On Spiritual Ambition - The Inspiring Example of Sayyida Khadijah (ra)

This reflection on Sayyida Khadijah (ra) was shared at the Diyanet Center of America as part of the series "Prominent Women of Islam: Stories of Faith and Resilience" 

The Prophet (saw) said , “Mary, the daughter of Imran, was the best among the women (of the world of her time) and Khadijah is the best amongst the women (of this nation).” Sahih Al-Bukhari – Book 58 Hadith 164

The Prophet (saw) said about Khadijah (ra): "God did not give me a better person than her. She believed in me when other people rejected me, she healed my disappointments when I needed that, she backed me and supported me while others blocked their support from me" (Musnad Ahmad)

Abu Huraira reported that Gabriel came to God's Messenger (saw) and said: God's Messenger, lo. Khadija is coming to you with a vessel of seasoned food or drink. When she comes to you, offer her greetings from her Lord, the Exalted and Glorious, and on my behalf and give her glad tidings of a palace of jewels in Paradise wherein there is no noise and no toil. Sahih Muslim 2432

Transcript

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I'd like to share my reflections on Sayyid Khadija Radiallahu Anha, may Allah be pleased with her. And I want to thank the Dianit Center of America in Maryland for inviting me and organizing this wonderful session. This wonderful series which allowed me to go back and spend some time with these spiritual giants, the mothers of the believers, the prominent women of Assam who are truly role models for us in every respect. And I'm just so grateful for all the work Diana Center is doing in bringing us together and allowing us to spend some time reflecting on how these spiritual giants, these spiritual heroes can speak to our moment, to our challenges, to our struggles, to my particular context. So last time we started reflecting on Sayyida Aisha Radiallahu Anha, who was also uh the wife of uh the Prophet. And last Sunday we had the opportunity to uh spend some time thinking about Sayyida Khadija Radiallahu Anha, who, as many, as many know, she was the first wife of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him. And so I'm every time every time I aim to engage with their lives and trying to get closer to them by understanding who they were and how they are truly mothers of the believers, that they are really embracing us in every way, that they are showing us the way, that they are that their legacy continues and still speaks to us, all of us, men and woman. So this is not this is not an endeavor that only relates to the woman of Islam or us as Muslim women, but we all, a man and woman, we all look up to them as our spiritual heroes, as our spiritual role models. So I'm going to share just a few observations I had as I was trying to enter their world and trying to understand more of who they were and how they would relate to our current context and our current moment. And that's really important because those are not just abstract historical figures from the past. Their legacy continues, their moral legacy and spiritual legacy is everlasting. And uh so I yeah, and and needless to say that I'm not going to do justice to any one of those. And this is really just a very, very narrow, very limited personal approach and understanding, but I hope that it's going to be beneficial to some. And I encourage everyone to go back and spend time with them and and really see how they speak to our lives and how they can guide us and embrace us. And when we think of a mother, that's what comes to mind is uh unconditional compassion and embrace, understanding, non-judgmental listening, and and and that's what I found with each one of them as I'm walking and learning with them. I feel they are speaking to me in so many ways. So I hope, I mean, for me, it really inspired and it's inspired me to really spend spend more time and going back. And like I said, these are not historical figures of the past. They are alive, their spirits are alive. In fact, their afterlife is more vivid than ever. And with our with our spiritual imagination, with our ability to dream and imagine and be inspired, we can spend time with them. They can walk with us in this journey of life, and we can walk with them. Because the human journey, the human experience is a universal one. The struggles, even if they might, even if they might be different in detail, the human journey is the same. The lows and highs, the pains and pleasures, the losses and gains, the darkness and the light, you know, all emotions we we can relate to, and they can relate to us. So I invite myself and everyone to, with our imagination, to transcend time and space and enter in that sacred universe, into that sacred orbit, and be in their company. Let them guide you and be guided by them. Let them guide us. If that heart connection is there, if we connect truly with our hearts, with these spiritual heroes, we will feel nourished and strengthened, and we feel we will feel illuminated. And that's what the Prophet teaches us and tells us that his companions are like stars. Whomever we follow, we will find our way, he says. Peace and blessings be upon him. So that's for me an important invitation. That the Sahabas, the companions of the Prophet, his male and female disciples, the men and women around him, are a blessing for us, a mercy for us, because each one of them, in their unique personality and character, in their way of being and moving in the world, are uh can speak to all of us. And we can find companionship. We can we do not have to find lonely. When I find we don't have to feel lonely, when I find I'm going through