Greater Things

When God Says "Pick Up Your Brush": The Journey of Artist Jessie DeCorsey

Matt Beckenham Season 6 Episode 8

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Have you ever felt God calling you toward something that initially made you want to say "no thank you"? That's exactly what happened when artist Jessie DeCorsey felt the divine nudge to pick up her paintbrush again after years of creative trauma and disappointment.

Despite being a lifelong artist with two decades of professional experience, Jessie had reached a point where painting was associated with so much hurt that she couldn't imagine returning to it. A professor's dismissive comment about her faith-inspired art having "no future," followed by years of struggle trying to market her work, had left deep wounds. Even when opportunities finally emerged—like becoming an artist-in-residence at Luther Seminary—a faith crisis left her creatively empty, unable to find inspiration or even desire to create.

In this deeply personal conversation, Jessie reveals how God's simple invitation to "pick up your brush" transformed into a journey of profound healing and creative liberation. Without agenda or pressure to succeed, she found herself creating over 20 paintings in just three months, each one becoming a devotional conversation with God. The freedom she discovered came through releasing expectations about outcomes and simply asking each day: "What do you want to create with me today?"

This episode explores how creativity flows naturally when we release the need for validation and commercial success, how comparison kills our unique expression, and how to identify what truly brings life to your spirit. Whether you're an artist, writer, musician, or someone who's never considered yourself "creative," Jessie's story offers a powerful invitation to reconsider what creativity might look like in your own life and to take that first small step toward what God is calling you to do—even when it feels uncomfortable.

What creative expression might be waiting for you on the other side of hesitation? Listen in and be inspired to discover your own divine conversation through creativity.

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Speaker 1:

Today on the Greater Things Podcast, I'm back with Jessie DeCoursey. She's the amazing illustrator of three of my four books and she is a brilliant artist in her own right. Today, I'm talking with her about a moment when God stepped into her world and encouraged her to pick up her paintbrush again, and we look at all the things that have happened since that moment. Well, today on the Greater Things Podcast, I am back with our very good friend, jessie Ducorsi. How you doing, jess?

Speaker 2:

I'm doing really good. Thanks for having me.

Speaker 1:

It's been a little bit since we've had you on the podcast. You and I have been doing a thing called Mystic and the Nerd and that seems to have taken a lot of our attention and things that we're doing inside of the Greater Things community with unpacking things of mysticism and nerd world. Would that be a fair statement in how we describe it?

Speaker 2:

I would say the Bible oh the Bible Okay. But yeah, through our own unique lens.

Speaker 1:

Good, good, good Today. One of the things that I want to chat with you today about, jess, is the extraordinary paintings that you are producing so regularly at the moment, and I know a little bit about the backstory of sitting with God at the end of last year and him just going okay, it's time to pick up the paintbrush. People who haven't seen Jesse's painting? If you're listening along, you've got to have a look at jessiedecorsicom or buy any one of my books other than Eden's Blueprint, like the Three Trees, three Floods. Is that a good segue and plug? Did I do that well?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I'm proud of that work.

Speaker 1:

Definitely. Well, a few years ago, when I was talking to Jess about what I was wanting to do and I said, would you be interested in illustrating? She jumped on it and said, yeah, I'd love to do that, and it's formed a partnership that I've just really enjoyed. Not only the partnership of doing it, but the work that has come from it has really brought to life so much of the things that I've been writing, and so many people comment to me on the artistry that's happening there, and even had an email last week, jess, to say could they be bigger in the new book? Could they be in colour?

Speaker 1:

We want to see more of what Jessie's doing, and all those questions are good and wonderful. Mind you, most of the drawings are in black and white, so that's the way that they come, but the covers are in colour. But this painting of yours being an artist for so many years has been a dream for all your married life at least, if not even before then. But God seems to be turning up the volume or there's something that's on it and so like. If you're watching this on YouTube, there's a painting behind Jessie that she's just done with the lion and the lamb, which is stunning that she's just done with the lion and the lamb, which is stunning, and we probably need to get that out there even so that people are podcasting and getting links to see that particular work. But just talk to us about God saying pick up the paintbrush. How did that happen and what's been the process from there?

