Real Food Stories
The question of "what to eat" can feel endlessly confusing, especially when we contend with our own deeply ingrained beliefs and stories around food. Blame social media, the headline news, and let's not get started on family influences. Passed down from generations of women and men to their daughters, it's no wonder women are so baffled about how to stay healthy the older we get.
As a nutritionist and healthy eating chef, combined with her own personal and professional experience, Heather Carey has been connected to years of stories related to diets, weight loss, food fads, staying healthy, cooking well, and eating well. Beliefs around food start the day we try our first vegetables as babies and get solidified through our families, cultures, and messages we receive throughout our lifetime.
We have the power to call out our food beliefs so we can finally make peace with what we eat and get on with enjoying the real food and lives we deserve. Listen in to find out how to have your own happy ending to your real food story. Connect with Heather at heather@heathercarey.com or visit her website at www.heathercarey.com or www.greenpalettekitchen.com
Real Food Stories
112. Beyond Boundaries: Rediscovering Yourself After 40
Elizabeth Cush, licensed clinical counselor and women's life coach, explores the complex challenges of midlife and menopause for women who feel overwhelmed by physical changes, shifting family dynamics, and societal expectations.
• Menopause brings significant physical and emotional changes that can make women feel disconnected from their former selves
• Brain fog, memory issues, and body changes are common experiences during perimenopause and menopause
• Women often struggle with the "illusion of control" as their bodies change in ways that dieting cannot prevent
• Self-compassion is more effective than self-criticism for creating positive change and emotional wellness
• Research shows being kind to yourself creates better outcomes than harsh self-judgment
• Boundary-setting is essential for women who have been socialized to prioritize others' needs above their own
• Caregiving without boundaries leads to depletion, resentment, and strained relationships
• Being highly sensitive is a genetic trait that affects how deeply you process sensory information
• Change is possible at any age - even when external options seem limited, internal transformation remains available
Connect with Elizabeth through her counseling website at progressioncounseling.com, her coaching site at elizabethcush.com, or through her podcast "Awaken Your Wise Woman."
Connect With Elizabeth for coaching HERE
Biz's Group Support for Sensitive Women HERE
Are You Highly Sensitive? Click HERE to find out.
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Hi everybody and welcome back to the Real Food Stories podcast. I've had something on my mind lately and not a little bit, but a lot and that is navigating life as a woman in midlife and menopause. We have so much on our plate during this time of our lives with empty nesting aging parents, our careers, our health, our hormones, just to name a few and life can feel hard, to say the least, which is why I am so glad to have connected with my guest today, elizabeth Kush. Elizabeth is a licensed clinical professional counselor and a woman's life coach. As a coach, biz, as she likes to be called, helps midlife women who feel overwhelmed and unfulfilled embrace and embody their inner wise woman so that they can fully enjoy the beautiful life they've created. Biz is also the host of the Awaken your Wise Woman podcast. Okay, biz, let's just jump right in and thank you for coming on the show today, because I'm excited to talk to you.
Speaker 2:Thanks, for having me Heather.
Speaker 1:Sure. Why does midlife, especially for women, feel so hard sometimes? Are we a special population? Or is this all about midlife, or does everyone kind of go through just feeling hard? And you know life is hard?
Speaker 2:Well, I feel like for me anyway. Growing up, you always heard about men going through this midlife crisis and getting like a young girlfriend or a new car or something like that. But I think there's some awareness now that women go through something similar when they hit midlife. So I think it's probably a pretty common experience. But I think the added piece to that for women one is menopause or perimenopause right, that our bodies are physically, I was going to say, disrupting, but they're changing. They are, you know, the hormones are swirling, we're feeling differently, there's a lot going on.
Speaker 2:And then you add to that, like if you were a mother, potentially your kids are moving on to something new. You maybe, if you hadn't worked, you're considering going back to work because now you have this time, or you're looking towards retirement, like, okay, so what does that mean? I'm going to be now in this space where I don't work anymore, or what am I going to do with myself then more? Or you know, what am I going to do with myself then? So it's really sort of. I think for many people, midlife is a time where we're reevaluating where we were, where we are now and where we want to be.
