Therapy Unveiled - Q&A Part 3

What if taking a simple 15-minute walk could be the first step towards transforming your mental health? Join us as we unpack the essential tools and insights for embarking on a rewarding therapy journey. We promise you'll gain a clearer understanding of finding the right therapist, setting treatment goals, and the importance of speaking openly about emotions, particularly those who might find it challenging like men. This episode is designed to empower you with the knowledge to make informed decisions about your therapeutic path and the role you play in your own personal growth.

Our engaging therapy Q&A series continues this week with an exploration into the intricacies of therapy and hypnosis. We provide thoughtful responses to listener questions and offer practical advice on building trust with your therapist and assessing your progress through collaborative efforts. Delve into the critical steps of preparing for therapy, from listing your concerns to meeting your therapist for the first time. We tackle the challenging emotions of depression, anxiety, and anger, emphasizing early intervention to maximize the benefits of therapy.

Consistency is key in the therapeutic process, and we shed light on how commitment, honesty, and adaptability are vital components in achieving meaningful progress. Discover how homework assignments and incremental steps can foster behavioral change and lead to personal development. This episode also touches on the collaborative nature of therapy, where both client and therapist play active roles in identifying and implementing strategies for improvement. Whether you’re just beginning your therapy journey or reassessing your current approach, we offer insights to help you thrive.

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Change your thinking, change your life!
Laugh hard, run fast, be kind.
David R. Wright MA, LPC, CHT
The Motor City Hypnotist

Transcript

David Wright: 0:00

In this episode of the Motor City Hypnotist podcast, we are still talking about therapy Q&A. Apparently, two episodes is not enough to get all this information out.

Matt Fox: 0:10

There's a lot of questions.

David Wright: 0:11

So we got. This is part three. If you've not listened to part one and two, you can jump back and listen to those, or you can listen to this one and go back to those. We'll get it all covered. It'll all come together and, of course, we're giving away free stuff.

Matt Fox: 0:27

Hang in there, folks, we'll be right back. This sounds like something for the authorities in detroit.

Announcer: 0:30

Well, joke's on you. I'm living to 102 and then die at the city of detroit guys like this can't take over here out of detroit spawn in the hellfires of motown.

David Wright: 0:40

Take him to detroit.

Announcer: 0:43

No no, not Detroit, no, no, please, anything but that. No, stationed in Drambuie, it's worse than Detroit. We did not have, as a unit, the confidence that we felt like we needed to beat Detroit. Let's go to Detroit Now. You're talking brother. I don't think so. He plays for Detroit now.

Matt Fox: 1:06

Do they have many farms in detroit? Detroit to michigan.

Announcer: 1:08

I go to school, I know where detroit is get ready for the motor city hypnotist david all right. Originating from the suburbs of detroit, michigan, he has hypnotized thousands of people from all over the united states. David all right has been featured on news outlets all across the country and is the clinical director of an outpatient mental health and hypnosis clinic located just south of Detroit, where he helps people daily using the power of hypnosis. Welcome the Motor City Hypnotist David R Wright.

David Wright: 1:57

What is going on, my friends? It is David Wright, the Motor City Hypnotist, and we are back with another episode of the Motor City Hypnotist podcast. That's your bottom. Another episode of the Motor City Hypnotist podcast. That's your bottom dollar you are. It is. That's Matt Fox, the other voice you hear. Hello David, we're here live. If you're on Facebook Live on the Motor City Hypnotist Facebook page, you could be watching us right now. You could be.

Matt Fox: 2:18

We're live here in the palatial Podcast, your Voice, southfieldfield studios and if you're on the podcast, your voice facebook page, you could see it there, that's true, yes, go to the face podcast your voice.

David Wright: 2:29

Fake facebook page yeah, not a fake book page, it's a facebook page. So yeah, you can watch it in either place. And and also with with uh podcast your voice. There's a lot of other podcasts going on, so check the list out. You might be find something that you might like. No, I'll, I'll check it out. Like this one, like this one, for sure, but you can always check out the other ones as well.

Matt Fox: 2:49

Yeah.

David Wright: 2:50

So it's great to be with you folks. Let me tell you, first of all, where you can find me. My website is MotorCityHypnotistcom. Check that out. As I've said, the last, probably probably since the end of the year our high school prom and grad night schedule is filling up quickly. So if you need entertainment, a hypnotist, for your grad night or your post-prom party, go to my website. You can get a quote within minutes. Fill out your information, hit send. You'll get a quote back within a couple of minutes. You can book it and sign it and pay online. Everything is online. You can have it done in just a few minutes. Check it out and really do it now, because time is running out. My schedule is filling up really quickly and we want to make sure you get the date that you want. So check that out. My social media links Facebook and YouTube are both Motor City Hypnotist and Snapchat and Instagram and TikTok, which is still. I guess it's going to be back. I don't know, it's a thing. What I saw on social media today is that it's back.