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So last year towards the end of the year, you know how God just kind of sometimes throws something out there that hits you and you go. Really God. It might sound surprising, I suppose, to many people that know me, because I've been an artist my entire life and professional artist for the last 20 years. I started a small business even, I think, right out of high school or still in high school, doing murals for people.

Speaker 2:

I loved to paint big, studied art at college and got a degree in it and just planned on pursuing it my whole life, which I did as good as I could in between having children and starting a photography business. Art was always very much a big part of my heart and really how it coincided with my faith became the biggest way of me learning more about God and myself and others. But it was a really hard journey and hard path. The doors just didn't open throughout my life with that. It was hard to sell painting. I could do commissions, but as far as my own body of work and creating things that really were coming from Jesse, like what's inside of me, it was really hard to market. And I remember in college doing a student exhibition where I painted all of these saints and their lives, and a professor saying this is great but it has no future, and just really struggling with that idea and kind of having that be spoken over my work really tanked me. It was like, well, there's really no trajectory going forward with this Christian art, the way that I am showing it and expressing it. So where does that pass lead? Where does that pass lead? And then God opened the door for me to in let's see, 2019-ish, to go be an artist-in-residence at Luther Seminary to really combine my faith and art for the first time. I thought, all right, this is it, Lord, this. You know it's been a long journey, but we made it and this is your plan. This is finally going to work where I can really express my ideas and my thoughts and my faith through my art.

Speaker 2:

But then COVID happened and seminary was incredibly challenging in some areas. I ended up having kind of a faith crisis towards the end of it and coming out of that, there was no creativity left in the tank. There's no desire. I think I came out of that more broken than ever before and I couldn't even find inspiration. I couldn't even think about what it would look like to paint again, or what story I even wanted to paint anymore. So to go through that whole journey and to finally be in a place where I feel like I'm pursuing or in my calling, or things feel like they're kind of coming together in my life. And then all of a sudden and I would say more in ministry or teaching and things that I'm also really passionate about and then suddenly he says it's time to pick up your brush.

Speaker 2:

At the end of last year and it was just kind of that reaction going when you pick up your brush for it to be a good experience you want to pick up that brush and be like, yes, I'm ready to paint, I have so much inspiration, I know what I want to do. But there was almost so much trauma related to that paintbrush, so much disappointment, so much struggle and striving, and I just thought I just I don't want to do this anymore, I don't think I want to pick up my brush. What's the point? What are we doing? Why? You know, I'm very happy with where we're at right now. Lord, maybe we'll just keep doing this, and so it was really a step of faith for me to say okay, Lord, what are we doing? What are we painting Without really a plan or a vision of what that was going to look like.

Speaker 1:

Wow, even the idea and the aspect of the trauma that that paintbrush held. You must have taken a deep breath around Christmastime because from Christmas you must have painted a dozen very large paintings not more right.

Speaker 2:

And I had been painting, I would say when I released my book I started in a small series. That was kind of my first very light, kind of going back and painting a few lines and really having fun with that again. So that was definitely a joyful experience. But this felt different. This felt like it's time to really focus on this again and tell some story here and I just, yeah, I had to take a deep breath. But the I guess the most helpful part of that was he gave me my first painting. I just really felt like I could perceive or see a picture of his face and I thought, wow, that is an incredibly beautiful image of you, lord, to imagine what your face is.

Speaker 2:

Often in my prayer time I don't have a very clear, perfect image of a face, of what I perceive Jesus looking like. You know it's that. Yeah, I can sense, you know, god's closeness, nearness, love, comfort, peace, joy, all those things. But this was a very visual image of his face and I thought that's so beautiful but I can never paint that. And that still small voice was like sure, you can give it a try. What's worse that could happen? You know, throw it out. So I dusted off the oil paints which I had shelved. I had not returned oil paints, which is my favorite medium. I'd been working in a different kind of paint that allows me to do things really quickly and playfully, and this was, yeah, really kind of dusting off all my old skills. I even took a class in January to kind of brush up on my oil painting skills and kind of branch out a little more into landscape and things I hadn't done for many, many years and just started diving in. And now I think, yes, since starting this year, I've probably painted over 20 paintings.

