Motor City Hypnotist
Motor City Hypnotist
Respect in Relationships ( the relationship wrap up)
Respect in Relationships, Part 1, Show Notes
In this episode of the Motor City Hypnotist Podcast, we are discussing respect in relationships.
And I’m also going to be giving listeners a FREE HYPNOSIS GUIDE! Stay tuned!
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Text the word “hypnosis” to 313-800-8510
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WINNER OF THE WEEK: Starbucks Workers Raise Over $40K for Beloved Barista After Her Car Was Burglarized
https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/starbucks-workers-raise-over-40k-for-beloved-barista-after-her-car-was-burglarized/
Respect in Relationships
Respect plays a crucial role in fostering a healthy relationship. It's normal for partners to have disagreements and arguments, but it's still important to maintain respect for each other. When one partner disregards or undermines the feelings, interests, opinions, or beliefs of the other, it can significantly damage the relationship.
At the beginning of a relationship, it is crucial to have an open and honest discussion about respect with your partner. While there may be some fundamental understanding of respect, it's important to acknowledge that each person may have their own interpretation and expectations of what respectful behavior entails. By having this conversation, you can establish a shared understanding and ensure that both partners feel respected in the relationship.
What is respect?
Oxford Dictionary;
a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.
due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions of others.
VERB; admire (someone or something) deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements.
How To Show Respect
In order to build and maintain healthy relationships, it is crucial to establish a foundation of mutual respect. This can be demonstrated through various positive behaviors, such as actively listening to your partner's emotions, respecting their personal boundaries, encouraging and supporting their interests and goals, and speaking kindly about them when discussing your relationship with others. By practicing these behaviors consistently, you can foster a strong and respectful bond with your partner. Respecting someone involves expressing admiration and esteem for them by consistently demonstrating considerate actions, behaviors, and words.
You can love someone and still be disrespectful
1) Good Communication
The concept of disrespect can vary from person to person. For instance, consider a scenario where someone purchases a vacuum cleaner as a birthday gift for their partner, believing it to be a thoughtful and valuable present. If the recipient of the gift is a stay-at-home parent who takes care of most household chores, it's import
FIND ME:
My Website: https://motorcityhypnotist.com/podcast
My social media links:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/motorcityhypnotist/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCjjLNcNvSYzfeX0uHqe3gA
Twitter: https://twitter.com/motorcityhypno
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FREE HYPNOSIS GUIDE
https://detroithypnotist.convertri.com/podcast-free-hypnosis-guide
Please also subscribe to the show and leave a review.
(Stay with me as later in the podcast, I’ll be giving away a free gift to all listeners!)
Change your thinking, change your life!
Laugh hard, run fast, be kind.
David R. Wright MA, LPC, CHT
The Motor City Hypnotist
In this episode of the Motor City Hittin' at Us podcast, we are continuing our series on relationships. So let me tell you a quick story. My wife said you're still talking about relationships. I mean, yeah, they're important, these are important things to dig into. She's like, well, get done with it already. She's like ready for something new. But we are talking about relationships. We're going to talk about respect in relationships, how you can build it, what happens if you don't have respect and all the things attached to it. And, as usual, we're giving away a bunch of free stuff, including a free hypnosis guide. I'll give you that information in a moment.
Speaker 2:In the meantime, we'll be right back Get ready for the Motor City Hypnotist, david R Wright. Originating from the suburbs of Detroit, michigan, he has hypnotized thousands of people from all over the United States. David R Wright has been featured on news outlets all across the country and is the clinical director of an outpatient mental health and hypnosis clinic located just south of Detroit, where he helps people daily using the power of hypnosis. Welcome the Motor City Hypnotist, david R Wright.
Speaker 1:What is happening, my friends? This is David Wright, the Motor City Hypnotist. We are back with another episode of the Motor City Hypnotist podcast. Yes, we are. Yes, we are. That is Matt Fox, the other voice you hear. Thanks for being here, matt. As usual, matt does everything for me and fill in drinks and running sound and making sure everything's on when it works.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Well, hey yeah, no, no, no, no, no. It's all good, it's all good. So, yeah, we're here in the podcast your voice, Southfield Studios, and shout out to podcast your voice. Been with them for two and a half years now.
Speaker 3:It's been yeah, it's been a long time. It's been a ride.
