043 How To Develop An Abundance Mindset Instead Of A Scarcity Mindset

Icebreaker: Concerts! Extreme, Kid Ego, Taylor Swift Reputation Album

06:47 Mindset: Abundance VS. Scarcity - some new ways to look at these ideas

08:20 You get to choose how to view structure in your life

18:43 Be Water - Bruce Lee, create an abundance mindset by bending around your environment (some Zen philosophy)

29:48 "End Of History Illusion"- Cognitive Bias

31:04 Tim Ferriss with Derek Sivers

43:32 Jen Sincero

44:22 Being generous helps you build an abundance mindset

51:38 Most of what we think of as "personality traits" can be altered as a skill

01:10:16 A powerful summary for developing abundance

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Transcript

Tali: 0:56

I am Tali Zabari. Hi, I'm

Cody: 0:58

Cody Limbaugh. Welcome

Tali: 0:59

to the Live All Your Life Podcast.

Cody: 1:23

Well, hello there. Hi darling.

Tali: 1:25

How's it going? I'm good. I'm excited about this recording. Me too. We are deviating a little bit from Philosophy of Fitness, even though I'm sure fitness will find its way into today's episode anyway, always. It's the water we swo in. It is, it's the lens in which we see the world. But this is kind of our first installment of just the Live All Your Life podcast as kind of a, a foundational sort of platform. Yeah.

Cody: 1:54

That's such a central theme. Mm-hmm. I think the central theme of Live All Your Life is living all your life. So it's largely personal development, that type of thing, self-examination, but personal development is a wide, wide net. It is. Cuz there's relationships and business and finance and fitness and all that. Oh yeah. So Big Bucket.

Tali: 2:15

It's all relevant. So the podcast, the podcast, the icebreaker that I have for today is Inspired by the concert tickets that we bought today. Mm-hmm. We love to go to concerts. I think it's something that you and I bonded over very quickly. I remember when you and I first met, I had a whole bunch of concerts lined up because I just love having something to look forward to and live music is the best

Cody: 2:44

it is. Yeah.

Tali: 2:46

Awesome. So what's your icebreaker? My icebreaker is so you and I are gonna go see shows that we're like both extra excited about. Yes. You are gonna be seeing extreme. Mm-hmm. I'm coming with you. And I'll be seeing Taylor Swift, which is just like a, it's the Aeros tour, so it's kind of a concert of a lifetime. So I'm really excited. And I wanted to ask which song you're most looking forward to hearing or hoping to hear, cuz both of them have very extensive discographies at this point. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. What you would love to hear when you go to the show,

Cody: 3:20

Mm, I was thinking about this a little bit earlier.

Tali: 3:23

We should link to these songs too.

Cody: 3:25

Oh yeah. Well, I'll link for to the bands and songs, et cetera. The so extreme, the by their name, they're very extreme, so they have a very eclectic mix of music over the years. In general, they're a rock band, so those of you who have not heard of them which is probably many of you, cuz they're kind of a, a niche following. But if you are into the era of say like Van Halen and that type of rock and roll from the eighties, nineties that's, that's sort of their genre is Hard Rock from that era. But they are very eclectic. Like they have a blue song, a jazz song. They've got some cl like they had a whole symphony on one of their albums. Whoa. So anyway I, even though this is a new album tour, I'm hoping to hear some throwbacks, like there's one from their very first album called Kid Ego, and it's just, A cool, funky, hard rock blues kind of song. I don't know why it's been stuck in my head a lot lately cuz it's really in anticipation. It's from their very first album, like way back. Oh wow. So I don't expect to hear it, but it would be cool if they threw something like that

Tali: 4:35

in there. Maybe you could just yell it out. Roll out as a suggestion. Yeah.

Cody: 4:39

And I was also thinking this is like really I, yeah man, I'm not gonna go into what? Well, I have this music book, I have a book of that album that Kid Ego on, which is a self-titled album Extreme. That was the album. And I have a music book, like for the piano or for like guitar and stuff. Okay. I have a music book of the album. So every song on the album is in it, like the sheet sheet music for it. And I thought about bringing it and see if I could get an auto autograph or something. That would be so cool.

Tali: 5:09

That would be cool. I have one of Taylor Swift's too. Maybe I, I'm gonna be pretty far away from the stage though.

Cody: 5:14

Yes. You might have to attach a Boomerang or something in there. Or like

Tali: 5:18

a I'll bring like a fishing pole. Yeah. Those have

Cody: 5:21

reach. Are you, are you cool with Stage front when we go to the Extreme concert?

Tali: 5:26

So part of my experience as someone who went to a lot of shows is that I would always push to the front, and not only is that the best seat in the house, but I'm also very short. Yes. So being in the back is hard. But I used to go to shows on my own. Mm-hmm. So that it was just easy to like show up when I wanted leave, when I wanted move to wherever I wanted. Yeah. We'll

Cody: 5:50

have to get there early. That's fine. Okay. Yeah. You cool with that? Yeah. Okay. Because I'm hoping to get another pick too. I have a pick from the Lash Show I saw of them. Like they dropped the pick? No, they throw'em out in the crowd sometimes and it's got Nino's signature on one side. Oh wow. And then the extreme logo on the other and I still have it from their tour that I went to at the same venue in like the early nineties. It was at the

Tali: 6:15

Roseland. Yeah. No way. Really Cool. Okay. That'll be really fun. It's gonna be fun. For the Taylor Swift concert, I can't say I have a particular song in mind, more like an album and it's the ERAS tour, so they're all

Cody: 6:33

gonna be, you're cheating. You always ask me favorites. Well, I actually

Tali: 6:36

did have one in mind, but when I think about what would be the most fun is. Really anything from her reputation album. Mm-hmm. And I think one of the reasons it's so fun is because I very much underestimated that album. When it first came out. I listened to it and I was like, eh, I don't really like this. It's very synthesized and like really modern and just really different from anything she did before. And it has become one of my favorite albums. It's very angsty. Mm-hmm. Which, you know, always seems to resonate with me. Mm-hmm. So it's gonna be awesome. I'm, if anything, I'm just more hung up on what I'm gonna wear. Yeah.

Cody: 7:18

That's not new for you though. It's not. Yeah. Well now you have two concerts to shop for. Yeah.

Tali: 7:26

Yeah. That's exciting.

Cody: 7:28

Yeah. So we have a, a general topic that we wanted to touch on today, but we may just choose to riff. This is just gonna be a conversational podcast, but we had an interesting coaching call. Earlier today, and the idea of an abundance mindset versus a scarcity mindset came up, but it was used in a very different context than the way I have always thought of it. And so I might just let you kick off with the ideas that you were throwing around with our client this morning. Sure. And and then we'll kind of circle back around to some of the more I don't know, traditional or the one, the, the ideas around it that I'm used to. Sure. Exploring

Tali: 8:07

well as the coach in our equation, who takes care of the nutrition side of things. We were talking about, you know, the shift in food choice that our program is prompting and our client had mentioned something about. Maybe initially feeling restricted by her macro count or what we're asking of her. And then she mentioned something about shifting her mindset to having more of an abundance focus where just because there are guardrails or boundaries or parameters or whatever you wanna call them in this methodology, there's a, a big world on that other side that she can work with. Mm-hmm. And I think what's so important about f you know, thinking of it that way is when we feel restricted, it's easy to feel rebellious or defiant. And a lot of unfavorable behavior can come out of that feeling of restriction. And so the thing about abundance mindsets is that it's really a decision. Mm-hmm. You know, you can look at the same. Problem, the same scenario. And, you know, try on both of those methods. And they'll both be valid. They'll both totally work every time. And I think just leaning into abundance or considering abundance just like opens up a whole world that sometimes we're just shut off to because our focus is maybe more negative or we're feeling any, like, some sort of like fear or newness that might not be. Usual to us. And so it just feels like a bad fit at first, because we're being asked by our coaches or our professions or whatever to maybe do things that we're not used to doing. But that doesn't mean it's inherently bad, or it doesn't mean that it's inherently ill fitting. Yeah.

