Chaos Monster
Archie and Zara are the most chaotic people that they themselves have ever met. Join them as they give all kinds of unhinged advice and share their hot takes on everything from mental health, to politics, to pop culture, and way more (hopefully some conspiracy theories along the way). If you love chaos, this is your moment: RISE UP, CHAOS MONSTERS.
Episodes
38 episodes
Midnights Part 3 (aka The Glitch)
We think there's been a glitch (or two or five) in this third installment of our Midnights review. Listen as we try to navigate brief interruptions and slight malfunctions!Plus: Archie explains Paris word for word.
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Season 4
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Episode 6
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1:19:48
Midnights Part 2
In this highly anticipated follow-up, Archie and Zara discuss three more songs from Midnights! Also included: Mexican food, villains, and panties. Stay tuned for one more installment (part 3) in the series, coming to you ASAP. ...
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52:26
Taylor Swift's MIDNIGHTS Part 1
Archie and Zara discuss the first half of Taylor's newest album, friendship, and revenge. Listen to hear our rankings so we can fight about them!
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Season 4
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Episode 3
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1:16:36
Jenette McCurdy: I'm Glad My Mom Died
Archie and Zara are joined by podcast BFF Jessica Zaleski to discuss Jenette McCurdy's best-selling, highly controversial novel I'm Glad My Mom Died.
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Season 4
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Episode 2
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48:23
Chris Medina: Psychic Medium
For our first episode of the new season, we talked with wildly accurate psychic and medium Chris Medina, who told us harsh truths and delivered eerie albeit comforting messages (from beyond?)
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Season 4
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Episode 1
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1:22:45
The Game (with Archie and Zara)
Archie and Zara play a game, but the game has no name...and no rules. Which makes you wonder, is it actually even a game, or just a conversation?
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Season 3
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Episode 11
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47:21
Astrology With Ally Part 1
Archie and Zara are joined by comedian, writer, actress, and overall delightful human being, Ally Weinhold, to discuss something Zara knows nothing about: Astrology. Ally can be found on IG and TIKTOK @notallinfluencers--go follow ...
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Season 3
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Episode 10
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1:17:18
Taylor Swift's Ex Boyfriends Part 2
In which Archie admits to not liking Alice In Wonderland, as well as writing most of our reviews that refer to him as "hot" or "a good kisser." Listen to hear our final reviews and rankings of Little Miss Swift's long list of ex ...
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Season 3
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Episode 9
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1:10:57
Taylor Swift's Exes PART 1
Archie and Zara discuss what is on EVERYBODY'S minds lately: Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends. Bonuses include: the girl who made the mistake of attacking Holy Swift, fuck boys vs. hopeless romantics, and a legal battle with DC comics....
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Season 3
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Episode 8
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1:04:01
Pure Chaos With Mark Lipson
This episode is more chaotic than usual, which means we did a good job.The thing is, it features Zara's dad, who is a match for Archie when it comes to intellectual-adjacent tangents and astrological aptitude. So go ahead a...
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Season 3
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Episode 7
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58:43
Drag Queens With Puff and Dalt
Archie and Zara are joined by drag queens Puff the Magic Drag Queen and Dalt Flowers who mostly use the time to educate Zara on all things drag, despite the fact that she lives in West Hollywood. In addition to the history and poli...
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Season 3
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Episode 6
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53:43
The Depressive Episode
This time around, Archie and Zara are joined by Zara's sister, Natasha, to discuss depression, eating disorders, ADD, OCD, panic, death, and trauma. The fun stuff, mostly.As always, you'll get 1.Wallmart 2.The boy from...
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Season 3
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Episode 5
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1:26:20
OnlyFans With Kaleb Kevins
*For a couple of very important visuals, go to Instagram: @chaosmonsterpodcast* Archie and Zara are joined by renaissance man, Kaleb, to discuss his adventures as a performer on Only Fans. Inevitably, they often get ...
