Date with Cents
Date with Cents
My Personal Dating Strategy for 2026
Most women are out here dating without any kind of plan….just swiping and hoping something works out, going on dates and hoping he's the one. But hope is not a strategy. Hope is how you end up years into this with nothing to show for it.
In this episode, I'm breaking down my complete dating strategy for 2026—and it's totally different from last year. You'll discover what I'm letting go of (including dating for physical attraction and feeling sorry for men), the three skills I'm sharpening at a higher level, and why working with a former sugar baby as my mentor is going to make me a better coach for you.
Work with me to stop dating without direction and start getting the results you actually want.
Book a sales call HERE to learn more about private 1:1 coaching with me.
Learn more about private 1:1 coaching with me. Book a sales call HERE to speak with me.
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@torahcents
@curved2cuffed
What's up, love a girl? Welcome back to the podcast in 2026. Hey girl.
SPEAKER_00:Happy New Year. And if you're new here, my name is Torah. And I am your coach for helping you. You high achieving woman of faith. You recovering good girl.
SPEAKER_01:I am here to help you create the romantic constellation that you desire in this new year. I'm here to help you build a rotation of two to three men who serve and support you and who are serious about pursuing you for serious commitment. I am here to help you ask for what you want while dating these men and also getting it. I am here to help you unlearn all of the shame and the blame that you feel coming from your traditional religious upbringing that did not get seeped into the minds of your uh counterparts, your male counterparts, so that you can actually live a life that you love and love uh the life that you live. Especially when it comes to romance. But yeah, that's my spill. I'm so happy. I had a really amazing break over the new years. I I literally not only did I like take a rest from the business, but I like really worked hard in my personal life in terms of like getting my 2026 dating strategy together. And I'm gonna this is what this podcast is about. I went, made sure I took brand new photos of myself over what the last two weeks. I've been learning makeup. I've hired a makeup artist to not only do my makeup, I've been having my makeup done like professionally, maybe like once a week for the past three weeks. And I've uh also have private sessions set up for me to actually learn the craft myself. Because one of the things that I want to, you know what, let me just get into the podcast. I'm already talking about my strategy. But yeah, I had a great time with the guys that I'm dating, uh, spending time with their families, doing, you know, just just really chill things. I went ice skating. Um, but yeah, I'm back. I'm back and ready to talk to y'all. So I wanted to talk to you guys about my personal dating strategy for 2026. And if you know me and if you work with me before as a client, if your current client, like you know how important it is to have a strategy. And I before I get into it, I just want to let you know, like, your strategy should not look like mine. Okay, I'm just gonna put that out there. I'm at a different space in my life, and I just want to put that just in case you hear my strategy. I'm like, oh my gosh, like, should I be doing that? Should I be? No, you should have your own specific strategy at your own specific level. Okay, but everybody should have a strategy, whether you're working with me as a client or not. You should have some way to track. Well, you should have one way to have a goal. You should have a goal for your love life. I recommend like at least two to three goals in the year in terms of your love life. You should have that. And you should have ways to like measure your progress. And you should have ways to solve any obstacle that comes in your way so that you're not, oh, I'm quitting, oh, I'm deleting the apps, oh, I'm done with men. Like, that's that's not an option. I don't care how much I get frustrated and pissed off, giving up is never an option. Like, absolutely no, no. Like, I'm I I have to be a winner. I always have to be a winner. That means I'll always have to figure things out. And I feel like if if you want the love that you desire in 2026, like you have to do the same thing.
SPEAKER_00:So I'm dating and I have a strategy.
SPEAKER_01:I'm not just putting myself out there, I have a strategy. I'm open to all kinds of crazy love this year, and I have a strategy with real intention behind what I'm doing and why I'm doing it. Most of us are out here dating without any kind of plan. We're just downloading the app, swiping, hoping something works out. We are accepting dates from men that we're attracted to and hoping things work out, hoping he's the one. We are, you know, trying to move things along with the guy that we like, just hoping things will click, even though we have to keep giving him chance after chance after chance after chance after chance. And look, I I get it.
SPEAKER_00:I've been there. But hope is not a strategy.