tough times, I simply ask and say, Oh Mother Khadija, please embrace me, guide me, show me the way, help me understand. And because she's been there where I've been. And the same holds true for all the amazing companions and disciples of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him. When we direct ourselves to them, when we communicate with them, their himmah, their help, their support with Allah's permission will come over us, will shower us and nurture us. And they hold our hand and we can walk through life with them. We don't have to be doing this alone, we don't have to live life alone. And and being in the community of these holy, sacred people of Allah, His beloved, and that's already a very important piece that I'd like to share. That we can always spend time with them. They are alive, their spirits are alive, the spirit is not confined by place, space, and time. And with Allah's permission, we can always be in their company and feel illuminated and enlightened. And as I was approaching their lives and was reading some books about Sayyidah Khadijah, what really stood out to me. Radiallahuana. And Sayyidah just for those who are not familiar, just means our lady. Lady Khadijah it's a it's an expression of reverence and respect and honor. So Sayyidah Khadijah, Radiallahuana, it's very interesting. They are all all these women, all these men, companions of the Prophet. They are all unique, of course, in in their own way. But what's so important is as the sources were reporting about them, there was nothing that would describe their outer appearance, their outward physical appearance. And that really struck me. There was nothing in the sources that described how they looked. Let's just let that sink in for a moment. I mean, this is a very this is a small community, a pre-modern, traditional, organic, small community, and these societies again are very intimate in that regard. They know each other very well, the people who live in these communities, they observe each other very well, they spend a lot of time together, everyone knows each other, and it's also a society that is very attentive to each other and notices a lot of things. And certainly when it comes to women, there is so much emphasis in our time, in our own time, on body image and physical appearance and outer beauty. And what I found so puzzling is that the sources were silent on how these women, these very important women in the lives of the Prophet, how they looked. And that is not to say that people at that time didn't value physical beauty or outward appearance. In fact, they did. But here's a very important element for us, a very important takeaway. The fact that the sources are silent about how they looked just shows us where the emphasis is in the tradition. So the the the main attention that Islam puts on people, and is especially on the on the on the companions and the wives of the Prophet and all these amazing spiritual giants, is on spiritual beauty, the moral beauty, the virtues, the beauty of character of Akhlak, and the beauty of high virtues and high morals and high ethics. That is where the tradition where Islam puts its most important emphasis. That's the core, inner beautification. And so it was it was really shocking to me that a society, I mean, that again spent so much time together, but and I'm sure these women, each of them, they were definitely in even in their physical beauty, were beautiful human beings. But the point that the tradition is literally silent, that the sources are silent at how about how they looked, how they appeared outwardly, just shows the great respect and the great emphasis Islam has for cultivating inner spiritual beauty. For me, that's a really important statement to observe. And we we are now in a time, in our current moment, where we spend a lot of time looking at ourselves, whether it's on in a Zoom meeting or in the mirror or in the phone, on the phone. We record uh constantly things about ourselves. So it's it's a moment where there is such great emphasis on how you appear and how you look, and we spend so much time on our outward appearance. And especially for women and young girls, there is so much pressure on body image and how we are perceived and how we are looked upon and how we present ourselves. But we can, especially a generation alpha, which you know, my my young daughter who who tells me she's generation alpha, that who spends literally so much time recording themselves and looking at their faces. And what does that mean for us? How how would how does that how does that match with the call of the tradition? And just to be clear, there's nothing wrong about vanity. Vanity meaning spending time, you know, taking care of yourself and being presentable. In fact, that's an act of worship, ibadah, right? To to take care of oneself's body and making sure you are presentable and you take care of yourself and you adorn yourself with beautiful clothes. But if that if that goes to an into into an extreme, that's where it becomes unhealthy vanity. And unhealthy vanity is when it becomes so excessive that your thoughts are consumed by how you look constantly, this this over-excessive thinking about how you are perceived by others and how how how your physical appearance is displayed. And so Islam has nothing against beautification, outward beautification, you know, taking care of yourself. When I went to the presentation, or if I go into out the community, I take care of myself, and I do enjoy you know making sure that I'm dressed properly, that there's a harmony between the pieces that I choose, that I'm presentable, that's for me also an expression of Islam's grace and dignity and