The Crackin' Backs Podcast

Tragedy's Call: Rebuilding after losing EVERYTHING!- Mason Sawyer

January 14, 2024 Dr. Terry Weyman and Dr. Spencer Baron
The Crackin' Backs Podcast
Tragedy's Call: Rebuilding after losing EVERYTHING!- Mason Sawyer
Show Notes Transcript

In this gripping episode of the Crackin' Backs Podcast, we bring to you the heart-rending story of Mason Sawyer, a man who once had a life that many would envy, only to have it turned upside down in an instant. Mason, a successful basketball coach, married to his childhood sweetheart, and father to three amazing kids, faced the unimaginable when a tragic phone call in 2021 informed him of a catastrophic multicar accident. This accident claimed the lives of his beloved wife, two of his children, his brother, and his nephew. The sole beacon of hope in this darkness was his middle son, Blue, who miraculously survived.

As Mason grapples with this life-altering loss, he finds a renewed sense of purpose in caring for Blue, his only remaining family member. This episode delves deep into Mason's journey through the abyss of grief and his struggle to forge a path forward. He opens up about the mental and emotional challenges of adjusting to a new reality while being a pillar of strength for his son.

Moreover, Mason discusses the philosophy behind his podcast, The 10/Ninety. This concept, centered on the belief that 10% of our life is determined by what happens to us and 90% by how we respond to these events, has been Mason's guiding light through his darkest times. He shares, in his podcast, how this principle has helped him cope with his loss and offers insights into how it can be a tool for others facing their own tragedies.

This episode of the Crackin' Backs Podcast is not just a story of loss and grief; it's a powerful narrative about resilience, hope, and finding meaning in the wake of tragedy. Join us as we explore Mason's journey, a testament to the strength of the human spirit and the power of love and perseverance in the face of unimaginable hardship.

We are two sports chiropractors, seeking knowledge from some of the best resources in the world of health. From our perspective, health is more than just “Crackin Backs” but a deep dive into physical, mental, and nutritional well-being philosophies.

Join us as we talk to some of the greatest minds and discover some of the most incredible gems you can use to maintain a higher level of health. Crackin Backs Podcast

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Welcome to the cracking backs podcast where resilience meets reality. In today's heartstopping episode, we delve into a story that's almost too harrowing to believe. Imagine just for a moment receiving that one phone call that shatters your world. That is exactly what happened to Mason Sawyer in 2021. A catastrophic multi car accident claimed the lives of his entire world is cherished wife, two precious children, his brother and his nephew. How does one even begin to navigate the aftermath of such an unthinkable tragedy? Mason's journey is not just about loss, it's about finding a way to move forward when everything seems lost. His story is one of unimaginable pain but also have incredible resilience and hope. Today, me since shares with us how his life altering event reshaped his perspective on life, and how his harrowing experience can lead a path for others struggling to find their way after their own personal tragedies. Brace yourselves for an episode that will not only move you, but might just change the way you view the strength of the human spirit.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

All right, all right. Mason Sawyer, you know, it's so nice to actually put a face to a name. As we know, as we're talking off air, our beautiful loving friend Garrett L. George, is whenever he sends a connection to me, I get nervous, and weird. And it's like, here's a name, you got to talk to him. Here's a phone number. And good luck. And the fact that they've always worked out, it just shows you what kind of guy that man is that he deals with his heart. And anybody that asks, he asked me to talk to you, I always will. But so it's nice to actually put a face to an email. And thank you for so much for showing up, ma'am.

Unknown:

No, thanks for having me. And Garrett. George is the man and Yeah, he does the same thing to me, man, you gotta have this guy. He's, he's always thinking about someone other than

Dr. Terry Weyman:

always. And I think that's what this show is all about, think what you just said, thinking about others other than yourself. And so thank you for coming on. And yeah, but just to connect the audience with who you are. Some may have known knowing your name, others will not. And I think that people that don't know your name, are the people that have to hear about your name. Because those are the people that have faced tragedy, that are in their cave, in their, in their dark room, in their basement, or in their garage, or wherever. And in the past few years, there are a lot of people out there that have faced tragedy, whether it's death, or loss of job or whatever, their identity, and they don't know how to cope. And you face immense personal tragedy to the point where I even told my my partner to shave his arm hairs because they're getting tired of standing up. You've, you've you've and you've lost your partner has always his arms or hairs always standing up and all that. So to get back on track, you lost basically your entire family and to the 21. And I'm sorry that I know you talk about this. But even though it's hard, how did this experience and can you tell us about the story and how this experience influenced your perspective on life as it is now?

Unknown:

Yeah, I think I think what how much time do we

Dr. Terry Weyman:

start? Yeah. I

Unknown:

