Worrying You Will Gain the Weight Back

Do you find yourself worrying that you will gain the weight back.  So what is the point in investing in time, energy, and money into yourself?

I get it.  This thought makes sense, so let's talk about it.....

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I have 2 bits of Exciting News! I have a NEW podcast called Modern Body Modern Life....here is the link to Listen...

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/welcome-to-the-first-episode/id1720478442?i=1000637985103

And Enrollment is NOW OPEN for my March Group Program, click HERE to find all the details,

Courtney

Transcript

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Welcome to the Courtney Gray podcast the show for women who are ready to lose weight permanently, and love their body love the way they feel. And look, I'm going to teach you how to stop overeating and obsessing about food and your weight. So you can be more confident and empowered to then create an even bigger life. I'm life and body coach Courtney Gray. And each week, I'm going to be teaching you how losing and maintaining your ideal weight can be so much easier than it's been in the past, in my taking care of you and achieving your health goals. You will live in even more amazing life than the one you have lived so far. Let's get started. Welcome to the podcast 81 worrying, you will gain the weight back. So welcome. I spent a wonderful six days in Nashville, Tennessee, I've never been to Nashville before and I was there on business I coach in another coach's program. And there were about 100 I think about 110 people there. Mostly women, I love the ladies and I just had such a great time, there's about a cohort of us 10 coaches that coach for the program, I got to spend a lot of time with them. And then I got to do a combination of a little bit of coaching and a lot of learning. So it was absolutely amazing. And I think you'll remember my word of the year is adventurous. So when I found out that I was going to Nashville, and I've never been to Nashville, I was so excited. But I'm happy to be back I really missed, I miss my family. So I'm happy to be back. And I'm happy to be here recording this podcast for you. And I want to address one of the most common concerns I hear from women about trying to lose weight. And really from women trying to lose weight again, because so many of you I know have been like girl, I have been trying, I have tried, or I have tried and failed and tried and failed. That was me. I didn't like give a long term try. It was like three days, and then five days and then two days, and it was just exhausting. So one of the most common concerns I hear from women is, I've never been able to keep the weight off, I worry, I'm not going to be able to do it. They literally just say I don't know if I can do this. And this is a legitimate worry, I understand it. Maybe that surprises you, maybe you are gonna be like, Don't worry, you've got this No, I want to say I get it, this is a legitimate worry, I understand it, I think it's very normal to worry about this, or to assume you can't lose weight permanently. And I'm going to I'm going to speak to why I think that is legitimate, you have a lot of evidence to support it, you can think about all the times in the past you lost weight, and then you gained the weight back. So maybe you lost a large amount of weight and then you gained it back or maybe you just lost a little and gained back a little and everyone has their own story. But you have a lot of evidence to support. I don't think this is going to work for you. And I know that you've tried really hard and you've wanted it bad it is not for from a lack of trying. It's not from a lack of wanting it. But I want to shed some light and give you like a breakdown of what most people have tried to do and why it hasn't worked. I want you to feel seen, I want you to feel validated. And then I'm going to get you excited about trying something new. For most of us. There is a belief that in order to be thin or thinner or lose weight, we have to give up the fun. We have to give up the joy the party really enjoying and living life. For example, a lot of my clients, a lot of my clients love to eat out at restaurants. And that's one of the things they talk to me on a console I love to eat out. That's how we celebrate, we love to do it. And when they start working with me, they think they can't go out and eat and have fun. If they want to lose weight. They literally like sometimes they'll say I can't you know who you are. And then they worry about maintaining their weight. Because fun at a restaurant means they get to eat all the things. And so in the beginning when I suggest that they can eat well at a restaurant eat better than they've been eating at a restaurant, eat in a way that they can start to lose weight and still have fun and still enjoy life more enjoy the restaurant even more. They 100% don't agree, which again, make sense because they've never done it. So I just talked a few weeks ago about there was a podcast Oh, it was my either or podcast. It was I think from two weeks ago and what I talked about is the belief that either I can lose weight and be the weight I want to or I can have fun and enjoy my life. It's like the either or a lot of women believe it's either or, and I 100% agree with why most people believe this. So think back to the last Last time you lost weight, even if it was five or 10 pounds, and see if any of this sounds familiar. You probably I'm assuming it's some of this is going to be familiar to you probably you probably drastically changed your diet, you did something to the effect of cutting out flour or cutting out sugar cutting out alcohol, or increasing your workouts cutting out cheese I'm I'm I'm trying to remember all the things that I've done or people have done a cutting out bread, right? You went all in, but you went all out on your real life, you went all out on the way you live, day to day. So what did you learn from that experience? What you learned was, in order to lose weight, you have to deprive yourself, and live in a completely different way of life, in terms of how you eat and possibly even in terms of how you work out, because a lot of times I know, what's that 175 hard, which I'm never gonna say anything bad about any of these programs. But 75 heart is one of those things where you work out twice a day, well, not too many people for the rest of their life work out twice a day. So you're