The Art of Online Business

3 Pillars To Setting And Crushing Goals In A Stress-Less, No Hustle Way with Gabe Cox

• Kwadwo [QUĀY.jo] Sampany-Kessie

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Gabe Cox is a goal planning and business strategist who teaches how to market your business without relying on social media, so you can ditch the hustle culture for good.

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Gabe is back today to share simple tips for setting goals that work for different times in life and help you succeed over the long term. She talks about why it’s good to have a flexible plan, be open to changing your plan, and make sure your business goals align with your personal values and life situation.

Learn with us as we talk about how to create a goal plan with small, realistic steps that can keep you motivated and avoid burnout!


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Watch the previous episode on YouTube, "How to Grow a Business Without Social Media Featuring Gabe Cox"


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Kwadwo [QUĀY.jo] Sampany-Kessie’s Links:




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Speaker 1:

Are you planning your goals in 2025 and questioning like how specific should they be? What do you do for timelines? What do we do if we mess up? Should we put all of our eggs in one basket or should there be a really solid plan B? If you're curious, we have our guest, gabe Cox, right back here. She was with us on the previous episode and it was a lovely one. That one is linked up in the show notes below, but if this is your first time hearing, do you want to introduce Gabe Jamie?

Speaker 2:

So Gabe is a goal planning and business strategist and the founder of Red Hot Mindset, which you can listen to the previous episode to hear how she got that name. She helps entrepreneurs personalize and take action on a game plan that works with their capacity in different seasons. They don't have to sacrifice everything to hit their goals, and she teaches how to market your business without relying on social media, which I find very interesting in today's day and age, so that you can ditch the hustle culture for good. So welcome back, gabe. We're so glad to have you here.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, thanks for having me Excited for this topic conversation.

Speaker 1:

So are we quite frankly, so are we. So I've heard two views. One view is burn the proverbial ship, so you have no recourse and you must make plan A work as far as setting a goal. And the other view is that well, have like a very well thought out plan B that you can fall back on if plan A doesn't work. In your experience personally, and then in your experience coaching folks, which one do you think is great and which one do you think is trash? I love this question.

Speaker 3:

It comes from experience. I've done both ways, okay.

Speaker 3:

I have burned the ships. I have done the plan a and you have to go all in and sacrifice everything and do that thing until you get there, and where that leads usually is to burnout it or to us quitting on our goals because it's just so rigid. There is no room for error, there is no room for flexibility, there is no give for the season you're in, and so when I was in that side of things, I actually was working with a multi-level marketing business. So I've been in business for over 20 years now in different capacities, and that one, it was like we, you know, left our kids with our parents, went to conferences, went to meetings, went to we did all the things, but it was like focus on that one thing, do it this one way and it'll work for you, and we were just too stubborn to give up on that.

Speaker 3:

But what it did is it really sacrificed our peace? It sacrificed our family time, it sacrificed where we were really being called Okay. So that is, burn the ships, do the one thing. So there's that side and it led to like, straight out, burnout. The other side have plan B. Now some people like, well, if you have plan B, then is that an excuse not to do plan A? You have plan b, then is that an excuse not to do plan?

Speaker 3:

a well, I actually think you need plan c, d, e, f, g, h, I, j all the way down, because plan a never happens okay, rarely happens, it never goes the way you think it's gonna go. So if you burn, you burn the shifts and you go only plan a and you only focus on it, you're not gonna get to where you want to go. Plan B great, have another way to get there, right. But it doesn't always happen that way either. So I would say I lean more toward the plan B. But I actually lean toward the third option, which is create the plan and have flexibility, knowing it may not be plan A, b or C, but knowing that you're willing to rework the plan until you. Flexibility, knowing it may not be plan A, b or C, but knowing that you're willing to rework the plan until you hit the goal, if you're still being called to that goal.

Speaker 1:

Rework the plan until you hit the goal. This makes me think of it's not my own analogy, listener, you probably have heard this too but how there is an autopilot on an airplane sooner. You probably have heard this too but how there is an autopilot on an airplane and so it might take off from atlanta, georgia, with the destination of paris, for the long-awaited paris trip. That hasn't happened since 2022.