I love basketball growing up. That was like my thing. And I was pretty good basketball player. I got a couple offers to play college ball. In high school though. I met this girl. And like I thought girls were like, the enemy to basketball like a distraction. Don't like stay away from the girls in high school. I wanted to play college basketball. But I couldn't help it. I met this girl named Courtney. And she was just like, the coolest person and we dated and went to every school dance together. And our senior year. We were voted by our peers to I think we won the award, most likely to marry your high school sweetheart. Which we did ended up getting married. So I mean, I'm at court and I was 15. And just like most down to earth, let me just give you a quick example. So I save up all my money to take Courtney out for her 16th birthday. I'm a 16 year old kid so all my money I have like 140 bucks problem. It's all I have. But like, I want to go pick up Courtney and be like, Hey, we can go anywhere you want for your birthday like anywhere. So like steak dinner, seafood, like whatever I got covered. And she's like, how about like, KFC? We'll go to KFC. I'm like, What do you like? No, no. Anyway, she's like, No, they have good$5 bowls. They're like, let's go to KFC. And like, her birthday, she wanted to play kickball with the family. That's just who she was. She's just like, I don't know. We just got along so good. So my senior year in high school, I get a scholarship. Me and Courtney go to Southern Utah. So I'm playing college basketball. Courtney and I are married. Courtney is doing the nursing program at Utah tech, where I played. And then we started to have kids like I always wanted to be a dad like that was my goal in life is to be a good dad. And I think it's because I was the youngest of five kids growing up and had all these nieces and nephews wandering around. I'm not sure but I just really wanted to be a dad. So we started having kids. And my senior year of college basketball. We had our first son Reagan's, and then I finished up playing college basketball. And then I go back up north, and I get the head coaching job at my old high school. So now I'm coaching high school basketball coordinators and nurse in our hometown where we went to high school. We have two more kids. We have another boy named Blue, and a daughter named Frankie. I know I have weird names for my kids. Leave me alone. I have three kids and do like I don't really know how I got the perspective. I think it was from my dad because I remember being a little kid and I wanted to go, I'd shoot hoops every night. My dad would rebound for me. And I remember one night. I don't even know why we're on the topic. But my dad like looked at me. And he said mace I think I'm the richest guy in the world. Because I have your mom and I have you and I have kids. He's like, I think I'm the richest, luckiest guy in the world. We're like middle income, like just whatever he was a therapist like we were getting by. But like, that's just kinda like, that's the perspective I had as a young child. And so now I have Courtney was high school and these three kids like it was everything I wanted. And I remember telling my dad before the car accident, like just before the car accident, I told my dad I said, Dad, I think I'm the happiest, richest guy in the world. And so that's just kind of how it was. And like, we weren't perfect. Like I wasn't a perfect husband or father but it was pretty damn close man, like we were. It was Gillum pretty good. And then one day I get a phone call. So I'm a head coach at my old high school and I really love the job long, good. But I get a phone call back. This phone call comes from St. George Southern Utah, where I played college basketball. And these guys, they started a like a basketball complex with all these courts and they wanted to hire a basketball operations guy to put AAU basketball teams together and train players and coach they wanted me to run it. Like it was like my dream job basically. So I'm like Hell yeah, like, let's go. So we pack up our kids and me and Courtney, we go back to St. George and we start this new life. And then the first basketball tournament I have with this new job lands on the same weekend as our family reunion in northern Utah, which is about four or five hours away from where we live. And we always go to the family reunions every summer. But I told my family like we can't make it this year. I just took this new job. The first basketball tournament, like I can't miss the first basketball tournament. Like I need to be there. Sorry. And there wasn't an issue. Like my family understood it. And I'm like, yeah, like, no worries. And then that weekend, so the weekend of that tournament rolls around, and my wife, Courtney, she comes up to me and she decides like, hey, like, you're gonna be coaching all weekend. I think I'm just gonna take the kids to the family reunion. They'll love it. I'll be back Sunday will be great. I'm like, Yeah, sounds good. And then I told my wife like you should call my brother renice. To my brother race. We live in the same town. He's obviously going to the same family. Are you median. So I told my wife like you should call my brother and see if you guys can drive together carpool together like something. So that Yeah, good idea. So she calls race and he kind of has the same thing going on race his wife Keisha can't go and two of their kids can't go just because of football and work and things. But my brother's youngest son rider could go, so my brother race and my nephew rider, they get in the car and go to the family reunion with my family. And then that Sunday, coming back from that family reunion, my brother was driving and they're about halfway, probably two hours left till they were home. And a big sand storm kicked up out of nowhere. And golf the highway and it causes a 22 car pile up. And it kills eight people. And five of those eight people are my family. So my wife was killed. My son Riggins was killed my daughter Frankie was killed. My brother race was killed my nephew Ryder was killed. And my son blue survive somehow he was pulled out of the car by first responders lifeline into the hospital. I had a drive for hours to get there at a drive through the car accident to get there. And blue you had a neck brace arm or it's just like, you safe. But he was fine. Like he got he had a fractured hand and some deep cuts on his head. But we spent one night in the hospital together and left the next day. And that was yeah, that was July 25 2021. Still feels like yesterday and it feels like it was 30 years ago at the same time.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Thanks for sharing pardon me for a minute. I'm just gonna catch my breath here but moving forward. What have you done for yourself since then? You know, people experienced trauma all the time and different levels and different abilities to handle what what? Whatever they can. What have you done? That has helped you get through?

Unknown:

Yeah, love. I think helping me. I just want to like clarify. Because a lot of people talk to me like what have you done to get through it? How do you overcome it? And it's like, dude, like, What are you talking about? I haven't overcome anything like it hurts so but so I don't think I don't think that I'm ever gonna get over it. But you just have to learn to move with it. And I think I did not do good the first year just kind of ran from it and ignored it the best I could. But after that, helping other people. Mostly my son just being a good dad to him. And then we'll just go just try to help people. Yeah, yeah.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

I understand you started a kind of a mentoring program or program that seems to help. You want to describe that.

