the same recipe to David off, and then he does individual from on Blanc, and they go we're going after this guy, we're going to fuck you, we're going to make original Santel. And that's exactly what they did. They fucked him over.
Ryan:God damn, this shit goes all the way to the top. That's not the tippy top, god man fragrance is so fucking wild. I still in calling bullshit on a 1985 Creed release. I'm just calling it dude, really Dude yeah, dude, they've been around.
Myke:There were decades before that. I know they're making kings. Yeah, not it. No, not even that, like they made it for like fifties and sixties movie stars. Ok, let me look up something. Keep what's. There was one, the Boide Portugal or whatever. I think it's like a Cary Grant fragrance or something like that. Really, yeah yeah. Or Frank Sinatra some, I don't know, you know, but it's, it's an old school cat.
Ryan:I was just trying to find some information on this Creed thing, but apparently they they need to go in far back, dude. Apparently they made their fragrances public in the seventies, where you could actually, I guess the public could actually get some Damn dude. This shit be smelling good though. Ok, skip it, sample it or buy it.
Myke:What are you going to do, Ryan?
Ryan:Why are we like hulking out I?
Myke:don't know, we're in a mood today. Did you have a big lunch or something? I had a bowl of fruit loops, dude. That was it. How's it I had?
Ryan:I had oatmeal for breakfast. I haven't had like really real substance today. Wow, I had.
Myke:Mexican food. And then I made myself a protein shake because I'm getting swole.
Ryan:And he is definitely trying to live that swole life over here. Yeah, you got to hear he's got a jug of milk he's drinking out of and look, Ryan, I just want us to be swolemates.
Myke:I'm getting seventies big.
Ryan:Man, it's amazing how your life flashes for your eyes. When Todd's got a gun pointed at you.
Myke:That's right.
Ryan:Um, this is a certifiable lock of the century. Stone cold pick. That's an easy buy. Yeah, sixteen dollars for that. I'm buying that so quick to make your goddamn head spin.
Myke:I wonder if your dad would wear this. He would love this shit man. You should take it home to him tonight and let him try it out and bring it back. That'll be the one I stand review. Add a little bit of that, papa Ryan, in there.
Ryan:Man, god damn. Yeah, that's a buy, that's it. That might be one of the easiest buys we've had on here. Oh yeah, what do you think? Is there a skip?
Myke:sample by it's a buy. Yeah, I didn't think that I'd be a fan of it because Greenhouse Tweed kind of turned me off. There's one time, Ryan, when I had a few hundos in my pocket and I went to drug and pour him because I knew they had a decent price on Greenhouse Tweed. Yeah, and I went in there, sprayed it on the skin. I was tempted to buy it and then I smelled it and I was like no, but this is less twingey than that. Shockingly enough.
Ryan:This does smell like it, though Like really close, Really really close. Wow man, I'm just like shocked right now that that is a surprisingly good fragrance, One of the better cards.
Myke:I've smelled Absolutely Tester strip on the tester strip. It is fan Freakin' Tastic.
Ryan:Is it like you wear this? When you're like wearing regular clothes, are you dressing up?
Myke:We didn't really touch. Yeah, man, this is your typical T-shirt and, jean, you know.
Ryan:Oh, so you think it's like he just got out of the shower, your lounge and you?
Myke:saw the commercial. The guy wouldn't even hardly wear clothes.
Ryan:Let me tell you something, ladies and gentlemen if you haven't subscribed to our Patreon, you're done, fucked up, you're missing out, you really are. We are going hand me over there, dude, yeah.
Myke:Episodes going out custom episodes that they're getting to vote on they're going out. We are giving them a subscriber only episode every single week.
Ryan:And they're also getting a free bottle. Actually, we're giving away two this month. Why don't we give this away too? I was going with my dad try it.
Myke:Well, you dad, you know what. We're giving it away to Ryan Sr. Your dad can have that. No, no, no, no, I think. No, no, no, no, tell him it's from me. Hey, you're early.
Ryan:Christmas. I like him too. How's Mark doing? I got to hear that, oh, he's doing pretty good.
Myke:I have a good time, I like to give him a hard time.
Ryan:He's very old school, mike loves that. So if you haven't subscribed over there, you need to go. We're not bullshitting here.
Myke:We're hitting it hard over there. There's a ton of bottles about to go out. Oh my God. I mean, if I look at our, we've got a little cabinet of full bottles that we're going to be giving away. It's pretty full.
Ryan:It is really full. We love you guys. Go check us out at Patreon. You will not be let down. It's only $6 a month. Yeah, for the top tier.
Myke:And if you haven't subbed, as the time of this recording nine unreleased episodes for you to listen to, it's a lot and probably by the time this airs, it'll be more than that.
Ryan:Yes, and spray it up y'all.