Try Having Three Martinis!

On this week’s episode, Bridget rises from the dead after Covid and is officially back to believing life is worth living thanks to a girls weekend in Florida. Colleen, on the other hand, has done absolutely nothing but did come prepared with a fully chaotic Notes app list which somehow always delivers.

Then we get into the story of the week, SHAYNA HUBERS and the murder of Ryan Poston. Think of the most toxic on again, off again relationship you know and then crank it up to a level that makes your jaw drop. Bridget walks through how they met, the spiraling dynamic between them, and how it all came crashing down in the most shocking way.

It’s messy, disturbing, and you are absolutely not ready for where this story goes. Grab three martinis and let's have a kiki!

Sources:

• From Obsession to Murder: The Girlfriend Who Wouldn't Let It Go - Bailey Sarian
• Clips played start at 19:30 in Bailey's video

Review and subscribe! You can find us on Instagram @Sippinwiththeshannons or send us your stories at Sippinwiththeshannons@gmail.com. Love you, mean it.

Transcript

0:24

Everybody. Everybody wants to be a cat. Oh, wow. Abraham, Lacey, Giuseppe, Casey Thomas, Somal. O'Malley, the alley. Did you have a crush on him when you were a kid? No. Yes, he was a sexual awakening for me. Okay. I was gonna say he was probably your first animated character. It's a tie between him and VU from Lion King two. Vu. Something about him, just his voice really did it for me. But I did watch the Aris of Cats the other night. Oh, did you? Yeah. So it's on the brain. Did you make John watch it? I did. And unimpressed, but like cool. Yeah. Cool. With the, you know, the scat cat, you know, the scat Cat. I feel like sometimes when you rewatch a movie from the nineties, it's good because it's nostalgic to you and not because it's actually good. That's correct. I did see somebody that has been watching, like me and my boyfriend, husband, whatever, doesn't matter, human. I have been watching a new, not new, but picking a Disney movie every single Thursday and watching it. Oh, wow, okay. It's like, I kinda love that. That's cute. A little scratch, a little scratch of an itch, and then you just get through the ball. I'm thinking Peter Pan. Peter Pan this week. Oh, I'm also with Peter Pan. Why? What's the tea? I don't know. I just don't think it's gonna age well. Something about it. It's weird to me. He's a mythical creature. Grow up. He's a mythical boy. Just another man who won Grow Up. I like him. Grow up Peter Pan, the Real life version one. Jeremy Sumner, sexual Awakening. Oh, he was on TikTok recently and his face popped up and all the comments were like, oh. We know who you are. You don't have to describe yourself. You have to explain. You have no idea what you did to these. His eyeballs are so beautiful. Yes, they are. Indeed they are. Tinker Ball's my favorite though, so I can't really, that adds attracts, we can't do away with Pizza Pet. No. Aladdin was my favorite when I was a kid. Oh, it's sad. Aladdin's hit the bottom. Rah. I love Hercules. I love Mulan. Yeah, I mean there's, there's some bangers. Definitely a lot of bops, if they played that in the club, I would be, the way I would pussy pop, I would be flailing rolling. Make a man outta you. Rolling. Run through the wall. That's a good workout song. Not that I work out to be like, you must be sw man. On the foot of Great Beyond with all the straight, the raging fire, the dark side of the moon. Okay, Don Osmond. I was thinking about this the other day at my skull class and I was like, what if you look around? Sure. What are we preparing for? Do you know what I mean? Like, I get like, this is a good workout, but no, it's like we look like we are prepped and ready for war. Ah, I see. Men could never, you're moving your body so that you live longer and your body feels good and it feels healthy. No, that's correct. But like you're, you put these, not me specifically, but these bitches in the front row, on the front lines. Yes. And they'll, they will, they'll fuck some bitches up. No, that them and the hillbillies. The hillbillies, yeah. Those people that are living in the haulers, the haulers and the swallows. Give them, get'em on the front lines. They've been like foaming at the mouth for something. Absolutely. Give them a purpose. No, they need it. They're ready. They're armed and ready. Like foaming at the mouth, teeth missing. Oh, I always feel that way about like CrossFit people, I'm like, what? Why? They just give me an fake, I put them in the same category as the people that do parkour, a dream parkour. All I can picture is Michael Scott. That's all I can picture. It's like the same category. Those are the same people to you? Yeah, a hundred percent. Sing hardcore cross people. Interesting. I, I think CrossFit people would be super offended by that. Oh, sorry. CrossFit people. No, I'm, I'm not saying you have to apologize. I think that's like a funny common, that's a funny Venn diagram to me. Yes. No, I understand that. The end result's a little bit different, but like the vibes that you're going for in those classes, it's the same, it's the same for me. Different things that give off the same vibes. That's correct. Hi everyone. Hey. Welcome to this week's episode of Sipping with the Shannons. We're cousins and every other week we sit down, we sip on some wine, we talk some shit, and we have a good giggle. I'm Bridget Shannon. And I'm Colleen Shannon. And I'm back from the dead. Yeah. I was really scared of you. I'm not gonna lie. Yeah. So two weeks ago, Colleen appeared on, on my doorstep as I do, as she does on a, on a pretty much regular basis. Mm-hmm. Scheduled some would argue and walked in to me in the fetal position, unable to breathe. Mm-hmm. Or talk. Or really like get through a sentence without convulsing and having, she was leaking full body coughs and leaking from nearly every orifice. There was definitely a leaky cauldron situation going on for sure. And she said, you know, we just don't have to record this podcast. Right. Yeah. Like, you know, you don't actually have to die in order to record this podcast. We can just, we do have free will. There is no gun to our head. Do we? We can proceed. I know, you know how I feel about skipping an episode though? I, I really don't like it. And just know, guys, I had COVID, OVID. I have never been that sick in my adult life, ever. It was a full two weeks. I was not contagious for a full two weeks, but I, I've never been down so bad. I am still coughing. I'm still blowing my nose. Oh, she'll linger. I cannot get over how fucking sick I was. I do not recommend not being able to smell pizza while you eat. It is not something I would wish on. My worst enemy. Not being able to smell or taste food was really upsetting to me. Like I was Googling this comes back. Right? Like this has to come back. Just, just checking also though, like, not to be toxic, but like, we'd be so silly. No, no, Colleen. Okay. Sorry. No, like truly not worth it. Like I was having a slice of pizza and I was like, all I can feel is texture. Oh yeah. Like you would really struggle with it. Yeah. I wouldn't like that. I would not like that.'cause think of your favorite foods and take out all of the smells and the taste of them and like the, the Annie's mac and cheese. Right. Like imagine what that would just taste like texture wise with nothing else added to it. Yeah. That's unfortunate. I'm really sorry that happened to you. I really, really didn't enjoy that. But it's okay. I rebounded work sent me to San Francisco for the week. And so I was frolicking around San Francisco, soaking up some sun, having a grand old time. And then I flew to Florida and