Unknown:

It's funny because people messaged me like do you do like one on one coaching? Like, what am I dude, like, I'm a mess. You don't want coaching for me? But no, I what I start I started a podcast like you guys. Well, I went to therapy. And my therapist is like, because I'm just not doing it. I want to die. But I can't die because my son lives so I have to be here from blue. So my guess is weird limbo of I want to die, but I can't die and it's not good. And so I go to my therapist and just kind of tell him everything and he says mais his car accident. It's not about you, and it's not about your son blue. And I was very upset by that at first. I'm like, What are you talking about? Like, it's the only thing on my mind. What are you talking about? He said, Mason, if you wanted to lay in bed and drink yourself to death or kill yourself, I don't think anyone would blame you. And then he said but Maybe like you have a huge opportunity here, like, and he said, Mason, someone tomorrow is gonna lose a spouse or a brother or a sister or daughter or son. And you can help all them if you want. And I guess from that, like, I think he's right. And when he told me it was an opportunity, I just hated it. I hate it so bad, but he's right, like, it is an opportunity. So like, what am I going to do about it, and I'm trying to choose to help other people. And some days I get mad, and don't do a great job of that. But I, I'm just trying to open up and be vulnerable. And let guys know that you can, like express your pain and talk about it. And you're not alone, though.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

I think that's, that's something that yeah, that I want to talk about. Because, you know, tragedy strikes. A lot of humans and especially man, a lot of us when we lose a spouse, or we lose a family member, we want to go in that dark hole never come out, or we want to go into deep into that bottle, and never sober up. And, and the one thing that I think drives a lot people crazy, and correct me if I'm wrong. But as humans, we want to help people like you and we send a motivational quotes, we send them emails, we say I'm praying for him, or I'm thinking of you and we send a lot of Texas we don't want to call it because we don't want to talk the person. So it's easier just to send an email or a text. And, and, or we turn to a motivational quote, yet, it's so hard. And sometimes our intention to lift those up doesn't really help what up from a person that's going through it and has not gone through it, but is going through it. How do you find that spark, to push through the grief to put the bottle down or to climb out of that basement.

Unknown:

I think like, for me just just talking about like my drinking issues and drug issues that I went through trying to numb it and run away from it. Like I never viewed like drinking wasn't the problem. doing drugs wasn't the problem was my family diet. And how I was coping with with it was numbing it. And so I think it's so hard as alcohol is so hard, man. But it's so it, it sounds easy. It's much harder, but you got to try to substitute something with that. So because the problem is not going away, my family is still gonna die. Like if I choose not to drink, they're still going to be dead. So I'm still going to have to do something with this pain. Instead of trying to numb it. I've just tried to embrace it and accept it and talk about it and be vulnerable and open up. And then literally, it's just one thing I have to say other than that is everyone's already said it. And it sounds simple, but it is true like exercise. And like that stuff matters like movement. Maybe I just didn't move. After the car accident. I didn't I couldn't move. I just didn't move or so on. Like just moving going to walk. Get the sun on your like all those weird small things helped me with the alcohol thing too. But it's not going away. That alcohol can postpone it and numb it. But it's just going to come right back. And it's probably going to come back a little worse and a little stronger than it was before. And until you start facing it. How do you want to face it? You could do art, you could talk about it. You could do poetry journal, I did a podcast you could do a whole number of things. But I just think finding an outlet for that pain and misery. And try to find that healthy outlet to help other people is really all you can do. But it's still still gonna hurt I think

Dr. Spencer Baron:

basically, tell us about the podcast. How you had that idea to come up with it the name of it. The purpose Yeah, and and what you want your listeners to take away from each episode.

Unknown:

So Dr. teranet, Terry and I were talking about it a little bit before we started recording but just the idea of you just you just need one or two listeners. Like that's all you need to know like seriously like, yeah, and that was my so okay. Sorry, my brain rather than not good. I'm like all over it. Okay, So I leave that therapy session with my therapist. And he's like, You need to help people. So I'm like, Okay, how do I help people? Like, what do I do? Like, pick up garbage on the site? Like, what do I do? And so I'm very confused. And so I'm like, Well, when I went to college, I got a degree in psychology and my dad, he's been a therapist his whole life, like, maybe I can be a grief. Counselor therapist. Sounds perfect. But then I'm like, I there's no way I can do a master's program right now. Like, some days, some weeks, I can't get out of bed, three days a week, like, I just can't do it like not ready. From okay, how do I help people? And I will what's helped me? Will talking about going to therapy has helped me. So I'm going to keep talking about it. And then maybe I can help other people talk about their pain, because it's really helping me. So if I can show other people that talking about it might help them, maybe I can help them. So how do you do that? Well, podcast, perfect idea. So that was kind of how the podcast was born. And then like, so I bought this cheap little podcasts set from Amazon. And I just went down to my basement and I got my buddy Sam, who was my co host at the time. And we just started recording. And I told Sam, I'm like, I don't care if anyone listens, or no one listens. I just need to talk. And it's, it's grown. It's grown a lot. And a lot of people have connected to it. And it's been a cool experience.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

Can you tell us tell us the name of a kid just behind your left shoulder but

Unknown:

was mean, but we just live in a little two bed apartment mean blue. And so I'm trying to set up for this podcast, my water set up. This is the best setup. This is his whiteboard. But anyway, yeah. Why is 10% What happens to you and 90% What you're gonna do about it. So it's great. I'm trying to come up with a name for the podcast, and not doing a good job. Like, nothing really sounds good. And then my dad texted me one day, and he's like, I love this quote, I think it relates to us and what we're going through. And he sends me the quote in the quotes, life 10% What happens to you and 90% What you're going to do about it. And I love that so much, because that's kind of the phase I was in was finally accepting that, yeah, they're dead, because you're just in so much shock. So I'm fine. Like a year has come and um, it's settling in a little bit more like, yeah, this, they're actually dead. And this is my life now. And so I'm kind of on the verge of like, okay, like, what am I gonna do with the rest of my life? Or blue? Like, what are we going to do here? And it was, it was just good timing, I think. And so I decided to name the podcast, the 1090. Podcast, that quote,

