Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (01:10)
It's sad, but it's fascinating because it's data. I love data because that tells you that a lot of people, what is your unsafe environment? Know what your unsafe environment is. So for them to be aware that yes, darkness or not being able to see what's in front of me, whatever the reason is, that's a huge awareness that they have and that's amazing.
Katie Wrigley (01:13)
Yeah.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (01:36)
And yeah, like if you are one of those, like 100 % just focus on an object. And it just, the reason we want you to focus is because then your brain can't think about other things while you're trying to focus on your heart and your breath.
Katie Wrigley (01:50)
Yep. Yeah. As you're going in there and rounding it up. And then the thing that I used to do when I was trying to get into breath work was from Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now. And so my brain would still be racing and I'd still have the shallow breaths and trying to get my, come on, belly engaged. And it feels so hard to engage when you're up here. And my brain would still be racing, racing, racing. And the thing that he had mentioned to do is to say, ask yourself, what's my next thought?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (02:05)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Katie Wrigley (02:20)
they'll use this if my brain starts to jumble a whole bunch of ideas. I'm like, what's my next thought? Because now your brain's like, what is my next thought? Instead of coming up with it, it's like, what is it?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (02:24)
Yeah.
Yeah.
A
really cool technique that I learned through an ancient study to ground yourself humming. Hum your favorite song because your brain has to think about the words that you're humming and it shuts your brain down. It's fascinating. Yeah. Yeah, it's so cool.
Katie Wrigley (02:41)
Mmm.
I love that. I'm going to try that the next time my brain wants to go squirrely on me. Like I can pull it back in seconds, but I like to
vary it up.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (02:59)
Let's say you're driving and you're starting to feel overwhelmed and you can't put your hand on your belly and your heart or whatever. If you hum, like turn everything off, turn radio off, if you start humming out loud your favorite song, it shuts the thoughts off because your brain can't do both. Yeah.
Katie Wrigley (03:19)
Nice. that's so cool.
I'm going to definitely try that. That sounds fun, actually. ⁓
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (03:24)
So if you see us humming in public, just give us a moment.
Katie Wrigley (03:26)
We'll be right with you. Sometimes it's
like, how much can I relax myself or how enjoyable is this? Sometimes I'll just try it even if I'm not feeling well enough. like, I heard about that. Let's give it a go. Yeah, yeah, we do. There was someone had sent it. I don't remember who it was. was someone on Instagram and they sent me the message through Facebook.
But the guy was showing like this technique to basically like stick your fist into your, no, I was under the left armpit. Stick your fist into your left armpit and hug yourself. like, yeah, and it like, as soon as you start doing that along with the hug, it's like your body just goes, Like even when you're like, I'm not even tense right now, but even just doing that, I'm like, I immediately feel it.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (03:58)
Yeah.
There's a pressure point there.
Yeah.
Yeah, well lot of that's like somatic stuff like for individuals that like don't or that are okay with closing their eyes putting like their palms on their eyelids and like pressing it like keeping your eyes closed and pressing kind of a little pressure on your eyes like there's something to do with that and the connection with your conscious mind where it just shuts it down. It's so cool.
Katie Wrigley (04:40)
Yeah, that makes sense.
that is cool. Thank you. I'll try that one too. We're coming up with them today, aren't we, Hayley? So what are some of the signs that are more hidden around burnout that a lot of high achieving professionals come across?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (04:45)
Lots of tips and tricks.
I think the biggest one that most of my clients didn't recognize at first was their stomach. The flutters. I know it's a podcast, like bowel movements. If your bowel movements are off, like if you are constantly full all the time and you are hungry, but you're still so full, like any sort of
gut health, certain foods that are bothering you now, acid reflux, GERD, like all those things to do with stomach issues. That like people just kind of brush off stomach issues. And to me, that was my, one of my first biggest indicators was like, if I'm stressed, my stomach's just like instantly shot for like a day and.
But a lot of my clients were like, I didn't even think about that. Yeah, last week my stomach did this or yeah, I can't have that food today or, you know, it's fascinating. So that is the biggest thing. Another big thing is not being able to finish sentences.