Cody: 10:15

The, the reframing of the same situation can be really powerful. There's this idea of people going on diets. I mean, this has been going on for forever, it seems like. I mean, I, within our culture, it's been. Decades, if not centuries. Mm-hmm. Of, of dieting in different forms. And it's always sort of based on a restrictive diet. Like you can't have this and you can't have that, and you can't have too much of this. And the ideas that we were talking about today is like, well look at all the things you can have that are good choices and look at all the opportunities you have to, to nourish your body in positive ways and still be able to indulge once in a while in something that is just purely for a pleasure sensation. Yeah. And. So it's this, it's a little different context, like I said, from the way I've thought about it before, but it's kind of a way of reframing guardrails, if you will, or structure mm-hmm. In a way that does not feel like overly restrictive. Yeah. And there's some psychology that I was thinking of during our call of sort of like the rebellious teenager cliche. Mm-hmm. And in my experience as a parent and also as a teenager, and you've done it all. I've done it all. And and just kinda looking at society in general and, and just noticing this about people that any time, anytime there's a feeling of constriction to the point of There's kind of a threshold, I guess you will. And I think different people have different thresholds for this, but the more restricted you are, it seems like the more likely you are to swing way in the opposite direction as an act of rebellion to that restriction. And so I feel like a lot of, I don't feel, I think, I think a lot of, mm-hmm. The rebellious teenage years is really it's a reaction to the parenting styles of being overly restrictive, never trusting your child. Mm-hmm. And not, right. The

Tali: 12:27

rebellion phase is not a given. Right. It really is dependent on the parenting. Yeah. I really

Cody: 12:31

think it's prompted by the parenting style. And unfortunately I think it's prompted by the parenting style before they're teenagers and then they get to be teenagers and have a bit of strength. Physically and, and mentally to make decisions that are, you know, you can't do when you're six years old. It's like now you've got a driver's license, now you have a peer group and you might have an older friend who can buy you beer or whatever it is. Like you have access to things when you're a teenager that you didn't when you're younger, but parents are still trying to parent as if they're still six years old. You know, like you got, here's your bedtime kind of thing. It's ridiculous. This is just, I really think a universal. Psychological mechanism though, because if you think about like prohibition on substances, you know, if, whether we're talking about the war on drugs or the prohibition of alcohol, it causes crime waves across the nation. Mm-hmm. And some of that is because you're, you're taking what was once freely traded and making it illegal, which means that the value of the item goes up. You've just made it more valuable because you've restricted all the more alluring, restricted supply. So you've made it very lucrative and you've made it so that the only people who are willing to make that money are people who are high risk individuals. And therefore you take what was perhaps a safe trade and put something you could buy in the store. Yeah. And, and put it into criminal organizations. That causes all kinds of violence and, and that kind of thing. That's just how prohibition works in an economic sense. But psychologically, I think there's a lot of validity to think of, like, people want to do this thing even more because they're being told they can't, and they're, it's like, I'm a grown ass adult. Why are you telling me what I can and cannot drink or eat or put in my body or whatever? So there's this societal rebellion as well. Oh, yeah.

Tali: 14:37

Well I think that's what makes macro counting a really appealing option for changing your body composition or trying to get your diet in check is because it really gives a lot of freedom to that individual, like whether they're using a coach or not. But you have, there's nothing that's off the table. It's just the ideas that you have to track closely enough so that you can see how your choices are. Impacting your body, impacting your ability to eat other things. You know, comparing how many calories are in like a couple of beers and, you know, maybe like a lean in green meal. Like, it's gonna be easy to make those decisions the more that you maybe corner yourself because you've like overdone it in an area that you know, wasn't very satiating or doesn't make you feel very good or doesn't, you know, appeal to your goals very well. And so kind of like what you were talking about with parenting and maybe economic restraints, that there is structure, but it also gives freedom. And I think with our client, what we were, you know, I'm talking about, what it made me think about is how, you know, even with this quote unquote restriction, it's opening all kinds of doors. It's pushing you to prep your food ahead of time so that throughout the week you can, you know, go about your business. Things are easier, more efficient. You just grab it, you go. It prompts you probably to cook more as well, which is a great skill to have. Mm-hmm. To think about people not knowing how to cook nowadays is crazy, but I'm sure it's everywhere just because of the convenience of food and what's that like DoorDash, or like whatever is going on these days that I'm sure is really, really nice to have sometimes. But I know for me personally, when I did the paleo diet back in college, you know, everything is, everything you're eating is a whole food. And I had to learn how to. Cook whole foods. Mm-hmm. Otherwise I would just be eating raw vegetables all the time. Mm-hmm. Or it would just be really bland and boring, but it just opens up a whole new world that I think could be really exciting. And a lot of that is just making the decision and like, and seeing the inherent optimism or opportunity in these restrictions. Cuz we talked about in our podcast last week that for progress to be made, it does take diligence. Yeah. You know, it, it does take less sexy, repetitive and structured effort. You know, you can't just wish yourself somewhere and just end up there. Yeah. You know, you absolutely can see where the wind takes you and it could be really interesting, but if you have something particularly in mind for yourself. There are lots of different ways to get there, but I'm gonna assume that they all take intention.

Cody: 17:47

Yeah. Yep. Totally. And not intention in the, in the idea of like, well, I intend to do this one day, but intention in your actions, you know, be very intentional in the movements that you're making and awareness, like all these sort of, it's just all over the, the zeitgeist of our culture right now is like to be more present and to develop awareness and mindfulness, et cetera. All these things, these kind of synonyms that are being thrown out in sort of woowoo ways, but mm-hmm. It's just real, like you have to pay attention to what the hell you're doing. Otherwise, you'll just kind of get, you know, there's one thing to about, like, you know, go with the flow and see where the wind takes you kind of thing. But the thing about acting like water and. Like going with the flow is that you'll end up at the lowest spot. I mean, interesting. You know, you kinda have to realize that you have choices and not making a choice is a choice. And so you can't make a quality choice unless it's an informed choice. Sure. And so to be informed, you also have to be aware and consciously aware and and analytical and at least know what the hell you're doing. I

19:06

love

Tali: 19:06

how water in a lot of forms is used as an analogy for different dynamics. Mm-hmm. I think about like that time that my mom was talking about differences in religion and how they're all streams mm-hmm. And how they all kind of can run parallel in their own validity, but kind of. Either start from the same source or end at the same place. I can't quite remember. Mm-hmm. And then thinking about, you know, there are folks who think like life is like swimming upstream, you know, and that's like a real thing that happens in nature with salmon, you know, things like that. And I remember for before my weightlifting meets, I had been reminded by a friend to be like, water. And I think it was a Bruce Lee quote. Gosh, we'll have to link to it. Cause I, I don't really remember. Do you?

