Things We Wish We Didn't Know (and Wish We Knew Sooner)

In this episode, we talk about the experiences we wish we'd known before we learned them the hard way-- and some things we wish we didn't know.

From relationships and adulthood to family dynamics and life in general, we reflect on the conversations that never happened when we were growing up and how that shaped us. We also discuss why we're much more open and forthcoming with our own kids, believing that knowledge, honesty, and communication prepare them better than silence ever could.

Some lessons are unavoidable. Others could have been a little easier if someone had simply talked about them.

Our kids may not always like what we tell them, but they'll never be able to say nobody told them.

So that's exactly what we're doing — talking out loud.

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:02

What is that from when it was like in the five?

SPEAKER_01 0:05

Four, three, two, you were on. What movie is that? Oh my god, that's gonna bother me. That's gonna bother me. You were on. No, I'm not pretty good.

SPEAKER_02 0:24

Welcome to the show, folks. This is how our lives continually present themselves.

SPEAKER_01 0:31

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 0:32

Oh no.

SPEAKER_03 0:34

I literally am not gonna be able to think about anything else. You were on. It's a it's a black girl. It's the way she said you were on. Oh my god, it's gonna bother me. And I'm gonna think about it as soon as we get off. What are we drinking today? I'm truly upset. Like I don't know. I can't focus. Um not tequila. You know, if I was drinking tequila, I wouldn't, I would have got it. I would have got it on the spot. So I had a bottle of champs, which I normally don't drink. I like top it in something, usually with tequila. But I don't I don't know what I was thinking today, and I just decided to pour straight champagne in the cup. And here it is. I put a little like lychee juice just to not have the champagne. But this is like my third cup, so I'm very joyful. And then I'm gonna really sleep, really sleepy later. So I'm gonna get a great night's sleep. But champs and lychee juice. Right. I'm drinking um a concoction of things that I had in this beautiful cabinet here. I have Jen, because Jen will make you sin. Uh some Elder Flat, some Saint Germain, a little lemon juice, and a little liche. It's a good time.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

It's a good time.