Speaker 1:Yeah, without a doubt. I mean I feel like this time in my life like no joke, I mean I am. I am reevaluating my entire life, my career, the direction I'm taking my career in, just how I see myself physically. I mean sometimes I feel like I've almost been like split into people like my life before I mean let's call it menopause my life before menopause and the me I am right now, because they just almost feel like like that feels like a like my old life like feels like something from like the way distant past, the dark ages.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and now I'm like sort of out in, like the like, navigating on my own. No one really prepares you for this time of your life and there's just so much change going on with our bodies and aging parents. Yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 2:I didn't even add that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, big changes, so it can feel really hard sometimes and overwhelming and overwhelming.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I know for sure I'm thinking. You know I hit perimenopause or no full menopause when I was like 47. And you know that was a long time ago. I'm 64 now, but I remember just feeling just so almost lost in a way. It's like well, one, what now? But also just physically I didn't feel like myself anymore, like I felt like I had brain fog, I was forgetting things. I remember a conversation with my older sister and like I was like I'm wondering if I have like early onset Alzheimer's, that I am just I feel so unlike myself. And she laughed, she's like it's menopause, like don't worry, you're fine. And she was right. But yeah, it definitely can feel like a very disrupting time. But I also, looking back, it also prompted me to make a lot of changes in my life which ended up being incredibly positive.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So let's talk about change like that, because I feel like you know you could certainly. You know I'm not. I'm going to be totally honest, like there's a part of me that is just like resisting like aging, like I just want, like I don going to be totally honest, like there's a part of me that is just like resisting like aging, like I just want, like I don't want to get older, because I don't feel older, like I, you know, but but I, I there's probably something to embracing and and flowing with it, because there's nothing we could do.
Speaker 1:We're getting older anyway, but there's yeah so just that you know like sort of flow, feeling and then maybe being excited about the possibilities. Sometimes all I see is like the dark and stormy, or like you know there's yeah problems ahead, but there's definitely a lot of possibilities and good things coming right. So you know, when you see clients, when they come to you as, like you know, they're women in midlife tell me a few things. Does this sound familiar to you?
Speaker 1:what I'm talking about, or you know, is, there other common themes and patterns that you see with the people that you coach, and absolutely so let's talk about like just common things. So I think we all don't feel so alone in our struggles.
Speaker 2:Sure, well one, the realization of our bodies aging right Are the wrinkles, the saggy skin, like that physical component, but also just feeling older, even if emotionally I feel young. You know, I notice some of the physical and I think my clients are noticing those things too, and I, you know, I don't always embrace that I'm aging, but I'm learning to accept it and I guess that is my hope to help my clients get to that place too, that an acceptance of, yes, sometimes it feels really hard and how can I approach this from a more compassionate mindset, like how can I give myself some grace when it does feel hard but also get excited about the potential for what is next? You know, I think for some women it's grandchildren. You know this new generation that comes into their lives. I have not had that experience, but I see how fulfilling that can be at this part of you know, this time in their lives and in our life.
Speaker 2:But for me personally it was like, well, now I have this opportunity to do other things. You know. Well fortunate, you know, I feel fortunate in that. Well fortunate, you know, I feel fortunate in that you know I'm at a place where I can travel or I can, you know, take time off and do things that you know, do things that I want to do. But for clients like I think it's really just helping them better understand, sort of those internal messages that we're giving ourselves like this, you know, hating our bodies or shaming ourselves around where we are right now, versus can I offer some myself, some compassion for one if this feels really hard, but two, just knowing that there are others out there that are going through the same thing. I think that this is a common experience, that I think that can be really helpful too. But it's like, yeah, looking for values, Like what is it that you want with this part of your life? Now, you know?
Speaker 1:I think, yeah, feeling like you're not alone. You know, especially at this time of our lives when it can feel kind of lonely because we're not, I know you know again, for me, like I'm not like so bonded. You know, like I made a lot of my friends through my kids, you know, like through those moms, and now we're all sort of scattered or we're all different, you know doing different things, and it can sometimes feel, yeah, lonely or like you're alone, like you're kind of doing this alone. So I think that that's important.
Speaker 1:And then you said another thing about feeling out of control like our bodies. You know, like our bodies are changing so much that you know, when you have been dieting or like controlling your body for decades through diets, through whatever you know severe, like maybe not so severe, but then you go through menopause and that's a huge body shift. I mean right, even with all the best intentions. I mean you can, how your weight is distributed. It's, you know, maybe you've gained a little more weight in your belly and that can feel really, really shocking sometimes, you know, to some women and very, very hard change.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:You know and then I think you know. Then you just mentioned the word compassion and I think to really double down on trying to have some compassion for yourself and for the changes you're going through. But that can feel hard when you've been in control and then you feel like you cannot control the physical, at least part of your life.