beauty and aesthetics. There's nothing wrong with that. But if again 90%, 99% of my desire to beautify myself is placed on outward beauty and in trying to constantly fix my body in a certain way, that's where it then becomes unhealthy vanity. So we have all these desires about beautification, but when we look at how Sayyidah Khadija and the other women, those spiritual heroes, had such an ambition in beautifying their character and leaving beautiful spiritual legacy, it already tells us how to channel our desire for beautification and vanity. And that what outlasts me is not my physical beauty, my body is declining and my beauty is disappearing. That is something that also to be accepted in a sense, because there's no stopping that process, that youthful, beautiful look, that is not everlasting, it's not for infinity, and it will not be forever. It is a blessing from Allah for a certain season in my life. But the fact that the body is fragile and we are not made of out of iron and steel, and that eventually I have to accept the reality of each change, of aging, and and that I will not look always as beautiful from the outward or physically is also something to cultivate, that contentment, that ganaa, that acceptance, that those are seasons in my life and beautiful seasons, and those are blessings from Allah that I cannot keep always. But here it comes the fact that Allah promises that this youthful and this dynamic existence will be returned back to us, right? That I will I will get that back. That inshallah, if I dedicate, dedicate my youth and my energy and my life to Allah, if I make a commitment to live a life pleasing to Him, then Allah promises me that I will get I will get all of those back. That beauty and that dynamic youth and all the blessings that I enjoyed in this life. Alhamdulillah, this is the promise that then, and the hope that allows us to embrace these realities of life, that beauty is not something that we have control, outward beauty that we can keep forever. And and so if we become so invested, especially in this time, like I said, where we have now this phenomenon of being consumed by body image, if if we give in to certain societal pressures and peer pressures to look in a certain way, and and that's then where it becomes really unhealthy and destructive. So Islam teaches us through these amazing women to make a commitment to beautify our inner character. And that is where the tradition puts us greatest focus, to spend our lives on things that will outlast, outlast us a long time after we are gone, that people will look back and Allah loves us when we beautify our inner character, our morals, our virtues, and and try to constantly improve ourselves in that regard. And that is where we invest our energy, our time, our concerns, right? Like to really worry about how I can cultivate a better personality and beautify myself inwardly. So, in short, we all, especially women, want to beautify themselves, right? That is a very natural uh inclination. It's in our futra, it's inborn. You know, women want to present themselves and beautify themselves. And again, there's nothing wrong with that. But 90% of that desire and that feeling has to be turned inwardly. And how do we see that? We see that in the example and the model of the woman of Sayyidah Khadija. Again, we don't we don't know anything about how she looked, and I'm sure she was a beautiful woman, elegant, noble, graceful. But there is this great respect and admiration for her, and the the legacy that she left was the spiritual beauty. Those are the virtues that we can all cultivate, and that's where we can connect. And she is known as al-Tahira, the pure, and and that's a very beautiful description of her persona. That she was literally, she was so noble, so so adorned with high virtues and values that people called her. The community testified to her as a tahhira, the pure. I mean, is there is a a higher title than this? Isn't that isn't that the most amazing compliment that one can? And this is not about just the outward purity. But it truly speaks to her inner purity, the clarity and the nobility, and the grace, and the dignity she displayed in all of her interactions. So that was one thing that really stood out to me. Just this uh challenging our notion of beauty. What what what is it? How do we channel beautification in in constructive ways and in a way that leaves a moral and spiritual legacy? That's how she is remembered. At the end, nobody will remember if I had pretty brown eyes or beautiful hair, or if I, you know, if my body looked in a certain way. That's not relevant. It's not relevant. What is relevant and everlasting is that inner spiritual beauty. And so to pause and slow down and think about this in my life, where do I direct my energy of beautification? And there is this whole industry that feeds off of this of this desire of beautification, that that relate to our anxiety. We want to keep our beauty, and that is an evidence for the Akra, for the eternal life, that we we want to be youthful and beautiful outwardly. But again, to reiterate, the reality is that we cannot, we do not have control over that. If I would spend time, you know, I I listened to this one one dermatologist and who who who uh shared all her insights and wisdom about how to take care of skin. And we could spend all day in the bathroom and still there would be things that would annoy us. And so it's something that is we have little control about you know these things, and to be clear and to stress to take care of oneself, of the body is a sacred trust in a manner, but it has to be in a way that we do not waste our precious time and energy because