Welcome to Create the Best Me. I am Carmen Hecox, a personal development coach, and I am so excited to be connecting with you today. Whether you're listening to the podcast or joining us on YouTube, my goal is to help women navigate through midlife challenges with compassion, inspiration, and empowering conversations.
Each week we'll dive into thought-provoking topics, designed to build self-confidence, overcome invisible women's syndrome, and find the courage to create the best version of yourself.
I'll also be joined by expert guests who will share their wisdom and insights, so make yourself comfortable and let's embark on this journey together.
Can I ask you a question? Have you ever felt like you're suddenly questioning everything you once thought you knew about yourself? Well, you're not alone, and there's actually a name for it. So, stick around because we're about to dive into the midlife identity shift and what you can do about it.
Welcome back to Create The Best Me, or if you are new here, hello! I'm Carmen Hecox, your host and personal development coach, where we encourage and empower women in midlife to pursue their dreams and live life to the fullest.
Today, we're focusing on midlife identity shift that women often experience. But this isn't something to fear, it's a time of rediscovery and growth. So, let's break it down.
Alright, let's get down to the heart of the matter: What exactly is a midlife identity shift that we're talking about?
You know, when you're trying to solve a puzzle and you think you figured it out, but then you realize there's one piece that doesn't quite fit? Suddenly, you're back to square one, rearranging, reassessing, and reconsidering each piece. That's a lot like midlife identity shift.
Imagine this puzzle as your life: Your job, your family, your hobbies, your ambitions, even your favorite coffee order. You've worked hard to put all these pieces of the puzzle together over years, decades, even. But then, somewhere around midlife, you find yourself staring at the finished puzzle and thinking, “Does this picture still represent me?”
This is when you start questioning things. Things that were once familiar and comforting, things that you always believe are true, the roles you played, the mask you've worn. It's about, realizing that what used to fulfill you in your twenties and thirties may not hold the same value or give you the same sense of satisfaction in your forties, fifties, and beyond.
But here's the key takeaway: This shift isn't something to dread or fear. It's normal, albeit confusing part of life. And guess what? It's also an incredible opportunity for growth and rediscovery and the creation of a life that truly reflects the person you are now. So, are you ready to dive into the next piece of the puzzle? Because, believe me, it's a journey worth embarking on.
Now that we have a better understanding of what a midlife identity shift is, it's time to dive into the million-dollar question. Why does it happen?
Picture this: You're sitting on a park bench, and you notice a tree. You've seen this tree every day, but today, you suddenly realize how much it's grown. The branches have expanded, the roots have gone deeper, and it's not the same little Charlie Brown Christmas tree it once was. This is very much like us, like you. As we navigate life, we're constantly growing, expanding our branches in different directions. We learn, we experience, we adapt, and naturally we change. We're not the same person we were ten years ago, or even a year ago, and that's absolutely normal.
The transformation often becomes more apparent and introspective during the mid-years. This is a stage when many of us have seen our own children grow up, our careers reach a certain milestone, and some of the roles we played in our younger year shift. It's almost like it's presenting us with a pause button, asking us to take a moment and check in with ourselves.
Do we still love the things we used to love? Do the roles we've played still fulfill us? Do the values we once held still ring true? It's a period of time where the focus often moves from the external and internal, from doing and being. It's a period of life where the focus often moves from the external to internal, from doing to being, and this is why this shift happens. It's an evolutionary process that nudges us to turn inward, to reflect, to reassess, to rediscover who we truly are, beyond those roles, beyond the expectations and beyond the external definitions.
Now, before we delve deeper, if you're enjoying this video and want to join the journey of self-discovering transformation, don't forget to hit the subscribe button. Together, we can navigate the changes that life brings one step at a time.
Moving along our journey. It's important to acknowledge that change, as exciting as it can be, often comes with a fair share of challenges. Picture this as a sea voyage. We've set our sail toward the horizon, but the sea isn't always calm, is it?
The waves represent the challenge that comes with midlife identity shift. It might feel as if though you're suddenly stepping into unfamiliar territory, almost as if you've woken up in a foreign land without a map. You might feel lost, uncertain, maybe even a little scared, and that's okay.
Perhaps you're questioning your decisions you've made in the past or feeling a sense of restlessness or dissatisfaction with things that once made you content. You may be grappling with the sense of loss, the loss of youth, the loss of certain roles, the loss of what was familiar and comfortable.
Change can sometimes feel like you're standing at the edge of the cliff, uncertain of what lies below. But remember, it's through facing these challenges that we find our wings. It's through these trials and tribulations that we learn more about ourselves, our desires, and our strengths.
So yes, the sea may be rough sometimes, but don't forget that each wave brings an opportunity for growth, for understanding and for rediscovery. And the best part? You're not alone on this voyage. We're sailing together, and it's okay to reach out and ask for help when you need it.