Matt Fox: 3:55

Oh, because that's real, that's fake news, maybe I don't know. I don't know either. I don't do the tickety-tock, so anyway.

David Wright: 4:01

Instagram, snapchat and TikTok are all Motor City Hypno H. So anyway, instagram, snapchat and. Tiktok are all Motor City Hypno H-Y-P-N-O. Check those out. Follow me on social media. Just to be upfront and honest, TikTok I just started working on within the last couple of weeks. I know it's not great timing with the impending closure or shutdown, but it looks like that's not going to happen. So, whatever, Check it out. We'll build that out more if it stays around.

Matt Fox: 4:27

We'll work on that some more, we'll see.

David Wright: 4:30

And as we've done on every episode, going back to number one and we're on episode 289 today, I believe free hypnosis guide. It's a PDF that I wrote. It just gives you an overview. It's not an in-depth like a book, it's a two-page PDF, but it kind of gives you the overview of what hypnosis is, what it's not, dispels some myths and misconceptions. So check that out. You can get it for free by texting the word hypnosis to 313-800-8510. And if you need that information, it will be in the show notes. Or you can go right to my website, MotorCityHypnotistcom. Perfect, that's the phone number that's on the website. So text the word hypnosis there. You'll have your PDF in a couple of minutes and it will also ask for a review. Now here's the thing you can review a show if you've seen it. You can review the podcast. Either way, it goes to my Motor City Hypnotist Google account for reviews. Perfect. So greatly appreciate if you leave a review. That's the big thing, because it just helps us get out to other people.

Announcer: 5:29

And again.

David Wright: 5:30

grow the podcast, which is what we want to do. Yep, All righty.

Matt Fox: 5:34

Is it time?

David Wright: 5:35

It is time. It is time.

Announcer: 5:37

Oh, that's how winning is done.

David Wright: 5:48

Yes, Okay what do we got today? This is kind of a wild story, okay, so I'll just give you the title of the story and then we'll get into it. I'm dialed in. A truck driver intervenes in a highway shootout, wins Goodyear Highway Hero Award.

Matt Fox: 6:03

Goodyear's Highway Hero Award. Yeah, I never knew there was such a thing. I didn't either.

David Wright: 6:09

The thing that struck me is the first line of this Truck driver intervenes on highway shooting Like, wow, what? Okay, that headline makes me want to read more. Of course, a New York timber trucker oh, that explains it. New York, yeah, yeah, they'll do. A New York timber trucker oh, that explains it. New York, yeah yeah, yeah, they'll do anything there. A New York timber trucker has been recognized as a highway hero after using his 18-wheeler to help corral a shooter who had injured a police officer. Jeez, it happened that on Interstate 88 in June, timothy Van Nostrand was preparing to pass a state trooper who was approaching a car he had just pulled over. Okay, van Nostrand is the owner and operator of his own logging transport company in Northville, new York, and is well acquainted with dangerous work.

Announcer: 7:01

Although the risks he faces don't typically involve gunfire.

David Wright: 7:04

Excuse me, it happened so fast. No strand van no strand told fox news. I wasn't 100 sure what I saw at first, but I saw the trooper kind of skip sideways a little bit. Then van no strand explains he saw the driver draw his gun and start shooting out of the back window of his car at the trooper, which started a 12-minute ordeal where bullets were flying.

Matt Fox: 7:29

While he's driving.

David Wright: 7:33

Van Nostrand then pulled his logging truck in front of the shooter's car, cornering him against the side of the road and ensuring the shooter was stopped. Fox didn't specify if he was taken into custody, wounded or killed by the troopers and the eventual backup that arrived. Van Nostrand was later honored by the New York State Police and by the Goodyear Tire and Rubber Company as a Highway Hero. Wow, I guess that's where the Goodyear Award comes in.

Announcer: 7:59

I had no idea. I never knew that existed.

David Wright: 8:01

The Goodyear Highway Hero Award is one way Goodyear recognizes the importance of commercial trucking industry, which helps move 72.5% of the US economy's goods, according to American Trucking Associations. Joe Burke, vice President of Goodyear North America Commercial Business, told Fox News Digital the purpose of the Highway Hero program is to bring more awareness and appreciation to the powerful impact that commercial drivers can have on the roads, individuals' lives and communities. Then Nostrand was awarded a cash prize and a ride in the Goodyear blimp. During what game?