Speaker 1:We've been doing it for a while and it's great. So if you guys out there thinking about a podcast, something you're interested in, podcastyourvoicecom, check it out. They will take care of you Really other than getting your show together and knowing what you want to talk about. Come in, you sit down, you record, they do everything else Yep, they upload it. They don't have to worry about the RSS feed. That may scare some people out of doing something like this, but it's all taken care of.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so let me tell you first, folks, where you can find me. My website is MotorCityHypnotistcom. Check that out. Podcast notes are going back, are going on slowly but surely. So if you want to find old podcast notes without going through your podcast provider which they're all there anyway but check out the website. My social media links Facebook and YouTube, are both MotorCityHypnotist, and on Instagram and Snapchat and eventually on TikTok. I know it's crazy, but the Tiki talk MotorCityHypno.
Speaker 1:Tiki talk, yep, all right. Instagram, snapchat and TikTok. And for your free hypnosis guide, a PDF I wrote it just kind of explains what hypnosis is, what it's not, clears up some myths and misconceptions. That is yours for free. Just text the word hypnosis to 313-800-8510. That number will also be in the show notes. Wherever you're listening, whether it's on your podcast provider or even if you're on listening to Facebook Live. The chances are you're probably already joined my Facebook group, the MotorCityHypnotist on Facebook, but if you haven't, somehow you've run across it. Just click in there and like the page, because that we're up to 45,000 and some change something like that. I love it. So, yeah, jump in there, just subscribe, and that way you'll get a notification whenever I go live as well. That will help me out great a bit. And wherever you're listening, whatever podcast platform, connect, subscribe, link, give blood. Whatever you have to do on your platform to connect to the show so that you just get it automatically when it drops. Then you don't have to look for it. You said give blood.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I did All right.
Speaker 1:So, as usual, as I always ask people, leave a review. That would be really helpful. It just helps people. More people find the show and, if you like it, leave a review. That would help me out tremendously. All right, it is time. All right, here we go. That's how we did. It is done. Who it?
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:So I don't want to read the title because it'll give away the story, but I'll just start with the story. Recently, hordes Hordes like zombies, okay Hordes of West Virginia college kids who couldn't afford a cup of coffee, sheld out five dollars to help a motherly Starbucks barista buy a new car. Wait, wait, wait. Hordes of college West Virginia college kids. So pretty much all of them. Yeah, I mean hordes. I would say that's a lot.
Speaker 3:We're in West Virginia. Yeah, mountain mama, my was like four of them.
Speaker 1:Oh, I can't remember the name of the lyrics. I can't remember the name of the song. Now, not a John Denver? Yeah, no, I am. I mean, I know the song, I just couldn't come up with like all the lyrics. Really, right right now. Okay, the Starbucks on the Marshall University campus in Huntington, west Virginia, was always like a small family, with Karen Collins worth, 65, at the head of the table. Okay, the decades-long supervisor at the famous coffee shop location loved what she did, as well as teams of aspiring young students who made up her staff. Okay, so, so she's. Karen Collins worth is like the 65 year old mother at this Starbucks. It takes care of all the young kids who worked there.
Speaker 3:She's a mother. Yeah, everyone calls her mother.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love coming into work knowing what she's gonna, knowing that she's gonna be there. I talked to her about literally everything. Cassie Gray, a sophomore at Marshall who works at Starbucks with Collins worth, told today she's like my mom when I'm away from home and I can't talk to my mom. Right Today cover the story of an unfit double whammy of bad luck that befell Collins worth when her car a 2004 Kia that always had some kind of problem was burglarized. Oh boy, the first thief taking the catalytic converter and the second thief going in and stealing interior components.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know, at this point gray and her teammates, who always knew Collins worth had trouble with her car, decided that there had to be something they could do to help. Discussing what they might be able to accomplish, the team decided that they might be able to fundraise some money for repairs. Since so many people around campus knew the 65 year old barista and valued her, we all just kind of talked about it and we floated around the idea of starting a fundraiser for her. Gray said After work, when I got back to my dorm, I decided to just make it. To just make it because I figured even if we couldn't raise that much money, any amount would help. Sure, it was kind of just like a spur of the moment thing After the co-workers all shared it around Instagram, facebook and another social media platform called Yik Yak.
Speaker 3:Have you heard of Yik?
Speaker 1:Yak Is it? Is it like the sister of Tik Tok? I don't know. I've never heard of Yik Yak. I've never read the story. I was just thinking. Man, I've never heard of Yik.
Speaker 3:I don't know what that is. Is it a West Virginia thing?
Speaker 1:I might be, might be something for the young kids. All right, you know.
Speaker 3:Yik.
Speaker 1:Yak, as old people you know, I don't know.