SPEAKER_01:Wishing and wanting and desiring is not a strategy. There's so many people who want this. There's so many people who want to be loved and want a relationship and want a marriage. No, no one cares. What are you gonna do about it? How committed are you to it? Because hope is how you end up years into dating, or years into wanting to be in a relationship and nothing to show for it and wondering what went wrong. Okay, so you should definitely have a strategy. So let's rewind a little bit and kind of talk about my strategy from last year. Coming into 2025, I had no, I had a rotate. I, well, the end of 2024, I had a rotation of three men that I was dating. I released one of these men during December of 2024. And in 2025, I had two guys that I was like, you know what? I am going to choose one of these guys to go exclusive with and more than likely marry. That was the goal. Like, get engaged, get married. 2025, I decided I was gonna get engaged based upon my rotation. So these guys were kind of like trying to find their place or to solidify their place in my life and ultimately like win me over. And a lot of you guys were watching everything. I was posting on my stories, on my Instagram, I was talking to my clients about how they were showing up on a on a monthly basis. I was like uh providing like a presentation, and like everybody was so excited. Like, who are you gonna choose, Torah? Which guy? And I said I was gonna choose in May in 2025. You can go back and listen to those podcast episodes if you're new here. And then I just decided, I said, I don't want to do this. The whole goal was to date them, to evaluate them, and to ultimately choose the one who could be my husband. And I know a lot of you guys are doing the same thing right now. You know, you're dating with marriage in mind, you're trying to figure out who's actually worth your time and your energy. And that's what I was doing, and then I decided that, you know, I'm number one, I don't think that, like, although these men are amazing, I don't think they align with me long term. And that things could possibly change. I'm only talking about a moment in time. Like, I don't make decisions off of potential. I don't make decisions like, oh, well, he could be the one. No, no, no, no, no, no. And so I said, you know what? I am going to actually not choose any of these guys and stretch myself to capacity. Stretch myself to see how much I can grow, how much more I can grow as a woman. I'm telling you, dating, dating is one of the best personal development, personal growth activities you can do. It's really, really hard to stay the same person if you use dating as a spiritual practice. I'm like, I just want to improve the woman that I am. I really want to see how far I can go in terms of my skills, my the way that I view myself as a woman. I want to shed more of my good girl layers that I have because, man, there's still residue there, you know, from all the conditioning. I just wanted to challenge myself there since I decided I wasn't going to choose any of these guys. And what came from that is my 2026 strategy. So now at the end of last year, I'm like, yeah, I'm I'm gonna do something different for 2026. I'm gonna, I don't, I I I ended 2025 so excited that I did not get engaged. Because I was gonna get engaged, get married, have a kid. I I was so excited by the end of 25. I was like, Torah, like, I'm so happy you didn't get into a relationship. That's not what you needed this year. It's not what you um, that's not what your soul needed this year. So, and I'm sharing this with you because number one, I want you to see what it actually looks like to be very intentional about your dating life, no matter what other people think, because people thought I was crazy. People saw all the things that those men were doing for me and how they were showing up for me. Hell, I'm still dating them. So people still see and they think that I'm crazy for not choosing them, right? I want to show you how it looks like to be intentional about your dating life, even when your intentions change and evolve, even when people disagree. And then also, I want to share in this episode like what I'm working on this year, that's gonna make me a better coach for you.
SPEAKER_00:No matter what you're dating for, no matter how you choose to date. Okay. So here's my strategy for 2026.
SPEAKER_01:Because when I decided to stop asking, ooh, which man fits me best, and I started asking, ooh, what life do I actually want to be living? That question changed so much for me because it really stopped me from thinking about like choosing a man to fit into my life as it currently was, and then more so about no, I I want to design the life that I actually want, and I'm still designing it, and then seeing who fits into that picture. Okay. Um, because y'all know previously I have been married and I left the marriage, but even though I left the marriage in 2021, I had to spend a lot of time figuring out who I wanted to be. So I'm still in the early stages of my newest evolution. Even though I've been gone since 2021, I had to deal with a lot of internal drama, dilemmas, shame around the whole thing. So I'm actually, this is new for me to be in this space of this level of evolution. So to jump into my strategy, for 2026, I am actually choosing to date for lifestyle and and less about love, right? Uh historically, I have dated for love, right? And I know some of y'all are like, what? Because I've I also I often preach I don't marry for love. I don't believe in marrying for love. And I still don't, I don't believe in marrying for love, but I do believe dating for love, right? Not but not going into a partnership legally because I love someone. I hope that's making sense, y'all. I don't wanna I don't wanna get into too deep into this episode, but I've been dating for love and um and I was open to dating various, a variety of kinds of men. And even if they didn't