SPEAKER_03 2:02

Oh my god, I love her. What is her name? Oh yeah, what is her name? Because a little protein, a little protein to start today. Kudos to her. I really like the clavicle is still in track. I love her. To know me is to know I love a good chicken Caesar salad. I love a good Caesar salad, which while she's playing, so do I. Yes. I really enjoy a good Caesar salad. But when people say that they make it with anchovies, it it disgusts me. And yet I still love the Caesar salad. So this is the moments where you're just like, I didn't need to know that. Yeah. I was okay. You're right. I was okay with not knowing that there was raw fish in it or whatever anchovies are. Speaking of, and this is very off topic, but this is what you're getting on. Champagne is like sugar high. It's like Adderall for children for me. I'm on I'm here, there, I'm everywhere. It's like that bouncy ball and it goes all over the room. That's how I feel right now. So I'm sorry in advance. Um and what was I about to say? Oh. The things I wish I didn't know. So, like pregnancy. I am one of those like, don't talk to me about what's going on. I'm not excited. I'm not, I don't want to know what size it is. I don't care what it looks like inside. It's a size of a one. No, thanks. I didn't want to know any of that. And I did have those little like emails that told you every week like what the size. Sure, let you know. Fine. I'm fine with it. But at the doctor's office, please don't. Don't tell me what's about to happen. You're gonna stick your whole arm up the kooty coup. I don't want to know. Like, just do it. Because if you're gonna prep me ahead of time, I'm going to panic. I'm going to panic. I'm not having a good time. So just not, oh, not at least. Even when I like, because I I have high blood pressure. Thank you. It's familial. Um, genetic. Just I'll let y'all guess I'm a parent. Um when they when I go to get my blood drawn every three months, um, they're always well, if I go to a random place, they're just like, Are you okay? And I'm like, Oh, yeah, I'm fine. I just look away, like I don't see the excitement in looking at the needle pass. Um, but yeah, they're always like, Are you? I'm like, yeah, I'm fine. Like, I just don't, like, I do have kids that like want to see it. And I'm like, I'll hold your hand. Um, but I'm not gonna tell you like what size it is. Is it a big needle? Why? That's so unhelpful to me. Don't don't tell me. Don't tell me about the birth. Are you kidding? When people get excited when like there's the baby's kicking and oh my god, come barf. I don't care. Yes, I've had three children. I don't care. I was just about to say, you've had how many kids? And you're like, it's kicking, and I would never know. You would never know that I had children the way that I'm talking about. Like pregnancy and birth and the stomach, the baby kicking, and like ew. It makes my stomach turn. Even now, I'm like, things I'd rather not know. Do you have any? No, yes, it is surgeries. I don't need to know what's about to happen. I'd rather just wake up. And that's the other thing. I need to be asleep. Like, you know, dental thing. Like, I don't want to be um alert or aware while you're drilling on my teeth. No, thanks. Thank you. And we do have a sister who's obsessed with watching surgeries before they happen. And I just wait for her to say, Oh, it's not that bad. Thank you. That's that's all I needed to know. It's not that bad, or I saw it and it's they're gonna do this, this, and this. Okay, thank you. But then she sends it to you. So when I have my gallbladder out, she's she watched it and she's like, Oh, it's not that bad. But it was after it was after I'd already had it done, and she sent me the video, and I'm like, who who put this up on YouTube? Who was allowed to just record people like her who need to see it multiple times? Let me rewind, let me fast-forward. What is this knife doing? No, girl, I smoked this. Thank God I'd already had it, or I would have really panicked, and I already was panicking because I'm about to be put out. No thanks. Um, I didn't have a choice, it was like emergency, and then I had pancreatitis, so I had to sit there for five days and let the swelling go down. Those were the days when I was drinking straight whipped vodka. Oh my god, pinnacle? Good day, please. Straight whipped vodka, like nothing else, but it was so freaking sweet. Hence why I don't drink vodka today. But uh, I just remember always saying like myself. There's one brand of one vodka. That is not a that's not fair. I think that started like the alcohol poisoning. Now, of course, they don't say pancreatitis is due to alcoholism, but it's one of them, and I'm pretty sure that was the one for me because I wasn't doing anything else. Drinking all the time, in that was like the what seven-year mark of the marriage. So mm-hmm, me and Pinnacle. And I just remember when that doctor came back and said, You have pancreatitis, and had to explain what that is because I'd never heard of it. And I was I just remember looking at my ex-husband like, I told you my stomach hurt. So you could have um heated fellowship with me, as Duran Bernard would say. And girl, I just remember being so mad, and mom was there the whole time. Bless her heart. She was there because he wasn't. Um, she said those five days I can only have ice chips, swelling went down in the tip of my gallbladder. When that sister sent me that surgery, thank God I'd already had it done. And I was just like, that's what they did. Yeah, no. Disgusting. Like I'm still glad you tell me. I just remember waking up and he was like, lots of blood. He had like an accent, lots of blood. You could have left that out. You could have left that out too. Everybody doesn't want to know, or I'm not in this profession. This is not exciting for me. I don't want to know these things. There's a reason why I don't, I don't know, in the medical field. No, which is odd because I was definitely pre-med when I entered college. God knew, he knew there was no way I was gonna make it through that. He wanted me to deliver someone's baby. Because in my mind, I was gonna be an ob-gen. Yes, that movie with Jennifer Lopez on Netflix, the one that I just that just came out, off as romance. I don't know if that's the title. Camera, watch it. Yes, and I saw that and I was like, what? Why did they show the baby's head coming out of her kucha coup? Disgusting. And more than once, and I was like, I remember like watching it by myself, and I was just like, oh my god! Like, I can't believe they actually showed that. And of course, his face, when I look at my face, it was exactly the same. Like, I would never recover. I'm so glad they don't have, I don't know, did first face actions, do they have like mirrors down there? Like, does anybody look? There's a whole sheet that they put right here. I'm laying down, eyes looking straight at the ceiling. There's this whole thing here, and then I'm looking down at the ground because I can see Chantelle's feet tippy-toeing when she says, Becca, you're gonna feel a lot of pressure. I'm like, Okay. And then all of a sudden I'm like, she's like, just breathe, everything's fine. And I'm like, why does it it didn't hurt? It just felt like an elephant was standing on my stomach. And I'm looking down and I'm seeing her feet off the floor as she's pushing on my stomach. And then they say, baby's out, 807. What? I could never and then they show her, and I'm like, that's not mine. That's not my kid. I she's not chocolate with dimples. You have a C-section for those that don't understand. Oh, yes, I had a C-section. So nothing was coming out of my cooter. So I don't know. So that's why I think seeing it on this movie was just like, is that what it looks like? Can you imagine like doing that all day and then just going to dinner with your friends as a doctor? Like, hey, oh my god. No meat. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. You mean rare? No. I don't want to see blood for the rest of my life. There's I couldn't do it. Like, if I even just watching that, and it wasn't, I don't even know if there was blood there because I looked away immediately. But like the umbelical, like just ew. No.

unknown 11:00

Ew.