this is a very limited, short, brief time on earth, and to really have our priorities set right, and we learn that from Sayyida Khadija, Radiallahu Anha, how she invested herself fully, right, fully, and made a commitment to leave a spiritual legacy, and so that is where I deeply connect that. That's that's where I feel I I can learn a lot from her in that regard, and that is also something that we see across the board. That Islam says teaches us that the outward beauty is one that is finite and and fleeting, and so how do I make sure that I will get back that that beauty in infinite ways in an everlasting way by spending my my desire for beautification on things that truly are important, right? Cultivating of character. So, and just as a side note, it's really important to take care of oneself because the body is a sacred trust, and we are created as noble human beings, and that means that we make sure that we physically are nourished. So it's so important to have to have good quality sleep, to make sure that we sleep at least seven, eight hours, that we have healthy nourishment and nutrition, a good diet, eat wholesome and thai food, things to to minimize ultra-processed or processed foods and to to ideally stay away from these things and to eat things where human hands have not touched a lot and which is still you know pure. Those are all Quranic, you know, this is the Quranic guidance for us. And so if we want to be beautiful in that regard, those are really the most important things as well. Good quality, healthy sleep, good quality, healthy diet and nutrition, wholesome food, type food, and movement, right? And those are the things that also add to a beautiful outward appearance, but also keeps your spiritual glow intact. So that's but just a little uh humble advice. And those are the three things that will always come back. And I'm just sharing this again, coming from that dermatologist who shared that. That is really if we want our skin to also look beautiful, those are the three main ingredients. It starts from within again, right? From within to make sure that we have these three things prioritized. And sadly, I'll see in my community that people do not have enough quality sleep. You know, we spend hours on the screen, the night is for rest. Allah has created specific times, times are sacred, and to honor that divine rhythm is really important to allow your body to rejuvenate and regenerate and be replenished and restored, and that happens at night. And when we do not have that critical amount of time, also impacts, of course, our inward beauty, but also our outward beauty. So just to keep that also in mind as we take care of our bodies, which are which are a sacred trust from Allah in Amannah, and they are the vessel, sacred vessel through which we experience Allah's divine signs around us. So it's it's really important to make sure our bodies are kept intact and taken care of. So to go back to that beautiful spiritual legacy, so Sayyid al-Khadija, we know that she met the Prophet when she was 25. So but excuse me, she she uh got married to him when she was 40, but by the age of 25, she already had experienced a lot. She was married twice and became a widow at this very young age, because many of you know that the desert environment of the seventh century was a harsh environment. And so mortality rates were high. And I think her husband died in a war situation or some some kind of so very early on. I I don't remember the exact circumstances, but but but what I do recall as a fact in the sources, she was very young, 25 years old, had children, uh, a widow, so already a lot of life experience there. She was a successful, noble businesswoman, highly ambitious, highly established, independent, already had a strong footing in her life. And so she's actually, she doesn't need to remarry, right? If you just look at her circumstances and her context, and I'm saying this because this is really important for those of us who, especially as women who pursue an education, a career, we can find a lot of wisdom in her lifestyle, right? And so there's nothing wrong in being pursuing an education or a career and being ambitious and having wealth. She's a very healthy uh woman, uh very noble. So she has this very high status in her community. But when she comes across the Prophet, it's very odd that she she so many people propose to her, but she rejects. And you know, wealthy men and people of high social status. But what's so interesting about her, again, showing her emphasis on spiritual and moral beauty, she is really drawn to the Prophet. She sees his noble witnesses and hears about her his noble character, especially how he is dealing as her representative of uh leading her business. And that is where, of course, she really encounters the same spiritual beauty and nobility in him, the graceful behavior, and he is from this high noble character. So you see already this theme of her focus and of the tradition to really concentrate on somebody's inner beauty. The Prophet has very modest means. Yes, he is from this reputable tribe, the Quraysh, but at the same time, he is not somebody who is as wealthy as her or can provide to her. And in fact, that's when he receives that proposal, that is one of the reactions he has. Like, I cannot provide for her. She is so she is so wealthy, she's so established, she's such an independent and successful businesswoman. How can I ever be worthy for her? But yet she insists and she chooses him. It's very interesting, right? So she doesn't really care, and she doesn't need to, like I said, remarry or need somebody. She doesn't need anybody at this point. I mean, she she is really