As we move into the next segment, remember, every challenge is a stepping stone toward understanding your new identity better. So, let's discover some actionable steps that you can take on this journey toward self-discovery.
Just like every good captain needs a compass to navigate through the rough seas, we too need actionable steps to guide us through this journey of self-discovery. Let's think about this segment as your personal compass, the guiding light on your journey.
First and foremost, embrace the change. I want you to think of it like this: Remember the first time you moved into your new home? At first everything felt unfamiliar. There was a certain sense of unease, right? But as the days passed, you started settling in. You rearranged the furniture, found the perfect spot for your favorite painting, and slowly and surely this new place started to feel like home. Embracing change is very much like that. It can be daunting initially, but as you start to accept it and work with it, you'll find it can be just as exciting and invigorating.
Secondly, reflect on what's important to you now. I want you to imagine a garden. This garden is your life, and the plants are the various parts of it. Your job, your hobbies, your relationship. As you grow older, you might notice some plants need more attention, some have outgrown their pots while others no longer bring you joy as they used to. This is your chance to reassess your garden. Do you need new plants? Do the old ones need to be repotted or pruned? Take time to evaluate your values and goals and passion.
Next, don't hesitate to seek help. This is as important as the lighthouse to the ship on a dark night. Seek guidance from a life coach, a therapist. Join support groups, read self-help books, or simply have a heart-to-heart conversation with your friends and family. Remember, every lighthouse, every beacon is there to help you navigate your journey more effectively.
Last, take care of your physical health. Remember, a strong ship can weather through the roughest storms. Exercise, a balanced diet and adequate sleep can significantly impact your overall well-being and mood. It's the base on which you can build your new foundation, self-understanding and personal growth.
As we sail toward the final segment, I want you to keep these actionable steps in mind. With them, you have your compass, your map, and your lighthouse. Now let's head over to the horizon and discover the silver lining of midlife identity shift.
As our journey reaches its zenith, let's bask on the glow of the silver lining that this midlife identity shift brings. Because, believe me, it's not just about the rough waves and the changing winds; it's also about the glorious sunrise after the stormy night.
Remember that new home we spoke about? Once you've settled in, once you've made it your own, there's a sense of joy and fulfillment in seeing what you created, isn't there? That's exactly what we're talking about here.
The midlife identity shift, despite its challenges, can be incredibly empowering and liberating period. Just think about this - You now have the freedom to rediscover yourself, to rewrite your story the way you want to be.
This is a time when you can explore new paths, paths you might not have even had the chance or the courage to walk on before. Maybe you've always wanted to learn how to paint, or perhaps you've been dreaming of starting your own business. This is your time to make those dreams a reality.
It's an important opportunity to build new relationships or strengthen existing ones. As you discover more about yourself, you're likely to form deeper and more meaningful connections with people who resonate with your evolved self.
It's not just about rediscovering yourself, but it's also about embracing your evolving identity and truly living your life to the fullest. Remember, the journey doesn't end where the storm passes. That's when the real adventure begins.
As we conclude this voyage of self-discovery and transformation, remember, you’re the captain of the ship, and the horizon is yours to explore. Let's carry these insights with us as we sail through our concluding thoughts.
As we anchor our ship at the end of this enlightening voyage, let's take a moment to reflect on the horizon we've traversed today.
We began our journey by understanding what a midlife identity shift is. Like rearranging a puzzle, we discovered it's a period in our lives when we start to reassess everything, we thought we knew about ourselves and our lives.
From there, we delved into the depths of why this shift occurs. Just like a growing tree, we've learned that we are collecting experiences and wisdom over time, we naturally change and evolve leading to a period of introspection and self-discovery.
Navigating through the choppy waves, we acknowledge the challenges of this shift. It can be disorienting and daunting, but remember, it's through the waves we learn to surf.
Armed with our compass of actionable steps, we learned how to embrace this shift. From accepting challenges to re-evaluating our lives, seeking help, and prioritizing physical health, these are the guiding lights to help us through our journey.
And finally, we basked in the glow of the silver lining this shift brings. An empowering period of self-discovery, exploration, and personal growth that allows us to truly live our life to the fullest.
So, as we close for today, remember that a midlife identity shift is not a crisis, but a transformation. It's an adventure where the familiar paths gives way to explore trails, and you're the adventurer, ready to discover new vistas.
Don't forget to tune in next week for an encouraging episode, featuring an award-winning author, psychologist, coach, leadership consultant, and master transformational teacher, Suzanne Anderson.
We will be discussing her new book "You Make Your Path By Walking", which I've personally have read thanks to Suzanne. And you need to read it too. You can pre-order your book now at all major book retailers and begin reading this amazing book by June 13th, 2023.
Thank you for joining us on this journey. Don't forget to hit the subscribe button and keep these conversations going. Until next time, keep dreaming big, take care of yourself, and remember, you are beautiful, strong, and capable of creating the best version of yourself. Thank you for watching, catch you next time, bye for now!
