Shed the "weight" of food-related fears as Heidi and Christina share a feast of wisdom on tackling the anxiety of weight gain from a single meal. We peel back the layers of dieting's illusion of control, revealing thinking with the "mind of Christ" (1 Corinthians 2:16) can cultivate a serene relationship with food and eating.
Feeling guilty after an indulgent meal is all too common, but we're here to flip that script. We discuss the transformative 'look and learn' method, a guilt-free way to learn from our lapses in eating discipline. By challenging the stronghold of overeating with a hearty portion of Mind Renewal and God's unwavering truth, we present an alternative narrative where being 'triggered' doesn't mean defeat. Discover the liberating concept of 'Spirit-Led Eating' and how keeping in rhythm with the Spirit of God can lead to a balanced and joyful approach to mealtime.
We invite you to join us in celebrating food freedom, where portion awareness and understanding the deeper motivations behind our choices take precedence over fear. Through our conversation, we hope to inspire you to confidently say "no thank you" to judgment and "yes" to a lifestyle of well-being that honors your body and spirit. So, let's break bread together and feast without fear..
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Speaker 1:
Hi and welcome to Revelation Within on the Go. I'm Heidi Baalsma-Epperson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of the Revelation Within ministry.
Speaker 2:
And I'm Christina Motley, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within. We're so glad to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within on the Go.
Speaker 1:
Go, go, go Go. Where are we going today, heidi? Yeah where are we going? How about we want to learn to feast without fear?
Speaker 2:
Oh, I love that idea Feast without fear, more careful.
Speaker 1:
Or maybe if it's not feast, it's eat a little bit without fear, I don't know. Just right-sized portion.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, a feast that is involving peaceful eating. There you go, there you go.
Speaker 1:
So we thought that we would look at what are some common fears that many of us might have about food, about eating, and then talk about what are God's thoughts about that. Because you know, that's what we're about. We're about renewing our minds, simply enough. That's just thinking God's thoughts about things, telling myself what is true from God's perspective, and then, as I tell myself that, more and more I will begin to believe it and as I believe it, my actions will change. So, if I have fears around food that cause me to behave a certain way, telling myself God's thoughts about those foods and those fears can actually impact the way I relate to that food, which is a lovely truth. We don't have to be stuck.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and it's something that Heidi and I have both experienced again and again, and again and again, all right.
Speaker 1:
So one of the things that has struck me and I told Christina this has been kind of odd to me for decades, really, even when I was a dieter, and that is this idea that after one meal that I ate too much or that another person ate too much, they could be afraid of gaining weight and if they get on the scale the next morning, they're convinced that that reflects the accuracy of whether they've gained or lost weight because of the meal the night before, when really, as far as time goes, it takes a little longer than that for weight to show up on my body. What do you think God's thoughts are about that idea that I can't eat that, or I eat that and I'm going to gain a bunch of weight tomorrow morning when I weigh. It's going to be all so bad.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I think it comes from all the pressures in our society, all the dieting mentality, all the things that so many of us have been told for years and years and years. I mean that was absolutely a belief of mine that I would eat this kind of food and this much of it, and the next day it would show up on the scale and I was very much obsessed with the scale in a very unhealthy way. So in some ways it was a way for me to control. You know, our bodies are so complex. I wouldn't even say that I understand how it all works when we eat and how long it takes and what happens to the food inside of our bodies.
Speaker 2:
I mean, I've taken the classes, you know but, it's like our bodies are complicated, fearfully and wonderfully, but I think that, in the world of dieting, making it simple makes us feel like we're more in control Well, if I have this instead of this? Or oh well if I have all of this and we simplify the processes that our body goes through and I think for me it was control.
Speaker 1:
What do you think, heidi? I think that's probably the case for a lot of people. So, if we're going to address these fears and reassure the listeners and reassure ourselves about God's grace in our eating journey, what can we speak to ourselves about this fear specifically? What is a statement that might work? A very specific, like what is true statement, a mind renewal statement, or two or three, even about can I gain weight from one meal?
Speaker 2:
Thank you, I don't think you can, can you?
Speaker 1:
I don't think you can. It seems as though it would take a long period of time of eating a certain way to really actually have it show up as physical fat on your body. And here's the thing, I guess, if we were going to strip all this aside and look at what is my focus, if I'm afraid of gaining weight from one meal, am I repentant of my gluttony? No, I'm more repentant that I ate in a way that I think is going to make me heavier.