SPEAKER_03 11:01

And then afterbirth, too. I mean, and the crazy part is I tried, I tried to be there for one of my nieces', you know, entrances into the world. And, you know, my parents told me no that I was 16 and that I didn't need to be there for that. And I was so mad at them for that because I was like, I need to be there. And I'm so glad, you know, hindsight that they didn't allow me to go. And then I tried it with you. And I was in school, and you were smackity smacking on food. And I'm like, hey, what's up? And you're like, yeah. So I just had him. And I'm like, Are you kidding? I've been sitting here writing this stupid paper this whole time. I could have 100% been there. And you're like, Yeah. Like you just came like really quick. And I'm like, oh. Then after I had my kid, my sister has another kid. I try to make it for that one, but my child kept trying to push the buttons on the the uh bed that makes you go up and down, and so we had to leave because she wouldn't leave things alone. Was that me or no? That was angry. I was like, I was like, really? And so I just kept trying to push the buttons, and I was like, We're like we're gone. You clearly cannot make it. And again, I think that was God protecting me because you're right, there's no way. That's the sad part too, is because the TV shows back then, they didn't, they weren't real, so they didn't give you like a real you know, oh, this is what labor is like. I like I mean, hello Martin. That one episode where the girl pops it out and Tommy's like, wait a minute, wait a minute, there's no umbilical cord. He's like, We don't need no umbilical cord. This is TV. Yes. No, I mean I I mean stories where people are actually like screaming like that, but maybe if they didn't have an epidural, of course, like mine were the boys. I had I had epidurals, and then I had I I had an induction. So I was there like the night before or the day before, like I was pretty chill, which my only like fear was that my water would break somewhere inappropriate. So priorities, like at work, like I just wasn't ready. Like, what's it gonna feel like? What's like what's it gonna be? Is the baby gonna fall out when the water breaks? Like that was my thing. I remember when I when I had my first, I would I watched a lot of what channel was that? TLC. I feel like I'm the same, yes. And had like the I didn't know I was pregnant, yeah, the trauma show where it was like some very like outlandish thing. And I just kept saying, if all these people can have kids and they're fine, I'll be alright. I'm gonna be okay. And that kind of eased me for if my water broke, but then it never did, so I was fine. And then the only the the thing you were referring to was my firstborn. The nurse came in to like show me how to push for whenever it was time, and he was already like right there. So she's like, um, let me go get the doctor. And then the doctor came. I mean, I I don't even remember it. It probably was like two pushes, and he was out when the doctor came. So I mean it was just super quick. And then I just remember saying, like, did I miss dinner? Because dinner was like running certain time. Where's the that's the only reason why I remembered the time of his birth, because it was 6 42 p.m. And dinner ended at 7. So I was like, Did I miss dinner? And they were like, No, it's okay, you can and maybe. The only thing I like about being in the hospital is that I can circle my food. That was that was the thing. I'll give you that. I don't want to say take me back. I didn't mean that. I didn't mean that, but that's what I enjoyed from being in the hospital. Well, speaking of all of the things that we were not prepped for as adults, but like there was a lot of things that it was just kind of like no one told. I'll say us, because I feel like you and I were, you know, always the closest, but there was a lot of things that was not explained to us growing up. Definitely not sex. What? No, no, relationships, also a no. Dating birth. Oh, please. No, not even like, no, I think we talked about this, you know, not on the podcast, but I was like, did they just expect us to like get a certain age and then just marry our husband and then we have sex for the first time? We're gonna know, we're gonna know how to keep that marriage alive. Like that, none of that was its point. No, not what to look for in a man. Like nothing. There was just, and I don't know if that's just a generational thing or a Christian thing or a cultural, like black person. Like, I don't know, but I just feel like the way that we let me rephrase the way that I got my information was either through my older sister or through my friends. And then I would get it from my friends and give it to my older sister, and she'd be like, You think that you're gonna get pregnant by putting a tamp on it? I'd be like, Yes, mom said that I don't even remember how mom said that. I mean, it was like a thing, or if you're wearing tampons, that means you're not a virgin. Yes, there it is. Because I mean that definitely has been passed down, like, oh, you want to tamp, like, thank God Tatum's not. But I can't imagine, like, if she was, I would immediately think I did. But well, I mean, I hate to out my kid, but my kid didn't find out how to put that on for me. She found that out from one of the dance kids she was with, and she just happened to be like, Mom, can I get another da-da-da-da-da? And I was like, wait, what? And I was like, wait, how did you how do you know how to put that in? She's like, Oh, so-and-so told me. And I was like, Wait, told you? She's like, Yeah, we were swimming and I wanted to keep swimming. And it was just, it was just so nonchalant. I was like, I wanted to keep swinging, uh swimming, so