had the best girl weekend ever with all of my college friends. Mm-hmm. And we pussy popped and we laid at a spa and we got massages and we swam in a pool and we got pub subs. And I ate a thick ass Italian sub on the beach with some sour cream and onion chips. And a soda. A soda, a crispy soda, a soda, a crispy fountain soda. And we went in the water. The water was a little cold, I won't lie, but. 82 degrees on that beach. I was like, I'm, I'm cured. Like, I'm literally a good laugh with your girlfriends in the sun. Period. Warm weather. Hot. The vibes were so high. One night, Jill's engaged in her amazing fiance. He's so wonderful. He grilled for us. He made us porterhouse steaks one night. And so like with zucchini and a Caesar salad and a tortellini salad and mac and cheese. What a king. It was so fucking good. It was so fucking good. So we stayed in and just drank wine and caught up and talked shit. And then the next night we went, we went out on the town and it was just, just like pussies were popped, pussies were lost. They weren't just popped, they were lost. Two wicked funny things I have to tell you. And then I'll pass it back to you. No, I, I have nothing. Keep it going. Keep it going. We do this really funny thing now. We were at a restaurant having tacos for dinner and I was talking about need. Some sort of K hole. I was like, not it, I was saying something like, someone hit me with the ke, just take me out essentially. Yeah. And we were talking about how funny it would be. I go, wouldn't it be funny if someone just from across the room just shot a dart into my neck and I just went out? And so all night at the bar, the new bit is you pretend to shoot a dart at someone and they have to fake collapse like Andy's toys, like Andy's coming and you all just pass out. So we did it. We did it on the airplane, we did it saying goodbye to each other. I was like, bye. And they were like, Bridget, I turned around, they went pass out. So that's the new bit. I'm really enjoying it. And we were at the bar and we're having a grand old time and shots are being had and everyone's losing the plot and cigarettes are being smoked and everyone's at their finest. And I love this comedian Caleb Heron. I, if you listen to this podcast, you know this. I love him. Of course you don't have obsessed with him. It's not new news, that's for sure. He says to Drew. One of her episodes, I'll kill you to death with a gun and fuck your dad. And I think it's the funniest comeback of all time. Like, there's just nothing funnier. So I say that to my girlfriends, like, if they do something, instead of being like, oh my God, shut up. I say, I will kill you to death with a gun and fuck your dad. I obviously don't mean it. I just think it's hilarious. Which part don't you mean? Both really? All of it. Okay. From top to bottom. You never know these days. Yeah. No, I'm good. I'm good. Okay. I'm, I'm, I'm all set with their dads in the gun, in the Killing. And so I, the irony of this episode later on the topic, oh, wk wk, wink wk. So we're out at the bar and one of my friends, Jill does something and I yell, I will kill you to death with a gun and fuck your dad like obnoxiously in a fucking Florida three. So drunk, his eyes are crossed. Goes, I'm Chad. Like he thought I said I would fuck Chad. And he thought his time had come and he raised his hand. I'm Chad and slurred. I'm Chad. Oh my God. Completely cross-eyed. I laughed. What is a Florida three? So what the fuck is a Florida? You know what it is? No, I don't because like Florida's like down there, like I'm talking like probably a little sweaty, little rough around the edge. There's lots of sandals. Like how is Rich was like a W He was a Florida three. Okay. So that's not that bad. It's not great. It's not great. 10 is the best. This is out of 10. And a Florida 10 is like not a 10. 10, correct. Understood. Solid floor three. Got it. I'm Chad. Oh, I was like, sir, I, we didn't mean you, we weren't talking about you we're gonna put a pin in you. I said fuck it Dad. Not fuck it. Chad, you. This was not a call to duty. Oh fuck your dad. Chad. Where's your dad? Your dad isn't safe, Chad. No, but the spa was amazing. I got a massage that made me leave my body. I loved San Fran. Like I was so down bad. And then had, you know, ultimate highs, ultimate lows as what a rollercoaster as it goes. I've been rewatching Game of Thrones, and I, I'm on season five now. In season three and four are just, season four is a fucking masterpiece. And I'm just, I'm sad for it to start getting bad now. Oh yeah.'cause isn't the end bad. Yeah. After season six, it's not great. Did you watch the spinoff yet? No, I have not. I've heard it's a very, very, very good. Oh, well that's good to know. Like, borderline better. I'm not surprised to be totally honest with you. On the plane I watched F1, Brad Pitt is so hot. Really? Brad Pitt is so fucking hot. I was on the edge of my seat. Literally. I know it's about F1 racing, but I was on the edge of my seat. It was a little long. How long? Two and a half hours. Oh, ew. Like the flight from Jacksonville to Boston. I had it playing during takeoff and it was almost, I was like, when are they gonna shut it off? It played to the gate. Oh, wow. And I was like, oh, with seconds remaining. And then it shut off. So it was like the full flight, but it was really good. I enjoyed it. Okay. Okay. The Oscars happened. Shout out to sinners. I'm very happy for Michael B. Jordan. Timay. Shaima shouldn't be making ballet and in ballet and opera jokes, or he probably would've won. Yeah, you can't, you can't punch down on your own community because the people who for you also like those things. Yeah. So they're saying that might be why I don't care. I thought Michael B. Jordan and Sinners was amazing. He literally plays himself twice. Which leads me to Lindsay Lohan also should win an Oscar for her work on Parrot Trap. I would agree. Double times the work. Yeah. Huh. Two different personalities, same person. I see. I was actually, now that you're mentioning the twin thing, I was in a spiral of a TikTok this morning, and I don't know if you've ever seen this, that there's like a theory that twins are separated at birth and purposely once put into stardom. Child child stars are twins and one's put into startup, and then the other one's kind of just like thrown off into the middle of like, chuck fuck country and seeing if they can figure it out at the same time. Like, for example, the three brother, the three identical brother thing. No, it's a different one. This one's perfectly, like, for example, think of two celebrities that look like, they're always like, oh my God, they look the exact same. Like Margot Robbie and what's her name? Weaver. Like, they're, they're twins. Like, things like that. Hmm. It was crazy interesting. I watched it for way too long, honestly. But give it a watch. Oh. Also, tell me, have you seen the thing about Anne Hathaway and her husband being like, William Shakespeare and his wife reincarnated? Yes. That's crazy. Okay. What conspiracy theories, what rabbit hole have we gone down? So I'm, I'm a TikTok rabbit holer. Mm. You know, but I, I, I believe that reincarnation, you know? Mm-hmm. Willie Shakes. Willie Shakes has comeback. Short girl. Go back to your, your officers. No, I'm, I'm happy as a clam. Daylight savings happened, so my whole personality got better. Mm-hmm. Turns out I'm not depressed. I just need sun. Yeah. I was thinking about this during daylight savings time. I have not felt, felt warm sun or any form of UV that isn't this since September. Yeah. We gotta change that doll. Yeah. We gotta change that for sure. Yeah. Yeah, because it, it literally, I got home and I was like, I