Speaker 3:I learned something new tonight.
Speaker 1:Go on as of September 15th, the, the fundraiser, had amassed $40,000. What's she gonna? What is she gonna drive, headlined by a $5,000 donation from the president of Marshall University? Well, shit, yeah. Eventually the total got so high that Collins worth neighbor spilled the beans before the baristas could surprise her. Today writes that she is looking at new Subaru's, all the while feeling the love and goodwill that decades of serving coffee with a smile has accumulated. Couldn't you? She couldn't buy.
Speaker 3:American.
Speaker 1:I don't know. She's got a new car, she's got a new car.
Speaker 2:This is a mess.
Speaker 1:No, she's. So it's a great story that this woman 65, working at a coffee shop, I mean, I don't. I have no idea what her financial situation is. I understand that. But, but I do know that she was. The car that got broken into was a 2004 Kia, so that just says something. Right there. Right, if you're driving a 13 year old car or no, a nine year old car. Can't do math In my head 2004, that's a 2006 that's a 2004, I was thinking 14 that's a 18 year old brain like a chicken.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know, I'm sorry Me not good at math.
Speaker 3:No, I'm really I'm proud to hear that students and had stepped up and even the president, yes, the president of the university, although, again, I boy, I hate to say these things.
Speaker 1:These are such great stories, but the president of a university can only pitch in 5000.
Speaker 2:Boy, that escalated quickly. I mean, that really got out of hand fast, you know.
Speaker 1:David, no, it's a great story and I'm we're making jokes, but, but really the important thing is these kids got together started this fundraiser. Sure, people showed up and donated over $40,000 for this woman. It's just a good story.
Speaker 3:It's a good story. Well, they weren't paying on the student loans yet, so it's all good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's true. Yeah, Well, that's true. So yeah for for the, for the kids around Marshall University and for Karen Collins. Worth yes winner. Winner of the week for sure.
Speaker 3:That's how we did is done. I do appreciate the winners of the week.
Speaker 1:Yeah sometimes I just sometimes it raises questions and it's okay. You know when you know it's just like what happened.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know. Sometimes you just think.
Speaker 3:I just think things when I read stories sometimes that Marshall, that's Marshall University as of we are Marshall. No, I don't believe that. No, I don't believe.
Speaker 1:so, okay, I could be wrong on that.
Speaker 3:No, no, I'll find out, I'll find out.
Speaker 1:So back to it. So, folks, we were talking about relationships and we're hitting a deep dive on some areas of relationships that are super important. And here's the thing A lot of these overlap, a lot of them will have the same type of ideas and things, but we're diving deeper just to give you some more insights, some more tools that you have to use in case you have a relationship that is not really, maybe, where you want it to be, or maybe you're not in a relationship and you want a good relationship with somebody when you finally meet them. So one of the big things in a relationship, it is Marshall University in.
Speaker 3:Huntington, west Virginia. That is the Marshall movie. Yes, and Marshall University was founded in 1837 and named after John Marshall, the fourth chief justice of the United States.
Speaker 1:There we go. Okay, so it is. I was wrong. Yeah, so I'm gonna. I didn't know that was the same university, so good, good for them. Yeah, all right, go on. So we're talking about respect.
Speaker 1:Now, when you say what is respect, and I in general you, I could ask probably 10 people what respect is and they might have different answers. So, the Oxford Dictionary. We'll just go right to the source. Okay, what respect is not the Britannica? No, I just did Oxford, because that was that was the first one that came up in Google, not Wikipedia, that's a whoa, I'll say so.
Speaker 1:Respect a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities or achievements Okay. Second definition do regard for the feelings, wishes, rights or traditions of others. Okay, and the verb admire someone or something deeply as a result of their abilities, qualities or achievements. So your boss? Yeah, it's. Well, it could be your boss, yeah, yeah, absolutely so, so.
Speaker 1:So respect, and even reading these definitions, it can be very subjective, it can be very vague. I mean, I know these are like the Oxford Dictionary definitions, but sometimes you're like Well, what does that mean? What is that? So? So respect is it's and this is. This is one of the vital components you need to have to build a healthy relationship. Okay, so you know I'm going to give you some examples of how to demonstrate respect actively listening to your partner's emotions, respecting their boundaries, supporting their interests and goals, right, speaking kindly about them when discussing them with others. Okay, that's a big one. I want to hit on that one for a minute, because I have been around people and you probably have two mat that, especially with guys or even even females, both ways. I'm not going to this. This goes both ways when, when they're not with their spouses, they just talk about them and say bad things and a negative thing in a derogatory, or put them down or insult them in and I don't understand that, I don't get that and I know this is this whole.
