Ever find yourself spinning your wheels, getting nowhere? You're not alone. Join me, Kristi Falany, your guide on this voyage of self-discovery, as we explore the all-too-familiar terrain of feeling stuck. Let's unearth the roots of this emotional standstill together, often sprouting from an over-zealous gaze into the uncertain future or an unwavering grip on the past. In our heart-to-heart, I'll share how embracing gratitude can be your compass, leading you away from the quagmire of stagnation and back onto the path of the vibrant life that's waiting for you, right here, right now.
Your journey of self-awareness doesn't have to be a solo expedition. That's why in this transformative discussion, I extend an invitation for a 'rediscover you' call that could be the gentle nudge you need. We'll talk about how to nurture calmness within your nervous system and how to gain mental clarity. Together, let's ignite that dormant passion for life, as I equip you with the same tools I offer my clients, paving the way for a present and engaged existence. Your story is ongoing, and it's time to align your narrative with the present chapter - where you truly belong.
Thanks for listening. Follow me in Facebook and Instagram.
Ever find yourself spinning your wheels, getting nowhere? You're not alone. Join me, Kristi Falany, your guide on this voyage of self-discovery, as we explore the all-too-familiar terrain of feeling stuck. Let's unearth the roots of this emotional standstill together, often sprouting from an over-zealous gaze into the uncertain future or an unwavering grip on the past. In our heart-to-heart, I'll share how embracing gratitude can be your compass, leading you away from the quagmire of stagnation and back onto the path of the vibrant life that's waiting for you, right here, right now.
Your journey of self-awareness doesn't have to be a solo expedition. That's why in this transformative discussion, I extend an invitation for a 'rediscover you' call that could be the gentle nudge you need. We'll talk about how to nurture calmness within your nervous system and how to gain mental clarity. Together, let's ignite that dormant passion for life, as I equip you with the same tools I offer my clients, paving the way for a present and engaged existence. Your story is ongoing, and it's time to align your narrative with the present chapter - where you truly belong.
Thanks for listening. Follow me in Facebook and Instagram.
Hi, I am Kristy Ballard Fellini. I am a certified life coach who found herself at 42, freshly divorced kids off to college, and having never dated in my adult life. I was starting in the middle. If you haven't yet hit, start on your middle time in life, let's do it together. Let the journey begin. Hello, hello. My friends, I am learning something new today and I challenge you Try to learn something new every day.
Speaker 1:At the end of the month, I am going to be launching my stress relief kit, which I am super, super excited about, and one of the best ways of relieving stress and taking care of your brain is to learn something new every day. So what is it that I'm learning today? I am actually recording my podcast in a different modality. Today, I am recording my podcast through Zoom. A couple of things came up in my brain. I don't know why, but I was automatically thinking well, you're going to be sitting there looking at yourself on the screen as you're talking and you're going to be judging yourself, but hey, guess what? I don't even have to have the camera on, so I'm super psyched about that. Now, why am I recording my podcast through Zoom rather than the modality that I normally do, which is audacity, because there's a lot going on around me. My neighbor I don't know why, jk, but he does not keep up with my work schedule, and so he is outside mowing the lawn right, and there's some other things going on in the house. My husband is home, he is cleaning out the dishwasher, he's putting away laundry, he's doing some things around the house, and so I have heard that, zoom, is this like a magical little thing that helps you to cut out all of the background noise, and so I am super excited to see how this comes out.