don't wanna buy a house. I wanna buy a rental property somewhere warm, and I wanna live here and rent it out. And then when I wanna go somewhere, that's where I go. And I don't know how I'm gonna make that happen. I'm not a millionaire. I'm not even close, but I will literally sell pictures of my feet. I don't care. I need warmth and I hate living here. From January to May, I will die on that hill. I think happen. I think your passion could make it happen. Thank you, Colleen. I appreciate that. Mm-hmm. I literally have no shit to talk though, like there's no juicy update. Okay. That's like not a bad thing. I'm going on. I'm on the apps. I'm dating again when I have a hilarious story to tell you guys. I will. I went on a date with a man. He was a horrible kisser. He licked my entire face and so he had to go, well you didn't tell me about that. Oh my God. He literally ate my face. That's disgusting. Like there wasn't a part of my face that wasn't wet. Like what do you mean? Like he was like, he literally took your face and was licking your face. He was tongue first. That's disgusting. Like, you know when you kiss someone and you put your lips on theirs? Yeah. And then your mouths open. Yeah. His tongue is the first thing that hit my body. Ew. Ew. Yes. And had the audacity to say, can you believe people our age dunno how to kiss? Isn't that crazy? He said that. Yes. Out loud. And I was like, is it from a different land?'cause maybe they do that over there. No. Wow, that's interesting. And I was like, yeah, it is crazy. Heard it here first. Keep your tongues in your fucking goddamn mouth. The call's coming from inside the house. I don't even like tongue that much. I don't either. I am like a 95% mouth, 5% tongue person. I agree. He was 120% tongue. I don't even know if I felt his lips. Ew. Yeah, it was crazy. It was a really good date too, so that was kind of a bummer. Oof. But you, I cannot get past bad kissing. I can't, no, it can't be taught because, okay. This is gonna sound a little like, married couples are not having sex all the time. Right. But you kiss all the time. Yeah. I feel like you just pick, you're doing something. Like, I feel like I wouldn't just look at John and be like, and just like make out and then walk away. Like that's just not a, like, we're not going old and gray fucking 16 times a week, but we, we are probably gonna kiss for the rest of our lives. Yeah. You can't be bad at that. So you don't know how to just be like, you're gonna, you're gonna lead tongue. First he looked like an iguana. Ew, what's his name? The iguana from dangled to. It's a chameleon. Oh. And his name is Pascal. Oh, sorry. Pascal. How dare you. So yeah, I'm back on the apps. It is a trash fire, but I think what's been really fun about this time is that I truly don't care. Like I'm just doing it for the plot. Mm-hmm. Like I just am going on these dates to have fun and like meet new people and see what happens. And so there's just so much less baggage around it. It's just like for funsies. Yeah. I'm like not trying to meet You can't know what they say. It's when you list back there, I will kill you to death. Gonna fuck your dad. No, please don't fuck my dad. That'd be interest. Yeah. It wouldn't be gross, so don't make me, that would be like, it's gonna say like legal because it's like disabled. It is illegal. Disabled person kind of. Oh, Colleen. Sorry. You can cut that out. She's a little sorry. My elderly ladies are doing well by the way. Mm. Thanks for asking. Mm, they're do you are, you're gonna say that to a girl when she has a mouthful of wine? You bitch. No. They're doing really well. And last night I beat Jenny in chess, but she's blind. Couldn't you just tell her she won? Okay. I texted Karen and was like, you're gonna be so, because Karen plays dress really well. Karen plays dress every single day. Did you know that? I literally did not know that. Yeah. There's this guy at work and as they walk by each other and when they go into this room, they each make a, a pass. So they're just like constantly moving one. I'm gonna text her right now and say, since Wendy did you play chess? Because I, yeah, tell,'cause I told her about how me and Jenny played and she's like, oh, I play chess every single day. I'm sending her voice memo. And I was like, that's crazy. And so I text her and she goes, wow, you beat a blind woman, proud of yourself. And I was like, she's played her whole life and she's 71. Yeah, I'm fucking proud of myself. I would've been like Helen Keller taught her. How so, shut up. It's impressive. I had no idea that you are a frequent chess player. That's really interesting. I learned something new about you. That's really nice. Bye. Anyway, so that's really what's new with me. I think that's everything. I'm feeling very refreshed in, so much better than last time you saw me. Oh, I'm so glad because it, like, it was dark, it was deaths doorstep for sure. Desolate times. No, I, I truly have never been that, like, to the point where I thought, I'm gonna have to take myself to the hospital and stay because it wasn't getting better. I don't mind having a cold. I've had every sinus infection under the sun. I've had bronchitis. Like I know what it is to be sick. It was the combo of like six different illnesses for a solid week, where not one single time was I sleeping well, was I breathing okay? I just was like, oh, this isn't getting better. You're just like, sick of it. And one of my friends had COVID and it turned into pneumonia. And I was like, this is how she goes. This is how, this is how it ends. It's where it ends. This is where it ends. It's a, it's a while ride. Yeah. On this couch where honestly makes sense. Lived and died. But we're good now. Feeling much better. Feeling a little sun kissed. Feeling my, my cup. If runneth over. You're glowing. Thank you so much. She just cringed at me. Yeah, yeah. Take it. Dang it. Oh, all right. All right. Alright. Tries to be nice one time to me. All right. What's new with you? Tell me everything you're gonna giggle because my notes are from the two, two weeks prior. Oh boy. Which would be probably three weeks, honestly. Yeah. And, and when this comes out, four. The way I was like, what did I mean by that? In my notes? So please do bear with me. Mm-hmm. Do, do bear. Mm-hmm. First of all, I would like to say that I have a note that says, and I, I simply have been trying to rack my brain all day, is what the fuck I was trying to say. A note that just says the mix between something smelling and swimming. I have no idea what, how to translate that. What the could that possibly be. I have no idea what that means, Colleen. You didn't. Me either. Okay. That wasn't me asking. It was just me being like, just calling it out. Here's a, here's a glimpse, here's a glimpse into, into my brain. Yeah. The first thought was, where the fuck is Nancy Guthrie? Where the fuck is Nancy Guthrie? And that person that was taking a video shoot, like a, a photo shoot outside of where, where the fuck is she? Yeah. And also what's wrong with people? And someone knows something. And I saw Savannah do an interview and she says that like, someone has to know something. No, they, yes. This elderly woman does not just get like, kidnapped, like what the fuck is going on? Literally where they're offering a million dollars and I think the F FBI is offering a hundred thousand at this point. Someone has to know. It's sad that people even have to do that. I know, to be honest with you. I know. Like I get that people love an incentive, but like that's fucked up. Yeah. You should just do the right thing. This little lady, lady. I also wrote Imagine being so down bad that people think. That it's your dupe on the red carpet. Jim