Katie Wrigley (06:00)
Mmm. Ooh. That's a good one. Yeah.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (06:02)
Right? Like, you
just cognitively, like, can't get it out. You just can't finish a sentence. And there's few reasons why, whether you're in fight, flight, or freeze. But a lot of the time it's because you just can't... Your brain is spiraling so much you might not even notice it because that could be your norm. But you genuinely, like, can't...
Katie Wrigley (06:24)
Mm-hmm.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (06:27)
finish the sentences or you can't hold that conversation properly without being like spotty and yeah, it's weird.
Katie Wrigley (06:35)
Yeah, you you just totally triggered a memory for me, Hailey, when I was still in corporate, well, like 10 years, actually more than 10 years before I started to do this. When was this the time? It was a long time ago. Anyway, I, was one of the times when I was pausing on drinking for a while. And I think I was like 30 days into it or something. And every single time I talked, I lost what I was saying.
And I was doing training. I was getting sent all over the world at that point in time to give training in foreign countries. And I'm like,
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (07:04)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, you lose your train of thought and you just like can't get it out.
Katie Wrigley (07:13)
Totally gone. And
I had never actually, I know that that had happened, but I had never actually been like, of course my stress went, and not that drinking is the best way for stress relief, but it was providing something to my nervous system to offload that stress. it was, it was.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (07:27)
It was your norm at the time. You remove
that norm and now your system's like, what the heck?
Katie Wrigley (07:35)
Right, right.
Yeah, it didn't know what to do. And now I haven't had a drink since 2018. So it'll be eight years in July. And my nervous system wouldn't even know what to do with alcohol at this point. And like, I don't need it. I don't want it like more power to you. If you enjoy your drinks have at it. But for me, like with my addictive personality, it just wasn't the best wasn't the best thing for me to keep doing but
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (07:42)
Awesome.
Yeah.
Katie Wrigley (08:02)
Yeah, you're right. was the stress level went up because I took away one of my stress reducers. And since I wasn't aware at the time, I didn't substitute it with anything that was going to be healthy to get that stress level back down. I just kept going.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (08:08)
that.
Cause yeah, and I want to talk about that quickly before we wrap up. Like I know a lot of my clients are like, well, I've been in this situation for so long and now I'm choosing healthy situation and my nervous system is shot. Because whatever your norm is, whether it's cruel and toxic, if that's your norm for X amount of time, that's what your nervous system is used to. So now you're like,
⁓ on the opposite side, now I want to be healthy. I want to surround myself with awesome people and healthy support. Your nervous system is going to be shocked. And you still will, even though you're making healthy choices and a positive change, because your nervous system isn't used to that yet, it's going to react and tell you all the alarms and say, this isn't good. I don't like this. I don't like this. And that's why a lot of people go back.
to their unhealthy relationships or ways because they're like, but this is more calm. But it's only because your nervous system is used to that chaos. So give it time, give it time.
Katie Wrigley (09:19)
Yes.
Yep.
You have the familiar hell over the unfamiliar heaven.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (09:31)
Ugh, I like that.
Katie Wrigley (09:33)
Yeah, that's I saw it on Instagram. I went to go try to find who the originator of that quote was. And I wasn't able to find it when I was doing research around my book. But I have a friend that's going through that right now is she has all these positive changes in her nervous system just went like totally wigged out on her over the weekend. Yeah. And she's like, I know this is good. I know this is good. She's like,
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (09:49)
Yes. What is happening to me?
Katie Wrigley (09:55)
But when you've had trauma and this much change, I'm like, yeah, your nervous system is choosing that familiar hell over the unfamiliar heaven. You're teaching it right now that it's going to want to go towards the heaven, but right now it's going, oh my God, what are you doing? You're giving us comfort. We don't know what to do with that. It does.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (10:09)
Yeah.
It takes a while. So if you're
listening to this, give yourself, I want to say at least a month. Like behavior change is at least 21 days. At least. Where you start feeling a bit better. So, time.
Katie Wrigley (10:23)
Yes.
Yeah, I agree
with that. Yeah, even the modality I use, can make changes quicker, but the nervous system still isn't going to move to that new pattern until it feels safe. And it takes a little time and repetition, like you were saying, to continue doing those things for the nervous system to be like, okay, I can get on with this now.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (10:49)
Yeah, because we have to,
that's part of the cognitive behavioral training that I took was we need to teach our brain and our nervous system new pathways and that takes time. And so there's different strategies you can do to actually change the way the neurons flow and the new pathways it's going to create. It's so cool, ⁓ but it takes time and it can be done.
