Why Your Healthy Habits Never Stick After Menopause (And What Actually Works)

If you've ever found yourself saying, "I'll start again on Monday," this episode is for you.

So many women believe they lack motivation or willpower when the truth is something completely different.

In this episode, I share the stories of two clients who transformed their health—even through some of life's biggest challenges—and reveal why they succeeded where so many diets and health plans fail.

You'll discover:

✨ Why healthy habits have to work when life gets busy—not just when everything is going well.

✨ The surprising mindset shift that makes healthy choices feel easier instead of becoming another battle with yourself.

✨ Why focusing on one habit at a time is the fastest way to create lasting change.

If you're tired of feeling like you've "failed" and want to build habits that genuinely stick, this episode will completely change the way you think about creating a healthy lifestyle. It isn't about having more discipline. It's about building habits—and a mindset—that support you for life.

Feel Like Yourself Again

with Dr Orlena's 14-Day Menopause Habits That Stick Sprint
A 14-day doctor-led sprint helping women in menopause stop starting over, build lasting habits and feel more like themselves again.

STARTS AUGUST 3rd

: https://www.drorlena.com/menopause 

Sign up for the Stop Dieting and Start Thriving Video: 

https://www.drorlena.com/stop-dieting

Looking for support? Book a free call with Dr Orlena: 

https://www.drorlena.com/book-a-call-dr-o 

Transcript

My client's father died. She spent six weeks in hospital corridors instead of her kitchen, and she came out the other side healthier than when it started. Today, I want to tell you why. Hello, I am Dr. Orlena. I am a medical doctor and health coach, and I help women over 40 to stop fighting their bodies and to feel healthy, confident, and like themselves a de- although, excuse me, like themselves again.

And look at me with a brand new microphone. Woo-hoo. I guess you can't see it unless you're watching the video, but perhaps your ears are going, "Oh, this sounds amazing." Today I want to talk about a couple of my clients. I'm gonna change their names just so that if you ever join my program in the future, you-- or if you bump into them, the world's a big place, I suspect you won't, but just to protect their confidentiality a little bit.

So Hannah walked into my program feeling defeated. Not dramatically overweight, [00:01:00] but sluggish. She'd put on weight, and in her words, it didn't seem to matter what she ate, nothing made a difference. She had also developed acid reflux and on on top of that. She had no framework, just a sense, a nagging sense of why do I feel so dreadful with no answer.

Energy was low, motivation lower, and exercise was something that she had struggled with for years, not for lack of trying, but because she hadn't found anything that she really liked doing. Now, over the course of working together, sadly, her father became unwell and sadly passed away. So it was a really stressful time for her.

But what she managed to do over that time was maintain, not perfection, but plan B. So instead of going to total disaster, she managed to maintain things that, in her words weren't a disaster. Now, she didn't manage to do the exercise because it [00:02:00] just wasn't possible. But she did, throughout that period of time, A, feel supported, and B, also knew that she was working, eating in a way that was nourishing her body and having an impact on her body.

And by the end of the program, she said to me, "I have so much more energy. I'm feeling so much more like myself, and I am excited to look forward to keep going. I know I've got to implement some more things, but I've got a plan for that, and I know what to do, and I am confident that I can just keep doing it."

And today I want to talk about the key piece that makes that different. But before I do that, I want to tell you about another client called Amy. And Amy also, when she came to me, was desperate. She was just really [00:03:00] Absolutely desperate, facing another medical procedure that she didn't want. And she said to me last week, "I don't know I seem to be getting more attraction from men, and I don't know whether that's because I've got more confidence or because I feel like I look better in my body, or perhaps a bit of both, but I am thinking of dipping my toe in the dating scene."

And that is absolutely huge. Such an amazing transformation from feeling like nobody would want me. I don't want to go there because I don't feel happy with myself, and I don't want to be judged." Now, why am I telling you this? Both of these ladies have had amazing transformations. They have gone from feeling frustrated and overwhelmed and stuck to this place where you feel freer and more confident, and know that [00:04:00] what you are doing is having an impact on your health and wellness.