Carrey. Yeah. Yeah. He does not look the same. He does not look the same. Jim being so with it that they're like, oh, that has to be an imposter. Like that's Well, so they're saying that about Bradley Cooper. Oh, right. And I don't know if he's gotten work done, but Will Our Nets one of his best friends and was like, he straight up has not had any work done. So you just are aging poorly now. Everyone's calling you out on it because you look so bad. Everyone's like, it's gotta be ai. He died and this is the clone. That's crazy because that's how bad you look. That's crazy. That's crazy. He, he something does not look correct. Okay. I haven't seen him recently, so I don't know, but okay. Well, not completely insane to say. I mean, it's okay for him to go a little downhill. He had his prime. He's fine. Yeah, that's true. We're allowed to age, believe it or not, my next snow is the theory about Anna Hathaway and her husband being Shakespeare and Ssy wife is what I wrote. I don't think I met that. Cool. Cool. Cool, cool, cool. I watched Dead of Winter, the movie. Okay. It's advertised as like a thriller. It's very edge of your seat, but it has a tied in a bow at the end, so I think you should watch it. No, I love, so I think you should watch it. It's really good. It's this old lady that stumbles across a scenario in the woods that she, and she like takes it down like a badie. Okay, great. Really? I, I recommend, I think it's on HBO Max. Kristen Wig looks so fucking good. Incredible. In Creo the dark hair. Oh my god. She looks so good. I think that brunette, well not that brunettes were ever like not, but like they're really making a comeback lately. And blondes who aren't natural blondes and maybe are like a ashy blonde Yeah. Are like really leaning into the bro and the, the brunette and I'm here for it and it's working. Yeah. Come to our level. Yeah. Bring that ass down. Yeah. You just suddenly are like making it a thing. And now you love it. We've been here, bitch. We've been here this all time. But really she looks great. And also it's a hard thing sometimes I think if you have light features to have dark hair. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And she does it like that just because it can wash you out. Yeah. Like when we look pale, we look so fucking pale and pigeon, whatever her first name is Sarah, maybe is her first name. I think pigeon. Sarah Pigeon from, she's in the carol Carol. And JFK love story. Oh, she is was in the wild and she had black hair in blue eyes. Oh, she looks so much fucking better as a blonde. Really? Look it up right now. Like it's gonna be astonishing to you. Is it Meryl Streep's daughter? No. No. Maybe I haven't seen the love story yet. The show. I don't know her backstory. I just know she was on the Wilds and they canceled it after a season. It was very upsetting. Oh, the girl who plays Carolyn? Yeah. Oh yeah. She's stunning. She, hold on. Caroline Kennedy. Oh yeah. Is Streep's daughter. In the show. Yeah. This is Meryl Streep's daughter. Oh yes. I apologize. Yes, you are correct. Yeah. We're talking about two different people. Yes. The sister, JFK's sister Yes. Is right. Correct. Okay. But yeah, Carolyn Bessette, the girl who plays her is Gorge. Gorge. Gorge. Gorge. Yes, she is. I need to show you her hair transformation. It's crazy Like that's what she looked like before and I don't think she's ever been blonde. She's never looked better blonde. Right. Crazy. Yeah. This, we'll post a picture of you guys so you can see it. Mind boggling. They, she looks so much better. So much better. Yeah. It it like the dark brown, like washes her out. Yeah. So I didn't watch that whole thing. I just caught glimpses and like snippets of episodes because Aaron and Fiona were watching it and I was like watching alongside them. And I like can't get into it because I don't know who they've like talked to. Obviously that was like in their lives. IIRL. But like their fight in the notorious fight that they have mm-hmm. In the park. Yeah. It's like they make a whole episode about the contracts of the, like they make a fight. Right. But they don't, no one actually knows what they were fighting about. So it's like, who are you to make up this whole episode with like an actual storyline? Yeah. Of a like just That's fair. That's fair. Don't get it. How are we doing that? No one knows though. No one to this day knows what was happening. Not a legitimate back and forth of like conversation, but like a high level. But then some people think it went one way and some people think it was the other. So some people think it's like about her being upset about being in the limelight too much, but then also that makes no sense because they'd been together for years. Like you didn't think that, you know what I mean? Why would that come about now? I dunno. I've seen a couple different things about it. They took too much creative liberty for your liking on that. Yes, that's correct. Yeah, that's correct. I wanted to say, I know we talked about it last episode, who we would want to be on the traders and I forgot to say Claudia Ri and I just had to give that, put that one in there. Great. And Wendy Williams. Good lord. Okay, sure. I wrote, I'm so sick of Justin Bieber and what's her face? And I know, I mean, Hailey Bieber, I'm just like sick of them. Okay. Yeah. I need him to stop trying to like, why is his pants always down on his knees? Pull'em up. Summon ain't right. Something aren't right. Summon ain't right. And so just, I don't know, something doesn't sit well with me. Amanda Petula. Mm-hmm. Have you heard about this? This is the summer house girl. Summer house, girly swirly. That's married to that 45-year-old man who sucks. Yes. And they're getting a divorce or something. They're finally getting a fucking divorce, right? Yeah. Last night's episode. Didn't a age? Well, because I haven't watched it yet, but I keep seeing clips where she, he's like screaming at her, calling her a dumb ass bitch. You wouldn't live to see another day. Isn't this the one Paige was like, really? She like goes for him a lot. Oh yes. Yeah. Okay. She's like, I'm the one that comforts your girlfriend or now wife when you're out partying until three o'clock in the morning. Like, sorry, I speak my mind. Paige is a queen. We love her. Love Paige. Did you see her and Hannah Burner getting a television show written by Amy Fucking Polar? I imagine. I was so excited when I saw that for them. I was like, her bringing up with Craig is the best thing that's ever happened to her. There has never been a better trajectory of a breakup than the one that Paige DeSorbo experienced. Yeah. And he's, and good for fucking her. I don't avidly watch Southern Charm, but when I do he's not doing great. He's not doing great. No, of course he's not. Yeah, of course. He's fucking not, she was their entire brand. Yeah. Fucked up. Love it. But yeah, I'm so glad for Amanda Petula. She is been popping off ever since, like social media wise, she's just living life and I'm really happy for her. And it's like on a decent ending. On the Toast, they were talking about this, there's this new face that's in, I don't know if you've noticed, people have just been doing like a pouty face. It's like, yes. Can they stop? Yeah. It's a Gen Z, like pout. It's like a formal, I understand. Maybe like in a selfie. I guess maybe like if you're taking like a formal full body photo with your outfit, like let's just not gimme a sm So I'm okay with the sm, but like a P is just not, I just love smiling. It's just not hitting for me. You know, just like what happened to good old fashioned looking, excited and happy to be alive. Yeah, I would agree. Sarah j Masson call her daddy. So I didn't watch