Speaker 1:

Just fitting that one in there yeah, just throw that in there, actually not that long ago not that long, not that long ago, but it could be sooner and so the plane is traveling and the autopilot, you, you think like the plane is directed directly at Paris, you know, and it kind of is, but with prevailing winds that are blowing against the plane and all these other factors, the autopilot is continually making course corrections to keep that plane on track.

Speaker 1:

Is that kind of what you're talking about by having a plan B, c, d and just being willing to tweak a bit?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, exactly, because you never know what roadblocks are going to come right. You might have a detour, and so, for kind of my example too is like you can't really get to a destination without mapping it out. You have to know where to go, or how to what turns to take, what exits to go on. But let's say you only have that one direction, you only know how to what turns to take, you know what exits to go on, but let's say you only have that one direction, you only know how to get there one way, and you each were. Now you have to decide am I just going to turn around and go home because I don't know how to get there, or do I find a different way and you know, get around this detour and that's how I see like having even.

Speaker 3:

I don't even think you have to define what is plan B, what is plan C, but just knowing that there might be a way that you need to shift and it's okay.

Speaker 2:

Right, there's often so many things that are outside of our control. You know, in online business, there's, you know, things that are always changing. There's algorithms that are changing. I mean, as Facebook and Instagram ads managers, we're constantly seeing meta just making changes like, oh, that wasn't there before, or now you can do this, or now you can't do that and so all these little things. I often think about a quick personal story. When we were living in Xiamen, china, and we were, we had gotten our teaching certifications and so, like, our end goal was we wanted to work at an international school, and so, like, we actually had our plan A, B and C was like this was back in 2010,.

Speaker 1:

Right, keep going.

Speaker 2:

This is a good story.

Speaker 1:

Nine 10, 11, 11, 12, 12, 13.

Speaker 2:

We're getting lost in time, it doesn't matter. The point is is that we, our first goal was to work at this, this international school in Xiamen, like we were going to. We did our student teaching there and so, like plan A was we both get jobs there for the following school year. Plan B is maybe they only hire one of us and then the other one will keep working, maybe at a local school. Plan C was neither of us gets hired but maybe, like one of us or both of us can still do like some intern work there, kind of know, as Quajo talked with the director of the school, like there were things that were outside of our control where they actually could not hire us because of, you know, we had to have, you know, two years of experience and things with the government and visas and blah, blah, blah. And so we were like, oh so now our plan A, b and C just kind of went up in smoke.

Speaker 2:

But then God just opened another door, like within two days, literally, at another school and another city and just literally, like just lined everything up, had two ESL positions, that which is what we both wanted for the following school year, and it was just all these things that lined up. That was like our initial literally three plans did not work out but then, like this whole other door opened and we still had that end goal of both being teachers at this inner, you know, at an international school and you know, like got moved to another city that we hadn't even considered, or you know how quickly did that happen?

Speaker 1:

was that like within a week? It was within a week, because I I remember I was like walking down the street during like the lunch break at like a part-time teaching job I had, and I was praying and I felt like god was like hey, tell like this, what was it like the principal or something yeah, like call this dude up and tell him your plans really quick.

Speaker 1:

And I was like, huh, okay, this is all right. And so I called him and met with him, and then he dropped that bombshell like hey, you know, none of those plans would actually work, um, but they were supposed to be able to work, but everything had changed, right. And then just that next week I think was it friends that came into town this is by thanksgiving, I don't know and at any rate, it all happened, really quick, it all happened super quickly and it was such an answer to prayer and we had a cool school and two jobs that were in the same department where we got to work together so yeah

Speaker 2:

I love that I, like your, have your plan a, but just know that and you know several other people that we've interviewed on the podcast as well that just things change that were out of your control. And how are you going to kind of navigate those changes within your business and say, hey, I was going to offer this, but then this changed. My audience actually wants this instead, and so, like, things are always kind of shifting and you just have to kind of make those changes, right, you can't just hold fast to that one thing if it's not working. You know.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, absolutely. I think that's a really good analogy because it's like plan A is so that we can do the work, because you can't steer a parked car, you have to take action in order to hit your goal. You can't just manifest it right, like you can't just think about it all the time and it'll happen. You have to take the action, but you have to have a plan for that. But then when you're too rigid with that plan, then you have those issues. So that way, with the flexibility, then you can see those open doors when they're there, right, instead of just having blinders are good, but not blinders to the plan, because that's not going to be exactly how it turns out.