Matt Fox: 8:41

Hopefully there's no shooting up there, geez right, not in a blimp. I've watched enough 007 to know. Know that that's uh.

David Wright: 8:48

Go on yeah what in blazes are you talking about? I don't know. I just picture a blimp and I was thinking hindenburg I don't know why that's, that's just the way it goes.

David Wright: 8:58

Van no strand was awarded a cash prize in the ride in the good year blimp. He told fox that it felt like such a long time when you're sitting there listening to gunfire, allowing plenty of time for second guesses, but it turned out it was the right decision. Most of the people I know and work with would do the same thing. He said we all look out for each other and 99% of us are looking out for everybody else too. I love it. So that is the story. So two, I'm going to get his first name Timothy Van Nostrand the truck driver. Good job, yeah, I mean risking your life to pin this guy down to save this trooper. Fantastic story, Wow, Definitely winner.

Matt Fox: 9:53

That's how winning is done. So, dave, yes, you can go right, we can get back to it go ahead, go ahead.

David Wright: 9:55

So all right, you want to get that out? I?

Matt Fox: 9:56

had to get that out of the way. Yeah, right, so when you said that, timothy van nostra, was a timber truck. The first thing that came across my mind after hearing the title of the article. There's a little movie called final destination. You ever seen it, Yep.

David Wright: 10:14

And absolutely.

Matt Fox: 10:15

It wasn't there a piece of timber on a freeway somewhere. That's what went into my mind when I'm like probably the, even the shooter was like, uh no, I'm just going to stop. I don't want that coming at me.

David Wright: 10:27

No thank you Interesting. I'll give you another sidebar, probably something very more obscure than Final Destination, but it's a Stephen King novel the Gunslinger series, the Dark Tower series, whole sequence where this logging truck, there's this gunfight going on in this gas station between the gunslinger and this. This bunch of hoodlums okay, you know, a bunch of hooligans, if you want to call them that this sounds like sorry something for the authorities in detroit hit the wrong one.

David Wright: 11:04

Sorry, let that play through so anyway, in the stephen king story that the series of novels there is a scene where they're having a shootout at this gas station with a bunch of hoodlums and the gunslinger in this, this uh logging truck comes by in in skids and all the logs come flying off of the truck, oh boy, you know and taking out some of the some of the henchmen, if you want to call? It that the hoodlums, if you want to call it that.

Announcer: 11:26

Oh, we're not done yet.

David Wright: 11:27

Oh, no, no I know it's a long one. We're gonna get there because I gotta please no, I just that's what I thought of.

Matt Fox: 11:37

I thought of, you know, timber truck. I'm thinking freeway, thinking gun shooting, things going off, am I okay?

David Wright: 11:44

yeah, okay, yeah, and you know he's fighting a bunch of hooligans.

Announcer: 11:49

This sounds like something for the authority.

David Wright: 11:53

I hit the right button.

Announcer: 11:54

It's misaligned Something's off on my soundboard, never mind.

David Wright: 11:57

We'll get back to it. We'll come back to it. So, anyway, we're talking today. We're continuing with our therapy Q&A. We'll get off the logging thing for a while we're done with that.

David Wright: 12:06

Yes, yeah, it's crazy. I don't know what's going on. So we covered in the last episodes some of the things we talked about and you can go back and jump on those if you want. Why should I speak to a therapist instead of a friend? We talked about Getting prepared. How do I know when to see a therapist, right? How do I find a therapist? How?

Matt Fox: 12:31

much does therapy cost? I remember all that, yes.

David Wright: 12:35

Does my insurance cover therapy? We talked about that, yes, and then we talked about doing therapy online. And then we talked about what type of therapist. Then we went through the flow chart as far as licensing. See, here's the thing Most people will see a person, especially if they're a medical professional. There's a bunch of initials after their name. Nobody knows what those things mean. Just to reemphasize on that last one that we ended on last week is that anybody who's a therapist at least has a master's degree in some sort of either psychology, social work or counseling. So they're all master's level clinicians. So that's the main thing to take from that.

David Wright: 13:19

So we're going to start today by going on to our next question, which is how should I prepare for my first therapy session? And actually that is a question that probably is not asked by a lot of people. Typically, they go and they just think, oh, I need to see a therapist, I'm just going to go. But there are some things that you can do to prepare yourself. Now we talked about in one of these categories about being honest. That's number one Prepare to be honest when you go.

David Wright: 13:51

But here's a whole thing that you can do ahead of time, before your first session. Make a list. Make a list of specific topics and issues that you want to cover that you feel like that you're having a hard time with. So what happens typically when you go in to meet a therapist? You're meeting a stranger for the first time. You meet them, you sit down and then you start talking, and a lot of people.