it all. I just watched clips of it, but I'm of course so pumped for the, the dual book release. One's happening in September and I think the other is happening in the winter January. Yeah, like early earlier or like October, Jan, whatever it is. And she said that it's meant to be read as like one big book essentially. So there're there, it's a dual. Yeah. I don't know who's gonna be about, I know I need to finish. If it's about fucking Tamlin, I'm gonna lose my goddamn mind. I gotta finish Nester's book. I feel like it's gonna be about Elaine probably, but I, she's like lowkey and so what was me? It could be about more. I would like that. It would be about more. I would like that, but sometimes they don't. I would even take a Cassian book. Oh, who? Cassian. But he already had one. Which one? The one with Nesta. Oh. But that doesn't count. That's her book. Yeah. But technically like Reese Sand, it's half, half his own books. Half, yeah, it's half and half I guess. It's from, I, I would say she'll probably stick to like the sister point of view other than like the novella, but I'm assuming it's about Elaine. I would love some more Ellucian. I would love some more Israel. I need Israel's backstory. I love him. I know you don't, don't look at me like that. I love him. No, I know you. He need no more. The poor, tortured soul. You're sick. I know. I'm so deeply unwell, but yeah, that's how I feel. I'm very excited. I didn't listen'cause I don't like Alex Cooper, but we know sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. I did see a clip and I don't like her, but I thought it was funny. Sophia Franklin is coming out with a book. Did you see? Yes. And her whole, like it's basically she's just like really coming for Alex. Like it's crazy. How do you feel about that? I feel like there's some truth to it. I just feel like she would, I don't, I'm not a fan of her. I'm not a fan of either, honestly. Mm. But I feel like there is some truth in what she said. And honestly, Sophia is saying that unwell, if you ever listened to her original call her daddy, like the unwell statement is all Sophia. It has nothing to do with that Alex. Right. So like wasn't it about like calling out sick from work or something? No, it's just like, oh my God. Like that's crazy. Or like, I can't believe you just said that. I'm unwell. Like essentially the context. But I think it started because Sophia couldn't go into work the next day and she wrote that in an email to her boss. I'm unwell. Like I can't come in. I'm so unwell. Oh, probably. And I think that's what started the train. Yeah. I agree. I'm sure there's some truth to it, but now it's looking a little desperate to me personally. Yeah, I would agree. But I also feel like there's no other than her making small comments in interviews or podcasts Yeah. She's never like really done a tell all just dropped it. It's so interesting to like watch how all of this will unfold because. Imagine, and I'm trying to think of this from Sophia's aspect, like imagine having this massive breakup, but also your entire full-time job collapsing. Yeah. Losing all your money, your clout, whatever, almost overnight, essentially, whether she it was her fault or not, that that's not what I'm debating. And then having the girl you are partners with literally skyrocket into super stardom. Yeah. I take everything. I mean, she is she fucking interviews, the most famous people, presidential candidates, like we're talking the most famous people on the planet. Yeah. I will say, I think it would be more pathetic if she wasn't doing okay. Like she's like, got a man. Yeah. She's happy, she's successful. That's true. She's not unhappy with her life. She just like, she's not grappling at straws. No. It feels more of a tell all than like a. It's now my life's mission to take her down because I'm not doing anything. Yeah, you're the truth. It has nothing to do with that. It's very just like, oh, here you go. So I'm actually okay with it. Stats in southeast clothing, CLO clothing is closing. I am upset about it because of the buffalo tenders, the best buffalo tenders on the fucking planet. That's all I know. You don't feel way about buffalo tenders, but I just need everybody to know. I know. I, I hate buffalo chicken in really any facet. But I am sad for you. The people are quaking. Okay. Just know. Okay. But I thought it was like they're building shit on top of it and they're gonna reopen it. They are. But like to be closed is upsetting. We love a Sunday. It's stats. RDV Sunday, the dj, like, come on now. They're doing that to the burn too. And it's so unacceptable. Yeah, that's rude. So fucking rude. I've been watching a lot of people investigate on HB Max slash Yes. I said I'm addicted. I can't. So good. On top of that, there's, we watched it when I was sick. That's what we watched. Mm-hmm. They have, well, some of them are like that wasn't okay, but it's like, oh, who am I to be like, oh, it wasn't murderous enough for me this episode. You know, like, shut up Colleen. I watched a couple good Hulu ones too. There's the one on oh my God, I don't even know the names, but I'm not even joking. If you go on Hulu and go to True Crime, it's like the top three. And they're all around the same basis. They're all from Hulu, like created by Hulu. Mm-hmm. There's three different ones. One's about like this couple, not couple, these two boys that like do some weird shit to this girl and like they're trying to figure out how she's murdered. Oh God. Basically it's a murder and then the people who do it are like a wicked close friend in the friend group. They're like in high school, it's fucked up. And then they just go about their, their lives. They go about, they go to school and it's them trying to to figure it out. Yeah. It's like murder amongst the friend group kind of thing. Got it. Got it. I'm not gonna be like, it was so good'cause like that's fucked up. But you, I talk about this a lot. Right. But it was a good watch. Informative. I watched Ready or Not again. Did you ever watch that? Did I ever make you watch that? Ready or not? Is that where she runs around the house? Yes. And they hide and see her? Yes. Okay. No, I have not seen that. I know they coming out part two. They're the second one. They're coming out with the second one. Yes. I think it came out this week. So I re-watched that. I made Johnny watch it. He actually loved it. Oh, he did? Yes, he loved it. Oh good. I think it's'cause it kind of was like funny at the same time. Yeah, it wasn't heavy. Okay. And the second one apparently takes off right Where they leave her, like on the steps at the end of the movie. That's where the second movie pop starts, which is really cool. So I'm excited to see, see that. Did you see the promo for Dirty Rotten Scandal? No. The spinoff from, not spinoff, I should say Janice Dickinson's in it about, no, but we talked about it, the Americans Next Top Model episode. That, that this was like pro the promo came pro the real, the long promo. And it looks good. Okay. It looks good. There's other models in it. The ones that weren't in ATM one promo, I mean, know what I'm trying to say. Fucking documentary that we watched. Okay. So I'm excited. I'm excited. Yeah, me too. Can't wait. They hand a Montana special. Oh, how are you feeling? Annoyed. Why? You wanted this so bad. Unsatisfied? A little, a little. So it was only an hour long. They only had, they had chaperone on there. Why? Why was she a guest star? Why, why did we take time out of our precious episode and didn't have previous co-stars, but we had Chapel Ronan on there. Why? I'm upset about it. And they had Selena Gomez on for one moment. She's on a couple episodes. I think she played this character