Speaker 2:
I was talking with someone the other day about this topic of you know what felt like such a horrible, horrible thing to have overeaten in one meal. And we were talking about it and she asked me to share with her how I use look and learn when something like that happens. And so over a period of three or four days I did a few look and learns for her and she was so surprised that I wasn't making a really big deal out of it. And she said, wait a minute, but you over eight. I mean this is a big deal. And I said really it's not. I mean, I over eight.
Speaker 2:
Yes, this is the reason why I go to the Lord. I ask him, you know, help me to see what. Why did I do that? What can I do different next time? And then I just move right on and wait for my body to use all of that fuel and when it's used up, that's it, I'm ready to eat again. And for her that was a big aha moment because every time she would have one meal like we're talking about here, that was, you know, too much. She felt like it should be this really big, hairy deal and that she would gain weight and that it's kind of that all or nothing mentality.
Speaker 2:
It's like oh my gosh, you know I'm going to quit, I'm going to start something else. I don't know what to do, Like I need to journal for 25 pages about this. And yet she saw that looking learn can be very, very quick, very simple. No condemnation, no shame. Let's move, let's learn and move on Right.
Speaker 1:
So I think that answers the question I was going to ask next, which is what can we do with that mistake, that belief, after I've eaten a really big meal the night before, that I'm going to have weight, you know, land on my body and all of that. There's a couple of levels to this. One is a belief that God can redeem it, that he will not waste anything, and we experienced that through look and learn, like you just said. So another truth that God would minister to me in this place is his desire for me to think with the mind of Christ would include having a greater passion to turn to him in my need. Then I have a tendency to when I'm turning to food outside of my physical need. That is the concern he shares.
Speaker 1:
I don't think God is as concerned about my physical body as I am. Certainly, I mean he wants the best for me, but the best for me from his perspective may not have a thing to do with two pounds. I mean, when you think about it, when you really think about it. So what I would want to do if I'm struggling with this belief is invite God to show me what is true about my heart in this? What is true about my body in this? What do you want me to think? How do you want me to respond? And certainly I think if there's gluttony involved, it's a stronghold. Strongholds are things that God has equipped us to handle, and if we diagnose it as a food and eating problem, there's a different way of handling it than if we diagnose it as a stronghold problem.
Speaker 1:
And so I think God wants me to see it as it is, which is a stronghold. It's like the source of the challenge for me is so much deeper than the food I put in my mouth and the scale number in the morning.
Speaker 2:
It does go back to that all or nothing and it goes back to, as you said, what is true from God's perspective, what is most important to God, what's most important is our hearts, for sure. So, yes, I definitely agree with that. But the all or nothing kind of leads into the next one. A lot of people are worried or concerned that if they eat too much at one sitting they might be triggered to keep eating, like for days and weeks and even months. And again it's that all or nothing. I mean they're all in or I'm all out. You know, I am either quitting or I'm starting something new.
Speaker 2:
And God, that's not the way he works. I mean, he is definitely all or nothing in his love for us and his grace for us, so he's the one that can use those words. But for us there is this happy medium, and that's why we love the term spirit lead eating, because it's not going to always look the same. Right, you know, you're going to have days where you eat more. You're going to have days when you eat less. You're going to have days when you're hungry more often or not. You're going to have days where you don't do it perfectly, and we're not even going for that. But what's important is that our heart is fixed on the Lord and that what we're doing is glorifying to him.
Speaker 1:
I think another truth that's really important at this moment is this idea of being triggered. It's almost like if you think of a trigger, of a gun once you pull the trigger, there's no stopping the bullet. There's no choice once the trigger has been pulled, to think that that goes with us into our eating is to believe a lie. I think we have to ask God what is the truth instead, and it is I have a choice. I can choose to stop eating right now. I can choose to stop right this minute. The fact that I have choice, you know, kind of makes it moot this idea of being triggered. It's almost like I feel like I'm a victim to some trigger.