uh mature and independent, but she seeks that kind of she sees that spiritual beauty in him and really longs and yearns for that spiritual companionship and that emotional companionship. And that's where the matches, that's where the the the alignment of values and virtues come together. That she he is somebody who she feels really aligns with her spiritual values, and and she has this high spiritual ambition for having someone on her side who can really cater to that desire, right? So I found this very interesting in how she made that choice. And this is of course relevant for those of us who pursue a marriage and a marriage partner. What are the criteria that she sets? Which outmost priority for her is really the inner beauty, the nobility, the virtues, the moral character. And then, you know, of course, she's she doesn't need wealth or material, she has no material interests. But how often do you say that, do you see that coming up in in our times that those things are maybe more on the forefront? And when it comes to inner beauty and spiritual character, those somehow are kind of a little more in the background. And uh just her deep insight in telling us and teaching us what should be our priorities in in our relationships, in our desire to pursue marriage and seeking a partner in our lives. What is really something that provides the most stable foundation in a marriage? It's really that kind of deep anchoring yourself in high principles. And there is a secret narration by the Prophet in which he tells us that you marry a person, in that case a woman, for three reasons: the the her beauty, her status, or her wealth. And he says, choose the one who has firm faith, deen, or religion. I'm I'm paraphrasing, and you will have all of that. And subhanAllah, you see that reflected in the choices that Sayyida Khadija made, right? She chooses one, the Prophet, who gives her that, what is the most stable, most eternal foundation, the the one that is really will always be permanent. Wealth, if someone is wealthy, you know, yet that can diminish and can disappear overnight. Somebody can lose their wealth. Beauty is also something that we know is fleeting. Status, right? We can say high-profile people who can lose their status overnight, that kind of privilege and social ranking. But what really outlasts everything is deen, and it provides a stable foundation, that kind of spiritual found foundation and a principle where two people who want to grow together. So I always, you know, I give that example of a pyramid. If Allah is on top and you have husband and wife on both sides who are trying to come closer to Allah, as you come closer to Allah, you come closer to each other. So if Allah as top priority and your absolute object of your love and desires is top priority, as you're trying to both reach Him, you also come closer together. And that is the shared language, the shared vision, the shared vocabulary where a relationship can flourish and thrive. And when things get messy and complicated and tough in a family or in a marriage or in a relationship, having Allah as your top focus always brings you back to that shared vision that we have one goal. Together we are want to grow closer to Allah. And how can we help and support each other accomplish that? So she is someone who chooses her marriage partner according to that spiritual ambition. She's ambitious to reach Allah, to come closer to Him. And who is the one who can help her do that, who can who can support her in that journey of spiritual growth? And of course, there's no one better than the Prophet, the beloved, who helps all of us to come closer to Allah and grow in our relationships. And it just again shows us this theme, uh, this consistent theme in her life, always making a commitment towards spiritual beauty, and how can I beautify myself character-wise, how can I cultivate virtues and nobility, and who is there to help me, to can who can support me on that journey? And then, of course, she is the one then who proposes, who's very direct and assertive in proposing to the Prophet. It's beautiful. And she is the one who then anchors him. She is the first believer, the one who embraces Islam as the first person. She is the calm in the storm. So when the Prophet is very distressed and unsettled after his first encounter with Jibril, with the archangel Gabriel, he seeks her comfort. And he is embraced by her, and she is the one who assures him that Allah will never, never disgrace him, that she knows him so well. And so there is a moment of self-doubt, like a moment where he is shaken, but she's not. She's not. She is, if anything, she bears witness to his noble character and virtues. And that is so profound. Like she is not shaken, she is not in doubt, she has no second thoughts, she's not puzzled. She is the one who provides that refuge. She is the strong supportive castle where he is in a moment where he's utterly distressed, and and of course, spending a very long time in that cave, and all of a sudden you have an angel appearing in front of you and confronting you with uh a very heavy insight that you're chosen and you are a prophet. That's something that's that is hard to process. And so as he runs home, he goes home and and shares that with her, that encounter, that holy encounter, where he's overcome by really big feelings. She is so steady, she is so stable, and because she is steady, she can hold him. Meaning she's so anchored, she's so she's so sure and certain, subhanAllah. And so that's very profound to me. It's like uh you know that that day, that morning when I was reading about her, and my young daughter had a moment where she she had a very you