Mikayla, if I remember correctly. And she just like says hi and bye. Super weird. It was kind of like checking a box. And they had Billy Ray Cyrus on it for a hot second. Even though him and Miley aren't on good terms, Tish was ended a bunch. There was no Ricoh, there was no Jackson, there was no Emily Osmond. There was no whatever. It's Oliver. There was no, none of them. None of them love it. I was so upset. What did you want? Exactly? Like a friends. Ah. Gotcha. That's what every, like I thought it was just, oh, was I just expecting that? But like Fiona was like, what the fuck? Like this is stupid. Mm. She did resing her version. What would be like, how Taylor came out with her version or whatever of Taylors very the climb. Yep. This is the life best of both worlds. That was really good. And she had a song at the end that was basically like her talking to her younger self. It was good. Oh, that's nice. It was really good. Me and Fiona were really silently crying at the end. Oh, that's nice. But if you're looking to get like full fulfillment out of it, you won't just an FY. I got it. Speaking of which, I'm so over chaperone, why can't she just like the paparazzi and why is she mean to children? Did you see that she was mean to what she was mean to an 11-year-old at a restaurant? I think it's Spain maybe. I dunno what happened. There was a child that I guess walked up to her like just didn't say anything, but like was like, is there a video of it? I dunno. I saw, I've seen it everywhere though. Okay. But not the, like any content. Okay. It was just like a and she like went up'cause she wasn't sure or he wasn't sure if like that was her or not. And she like freaked out and called security and was like, go get, get him and like screamed I guess allegedly. Oh wow. Yeah, that's too much.'cause I keep seeing a lot of funny tiktoks being like, every time Chapel Row sees an 11-year-old and it's like Jesus. So you know how the internet takes things and really runs with it. Yep. And I got a posture corrector. You did text me yesterday. I'm sitting in a posture corrector. It feels really good. What is it like a bra type of thing? It is. So it's tan and it's like a bra, stretchy bra material. Call it. And it goes Mm mm-hmm. Lemme say, I will say though, because my posture was up, like my, my boobs are look a little perky. It, you put it on like a backpack and then it cis underneath your boobs. And then there's another one that crisscrosses across your back that when you pull it, it tightens up your back like that. And then you, it sticks in the front. Oh, wow. Yeah. And how are you feeling? It feels great. You only leave it on for like an hour though.'cause it's really bad for you if you do that apparently for long term. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That fucks you up. That's fair. So I've been doing my hour for the past two days and I, it feels nice. Oh, maybe I'll do that the end of the day or something. Yeah. Or like, wow, I'm cooking. Yeah. Yeah. I literally had it one at my desk today. Don't, no one cares. No one needs to know. Nobody needs to nap underneath my blazer with my pants unbuttoned. I don't care. No shoes, pants unbuttoned, posture corrector on no makeup. I have a five star employee at my desk eating cheese and crackers. Oh, Colleen, you kill me. Eating cheese and crackers. I have recently as the good Lord intended. Hallelujah. I have recently started drinking Propel. I know no one cares about that, but I just need to say it out loud. Sugar-free black cherry propel injected into my veins. You are so weird. It's so good. Is this the new hyper fixation? Maybe for like a week. Any other hyper fixations? I, no. Why is cottage cheese so bad? Oh, it's so gross. Like I tried blending it. Talk about consistency. I'm just so over it. I've never been more pressured in my whole life to eat cottage cheese and protein than I, I can, I'm overwhelmed. Okay, but you pressure yourself. Like one night I texted you and you were like, I'm ju you are having a meltdown about something hard will That was like very much okay to have a meltdown about like so much bigger in life. And then you were like, and also I can't make myself like hardboiled eggs. And I was like, great. So the first one, totally valid. Second one self. Why are you doing this to yourself? It's not that I don't even like hardboiled eggs like I do, but you just don't have to force yourself to like something you don't like. I do like them though, but every time I make them, they come out fucking soft boiled and then I start to gag and it freaks me out. Okay, well fucking leave them on the boiler longer. Are you weirdo? How long are you leaving them on there? 15 minutes. All right. Leave it on for 20 and then they blow up, I think. No, they don't. You wanna know something of all, so upsetting? Sure. Well, two, one upsetting thing and two, one gross thing. Okay. The upsetting thing is, I had a Turkey aversion recently. Okay. I ate a Turkey sandwich and all of a sudden I just was like, and that is truly tragic. So I'm off the Turkey right now. I, I don't understand. You don't ever, just like, what was the difference between, you don't ever get like a Turkey ick? No. Like, or like an ick for food? No. Oh my God. It happens to me with egg sometimes. I had an egg ick the other day. I had to like back away for a couple days. It just happens, and all of a sudden my body will crave it again. But something happened to me. I took a bite into a Turkey sandwich and all of a sudden I just started freaking out. All righty. But then no follow-ups. But then I go to Turkey club from this place by the beach in Marshfield. Okay. I say, big boy, have a picture of it and everything. I'll show you. You'd be like, Ooh, that's divine. I ate one half of it and then I'm on my way home and I looked down. And I see what would be like a little hair. So I go to pull it and it's, it's stuck. She's, she's not budging. So I opened the said sandwich and I'm like, whatever. It's just like a little puby hair. I'll just pull it out. This man, this hair was longer than my hair, and it was intertwined between the Turkey sandwich, the Turkey meats through the bacon and out the tomato. I was so set. I shook it out and I ate it. Anyways, the hair was literally longer than mine and it was curly. I have no words. I was so upset. Do you know that's my biggest ick in my life is hair and my food. And what you did and what you just described is the worst thing you've ever said to me. And my dad is dead. Really? Not. The time I scratched my back with your spatula and you act like I shot you, I would be able to get over that. I will never get over this really, we'll never get past this one. That's so interesting. I just didn't wanna waste it. And I was still kind of hungry. That is horrifying. It was disgusting. I can't believe you fucking ate it anyway. I had to. Oh, I took it out. It's not like I was chewing the hair. No, please stop. Please stop. Please stop. Okay. It's too much. It's too much. It's much too much. I hope someone's not eating lunch right now while they listened to us. Yo, wicked. Sorry. It's funny because I went there with my friend Megan, and we went our separate ways and then I saw her at work at waitressing and I was like, so how was your, your sandwich earlier? She like, it was good. And I was like, oh, okay, good. Just checking to make sure you ate it. And then I was like, there was a hair and eye. And she's like, no. I'm like, I ate it anyway. She was also just as upset as you were. Oh yeah. To hear, hear that? I ate it. You have to tell me something else. Please purge my brain. This I was working on Saturday night and there was a couple at my, it was a three a throuple at my table and