Speaker 1:

Tell us about what that brings to you. Like one, I'm guessing there's an inspiration to what to paint, then there's the process of painting, and then there's the standing back and going. Is this something I'm proud of? Tell us about that process.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely proud of. Like tell us about that process. Yeah, absolutely. Sometimes it's a. Oftentimes that'll be just a thought that comes to mind going yeah, I have this thought about a scripture or the way Jesus spoke about this thing. I wonder what that would look like as a, as an image. And then an image will come to mind and I'll go okay, I wonder how I would bring that to life. And then it's a process of collecting images and gathering as much as I need to try to get that sketched out and painted.

Speaker 2:

And my first kind of attack at the canvas is my favorite because it's just seeing if it's a possibility, it's getting it out of your mind and onto reality. It becomes a thing. And then the rest of the process is a little more strenuous. It's kind of the detail and the build-up and kind of perfecting it to where I really feel like maybe I've mastered that image, or to a point where I'm happy with it. It really kind of came across the way I wanted it to. Not all of them do. There's definitely sometimes I stand back and go, oh, that I don't think that turned out exactly how I wanted it to. I'll try another one. That's often why you see a lot of different poses of the same thing I've just done. Uh, yeah, I'll do several in a series, often because the first one I go I think I could do that better. I want I wonder what that would look like from this angle. And each time I do that they end up telling a different story in itself. So that last process is kind of standing back and going no, what does this really say? And I love praying about him, I love listening to the Lord and seeing what his heart is for this piece and I think a lot of the time it comes to me I don't really even know why or what it says until it's finished, and then I'll go to the Word, I'll sit with the Lord and I'll say it was the Lord and I'll be like, wow, that's really what it was meant to say.

Speaker 2:

And some of them are through accidents. Like I painted, I just knew I really wanted to try a sheep and I was really drawn to the texture and the wool. So I picked kind of an older sheep. But when I finished it I went all right, what's this called? And then just so loudly said it's worthy as the lamb and I thought, yes, that's exactly what this painting is.

Speaker 2:

And then, as I tried to kind of wrap the words around it later on this was probably weeks later I wanted to sit down and see really what the meaning was that I would write along with it. And it turned out to be funny because I realized it wasn't a lamb that I was looking at, it was a sheep. So I thought, well, lord, why did I feel so pulled towards this title of worthy as a lamb when I'm looking at a sheep? And what does that look like? So then it was this whole process of understanding more biblical concepts around images of sheep and lamb and what it means. And now I look and lamb and what it means. And now I look at that painting. It means something completely different to me than what it started as, just my draw towards texture and wool. So yeah, that's part of the journey, part of the fun and adventure.

Speaker 1:

It's very holistic the things that you're saying, because it's not just I'm going to paint a painting and hope people like it. It's come from a place where God's like, pick up your brush and you've gone yeah, god, I'm just not sure that's the best idea in the world to 20 paintings later or more, and you sit down and you're then looking for revelation, or so, god, why? That's what I'm hearing, right.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, In so many different ways, Like this morning. Yesterday I was praying and I just had this image of hands kind of coming together and I thought that is beautiful. So before the end of the day I already had it sketched on and I went. I just really feel like it just bubbles up in me and I can't wait to see what these two hands will look like. And I felt like the Lord just said create it in my image. And like, yes, now as I'm painting that I'm going what's being created in your image and I'm thinking of all the ways that I'm created in his image and it becomes kind of this devotional and something I get to share, I hope, with others, to see if I can draw them into that conversation as well.

Speaker 1:

At the heart of this to me is the essence of creativity, and I know you and I have spoken about this en masse as to how does God speak through creativity and the Bible being very clear on the concept that he not only does it, it's like his key form of sharing the things that he's doing, saying all of those things, of sharing the things that he's doing, saying all of those things. The idea inside of this for me is that when I'm writing, I'm learning and I'm discovering new revelations of God all the time. Has this been something you've always had when you've been painting, or is this something that's in your revelation, like what's the story there?

Speaker 2:

Definitely. Yeah, that's such a good question because I've been thinking of that a lot With my older work. I was trying to look at the way other people painted the stories of Christ and understand who God was through artwork by looking at it. And I would put people I knew in it myself or my family in it and I would try to say, okay, this is a story in the Bible. Theologically. What does this mean to me? If I can see them in it, I can see myself in it. How does this story relate to me?