Speaker 1:You know we go back to masculine versus feminine. There's this whole masculine thing where the guys are out they're going to talk about their wives and tell them, whatever she's such a bitch, whatever she's such a bitch, you know, whatever, whatever things that you could say about that, sure, but, but that is not showing respect and those things really one, even though that person may never hear that you're still wearing down and eroding that relationship by saying it yourself Mentally, because, because in your own head you don't think enough of your partner not to say those things. I mean it's one thing to think them, but to put to say them. Even that, that just taking it another step further.
Speaker 3:You know, David, I'm sure you've seen a lot of couples, and I know you've seen a lot of couples I have, yes, and yes, I've had conversations with you know, friends or what have you, and you know things get said but I know that they don't mean it, because that's how close you know of a friendship I have. Right, they don't mean what they're saying. Right Me, on the other hand and I'll bring myself into this, you know the situation that I went through the, you know, a couple of years ago. You know I really I didn't struggle, I was really, you know, cognizant, to not talk bad about that person, while, you know, speaking with friends and family and what happened?
Speaker 3:It's just that. You have to have a level of respect because you'll be a better and bigger person at the end of it.
Speaker 1:Yes, absolutely, and it's just the and again, this is subjective, but when I say it you'll know what I mean it's the right thing to do. The right thing to do is not talk poorly about your partner. That's just the right thing to do. Sure, so if you can have a relationship where that doesn't even cross your mind, if you're out with people away from your partner, that the only thing you say are positive things, that should be that. That's a great insight, that all that yeah, that's what I should be doing Just feels good, I don't have to say and it doesn't mean that you're not going to have conflicts or things that you don't like, but you're not complaining about those things to other people. Sure, so that's a big one. Here's the thing, and this statement is important you can love somebody but still be disrespectful.
Speaker 3:That's a big statement. It is, and I'm sure that a lot of people practice that.
Speaker 1:I and yes, and I see it a lot. So there are ways that you can be sure that you're going to be respectful to your partner. Number one is good communication. Okay, now, again, that is that's an overlap to probably every category we're talking on this series, but but the whole point is communicating. So I'll just throw a generic example out there. Say somebody that this is kind of a good cliche scenario. But say that somebody a husband buys for Christmas, buys his wife a vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 1:So, you already know where I'm going with this I do, and this is the best cliche example I could think of. So say that. Let me say this. Say the husband has good intentions in his mind. He's thinking oh, she loves appliances and she loves things like this. She would love to have a new vacuum, because she vacuums all the time. Wouldn't that be a cool good gift? Sure, and then the recipient receives it. It says what the fuck?
Speaker 3:I think they have some more expletives.
Speaker 1:Other than well, yeah, but it's, it's, it's, it's. Here's the thing. It's important to consider perspective. What's the perspective of the other person? And this work communication comes in huge, because if you were really talking about that, you would probably know that's probably not a great gift, that's probably not something she's going to love or really accept as like a very cool gift. Right, okay, so, but but and here's the thing where this can snowball she may receive the gift and not say anything. She'll say thank you, this is great, not saying what she really feels, which just exacerbates his actions going forward. I'll get her an ironing board, yeah, get her new dishwasher, I'll get her, you know, whatever and I know this sounds ridiculous, but this is this in different areas. This is how things degrade, this is how things kind of snowball that new swiffer that's available out there.
Speaker 3:Oh my god, I think we great for it.
Speaker 1:Hey, I got your subscription to apron of the month.
Speaker 2:I'm sure that that exists somewhere oh.
Speaker 1:I'm sure, I'm sure it is apron of the month. And then she would turn into this no, you got to take everything off the table.
Speaker 3:No, you've had your limit today, you drink water. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:So communication is important. So if you're communicating and you really know your partner very well, that situation hopefully will never occur because you would know better, right, even if the intentions are good. So now, if replay that scenario, okay, we need a new vacuum, the other one's crappy, it doesn't work. You talk to your partner and say, hey, I'm thinking how about we pick up a new vacuum, you know, after the holidays or maybe now, when we just kind of decrease our Christmas gifts to each other? Okay, that's a whole different conversation where both parties can benefit. Both parties know it's needed, but it's not an assumption of here you do it Right, here's your gift, I'm gone, so, so, and these are discussions to have all the time in a relationship. If these are misunderstandings, that it wrote a relationship also, because when you start misunderstanding you start to assume intentions and sometimes that's not the case. Sometimes somebody may have the best of intention, right, they just might be dumb. Do you know what I mean? It's? It just might be like they don't realize it, it's called reading the room.