meet like one certain standard that I may have wanted them to have, let's just say they they were, let's just say they didn't make a certain account of money, but then I was like, okay, well, what can they do? What can they bring to the table? What can they offer me? You know what I mean? Like I was thinking of like all the ways that like I'm dating you, but I also need to benefit from the dating. So here is what I am going to choose to um to require from you since you can't meet that requirement. So that's how I would do it. I would like date all like date different kinds of men and say, oh, you don't meet this requirement, but you can meet that requirement. Or you don't meet this requirement, so you can meet you can do this for me. You can show up for me in this way, or you can show up for me in that way, and I can have all of these needs met. Well, um I'm actually not gonna be doing that in 2026. The men I will be entertaining this year are men who can support my lifestyle financially. There is no other way that I'm gonna be looking at it. There's no other, well, you know, he's not able to do that. No, my my focus isn't even securing dates, right? I'm I'm able to secure dates within 24 hours, right? That's not even that's not where I'm at. I'm this year I'm I'm securing the bag. That is my focus. I want to uh be dating men who can change my life at a moment's notice, men who can pay off all of my student loan debt on a weekday, you know, men who could buy me a car randomly, you know, men who could pay a monthly, you know, allowance that covers my personal expenses. Like that's the caliber of man that I'm positioning myself for this year. Like that is my focus. It's like a it's a side quest I want to do. I don't even know if I'm gonna do it for more than one year. It's just something that I truly desire that I don't wanna. I mentioned this on another podcast. Like, I don't want to be on my deathbed. I don't want to be on my deathbed and have never like went out and tried it because look, 2027, I could be dating for love again. I could, I don't, like, I'm not stuck to one form of dating. It's just this is my side quest. Um, and I want to experience it. Now, your strategy, you might be listening to this and you're like, oh my gosh, am I supposed to be doing this? No, you're supposed to be doing what you want to do. Okay. Your strategy might be totally different from mine, and it probably should be. Depending on where you're at in your dating journey, it probably should be way different than mine, and that's okay. Okay, you're probably dating for a husband or a committed boyfriend, or you're just simply looking for companionship and emotional connection, or you're just trying to learn the dating field. You're just trying to get out there and meet men. Whatever that is, it's fine. Because your strategy is yours and it should reflect what you actually want, not what I'm doing. I need to put this caveat in the podcast as you're listening to this and you thinking you should be doing this. But even though our goals might be different, whatever you're dating for, because this is how we're the same, right? Whatever you're dating for, you still need to be very, very clear about what you want. You still need to know how to communicate your standards. You still need to be uh in a position around the caliber of men that you want for your goals. You still need to stop apologizing for having expectations in the first place. So even though we might be going after different things, we're playing the same game with the same skills. The desk uh the destination is different, but how we get there looks pretty, pretty sit uh pretty similar. And that's what I want you to hear as you're listening to this. I I don't want, I don't sometimes people listen to this podcast and are taken out by certain things that I say. Or like even clients will listen. They come to the calls. Well, Torah, I should be doing this. No, you should be doing exactly what where you're at. Okay, so I just want to put that out there. But I am dating for lifestyle this year. I'm dating um not to be confused with um, you know, sugaring, not to be confused with escorting, right? Because I know people are listening to this podcast and are not exposed to the different ways that women date and how they date. Um, yeah, I'm simply dating for a lifestyle level up. Like if the man can't come into my life and change it significantly, I won't be dating him. So this year I'll be going on less dates. I'll be going on less dates because that's not the focus. Now, before I get into like more of what I'm building this year, I do want to mention what I am letting go of because sometimes, no, all the time what you stop doing matters, right? The things that you let go matter just as much as what you start doing. So, first, because I'm dating for a lifestyle, I am letting go like dating for physical attraction this year. Okay. I am dating for financial attraction first. And before you misunderstand what I'm seeing, I am not saying that looks don't matter to me. I am not saying that I'm ignoring looks. I'm just saying they're not my first filter anymore. Typically, what I do is, especially when I'm on a dating app, so I'm like, oh, I think he looks good. Okay, now let me read his bio. That type of thing, that's not me anymore. If I look at a photo, I don't like I'm not looking for initial attraction in the photos anymore. I'm going straight to the bio. I'm going straight, I'm like, oh, okay, this is what he does for a living. Oh, okay, like this is this is his lifestyle. Oh, I'm looking at these. Um, I'm not looking at his attractiveness in the picture as much as I'm looking at his lifestyle in the picture. Like, that's most important for me at this point in time. Okay. Um, and so going from, you know, looking at the pictures and asking, like, oh, is he cute? Am I attracted to him? Do I like the way he looks? I'm just going straight to the