David Wright: 14:15

It takes a while to get comfortable, especially if it's a therapist you've never met before. Again, it's a stranger essentially and you're now revealing your deepest, darkest issues and secrets, and that can't be easy sometimes. So writing down a list will keep you on track and keep you focused on the things that you want to address. So say that you're having feelings of depression and anxiety or maybe you have anger issues. It's important to address those right in the beginning, right up front, because this is what will happen in a therapy session. The intake is a lot of questions. It's a lot of gathering information from the client. So me, as a therapist, I try to gather as much information as I can in that intake session and then we can use that to develop goals later to address during our therapy time together, however long that lasts.

Matt Fox: 15:05

I think we may have spoken about it, but don't wait until you're at the last straw.

David Wright: 15:11

Well, that's a great point, Matt, and that's one thing that's not really spelled out in the list I have. But that is a good one, because most of the time I'll be honest, most of the time, once we get a call, people are in crisis typically Not always. A are in crisis, right, typically Not always. A lot of times, a lot of times, it's like they've tried or whatever they've tried. They may have tried nothing, it doesn't matter, but the point is that most people call to get therapy when things are really at the crisis mode.

David Wright: 15:39

And, yes, you're right, get in earlier. Yeah, that's the best way I can say it because, listen and I say this to clients every day everybody's effed up, everybody has issues they can deal with, everybody can benefit from talking to a therapist. So don't wait till a crisis to address this, because a lot of these crises can be averted if you are proactive in therapy, if you do it ahead of time, just to make sure you're in a good head space and a good emotional space to deal with issues that are happening to you or in the world.

Matt Fox: 16:13

And that's a great way to prepare Absolutely To, you know, for a therapy is just be prepared, you know, find one that you are comfortable with, so you're not having to interview.

David Wright: 16:24

That's. That's the other issue, that issue that you have to find the right therapist, and we'll get into that. That's actually the next one coming up we're going to talk about All right, good, but the other thing, as far as preparing, you have to speak your mind. In therapy, you have to say how you're feeling. Now, this can be a challenge for a lot of people because in some ways it's a sign of weakness to say, oh yeah, I'm really sad or I'm really angry or I'm really frustrated it. It and especially and I'm going to make a generalization men, don't, don't hit me or anything but typically with men that's a much harder thing to do just talk about emotions typically. Generally there are exceptions to every rule, but typically women are better at talking about emotions. Oh yeah, so for men, just be prepared that this is the place to, to share your emotions.

Matt Fox: 17:15

This is a place that that we can help you for for for a man and generalization here for men it's difficult to talk about emotions. Yeah, it's not because we don't have them. It's because it's tough for men to verbalize how they feel because they have all these thoughts and feelings and opinions about certain things, but they can't verbalize how they feel. Seeing a therapist talking to somebody will help you to learn how to verbalize and regret and to really get your message across. Absolutely, if you will.

David Wright: 17:52

Yes and in in in. The whole idea of therapy is is to get you to a better place so that that one you can communicate better. That that's that's. Another big thing is, a lot of mental health issues have to do with communication and not expressing how you feel, especially in relationships or especially in family situations. So just be prepared. You need to speak your mind and you need to tell the therapist what you're feeling, otherwise it's not going to work. And and and this is the this is the other dynamic that happens Sometimes you'll have a client come in and they'll be a little bit closed off because they're like I don't know if I can trust this person or not sure yet, and so you may spend a couple of sessions building rapport and building trust.

David Wright: 18:35

That's fine that you need to have that with a therapist, and if you can't get to that point, then then it's time and we'll. We'll talk about it in the next section. Am I I with the right therapist? And that's always a question, but the big thing is that you need to go into it open-minded, honest and ready to talk about the things that are bothering you. I love that, yes. So the next question leading into that how do I know if I've chosen the right therapist and that's a question a lot of people have, because they'll call a place like our. I'll talk about our facility because that's the one I know, because I own it and I run it. We have 10 therapists on our staff right now.

David Wright: 19:16

So somebody calls in they say, yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm dealing with depression or I'm dealing with anxiety. They get assigned to a therapist. Now that's just based on availability and schedule and issues PTSD, post-traumatic stress syndrome or something like bipolar, where you're having these big swings as far as depression and mania. But for the most part, the therapist that you're seeing. You have to connect with them on a personal level and that may not happen and it's not a therapist's fault, it's not the client's fault. Sometimes two people just don't click together, sure. So the big thing how to know if you've chosen the right therapist.