Dr. Spencer Baron:

that's great. Have you? What do you usually do on the podcast? What do you talk about? What do you what kind of guest Yeah,

Unknown:

first couple episodes. Like I told my story. My buddy, Sam told his story. And then after that, we just started asking people to come on and man like, you think my stories. I flew to Kansas City to do a podcast with this lady. And her family was in a hurt tornado. And it killed her husband, her mom, two of her kids. And it's just like, and it's weird because I felt so alone. That was one of the things I struggled with. I just feel I felt like an alien like no one even. No one can even relate to me. And then like, oh, like not only do people relate, but it's worse or so people. And I did a park I flew to Australia did a podcast with this guy named Craig, who we're good buddies with. He was driving home with a wife and two kids. Car accident. He crawled out of the car was trying to get back in to get his kids out kit, the car lit on fire. And family burned and like just the worst dude. So not even sure if you want to listen to the podcast, but like we invite guests on. And then because of the episodes are so heavy, we will have lighter episodes. So some episodes, we just answer a question. We just answered questions. Or we'll talk about a book or a movie just to kind of like give our listeners a break.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Yeah,

Dr. Terry Weyman:

yeah. You know, you touched on some that's pretty, pretty, pretty relevant that a lot of people are going through these tragedies. They isolate themselves. was put themselves in a cave because they think they're the only ones that are going through it. And a lot of people can't get over that, that loss of a loved one. And so they just buried themselves in grief. And I think talking about is huge because you don't realize that there there are others and some there's others that I don't think there's anything worse. I mean, there's nothing worse than a loved one dying. But there's people have suffered just the same things. And how do you find the strength to get up and what is you know, we talked about business in a thing your why so what what have you found your wife maybe before the accident was being the best basketball coach, you could possibly What's your why now? And

Unknown:

it? Well, it blew the like I would, here's what got me out of bed. And if it wasn't for blue, I don't. I don't know if I'd still be here to be honest with you. But maybe that's unfair to say, I don't know. But like, I mean, just think about Blue, blue went from middle child. Daughter, his little sister Frankie chasing him around. He's chasing his older brother around loving mother loving dad. And then he goes from that only child to a dad that's not doing good. Like that. And so I mean, he's like, he just, yeah, I just love that kid more than anything. And I

Dr. Spencer Baron:

How old is he now?

Unknown:

He's six. Yeah, you can and the accident happened July 25. And his birthday is July 29. So like four days later, we had to do his birthday. And that kid man like it's my hero. Like, he's doing so good. And he's happy kid and that's really helped me. And I think all things considered. We're doing good man. I just met this girl. I just got his girlfriend Sammy that is going really good. And starting to pick, pick myself up a little bit. But back to the Grifo. Like, you guys. You guys seen the movie castaway? Huh? Yeah, yeah. Remember when he's like leaving the island? And he looks back and he's kind of like sad. Yeah. That's, that's kind of a grief is like it sucks. Well, you kind of get it's the hell you know. You kind of get comfortable with it. Like yeah, like, I'll just drink and be miserable. Fuck everyone. And I kind of missed the attitude. Like, it was easy go. It was just like, yeah, do is it's hard to it's hard to date. Again. It's hard to put your heart back out there. About again, like, to me that's, that's honoring my loved ones. That's, that's like, that's the best thing you can do is live a normal life. And give it another go even though it went fucking terrible. And you didn't deserve it the first time like, you got to go again. And it's not about climbing Mount Everest or running a mile in under three minutes. Or like whatever it is. It's yeah, like, can I go on a date again? Can I get a steady job and make like that, to me anyway, that's like being a hero, at least in my mind. Yeah, like, that's just how I see it. But grief sorrow because it cripples you. But then it just becomes like, it just takes over again. And it's hard to leave it. It's hard to try again, knowing you might fail. It's hard to walk. It's kind of nice. That feeling of people feeling bad for you. That's kind of nice. Sometimes. It's hard to like, not want like no, like, I got this, like I can go to work today, I can pick up my kids from school. To me. I think that's the best thing I can do. And and I think a lot I get commended a lot for public speaking and podcasting. But to me, like getting back to school on time and going to parent teacher conference, like those are the big wins for me, you know,

Dr. Terry Weyman:

instead of a podcast name or a quote, you know, that your your life 10% What happens to 9% what you do about was focused on the 90% where you're doing about because isn't that the same before the acid is not the same thing you did to be a great basketball player. I mean, and as a coach isn't isn't sports, a great life lesson, because there's a million people play basketball, but how many people actually make it to a college level. So it's not the 10% that happens on the core. It's 9% of how you handle your adversities and how you get up and when you're sure when you're hurt and how you put in the extra time. I'm in practice, how is your your years of a athlete prepared you for this grief and tragedy in life? And do you ever do you ever put those two together and and kind of use those relevances and those analogies to get you through some time?