Speaker 1:

Right. So I wanna know about how to make a goal. I see here see it, plan it, do it. And as far as choosing a goal and getting the goal done, gabe, I would love for you to talk about those right after.

Speaker 1:

I ask our listener for a favor. Dear listener, here's that favor. Can you comment below do you like to hear more about our personal lives?

Speaker 1:

I know I'm really curious, though, because on a podcast, I feel like the episodes can be very transactional.

Speaker 1:

There's a title, you click and we only talk about that, and after 50 episodes of getting valuable content, you know nothing about us, and I am genuinely wondering how to fit in more of the personal side, because, like in real life, if we were going to hang out with somebody or do business with them, we would hang out Like we would go get coffee, and so I'm like I'm quite curious, and so I am looking specifically at the comments on this episode, and if you got any ideas or if you remember anything that we shared about us that resonated with you or you're just like, yeah, we would like to know a lot more about, like your personal life slipped into various episodes, like now would be the time to tell us. And if you're listening to the audio version of this podcast, there is a link straight over to the YouTube channel, this specific episode, in the show notes below, and you can leave a comment too. It would mean a lot to jamie and I yeah, I'd be curious to know.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, super curious to know, all right gabe all right well, see if planet do it, break it down for us.

Speaker 2:

I don't do it.

Speaker 3:

I love it. Well, I'll tell, I do love hearing about like personal life things and transitions and updates in episodes. So, just so you know there's my little take on it. All right, but yeah, see it, plan it, do it. That is my simple three pillars to crush your goals in a stress less, no hustle way. And, like I said in last episode, I love all things simple.

Speaker 3:

I'm like how? My one of the questions that I ask in everything that I do is how can I blink? Simply. So how can I, you know, run this launch? Simply. How can I build out this conference? Simply, how can I do my goals? Simply, you know. How can I get this one X thing? Simply Because I know I have a full plate, I know you all have a full plate, and so it's like adding this thing on to what you're already doing might seem near impossible because we're stuck in the finish line.

Speaker 3:

We're stuck there, right. So I'm a marathon runner, I'm all about running analogies, so you're probably gonna hear a few of them. That's what my books are labeled. They're not even for runners, but that's the title. But essentially like if you're looking at the finish line, if you're looking at the summit, and that's all you see. Then it feels so daunting and it feels so impossible and the anxiety rushes, like how am I going to get this to go Right? So the three pillars see it, plan it, do it.

Speaker 3:

See, it is really about taking that big vision. I love dreaming, I love thinking about what, if I could do anything, if nothing were impossible to me, what would I want to do? Like that's where I would start and get that big vision. Think about what is that big goal that you have? But we don't end there, because if you have make a plan for that big goal, then you don't really have these stepping stones to think about. You don't have, you can't see the results that you are probably, you probably have a lot of results along the way, but you don't think you do, you're like're, like I am no further in the process. I don't know if any of you have been like I. Just I feel like I've done so much today but I've done nothing right. That's how it is when you take that huge vision and that's all you're looking at.

Speaker 2:

I'm cracking up, because he says this like every day. He's like how is it already one o'clock and I've done nothing today? And and I'm like but you did this, this, this, like we sit right next to each other when we work, Right, and I'm like I've seen you do like a million things, he's like, but I still feel like I've done nothing.

Speaker 3:

But I haven't finished anything. Yeah, exactly Right.

Speaker 2:

But the list is still so long, yeah.