Speaker 1:Okay, so learn something new every day to keep your mind agile, to help stave away the stress, alrighty, okay, so here is what I want to talk to you about today, and what I hear from my clients is that they have this feeling inside of them, as if they are stuck, like they have no momentum going, that they're having a hard time cultivating motivation, they're having a hard time creating new things, new possibilities for themselves, that they aren't even able to see new possibilities, and what this feels like for them is that they are just stuck, that they are doing their day to day things and it's becoming a mundane habit. They're having a hard time finding things that they're excited about, and that they just feel stuck or they feel frozen where they are at, and so what I want to make you more aware of is that there is a very huge possibility that your brain is actually not stuck. I'd be willing to bet that all of the thoughts are still happening. Right, all of the thoughts, all of the ideas are still happening. But what I want you to ask yourself is am I trying to think too far into the future and I am seeing impossibility, or I am in fear of the unknown? Therefore I am stuck? Or are you noticing that your thoughts and ideas go into the past and so you are feeling like you are having a hard time seeing the present because you are feeling like you are focusing on the past, and so, when you say I am stuck, I want you to really be conscientious of where your thoughts actually are. So are you thinking too far into the future and it's causing you to be anxious, it's causing you to worry, it's causing you to feel fear because you really don't know what is available for you in the future, or the fear of the unknown is just too great, or are you having some regrets of the past some ideas, some things that you wanted to accomplish but you didn't get to them, or some circumstances that happened in your life that caused you pain, and so you are struggling because, or you are having that feeling of being stuck, because your thoughts are being generated from your past Okay, so oftentimes I find that when my clients tell me that they're stuck, these are the two thought processes that are actually happening.
Speaker 1:They're either thinking too far into the future and having that fear of the unknown, or they feel like their thought process and their mind keeps going back to events of the past, and so I want to talk to you about that today. Okay, so, if you're having that feeling of being stuck, take an internal audit of where your thoughts actually are, because here's the problem with thinking too far into the future Okay, the majority of the time, this comes from a place of fear, fear of the unknown, fear of what your next step might be, and what this ends up happening creating for you is actually feelings of anxiety and feelings of overwhelm, because constantly worrying about the future can lead you to stress and to anxiety, and it makes it difficult to enjoy what it is that you actually have in front of you, okay. It distracts you from present opportunities and by constantly looking ahead, you may actually be missing out on opportunities and experiences that are available to you right now. Looking too far into the future, it actually sets unrealistic expectations. That's why you're feeling the fear. That's why you're afraid of the unknown. You're placing too much emphasis, maybe, on future goals. You're placing too much emphasis on unrealistic expectations. This will ultimately lead to disappointment and to frustration, okay, and it also completely undermines gratitude. Okay. So focusing solely on the future and future aspirations can cause us to overlook the blessings and the achievements that you currently have. It will lead you to a thought process of lack, and I always say to my clients that the easiest way to get out of a negative mindset if you notice that you are having that flow of negative thoughts, the easiest way to jump out of that negative mindset is to go into a gratitude practice. And so if you find that you are focusing too far into the future, you are actually not being grateful for the things that you have in the present.
Speaker 1:Okay, so thinking too far into the future can cause you to have that feeling of fear of the unknown, or overwhelming feeling in your body, causing anxiousness, causing overwhelm. So, when you are noticing that you are having that feeling of being stuck, or you are noticing anxiousness and overwhelm, I would encourage you to again think about the thoughts that you're thinking, and are you trying to think too far into the future? And possibly that is what is causing you to feel that anxiousness and that overwhelm. All right, so let's talk about the flip side, okay? Because again, there are two thought processes that can cause us to feel stuck either we're trying to think too far into the future or we are thinking thoughts from the past, and so, when your thought processes are staying into the past, what is actually happening is that it could cause you to have feelings of regret or feelings of resentment. So, constantly having those thoughts of the past, of, maybe mistakes that you made or maybe miss opportunities, this type of thinking can lead you to feelings of regret, resentment, and what it actually does is it prevents you from your own personal growth.
Speaker 1:And the other thing that can happen is that, when you're thinking in the past, an opportunity for forgiveness or for acceptance is actually blocked, okay, so holding on to the past can make it more challenging for you to forgive others as well as yourself, and it prevents us from actually moving forward and finding the piece that we want. Okay, it also distorts our perception of reality. It distorts our perception of what is actually happening in the now and what happens in that distorted reality. If we're living in the past and we're constantly bringing up memories of the past, we're relying heavily on our past experiences. What actually happens is that it clouds our judgment and it prevents us from seeing things as they truly are in the present. Okay, and the biggest thing that staying in the past past thinking does for you is that it prevents your learning and growth. So, while reflecting on the past can be valuable in some situations, dwelling on it excessively can prevent us from embracing new experiences and new opportunities, and it definitely prevents our growth.