Speaker 2:

And now I love returning to the paintbrush and picking it up because I'm not entering in as an outsider. I guess looking at artwork in the same way Now it's coming through me, through my really personal time, with knowing who God is to me and then seeing what we create together. So it's quite a difference in the way. I think that I'm very thankful, I guess, for the journey. I couldn't be painting like I am now. These paintings wouldn't have been created years ago had I continued to pursue art the way that I was. It was nice to kind of lay it down for a while and go on this journey with him and really learn his heart and a new way to see his art, and then I get to paint it. Did that answer your question?

Speaker 1:

Absolutely, and this is the uniqueness of all of us engaging with the creativity that God has placed within us as well. One of the things that's going through my mind just to ask the question Jess, has it healed or is it healing the trauma?

Speaker 2:

Yes, it's been so redemptive. And you know what's funny, matt, when we first met, it was our very first meeting and I kind of shared a little of my story, kind of shared how I came to find you and Trish online, and kind of just right after COVID I think it was 2021. And one of the first things I said to you was I'm an artist but I don't know that I'll ever paint again. And you said very quickly oh, I'm sure you will. And I remember being like, well, you don't even know me and I don't know that I ever will.

Speaker 2:

And even, like you said, collaboration, the way that we've been able to collaborate on these other projects. It's like God has just been so gracious in the way that he's restored so many things, opened up different doors. I had never imagined been able to enter in with such curiosity and freedom and no striving, just trusting, just being able to delight in Him and not have any motive or agenda with what this is going to do. I don't have anything to prove, it's just really been joyful and there's been so much restoration in it for me.

Speaker 1:

It's like listening to you speak, like, even in your voice, like I do know you well, but there's such freedom in just the way that you're talking, the way that you're sharing, like you can hear it in the essence of the words that are there.

Speaker 2:

You're feeling it yeah, I think I mean, as any creative person and you I'm sure you can relate with writing there's that pressure, always that a performance or you have to paint the right thing or you have to. You have to do it in a way that you can generate income or have success. You're measuring. You're measuring success by your ability to sell it or to make a living from it, and it's hard as a creative person to do that just like a musician or anything else. And for so long, I think, when that's your focus, it takes away that freedom to just simply create and see where it leads and let it be what it is. And that's definitely been the gift in this season of being able to return to that and not worry about that as much.

Speaker 2:

I'm not. I don't have any plan or agenda. If no one sees these, that's fine. If it's just for me and I'm exhibiting them in my home or giving them away, or I who knows at the end of the day what it'll look like, or they just get stored in my closet for years and years to come. But even in saying that, that's not what God had in store for me, because just in completing my first 12 paintings within saying, lord, I feel like maybe these would be great to put out there and show. I really felt the Lord say, yep, but you don't even have to do any of that. He just took all the burden even of knowing what the next step was for where these would go. And I got an email from a church saying hey, do you have any paintings that you would be able to exhibit? We would love to feature you in our church. And wow, lord, you really did.

Speaker 2:

You meant what you said. I didn't have to worry about that. So that creates more faith, right? That creates more trust in God and His timing, and, of course, there's so much freedom in that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

It is an interesting thought to release yourself from expectation, because in a world where, if this is your thing, that you do, you're, you are looking for an income that comes from.

Speaker 1:

And I feel the same way with what I'm writing and sometimes it can be a real wrestle as to can I stay in the place where it can just be a thing, and I've found over recent months, if not the last 12 months, is just to write and then who knows where it goes, who knows what happens, and I've got so many files of just things that I've written that they never see anybody else other than me inside of that.

Speaker 1:

But it's getting myself into that place of presence just to exist in the conversation with god, the way that I write the, the way that he talks to me and listening to what you're saying, like even the healing of trauma, what a big deal that is like. Like that's that's the miracle thing that we're talking about here today as well. Like to go from December and the recording of this is in April. That's literally four months, or maybe just three and a half months, of you picking up a paintbrush and sitting talking about the freedom that you carry, the healing that is there, but also the voice of God that you've been able to engage with. That's beautiful, jess.