Speaker 2:Does that make sense? Have?
Speaker 2:you seen that, oh, it makes so much sense. Yeah, well, but two, I just wanted to say, like it's the illusion of control, right? I mean, yes, we can diet or, you know, eat in very mindful ways to sort of maintain body weight, but really our body's gonna do what it's gonna do, right, I mean it's? And yes, so the shifting, I think, of where we are physically, you know, as you said, like sometimes you're you have the belly weighed or you know your skin doesn't look quite as youthful and glowing as it once did. There are people, you know, I, I know women who work really hard to continue with that control right To, whether it's surgical or through hormone replacement, which I think some people need because menopause can be very disruptive hormonally, but also plastic surgery, injections, things like there's so much out there that you can do to sort of continue with that illusion of control. But our bodies are gonna age faster inside, no matter what we're doing to the outside.
Speaker 1:Yeah Well, society in general doesn't like women getting older, right Than aging it's true, it's true. I mean, we do resist it on a very huge level. We do, we do. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 2:That's been a challenge, you know, I think for a lot of my clients, yeah, it's just accepting, you know, even with compassion, that maybe their body doesn't look the way it used to or the way they would like it to today so let's talk about that definition of compassion.
Speaker 1:You know because we've now thrown it out there a little bit what tell me, what you think of compassion, or what that means to you to have compassion for yourself as a woman going through midlife and a lot of changes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, I think a lot of it is. How a big piece of that is how you talk to yourself, right, like I know, I for many years I struggled with anxiety and, as I was learning to sort of listen to my own internal dialogue, realized that I was so unkind to myself, like if I made a mistake, you know, I ruminated on it for days afterwards like, oh, I should have never said that or I should never have done that. I can remember as a young woman, you know, beating myself up about my parenting, like, oh, I'm just, I could be so much better if I didn't just, you know, lose my shit on my kids or lose my sorry, excuse me you know, just, you know, just get angry or whatever.
Speaker 2:So I think so much of the what we can shift, what we can control is how we talk to ourselves, how we relate to us. That doesn't necessarily mean we're giving ourselves a pass, for when we do make mistakes it's sort of acknowledging nobody's perfect, everybody makes mistakes. So sort of that common human experience of we all are in this. We all none of us are perfect. We all struggle from time to time and yet can we then acknowledge how hard that is? Like it feels really hard and can I offer myself, you know, a hand on my heart or just a little word of encouragement, like, yeah, this feels really hard and I feel how hard that is, but can I be kind to myself in that?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I understand that. I mean, when you're, when you're bent like, I think, a lot of women years beating yourself up, right, because that's maybe how you grew up or that you know, or that's how you're supposed to be, the thought of being kind to yourself, you know, not being hard on yourself is foreign. I mean, I know that, I know for myself that was, that was me years ago. I mean I grew up in like the land of like diets, diet culture, big diet culture in my family and just let, and you know, like gaining weight, losing weight, diet culture in my family and just like, and you know, like gaining weight, losing weight, being hard on myself, having reprimand myself. And it wasn't until I really learned how to cultivate that self-compassion and kindness that I could finally like lose some weight and lose it and keep it off. I mean I for me, for my clients, for like, for I think in the world of weight loss and just body nutrition, kindness and compassion is everything.
Speaker 1:It's the missing link between being on like these punishing diets and just really taking care of yourself you know, and because you want to get healthy and you want to like and it's and it's like you're taking care of, like a, your inner child. I guess you know you can call it that, or yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, those parts of you that didn't get the love and care back then, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:And so kindness and compassion, I think, are just undervalued, underserved habits.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, I think that women need to cultivate, yeah, I think around, yes, diet culture, I think around mental wellness, I think around, yeah, our appearance. It's like we're so used to sort of comparing but also then criticizing. So you know, I think a piece of this self-compassion too is that mindful awareness. It's like we are becoming more aware of what we're telling ourselves, how we're treating ourselves Like. I can remember I don't know if you're familiar with Kristen Neff's work, but she's so, yeah, that she's all all about self-compassion. And I remember you know hearing her saying like self-compassion. And I remember you know hearing her saying like would you like one of her exercises? The way you talk to yourself? Would you ever say that to one, to a friend, but two to a total stranger, somebody you don't know? Would you ever ever talk that way to them? And the answer was like no, why? Of course not. And I was like, oh right, but it's okay to do that to myself.