David Wright: 20:16

And again, it's important to feel comfortable and feel open in these sessions. So I'm going to give you a couple things. If you dread going to therapy, if you dread your sessions, it can be a red flag, not necessarily, because here's the thing with therapy we know we're going to be talking about serious things. We know we're going to be talking about things that are painful, some things that are hurt, that make you feel bad, but that's kind of the point of it, so you have to be ready about that. Feel bad, but that's kind of the point of it, so you have to be ready about that. Um so, if you're constantly dreading going to therapy or you're constantly canceling, you have to ask yourself why, what, what's, what's the issue here? Am I not ready to change? Do I, am I not committed to this? Or is do I not feel comfortable with the therapist?

David Wright: 21:03

I'm seeing that that's a that's a perfectly valid question but don't use that as the as an excuse, every single time well, and that's the whole thing, because if it's not clicking with the therapist you're seeing, it's it's.

David Wright: 21:15

It's on you as the client to say to whatever facility you're you're going to, I'm not feeling it with this therapist, can I get somebody else? Sure that that? Believe me, not enough people do that. They feel like they're stuck with who they were given Right and if it's not working, they don't feel that they can make changes or or or switch therapists. But as a client, it's it's incumbent on you to make the choice that's best for yourself. Yeah, okay, um, if you, if you're excited for sessions, if you, if you're looking forward to seeing your therapist, that's a good thing because you feel like you're getting somewhere, it feels like you're making progress, it feels like you're making change, and when you have productive sessions, that just kind of reinforces that oh, I'm making progress here, I feel like things are changing, and that's definitely something that you need to feel in therapy.

Matt Fox: 22:12

Can I ask you a very layman term?

David Wright: 22:14

Absolutely, or a layman question Uh-huh.

Matt Fox: 22:16

So typically men are more comfortable with a male therapist and female are more comfortable with a female therapist, or does it really matter? Or is it just based on that rapport that you build?

David Wright: 22:29

it. It's based on rapport and and again, this is not a one size fits all or generality. Um, a lot of women prefer to speak to men. Now there can be all kinds of and I it'd be interesting and I may look for this to see if there are any studies done on on whether female and male clients prefer a gender when they go to therapy.

David Wright: 22:50

I'm curious, I was just thinking. For example, I have a lot of clients and this kind of fits into the population as a whole. More women go to therapy than men. That's just the data. That's what the data tells us. A lot of women want to speak to a male therapist. Now that could lead back to maybe they're having, maybe they had father issues growing up, maybe they having issues with their, with their spouse.

David Wright: 23:20

I see a lot of women in my practice and and and for them to have a and this is not pumping myself up, I mean I'm not like bragging. Oh good for you, but a lot of women want to have a good male interaction. Okay, okay. So for them, that is something they prefer. Now, a lot of times, yeah, people have a preference. Um, my therapist is a woman, but but it wasn't by. I wasn't thinking I want a woman or I want a man to way, sure, yeah, and for me.

Matt Fox: 23:58

I don't have a different. I mean I don't have necessarily a preference.

David Wright: 24:10

I just want somebody who's good. Yeah, yeah, absolutely so. Knowing if your therapist is a good fit, that is the main thing. Whether it's man or woman, it doesn't matter, even if it's their personality you just don't like For you, you have to take care of yourself, sure, sure.

Matt Fox: 24:30

And as a therapist yourself, I'm sure you have a cadence of questions that you ask a new client every time. Are there any questions like a cadence, that a patient would have to get to know their therapist a little bit better so they can be more honest?

David Wright: 24:45

No, that's good. So let me give you my, my, my spiel first, and then I'll tell you kind of what clients might say. So for me, anytime I have a new client, I always emphasize listen, there's nothing, you're you're, you're not, abnormal, so to speak. And and and I always say, normal doesn't exist in therapy.

David Wright: 25:06

No, it doesn't it doesn't typical, might exist, but that's not the same thing. Sure, I don't think anyone's normal per se. Everybody has something that they can improve on or work on. So that's the first thing. And then, as far as what I say to them, I'm like listen, during this process we need to have a, have a working relationship. So if at any point you feel like I'm just not it or I don't feel like this is working, I always tell clients, I tell them specifically you need to tell me this isn't really working. Okay, help me understand so you can pivot and move in a different direction.

David Wright: 25:44

Yes, with more information, we can take a different approach. Absolutely, and again that's incumbent on the client to say I don't feel like this is working. So it can either be an issue with the therapist, it could be an issue with how therapy is going, sure, but definitely the client is in control. The client dictates where we're going and you have to speak up as a client if something's not working for you Because you've built that rapport, you're comfortable with your therapist.

Matt Fox: 26:21

You know, mr and Mrs, it just doesn't. This line, this direction I'm going, is the best fit. Yeah, can, can we make a change? Can?

Announcer: 26:30

we go in a different direction.