Speaker 1:
And another thing about being triggered to keep eating it's not just overeating at a meal that some people think triggers them to keep eating, but it's certain foods. Oh, I can't have that in my house because that will trigger me. We always have a choice. God has graciously given us choice. In fact, one of our mind renewal tools is Lord I choose. And I love that because as a kid growing up, I didn't feel like I had choices. I lived in a dysfunctional home, like many people did, and I really didn't see choice. But now, as a grownup, I don't need to be a victim of my circumstances. I can rise above it and I can choose to not keep giving in to overeating. I can choose, I can choose.
Speaker 2:
Exactly, that's so so true.
Speaker 1:
So another thing that a lot of people are fearful of is that certain foods, food items, are fattening, and I definitely heard that a lot growing up and I still hear today, maybe said a little differently, but do you hear it pretty much today at all?
Speaker 2:
I don't really hear it today, but I definitely my mom, definitely my grandma would say that, oh, this food is fattening and I always thought what does that mean? What is that? In my mind? I was picturing fat like growing on my body. Oh dear, I'm sorry. Yeah you know, you eat this, and then there's more fat.
Speaker 1:
Right, as opposed to if you ate something else that isn't fattening.
Speaker 2:
And I can. I think about people saying things like well, if that, if I have that right now, you know I'll need to have a new size of jeans tomorrow. Or, you know, my, my thighs will grow three inches or something, and when I was younger, I had all these pictures in my mind about that. And that is not. This is not the way God works.
Speaker 1:
It's probably not his thoughts about it either, huh, so come reason with us to get together. Listener, I mean, really, when you think about it, if something has a lot of let's just say energy in it for lack of a better word, you know calorie dense if something has a lot of energy in it and I'm eating slowly and methodically, it will take less of that to fill me up, it just will. And so it's like one food isn't more fattening than the other. A portion size may be more fattening than the other.
Speaker 1:
It still comes back to why am I eating? How much am I eating? When am I eating? It's not what am I eating? I mean, that's really not the point. It can be at times. There's definitely no doubt about that. So the this idea that certain foods are fattening, and usually those are the ones that are heavier and fatten heavier, and sugar, and the ones that aren't fattening, or maybe they're called thinning. The foods that are thinning are celery and carrots and things like that. But you know, there we go Categorizing foods again, and I don't think that's what are God's thoughts about that whole approach, and he's given all things to us to enjoy. So you know, I think we can pretty well throw out this category of fattening foods and thinning foods.
Speaker 2:
Yes, let's bring in some balance and some joy, yeah.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, definitely. Another thing that and I can really relate to this is that people are can be afraid of is they approach a meal, it erodes their sense of peace is if they feel like they may have some food sensitivities and what's going to happen if they eat those foods anyway and okay. So in Revelation within, formerly thin within we have talked about using discernment and with the spirit led approach, we invite the spirit to guide and direct our choices, give us wisdom and it know. It doesn't mean you sit and obsess about every bite or every food selection you make, but if we want to operate to the best of our ability, if we want to be able to have energy, if we want to be able to not be ready to the bathroom, we may want to heed our body's signals that, okay, I don't do so well with that food or that food is really energizing, and then we're more likely to be able to respond to God's call in the moment or if it's across the world. I mean, it's true, I gotta tell you, it just feels to me like a lot of times we get hung up, thinking it through so much that we're not able to respond when God calls us.
Speaker 1:
We want to be able to pick up and go and I don't mean like just as a missionary, I mean go and visit the friend across the street. Or do you not feel like you can do that because you're not confident because of the way you've been treating your body? I mean, it can be any number of things, but what are God's thoughts about that? I think it's more related to you. Know, treat your body the way that you would if it belonged to somebody else, because it does. Our bodies are not our own. They belong to God. So, rather than eating foods I'm sensitive to or foods that I know make my stomach upset, maybe I need to invite God to give me the strength to have different desires and tell myself the truth.
Speaker 2:
Well, and just to feel free to say no thank you. You know that's a big one for me. I mean, there are certain foods right now that my body is not wanting me to have. The signals are strong. I know them for sure, and it's you know. Some of them are things that have just come up in the last couple years, and that's okay. You know, we go in and out of seasons like that and sometimes stay in them. Anyway, I think that it needs to be normal and acceptable, absolutely fine, to say no thank you. I will choose this instead, or maybe I'll have something later. It's really okay to do that. And again, if you watch people that are peaceful eaters, they're usually people that don't have trouble with that. They're able to say oh no, thank you. That's not for me, exactly so sometimes just practicing that is helpful.