Speaker 1:Exactly. Why is it okay? You would never think about talking the way you talk to yourself to a good friend. You would never criticize them, even somebody you don't like probably.
Speaker 2:I mean maybe you would, but you know I am not a hateful person and yeah, it's just like wow hateful person and yeah, it's just like, wow, how is that okay?
Speaker 1:But yeah, so kindness and compassion, I think, are the key, almost like the number one things that you have to have.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, as a self-care tool almost.
Speaker 1:As a self-care tool. I think that that is.
Speaker 2:you know, if you want to think of it as like a toolbox of things that you're carrying around with you, yeah, and I think one of the hardest parts of that is often people you know my clients will say but if I'm nice to myself, then how am I ever going to get better? How am I ever going to do this better? How am I ever going to actually lose weight or, you know, never make a mistake again. And the reality is like we're not perfect right. We will make another mistake potentially. And if we can relate to ourselves with kindness you know, whether it's around food and eating or around just life that actually helps us make change when we can offer that care and kindness. And there's research that shows that.
Speaker 1:Yes, there is research and I love research, so I love science, I love evidence, and there is research to show that that is like being kind and compassionate to yourself is much more effective than what you just said. You know, like that, your clients are like if I'm not beating myself up, how am I going to, how am I going to get myself to change? Which you know, as you said that out loud, I'm like that sounds ridiculous, but that is how I used to be with myself and that is how many many women are with themselves, right, I mean, if they're not hard on themselves, if they're not like beating themselves up, yeah, yeah, I mean I just have to be kind to myself and that's yes, yes, that is so much more effective, it's so much. I think it's so much longer lasting than beating yourself up, so much longer lasting than beating yourself up. But how do you get then? So you know, how do you get your clients to go from like that beating up themselves to really embracing and practicing compassion and self-kindness?
Speaker 2:Well, a lot of, particularly with therapy clients. But coaching clients, too, is really looking back at the messaging they received when, if they were making mistakes or overeating or not eating healthy food like, what were the caregivers to support people in your life? What were the messages that you were given? Right, because often what we're telling ourselves is stuff we've internalized from others, right? So it's like having an awareness of kind of repeating the patterns that were set in place back in the day when we were kids, and so being able to meet those you know and then, well, and often then I will reflect to them like well, is that how you're? You know, if they're parents, is that how you're treating your own children? And they'd be like no, of course not. Why would I? I would never do that. I was like all right, so how about?
Speaker 2:What would it be like to then offer what you give your children or what you give your best friend to yourself? And it can be gentle, it can be if that feels too hard, like if the idea of being kind to myself feels so difficult that it's almost you know, it's almost rejected, like we can't even take that in, because for some people, that is true it just feels so foreign or so uncomfortable that I'll say well, what about what would a friend say to you right now? You know, can you internalize that? Or how would your, if your dog could talk, that you know loves you to death unconditionally, how would he respond to your suffering? And can you give yourself that? And it could be a, you know, an inanimate object, or you know it could be a tree, whatever. But being able to really hear what someone else would say to you when you're struggling and offer that to yourself and then, as that becomes more comfortable, then making it really come from you, from your heart.
Speaker 1:Yeah, starting from like a foundation of kindness and compassion and then going. It's not that you have to accept like the weight that you're at or the I mean right, we don't have to like necessarily accept these things. But if we come at it from this kind and compassionate angle and then look to maybe lose weight or get in better shape or whatever the goal is, it's just a much better experience. I mean, it's just a much nicer experience.
Speaker 2:Right, right, well, and I think I think too, for some people that they see self-kindness is like a, like a panacea, right, oh, everything's fine, you're good, no worries, and it's not that right. It's like it feels really hard that I broke my diet or that I'm not at the weight I want to be. And can I be with how hard that is and offer myself compassion around that? Like this feels really hard, that I'm 10 pounds or whatever it is that I'm heavier than I want to be. But can I recognize that I'm not alone in this, that I have the choice of how I talk to myself around how hard it is? Like I could be terrible and tell myself how awful I am for not sticking to this diet, or I could say, gosh, that was really. It's so hard to stay with this diet and it feels really hard that I'm not where I want to be.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Losing weight is hard. It is. It's challenging. It's challenging when we're in midlife, where it can get hard, but let's keep going.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, and if and, and maybe through the self-kindness, there's a weight that you can find that works, that maybe isn't as severe or drastic, you know that can be a place that you can find comfort in and be okay with some acceptance around, like for me that's been a challenge in midlife. You know that. That, yeah, my body is definitely a different shape and I and the weight I was probably 10 years ago, I've I've gained weight, but I recognize to, to, to nourish my body in the way I want to like to feed it so that I get the nutrition I need, but also the enjoyment that I I love food, so to get the enjoyment, like all right. So I'm going to buy some clothes that fit me comfortably now and I'm okay with that. But yeah, but that took some time to get there.