know challenging moment and distressed about something. And I just in that moment, you know, if I would have gone gone to given into my desires of anger and yelling at her, but in that moment I just thought about Sayyida Khadija and said, I want to be like her, I want to connect to her, and I want to be the calm in the storm, I want to be a source of peace and not panic. I want to be a source of tranquility and not pain. I want to uplift others when they are having a difficult time. And so in that moment, I just I just sought her embrace. I try to connect to her, and then subhanAllah, the magic, it worked. It was a sincere prayer that Ya Allah make me like her. I want to be an embodiment of her calmness and peace. I want to be steady in this life and not feel overcome by anger and confusion. And so that was that was such a beautiful way to connect to her. And and I was able, because I was steady in that moment, I was emotionally steady, then I was able to hold my own child. But if I'm not steady, I cannot hold my child, I cannot guide her, I cannot nurture her, and so that is so important. Like we can we can find ways to connect to their very particular experiences, and that's a huge moment in the Prophet's life. He he saw in her, he he was assured by her, she was his greatest witness. She bore she bear she bore witness, she did bear witness that he is Sadiq al-Ameen. He is a righteous and trustful person, and the whole community is testifying to that. So when we are sometimes in doubt, and especially in this in this time of uncertainty and doubts and questioning, some of it is healthy and some of it is also, quite frankly, unhealthy. Questioning everything about the Prophet's life and being in doubt. If if I find myself in that kind of moment of doubt and questioning and suspicion, I should turn to the witnesses around him, the companions, the woman in his life, Sayyidah Khadija, who is a witness, who is a witness to his profound and beautiful character, to his truth, to his steadfastness, to his righteousness, to his authenticity, his credibility, you cannot lie or fake that. You cannot make that up or construct that. You cannot fabricate that. So when we oftentimes you know you encounter people diminishing the Prophet's life and sunnah and saying it's just sunnah, it's not relevant, it's not important. That's not right. Because that would somehow that would contradict the profound witnessing of all these companions, the disciples of the Prophet who came from all walks of life, and they all testified to his authenticity. And the most intimate one, his spouse, his wife, who spent all these years together with him, who knows him so well, tells us he is the one, he is the one, he is truly a messenger of Allah who came. With a profound revelation to guide humanity. Then that should give us pause and think like, why am I questioning? What is it? Why am I in doubt? And so I can turn to them. And they can provide me the answer. And the proof that He is indeed a messenger of God, the final messenger of God. So that is again in this age of deconstruction and uncertainty, and always, you know, this we call it in the academy, the hermeneutics of suspicion. We're always suspicious of religious texts and sources. This is again a small traditional organic community in which everyone knows each other, and especially your wife will know who you are. And so you can go to her, right, and all the other close witnesses of the Prophet's life, and there you will not you will not find any doubt and questioning. They all saw him, they observed him, they lived with him. We have all the private accounts, he's the most detailed historical figure. So that is something that then cultivates yaqeen, certainty in the message. And that's how he also felt. Can we make them alive? She affirmed me. She believed in me when others rejected me. That's why she loved he loved her so much. That's a it's a big statement by a woman who is of again who's known as a Pahira, the purest, who everyone knows as a noble, graceful, dignified woman, well established. There is no interest in wealth and material desires or goals. She has no interest in that. She's absolutely transcended that. She had no desire for that, and she didn't choose the Prophet because of that. She has no interest in some type of high-profile privilege status or money or certain worldly aims. Totally not. We see that in how she chooses the Prophet. There's nothing worldly there, it's all about spiritual ambition. I want somebody who brings me closer to Allah. And choosing, making that the priority. And when he finally declares that he received the revelation, she is the first to attest to the truth. It's very powerful. And then the Prophet says, goes on and says, She was the one who believed in me when others rejected me. She supported me with her wealth when I had nothing. Right? Isn't that amazing? She was the one who invested and sacrificed all her wealth, her energy, her money, all her support went into the prophetic message. And not once did she say, because of you, I lost my comfortable, wealthy lifestyle. We know from the seerah and her life that she she died in a terrible way because the Prophet, by his own people, had to endure starvation, famine, three years boycott, where your own relatives, your own family, your own tribe, your own community abandons you. And Sayyidah Khadija was forced to leave her comfortable life, her life of convenience and and and tranquility, and move into a tent into the desert and suffer from starvation and malnutrition. Many scholars say that she probably has died because of the malnourishment, the results of that. And then, of course, when she