bio. What does he do? What's his capacity? What can he bring to my life? And honestly, what I've actually realized this year is that the more financially generous a man is to me, the more attractive he becomes to me. And that's just where I'm at right now. You know, I've met men that initially like that are not like um, I've been on dates this year with men that are not like uh, I would say like net neck breakers. But when I tell you, when when you sitting down with them and they start talking about all the companies they built, I go there's a man I'm talking to right now. Now he owns a technology company. Um, and you know, he probably would like he's not an ugly guy, but he's not a neck breaker either. But I think I find him very, very attractive. I find him very, very sexy as well. Um, especially since he's also um mentoring my son now in his technology company. Whoop-whoop. So I'm really excited about that. But like, yeah, I'm very attracted to him. And but is it wasn't about how he looked as much as about like what this man created in the world, and he's already in a position to change my life because he is changing my son's life.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:So and I'm not saying I'm gonna get with anybody who I find disgusting. I would never. I see certain dudes on there, I don't care how much money you got, I would never look at your eyes. Sir, you look scary. Why did you put this? If you put if you chose this photo to put on a dating app, your ass is crazy. Your ass is crazy. But anywho, attraction isn't the first box I'm checking anymore. Now, a lot of you listening, it might not be about the money. And that's fine. I just need you to know that that is okay. But I want you to ask yourself the same kind of question. When you're on these apps, when you're meeting men in person, are you simply just taking action based upon how he looks? Because some of y'all be doing that. Some even clients, I'll be catching clients. I'm like, why the hell are you swiped on him, girl? And they'd be like, Oh, he looked good. Oh my gosh. Like, I want you to be very attracted to him, but at the same time, we're not, we are not choosing men because they look good. I will never let my client do that. Choose a man because he looks good. All right. Are you swiping right because of his face or what he's actually shown you about some of his core values and his character? It's a it's the same principle, it's just applied differently. The second thing that I'm letting go is feeling sorry for men. Now, I've already stopped feeling sorry for men in 2025, but then I noticed I was talking to this guy that owned like a construction company, and he was telling me, like, I well, back it up. I let go feeling sorry for men for like regular things, like regular, normal things, like, oh, well, I I'm not able to, you know, give you the dates that you want. Give it I don't care. I don't feel sorry for you because you're not able to do that. You need to go, you need to go figure out your life, okay? And also, I because it one of the reason why this is important is because when I share my dating stories and my life on social media, people be feeling sorry for these men. And I don't understand it. Well, I do understand it. They're male identified, but they're they feel sorry because I didn't choose any of these men to be exclusive with, like, oh, poor big buddy Benz. He wants to be with you and you don't want to marry him. Oh, poor Latin Poppy. He bought your son a car and he did this and he did that, and you don't want to be.
SPEAKER_00:Why y'all feeling sorry? But he's me. Because I don't want to be they woman.
SPEAKER_01:Anyway, I've been let that type of feeling sorry for mango. But like now that I'm dating men who can change my life in an instance, and that's my focus, like there's a different kind of feeling sorry because I'm dating for lifestyle and not love. Like, I am like I am asking for bigger things. I am looking for you to provide bigger things. And uh sometimes these men so going back to the man who owns a construction company, he built this construction company many moons ago, and super profitable company, and but he talks about like how he built it. He built it because of when he was 20 years old, he was dating a woman who had two kids, and he wanted to provide for them, and he couldn't, so he ended up building this company so he can actually provide for them, and he helped her raise the kids and she cheated on him. And then there was another woman, like he like he helped raise all all this all the good stuff. Then there was another woman who also, you know, had some kids, and then he was married to her, he was married to both women, and then I think she cheated on him too, or whatever, or like used him for his money, or something like that, like using him, and then there was this other girl that kind that used him for his money, and at first I was feeling sorry for him. I was like, oh, but then I had to catch myself. I'm like, sorry, this is a grown-ass man, he's older than you. He made these choices, he made them with them consciously. Do not let that change how you interact with him, do not let anything slide because he had those experiences. Because it was something in me like, oh Tara, don't ask for this from him. Because these girls used him for no, I don't care. He made those choices, and if he wants to date me, then this is how he needs to show up. And he can make a choice whether to date me or not. But I'm not gonna feel sorry. You know, I don't I'm I don't want to think in my brain, oh, I don't want to ask for too much because he done been through some stuff. He don't need to date me then. Or I don't want to seem demanding, you know, or shrinking my standards because I'm worried about how he's gonna feel about them. Right? So he offered to take me on a spa date. But the thing is, he wanted to attend, he wanted to come on the spa date. And I'm like, no, you can