Katie Wrigley (11:01)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah. ⁓
100%. Yeah, that little thing called neuroplasticity, which is our brain's ability to adapt to different environments as the environments keep changing. If the brain can change negatively, it can also change positively based on the positive input that you were giving it. And it does take time to build those up.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (11:30)
Yep.
Katie Wrigley (11:37)
I like to give the analogy of like two paths in the forest, like one super well worn and we just don't want to go on that path anymore because now maybe there's a mountain lion down that path and it's just not safe anymore. So we want to go this way and it's going to take a while until that path is as well worn as the one with the mountain lion.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (11:53)
Yes, I like that. Just gotta keep keep pushing through those bushes.
Katie Wrigley (11:59)
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And
sometimes it's a little easier if you got some machinery to like plow it down a little quicker, but it's a process for everybody and everyone's nervous system goes at a different speed. Like you mentioned initially that we're all so unique and these signs of burnout, these signs of stress can sneak up on us in different ways and it looks different for each person. The healing journey is going to look different for each person too because you're a unique person.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (12:13)
huh.
Katie Wrigley (12:26)
and your nervous system isn't going to let go until it feels safe to do so.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (12:27)
Yeah.
And your nervous system is biologically unique to you. And that's why it's like you can't have a one stop program where you can like put every one of your clients into this program. It's a unique program that has to be done by the basis of your biology and your trauma and what you're willing to do in order to move through that.
Katie Wrigley (12:58)
Yes, and that last thing, what you're willing to do. Like that is a big piece of it too. Like we, you can have a lot of the tools and they're only gonna work if you use them, which is your willingness and your willingness to do the more, the more you're willing to do it, the faster you're gonna move through it. That kinda rhymed. Like that just kinda came up. So ⁓ I love this conversation, Hailey. So how can people work with you?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (13:01)
Okay.
I like it. I know, I like it.
have two options and like I said, everyone's so unique. So I have a one-off option where you and I do a private call and I can teach you tools and tricks and help you get to the bottom of some of your stressors or traumas. With my psychic ability, I can help you with past, present or future to help you really dive deep into what the source is that's causing this for you.
If you are needing more of a deeper dive into working through the situation at hand, I offer a 12 week private coaching option. So that means you and I talk on video or phone once a week, but then you also get me on text on a 24 seven chat. So private chats. So you and I work together because, and the reason I offer the private chat is because
you could be having the best day and then someone texts you and we don't have a call till Monday and it's Thursday night and you get triggered, I want you to text me so I can work through that in the moment because that's how you heal. We don't heal by talking about the trigger in a week from now. We heal by working through it in the moment and so that is my signature offer right now is the 24-7 chat because we have to work through it.
in the moment, get you feeling grounded again, talk about it, release it, and move forward. And I, like, this is kind of controversial, but like, regular therapy doesn't heal like that. We cannot go to our therapist once a week and be like, just brain dump everything, and then be like, okay, great, thanks. We need in the moment, and that is how I've healed over 150 clients from around the world.
by doing that shot.
Katie Wrigley (15:23)
Nice. Yeah. And that's a big difference because life continues to happen. I love that you're able to create that space for clients to meet you in the moment when they need you and have that. And you'd actually reminded me, I wanted to dive more into like the psychic ability, the intuitive piece. And what have you noticed as far as your own intuition, your own psychic abilities, how have those opened up as you've been living with this now regulated nervous system that you're teaching others to do?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (15:51)
I mean, no one's perfect. I had a little moment a couple weeks ago where I wasn't actively doing my stuff, my regulation stuff. yeah, my psychic ability was very clouded. So it's very important to actively work on self, even for the healers and the ones doing it. I've been doing it for seven plus years and I still forget.
Sometimes if I'm busy, right? So actively working on your regulation tools, being in tune constantly with yourself ⁓ every single day because my psychic ability is, I mean, it's a gift. It's in my family. My family's all from England and Ireland and a lot of our family members have that gift, which is incredible.