Cody: 20:01

Yeah. Well, I don't remember the whole quote. He's like giving a little speech in an interview kind of thing. But I wish

Tali: 20:05

I could remember what it is, and I don't really remember what it was supposed to mean, but it was very useful at the time. I remember that. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I think it had something to do with like, trusting your body to some degree. Mm-hmm. And allowing yourself to kind of like roll with the punches in a way. Because in weightlifting. It can be, it can be looked at as you kind of like dominating the bar or like telling the bar where to go, which these are things that we actually say in the sport to like inspire maybe more aggression or more speed or power, whatever it is. Mm-hmm. However, the more you can work with the bar and the more adaptable you can be from position moment to moment the more successful you'll be. Mm-hmm. And that takes being incredibly present in a very short timeframe. Yeah. Well,

Cody: 21:02

there's a couple of analogies to that zen philosophy which is where Bruce Lee was getting all that was from Zen and Ed as far as weightlifting within the movement. You know, something I learned early on from like Coach Bergner and those guys in CrossFit that were kind of heading up the weightlifting program was to move around the bar. Like the bar should not move around you. Mm-hmm. That bar should be traveling on an efficient path and you're moving your body around it. Totally. So that's kind of a zen sort of philosophy

Tali: 21:35

and as an onlooker you would not realize that's what happened. Yeah. Those like, it probably looks very

Cody: 21:40

similar. Looks crazy. Yeah. But the Slowmo videos are great to watch that. It's so cool to just watch that bar. Just having this like smooth path and this athlete's body bending around it and curving around and landing or, you know, landing under it in that receiving position that's in alignment with where the bar already wanted to go. It's Oh yeah. So cool to see.

Tali: 22:03

Well, and it can, that, that position or like that meeting of the athlete in the bar can always be better. Yeah. Yeah. It can always happen sooner. It can always happen. Higher or whatever. But I do remember at a point being conscious enough within my lifts, and I think of snatches specifically cuz they were, they were, I knew it was gonna come to fitness at some point. Snatches specifically because it's such a quick and fluid movement. But it also wasn't my best event. I had a tendency to just like throw them behind me. But I remember getting to a point where I would be able to cho correct within the lift. So even though generally the movement pattern would be the same each time, slightly more weight or, you know, being a little bit nervous or whatever, like can make all kinds of changes to what. You're doing to that bar. And I remember being able to correct those things within the lift, which is incredible to do. Yeah. Because there's kind of a feeling sometimes that as soon as that bar leaves the floor, like, well, let's see what happens. You know, because it all happens so fast. Oh, yeah. And like your adrenaline is like off the charts. And if it's really heavy, then yeah. But that presence is, it's a really incredible feeling and it's really hard to coach. I'm like, gosh, when, when do you squeeze this sort of stuff in? And I think that's why we have a podcast about it, because it's all in there. It's just like implementing it is, I haven't figured out how to do it. Yeah. Yeah.

Cody: 23:39

Well, I feel like the other zen aspect of the weightlifting is within, like, say the competition, which you've talked about before. You've touched on recently where if you miss, if you miss a lift, like as soon as. As soon as you get a red card and you've missed the lift, it's over. It's in the past that

Tali: 24:00

nevermind. Sorry, what? Red card? Yeah. Well whatever lights you were just watching, bend it like Beckham last weekend. So,

Cody: 24:08

so the point being though is that the moment it's done, it's literally in the past, so you don't, it does not need to affect your attitude for the next lift. Oh yeah. That's up to you to be affected or not affected by it. And so if you're kind of in that zen allow things to happen sort of presence, then maybe you can approach the next lift as if this is my first lift. Even if it's your third attempt, it's the only one you have. Well, so it's the one.

Tali: 24:37

And that can kind of appeal to the abundance idea too, in terms of like, you're obviously narrowing your chances for a total when you're missing lifts. Mm-hmm. Like that if it's straight out of the gate, but. I think also just being able to like, let go of those lifts and not let them intimidate you or, you know, get into your head for the next lift. Like, it has nothing to do with what you're gonna do from here on out with your life, so. Yep. You know, letting it go is really in your best interest. And I think leaning into an abundant ideas, like you get, you can like re you can like put all of your energy into the next lift, like Yeah. Rather than feeling a certain loss mm-hmm. At that point. Yeah.

Cody: 25:25

Interesting. You can kind of shift your goals depending on where you ended up. So, you know, maybe your goal going into the meat was six for six. Mm-hmm. And then you miss one and it's like, well, You know, let's see if I can place on the snatch and then you miss another one. It's like, let's see if I can, let's total, let's total. Yeah. And that's your new, your new objective. And there's nothing wrong with that. No. And you can keep, you can keep doing that. Like maybe by the end of the meet you're, it's like, well, I showed up, you know, and it's like, yeah.

Tali: 25:56

I think that's all so celebratory. Yeah. I think it's worth celebrating all of those things because it's easy for like the tiniest things to defeat us, like in any given arena or any given moment. And, you know, we might not always set ourselves up perfectly to have success or the best outcomes, but we also have. The opportunity to change course all the time. And that's what I'm always talking about when it comes to creativity, is that there's room, or we're creating a situation where we can choose how we wanna move forward. Mm-hmm. And that to me is creativity, not feeling beholden to my default. Or, you know, if someone said something that bothered me, like, is my whole day gonna be ruined? You know? Right. Being able to think about it differently or even address it or something, you know, that could transform the experience. To me, that's an opportunity for creativity. And that's really something that excites me about that coaching call that we had earlier today is that she's starting to see how, oh, this really major change in my life that feels really different to me and maybe I. Restrictive at times actually gives me a lot of opportunity. Yeah. And that's so cool. I was staying in the car after like, gosh, I wish all of our clients were like this. Mm-hmm. Because I feel like that kind of stuff we're trying to constantly make clients aware of, of like, this is an amazing opportunity for yourself. Like, and you've done so much to even just show up here and be open to the it's ideas. But for somebody to be coming up with them on their own and reflecting that back to us is super exciting. It makes me feel like we have the right, we're like sending out the right messages or we have the right infrastructure and the methods that we're using to inspire that. Mm-hmm. So that's really cool. Hmm.

Cody: 27:59

Yeah. Yeah. You know, just one more analogy I think to what we're talking about is when you and I first got on a fairly strict budget and how freeing that was, it wasn't restrictive, it was freeing because you know, it felt restrictive maybe at first. But then when we realized we had a gap in our budget to where all of our needs were taken care of, and then all of our sort of recurring wants were taken care of, and then we had a little money left over, we could use that money however we wanted, guilt free. It felt like, ah, you know, you don't have to worry about it. Mm-hmm. There's no stress around it. And there was so it was. Sort of a, a framing of the idea of being disciplined and sort of quote unquote restrictive with money actually gave us an abundance feeling where we could go out and enjoy dinner and not be stressed out about the money we were spending having dinner out. Well, I'm glad

Tali: 28:56

that you brought up money because I actually have like a few ideas around money and I actually didn't write that one down, so that's definitely a good point. And you know, there are times where we've been like, really flush with money and it's uncomfortable for me. Mm-hmm.

Cody: 29:12

Because it's not being directed.

Tali: 29:13

It's not being directed. And like there wasn't that like deep satisfaction of like everything in life being taken care of because I think sometimes when we have more than we need, it's easy to. Be like misguided or like that money to be allocated in different ways. Mm-hmm. Then maybe we would want it to, because it's like, oh yeah, it's always gonna be there. But in a way that's an abundance mindset too. Like one of my notes here is like, money is always out there to be made. Oh yeah. You know, and that's something that like both of us have really struggled with our beliefs around money and our, you know, family history with money. And so there's a lot that needs undoing, but it's really easy. Like if you grow up with not a lot of money or you're, you yourself have not had a lot of money, it's really easy to kind of spiral into the scarcity mindset. And less about like how much money you actually have, but your ability to get it. You know, that's been a hangup of mine for a long time being like, wow, I'm just like one of those people who like, doesn't. Know what I'm doing or I'm not doing the right things to like get money. Yeah. There's

Cody: 30:29

something I wanted to talk about about that, which is this, we have this bias. I think there's actually a psychological bias that's named, like, I think there's a name for what I'm trying to describe, but I don't know. It, it's this idea though where we feel like we are who we are as sort of a a permanence to who we are. And that really goes against a, an abundance mindset in the, especially with things like money or relationships. I've, I've heard people talk about this in relationship, like destined to be alone, or I Mm, mm-hmm. I have a bad picker. You know, I've always picked these A-holes or whatever. It's like, well, you're right, you're right

Tali: 31:13

because you keep saying it, you're like, it's like a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Cody: 31:16

Right. And that's what I was trying to get at. It's like I, if you say, well, I. Could never, or I, I can't be a millionaire cuz I don't have the, the qualities that it takes to do that. The answer is, you are, you're right. You're, you're absolutely right. You don't have those qualities. That does not mean that the five year from now version of you lacks those qualities. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Like you can change. The qualities about yourself that are needed to have the abundance that you desire.