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Season 3
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Episode 4
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1:14:28
Slut, Skank, and Other Compliments
In this cursed episode, Archie and Zara talk about what it means to be a slut, celebrate all kinds of debauchery, and give listeners permission to make mistakes, take [safe] chances, and leave their high school years in the past. W...
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Season 3
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Episode 3
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1:14:51
That's Not Your Friend
Join us (Archie and Zara) as we explore what it means to be a friend, and when you know to get rid of the losers who don't deserve you. Zara's brilliant advice for making new friends: get a dog.Archie's brilliant advice for mak...
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1:06:58
Your Ex is Trash
Join us, Archie and Zara, as we rebrand as CHAOS MONSTER!Experiments in sobriety, sluttiness, and and getting the f*ck over your loser ex. What more could you possibly want from us?Are we qualified to give you advice? Eh, maybe....
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Season 3
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Episode 1
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54:14
S2 E12: Little Mix
Archie and Zara are joined by Choreo and Cosplay Queen Tay BoBo to discuss England's second best girl group... LITTLE MIX!Cancel culture, slut shaming, black fishing, and cyber bulling...this episode is FUN.PLUS•A corset mad...
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Season 2
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Episode 12
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1:12:13
S2 E11 Miley Cyrus
Today, Archie and Zara are joined by writer NATHANAEL to discuss the woman Archie worships and serves...Miley Destiny Hope Cyrus! Buckle up for a wild (and raunchy) ride ranging from educational pop songs about rollercoasters and p...
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Season 2
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Episode 11
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1:22:48
S2 E10: Kristen Stewart
Archie and Zara are joined by actress and writer, Emily Robinson, to discuss vampire queen and gay icon Kristen Stewart. Listen as they cover her roles from Bella to Princess Diana, speculate what she'd be like playing a Batman villain, and hyp...
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Season 2
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Episode 10
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57:27
S2 E9: Lana Del Rey
Archie and Zara are joined by Emmy nominated podcaster, Grant Rutter, to discuss the only It Girl Zara really cares about and the only one Archie has yet to embrace (aside from Michelle Trachtenberg)...LANA DEL REY!Listen as Zara audibl...
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Season 2
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Episode 9
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1:14:48
S2 E8: Sarah Michelle Gellar
Archie and Zara are joined by podcaster Guillermo Flores to discuss the only vampire slayer that ever mattered, Sarah Michelle Gellar. Kicking ass in red leather pants, snorting coke out of an adorable little cross necklace, gettin...
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Season 2
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Episode 8
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1:09:22
S2 E7: The Spice Girls
Archie and Zara are joined by comedian/podcaster/author/former rock DJ, Ken Napzok to discuss The Spice Girls! Yes, that's right, all FIVE Spice Girls. Spice bus! Elton John! Consent! That time Ginger left the band! All of this wa...
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Season 2
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Episode 7
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1:05:44
S2 E6: Mary-Kate Olsen Part 2
Archie and Zara are joined by Holy Swift Podcast host Jessica Zaleski for a SECOND TIME to talk even more about Mary-Kate Olsen. Why not Ashley, you ask? Well she didn't have bowls of cigarettes at her wedding and she wasn't allegedly dating He...
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Season 2
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Episode 6
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1:12:03
S2 E5: Ashley Tisdale
Archie and Zara are joined by TikTok superstar Josiah Gorham to discuss singer/actress/bad bitch Ashley Tisdale. Tangents include: Aaron Carter's penis, the Love Simon show on Hulu (which Archie did not see), and the fact that Archie prefers
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1:03:05
S2 E4: Katie Holmes
Archie and Zara are joined by Best of Friends Podcast host Erin Mallory Long to discuss the LONG and winding career of Katie Holmes. From tomboy to topless and dead in a lake, from high SAT scores to escaping the cult of Scientology, here's eve...
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Season 2
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Episode 4
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1:12:50