Speaker 1:
No, thank you. Good idea. Another way that people approach food and eating might be with this concern that it's a way of establishing how I fit in some sort of pecking order or social acceptability. Am I approaching the food thinking that people are going to judge me based on what I select or don't select, like if I'm at a buffet of some sort or at a party with people, or maybe even somebody in a restaurant who works there, and I'm paranoid that they're going to judge me if I order a dessert or if I order extra rice with that or whatever it might be extra beans, extra cheese? Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 1:
So, yeah, I think that what God's thoughts are about that is we want to invite him to minister his grace to us, and I don't know some of the truth that I might hear him speak to me about. This might remind me that my value and my worth are not determined by anybody or anything else, and may feel like it at times, but it's not true. What's true is the God of the universe has declared me his precious daughter and he's called me more than a conqueror, and there's so much more to that. But I need to choose. I need to choose whether or not I will let myself make up stories in my head about people who will judge me or not, about what I eat, depending upon what I put on my plate, and really I think God would want me to stop the story making, which is what I tend to do is I just tend to go there and, yeah, if they are judging me based on my food and eating, that's on them.
Speaker 2:
that's kind of wrong it is, it is, and there's gonna always be somebody judging somebody about something, always, always, always. That's true. So if we are firm and solid and secure in our identity in Christ and we know where our value and worth comes from, then we're good to go Right. We're just good to go, you know. Choose the foods that you feel led to choose and enjoy.
Speaker 1:
Yes, we have one more that we want to talk about. We know there's probably a whole host of others, but this one is kind of common in certain times of year especially, and that's food pushers. If I have to approach a meal or food that's being offered, concerned about food pushers, that can really push some of my buttons. And food pushers if you're not familiar with that term, those are the people that want to love you with food or who want to be your eating buddy or they want you to be theirs. So they want you to come along on their food fest and so your godly boundaries that you may have, they want you to compromise those, because certainly you couldn't possibly want to deny yourself the opportunity to dive face first into this lovely buffet, whatever it is sitting before you.
Speaker 1:
I had food pushing friends for quite a while and I've pushed to them too, and I have to really be on the lookout for that, because the people pleaser in me wants to just go with it, and the person inside of me who still hasn't allowed God full access to my choices, I think, wants to be able to blame it on somebody else if I overeat. So that's true confession is there. You didn't hear it here. It wasn't me. So what are God's thoughts about food pushers? What would he say to my heart about this?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, you know, what comes to mind is one of our newer tools that we got from a mind renewal tool that we got from one of our participants, and that is I wonder, I wonder why that person feels the need. I wonder what's going on inside of them. Why are they feeling the need to push this on me? What's going on inside of them? Yeah, most likely it has very little or nothing to do with me and everything to do with their own needs, their own insecurities, their own issues with food and eating.
Speaker 2:
And so can I be compassionate? Certainly, can I stand my ground and say no, thank you, certainly. But can I be kind? Of course, can I be generous, yes, gracious, but also keep my boundaries intact. I think that's just a really, really important way to look at this whole food pusher thing. And, heidi, you mentioned people pleasing, and that's such a big one for so many of us. We have to be ready before we get there. Yeah, we want to renew our minds and invite God in before we even get there. Yeah, ready for any of these scenarios so that we can enjoy our time, keep our boundaries, keep focused on why we're there at the event to love God well and to love others well.
Speaker 1:
Wow, that was awesome. Yes, yes. So whether your fears are any of these that we mentioned, you know the truth is God has something for you, a truth he wants to minister to your heart. Most of these fears are rooted in lies of some sort, lies that I need other people's approval, or lies that I have to do this in order to be my happiest, or something. It just goes on and on. But if we stop in our tracks and say God what is true and invite him to impress on our hearts, he will. He will do that. He loves answering the prayer. Show me what is true. And what is true is I can't gain weight after just one meal. What is true is I have a choice to stop eating, I'm not triggered, and then it's over with. What is true is it's not the food that's the problem, it's me. It's the problem my heart of greed and so on. Just invite God to show you and he will minister to you in that place.
Speaker 2:
We hope that something that we've shared here has been helpful for you, and we're so glad you've been here. So join us next time on our next episode of Revelation Within On the Go.