she told me how to put one in so I could keep swimming. That's very true. I do remember going to a party and it was a swim party, and I started my period. But I think I'd already, I think why I'd already knew how to do it. But I mean, our older sister told me, so I knew there it is. But thanks, and I remember telling, I remember telling mom later in life, like, you know, you never talked to us about or me. And she was like, Oh, I just assumed about you know what I'm also trying to tell you. Assume your sisters told you. And I was like, I mean, they did. Why would we assume that? Why wouldn't you, as our mother, maybe it was embarrassment. I mean, I'm not trying to speak for her or for daddy, but they were both in like the medical field. Like, why wouldn't you tell us? Yeah. Yeah. But I will say that in having a child, yes, I 100%. I mean, I tried to do my best in like, I mean, there was a lot of conversations, unfortunately, that my kid and I had to have well before I was prepared to have them. And so my struggle was trying to find a way to have these conversations in like in uh like in an elementary type of way. You know, in my mind, I'm thinking, okay, by the time you get to like middle school or something like that, okay, we're having these conversations. There's language, there's communication, you know, we can do that. But if you're four and I'm having to have this conversation, I'm trying to find the same language that I would have used for like a middle schooler to try to like not dumb it down to make it seem like you know, four girls are dumb, but you know, you just have to find a different way of saying that. I remember my kid asking about why her dad and I weren't together. And I was just like, oh, and the way that our car was set up, because we spent a lot of time in the car, is that she would be sitting in the far, was it right side of the car? And so I would often do this, you know, where I would like look out the window so she couldn't see my face because I'd be like, um, did you ask your dad? Like, did you ask him? And she's like, Yeah, he said to ask you. Like, of course. Of course he did. Of course. I was like, you know, sweetie, sometimes, you know, mommies and daddies just don't make a sound. Like, what do you say to that? And then, like, you know, some months would go by, and then she'd be like, So why are you and daddy not together? Because my friend so-and-so, her mommy and daddy are together. And I'm like, Of course they are, yes. Uh-huh. That's all. I mean, it wasn't until she was like, I don't know, middle school or high school. And I'm sure she'll tell the story. I don't know if I've told it multiple times, but we just happened to be sitting in our parking spaces, and she was like, I don't know, I feel like she was like 15, maybe 14, 15. Anyways, we're sitting in the car. It's like 11 o'clock at night, and she's like, Mom, and I'm like, Yes. And she's like, Can you please just tell me what happened between you and dad? Oh. And I was like, you know what? You really want to know? And she was like, Yeah. I said, All right. I said, but let me let me do my disclaimer. I said, I'm not innocent. We both, we both did some bad things, but if you want to know the story, I'm gonna tell you the whole story. And we sat in that car from like 10, 30, 11 o'clock that night to like two o'clock in the morning. And we just and and she listened to me and she's like, wait, you did what? I guess I don't. And she'd be like, wait, he did da-da-da-da. I'm like, mm-hmm. And then we walked up out of there. But there were so many years of her life that I was like, nope, I am not going to taint your relationship with him. You need to figure that out on your own. So anytime it would be like, I don't know. Did you ask him? Oh, that's crazy. You know, let's move on. Do you want to watch Barbie? Do you want to go get some ice cream? You know, I was really good at just being like, let's do something else. Let's we get our nails done. Let's not talk about those hard things. But I feel like there's definitely those moments that I think about, like, man, my mother would never, my father would never be like, oh yes, let me tell you about the birds and the bees. Yeah, it's not gonna work out. And I don't know if it was, I don't know. Part of me feels like it's because if they said that, that that was gonna, we were gonna run out there and have sex in their minds. Like, oh, if we talk about drinking, they're gonna go drink. I'm gonna drink if you talk about it or not. I'm gonna smoke if you talk about it or not. I'd rather you talk about it and tell me the pros and the cons. Let me know you are not real person. And you've done real things, like, yeah. Well, you you know the situation, Louis. Little girl. And yeah, I had to tell her my own experiences and what she's doing right now. And I mean, she's my third kid, so I'm not it's not like taboo anymore. I feel like she's I think it's more sad for me because she's finally at the age where I can tell her like real life stuff. And she get it because she's about to go into high school. And I'm like, I did this, you know, at this age. Like, I mean it's not innocent. I'm telling you, it's very funny. Don't feel like you can't talk to me. Because I think that was like that was hard for me, was like relating to my parents and until I got married, which was I was still a baby, I was 18. Um it there wasn't like a real side to my parents. It was just like this church like glass screen, whatever I'm trying to say, of just like they weren't real. Like they'd never done anything wrong in their life, they didn't have any experience with me. As we know, Daddy has lived a lot of life. I'm just now finding out about that life as an adult.