Tali: 31:45

I did hear some of that podcast you were listening to earlier, cuz this kind of reminds me of, there was an anecdote about like some kids saying he hated olives. Yeah. And whoever is in the show, I don't Who are you listening to?

Cody: 31:57

I'll link to it. It's a Tim Ferris podcast. Okay. And I've, I'm spacing on the guest's name, but he's a recurring guest. He's been on there a lots, they're

Tali: 32:05

friends and okay. Yeah. Is that who was telling the story? Yeah. So he says that his son says, I, I hate olives, like forever and always or something. And he is like, today, today you hate olives. Yeah. And to instill that in a child of like, you have the potential to be an entirely different person with different preferences, different capabilities I think is so rad cuz gosh, how long? Yeah. I feel like most of us are like kind of a, a little late to that party. Yeah.

Cody: 32:33

Well it's like when you say, this is something that I tried to break the habit of when I was very young, I heard it. You know, I, I'm kind of a business leadership seminar junkie. I mean, I've hundreds and hundreds and like a wall full of books on these kind of things. And one of the things that was expressed is to not tell your kids we can't afford that or, We're broke and things like that because you're just reinforcing this as if it's a permanent situation. You know, you can say did you

Tali: 33:03

say right now like,

Cody: 33:04

tack that onto the end? Well, you can say not, you know, right now, or we don't need that now, but it would be cool to get that later on, you know, or something like that. And let me, let's put a plan together if you want that toy. You know, like there's a whole lot of things that you can tell your child besides, we can't afford that honey. And Derek Sivers, I just wanted to put that on. Theres, he's the guest on that podcast I'll link to. Well but I think that's a really valuable way of thinking in that, that there's fluidity in our life and to say that I don't have this or I don't have these qualities. That may be a true statement, but you're putting permanence on it when you're using it as an excuse to not try. Totally.

Tali: 33:44

And I even have a real life example that just happened today. You and I stopped at the sports corral because I told you there was a pair of jeans that I wanted to try on. Mm-hmm. And It's my favorite pair of jeans. I've bought them a million times, but my legs rubbed together so I often blow holes in my pants. So I buy them a lot. Anyway, we went to go to try on the jeans and they were on sale. Yay. And they were the last pair in my size range because they're actually one size too small. And you know, I was really conflicted like walking around the store like, do these look good? Should I just get them? And you were like really supportive of that because I know, you know that clothing shopping not only is an excitement for me, but like it also causes a lot of woes for me as well. And I. Probably I was like definitely leaning in at a point to being like, oh my God, this is like a good opportunity. Like who knows if I'll have extra money later to spend on this. Like, so I should do it now because they're on sale and they're right here and you know, maybe that means I'll save money tomorrow when I go shopping with my friends out of town. And and then I'm not exactly sure like what came over me, but I think you had a, a part to play in this when you said like, well if you don't find something tomorrow, like come back. Mm-hmm. Like you can get them then. And you know, when I get my mindset on something, it's really hard for me to let it go. Yeah, me too. And I was really excited that moment. And I even said after when we were in the car, like that was actually a moment for me. Like I was able to just like trust that something better will come along. Mm-hmm. I don't have to settle. That's what you said. You don't have to settle. And that's a really important feature, I think when we're talking about abundance versus scarcity is like what you were talking about with, you know, being broke or saying you can't afford things is there's, there's this acceptance sometimes of like, this is just what it's, this is what it is. Mm-hmm. An abundance mindset is leaning into possibility, into things that we really don't know. Yeah. But gosh, what that does for us, just to simply think Yeah,

Cody: 36:03

it's, or open ourselves up to, it's tough to develop that on your own, but I think through experience, if you're paying attention and, and you're making efforts, you can develop this sense of trust in yourself. You might use the word faith, but it doesn't need to be sort of a religious connotation, but just a trust that it, you're gonna be, You're capable and you're fine, you know, you're able to take care of yourself. This kind of sort of came over me probably in my late thirties, early forties, by the time I felt this confidence because a loss of a job felt like the end of the fucking world. Like, oh my God, what am I gonna do? And now it's like, it's to the point where it's not stressful at all for me anymore. I've completely let that go. You know, just to give a really personal analogy, I don't think you'd mind me sharing. The, these kind of personal details, but we, we kinda have a nest egg of money at one point from, you know, through the pandemic and all that restrictions like the, we had ever had. And Most I ever had personally. And, and we had an agreement of like, okay, if it gets down, be below this certain point, then I'm gonna go get a job. We're trying to figure out a business plan, but if we run out of time to get the business plan and get things going, then I'll just go get a job. And it was kind of getting right down to the wire and I never was very stressed out about it. And

Tali: 37:28

what, well, you talked about thresholds earlier and we have different thresholds when it comes to that, right?

Cody: 37:33

We do. But I guess my point is, is that it was kind of like no big deal. I'm like, jobs are everywhere. People are having a hard time getting employees enough employees. So I went out and literally the first place I walked into, I got a text later that day that they wanted me to come in the next day to start work. Right. You know, it was like, it was not, it was like, yep. I kind of figured that's what would happen. And then fast forward a year, we decided I'm gonna quit that job to go, you know, to try to launch the business. And we had a certain timeframe in order to do that, and it's kinda like getting right down to the wire. And then this month is probably about a month later than we really wanted it to happen, as far as our savings timeline. Mm-hmm. Maybe two months later. But here we are. I've, you know, we, our business now has matched the income that I was making at that job. Right. And it just ha, it just happens, you know, you don't have to think of everything as being stagnant. Like, Ooh, I'm unemployed. Our savings is dwindling. Our savings is dwindling. And that's the reality that you're living in. It's like, well, yeah, but we're probably gonna make more money. A couple months from now, before it's gone, before the savings is gone. And sometimes you just have to have an abundance mindset to, to know that resources are always available.

Tali: 38:57

Well, and I think you, like, I know I need a slap in the face when we get into situations like that to be reminded of that abundance mindset. Because I think about even the agreement that we made about our savings, getting down to a certain point before we made any moves to get jobs or mm-hmm. And, you know, the job thing, like when I think about like you getting a job, it's not, it's more about like, you're gonna be gone all day. We won't see each other. We will be more tired when we do see each other. And there's all this stretch of time that we're not communicating and that's not really ideal for us and like what we had in mind for our life together. And so, You know, all of that comes to mind when it's like, I don't wanna get to that point where you have to get a job, because I know that we're gonna be entering in that phase of life. Yeah. And that's not really where we like to be. But that whole suggestion about getting down to a certain wire, that was just something that was modeled for me when my mom tried to start her business or launch her business. And she did. But it, I don't think it was profitable enough. Soon enough. Soon enough. And you know, as an outsider it was like, gosh darn, I wish you like, kept with it. Yeah. Because, I mean, I don't know enough about my family's finances. We are working on being more open about that kind of stuff. Mm-hmm. Because the more illusion and secret and like closed off it is, we're not helping each other. Mm-hmm. Like, it's not teaching anybody anything. And I know that's something that's really important to my family. To be collaborative in that way. But, you know, money is one of those things that people feel weird talking about. Yeah. And so I have it in my head like, okay, well even if you weren't profiting, like I'm gonna assume that you were still in a financial position that you could have kept going. And, you know, that was hard for me to see to, you know, see her go back to a job. Mm-hmm. You know, and kind of like put her dreams on the shelf for a moment. And I, you know, here she is, like resurging it again mm-hmm. A couple years later. And so it's kind of like what we were talking about shopping where, you know, maybe it's a not right now thing but. I think it's, you need to have some people in your corner to like remind you of that. Yeah. Like you and I have a tendency to flip flop sometimes, like when I'm losing my shit and I'm like, everything's like falling apart. What are we gonna do? You have this way of like seeing it all so clearly in the moment and reminding me of all the good things that we've got going on and all the things that are on their way and all the potential. Yeah, absolutely. And then when you are in that position, it's so easy for me to, to see all of those good qualities too. Yeah. Yeah. But I'm sure just like anything else, it just takes practice. Yeah. That's like, there are probably many opportunities throughout the day Yeah. To do so.