actually gift me the spa date this weekend, and I can go, like, I can actually just go and have my self-care done. Because I wanted to see if he was actually generous. Like when men want to pay for things and they gotta be involved, that's not really generosity. And so, yeah, I was at first I was like, no, you know, I don't want him to think I'm using him. No, no, no, no. I would like for you to gift me this spa day to help me do my self-care this weekend, even though you can't be there. Okay? So I'm done feeling sorry for them. Yeah, they're making choices that they consciously chose. So that era, that that's that's that's what I'm letting go this year, like feeling sorry for them. And I'm actually actively even like like building that skill set every single week of thinking, like, oh, am I feeling sorry for him, Torah? You're not don't feel sorry for him. And this applies to you too. You know, whether you're asking for communication from a man, if you're asking for a certain date from a man, a certain level of effort, whatever it is that you need from a man to date him, you gotta stop making yourself smaller so he doesn't feel bad. Or you gotta stop holding back so he doesn't think something of you. His comfort is not your responsibility to manage, especially a grown man. And most of y'all listening to this are dating grown ass men in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, some of us. And the third thing I'm doing is I am letting go dating just for fun. I'm not doing that this year. I love to have fun dating, but it's no longer just for fun for me. It's actually like um there needs to be significant, like before I go on the first date, I need to know that investment is happening. Okay? There's no date happening if there's no investment happening. And that's just just that's gonna ha that's how it's gonna be for me this year. I was talking to a guy I matched with last week, and he asked me like how my uh like his question was like, Happy New Year, like how was your Christmas? And I was like, Oh, you know, Santa was a little light this year on the gifts, but I'm still accepting late gifts. And so this man proceeds to say, he was like, Oh, this is the third message. He was just like, Oh, I'm wondering what kind of gift should I get you. Um, or he didn't say that. He said, Well, I'm wondering what kind of gift I should get a woman who's desired by men everywhere. That's what he said. And I told him the exact gift that he could get me. And it I named the gift. I named the name of the it was a perfume. It was like a$200 bottle of perfume. And he looked it up. He looked it up to get it from me. And this is in the dating app. And so that's what when he asked for my number to move me off the app, I gave it to him. I gave it to him because he is he was a man that was ready to be generous in that way on the app. So that's what I mean by no longer dating for fire. I would just get off the apps from men who were planning dates. Um, and now I'm not doing that. Like, and that that means I'm gonna go on less dates because a lot of men are gonna ignore me. A lot of men are gonna unmatch me. They have been, they have been ignoring me and unlike they have been like just and it's and it's the funny thing is like there was this one guy, he goes on and tell me that his love language is physical touch really important. And we were going back and forth in the apps, and the moment that I said that my love language was gifts, my love language was gifts, hugely important, he left me on read. But I'm like, oh, you get to say what you want to say, but now I'm saying what I want to say, and now it's a problem, you know. So I'm I'm letting that go of like dating just for fun, dating for free. Again, not prostitution, but knowing that this man, because if I want a man to be able to change my life, I have to know that he like a$200 bottle of perfume isn't an issue. Like, I gotta know that ahead of time before we start going out, if that makes sense. Okay. So I want you to ask yourself the same thing in terms of your dating strategy. Like for me, that investment is financial. But for you, maybe it's, you know, how he's investing in uh effort. You know, is he actually planning the date? Is he actually moving you toward uh towards a date? Is he actually asking you really good questions before the date? Uh are you or are you the one doing all the work to make that happen? You know, so your type of investment might look different depending on what you're going for, but requiring some kind of investment from men should be a non-negotiable for all of us, whether it's financial effort, time, it should be a non-negotiable. Okay. Fourth, I'm letting go waiting to ask for what I want. Okay. Even if it's a bigger thing. And I just mentioned one of those things that I asked for. You know, typically that's something that I would wait to ask for on the you know, maybe a few dates in. I would wait to ask for a$200 uh bottle of perfume, and now I'm asking for it in the dating app. Right? So I'm letting go waiting. I'm not gonna wait to find out if he is generous or he's willing to invest that way because I have different goals this year. I'm not also I'm not going to just hope he's that kind of man. I am going to be doing my research on who he is, you know, where he works, where he lives, the company he keeps, before we even jump off the app. So I might be on the app longer than 48 hours. And I'm okay with that because I have a different goal. And I'm also not going to tiptoe around my standards hoping he'll figure it out on his own. I've been unmatching like a crazy person this week. I've been unmatched and I've been doing more than unmatching, I've been blocking because I don't even want to see you back in my swipes. I don't even want to see you back on the dating app looking at me, right? Especially if you you have proven yourself to not be the kind of man that I want to talk to.
SPEAKER_00:You know?