learning in that in those 75 days to get results based on working twice a day. Okay, so we're learning how to live a completely different life in order to get a certain result. You didn't learn how to balance, you didn't learn how to have some of your favorite foods in moderation. You didn't learn how to eat a little bit differently a little bit better. You didn't learn how to trust yourself to make a good decision. You didn't learn how to trust your body and to like dive in and say, am I hungry? Am I you know, how hungry? Am I? What's going on in my body? How is this going to feel in my body? You didn't learn how to trust your body. You didn't learn how to be curious if some of what you were doing was working and maybe pivot, right? Okay, this obviously isn't working, how can I love myself and be curious and pivot, you didn't learn how to enjoy yourself and eat in a way that sustainable at the same time you ate in a way that was pretty unrealistic to maintain. And then when you stopped the diet or the eating plan, you went back to the way you ate us. A lot of times we do it slowly, right? We tell ourselves we're going to you know not do this. But then we slowly start to go back to the way we ate and lived before. And then you gained the weight back? Of course, right? It really does make sense when we lay it out like this, it does make sense. I remember the first time I kind of said what is really going on, and I wrote this down. And then I was like, Well, of course I gained the weight back. It doesn't make sense that I would keep the weight off. So when women say to me, I'm worried I will gain the weight back. Yes, I can see why you would be worried. You don't want to do what you have done because you know it doesn't work. But let's be clear. You've showed up for your life in two different ways in the past, and these ways are not working. So the diets don't work because the results are temporary. I just kind of went through what a diet looks like. And those results are temporary doesn't work, right. That's one way you've showed up in your life. I'm taking a moment to tell you that I work privately one on one with women to help them lose weight permanently in create a body they love. This is not a diet program. This is a customized program to teach you how to eat the way you want to eat forever. No more restriction, no more willpower, no more losing weight only to sabotage and then gain it back again. The problem is not you, we women are so hard on ourselves. And we think if we could just get motivated or more determined if we could find the right diet plan or cut out certain foods, we will lose weight and be happy. But the answer is changing your brain and how you think and feel. Changing your self image and how you talk to yourself. Learning how to trust yourself. This is how you lose weight permanently. It sounds too good to be true. But I promise you it's not. The work I do with my clients is powerful, exciting and loving. And it's hard work to but the result is change forever. The women I work with are smart and successful in so many areas of their life, they just haven't been able to figure out their body. This is where I've come in, head to my website to schedule a consultation and we can talk about all the details back to the podcast. And the other way you've showed up as possibly kind of in a sense of giving up. It's when you kind of tell yourself, I'm just going to love myself and not worry about my body and weight. And I'm just going to not worry about this. I'm just going to live my life. And this doesn't work. Because it keeps coming back to you the desire to want to feel and look and be in a different body keeps coming back to you. You keep thinking about wanting to fit in your clothes better you keep thinking about wanting to be healthier. You keep worrying about becoming In pre diabetic you keep worrying about the next time you go to the doctor and what the test results are going to be, you keep thinking about all of this, you have a true desire for more. And so that way of living doesn't work either this whole idea of, I'm just going to I'm not going to worry about it just doesn't work either. Have you ever said to yourself, I'm just going to accept and love my body, and I'm not going to worry about this anymore. I used to say this to myself, right? When the waiter brought the menus around, I go to a restaurant, I'm like, I'm gonna eat healthy, we're doing good here, I'm gonna lose a little bit weight, I will be so much happier when I lose seven pounds, if I could just lose seven pounds, I'll be happier or 10 pounds, or whatever it is, have you ever said that to yourself, and for me, and then the waiter would bring the menus around, and I would completely change into a different person, that other primitive brain would say, You know what, I'm just going to enjoy myself, I'm fine. Life is too short, everyone else is going to eat all the things I'm going to do better on Monday. So these two different ways of showing up for your life are not working. Because you're still here. You're listening to this podcast, and you want more for yourself. This is why I'm loving helping women on weight loss. It is so important. We wish it wasn't we wish it wasn't. But it is it keeps coming back to us. So it is a true desire. We want to be healthier, we want to enjoy our bodies, we want to feel like we look good. We want to feel good, and we want to be healthy, it is important to us. But I want to tell you doing this work, figuring this out for yourself solving this weight loss and permanence for yourself is so important. And it's so much more important than just about weight loss. It's so much more than just being thinner. I don't think I realized that until I figured out how to lose weight and keep it off and still enjoy myself. Until I learned how to think about food. I didn't realize how important it was. I don't think I realized how it would affect my whole life. And I'll tell you a story that I was just in Nashville. And I was talking to one of the other coaches I don't know her very well. But we started talking and she goes, Hey, I see that you're doing weight loss now. And I said, Yeah, I'm loving it. She said, tell me why. And it was interesting, because I actually started kind of convincing her I was telling her, Yes, I'm helping women lose weight. But it's so much more than weight loss, it's so much more important than some people might think it is at the surface level. And as I was talking to her, she took out