Cody: 42:01

I mean, that's what I was saying is I, I think it takes practice because I felt so when I was younger Yeah, it was just so devastating to lose a job or to not be able to pay a bill. It just felt like, how are we ever gonna change this situation? And looking back, I'm like, man, I feel like I was making it way harder than it needed to be because I realized at the time I had little kids and it's a big, you know, it's a different thing when you're trying to like feed a family of five on one person working and the other one in, you know, in the home helping raise kids and all that. So circumstances were different, but still I think my maturity was a problem because I had this fear of, I let fear really dictate a lot of my actions. And so rather than be creative, I would go get more jobs, you know, and working two or three jobs and restrict yourself

Tali: 42:50

further. Yeah. To that point of pain, which we talked about last week. Like, there are ways to get traction that you're not digging yourself a hole. Yeah,

Cody: 43:00

yeah, yeah. Yeah. Not everything has to suck for it to ru ruts or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. But I kind of wanted to bring that up is that this idea of abundance mindset is very closely related to the idea of just having faith that in, or confidence in yourself, like building that confidence because I've seen people, it just kinda breaks my heart when I see so many people. This is such a common story that it's almost the ma, I mean, it's a vast majority of our society is working in jobs that they hate. I'm like, why are you doing that? Like, what I can see doing it for six months a year, it's a, it's a phase. It's, it's an emergency situation. You gotta pay some shit. You gotta, you know, get your stuff together, you get a rhythm. But why are you doing that for 15 years straight? Like, you have the option to do something else. You're just telling yourself you don't. Sure, but that's speaking. You're telling yourself, well, I don't have the skills. Well, then go get the skills. Like, if you wanna change your job, spend one hour every day. Studying something else that is more in line with the thing you wanna do, you know? Well that's, start developing small practices and making moves to change who you are.

Tali: 44:13

Well, that's the thing about abundance is that it's, it's trying to illuminate opportunities and pathways and resources to you. But if you're in a scarcity mindset, you can't see it. Mm-hmm. You really can't see it. And I remember, I think it was the, you're a badass or you're a badass with money. One of those books, Jen Sincero. Yeah. She said, I remember there was something about like the color red or the color yellow. And like training yourself to see those things if you're conscious of it. Mm-hmm. And then all these things will show themselves, like to whatever you decided to pay attention to. And that's exactly it. It's a decision to. Make yourself aware of those things. Oh yeah. I mean, if you're not aware of this idea between abundance and scarcity, sure. You might be at the mercy of like whatever the fuck you're feeling. Yeah. Or external circumstances. But yeah, step one is like having agency self two is like advocating for that agency and like Yeah. You know, trying to see pathways that you can work with. Mm-hmm. And just the last thing that I wanted to say about money is is it Dave Ramsey I was talking about earlier today? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Who said that? Or one of his pillars of like, financial freedom is to share your wealth. Yeah. And to be generous with it. And I think generosity is in and of itself could be a topic of this conversation, just because I know that sharing things like material things has been something that I have only. Leaned into more recently in life. Mm-hmm. I love you so much, sister, but I'm just thinking about like growing up with a sister where like we would take each other's things or ruin each other's things and I became kind of like greedy mm-hmm. As a result. Mm-hmm. I don't think it's solely because of you, Doria. I love you. But I think that that's kind of the first example that comes to my mind. You know, we grew up together, those lessons are potent and you know, lately I've been really excited about like, giving gifts on people's birthdays or Yeah. You know, we were talking about giving. These clients of ours who have really helped us generate more business. Like give them a thank you and like treat them to a dinner out. And that definitely appeals to an abundant mindset because if you weren't, you would be kind of scrooger and hoarding. Yeah. All of your resources. And there's something about not being frivolous with money, but like, feeling free with money that is tapping into that feeling. Oh yeah. But it's tricky because I have also tapped into that feeling before and like run myself into horrible situations. Yeah. I was, I put on there not really sure exactly how to differentiate the two, so, sorry. Yeah.

Cody: 47:09

I, I put on here act in abundance, but not fool, hearty, you know, like you can't be foolish. Like you have to kind of know. Kind of comes back to this whole conscious awareness thing. You have to know where you're at and you know, I, I think everybody should have a budget, whether you're a billionaire or you're barely scraping by. When you have to have your bases covered, you know, you have to know. Yeah. You have to know where you're at and what you're doing. And I, and, and I, I really believe that that's true for anything that you want to have progress or stability in your life, is to be consciously aware of it. That's why I'm so big on journaling or tracking your food, or tracking your workouts, tracking your reps, like. People, I get so much pushback from people I don't wanna track, I don't wanna track. It's like, well, how do you, how are you ever gonna know if you're making progress, if you're not measuring anything? Mm-hmm. You have to, you have to. If, if you want to make progress, if it's just a floating down stream situation, then okay, but don't expect to get somewhere that you want to go. Coaching isn't really

Tali: 48:11

about that.

Cody: 48:11

Yeah. So yeah, I didn't get sidetracked. Oh yeah. So the, the abundance thing, I, I really think that you can train your brain to acknowledge that there's abundance for you by being generous. And I was just thinking of even a smaller example, which is, Something that I still have to, every once in a while remind myself of is like tipping. I'm a generous tipper. I love to tip 20% as sort of a standard, and they, they, I'm an 18 percenter. Well, like, they kind of have to provide shitty service to get less than 20 from me. It's not the other way around. But there's a, that's great. There's also this sort of, well I've, I've waited to, you've waited tables, we've, we know what it's like to be in those jobs, but I've

Tali: 48:56

never waited tables where I earned my own tips though. Well, yeah, I have, I was always in a pool sort of situation, so Yeah,

Cody: 49:03

I have, and it's disappointing when you go like above and beyond and you're just working your butt off and the people are like really nice and digging it and you're, you know, have fun conversations and they're ordering expensive drinks and they're just running up this tab and then you get a tip that's like 5% and you're like, motherfucker, I have to pay taxes on that 5%. Like, yeah, that's insane. It's so, I've just always been a, a generous tipper, but. There's this

Tali: 49:27

curious, sorry, just before you move on, when you're getting takeout, what's your tipping philosophy?