SPEAKER_01:Um, so yeah, I'm I'm I'm letting go of that. All right. I'm communicating what I want up front early and clearly. And the same thing should go for you. Whatever your thing is, whatever you whatever you desire, you know, emotional availability, quality time, you know, dates. Stop waiting around to figure out if he can deliver what you need. You know, figure it out early and move accordingly based upon what you learn. Stop trying to figure out if he's gonna take you on a date and waiting. You need to go ahead and put it out there on your dating profile that that's what you're looking for. That you need to put it on your match note, you need to you need to bring it up in the first video call. Like, do not wait if you want dates. Do not wait. So, again, we may have different goals, but the same the process is the same. Okay, so along with any kind of goal, you need to be focused on the skill. So, even though I want certain goals, I have to build certain skills. So I have three skills that I'm working on this year, and some of some of them didn't I'm not learning them from scratch.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. What's different is the altitude that I'm taking these skills.
SPEAKER_01:I'm sharpening the same skills that I had when I was dating more for fun, more for love, and I'm just taking it into a different arena at a higher level, at a bigger play. But the thing is, the higher I go with these skills, the further I'm gonna be able to take you as your coach. And that's the whole point. So, one skill that I'm sharpening for 2026 is aesthetics. Is aesthetics in the but in the months of like November or December, I've already started curating a brand new wardrobe. If you haven't already noticed, if you watch me on stories, I've already been going to my closet every single week, getting rid of old things, bringing in new things, spending money on really nice uh dresses, having the men that I date buy me nice dresses. I've invested uh, you know, a good amount of money in upgrading um my wardrobe. I've actually, you know, made sure that a lot of my clothing is of higher quality. I I was easily a Sheen girl, you know, of just like, I'm just gonna order everything off Sheen. Like I've been moving away from that and just looking for more curated, more quality clothes. And I've been absolutely loving it. Okay, this because I'm not a fashion hester, I'm just not, but I'm learning fashion. I'm learning clothing. Um, and I've already like invested, uh I've also invested into my makeup, uh, like in my aesthetics. I have had multiple sessions on my makeup. I think I talked about that earlier in the podcast. You know, because at the level that I'm trying to play at, how I present myself really, really, really, really, really, really matters, especially to these men making millions, especially to these men owning several different companies. Um, especially these men that are like money is just an abundance, and aesthetics are gonna be really, really important here. Okay. Now, some of you might be like, oh, you know, I shouldn't have to change, you know, don't change for like if you want a certain kind of man, like you're always gonna have to care about the aesthetics. The same thing with men. If men want a certain kind of money, they they have to care about certain kind of aesthetics, depending on what kind of woman that he wants. And these men that I'm going for, um, the quality clothing matters and the makeup, you know. And so I um, although I I do have really, really nice skin, I have seen how makeup has really enhanced my look and gave gave it a like a really uh elegant grown-up look. I think I have like a baby face with a chickmunk cheek. So the makeup does give me a more mature and elegant look. And so I'm being very intentional about that. I like I said, I've set up several sessions, I'm learning the makeup, I've bought the products, I've been I've been testing it out. And so again, like for you, this might look different, but the question is the same. Are you showing up like the woman who already has what she wants? Or are you showing up hoping somebody will see your potential and invest in what you become? And there's a difference because I often will have to coach clients. I'm looking at their photos and I'm like, you said you want the 200k man? Like these photos barely qualify for the 80k man. So, so what are we doing here? Like this, you want a man who invests a lot of time in being the 1% of people who solve problems and improve themselves, and your photos look like the 99%. Doesn't work that way. Okay. The second skill that I'm learning this year is I'm working on my positioning. Okay. I have always been really, really good at positioning myself to meet quality men, high-quality men. But these kinds of men, the in the lifestyle change that I'm looking for, my goal is to be positioned consistently where high-earning millionaire men exist. So, my goal this year also is to attend at least five elite high society type events this year. Because I want to social climb. I really want to learn the art of social climbing. Living in Western society, um, it makes it so easy for you to social climb versus like other countries. It's really, really hard to change social classes. But here it's super easy. So why not do it? Why? Why won't I put in the work to do it if it's really what I want? So I want a social climb. I um my new mentor, and I'm gonna talk about her a little bit later. She provided me a calendar of all the high society elite events this year. It's so many events. Um, that I need to be in rooms where these kinds of men are gonna be. So she gave me the calendar. I need to pick the ones I need to go. And I tell my client, I tell y'all all the time, y'all, my clients, you have to be around the reality you want before you can attract it into your life. A lot of y'all want a certain kind of man and you never in his room. You never in his spaces, right? You never even smell the cologne that he wears on