Speaker 1:

To clarify, but the to-do list is still so long. Yeah, to clarify. To clarify, because I am a Facebook and Instagram ads manager specifically, the frustration can be like days will go by where I finish the things I'm supposed to finish in client accounts. So I'm working in the business, but then I'm not necessarily having the time I need to work on the business, to advance the business towards business goals, rather than just keeping operations going well.

Speaker 2:

I feel like I need to give that clarification. Let's be like what?

Speaker 3:

is going on behind the scenes Honestly, I think that a lot of them are probably like oh, I, you're totally in my head, I totally did the same thing. I actually did accomplish 10 things, but I felt like I did nothing Right, Like that's just how we are, Our brain, especially if you're an achiever, like you find a project and you're like I got to do that today or yesterday, you know, and so we just don't feel like we're getting anywhere even though we are, and that's like looking at that big vision.

Speaker 3:

So once you have that big vision and you know it, writing it down is really important. I do say post a picture, write it down. Now I am not one who's going to say I don't teach manifestation, okay, I don't teach that you can just look at it and think about it all the time and then you'll magically get it. Okay, that is not where I teach. I teach that you write it down and make it plain and so that you can see it, because the more you see it, the more apt you're going to be to do something about it, because action is what matters, right? So that's the see it, get that vision, see that big thing. But then we're going to plan it. And how we're going to plan it is we're going to reverse engineer that big goal because we want to create multiple goals out of it. We're going to create what I like to call stepping stone goals. And these goals now your goal could be monetary. It could be I want to earn a hundred thousand dollars in the next year or two. Okay, that could be a goal. But when you break it down, it can't be about the monetary, it can't be like I'm going to have 10 new clients, okay, because you have no control over that. Like we were talking about before. You don't always have control over how things go, but you can control how much action you put toward it. So those stepping stone goals I like to think about as like projects. So here's something I have to do in order to get to that next goal. So, for example, we'll take it into a marathon. I want to run a marathon. I want to finish. I've never run one before break it down. I have to run a half marathon, okay. So I, if I can't hit a half marathon, I'm not going to hit a marathon. So in order to hit a half marathon, I have to hit a 6k or 10k. So six miles, right. And in order to do that, I need to do a 5k. I got to run three miles and I actually have to run my first mile if I've never run a mile, okay. So those would be like the stepping stone goals.

Speaker 3:

In business, it might look like my goal is to hit 100,000 in revenue, but in order to do that, I you kind of have to think about how much money or how many clients maybe you need in order to hit that, right, so then it might be okay. I do need to hit 10 clients a month, okay, but that wouldn't be your goal. Your goal would be okay, how many people do you need to talk to in order to usually, like average, make it hit that next client or get that next 10 clients? It might be 100 people, okay, so that would be where, where I would look at. Okay, I know I need to talk to 100 people in order to find 10 new clients, so that is my goal. My goal is to talk to 100 people this month, right, so kind of thinking that way when it comes to the numbers, because I think sometimes we get stuck on the numbers. I like to get stuck on what can I do? And then it's like I do the work and I leave the results to God, right and so, but anyway.

Speaker 3:

But we break it down into some smaller projects and the reason I like to do that is because, one, it's easier to shift if you see that you need to. But also, once you hit that one goal, because it's smaller, it's more doable. I, you want to do that within like 30 to 90 days. You don't want a goal that's like the stepping stone goals. You don't want them to be longer than 90 days.

Speaker 3:

Do a 90 day run, 30 day run, because otherwise we get weary and like it's not happening. It's probably just too big of a goal. We want it to be doable and realistic for these smaller ones, because once you hit that goal, you see the results. It's like I just had a win and then we celebrate that win and then we can go, okay, what's that next project, what's that next stepping stone? And so we're not really looking at that big vision anymore, we're just looking at the next right step Right. And it's funny because as we do that and we look, then we're looking, we're like, wow, we're way further than we thought we were. Wow, I do see that we start thinking and believing that that bigger vision can come true.