dies, the Prophet is in such sorrow that we know this year to be the year of sadness, the year of sorrow. And then, of course, his Uncle Abu Talib dies, he loses him as a support. But she was one of his greatest supporters, the one who kept him steady and was a source of comfort and peace and calm and tranquility. He could come to her and would know everything will be alright. And she never questioned him, not once. She never complained or accused him of losing all her status and wealth because of the prophetic message. She was willing to give it all. She believed in him. That again is a testament for us. For those of us in this age of certainty, uncertainty, and doubts and suspicion. This is a huge statement. And somebody gives up everything for the cause of for that holy cause, showing us and and showing us that she is an embodied witness. This is not just some lip service. This is a profound statement on her end. And if we don't heed that call, if we don't pay attention, then I think we will be in a cycle of doubts and uncertainty and suspicion. So she values this Sunnah so high, she values the prophetic message in such high esteem. We can do that too. And if we are following her path, if we as well give our everything to this cause, to this holy cause, our energy, our health, our youth, our beauty, our knowledge, our resources, our skills, our careers, those are beautiful blessings. But for her, they were not the end goal. They were the means to reach the ultimate goal, to please Allah. So everything that we have, pursuing a career, pursuing wealth, there's nothing wrong. She had it all, but she knew how to use these blessings in a way that would further and advance those holy causes, spiritual causes. It's very important for us how she in every in every regard, and that's why the Prophet has such love for her and deep respect. This was a very fragile, in these very fragile years, these 13 years, these very young early community that was going through so much suffering, torture, ridicule, persecution. She was there to support and in every in every way the Muslim community, especially her husband, the Prophet. And so that's the reason why he loved her so much, is so explained by her own statement. She supported me with all her wealth. And he he was really a person of modest means. He didn't have much. And not once do we see her saying, complaining, that she from 100% wealth went into 100% poverty. SubhanAllah, that is why she is, as the Prophet says in the narration, that Allah, she's the only one who receives Allah's greetings of salam. We know that from the Prophet when he tells her Jibreel is present, and he wants me to tell you that he brings Allah's salamus to you, and that he has promised a palace and paradise for you, and that there will be no no noise and no distress. I again I'm paraphrasing, but this is this is a huge blessing, of course, for her. And then she replies back and says, Please also offer my greetings to Jibreel. And she's the only one who is honored to receive Allah's greetings of peace because she was. She was that source of Qa'an. And so the Prophet says to she is one of the best of the women, right? She is mentioned as the four women of paradise. And then we have Asiya Radiallahu Anha, and then Sayyidina Sayyidah Maria Malaysana. Those are the women of paradise. And Sayyidina Khatija receives that divine compliment and that Allah has prepared for her an amazing, eternal place of happiness. So we can be the things that the Prophet loved about those amazing, about this amazing woman. I shared that before, that quote that resonated with me. Be the things that you have that you love most about the people who are gone. We can all keep Saida Khadijah's legacy alive by embodying her virtues of purity, of nobility, of righteousness, of of steadfastness, of patience, of endurance, of generosity and gratitude and charity. She was one who shared everything with the community. Everything. The people who are able to uplift others when they are in a moment of pain and sorrow. That was her. What an amazing spiritual giant and what an amazing expression of spiritual ambition. We all want to be ambitious, and there's nothing wrong about being ambitious, but again, being ambitious about the right things, spiritual ambition, moral ambition, and choosing the people in our lives who remind us of that final destination. First of all, the companionship of these spiritual giants, and then the companionship, the fellowship, the suchbah, the friends in this world, in our community, who remind us of our ultimate return, who help us achieve these goals, these spiritual goals. And she would she would take care of the children. And while the Prophet was in this state of retreat, of spiritual retreat, spending significant time in the cave, she would walk to that cave, which is a huge distance, and she would bring him provision, she would bring him food and make sure that he he was taken care of. I mean, again, this is mind-blowing to me as somebody who gets very anxious, even if her husband leaves for two days for a conference, and I feel, oh, he shouldn't stay longer. And this is for a good cause. This is for something that, again, trying to be supportive, but when I when I see her support, how much she is supporting him, that selfless sacrifice, and and already seeing how the prophetic message was uh will unfold, and she has that kind of foresight, I believe, right? Like there is no more moment of complaint. And imagine a woman who her husband disappears four months into a mode of spiritual retreat, and then she has to take care of the children and the household and basically functions like a single mother. I