his neck. You're not gonna meet a certain caliber of man if you're never in the spaces where he exists. And so I'm trying to be in those spaces. I'm looking at how much these tickets cost, and I'm like, ooh, how can I? I'm gonna see if I can get a man to pay for these tickets. So, for example, I plan to go to the Kentucky Derby this year. The ticket that I want is$4,000. I don't plan on paying for that ticket, okay? But I plan to be there. I'm looking at certain car shows I want to be at. Um, I definitely want to be in some of like the VIP parties at some of these events. So, for example, if I choose to go where the Super Bowl is this year, which I probably won't be at the Super Bowl, but Super Bowl parties, like, and certain Super Bowl parties. So, yeah, I'm just I'm priming myself. My mentor is getting me set, set with all of that. So, again, the rooms I'm trying to get into might look different from the rooms that you need to be in, and that is fine. You know, like again, my strategy is different this year, but the question is the same. Are you actually positioning yourself in places where the kind of man you want spends his time, whether he's making 70K, 100K, 200K? Are you sitting at home somehow waiting for him to find you? Okay, without no strategy, without no online strategy. And then communication. I'm really sharp. A lot of you guys already think I communicate well. Oh, talking to these men and the goal that I have with these men, the communication is complete, it's so different. And I'm getting used to it. It is so different. I'm using ChatGPT and Claude AI to really hone my skills. I literally have a whole project in Claude and like creating the skills to talk to these men and reach my goal. But specifically around how I communicate my standards, how I um quote unquote test the man's generosity upon first meeting him and the dating process, and then doing it without feeling awkward or pushy or transactional, right? Because you because you want it to be playful and confident and completely natural. And there's a lot of places where this isn't natural to me to ask for some of the things that I'm asking for. I don't care. I'm gonna learn it. Um, and communication is something that I already teach, but this is another level for myself. This is a different kind of skill. And also, it's so I can teach it to you at a different level, depending on what your goals become. Because whether you are, you know, you have my particular goal or you have other goals with men. Um, like some of you guys aren't even used to asking for certain kinds of dates. Communication is gonna be important for you to learn. And so I'm getting sharper at it, so I can help you get sharper at it too. I'm gonna be able to communicate to men in so many different ways, so many different caliber of men. I am going to know how to talk to um so easily, you know, from the 70K man to the to the multimillionaire, you know. Let's see if we can slide us a billionaire in there this year. We'll see. Also, something I've learned about level up in any other area of your life is that you can try to figure all of this out by yourself and waste a whole lot of time in the process. Or you can find someone who's already where you want to be and you learn from them so you can get there faster. So I have hired a mentor for 2026. Now, some of y'all know that I had hired a dating coach a while back. I have a whole episode about it. I talked about her on the podcast, and it didn't work out because we it it we just didn't align. Number one, when I told you about her, we hadn't, we had had great success for one month in terms of like my business, but I hadn't we really hadn't gotten into the dating yet. And that it just wasn't, it wasn't a great fit at all when it came to the dating side of things. And so I decided to end that relationship and look for somebody else who was gonna be more in alignment with dating and not just you know help benefit my business. Um so I found this new mentor. Oh my gosh, I love her to pieces. We I we've been working on my dating stuff for the past two to three months now, and we talk almost every single day. And um she is also a former sugar baby, but she's elevated past that phase at this point. No should, no shade to anybody who sugars, but she's not in a position where she's like looking for sugar daddies anymore, but she is dating men for lifestyle purpose purposely. We just celebrated recently. One of the men that she's dating gifted her a brand new Mercedes. A brand new Mercedes. Somebody, again, never had sex with this guy. By the way, she's celibate, she's been celibate for years, okay, and she's been gifted so many amazing things by men. And so, again, this is the level. This is like the level. This is her third car that a man has gifted her. It's a brand new car. And so we were celebrating that, and I'm like, yes, I want to get to the point where I can receive a gift, uh, a car, uh a nice luxury car from a man, and not have to think about what I owe him if he's like I want to like him thinking that he's done such a great thing. Like the again, these men have lots of money, so it's not like you know, they're they're hurting when they provide it, if that makes sense. So, yeah, she was gifted in Mercedes and like that was inspiring to me. And I'm like, yeah, I want I want that. So that's the level of the game that I'm learning right now. That's the kind of mentorship that I'm investing in for myself. And I'm excited about this whole year because I think she's very, very brilliant. Now she challenges me because one of the things I mentioned in my my podcast when I said I was dating for uh when I hired the dating coach, is I really wanted to get rid of the good girl. This woman, oh, when I tell you she challenges my good girl in so many different ways, that residue that comes up. I'm like, oh, I'm just so happy I found you. Working with her has been absolutely life-changing in the back. Like, she's she found my makeup, she gave me my makeup