Unknown:

Yeah, really good question and app 100%. Yeah. And like, focus on what you can control. My high school basketball coach told us that every day and move on to the next play, like, you turn it over, okay, like it's done now can change it? Like, what are we going to, like, we gotta keep going. That mindset, I think is huge. I really, really do. And, and I'm not the best basketball player ever. But like, I'm a 510, white kid from Utah, like to play college basketball is pretty good. Like, I do think my work ethic. I do think and it's so funny that you asked me that. Because this morning, me and my girlfriend were having a conversation about a podcast, she listened to you about this neuroscientists who said, They recently discovered a new part of the brain that shows like, if you can do things, this part of your brain will activate. Like when you're doing things you don't want to do. That's the best way to increase like, those are the people who live the longest. Those are athletes, or people who put themselves through things they don't like to do. That's what this neuroscientists and that's what yeah, that's what basketball taught me. I didn't want to wake up at 5am and run and then be weights. I want to do that. But I wanted to play college basketball. I don't want to wake up and face reality that my wife and kids are dead and my brother's dead. And my nephew said, I don't want to do that. But every day I have to do that. And I do think my experience with sports and the coaches I had, and then also the wife I had, and because she she was just the best, but all those things I learned from them. I do think absolutely. It's helped me. Get through this for sure. 100% I think sports are great. I love sports.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Your background in psychology, Mason, how much of a role does that play using principles that you learn there? And then your coaching style? Okay,

Unknown:

can we can I just ask you some? Sorry. Like, this is okay. I don't I don't really believe in fate. Like, I don't think I don't think things have had to happen. Like I don't think my family had to die in a car accident. But it happened. So what are we gonna do about it? But like, okay, because these are both Okay, let me just here we go. All right. What are your thoughts on this? I don't even maybe faders are, just listen to listen, listen. Hey, Mason Sawyer. I was born youngest of five kids. My dad was a therapist. My mom grew up on a farm. My mom has the craziest work ethic. So like, I remember being a kid, when I heard my mom coming home, I'm like, Oh, I gotta act like I'm doing something like I need to do or she's gonna put me to work like, so that's kind of my childhood youngest of five kids. My older one of my older brothers was a really good football player. My other older brother was a state championship wrestler. They kick the shit out of me grown up. I meet Courtney. In high school. Also, I was raised in the LDS Church, the Mormon church. I'm not a part of it at all anymore. Not for me. But I grew up in that church. So when I'm 19 I give up my dream I give up my because I get a division one scholarship to Boise State. That was my dream to play D one basketball. I give it up the Oh serve my mission because that's what you do in the Mormon church and serve mission. So Courtney, like listen out here. This is Courtney and I for two years. We can't No phone calls, no texts, no emails, nothing just letters. So only way we can communicate for two years. So Korean I learned to have this relationship away from each other for two years. We learned to communicate through these letters. She writes me three letters a week for two years. She wrote me three letters a week for two years. I just think about that. Like, right like we're separated we like but we're still in love. Like it's weird. I get back from that mission. Well, actually, I get sent home from that mission. I go back out on a mission that was another part but anyway, I get back from that mission. I go play college basketball. And what this back to your question Dr. Spencer is I get a degree in psychology. Okay, well, that's kind of and then oh, and real quick as a missionary for the LDS church learned to be a really good public speaker, when I was a high school teacher, public speaking every day, and then I get a degree in psychology. Okay. So like, what do you get? Like, you guys are doctors? I don't know what up but it says doctor. What? Like, if you if you type that into like an AI generator, and said, What is this guy going to do? It would probably be motivational speaker, like, Wouldn't it like? Is that not? Where do you guys like some moments like? Again? Like I don't believe in the fate i? Or maybe I don't know. But I, it gets weird. Sometimes when I look back in my life and like, what was it? It does kind of feel like I was prep for this. In a way. I do have thoughts like that. And it really freaks me out. Because I don't know how to make any sense of oh,

Dr. Terry Weyman:

maybe instead of saying you don't believe in the faith, maybe just say it says putting that negative thought process in your brain, just let your brain go? Maybe Maybe believe more than you think you just don't understand it yet. And believe in their standing maybe different, different thoughts. And I think

Unknown:

I can't, I'm not I can't say my daughter Frankie was supposed to die. I just can't. I can't do that man. No.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

But you were you were obviously groomed. Yeah, to be in a position of this. You know, what, I guess you know, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger, you know? So what do you say to your athletes that that think they got? You know, the shit hitting the fan. And then they look at you and realize, oops, maybe my life ain't so bad. Because, I mean, there are times where I've had, I think you're dr. Terry and I were chiropractors. We specialize in sports. And we see a lot of athletes. And I've had a couple of opportunities, I had a couple that have contemplated suicide and actually discuss the possibility of committing suicide. You know, what would you if you were confronted with a situation like that? What would you say?

Unknown:

Well, I think before the accident, I had a much different perspective of coaching than I do post accident. But again, I think, well, if we're just talking about sports, and maybe we'll get to the suicide thing later. But like, if I'm just talking about sports, what makes basketball great is it's this ultimate yin and yang of like, you have individual goals. But you got to put the team first. And that is so hard for teenage kids. It's especially hard for teenage kids, when they have mom and dad telling them they're the next Steph Curry and your coach just doesn't get it. That's not I don't know why we're doing that. But like, no, that's one of the things I really love about teaching these young players like, Dude, I know this is an individual one on one skills training session. But this isn't actually about you at all. This is about your team. And if you want to be a good basketball player, it's not about how good of a crossover you can do. It's about how well you can help like, can you help your team win? That's what like, that's what we need to figure out for you. Because you're not going to score 30 points a game, but maybe you can get eight rebounds and guard the other guy's best defender. Maybe you can do that like, Fine, like just real life lessons, because that's how life is like not everyone's going to be the president. Not everyone's going to be the big movie star. Not Not everyone's going to be Paul Simon. There's going to be some Garfunkel some people are Garfunkel. And just like, just being real with these kids like that this is reality. But so I don't know, I just the team. And that's a big part of that 1090 message. And that's a big thing that helped save my life was thinking about other people. And that's no joke like that. When I do my public speaking. I have many slides that talk about we is greater than me. Because when I wake up and I think about me, it doesn't go good. I just sit in misery. But if I can wake up like, Oh, I get to be on crackenback podcast today and maybe help some people or I get to do a public speaking thing today or whatever it is. Life seems like I can do this like I can help people. And I'm at the suicide thing. I just want to be really careful because I never came close to I didn't like have a gun in my hand or take pill I never came close to taking my own life. Like No, not really. Because the blue like I just, I can never leave blue here. So like I don't, I don't really know what it's like for some of these people that are really close, I just want to act like, I know everything, because it bugs me when people do that to me, but the suicide thing this is one thing that's helped me is, and this might sound weird to you guys, but it just makes sense to me is I No one's getting out of here alive. Like I'm gonna, I'm gonna die one day, and it's gonna be great, because I'm going to see my family again, maybe, and heavens not real. And at least, I'm dead in the pains over like, that sounds pretty good. But like, you're gonna die. So you might as well do the best you can with what you got until you die like you are gonna get that gift eventually. So just do as much as you can until that day comes. And maybe that's just so simplified. And that's just, that's just what helped me. If I'm being honest, that was kind of my mind.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

No, that's fine. Actually, Mason. Looking ahead in, you know what you see in your future. Let's get you know, a moment of what you're what you're imagining will happen with you, in your future. Some of your aspirations. What you imagine happening with you and blue and you and your audience? Tell us about it.

Unknown:

I think I want what tell me, let's just have a real discussion, right? Because I'd love and you got you can't you guys just have to promise me you can't just pump rainbows in my ass. Like, you got to tell me what you honestly think. Sound good?

Dr. Terry Weyman:

Would that be like I'm telling you that 510 You were probably a senator, not a point guard.

Unknown:

I think I want I want to be a grief counselor, I think that's what I want to do. So I'm actually thinking about maybe stepping away from the public speaking and the podcasting at least for a little bit. I don't know if I can do a master's program and all this at the same time. And because my first obligations to blue, so so I'm actually thinking about finally going down that road because that was I think I the social media thing, man, I just it's not for me. And I honestly think like being a therapist for like, one person, and if I could really like have an impact on their life. I do think that might be doing more good than a cool Instagram video that 10,000 People might see but it's not really they just scroll on. It's not really doing anything. So I grief is on my mind all the time. And I want to help people deal with it. And so I want to be a grief counselor. So to answer your question, that's kind of what's in my thoughts right now is looking about looking at going back to school and getting a master's degree.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

What's fun for you guys, is you.

Unknown:

Yeah, good question. It's been dark. Let's light good. Man blue are always hanging out. You love basketball. Football. I bought cuz I live in St. George. Yeah, desert all around us. And so I bought blue, a little dirt bike. So he's been dirt biking. And I don't know you guys know about one wheel? Yes, I have one more than I want. Well, every day, that's been very slow. Butik for me, so we do a lot of one wheeling together and just try to move and yeah, do I like to think we have a lot of fun.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

So tell me about this new gal in your life. How did I mean? That's pretty special of her that take on the grief as well.

Unknown:

Yeah, her name is Sammy and my dad. My dad, I look up to my dad alive. And he's a smart guy. And another reason why I want to be a grief counselor, therapist, guy, whatever. But my dad told me he's like, he's like, yeah, he's like, you're gonna date again and hopefully fall in love again. But he's like, it's probably gonna be someone who's fucked up because you're really my dad didn't use the F word. He'd never say that but I liked it. And, you know, I'm not going to go on to say Annie stuff, but she's been through a lot. And I think that that Bond's us together and she understands that I'm always gonna love Courtney. But I can still love her and it's just different things and what really has helped me with Sammy is she her relationship with blue is just like yeah, like really good. And that makes blue really likes her. So that makes makes it easy on me. But yeah, we're we're doing good together. So which probably means something terrible happens soon. No.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

We talked a little bit about I love the fact you're taking your center bike and my son started we put him on a motorcycle ride around five or six and he ended up taking it to the highest level he turned semi pro and fat Dalek guys that he used to know the guys he used to race or now and the pros. And, you know, he used to ride with people like Chase Sexton and Derek Derek. And, you know, that was his group and, and then he went pro mountain biking, which here we go St. George vizeum My, my, my brother in law has a place out there we talked about and there's a lot of good bound by trails out there. And he ended up racing for factory giant. And so, but the one thing that too will community did was you know, it brought him out of his shell and it teaches you fear in a different level of how to handle things and, and you know, people go why you're crazy to put your kid on the motorcycle or bike and is it dangerous? I go well, isn't football dangerous? Isn't you know, Isn't life dangerous? And you know, what's it going to do? You it teaches you so many things. So I commend you for for getting out there. And and

Unknown:

I mean, no, yeah, I think dirt bikes are great for that. And one Williams is great. Yeah. And I asked blue three questions every night when we go to bed. And one of the questions I asked him is what do you do when you fall down? And he says you get back up. And I that's my favorite part of dirt biking is when he wrecks on the dirt bike or he wrecks on the one wheel and it hurts. But he back up and he tries it again and and on those days when we go to bed that night. I always commend him on it. Mike remember today when you fell into one of the Learn dirt bike? What did you do? And he's like, I got back up. So yeah, I love I love skateboarding, skateboarding one wheeling all that stuff for kids man is alright, but yeah, they're, they might get hurt. No, they aren't. They're going to get hurt.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Like, like, what do you do? Yeah. So Mason, we're gonna dive into a fun part of the program, but it's gonna require you to be on your toes and answer quick and concise. It's our rapid fire questions. And we have five of them for you. And when you're ready, tell me I'm ready all right, here we go. Question number one. What is your morning mantra? They get your ass out of bed each day.