And that doesn't mean that, there aren't more changes that they can make, but that they have got past that constantly trying to restart again on Monday thinking, "Oh, nothing works. I'm here again." And then you feel that guilt and that despondency and lack of motivation. And they have got to this place where they know what to do, they can keep doing it, and yes, they might want to implement more things in the future Essentially, they are building habits.

And here's the hard truth about habits. If your habits only work when life is calm and everything is perfect, they're not actually habits. Habits are the things that happen when life is busy lifing. So when life throws you a curveball, those things that you are doing, those are your habits. [00:05:00] And the reality is, it takes time to build those habits, and the way I look at it is we have what I call little baby habits, acorn habits, then we have sapling habits, and then we have what I call oak tree habits.

Those oak tree habits are so strong in your life that they just happen automatically. You don't have to think about them. You just do them. And what happens to a lot of people is that they think that they're building a habit, and they're like, "Okay, I'm focusing on this habit. I'm focusing on this habit," and then life happens, everything goes out of the window, and then a few months later on they go, "Oh my goodness, I forgot to do this habit.

I'm a failure." Now, the reality of that situation is it wasn't a habit. It was an acorn habit, and you hadn't got it to an oak tree habit. And so when people say to me, "Oh, I'm demotivated. Nothing happens. I [00:06:00] c- you know, nothing works for me," it's because one of the reasons is because they are mistaking acorn habits for oak tree habits.

And the reality is whatever it wasn't a habit. And where I want to get you to is all of the things that I'm doing, the way I'm eating, the way I'm exercising, the way I'm sleeping, and my mindset, I have these solid oak tree habits that are supporting my health and wellness so that I've got loads of energy, I feel like myself, I feel comfortable in my body.

I'm confident that I am doing all the things that I want to do to get to that... so that when I'm older, I am strong and healthy and looking after myself. I'm leading a long and healthy, vibrant life, and it's just happening automatically. I don't have to think about it. But what happens is there's this bridge in between that I call the rickety bridge, and on that rickety bridge, you set down.

You're like, "Yep, I'm gonna do this [00:07:00] thing." And you set off and you do it, and life gets busy, and ping, you end up back at your old habit. And that's when you feel broken and demoralized and nothing works for me. Now, how do we change that? How did these ladies change that? And the answer is, there are lots of things.

There are how we think about things, there is our emotions, and obviously what we do is also important. But the big piece that people miss when they're looking at this is how we think about things. When you are stuck in this place of, "I have to keep starting over every Monday, and nothing works for me," there's a lot of blame, there's a lot of, "It's not working.

W- why would I bother doing this if it's not working? It's my fault." And really, where the work is unraveling all of this. And when you're thinking about habits, it might be that you're trying to do the wrong [00:08:00] habit. You're trying to fit a habit that you don't enjoy, doesn't fit into your life, and you're trying to push yourself to do this habit that, yeah it's not the right habit, or that you haven't given yourself space to actually give that habit a go.

But the secret about all of this is how we think about things. And when we let go of blame and frustration and overwhelm and step into this place of, "Hey, this is the situation I find myself in. I'm accepting the situation. I'm not painting it, with rose-tinted glasses. This is where I am.

This is the work that I need to do. This is what I need to implement. What's my next best step? How do I take a step forwards? How do I focus on my health and wellness? What are those habits that I'm going to do?" Once you do that, and you find habits that you enjoy doing, you keep doing them, and you keep doing them.

And it is the [00:09:00] overlooked piece that so many people miss. So many people who work with me say, "Oh, I used to just focus on the nutrition or the exercise piece, and I would just, put all my effort into pushing myself to go to the gym or making sure that I cut out chocolate or sugar or croissants or whatever it was.

Really push, pushing myself." And that does not have the desired results, and here's why. Think about teaching a child to ride a bike, and you can do this in a couple of ways. And you might be someone who goes "You are a failure. You are hopeless. You are never gonna do this. Just let's not bother." I know, I'm exaggerating, I get it.