mean, this is huge. This is huge. That's why she has such an elevated status, and may Allah allow us to walk her path, to to be supportive on people's spiritual journeys and growth. And she is doing that with her husband, supporting the Prophet in his in his endeavor, and she senses that something great is happening, something groundbreaking will be happening. And and just her dedication and commitment and how she supports them is again something that I can look up to and and find so much meaning and and and light. Again, she has such an exceptional character, except exceptional spiritual embodiment of virtues. I I think a lot about virtues these days. Virtues are literally expressions of moral and spiritual excellence. To do things in the most beautiful way, and you look at her life, I feel that she accomplished that. She really was a person of virtue, of nobility, of high values, of high regard, a person of grace, a person of honor, and exceptional spiritual character and moral beauty, someone that we can find so much wisdom. And of course, as a grieving mother, she is one that I look up to deeply in my own grief and sadness and sorrow because she is one, as we know. She lost two children in her two sons in infancy, like very young age, as you know, Qasim and Abdullah, two sons, and then she had four girls, four daughters, who, except Fatima, all died in young adulthood. So she knows what loss feels like, what pain feels like, what sorrow feels like, and yet she endures with grace and steadfastness and she perseveres. She knows that Allah will compensate her. So we don't have any even account of her complaining or grieving excessively. And she carries that grief. I'm sure any one of us who has lost a loved one, you carry that with you for the rest of your life. But at the same time, she lives with that hope. She's guided by the prophetic message and the promise of Allah that she will be reunited with her children. And what is so painful is after her son dies, and we know that in that culture, and even today, sons are in a sign of or an expression of successorship, of leaving an heir behind, a successor behind, a legacy behind. So both of her sons die, return to Allah, and then the community, those enemies of Islam, they mock her, they mock the Prophet, saying, and this is how we know the Surah Tul-Kauthar was revealed, responding to these, to these mockings and the insult and the painful ridicule that those enemies of Islam direct to the Prophet and to her, to the family, saying you are you are lost, you are cut off, you don't have any heir, you don't have any successor, you are a loser, you are a failure, Hasha. I mean, this is such a painful thing to just read. Like you are going through the most tragic experience in your life. The greatest distress and pain an adult can experience is the death of their child. And in that intense grief, you are also being mocked and insulted and looked down upon. And you are you are seen as a failure, as unproductive. And subhanallah, some of it holds still true. And so the greatest mercy and rahmah that Allah shows us in this moment is, and in Surahul Qathar, is that leaving a legacy behind is not two children or sons in particular. There is a whole paradigm shift in that moment. So it's through the pain of the Prophet and Soul Sayyidah Khadija'an that we learn your legacy is by faith and by moral beauty and by a moral and spiritual legacy. It's not by it's not by leaving children behind. They are a blessing, yes. And Allah tells us that some He blesses with sons, some He blesses with girls, with daughters, and some He makes infertile. That's all from Allah. All of it is beautiful. But when we look at the Prophet Khadija radiallahu, they didn't see that as the end of their lives. Right? So there is a whole whole shift for us that true legacy is not to sons, but to faith, impact, and message. It's what kind of spiritual impact, moral impact are you leaving behind? How can you still nurture a generation after you, even if you don't have children on your own? The capacity to nurture, guide, educate, raise a generation after you. There is still possibility, and we see that in those amazing spiritual giants through the life of Sayyidah Khadija radiallahu, where she was not just consumed and obsessed, consumed by excessive grief and that pain and sorrow, but she dedicated herself, committed herself to raising a generation of spiritual giants. And today she speaks to me, right? And she shows us that hardship and loss is not a sign of Allah's anger, it is a sign of Allah's closeness, right? It is a sign of Allah's closeness, Allah elevates you, Allah increases your ranks. It doesn't mean that He punishes a servant through child loss or any type of loss or the loss of health or loss of wealth. If that would be the case, we would have if if that would be the case, I mean how could we then reconcile? That with their lives. They were the most the most pious, the most virtuous, the most righteous people. By worldly standards, they lived a miserable life of poverty, loss, starvation, ridicule, persecution. Yet they are the ones who are the most elevated. So what people saw as loss, Allah declared as elevation. Those are the powerful teachings that she leaves us, leaves to us behind. And may Allah allow us to find that light in in that in those important lessons. And may Allah allow us to leave a moral and spiritual legacy behind. And may Allah allow us to be in their secret company in the hereafter. And make us understand that true legacy is not to children or outward beauty, but is through that spiritual beauty and that moral beauty that we leave behind and that will outlast our lives.