they cashed out and then they all started fighting with each other. But here's the thing. Like an actual throuple? No. So it was a mother. What? This is what I thought. Okay. It looked like a a, it looked like a, a couple around my age and a mother. Okay. I had a feeling it was a couple because the girly pops were in the bathroom and the boy gave me his card, and when he opened up his wallet, he said, oh, I hate when she fucking puts my card back in a, in the wrong place, whatever. Assuming that would be the girlfriend and which is such a girlfriendy thing to do, put it in the wrong place. You know, I'm borrowing a card, put it back wrong. You know, so they come back and on all, all three of them are fighting, but they're fighting in a way where they're coming at the mom and she's trying to defend herself and she's not making any sense. But both me, the boy and the girl, were both actively on the same level fighting with the mom. So if one of them is an in-law, that's not, that's weird. Unless he's defending. What were they fighting about? I don't know. She was like, do you, but do you understand why we think that that's, you're not listening? And like, the family says this. And I could, I kept trying to like go back, but they had already cashed out, so it was like, I'm trying to get my slip and get outta here. I was also like wicked late in the night, so I was like, I fighting bickering. So then I went to go watch them on the camera in the office.'cause I was like, what's going on? And they're both basically exhausted by this woman, and you can just tell, she's like, I don't know. I didn't do anything basically. And they're, but I, I can't get over the fact that that's obviously a couple and one of them has to be like an in-law or it's like their mom. No, they're definitely together. Those two people for sure. No, I know, but that's e one of their mothers. That's what I'm saying. And one of the, so you are saying the fact that they're both fighting with her is weird because one of them is an outlaw. Technically. Technically that's like me and John going to dinner with my mom and him screaming at my mom. That's weird. No matter what. It's, mm. Yeah. No, that's, that is totally fair. I can't imagine being with someone for a certain amount of time where they're also chiming in to the conversation. And unless it was like. Really, really, really bad. In an assertive way too. It's one thing to be like, okay, I think this is upsetting her. Yeah. Like to defend is one thing, but like Right. He was going, no, he was coming for her. Yeah. It was crazy. Interesting. Yeah. I'm not over against, so think about it. Unless you got the dynamics wrong, which you don't usually do, you usually have a really good, I think that it was, I think the girl, it was her mom.'cause they looked alike and he didn't look like any of them. Yeah. So he's the boyfriend or the partner or whatever. Yeah. And they were coming for the mom. Well, we don't know what the mom did. No, I know. But either way I just thought the dynamic was really weird. Yeah, that's crazy. And it's been, does that happen a lot to like people fight at the tables and you like try to Yeah. Weird things happen. People are crying sometimes and I'm just like, I'm like, can I get anything else to drink? Like, can I tell you, I was having a nervous breakdown one time and me and my, one of my best friends, Jessie from college, we went to this place and they have really good margaritas. And we walked in and I had my sunglasses on'cause I was so upset and I was wiping my face. Like you could obviously tell any woman would take one look at me and be like, oh, she has her sunglasses on inside. Like, things aren't going well. Yeah. And so Jessie said, why don't we sit outside on the patio? And it was like just getting nice out. And the woman came around and I was a wreck. And she goes, can I get you a margarita? Yes you can. And get a margarita and a gun. I said, I would love one. And can you do me a favor and can you make it strongest as fuck? And she goes, I can absolutely do that salt in the rim. And I said, yep. She brought me the most perfect margarita. And I was just like, I ended up tipping her like 40%. Yeah. I was like, I, I, that's exactly, I know you have a job to do. I'm not trying to like cause a scene. We were out on the patio by ourselves. Yeah. I mean, I don't care. I love the drama. But the moment we went outside and we were alone, I was like. Having a breakdown and she just came out and was like, I'm gonna get you a margarita. And I was like, thanks girl. Yeah. We love a girly that gets it. We love a girl's girl. Yeah. A girly that gets it. Yeah. I try to cater to those people, but like sometimes I'm like, you're just a fucking weirdo and an asshole and I'm not doing that for you. Sorry. Can I tell you, there were so many women who took group photos of us on this trip. Oh, that's nice. Like I tapped a girl and I go, Hey, can you, she goes, gimme your phone. She goes, I'm gonna do horizontal, I'm gonna do vertical. I'm gonna do up, I'm gonna do forward facing. And then you're gonna look at them and you're gonna make sure that all of you like it. And then if you need more, let me know. I go, I adore you. I adore you. Can I kiss you? Yeah. Can I kiss you outta the mouth? Are will you marry me? I'm not interested in you in any way, but I do. I am for a lavender marriage. Turns out also just like, why can't we be normal and just like appreciate on a normal level without being like, I would die for you. You know? Because we're women just like what's wrong with us? We're just so appreciative of nice things. Yeah. Okay. All my last thing,'cause I have done nothing but work and or lay or rot, but my last thing is Luke Comb came out with a new album and it is 12 outta 10. Yeah. Nothing really like, it gets me going when country artists start dropping shit in the spring as it's getting warmer. Like I will run through a fucking wall. Yeah.'cause it's gonna be your summer anthem. Yeah. Pop my whole pussy. Also Tim McGraw's coming the day before my birthday to Fenway and I simply could not be more excited. Oh, I love that. For you. I'll be there. Dunno who's coming. I, I am going, Jill, who's getting married is thinking about doing her Bachelorette in Vegas. And there is. A chance. I'm not saying it's a hundred percent, but there's a chance I may see Backstreet Boys at the sphere and it is also my birthday weekend. And if this comes to fruition, I will die. I will simply punish. I I might go a day early and go see Ru Ball's Drag Race live. There are two Why Vegas things on my bucket list. One of them is RuPaul's Drag Race Live. Mm-hmm. And one of them is Backstreet Boys at the Sphere. I mean, why wouldn't you? Why wouldn't I? I agree. Also, if you leave on a Wednesday versus a Thursday or a Friday, the flights are like$300 cheaper. Oh, that's nice. Because you're not, you know, you're not doing the Vegas weekend thing. That's true. Yeah. So to be continued. But we may have very nice birthday plans each of us this year. Ooh. Okay. Do you wanna stretch? Do you wanna pee? Do you wanna grab another drink? I kinda have to pee. Yeah. Sorry, I had to think about that. Do you have anything else? No. That was really it for me. That was my babbling. Thank you for staying through with me. Okay. We love listening to you. Keep smiling, keep shining. No, you can. Okay. I need a glass of wine. Do you know what we have to talk about before we get into the topic of the week? Oh, the winter Self Taylor, Frankie Paul. I have hated that bitch since I saw her on TikTok washing her hair in her bathtub improperly. So have you seen the video? Yes, I have. It's awful. No. Yeah, it's awful. I think she is disgusting