artist. She has given me all the places where I'm getting my new clothes from. Like, I don't know. We'll I'll probably talk about her a little bit later at another date. But I love the fact that I found someone to give me quick shortcuts because I'll be damned if I spend a year trying to figure this out on my own. I know some of y'all want to do that. Some of y'all like doing that because it, you know, I guess coaching is above you. It ain't never above me, honey. It ain't never, especially when you see me popping out with all the things that I want in my life. It ain't never above me to get coaching. So I'm I'm excited about my mentor and to to to to keep you posted on what we're doing together. Now, success for me in 2026. So I have goals, like very specific goals as well. Um so the goals that I have myself where I can say, oh, this is what success looks like for me. It means receiving gifts or money and or money before or on every single first date. That's what that means. It means receiving everything on my wish list, my Amazon wish list, like from the men that I'm dating. It means having at least two high-earning, generous men consistently in my roster. It means attending the five or more high society events throughout the year. And it means five figures of predictable monthly income coming from men. So, like those are my specific metrics. And that's how I'm going to know whether my strategy is working or not, or am I making progress? Now I can get to the end of the year and say, oh, Torah, you didn't get the five figures of predictable monthly income. But that doesn't mean that my strategy didn't work if I got two figures or three figures. Uh, not two figures, I'm sorry. Four figures. If I got four figures of predictable monthly income, I'm not gonna say I didn't win. Or one of those dates I didn't get, you know, gift or money. Like, I'm not measuring it based upon that, but I'm saying like, Tori, you weren't doing you weren't doing this in 2025. Look at what you've done in 2026. So, yes, I have the success metrics, but I also have my progression metrics as well. And your metrics are gonna look different because your goals are different, and that's exactly how it should be. So maybe success looks like going on four quality dates uh in the next two months with men who actually planned everything out, or maybe it is adding a man to your roster who's emotionally present and available, or maybe it's getting engaged to a man that actually treats you the way you've always deserved to be treated. The point isn't that your goals need to look like mine, the point is you need to actually have the goals clear, specific, measurable, and that way you can tell if you're actually making progress towards what you want, or just staying busy without getting anywhere, like most people are doing. Okay now, I've shared all this with you, and the reality is I can only take you as far as I've gone myself. If I stop growing, if I stop experimenting, if I if I stop exploring different things, then your growth has a ceiling too, you know? And that's okay. You know, it's okay if like if if that's the case, but it doesn't have to be the case here. If I get comfortable where I am, then I can only te I can only coach you to be comfortable in that spot. So me going harder this year, me playing at a higher level, me sharpening these skills that I've already teaching you, that's not just for my benefit, that's for your benefit as well. And when I get sharper at stating my standards without flinching, and I can teach you how to do it better. When I get better at positioning myself in the right rooms, I can show you how to find the right rooms a lot better. And when I go deeper on not apologizing for what I want, I can help you stop at a higher altitude, whatever that is. These skills translate across the board. And the principles apply no matter what you're dating for. And I'm just practicing them at a different level so that I can take you higher when you're ready. So watch closely how I move this year. Follow me on Instagram, listen to these podcast episodes, hire me as your coach. Okay? Take whatever applies to your situation and know that everything I'm learning out here, I'm bringing back to you. So 2026 for me is all about intention. More intention than I've ever bought to my dating life before. I have a strategy, I know what I want, I know exactly how I'm building towards it. And my question for you is this What's your dating strategy this year?
SPEAKER_00:What are you actually going after? What does success look like for you specifically? Are you being intentional about getting there?
SPEAKER_01:Or are you just kind of hoping it all works out somehow? Because hope is not a plan. And you deserve so much more than just we'll see what happens. Maybe one day. So get clear about what you want and get really strategic about how you're gonna get it. And if you need help with that, if you need help on reaching your romantic goals this year, on letting go of the things that's stopping you from getting there, on being able to learn the skills that you need to get there, definitely consider booking a sales call with me. Book a sales call with me to work with me one-to-one to craft your personal 2026 strategy so that you know what skills that you are building this year, and I can help you do every moment of it through your positioning, through your connection with men, through your ability to connect with your ideal kinds of men, so that you can build a roster of two to three men that serve and support you and are serious about pursuing you. If you're interested in that, the link will be in the show notes or it's on my Instagram. You can go to my Instagram and click on the link. And uh yeah, I look forward to talking to you on the sales call where we get very clear about what you want to have happen this year and a plan of how I can help you get there. So if you want to hear that, you can jump on the sales call. But anywho, I gotta go until next time. Bye.