Speaker 1:Right, being okay where you are right now and then if you lose weight, great, I mean right. Besides the, you know having the self-compassion and the bone, you know, I mean the self-compassion and kindness um, I was thinking about boundaries, oh, yeah, also. Yeah, which I know is, you know, a big one for a lot of women. You know, saying yes when you mean to say no, that's's been something for me, at least, that I have been, has definitely been top of mind for the last couple of years is, you know, no is a complete sentence and being really okay with that. And you know what, what do you do? You think that that's a that's a big one for women in midlife?
Speaker 2:I do. I think that boundaries are a struggle for women in general. I think we are raised to be people pleasers and be the caregivers and take care of others before we take care of our own needs. And you know society needs that and we also can do that, you know, do our caregiving and take care of ourselves too. And so that does mean setting boundaries and saying no.
Speaker 2:I think what is very hard for many women, especially I am highly sensitive so especially for highly sensitive women is we're so concerned about hurting other people's feelings. We're so worried about how others will feel if I say no. What will happen to that relationship if I set this boundary? And a lot of the work that I do with clients is like allowing them to see that they're sort of twisting to accommodate others really harms themselves and the relationship, because then the people in their lives come to expect this sort of selfless energy and you end up feeling depleted, resentful. Yeah, the relationship doesn't feel uh reciprocal anymore. And so I do see like helping women find a way to create boundaries that work for them because it's not the same for everybody but also recognizing sometimes, when we begin this process of creating healthier boundaries for ourselves, sometimes some relationships do fall away and that's really hard and sometimes it's necessary.
Speaker 1:What do you think is behind the lack of boundaries or saying yes when you want to say no? I mean, where does that? Does that come from? Something from our past? Is it just we're just born caretakers and I mean I know that you've, I'm sure for a lot of women they feel very useful or needed or wanted. Yeah, but it is, yeah. I mean that's just the opposite sometimes of self-care. Where do you think that stems from? So women can understand this. So I think it's important to know where the origins of it are right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, I think there is a big cultural message, at least for women of our generation, Like there's a cultural message around sort of selflessness as being the ideal for women, like you are the giver, you're the caretaker, you are the selfless person. And I think religion has something to do with that too. Right, being selfless, helpful people and being helpful in a caregiver and you know, selfless at times can be lovely, but if we're constantly taking care of other people's needs to the detriment of our own, we end up well, oftentimes sick. You know it can result in oftentimes sick. You know it can result in, like physical illness because we're not taking care of both our physical and our emotional needs. And so it benefits everybody if we're setting boundaries because one we're in a better place to take care of the people in our lives that need taking care.
Speaker 2:You know, because we like to take care of people, most women, I think you know that that tends that may be a genetic component, a component of who we are, but but for a lot of people, like if we're you know, my mom used to always talk about burning the candle at both ends, right Like if we're just using up all the energy on everybody else, there's nothing left for us, and so then we're not doing whatever caregiving we might want to do. Coming from a place from our heart right. It's coming out of obligation or resentment, or even anger.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean you have to be good with yourself first. I mean physically, mentally, right, rested all the self-care things before you can take care of others.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Right, and I think that's where the boundaries come in. And some women can, I guess can think that it feels very selfish, but it's really self-care.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, and I think that sort of that idea that taking care of yourself is selfish, like I don't know. There were times in my life where I would get so angry at my husband because it was so easy for him just to be like, well, I'm going to go whatever play golf or whatever, it was right, I'm going to go hang out with my friends, and I'd be like how do you just like do that without worrying about what everybody else is thinking?
Speaker 2:I'm like wow what a great place to be right, where I can, not to hurt other people, but to just say this is what I need right now, and so yes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it feels so foreign?