Matt Fox: 26:31

As a therapist, you should be yes, absolutely yes. Which direction do you feel you need to?

David Wright: 26:36

go. Here's the catch on that matt and, and I've seen it, a lot of therapists take it personally and I I've said I we have a lot of. We have a lot of therapists. We have 10 therapists in our office. Some are younger, some are older, some are just starting out. We have an intern that just started with us a couple weeks ago. So, with somebody like an intern, I say to them listen, you're the professional I know, you just finished school. You're not licensed yet, but you are, you're in the end stage of your degree. You're in the yet, but but you, you are, you're in the end stage of your, your degree.

David Wright: 27:08

You're in the end stage of being licensed, so you're the professional. A lot of times with therapists the problem is the therapists are not confident. If the therapist is not confident, it's not going to work well with a client.

Matt Fox: 27:23

They need to see somebody about building up their confidence.

David Wright: 27:26

Absolutely. And, again, I am a thousand percent believer that every therapist should have a therapist. Yeah, absolutely, because of what we deal with every day, we deal with people with different issues and different things, and all of these things coming at you, you need to have somebody for you to talk to to keep your own mental health up to date. Yeah, because otherwise, if you're in poor mental health, you're not going to be able to help the people you're seeing. Right, that's a key. So, yeah, make sure your therapist is a good fit. If it's not, you need to speak up and say we need to do something different, or I need a different therapist, yep. The next question is how do I keep making progress in therapy? So here's kind of a scenario that happens fairly often. I wouldn't say a majority of the time, but a good percentage People will come in, they'll come for two or three sessions and then they just disappear.

Matt Fox: 28:22

Well, okay.

David Wright: 28:23

So, and it's hard, and typically what we'll do is we'll try to, you know, reach out. The therapist typically will reach out and say hey, I haven't seen you in a few weeks, what's going on? You want to make an appointment? Sometimes they'll just say no. So a lot of times people will get into therapy and for whatever reason and there are some reasons and I can throw a couple of those out in a moment but you have to work through the whole, the whole process of therapy. Now I'm not saying three sessions are not going to benefit you. They could very well benefit, sure they could.

David Wright: 28:56

But at some point you have to feel like I've achieved something or I've reached the goals that I'm looking for. So, with every client and every therapist, we have a treatment plan and we have goals in those treatment plans and maybe, maybe that goal is okay. Client will report, will evaluate their level of depression on a 10 point scale, one being not at all, 10 being the absolute worst. Okay. So a goal might be, or an objective might be client will go three months with a a level of four or less on the depression scale, just so it's something that we can evaluate. So if you go those you know a month and you're still at a seven or an eight, then you got to kind of see well, is this really working, is this, is this, is this going to help me at some point? I mean, you just have to kind of look and say if there's not progress, then we need to change something. Sure, yeah.

David Wright: 29:54

So as far as making progress, the important things are sticking with it. Therapy is going to be uncomfortable at times. Sure, because you're talking about emotions, you're talking about events, especially people who have had past traumas childhood abuse, sexual abuse, physical abuse, people who have bipolar disorder or major depression and have suicidal attempts or been hospitalized. Therapy is going to be a long-term process for a lot of these clients. So the important thing is that you stick with it, as long as you have the right therapist and you feel like it's helping. Stay the course. Now, that might be six months, it might be five years. Every client's different. Some clients need to have a therapist all the time, and that's fine because it's their self-care ritual. So I have clients that I've been seeing for years. We realize that they're probably I say this very carefully they're probably never going to get to where they want to be. But if they're not in the space they were, they're better.

Matt Fox: 31:06

I don't have a medical degree. I never claimed to be a doctor, but you said stay the course. I almost want to say stay your course, because you're in charge of your own therapy. Absolutely you put, you get out of it what you put into it, absolutely. That's where being honest, being prepared, knowing what you want to approach and talk about, and then have the moral dexterity to say this isn't working, doc, and I really appreciate your work. Can we talk? Can we move in a different direction?

David Wright: 31:35

Absolutely.

Matt Fox: 31:36

And that's on the patient. Yes, so that's why you stay your course, yep, absolutely.

David Wright: 31:43

So we talk about making progress. So one of the things that a lot of therapists will do, including myself, is we'll give homework assignments. I'll say okay. For somebody who's depressed I'll say okay, listen, we know it's not feasible for you to go to the gym every day for two hours.

David Wright: 32:00

It's just too much you can try. So what I say to people is I want you to take 15 minutes a day and just walk. Just get out, get out of your house. To take 15 minutes a day and just walk. Just get out, get out of your house, get out of your room, get out of your apartment, wherever you're at, and just walk for 15, 20 minutes In negative four wind chill. Well, today might be an exception, but you know what I'm saying. Get a treadmill.