Speaker 3:

Because the hard part is, most people look at that big vision but they don't quite believe it yet. So we need to set goals that we actually believe and so once we believe that one, we can believe a little bit more, and then we can believe a little bit more. We just build that confidence and we build that actually even stamina like the intention of our actions, and we build the actions and consistency and the habits that we need in order to see the thing through. So that's really the planet, part of it. So, like breaking it down, and I would even break down those smaller stepping stone goals to Okay. So what's the my weekly tasks for that? Like, what does that look like? Okay, what's my daily habits? What does that look like If I can only do one thing toward my goal this week? What's the most important thing? Right?

Speaker 3:

And then planning doesn't stop there. I always say have a weekly plan with yourself when it comes to your business goals or even just your life goals, right? Like I had a weekly planning with myself with my marathon training. How did it go last week? Did I get the training in? Did I do enough hill work? Did I do the speed work? Am I on track? Did I miss anything? What obstacles came? What distractions came? Can I fix that for next week? Right? And so it's really important for us to check in, and the check in is the way that we go. Okay, we're going on the right track. We're staying the course. We're staying on plan A for now. Nope, we need to shift a little bit. We're going to plan A minus, right?

Speaker 2:

We're going to plan B right.

Speaker 3:

So that is the planning stage, and planning doesn't end.

Speaker 2:

Can I interject something really quick? Yeah, I love that. This is so practical and doing like you said, doing those check-ins and actually evaluating where you're at right, and not one on the one hand not beating yourself up like, oh man, I didn't do this week, but just what do I need to do to stay on track, because we can be so led by our feelings. Well, I felt like I feel like I've reached out to so many people and like another business coach that we've worked with is so I love that. She's so, so practical and like having the spreadsheet and everything and, like you know, reaching out.

Speaker 2:

If you just reach out, it's a numbers game most of the time, right, if you just reach out to five people a day, you know that's 25 people a week, that's 100 people a month, like you were saying, you know, and it's just a numbers game. And then who is supposed to come into your business will come in. But you are taking that, those actionable steps to put in the work and to get towards your goals of, you know, x number of clients, new clients each month or something, but it's like it's, you know, she often has people in, you know, in the group. They're like well, I'm just not getting any new clients and I just I feel like I've been reaching out to all these people and she's like what are your numbers say? What does the spreadsheet say?

Speaker 2:

You know like who exactly have you reached out to? How many you know? And just keep at it. And so it's. I love the practicality of that. Yeah.

Speaker 3:

Well, the evaluating is so important because then you can look at it and go I actually did reach out to a hundred people and I didn't get a new client. Okay, well, let's look at it. Were they the right people? What was the messaging like? What do we need to tweak to try it again? Right? Or you might be like oh, I did get another few clients. Holy cow, I did work. Okay, I just need to keep doing it. Well, when you broke it down like that, jamie, where it was like I just have to talk to five people a day, that sounds so much more realistic than I have to talk that down.

Speaker 3:

Well, five people a day, you can do that in a half hour. That's where I think about it what's doable and realistic for your season?

Speaker 2:

Exactly.

Speaker 1:

Realistic.

Speaker 2:

Realistic.

Speaker 1:

I need to learn how to be realistic with my goals. Before we talk a little bit about the do it. I guess we already started talking about the do it. Right do it. I guess we already started talking about the do it. But you have a masterclass and on that page it says if you are more than ready to finally take that desire inside your heart from conception to the finish line, this is for you. You want to share a bit more about that for the listener, and the link is in the description below.

Speaker 3:

Absolutely so. This masterclass, it's the three pillars to setting and questioning goals in a stress lesson. Oh, that's a way long, I know, but it is essentially what we're talking about here, but in more depth. So what does the see it look like? And I give you that visual look and we do some practical exercises on crafting that big vision. How do you plan it? That's the hardest part, I think, for people because we get stuck in our plan. So how do we plan it with that flexibility?