unknown 23:01

Right.

SPEAKER_03 23:02

We didn't know that because of that how they portrayed themselves as parents was like holier than now, if you will. So we didn't know that they could relate to the things that we were actually going to because they've never shared those experiences with us, as where we do with our kids, to let them know we're real people. We've made mistakes. This isn't like a 1980 thing because you know, kids love to say you're old and you don't know what I'm talking about, and blah blah blah. But it's like this same stuff, the same stuff occurs. It's really no different. No, just knowing that your parents are aware of what you may be going through, I think would have been more helpful to me as a child, but they were in their own world. Yeah. And I mean, I I want to give like grace and sympathy for that too. Like, I get it. You're trying to raise, you know, four kids, and you know, you're trying to, you know, make a life for yourself. I get all that.

unknown 23:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 23:58

But I mean, hell, I'm I'm proud of the the the woman that I turned out to be. So I mean, I'm not, I'm not mad, I'm not bitter or anything like that. But there was definitely things that I saw that I was like, I'm never I'm gonna tell my kid up front, hey, there's nothing that you're gonna do that I haven't either already done or I tried to do as well. So you might as well just tell me what you're trying to do. So I could be like, okay, go out there and do that. But let me tell you what's gonna happen. It's gonna happen, this is gonna happen, this is gonna happen. Now you go out there and have a good time. Now, my kid is definitely one of the ones where you tell her that the stove is hot and she's like, okay. And she still needs to put her hand over it to be like, oh, it's hot. Mm-hmm. You you you do you believe me now that you've tested it out for yourself? But I mean, I'm sure she'll probably have stories of her own when she gets my age, she'll be like, Ma, do you know that I did that? I'd be like, Yes, I did. You thought I didn't, but I just didn't feel the need to call you out on everything. Like, you go out there and live your life. Right. Everything is not a dire emergency. Like you're gonna do it at some point. I'm glad that you because I just said that with when I first got divorced, like with little girl, it was like, I feel like I'm experiencing like the teenage years when she was nine. Like fourth grade was the hardest year to run away. She tried to run away twice. Like she was gone for like three and a half hours the second time. And I'm wait, I don't think I know that story was girls. One of her friends told her that I didn't care about her. What should be well? I was like, I was out. I had just found her, so I was not calm. I'm gonna be honest. I was like, oh get the yeah, that's how I was. Who is an F when she thinks? Who is she? I'm taking care of you. Like, what? She was gone for three hours. Three and a half hours. She went to play outside, and I like nobody knew where she was. She, when I finally got her, another mom had said, like, she's here at my house, girl, come go get her. So I was like, Thank you. Went to go get her. And she just she looked like nothing was wrong. Like, why am I upset? Like, she's been here all along. Lies. So I was like, Where were you? She tried to say, I was like, no, take me to the house. She acted like she was in the neighborhood. Take me to the house. She took me to some house. I was like, that's not true. She acted like she didn't know where the house was. She forgot. Already knew it was a lie. And what's funny is she was she was in the neighborhood, but I met the mom like months later, and it was the house that she said she was at. And I was like, You live here? Because we were in the street. She was like, Oh, I live right here. I was like, Do you? And your daughter's name is Huh. I said, She was missing a while back, and she said she was at your house, and it was like, I'm I just wanted one of those mom moments where it was like, it was the Lord. She was not at her house, clearly, because she tried to take me out a totally different way, and that girl's house was way over here. I don't know, I still to this day don't know where she was. She said she was playing, she was trying to go to her dad's house because he wouldn't pick her up, who lived with his girlfriend and her big new baby girl. Um, I obviously she was 12, but she was she was 28. She was 28 with like a two-year-old, and obviously my husband was 40 plus. Um but yeah, they lived like 30 minutes away, and she like he just always was like, Where's your mom? Where's your mom? Like he wouldn't come get her. So I think she just got mad and like told me she was going to play outside and like was literally missing for three and a half hours. I pissed. This doesn't explain it. And then I of course I took her phone and she was like, Why are you taking my phone? Fourth grade. Fourth grade. I just felt like I went through the teenagers already. So I was like, Oh, I'm I'm good. Everything else after that, no worries, but then started like the going out and like not returning the plans falling through, and you don't have a ride, and you're still at somebody somewhere. It was just ridiculous.