Cody: 49:33

So that's another example of like, do I need to be stingy about this? Like, why not? Like why not give him a tip? So I always give a tip, but it's probably more like 10 or 12% to the kid. Cuz I know a lot of those situations, they're sharing it with the kitchen staff. It's like they did the same work that they would have without the waiter involved, just cuz I'm grabbing it and taking it to go. So anyway, I just, I don't know. It's something I enjoy doing. But there's this sort of meme going around like a cultural meme, if you will, of how ridiculous it is that you can't buy a coffee nowadays with a, without a tip screen being shoved in your face. It's like, do I really need to tip you? How is that different? I'm just, let me get to it. Sorry. I'm So, it's like this meme of like It's ridiculous to have to tip on a cup of coffee. Like all they did was pour a cup of coffee and hand it to you. Do they deserve an extra buck for that? And I'm like, the, the, the other question is, is a dollar so critical to you that you're gonna miss it? I like, are you gonna think if you give a dollar to the barista, are you gonna think about that two days later? Like, oh man, I could really use that dollar now. Like, if that's the case, you probably should not be going out for fucking coffee, like brew your own at home and take, you don't have to tip no one if you do it at home. Yeah. I mean, you get a whole pot of coffee for the, for the price of one cup. So that, I thought about that just the other day. I had this weird thing where it's like, man, dude, I really need a tip for the freaking coffee. And then I was like, Cody, you're not gonna miss this dollar. No one's gonna fucking notice this dollar, but. They will notice, they will notice the a hundred people that they've helped out today and have a hundred dollars worth of tips at the end of the day that's, that's meaningful for them and it's meaning less to me. So why not just give them the dollar and know that I, I'm fine. I'm gonna be fine. Yes. And if you

Tali: 51:30

were like in a position where you were maybe needing to cut back on some things and like make coffee on your own you know, sure. Lean into that. But if you are getting service from somebody else, like that is a a more favorable exchange. Yeah, A good will exchange.

Cody: 51:50

Yeah, for sure. But I think that there's some important psychology there for the person who's giving the money, because if you're getting in this habit where you're having an argument with yourself over a dollar like. There's, that's that scarcity mindset. It is. And y it's a practice. Just like so many things that we talk about are, are a practice. You know, I, I love to look at personality traits and emotions as practices. They're skills. You know, people think of, well, that's just who I am, that kind of thing. It's like, well, have you tried to not be that? Ouch. But things like gratitude for instance. Yeah. You know, you don't just feel grateful cuz something good happened to you. You can actually feel grateful because you practice feeling grateful. Like you make a daily practice of intentionally looking for things to be grateful for. And it helps you to be someone who's more grateful in general. You, these are practices and an abundance mindset is the same thing. You can practice having opportunities come your way because you're seeing opportunity everywhere. If you're the type of person who gives that, go ahead and give the dollar tip 20%. Or what were the other examples you were talking about? Just like, oh, like giving thank you a gift card to somebody as a thank you. Mm-hmm. You know, these kind of things are training your brain also. It's a practice of being in abundance and thinking about the world in an abundant way. Yeah. So I think generosity is a huge part of developing the, the mindset around abundance.

Tali: 53:33

So I wrote this note that kind of feels like a, a segue from what you just said, but people who are minimalists is at a byproduct of an abundant. Mindset.

Cody: 53:46

Funny, I was thinking about this during that podcast that I was listening to again, okay. With Derek Sivers, where he is a super minimalist cuz they were joking about the fact that Tim Ferris like, went over to his house and they're having scotch while they're on the podcast. They're like drinking scotch. And he's like, you have three glasses in the house. That's all he has is three glasses. And then he is got a couple bamboo ones for his kids so that he doesn't break the glass glasses. That's it. That's all he has. And so he's like, so they don't entertain often. He's like this super, right? He's like this super minimalist guy. And what I was thinking is, it's kind of funny, my, my dad's the opposite of a minimalist. Yes. My parents are a bit hor like hoarders. Not to a degree of. Like it's not gross. It's not outrageously disgusting. Like the, the TV show hoarders, they don't like hoard cats or anything like that. Yeah, there's like not, yeah, there's not, yeah, it's, it's not to that extreme, but it's way over our threshold. Like way over. Oh yeah. So there's kind of like piles of shit everywhere that we're trying to like clean up around the property here. The property's, just for those of you who are just tuning in, this property's been in the family for like four generations of people who held onto a lot of shit. So my great-grandfather bought it in the forties. And you think of those generations, it's kind of a cliche, like, well, if you lived through the depression, you don't throw anything away, cuz it might be valuable one day and. It kind of got me thinking about this whole idea of minimalism is sort of like a new rich situation. You kind of have to have a lot of privilege in order to think in minimalist terms because that means you have no storage for food, for instance, no backup, you know, clothes of different size because you can always go get it. Yeah. Cuz eh, I can always go get whatever I need whenever I want it kind of attitude. Interesting. And to be a minimalist means that you're not storing things for a time when you might need it in the future. So in a way being minimalist is a little bit more of an abundance mindset and it's almost like the new, it's almost like the opposite. You know, it used to be people who had a lot of stuff were rich people cuz they had, they had a lot of stuff and now I think it's kind of flip flopped. We are inundated with stuff in our country like, I mean, I've seen homeless encampments where they have like piles of stuff, you know, everywhere. And it's like, but that's because they, they might need it. They might need like these piles of coats to survive the winter. Like they're desperate. And so people who are minimalists who have one coat, you know, two pairs of shoes, three glasses in their house, you know, those kind of things. It's kind of a, a symbol of, it's almost like a status symbol if you think of it that way. That is so

Tali: 56:48

interesting. Yeah.

Cody: 56:50

Kind of counterintuitive, but it's almost like it rich.

Tali: 56:52

But it came up. Yeah, it came up because I know that greed as I have like, Maybe been a little too critical of myself, but like that feeling of like, wanting to keep everything that's mine mm-hmm. And not give it away. Or like recently I just went through like my makeup drawer and normally I would wanna sell the things that I don't use anymore. But I actually went around to all the people at my work being like, do you want this? Like, nice, just, do you want it? And I felt really good about that. But there's something about greed that, you know, that goes along with accumulating things. Mm-hmm. Or just having a strong hold on something. And the idea of abundance is like that faith that you were talking about. Mm-hmm. And that's a letting go of sort of sorts.

Cody: 57:42

Yeah, absolutely. I was thinking of that when I was cleaning out the basement yesterday and going through and it's like, well, We could get rid of that and that and that and that and that. And then I was remembering that some of those things I was pointing at getting rid of are things that I advocated for saving two years ago. Well, when

Tali: 57:58

you offered to get rid of the couch that has been in your family for like a hundred years. Yeah, I was shocked. Like I work, I even told people like Cody said that he wants to get rid of the couch. I didn't say it. I'm sure you know that I feel that way. Mm-hmm. Because I'm not delicate with my desires to purge. But the fact that it came from you was major. Like I know that something shifted because I think you know very well that like relationships or good memories do not have to be tied to things and Yeah. You know, there are things that I have that are very precious to me and I know I also have an abundance of things that are. Of high value, but like, maybe don't have a sentiment to me. Mm-hmm. And there's a lot to unpack there, I think, but especially if it's like something that takes up space or you can't use it, or it looks like hell, you know, like to have those feelings of like, I'm ready to let this go, I think is really healthy.

Cody: 59:09

Yeah. And I, I think it really is in line with the abundance mindset though. Like, I'm feeling really optimistic and I'm trying to surround myself with like-minded people who have an abundance mindset. And so it's easy for me to go down to the basement and look at these tables and be like, yeah, we might use that one day, but we might not. And I don't want to store it in the meantime. In the meantime.

Tali: 59:32

Yeah. And so if we, because the meantime is really precious.

Cody: 59:35

Yeah. And so it's like, well, if I need an end table, In the future that I don't have now, I'll fucking buy it. Like I, let's just have the faith that we can afford an end table if we need fun on.

Tali: 59:45

Well, you're giving yourself credit too. Yeah. In that moment. Like, it's cool. I'll be able to handle that in the future. Yeah. When it's time. Yeah. But there's something about hanging on to that stuff, that scarcity mindset that, like, you are, you're not giving yourself credit. Yeah. That's my, you're not putting, putting faith in yourself. Yeah. That's my point. Yeah. I think that's really fascinating.