Speaker 3:

And then the secret sauce to actually taking action that works, because we can take action all day long, like we we talked about in the last episode. We talked about how social media was like banging my head against the wall trying to get clients right, and it didn't work for me. So I was taking the action, but it was not the right action for me and my business, and so it's like how do you find that, how do you evaluate that, how do you make those shifts and how do you really get to that finish line without having to sacrifice family? Because that was the thing. Like I had mentioned in the beginning of this episode, I did go to burnout.

Speaker 3:

I've done that a couple of times to go after my goal and like thinking about it all the time and doing it, and that's my main focus. Well, when you have other responsibilities, it can't be your only focus, and so I don't want to sacrifice my family, I don't want to sacrifice my peace, I don't want to sacrifice living in the moment, like that's. One of my biggest goals this year is just to live in the moment and be present wherever I am. If I'm at work, I'm at work. If I'm at home, I'm at home, right, and so that's what this workshop is going to do is going to help break that down and give you like a realistic strategy to start working toward that next big goal that you have.

Speaker 2:

Wow, it's really good.

Speaker 1:

I almost feel like that could be the end of the episode. That's great.

Speaker 2:

I know it's powerful. Yeah. Do you have anything else you want to ask?

Speaker 1:

I think I would ask you to leave just to say a final thought, a final thought relating to actually doing the work that it takes to get to your goals and then we'll end the episode there.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that sounds great. So the do it part is the work part and, honestly, it's the fun part If we're willing to. And I know sometimes when we're planning and we're shifting, sometimes it can feel like it's an excuse not to do the work. But that's not the point. We don't stop working just because not working. We might shift it and do something different, but it's almost like the waiting is active as well. So we keep doing until. So you keep doing that work until either you're told to shift in some way or it's not working. Then you shift it because it's not working. And so really, that work comes with consistency.

Speaker 3:

It comes with let's think about that one or two, maybe three things to do this week. Don't overload your plate. Don't be ambitious and think you're going to do all the things in one week, because if you don't hit all the goals you have for that week, you're going to feel like a failure. Instead, think about what is that one main thing that I need to do to move my business forward, to move my goal forward and make sure that gets done. Don't let things get in the way of that. Right, and so when we look at it in that way, it makes that action so much more fun and so much more doable and really doing the action.

Speaker 3:

I like to talk about creating habits, but at the same time, habits can become just that. They can just become mundane pieces of our day when we have no intention behind it. So it's really about the action needs to be intentional. What is my purpose behind what I'm doing? Am I posting a video just to post it, or is there a reason behind it? Is it going to make an impact? Is it going to do the thing that I want it to do? I prefer quality over quantity. To do the thing that I want it to do, I prefer quality over quantity. I prefer that you take that time to really be purposeful in what you do every day than to just do menial things because you were told you needed to do them. So that would be my encouragement Be willing to do it countercultural, be willing to do business differently.

Speaker 3:

Be willing to do goals differently so that you can do them in a way that aligns with your values, with your capacity, with your season and with what you enjoy. Now your goal is you're going to have hard times, like it's going to be hard. That's why it's a goal, right. If it weren't, if it were easy, we'd just have it all right, like you will. You can do hard things, and there will be obstacles to overcome. Are you willing to overcome them? But it also needs to be something. If we don't enjoy it, if we don't enjoy that journey, if we don't enjoy the little things, then we won't stick with it, and so it needs to be in alignment with what you really want it to look like too. So that would be my encouragement Do it differently. It's okay to do that.

Speaker 1:

Embrace different. Thank you.

Speaker 2:

That's really encouraging. Thank you, Gabe. Thank you for that.

Speaker 1:

Thank you, listener, you've heard it. If you want to hear more again, head down to the description below so you can get that webinar and actually watch the training about the three pillars to setting and crushing goals in a stress-less, no-hustle kind of way. And, gabe, thank you for being on this podcast and taking the time to record this episode with us.

Speaker 3:

Absolutely Thanks for having me. This was super fun.

Speaker 1:

It's our honor.

Speaker 3:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

Until you hear from us or see us next time, be blessed, and we'll talk to you soon. Bye.

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Kwadwo Sampany-Kessie

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