Speaker 2:

Thanks, yeah, I think it just came down to do I trust him. And that was that struggle, that tension with that paintbrush Do I still trust him? And when you step into that place of trust and as scary as it can be of trust in, as scary as it can be, when you do that, the healing that flowed and was released over me carried me through it you know that's all glory, that's all God, and then that's just continual joy, I guess in that place that continues to propel you and that's that sweet spot when you get in. It's not always like that. In the seasons past it hasn't been like that, but I'm really enjoying stepping into this place of discovery and seeing what he has in store with each of these pieces and yeah, the process that it's been.

Speaker 1:

So three and a half months down the road from God saying pick up your paintbrush. What do you see in the next three and a half months?

Speaker 2:

I think that's the best part, isn't it? I have the freedom to not worry about it and I can't say that that's been a part of the process before. I have no pressure, I have no deadline with it. It's just not even a thought of what's next or what's coming. I just say anticipation of this feels good, lord, and what do you want to create with me today?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what do you want to create with me today? What a great phrase that is. So what do you say to people, jess, who are listening along and going that's cool, jess is creative, matt's creative. I'm not Like. What do you say to a person who has that sort of internal dialogue going on inside of their mind?

Speaker 2:

I think everybody's creative in their own way and I think it's so helpful to just to learn what fills your cup. I think it's more of that. You know I speak a lot about joy, but what sparks a light inside of you? What is it? Maybe it's not painting or writing or photography or something along those lines that we think of creativity. But what if it's relationship? What if it's cooking? What if it's just reframing something in your life that brings you joy and sparks something in you? Maybe it's going for more walks or being in nature. Maybe that's where you feel creative is being outside in nature, just identifying what fills you and just moving towards it.

Speaker 2:

I know it's hard. It's really hard to find time and make room for it. A lot of us can't even answer that question, or we can, but, like me, there's maybe that hurt or maybe there's trauma from that thing that you tried to pursue and maybe it's just stolen the joy from it for you. Uh, so we just invite jesus into that. I think jesus knows exactly where that light is inside of us that he wants to spark and light up and um, and the healing will come when we continue to to move towards it yeah, it's a great answer inside of that place for me too, like that internal dialogue I can't.

Speaker 1:

For someone who's over 50 years old, I've been saying that for most of your life it's a really difficult concept to even engage with, and so you've been so used to saying I can't or I'm not that the opportunity or the hope that you could be, and then people go. But I'm not as good as Jessie. What do you say to people who say that they're not as good as you or they could never paint like you?

Speaker 2:

Well, if it makes you feel better. I think that way about myself all the time and I compare myself to other artists and I go why am I even trying? There's so many amazing artists and I think things like social media are incredible for sharing our gifts. But it also makes it more intimidating because then you see more and more people that are doing the thing that you do and you think, oh, why would I even try? But it's not about comparison. It's really there's something within you that you carry that matters, that God has put in you. That is you. It's part of who's something within you that you carry that matters, that God has put in you. That is you. It's part of who you are. So it's that becoming so, being able to tap into that, is really honoring God in you and your design and what he's created you in and for. So I think it's the best thing to just try to step on that snake, maybe, as you would say, matt, and not focus.

Speaker 2:

I remember the Lord even cautioning me when I was taking a class recently, going yeah, I know you really enjoy painting or the painting of this artist, and I was definitely having those thoughts, watching all these amazing artists in this class thinking, man, maybe I missed my time, maybe I missed my prime painting age, maybe I should stop now before I even try again. And he just really, the Lord just really encouraged me to be me. And that just gave me full permission to say that's right, because every single person has what I call like their own thumbprint. You could take a million artists, give them the exact same image to paint and every single person will have a unique image or a take on that, and I don't look at them as one that's better than than the other, I just go. That is the essence of the artist that created that thing and it's beautiful. It's wonderful because nobody else could could done it like that.

Speaker 1:

Very true. The idea of comparison is something that steals life, and you're talking about their own lives and what brings life into your spirit. And the whole idea of being creative for me is such a unique expression that as soon as we say things like, well, I can't paint like Jess, or I can't write like Matt, or I can't write like Tolkien or paint like Da Vinci, like it's just, you put yourself into the place where you're actually stealing life from you immediately and for many people. I wonder how often the dream of creativity stops before it even picks up a paintbrush or picks up a pen or picks up an instrument. It's long before that happens. You've already talked yourself out of a place of I'm creative and in that expression it's getting comfortable then with the life that comes to you because of what you're doing. So creativity for me brings new thought, new idea, new understanding, and I have discovered that, whether it was back when I was in the engineering world and drafting and doing all that sort of stuff and helping buildings stand up, I had to imagine, to think, to be creative, to understand.