Announcer: 32:23

Yeah.

David Wright: 32:23

No, no, don't shut me up, but so if I give somebody that homework assignment and I talked to him the next week, I'm like, well, how is your walk in me going? Oh, I didn't do it, so it's, it's incumbent again I use that word three times now on the client to follow through on these homework assignments because they're there for a reason. Now you might say, oh, what's a 15-minute walk going to do? It will do something. We're starting to change behaviors is what we're trying to do, and we start that in small increments.

Matt Fox: 33:02

And the question is well, help me understand why you neglected, why you didn't, why you didn't.

David Wright: 33:06

Why did you neglect to do that? I'll give you an answer, matt. That comes back many times. I'm too depressed, but you're there for a reason. Well, no, I get it, but here's the struggle, here's the back and forth. If somebody is severely depressed, they have zero motivation, zero. It's everything they can do to get out of bed. So I understand the difficulty in it, but this is the pattern that we're trying to interrupt. Is this pattern that we're trying to change? Is that, listen, just give me 15 minutes, that's it. That's where we're starting Now. If I come back in a week and somebody says, yeah, I've been walking every day for 15 or 20 minutes, I'm like, all right, let's bump that up to 30 minutes and then we're going to add some other things as we go along. Sure, so we're building upon, we're trying to build habits that are going to help people feel better.

David Wright: 34:00

So to make good progress in therapy, you need to follow up on these homework assignments. As difficult as they may be, there's a purpose for them. Follow through, yes, another good way to Follow through. Therapist every other week. I had to cancel because I was sick at the beginning or second week of December, then the holidays, then the new year, then back to work. So I've been like six weeks off of my therapist and me as a therapist. I'm saying this because this happens to people all the time. They get busy, they get overwhelmed, they stop coming Even though they know they should be coming. You have to stay consistent with your therapy sessions. That is the big thing. And I want to go back to the point and I think I hit a little bit on this. But sometimes therapy is not pleasant. Sometimes you're going to be a good therapist is going to point out flaws in thinking or flaws in behavior, flaws is a is a harsh word.

Matt Fox: 35:17

I want to say challenge.

David Wright: 35:19

Better, better, matt. Yes, I agree with that.

Matt Fox: 35:21

Yes, the point out challenges they're going to get your therapist should challenge you. Yes, right. And if they're not challenging you to change behaviors. Change habits, then at what point do you like? Okay, this is not working. I'm not being motivated enough, right, because sometimes, yes, it's going to fall on the patient, sure, right, but is the therapist not challenging you enough, as the patient, to get better?

David Wright: 35:46

And this is the conversation that has to be had in therapy. Therapy is not a one-way street. No, of course not. It's a client and a therapist interacting and together figuring out what is going to be the best course of action. Love that, what is going to take us forward and get better. Yeah, that is the whole thing. It's a collaboration. It's not one person. Therapists don't have answers. I thought this was a good question collaboration.

Matt Fox: 36:14

It's not one person. Therapists don't have answers. I thought that's why we were sitting here man.

David Wright: 36:18

No, I mean, therapists don't have any answers. The thing is that we're we're trained to help people find their own answers. That's what we do. We don't have the answers, we help you find your answers. That is therapy. And if a therapist, if therapist, is telling you what to do, that that's a red flag. Boom, yeah, just proceed with caution. Sure Is what I'll say. So so the big thing, and the big thing with therapy as far as just being thing, and the big thing with therapy as far as just being committed to it, that's the big thing.

David Wright: 36:57

Here's the thing when people come to therapy, typically they're not happy. That's that's what drives people to therapy. They're not happy for whatever reason, whether it's a relationship, whether it's their own self-esteem, whether it's their own life issues or things that are happening. And I don't say this in a condescending manner, but life is a series of experiences. Some are good, some are bad. That's just the way life goes.

David Wright: 37:21

So you have to be able to deal with the bad things, because they're going to be there, they're going to happen. You can't avoid that in life. You're going to lose people to death. You're going to have arguments and falling outs with with relationships. That's going to happen. Sure, it's a fact, you're going to have challenges financially, you're going to have challenges with your job sometimes. Sure, these are normal life events and I and I and when I say normal it's I'm saying typical, but but these things are going to happen. So how can we equip you to handle those negative things when they come up? That is the key thing, because they will come up, you can't avoid them, and many people will be. Instead of addressing those issues, they'll withdraw. Sure, they'll back off and just say I can't handle it, I'm not going to do anything, which, honestly, most of the time that makes things worse. Yeah, inaction is the same as sabotage, sure, yeah, I, just I.