Cody: 1:00:06

Yeah. And of course I think there needs to be a bit of a balance, because that doesn't mean to be shortsighted either. You know? It's fool hearty to not prepare for anything that could go wrong in the future. You know, whether it's, whether it's insurance or a little bit of food supply on hand. Or, you know, I like, there's this, preppers get a, a bad rap as being sort of these paranoid people who are like preparing for the end of the world or whatever, but it's like, you know, If something like Mount St. Helen's blows up and the whole city is covered in ash for a week and you can't drive, those preppers are looking kind of smart now. They have food. They don't have to go to the grocery store and fight for people stealing stuff out of their grocery cart. I mean, I've had,

Tali: 1:00:56

that was so nuts during Covid.

Cody: 1:00:58

My God. Well, I have, I mean, even before Covid people act this way, especially in the cities where we had, we had a snowstorm that was supposed to come through Portland and remember it was like my normal shopping day and you were like working a double. On a Friday and I had like a half a Friday off or something like that. So I was doing the grocery shopping on my own. Is this when someone stole your carts? Yeah, this was like the normal shopping day for us. So I wasn't out there because of this impending doom. I was just out there cuz it was Friday and that's when we did our shopping. So I was in WinCo doing our shopping, but the weather forecast was, oh, it's supposed to snow tonight and the whole city's gonna be like on lockdown tomorrow and better stock up. And I was, it was absolutely insane. There were lines from the checkout to the back of the store and this is a huge store? Oh yeah. WinCo. It's like a huge fucking warehouse. So there were lines in the dairy aisle Wow. Of WinCo, which is at the very back, wrapping around the side of the store, up to the checkout. Oh, it was like insane and just people just swiping stuff off of, of shelves and running. It was like madness.

Tali: 1:02:04

It's like the Easter egg hunt that we saw. It was

Cody: 1:02:06

madness. And I, I got to almost done with the shopping of this freaking nightmare. Like, I don't know why I didn't just leave, but I I, I know why we didn't leave cuz we had a tiny little fridge at the time. So we, we didn't, oh yeah, if you're outta food, you're outta food. If you're outta food, you're outta food. So I was just like, okay, I've got, I gotta get this done. So but I had forgotten like one piece of produce and so I just left my cart because it was so crowded in there were this people everywhere. So I left my cart and ran back and got this one piece of produce and came back to my cart and half the shit in my cart was gone. People had just grabbed stuff out of my cart. This is madness. And then to top it all off, there was no snow. It was like a false report. The snow never happened. So all these people were acting like a-holes just disgusting animals for no reason at all. It's just this sense of fear and

Tali: 1:03:02

scarcity mindset. Yeah. I mean we've even appealed to it in marketing, you know, or for, I know I've done it with clients, like I only have one spot left. Yeah, I actually have a few. I like creating scarcity fucking works cuz people are, you're tapping into like that animalistic. Yeah, and

Cody: 1:03:20

I really try to worry honest with that. When I signed up a couple of clients ago, I was like, I. Yeah, I wasn't really gonna take out any clients, but I'll take you on and that'll probably be it. But then our priorities shifted and I decided I needed more so I wasn't lying. But at the same time, yeah, it creating scarcity is a marketing tactic that people use all the time. Mm-hmm. You know, only three spots in only

Tali: 1:03:41

three spots. Or call the next five minutes.

Cody: 1:03:43

Yeah, exactly.

Tali: 1:03:43

Yeah. Yeah. That I used to love watching infomercials. I discovered them I think, in middle school and like I could just watch them for hours. FOMO is, that's so entertaining. Yeah.

Cody: 1:03:52

FOMO is a real thing. Yeah. Yeah. And getting back to that abundance mindset, I've been trying to really resist fomo, cuz I'm guilty of it as well. Like, oh, I gotta sign up for this seminar. I gotta take this class now and I gotta jump on this deal, or get these tickets ahead of time while they're on sale so I can save$5. Well, we also

Tali: 1:04:13

did that today. We're like, let's get these tickets while we have money. Yeah. You know? Yeah.

Cody: 1:04:18

So, yeah, I think there's definitely a balance of not acting foolishly. You know, having, having a cupboard full of food is not make you crazy. I don't think that you have to be a minimalist, but at the same time, hoarding in the off chance that someday you might need this thing and you're never gonna be in a financial position to replace it, especially when it's something that you could sell at a yard sale for 10 bucks. It's like, do you, how if you could sell that table for$10 at a yard sale, that also means you could just buy that table for 10 bucks at somebody else's yard sale. So do you really need to hold onto it?

Tali: 1:04:53

You're making me feel like I should go through my jewelry. It's hard. There's also, I would say that's like my hardiest area of life jewelry. Yeah. Yeah. I really like it. But I really don't wear very much jewelry at any given time. Not these days. It's just I have like grand ideas like design-wise and I'm like, oh, that goes with this. I should probably be channeling that into someone else, like to be someone's stylist or whatever, have a fashion blog or something. Cuz I have a lot of opinions about those things. Mm-hmm. I don't necessarily care to own them though. Yeah. But owning them seems to be the only way they interact with it. Not great for the wallet, not great for how much space we have. But it's something to think about.

Cody: 1:05:43

Something to think about. Yeah. So I think that one of the most valuable things about developing an abundance mindset is not just for your own personal sense of security and faith, you know, faith and like less stress and all that. But it also literally presents opportunities. Mm-hmm. Because you're aware of opportunity and There's an example I'll give that could be politically charged, but it doesn't matter what your opinion is on the oil industry or oil or gas and energy and the planet and all this, it's has nothing to do with what I'm saying. Okay. But as an analogy, in the seventies, there was this, you know, period where they thought, oh, we're running out of oil. And so there was gas rationing and you know, you could only go to the pumps on odd days if you had this license plate or even days on that license plate, and that could be Oh wow. And there was this big scare around the world's oil supplies. And then a couple technologies came along, fuel injection, replaced carburetors. So all of a sudden you doubled the gas mileage of every car on the road. And then fracking became a technology where they could get very small deposits of Petroleum products out of the ground. Mm-hmm. That were not accessible before because of the new technology. And that's something that we kind of forget is like, just because something isn't feasible now doesn't mean it's never gonna be feasible.

Tali: 1:07:17

What's the saying? Something is the, the mother of invention, is it scarcity?

Cody: 1:07:23

No, I think it's it's pretty like need is the mother of invention. I don't think so. I think, I think exploration is the mother of invention, but I Can I be

Tali: 1:07:32

scarcity? I'm gonna gimme your

Cody: 1:07:34

phone. Ask Chachi p t what is the mother of invention? Ew.

Tali: 1:07:42

That was such an automatic response though. I should really think about that cuz I don't necessarily feel that way about chat g p T It just feels it just, it's a little wiggy at times, but I see the opportunity. Mm-hmm.

Cody: 1:07:58

Well I guess my point is that progress is made by people who have an abundance mindset because they're not worried about what can't be done today. The thinking about what could be done tomorrow. Necessity

Tali: 1:08:09

is the mother of

Cody: 1:08:09

invention. Yes. Which I disagree with. You do. Yeah. Because all that's necessary is food and shelter, but somehow humans have built spacecraft, you know, like that wasn't necessary. The most invention, I think is, is our need to explore and create. And,

Tali: 1:08:38

but if exploration is a necessity,

Cody: 1:08:41

is it? Well, I said need, right? Well, I, I guess it's a built-in trait for humans. Mm-hmm.

Tali: 1:08:46

But, and that's how we've gotten to Chad G P t. Yeah. It was inevitable, right? I think so.