Speaker 1:

I didn't call it creativity back then. That was just my job. I found it when I was leading a church, you're always trying to think creatively around the idea of what does this community or this expression of the church actually look like or could it look like, and that creativity then is deep down inside it. But I probably didn't even call it that back then. It's only been those last few years where I feel like this whole idea of creativity is such an intricate and essential part of our existence if I can even put it into that that it often becomes that the second brother half removed through divorce and whatever conversation, even inside of our own hearts, let alone the expressions of community that we have. But more and more these days I am seeing that it is an essential part of our design.

Speaker 2:

Well said.

Speaker 1:

So one of the things I do know about you two is you're passing this creativity on and you're giving your kids permission to go nuts right. Well, within reason, safety boundaries.

Speaker 2:

No paint on the walls.

Speaker 1:

Yes, you would have put paint on the walls, though I'm sure you would have done at a times no, no, no, neat freak yeah, that's true. That's, I can testify to that. So, giving your kids permission to be creative Tell us about that.

Speaker 2:

I think it's been kind of effortless for me. I grew up my mom was an artist and some of my most fundamental memories of a kiddo is watching her create and always making time for that in our lives. Everything we did, we made it. You know she was such a do-it-yourselfer before do-it-yourself was a thing, so that's just inherently what I've passed on to my kids. I just so love fostering any kind of creativity in their lives and what they want to do and giving them space to do it and encourage it. But they think I'm on the like too far of the encouraging, because everything they create, I think, is truly so amazing and it's kind of you know, and they don't, they don't buy it anymore. You know, mom, you always say that that's, it's not really that good they're. In that comparison thing, they they're trying to figure out if they're any good. I truly just think they're amazing every little step, watching them develop in whatever areas that they've been in.

Speaker 1:

But I've loved it as a rhythm in our family to always kind of bring it back to the table and making things together it's the truth that Trish and I have been able to have the privilege of witnessing that, whether it is from painting or carving pumpkins, how creative was that.

Speaker 2:

I was gonna say you guys carved your first pumpkins. At least you did. I'm sure Trish probably had carved a pumpkin, but we won't tell them how you got a pumpkin thrown in your eye and it didn't stop your creativity for a while.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I couldn't see out of one eye for a little bit, but it's all good. Now, right, it's all good. You just got to wear safety goggles when you're safety glasses when you're carving pumpkins. That's all I've got to say about that. I am a novice and I learn things the hard way, but it was a bunch of fun and we did some very nice work. I think you did help me with mine, but very, very impressed with the way way it all came out.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

Just thank you. Thank you for sharing your story, and my hope and my prayer for conversations like this is it encourages others to go. Could I? The answer is yes, you can. You're giving yourself permission to do that, but don't control yourself to think that it has to be painting lions and lambs or has to be writing books. Let yourself go on that beautiful, divine conversation of what does bring me life and in the idea of what brings you life, the concept is that you'll have more life, and so when you find those things that bring you life, do those, allow those to be an expression, and you'll be surprised how easily it is to connect with the God who created you, how easy it is to even hear what he's got to say to you. It's been a part of His design, his entire life. Is there anything else you want to drop on us just before we disappear?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I guess, just as you were saying that, just thinking, leaning into, yeah, what brings you life, but also like, what is he calling you to, that might sound like something you want to say no, thank you. Is there something like me? Pick up the brush? My initial response was I don't want to, but I'm so grateful. I'm so grateful that I did because of what he's continued to do through that whole process. So I just pray that anyone listening that may be in that position where God's put something on your heart and you're just feeling insecure about it, unsure, just praying that maybe this would encourage you to just see what it would look like for you. Maybe it's just taking one little baby step towards that and I just pray that he'd give you the confidence and bring things around you to let you continue to to explore that with him awesome.

Speaker 1:

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