her phone and she started looking for something because she was this thin, fit, beautiful woman. And she all of a sudden she held up her phone and she showed me a picture where she was significantly heavier. And in I almost got a little bit emotional because I thought oh my god, here I am trying to convince her that this work is so important. It's more than just the pounds on a scale. It's just so much more important. And she looked at me, she goes, I know it is so much more important. And I looked at her and I just I almost kind of took a deep breath and I go right and she goes Yes. And I said, being in a body and she was just like shaking her head like yes, it's so much more important than just about losing weight. It's about you being able to trust yourself, it's about you committing to what you truly desire. It's about you taking your one life and living it to your best ability. But I think more than anything else, I already said this, and I'll say it again, it's what you want. And I think that's why it keeps coming back to you. It's doing something for you because you want it for you. So the two ways you've been showing up in your life have not worked, the diets don't work and trying to convince yourself that it doesn't matter doesn't work. What does work is learning how to eat better forever. Okay, I just came up with that. And it's simple. I'm gonna actually turn that into an Instagram post. Yes. What does work is learning how to eat better forever. Learning how to do what you know you should do. And I don't usually love the word should. But so many of my clients have used this word. So many of my clients have said, I know what to eat, I just have not been able to get myself to do it. I know or they'll say I know what I should do, I just him not doing it. So you need to learn how to do it. And it's very simple. You need to learn how to make a good choice when you're at a restaurant and have a good time. You need to learn how to have one glass of wine instead of three if that's what you want to do, and still have a good time. And you can replace that wine with Margarita or breadbasket whatever. You need to learn how to work out at three o'clock in the afternoon when you said you would it's almost three Like, that's why I'm saying that one, you need to learn how to pass on the garlic bread even though it smells amazing. Or you need to learn how to only have one piece. You need to learn how to follow through with your true desires. But you need to learn how to do these things, not just for a month, you need to learn how to do these things permanently. I want you to imagine if you could do these things. Can you imagine how after even a few weeks how your life would change? Besides the weight loss? And yes, you would lose weight. That's obvious, and it's important. But what else would change for you? Can you imagine having the skill to trust yourself in the moment? Can you imagine how that would feel? And I remember when I figured all of this out, I remember feeling so powerful. And I remember having the thought if I can do this, I can do anything. And the coolest part about this is I've had clients come back to me and say, I feel like I can do anything. And I'm like, oh my god, it almost makes me emotional. Because like, yes, that is how I felt, if I could do this, I can do anything. I have to do a whole podcast, I do a whole podcast on the effects of this work on the rest of your life. Because this skill is transferable to every area. That's why you feel that powerful. If I can do this, I can do anything type of concept. So I hear you when you say you're worried you'll gain the weight back. Because the way you've done things in the past has not worked. And it's okay that it hasn't I know it sucks, but it's okay that it hasn't. But it's time to try something different. It's time to stop looking back at what hasn't worked, right, we now see why it didn't. But let's look forward to create new results in our lives. My one on one program is the solution for this desire to create something different mindset and strategy coaching is the core of my program. And it's what makes weight loss permanent. It's what diets are missing. It's what you have tried in the past is missing. I was so tired of the back and forth between dieting and then trying to convince myself I didn't care. And then of course shaming and beating myself up for the back and forth. And for not being able to figure it out. Because I feel like I'm smart. Why am I I'm smart, I'm educated, I'm intelligent. Why am I not figuring this out? That I'm just so grateful I found coaching and was able to overcome this part of my life. I'm grateful I was able to learn all these skills, so I can now teach them to you. So my program works because it changes the way you think it changes you. And when you change you, you show up differently for your life permanently. So I hope this makes you feel seen, I hope it makes your worries about gaining the weight back make more sense, especially if you haven't known there was another way. And I'll tell you that when clients sign up with me and they start working with me, they carry this worry for a while. Sometimes I've even had a client carried up to five months, I'm just worried I'm gonna gain it back and I go, I know you are, I know you're worried. But you will get to a point where you feel confident that you will not gain it back. And when they have that moment where they say to me, You know what, I'm a new person in this area of my life. I'm not going to gain the weight back I think totally differently about all of it. I feel so much in control about my food and about my workouts and about the way I live my life when they get to that moment. It is an amazing day. So I hope you reach out and you book a consultation with me if you are loving the podcast, or reach out to ask me a question. I spend most of my time on LinkedIn and Instagram. So reach out and chat with me. I would love to talk with you. I'd love to hear which podcasts are your favorite and answer any questions you might have. Have a great Tuesday. If you are ready to lose weight and keep it off permanently, if you have tried diets and you know they don't work and you're ready for real change. I would love to have a conversation with you. I coach women privately one on one, and I'm currently offering consultations to talk about working together. click my link in the show notes or head to Courtney Gray coaching.com Or you can find me on Instagram at Courtney Gray coaching