Unknown:

I read stoic quotes, and my son blue. Fantastic.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Was that? That was actually pretty impressive. Because we ended up we ended up having conversations about most people's answers, because there's this was a great man.

Unknown:

No, I I'm not like I'm not a big routine guy anymore. It's just one thing. But trauma is just you're just it's a roller coaster. So I'm all over the place. I usually try to do some stoic quotes and then blues usually waking me up doing some that's awesome. What

Dr. Spencer Baron:

tip Do you have that has turned your quiet house into a gift instead of a curse?

Unknown:

Dude, I think I think talking about I think and I think that's true in a lot of different scenarios in our life. Like when we don't talk about things like when we keep those demons in the dark demons, man, but if you just show some light on him, you just aren't even alive. Yeah, no, I I don't know that by exposing her they kind of become like, on your team. Like, I don't know. It's like flips the whole thing if you just talk if you own up just you're just

Dr. Spencer Baron:

you're doing good so far. I'm sorry. Yeah, that's great. Question number three. What's one thing about you even your close friends would be surprised to hear about

Unknown:

I have a nervous tic. I will pluck my nose hairs when I'm nervous. Very We're very embarrassed about that's awesome. But now what do you tell me? I pick nose hairs? I know I pick my nose.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

The best it is. You must not be nervous. I haven't seen you picking nose hair yet. Yes

Dr. Spencer Baron:

you might want to that's a beautiful that might be the best answer we've had all year but

Unknown:

yeah, I'm pretty open book. People know most things about me. Yeah.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

That's good. All right. Yeah. Ready for the next one? All right. If there was a film or a movie out in your life, who do you want to play you? Brad Pitt? Even has a

Unknown:

big movie guy. I'm a big movie. But like, but Fight Club, Brad.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Yeah. Isn't that great?

Unknown:

I'd like Yeah.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

All right, ready? Question number five. What's the craziest thing you've ever done? Naked? Not sure if you heard the naked part. Did you hear the naked

Unknown:

I got one. Buddies, we snuck into the West Jordan City pool. And we got naked and we're jumping in. And then Oh, no. I have to take it. Oh, man. I'm gonna have to take a listen, and I'm like a 15 young I'm, I'm an idiot. I'm sorry. Like not getting. But I have to take a shit. And so I go to the high dive. I mean, it's like 2am We were sneaking into this thing. I go to the high dive. And I squat down and grab on the diving board. Right? My Hey guys, and all my buddies turn around and I just lay one of drop a bomb. And then I had to wait. So then I had forgotten I had to jump in the pool to like and swim around for a minute. So there's that part too, so.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Okay, I gotta ask my question, though. This is unique. I mean, how much did you drink that night?

Unknown:

No, I didn't drink. I didn't drink any alcohol. So

Dr. Spencer Baron:

excuse

Unknown:

this stupid kid on Addison. Yep,

Dr. Spencer Baron:

that's a beautiful

Unknown:

part of it. If I didn't have to share it, I wouldn't have done it. Terry

Dr. Spencer Baron:

is seriously one of the best answers we've had 140 Something show

Dr. Terry Weyman:

I'm gonna be honest with you. When did the only one that compares it with is Gary George had a good one. So

Unknown:

yeah, that's nothing. He's got a good

Dr. Terry Weyman:

Oh yeah, that would be great. Same fun line. You know, I gotta ask you Yeah, social media is especially since the pandemic has blossomed up and ever be wants to put out their their perfect life and everybody thinks that their life is perfect. And you know, the perfect vacation or the perfect family perfect this and that's not reality. And then we had a guest on in fact there last week to show this a lot of people will put stuff on there even when they're and Dr. Spencer brought it up even when they're trying to show reality they're still putting it out there to to for themselves to be light. You know, what's your thoughts of how to be more authentic in 2024?

Unknown:

Do like I just Yeah, I don't even I don't really care about like in my podcast. I have no idea how many people listen, to be honest with you. I think it's I don't know. I don't even know. And I just okay, let me I do every Wednesday on the 1090 Instagram we do a would you rather question and they're all over the place. Sometimes they're serious. Sometimes. They're completely kidding. Let's just whatever. Did one yesterday was about like, does everything happen for a reason or not type of thing. Anyway, I offended some people. And this one person messaged me being offended. And I, and I just said, sorry. We like to have tough conversations, you're more than welcome to unfollow us, I wish you nothing but the best. Like, I'd rather have 20 solid listeners that are plugged in, like 1090 episodes, then 2000. Like, whatever. That's just, that's just kind of who I am like, I don't know if I understand your question, dude. I'm sorry, but I don't. I could delete Instagram, and be fine. But then I'm, I'm like, gotta help people, you got to play the game. If I want to get my story out and help people. Then I got to post the video. I just like, it's a weird. It's the yin and the yang, you know? Yeah. So and then I have a lot of guilt about it too. Like, because I get paid for public speaking. And I don't like getting paid, like I feel bad about it. But I can't just go out of town for three days and not like I need to get paid. So I really struggled with that, which is another reason of maybe I just become a grief therapist, and I just kind of leave that behind. But I don't know, just no one's better or worse than anyone out there. I don't understand that thought process, which is weird coming from me because I was a rah, rah basketball, win at all cost type of guy for a long time, but you're the only you and there's no one else that has your experience. And you can take that idea and be a coward with it and be like, No one understands me, I'm the only me so no one, no one can tell me what to do. You can't hold me accountable. I'm just me. Or you can take that idea and really do something positive with it. And, and not worrying about judging you, or comparing yourself to others and that type of game that people get into. But you're I mean, just be you and and i i It's weird because I think me being honest and open and not caring about getting listeners and viewers has actually gotten me listeners and viewers. That's kind of weird how that worked. Like I just never, I don't worry about it.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