Or you could be someone who's really enthusiastic and positive, and you might say, "Oh, you're doing so good. Look, you just need to keep pedaling. I can see that you've got this. Now, this is the brake. You can do this. Oh, you didn't manage it that time. [00:10:00] Pick yourself up and do it again. Pick yourself up and do it again.

Pick yourself up and do it again." Now, which of those two is going to get the results? And the answer is probably the second one, the one who is encouraging and helping the child want to do it as opposed to beating the person down. And that's exactly what's happening in your brain. When you are there blaming yourself and thinking, "Nothing works for me, and this is really frustrating, and I am totally overwhelmed," there's a part of your brain that's going, "Let's not bother.

It doesn't matter. It's not gonna have an impact anyhow." But when you reposition your brain, you get to that stage of, "Yeah, this is the thing that I'm doing and I'm enjoying it, and I understand why I'm doing it. It is gonna have an impact. It is something that I have chosen that I know will have an impact, even if it's a small thing."

It might be just something small like going for a two-minute walk after dinner. Yes, that's gonna have an impact. Not one day, but [00:11:00] if you do it every single day, yes. So the keys are understanding what habits fit in with your life, and secondly, how you think about what you are doing and why you are doing it, which is basically mindset.

So exciting stuff, and here's what's even more exciting. I understand that so many people are stuck in this place of, "It's not gonna work. I can't do anything." And I have conversations with people every single week, and so many people are like, "Yeah, I get this, but I don't trust myself. I think your program sounds amazing, but I can't do this because I know that I'm not somebody who can maintain these habits because I've got this history, and I know that I just basically don't do it for a period of time.

I fail, and I've got this pattern. So it's not about you and your program, it's that I don't trust myself." And it's [00:12:00] almost like people need to work on their mindset before they join my program or make changes. It doesn't have to be about my program. It can be about just doing it by yourself. So what I have put together is the Menopause Habits That Stick Sprint.

Now, don't worry, it's not a sprint in terms of you have to go and do some running, although you can if you want to, but the sprint bit isn't about running. It's a focused two weeks where we are looking at your mindset. It's all about mindset. So at the end of the program You are thinking, "I am somebody who can do this.

I understand what is going on, and yes, I can create habits, and those habits are going to have a big impact. They're gonna help me feel like myself, finally get to that place that I want to, where I'm feeling strong and healthy, and knowing that I'm doing all of this stuff to look after myself. Finally get back to me."

It all starts [00:13:00] with these habits. And yes, normally it is more than one habit, but unless you're working with a coach, you don't really want to be focusing on more than one habit at a time. So by the end of this program, you're thinking, "Yeah, I can do this." And you can either go off and create those habits, or you can come and talk to me and I can help you m- create them more quickly.

But either is perfectly fine. And this two-week sprint is starting August the 3rd, and it's just gonna be two or three minutes a day of me sending you a video and really helping you change how you think about things. I had a client who started a few weeks ago, and we had an onboarding. Sorry, we didn't have an onboarding for various reasons until a week after she joined the program.

Now, normally when people join my program, Positively Healthy You, they have that onboarding within the first 48 hours. But it was when I was away, so it was a week afterwards. And I had given her a mindset [00:14:00] trick to do, and she said, "Oh my goodness, I haven't even started this program, but this little shift has really helped me just make healthy decisions, even just in the last week before we've even started the program."

And yes, I will be including that in the two-week sprint. Now, I want as many people as possible to join this program, so it is just $29. Yes, $29 and there's a money ga-- B-- No, excuse me, money back guarantee, so you have nothing to lose. Come and join the Menopause Habits That Stick Sprint so that you can get to feeling amazing, having energy, knowing that you are doing healthy, amazing you.

It all starts with your mindset and how you think about things. And yes, you can change how you think about things. And yes, you totally can get to that place where it is all automatic and you've got these healthy habits that are supporting your long-term health and [00:15:00] wellness and weight loss, if that is applicable.

So my friends, I'm excited. Next time I'm on the podcast, we will have started the sprint. So I will see you in two weeks, and I look forward to seeing you in the Habit Sprint as well.