Cody: 1:08:55

But yeah, I think if you're, if you're interested in an opportunity thinking in an abundant way is how you get there. And that's how society gets there. Like scarcity mindset throughout a society is largely what causes people to go to war. You know? I mean, it's either a religious thing or it's a resource thing. And most of the time I think it's a resource thing and people are fighting for resources. Mm-hmm. And it's like, well, maybe. Maybe creativity and an attitude that there's enough for everyone to live in abundance is really what we need instead of fighting over it. Whether that's politically, people do it here, you know, right here in the states that this whole left right moral superiority thing that both sides of the political spectrum seem to have I think is really related to a scarcity mindset. And so I think it's valuable for us as individuals, but also for society, for us to get out of that rut and realize that humans are really creative and we can solve a lot of problems.

Tali: 1:10:01

Well, it begins with the individual.

Cody: 1:10:03

Yeah. But yeah, I mean, that's what society is. It's just a bunch of well, it's

Tali: 1:10:06

individuals. Well, people forget that sometimes. Yeah. Yeah.

Cody: 1:10:10

So that was the, yeah, not, not every, Resource is infinite. I'm not saying that, but it might as well be like, well, cause there'll be something else that comes along. Exactly. Yeah. So will oil reserves run out someday? And the answer is yes, but there's also a lot of other technologies that are taking that place. Totally. So yeah, it's just, there's always opportunity to, to grow and to access things that you couldn't access before. Mm-hmm. But it takes that intention. So you wanna sum up,

Tali: 1:10:50

sum up? Oh my gosh, that was a lot

Cody: 1:10:51

to sum up. I know. But I think that we touched on a few things of like how to develop the mindset. So we talked about generosity. Well, knowing about it, it's, yeah. Knowing about it's being aware, I think generosity is one. You can train yourself to be more abundantly minded by acts of generosity, acts of generosity also moving on. Decisions that are not fear-based. Yes. So like I said, I, it just hurts me to see so many people, the vast majority of people in jobs that they hate and that suck, and they just get stuck there for years and years at a time. I just don't think there's much of an excuse for it, no matter who you are, where you come from. And I know that's a really broad statement, but to me it's like if you look at being in a job for 10 years, it's like, was there not an hour in, in the evening that you could have spent developing your skills in some other way? Or even if it's just three hours on a Saturday and that's all you have. Mm-hmm. But if three hours in a Saturday is directed toward change for five years, how could you possibly be in the same job that you hate? That you've hated for the whole five years. Yeah. That doesn't make sense to me. So I think developing that abundance mindset also can be practiced in beginning to make moves for change. Whether you believe it's possible or not, make, make the news, you're investing in yourself. Start, start that action and taking action is what's gonna cause you to believe, have faith, if you will. Yes. It's not the other way around. I think that developing a practice that is the version of yourself that you would rather be is how you create change. Not thinking about who you would rather be and hoping that some opportunity comes along.

Tali: 1:12:56

Well, I think this topic brings. Up a lot of previous conversations that we've had, like the power of association. Mm-hmm. That's a huge one. Yeah. It's a huge one. If you're surrounding yourself by PE with people who don't feel this way mm-hmm. You're gonna go right down with'em. Yeah.

Cody: 1:13:13

I recently started a mastermind for largely because of that. I wanna associate with other men who are building something, who are going places and who have this sort of attitude that life can be more. So let's go ahead and give it a shot, you know? Mm-hmm. And one of the friends on there, I will, I will have on this podcast when we have the technology to do it, I need a, a laptop upgrade before we can do remote podcasting. But just as an example, AUM had this funny thing happen. So he's got a, a swimming pool and the pump went out. And he called a repairman to come fix it. And it was gonna be a few days and a few hundred dollars probably. And so he went on YouTube to see if he could troubleshoot it and found out that there's only like four things that can go wrong with a pump. It's, it's either this, this, this, or this, depending on what it's doing. And so he was able to quickly diagnose it, go out and get the part and replace it for like 20 bucks or something like that. Instead of a couple hundred dollars and waiting for three days. He figured out how to do it himself. And then he realized that guy was gonna charge me 200 bucks. This could be an interesting side gig. And so he set up a website, a one page website that was like free put ads on Craigslist, which was also free. Mm-hmm. And he was making over$4,000 a month fixing people's pool pumps. He had no training, he had no experience, no background. It's just like, oh, here's an easy opportunity. I'll just do this for a few months in this like little lull that I have through the summer and, and. Basically created a business for himself overnight. But that's because he has an attitude of like, well, what could this possibly do? Like he, yeah, he has that attitude of like, of taking that potential opportunity and just exploring it and actually acting on it and doing it.

Tali: 1:15:08

Alyssa and I had a business idea the other day where we help people get rid of things in their closet and we were gonna call it Cutthroat closet. Nice. Yeah, because we think we're an excellent panel. For helping people make decisions about that.

Cody: 1:15:25

You're really good at it for Yeah, you are good at it. I was gonna say for other people, but I've seen you do it in your own closet, so I have to give you credit. Thank you. When I first met you, I was like, oh, damn. Like, are, are you sure you wanna get rid of that? Are you sure you get, I, I still get in that way sometimes because there'll be some dress that I think you'll look amazing in, but you haven't worn it for a while and you're just like, it's, it's not my jam anymore. So,

Tali: 1:15:46

well, in a lot of those clothes I get at discount because I love thrift shopping. Yeah. And so to me, very, there are things that I experience like the sun cost fallacy, where I'm like I should hang onto this cuz I saved up a lot of money for it or whatever. Yeah. But that's not most of my stuff. That's some of my stuff, but not all of it. Yeah. And so I feel like that rotation is okay.

Cody: 1:16:11

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm glad you bring brought up the sunk cost fallacy because that's, Pretty closely related to this too. I don't, I think if you have an abundance mindset, that's what gets you out of the sunk cost fallacy. Mm, mm-hmm. But it has to be.

Tali: 1:16:27

Well, and think of like your dad and what you were talking about with all the things that he's acquired over the years. Like Yeah. That is so sunk. Cost fallacy to the max. Yeah. Yeah,

Cody: 1:16:37

yeah, yeah. I paid this much money for that thing and I haven't used it yet, but it might come in handy in the future. And so I don't wanna get rid of it cause I paid all this money for it. And then

Tali: 1:16:45

multiply that by a thousand. Yeah.

Cody: 1:16:49

Yeah. So, well, I think I think we did a fairly good job. Hour and 15 minutes on this one topic. Where can you see that? And we were just winging it. Oh, cool. So how are you feeling about

Tali: 1:17:01

it? I thought that was great. I'm excited

Cody: 1:17:03

about it. Cool. Well, I do wanna tease a future podcast scenario. For those of you listening, we are gonna have some shorter podcasts. We're gonna be putting out, I'm thinking 20 minutes or so, instead of the hour long format or hour plus where we just drill down into a very practical. Topic. And what these are gonna be is a little bit less philosophical and more just action-based ideas around things like fitness or improving your thinking around something. The sky's the limit cuz live all your life is a broad topic as we started this podcast by saying as we intended it to be. But these shorter podcasts will be a little bit more concise on a specific idea or action that you can take or practice or something to try and a bit more shareable. I think because you'll be able to maybe think of somebody who wow, this this idea really applies to their situation and it's a short enough podcast that it's not so intimidating. I know some people can't wrap their head around an hour and a half long, so Yeah. Or just don't have time. So watch for those in your feed if you're subscribed and if you're not, why are you not subscribed? Hmm. Should be so. I think that's all I got. How about you? I think that's all I

Tali: 1:18:18

got too. Okay. I love you. I

Cody: 1:18:20

love you too face. See you soon.

Tali: 1:18:25

This episode was produced by Tali Zari and Cody Limbaugh. Check out our writing, coaching services and home studying adventures at live all your life.com. For show notes, resources mentioned, or to submit a question or contribution, click on the podcast tab.