Speaker 1:Well, yes, but some people don't read a room right, and that can be. That can be a problem. That's a big problem.
Speaker 3:Yes absolutely Number two be honest and take responsibility that the responsibility piece is probably the biggest piece of advice that you can ever receive. And then practice.
Speaker 1:Here's the thing they're going to be conflicts in any relationship you have. I don't care if it's a spouse, if it's a family member, if it's a roommate. If you live with somebody, there's going to be conflict. That's a fact of life. Here's the problem when you have a heated argument, sometimes you're going to make a mistake, and by that I mean call somebody a name and insult them in some way, say or do something you didn't mean to do. So here's the thing. And this is and I'm gonna expand this because, again, it's for partners, but it's also for any other relationships I deal with a lot of parents. This is a very common conversation I have, where parents will come to me and say I feel really guilty. Last night I just blew up and screamed at my kids. I was just at the end of my rope. I screamed at them, I swore at them, I told them to go to their rooms and not come out. In other words, the parent lost it on the kids not physically there was no physical contact.
Speaker 3:There was a verbal yes, yes, a verbal assault.
Speaker 1:And I always say to these people, fathers or mothers, I say, well, what happened afterwards? What did you do afterwards? Because, well, after everybody was calm, I went and talked to them and told them I was sorry and that I was just frustrated and I'm like, okay, there you go. That's exactly what you should be doing. You took responsibility, you shared it with them and I don't care what the ages are, I don't care if it's three and five, still have that conversation, because you're acknowledging I made a mistake.
Speaker 3:I'm taking ownership and responsibility of it and I'm letting you know it's important because a lot of folks they'll just have to deal with it tomorrow They'll go on the break open a box of wine or a bottle of bourbon. Right, yeah, and they won't deal with it until the next day, and then it just kind of festers and they don't deal with it.
Speaker 1:Well, no, and that's the whole thing, if you just ignore it and say, oh yeah, I was probably an asshole, but yeah, it's gone, it's over, so I don't need to come back.
Speaker 3:They won't remember.
Speaker 2:Don't bring it up again.
Speaker 1:But see, that's the whole thing. You have to take responsibility for mistakes. That's a sign of respect for your partner. Sure, I'm telling you it sounds overstated, but if you're able to say your partner I was wrong, I'm sorry, just that, that is powerful. That can have an effect on your partner like oh okay, look at that.
Speaker 3:But there's still the underlying problem. That, sure, and the mistake that you made. You still have to solve that. Yeah, but yeah, you take ownership for it, but what steps do you take to bring it to fruition?
Speaker 1:Well, at that point, you say, hey, I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that to you or I shouldn't have taught you that way. How can we fix this in a good and peaceful manner so that things are right? Okay, again, it's just being just taking responsibility of behaviors and looking for a more positive way to resolve whatever issue you're facing. Got it, that is exactly how to do it. So, folks, we are going to continue on with our series of Relationships Relationships Specifically. We're on respect. We're on respect. We're on respect and relationships. Cypher. We have so many subcategories of this, but we are. We're gonna have one more category and then we are gonna move on as far as our series goes, but we're gonna talk about respect and relationships.
Speaker 1:Part two, next episode If you're listening on whatever platform you're on, look for the next episode on the next Tuesday or Thursday. It will drop there Before we leave. Detroit Dog Rescue. Chloe needs a home. Chloe, she's a female. She was born in 2021, so about two years old. Okay, here's Chloe. Aw, look at that. Chloe's another. We have a golden doodle double header tonight.
Speaker 3:This is another golden doodle, and I know Chloe looks to kind of unkempt and everything but A little bit, yeah, but still she looks so cute though she looks like a lover, she really does.
Speaker 1:She does look at that.
Speaker 3:Cat friendly, unknown.
Speaker 1:Cat friendly is unknown. Kid friendly ten and over. She's about 50 pounds, again, about two years old. Give or take a few months, but yeah, chloe needs a home. Look at that, she's out in the playground at Detroit Dog Rescue. She's cutie. Yeah, somebody come and pick her up. She wants a home, she wants something to love her Absolutely.
Speaker 3:Thanks for that.
Speaker 1:We will be back next time. In the meantime, change your thinking, change your life, laugh hard, run fast and be kind. We'll see you next time. ["false Speaker" by M Meerley.