I don't worry about it. So Mason, before I appreciate your your, your authentic answers. And before we sign off, I gotta ask you tell me a, give us a What would you rather do question that you? You've thrown out there one of your favorite ones?

Unknown:

Or would you rather do rather Yeah. Okay, I'm not gonna say this is my favorite one. But I like this one, because there's lots of follow up questions involved, which makes it okay. You can have, would you rather have $10 million. But it's all pennies. And if you want to buy anything, you have to hand roll the pen. You can't get a machine to do it. You can't hire people to do it. Wow, your pens, or you get $2 million. Anyway you want Wow,

Dr. Spencer Baron:

cash. However you want you come up with these days. I am

Unknown:

a basketball player. So on road trips I would play would you rather with my team, I would just ask him would you rather than all glory? Or you gotta give me an

Dr. Spencer Baron:

ah, I think I could turn true. I could. I'll take the 10 mil. I mean, excuse me, I'll take the two mil and I'll turn it into 10 mil, but I'll take the 2 million and then deal with it that way.

Unknown:

Dr. Terry, what do I yeah,

Dr. Terry Weyman:

I had the exact same thought as my buddy here I was I would rather take the 2 million in any way and invest it to grain that 10 million don't have to sit there and roll up a bunch of pennies and then take it to the bank to invest it. I think I think I think I can roll the 2 million better into a 10 million thing than I would have been to sit there roll. I'll have that kind of time. I think the time it takes to roll $10 million. I rather take that time and be smarter with a $2 million investment.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Basically you got an answer.

Unknown:

I definitely rather take the 2 million. It's funny though, because I asked that one on our 1090 and it It was hilarious. We're peep like we had people messaging and like they were mathematically breaking it down like it takes you a minute to roll pennies. Just gonna take this like people are getting into it. It was it was a, it was a good one. Yeah, I'm picking up picking the 2 million Honestly, I'd rather have 20 bucks. I'm not rolling. That's it. That's it. Yes.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

I'd rather like know, how much 10 million and pays with way would take up to a house.

Unknown:

Money people are quick. And they'll take the 10 million because it's 10 million compared to two and then like, when you talk it through, they're like, Yeah, that's a good one.

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Day What would you do?

Unknown:

Oh, no, I'd say I'd take it to urine. All right, well, you're talking about 1 billion pennies. Is that what it is? I see. 100? Like there's 100 pennies on the dollar. And that's $10 million. I think at that point $10 million? With the pennies. I don't think that's worth $10 million. No. What about this? What about this idea, though? Hey, you can't hire you can't hire anyone to help you. But what if like, what if, like, you open up a shop or whatever. Like, I'll just give you a bag of like all these pennies for 10 bucks, like you give them $100 And you kind of like maybe you could do something like that as part of

Dr. Terry Weyman:

your board? Or another one? How much if you had 10 $10 million in pennies? How much is the copper worth? Because actually, you might be worth more than $10 million dollars

Unknown:

melted down? While you're like melted down maybe?

Dr. Terry Weyman:

Because it actually might be worth more than $10 million to copper.

Unknown:

That's I haven't never thought

Dr. Spencer Baron:

I think I think we need to take this question to other podcast guests. And then compile a montage of answers.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

I think we need to have we have a show up just a podcast just what? I need this brilliant. I'm gonna do it with your permission on camera. I'm gonna steal this for possible rapid fire questions down the road to have what would you rather Whoa, yeah, that that is a good you give me permission says I got from you.

Unknown:

Awesome.

Dr. Terry Weyman:

You know what on that we're gonna wrap this up. But you know. I love the I love the show, because we've met the best people that have become our crackenback family. And and now that we have a division one center that is also part of our podcast family. I'm taking the biggest damn rainbow and shoving as far as I can get. But yeah, one last shout. Gary George, he hit another home run. Thank you very much. And Mason. It's been an honor and a pleasure. And I appreciate your authenticity. I appreciate your message that you show shared. We have a special I have some personal friends that are going through some pretty tough times right now with loss of loved ones. And we're hoping that your your words land on their ears and maybe have them get out of get out and start moving a little bit more. So we appreciate your everything you're doing. It doesn't get easier, but you move on anyway. And that's what sports is all about. That's what we do all about. So thank you for your time and your energy man.

Unknown:

I appreciate you guys for having me. Thanks,

Dr. Spencer Baron:

Mason. Appreciate you. Thank you for listening to today's episode of The cracking backs podcast. We hope you enjoyed it. Make sure you follow us on Instagram at cracking backs podcast. catch new episodes every Monday. See you next time.