Speaker 2:It does, it does and it takes practice. I mean, that's the other thing, is it, you know, to be better at holding your boundaries? It takes practice putting them in place, and sometimes we're good at it and sometimes we're not, and having compassion with ourselves when we say yes to something we really didn't want to do, you know, and say whoops, you know it's not my best moment, but next time I will learn from this and be better. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I think any other keys I mean I think we talked about boundaries, self-care, compassion, kindness, yeah, so we talk about just you know the just changes going on in midlife. Any other key, you know? Takeaways for women in midlife, just to you know, I think these are all like good talking points. You know takeaways for women in midlife, just to you know, I think these are all like good talking points, you know, or just all like these kind of buzzwords to focus on.
Speaker 2:What else do you see and anything else that's we didn't cover the one thing I like to share with clients too, or just you know, to live it's like change is possible for us, no matter where we are in our life, right, no matter what age or stage. We have an opportunity to make changes if we choose to and also, obviously, if we have the resources to do that. But even that change can be internal change, right, it doesn't have to be physical, like I don't necessarily mean you can move or change careers, but you can shift how you relate to yourself and how you relate to others. At any time in your life those changes are possible.
Speaker 1:That's very good wise words, maybe to add. So I mean I think that's yeah, I mean change is possible. We're not stuck where we are. Even if we might be in a job that we can't just leave, or a physical location, geographic location, we have the power right in us to even just internally make changes. Yeah, and that's really important, biz, thank you very much. I wanted to just share with my audience how do they get in touch with you if they want to reach out and maybe do some more work with you.
Speaker 2:Perfect. So I am a therapist that's licensed in Maryland and Delaware and my website for that is progressioncounselingcom, so you can find me there. But I am also, like I said, a life coach Coach feels like an awfully strong word, but a guide, a mentor for highly sensitive women, and you can find that at elizabethcushcom, and Cush is spelled with a C. Often AI just turns my last name into K-U-S-H, but it's not. But yeah, you can find me in both places. I don't know when this episode will air, but I just began offering sort of a meetup for highly sensitive women at a very moderate price. We'll meet virtually March 14th, eastern Time 1215. And that's open right now for registration, if people are interested and if this goes live. After that I'm going to be offering those more often and you can get on my mailing list and find out more.
Speaker 1:Okay, great, so this is an ongoing meeting. It will be, yes, okay, but you're starting March 14th, okay, great. Let me just ask you before we end I know you've mentioned highly sensitive people or highly sensitive women. Just give me a sentence about that. How do you define someone who's highly sensitive?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so being highly sensitive is actually like a genetic trait. It is something we're born with and so we. As a highly sensitive person, you take in sensory information at a sort of a deeper level than the average person. So it could be. You know so. Through your five senses you may smell things more distinctly. Bad odors may impact you more powerfully.
Speaker 2:Hearing like sound could be. If you're in a really loud place, that can be overwhelming. Bright lights, lots of colors, lots of people. As highly sensitive women, you may find that you get overwhelmed by environmental stimulus more easily than the average person you may have heard growing up. You're just too sensitive. You need to get over it. You feel too much. You shouldn't feel so much, yeah, so if you can recall hearing those things as a kid, you can go to. I think it's called, I think the website is hspersoncom. Elaine Aron is the one who's done a lot of the research. But there's like a little self-quiz that you can take that highlights the points where you know it identifies whether you're highly sensitive or not, and you know it shows up differently for each person. You know what you're more sensitive to. But it's another area where, if we can find compassion for our sensitivities. It helps us live in the world in a much more easeful way.
Speaker 1:Right, Okay, so having acceptance. So, for example, if my husband is chewing something crunchy and that drives me crazy yes, I'm just kind of making a joke, but I know I mean cause I, some of those things can drive me really crazy and I think I'm highly sensitive to things like that but yeah, no, I understand that highly. Yeah, the highly sensitive traits. So that's good to understand. I'm glad I asked you that right at the slip, that in before we ended. So, Biz, thank you so much. This was a great conversation and I think my audience will have a lot to work with.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I just want to say too, I have a podcast as well. It's the Awaken your Wise Woman podcast. People can find me there and on Instagram at Awaken your Wise Woman. So there you go, all the pieces.
Speaker 1:I will put all of those links in the show notes so people can get that all through there. Okay, great, thanks so much.
Speaker 2:Thanks.