Speaker 1:So what do we do about this? How do we keep our mindset from going too far into the future and how do we keep our mindset from going too far into the past? Because neither of those are productive for our overall health, and each of those actually has us feeling as if we are in a state of being stuck, and so what I would encourage you to do is be completely aware of when that is happening, when you're noticing anxious feelings pop up. When you're noticing overwhelm, are you trying to think too far into the future? Or if you notice a sense of sadness in your thought process or processes, or sense of regret in your thought process, are you weighing too heavily into your past? What I would encourage you to do is, when you find yourself in either of those headspaces, always do what you can to come back to the present. Okay, because I promise you that both of those things are going to have some sort of activation within your body. Whether it be anxiousness, overwhelm, feelings of regret, sadness, depression, those two types of thinking are going to activate some sort of activation inside of your body. And so, when you are in the present, when you are in the space that you are in now, you have the opportunity to bring your body, your nervous system, back to a calm center.
Speaker 1:Okay, and what happens when you are staying in the present? It cultivates this mindfulness. It cultivates this awareness. Being present allows us to fully engage with all of our surroundings and all of the experiences in the now. It actually fosters a deeper sense of mindfulness and awareness. It enhances your overall well-being. So by focusing on the present, you can reduce your stress and your anxiousness, you can increase your sense of contentment. You can improve your overall well-being. Staying in the present actually empowers you to take mindful action, which is completely opposite of the feeling of being stuck when you are living in the present. It empowers you to take actions towards your goals and towards your aspirations. When you are staying present, it gives you the opportunity to come up with new ideas, new things that you want to create in your life, and it helps you do all of this without that feeling of overwhelm that uncertainty and past regrets will have for you. The biggest thing I know that you're going to want to perk up your ears on this the biggest thing is that it helps you to strengthen your relationships. Staying in the present and being fully present in all of your interactions with others helps you to create deeper connections. It helps you to strengthen the relationships, which is actually going to lead you to greater fulfillment and greater happiness in the relationships that I know that you want in your life.
Speaker 1:So I encourage you again be aware of what is going on in your brain. When you notice that you are trying to think too far into the future, it's having you stuck in fear, in overwhelm, because of the unknown, or you notice that you are staying in thoughts of the past. It's causing you sadness, it's causing you to feel regret. Come back to the present to move swiftly from those thoughts of negativity. Sit down and do a quick gratitude practice. What are three to five things that I have in my life, in the present, that I can be grateful for? You guys, the effects of this awareness can be so amazing, and it can be so life changing for you.
Speaker 1:I know that the majority of the women that I work with say that they struggle in the relationships that they want in their lives, that they don't have the connection that they want in their lives. I hear from them that they feel like they are in stagnation, that they're unable to even think about goals that they want for themselves because they're struggling with their own motivation, and so I would encourage you to think about where the majority of your thoughts actually are. Are you too far into the future or are you staying stuck in the past? Always, always, always. Do what you can to come back to present.
Speaker 1:If this is something that you struggle with, I would love to get on a rediscover you call, because awareness of how you are thinking is going to help you to rediscover who it is that you were meant to be in this season of life. And so if you are having that feeling of being stuck, or you are discovering in your awareness practice that you tend to be too far in the future or you tend to be stuck in the past, getting on this rediscover, you call. I can help you with the tools that I share with my own clients to help you come back to the present, to bring your nervous system back to a calm center, so that you can decide what is the next best step. All right, so if you resonated all with any of the information that I talked to you about today, I would encourage you reach out to me. We can connect on either Facebook or Instagram, or reach out to me through my webpage, wwwchristiefelenecoachingcom.
Speaker 1:You guys have an amazing day. Think about things that you are grateful for and conscientiously stay in the present. I look forward to hearing you next time. Who is your life coach? I would love the opportunity to work with you as you are rediscovering the woman you were meant to be. Visit ChristyBallardFelenecom for more information on how we can work together to ignite that passionate, enthusiastic woman who may have been tucked away for some time. Let's start in the middle together bathOoh.