Matt Fox: 38:23

I want to quote one of my more favorite folks from the dj industry yeah, and it's the, in the immortal words of Casey Kasem oh, Casey Kasem. Keep your feet on the ground yeah, and keep reaching for the stars yeah, because you have. You have to understand that. You have to stay grounded, but you have to always strive to want to get better.

David Wright: 38:44

And and that is the big thing, and that's the biggest thing when you're talking about therapy, is that you called and made this appointment because you're not happy. You're not happy with what things are. So something has to change. And that is the big thing with people They'll come to therapy but they don't realize, oh, I have to change. Yeah, and that sometimes freaks people out. I'm perfect, dave, I don't know what you're talking about. Well, you are man. It's crazy.

David Wright: 39:21

I don't know what you're talking about. Well, you are man. It's crazy. I don't know what happened. No, I know everyone's effed up man. I get that Everybody is. Yes, it's just a fact. That's how life works. So we want to be able to get you through life in the best way possible to live your best life. That's what a therapist is there for, and if they can help you, that is the key thing. And you have to take ownership of your own mental health. The therapist is not the answer. The therapist helps you to get to the answer Stay your course.

David Wright: 39:47

Stay the course. Do what you need to do to get yourself better, mm-hmm.

Matt Fox: 39:52

All righty, oh man, that was, that's it matt, that was intense.

David Wright: 39:55

That was, that was intense. Um, that wraps up therapy q a, man part. This was part three. Four that was part three, part three. That was part three. So we're good with um. Therapy q a. We're going to be back next week. I have a special guest next week. Terica Lewis is a therapist in my office. She's a certified sex therapist. Oh fun, she's going to be in the studio next Monday night and we're going to talk about sex. Okay, well, game on. That's a great tease, isn't it?

Matt Fox: 40:28

Ba-dum-bum. Well, I'll just have to. Oh, great Odin's Raven, I'll have to start selling tickets then.

Announcer: 40:38

Sexy time yeah.

Matt Fox: 40:41

I'll have to start selling tickets so we can have an audience.

David Wright: 40:43

Here we go. Well, we're going to have an audience on Facebook Live because I already Terica's a good friend of mine. We've been working together for 10-15 years. She's a great fit. Best therapist in my office. Um yeah, we will.

Matt Fox: 40:55

One of the best. Yes.

Announcer: 40:56

Yes.

David Wright: 40:57

One of the best. Yes, she's great. Um, I love her. So, before we go, who is it? Little bit, little bit, what little bit is the name of this dog? Are you kidding me Right? Dog dog rescue? It's a retriever mix, female. She'll be 60 to 70 pounds, full grown. She's dog friendly. Yes, kid friendly. Yes, cat is unknown. Um, she was born october 2024 so she's four months old.

Matt Fox: 41:26

Oh, there's a little bit goodness, holy shmoli, oh, my goodness.

Announcer: 41:34

Holy shmoly, I'm sorry.

Matt Fox: 41:34

I was looking at the white fur thing.

Announcer: 41:36

That's not the dog. That's not the dog.

Matt Fox: 41:38

That's her toy. I'm just kidding Lil Bit, I've never heard of that.

David Wright: 41:48

I've never heard that name before. Lil Bit, come, lil' Bit, lil' Bit, come here. Lil' Bit, lil' Bit. Where are you? Lil' Bit? I'm going to rest for a little bit. Do it a time, lil' Bit.

Matt Fox: 42:01

Come and get a kiss Lil' Bit.

Announcer: 42:03

What kind of stupid wiener name is that Lil' Bit.

David Wright: 42:08

Lil' Bit needs a home. She's at DetroitDogRescuecom. Slash adopt.

Matt Fox: 42:13

Check it out.

David Wright: 42:15

A little bit. She wants a home.

Matt Fox: 42:21

She wants somebody to snuggle with and play with her white lamb. Those ears are just. I know that left ear her right ear, is just killing me. I know it's so cute.

David Wright: 42:28

Yeah, it's so great. All right, detroitdogrescuecom slash. Adopt Little bit. She needs a home. Little bit, go get her. Yes, all righty folks, we are done. Join me next episode and next week on Facebook Live, as we're going to have Terica Lewis in the office, my therapist I work with. She's a certified sex therapist. Can she sit next to me? She can, she can sit right there, man, yep, fantastic.

Announcer: 42:54

I can't start selling tickets.

Matt Fox: 42:55

I'm excited for next week. What are you people On dope? I don't know if she'll want to sit next to me. No, no, she'll be fine.

David Wright: 43:02

All right, all right, all righty folks. Change your thinking, change your life. Laugh hard, run fast. We'll see you next time