And I like to use it to help others in terms of understanding past situations or present or even future situations where I can help, ⁓ I guess, steer them in different directions in terms of if you do this, this may happen. And this is what we see. So it's free will, willpower, right? But again, yeah, like being in tune with myself, actively practicing my own craft.
and actively practicing my own psychic abilities by doing different readings on people and focusing on my own gift is what truly helps heal the others in terms of what they can and can't see, right?
Katie Wrigley (17:23)
Yeah, I love that. And I think all of us are born with those gifts. It's just do we come from a family and a belief system that talks about it? Like your family clearly talks about the fact that we all have this within us. My family doesn't acknowledge any of that stuff. But I've also seen too many examples of both within my own life and other people's lives. Like we always get that knowing. And that's your intuition. That's your psychic gift there.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (17:39)
Yeah.
Yep.
Katie Wrigley (17:51)
It's we just get trained away from it as we become older and less again, we've got a belief system or family that's really embraced that part of the human experience and continues to keep that alive and encourages those gifts. But I believe that not to the same extent, like, you know, some people are going to be really, really tapped in and blow your mind and others like they may not have cultivated the skill that much. But
I think everybody has that ability to do it. And I love that you pull that into your work as well, Hailey, and help give that intuitive, that gut feeling that, yes, this is where we need to go. And here's what I see may be coming. And here are the choices of what you can do with it. And it's always your choice. What do you want to do with this?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (18:37)
Yeah.
The majority of my clients like to utilize my gift to understand the person that has abused them or like truly understand them at their core. Like why did they do this? Maybe it from a childhood, when did they do this? What did that, what actually happened to me? Why am I triggered as an adult? I'm able to tune in and tell them the scene and the scenario and
Katie Wrigley (18:51)
Mm.
Mm-hmm.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (19:08)
what actually happened and who it was by and or in the future if for example if that person wants to go this route like what do you see like foresee happening like is that something that I should explore another part is like yeah the relationship part if I talk to my partner about this why would their reaction be like this so I can tune in to those people
Psychically and I truly understand and give that person the understanding and clarity that they need in order to move forward with that
Katie Wrigley (19:42)
I love that. That's definitely another layer that most people don't get coached. love that you're doing that. ⁓ Where can people find you, Hailey, so they can connect with you?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (19:46)
Uh-huh.
I'm driving everyone to my landing page. There's a little form you can fill out or a live chat. The form is just your name, number and email and a little note saying why you want to tune in to me and connect with me. It comes directly to me so I'll privately message you and we can dive into a free clarity call and just really see how I can support you. It's at www.hayley-kohlmann.com
Or you can find me on Instagram at live.empower
Katie Wrigley (20:27)
Awesome, thank you. And we'll make sure that those are included in the show notes so that people can reach out to you directly. If they're loving what you're saying, as much as I'm loving what you're saying, want to make sure you guys reach out to Hailey and get the help that you need to get that nervous system regulated, help tap into some of her abilities as the intuitive, the psychic that she is. And also she's clearly shown she's learned a lot about this from her own lived experience.
Is there any last thing that you would want to leave the listener with today, Hayley, who may be struggling and feeling anxious or feeling physical pain or all of the above? Like, what's case with me?
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (21:05)
Reach out because every one of my clients said that they were struggling and tried all the things until they reached out to somebody who could actually teach them. If it's an investment in yourself, do it. I do offer free calls to give you a couple tips and tricks. But reach out because I know with
Katie Wrigley (21:17)
Yes.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (21:33)
like data shows with all of my clients around the world, they tried everything on their own. They came to me as a last resort. They tried all the things, medications, strategies, tools, different styles of therapies, different holistic tools and therapies. Like they tried so many things until they were like, you know what, I'm not healing at a soul level.
Katie Wrigley (21:39)
Mm-hmm.
Hailey - The psychic nervous system coach (21:57)
This is just all surface level stuff and I'm still struggling and that is why all my clients came to me. So if you're at that level and you feel like, I've tried everything, reach out, find someone who can actually teach you nervous system regulation.
Katie Wrigley (22:15)
Amen to that. Thank you. Thank you for wrapping. That is beautiful. I'm going to pause there. And thank you, listener, for joining us today and spending time with Hailey and I. And until next time, please be well.
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