SPEAKER_02 28:21

That's always something with these kids.

SPEAKER_03 28:24

I mean, trying to make sure that they know things that they don't know, and then like you know, we were talking earlier about just like summer, and you know, what happens when they're not doing anything during the summer. No, I don't want you outside at some Rando's house for three and a half hours, but I also don't want you cooped up in this house, not doing anything either. I don't know. She's always always been out and about. That's why I'm like, God, I'm glad you don't want to go because then I would be up there with you in the dorm. Mm-hmm at this point. You're not going anywhere. When she can drive, no, I'm gonna be in the car with you. She's gonna pick up every stray from the street. Well, they didn't have a ride. Okay, I will say this because my kid is a hustler as well. And so there was many a days that she was having to find her own way home. So when she finally got her own set of wheels, I do feel like she was absolutely that way. Like, almost like I need to repay for putting it forward because so many people gave me rides. So I feel I need to give them rides. That's cool or whatever. Like, I get it, as long as it's in the, you know, like it's either on your way home, you know, like it's not like I'm taking somebody all the way downtown. No, it's not anything like that, but I feel you on that too. It's just, you know, the older they get, the the anxiety changes. You know, when they're middle school, it is definitely like identity and belonging and rejection and you know, being chosen and all of these things. And then they get to high school and it's like the bullying, you know, it's just like it just the it just shifts. It doesn't mean that we as parents stop caring. And I'm saying this because I'm also thinking about our parents. And I'm thinking, I mean, we're all grown adults, and I'm sure there's still like, you know, there's still some kind of anxiety that they have there. It just shifts as we, you know, engage in these like new experiences or these new versions of ourselves or like these new relationships. You know, we're adults. I'm divorced. I'm a single parent. I live outside the state. Our relationship is very, very different now. So I'm sure there is anxieties that they have now. My kid lives away from me. There's 100%. But you know, we have technologies now that we did not have back then. Mine, I could just go and look and find my iPhone, be like, oh, she's at work. Don't come bother her while she's at work, or oh, she's at home FaceTime. And and please don't answer. The fact that Apple has the way that we can record the videos when the people don't answer, because I'm like, often, but I mean mostly because we just answer, but yeah. I mean, I think you you're the probably the only person I do that with, and that's only if I like had something to say like right then. But even when I got divorced and lived back with with mom and dad, and I was going to my my friend's house in the country, and she was like, And what's the address? I'm 35. Like coming to Tyler, Texas, like what? I was just like, yeah, it was like we're your covenant partner now, and I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_02 31:50

Well we that's another scripture is that in by the by.

SPEAKER_03 31:55

I don't, I have never found that scripture. And what does that mean? Because again, all of the appliances in my home are working against me. Does that mean my covenant partners? Are y'all coming to replace? I just want to know what the definition is. That's it. And where is that in the Bible? I need proof, I need to be able to reference it, I need to be able to put in the bibliography testament who said it. I feel like it's a new testament. And on that note, that's our time. Until next time, make sure you talk out loud. Bye.