also. I, there's no way Disney didn't fucking know about that video. I don't think that extensive background research Well they do on every human being. It's public knowledge. Her previous like charges. I know. So it's like, why? Here's the thing though, I have so many thoughts on this because I am not justifying anything that that woman has done. I am not a fan of that show. I hate that there, there's like, we love messy for tv, but too messy eel like, oh, oh. The the Mormon woman who was convicted of a felony got too messy for you. Like, oh, shocker. Oh, Disney, who has a family brand, isn't a fan of it. Crazy. Like all of this. To me, if you're gonna hold her to that standard though, hold every fucking else other person on TV to that standard. I would agree. I just think it's the timing the entire world would shut down. It's the timing of it. That's the problem. Oh, Dakota's a piece of shit. Yeah, but she's, there's no way He didn't release that video. No, of course, of course. It was him. A hundred percent. He's a, he's a complete dirt egg. I think if you, even those poor babies. Did you watch secret Lives Mormon wives? No. So my thing is, is like, of course there's something wrong with every single one of them. That's what I mean. It's like you draw the line at. You know, you, you don't drink coffee. This, this is, but this is okay. Like it's, it doesn't make any fucking sense. You can be a swinger and go into a K hole and cheat and beat and do all these things, but coffee, we draw the wine. That's a, that's a no, that's a no. Go get your dirty soda outta here. Also, my other thing is it's like, besides like the background check thing, like, this girl has never been stable or well and has been a problem in my brain, and it's not, not to judge her for like, having red flags, like she has multiple baby daddies. Like I just think someone that has a, a record or track record or a history in that way, it's, I'm not saying there's something wrong with her of violence, but there's just. Obviously something wrong with you. That's what I mean. Like Disney A, B, C should have known better. They absolutely, they, they chose her because they need the ratings, because their ratings are suffering. Because now there's 1000 other reality dating TV shows up. There doesn't million of the people you could have chosen that are also in the limelight that people are big fans of, they brought back nearly every bachelorette of all time and like inducted her into this thing and like made her wear a fucking matching tracksuit. Yeah, yeah. We're talking season one bachelorette to 20 whatever we're at now. Well, don't they feel bamboozled? And they were like, you're one of us now. Did you see the thing about Mara Higgins, if she ends up being the bachelorette mm-hmm. The way I will watch this show tomorrow, and I know that negates every single thing that I just said, it makes me a complete hypocrite. No, I would watch it. I am so obsessed with Mara Higgins. I don't think she'll do it. I think she's above, I think she's above it unless they're willing to pay. And also it's like, oh, now I'm your second best choice. I, I think. I don't think they can afford her, but Ma Higgins is now doing like crazy promos for some of the most luxury brands there are. I don't her a Rob spot or Birkin. I was gonna say she's, she's bing her face off. Yeah, I mean she's doing stuff for like eBay too, so she's not above certain things, but I don't know, I can't see it being her, especially where she's already done done Love Island UK and she has been cheated on a bunch, so, but like, maybe that's why it's a draw because everybody loves her right now and she like is kind of a man hater in a fun way. Yeah, I don't know. We'll, we'll have to see what happens, but I must tell you I love her. I am still watching the traders just slowly, even though I know who wins. Oh, that's so fucking good. I did not know about Miss Donna. Miss Donna Kelsey. I did not know she was the secret trainer. I was shook to the court. Me and Pona were, I'm a traitor. Everyone erupts. And I was like, they're coming for her. They need to relax with Donna. No, I was pissed. I'm so upset. I was, I was. I was like, if it's not Donna, I'm going, I'm gonna be so mad on her behalf. And she's like, you got yourself trainer. Yeah. Michael Rappaport is like insufferable but funny at the same time because he's so ridiculous that it's like comical to me. Yeah. I want when, hi. When he fights with Colton, I want your thoughts on it. Okay. I'll let you know. Him and Colton get into, I don't like either of them by the way. I, Colton or Michael Rappaport. You know who I confuse Colton with? Who? That other bachelor guy that dances on TikTok. That will not stop. Clayton. Yes. It's, I confused them. And Clayton is so annoying on TikTok. Yes. And I was like, is this really. The necessary, the X bachelor. Now gay talker and I have Fiona's, like, I have no idea what you're talking about. There's only one that we know of. And there's Clayton, so I don't know. I don't even fucking watch an idea. Bachelor. Bachelor. Oh God. Any who? Yeah. I just, I want the talks at today to stop, make it, stop hiring toxic people that we know are toxic, that have a rap sheet across the board. Men, women, people, I don't care. I don't care what the show is. Let's please stop giving these people a platform. It's just not necessary. It's weird. It's fucking weird. Okay. You ready for the topic of the week also? Sorry, last thing. Couldn't have picked any other of the Mormon wives. Well, just kidding. They're all married. I think that's their whole thing. Oh, okay. Well, that's fucking stupid. Well, she's not married for a reason because she has five baby daddies and is crazy. So there we have it. Amen. Mic drop bused with caution lock in. Final answer. Okay, so today we are gonna talk about Shayna Hub. Mm-hmm. Have you ever heard the story? Minor. It's fucking very low level. It's fucking crazy. My main source today is the Bailey Syrian episode. I watched it at the cabin with Paula, and while we were watching, it was like, oh, that's the episode you watched. I have to do this on the pod. I do have it pulled up on the big TV in front of us so that I can show you certain parts. Hey babe, I'm not even showing you on my laptop. I am pulling up the big screen for this one. Okay, Betty. Okay. Not the iPad, not the laptop. We're getting the tip, the, the boop tip. Okay. The bib tip. So let's start off. Shayna is 19 years old. She goes to the University of Kentucky. She is pursuing a degree in psychology. The irony. Okay. This bitch is fucking crazy. She is a fun college girl. She's doing some modeling on the side. She's a hottie. She's got a gorgeous bod. She has fabulous teeth. She's a hottie with the bod. She's giving brunette Barbie, you know what I mean? How rude. And in 2001, her and her friends go on spring break and they post a picture of them in their little tiny black bikinis on spring break, having a great time. And they post it on Facebook and it gets the attention of this guy named Ryan Poston. He sees the picture and he is an attorney in Cincinnati and he actually owns his own legal practice. Okay. So he's like a whole ass adult. I believe he's 28 years old at this time. Oh, so he is got a decade on, on or about yeah, about eight, nine years. I believe so he sends her a friend request and I think he must have been friends with the girl in the picture. Yeah, I was just gonna say, there has to be a mutual situation. I think she was tagged. Got it. And so he saw her and was like, oh, I know that girl and that girl's hot. So I'm gonna friend request her, because again, this is before Instagram. So like this was like the sliding into the dms type of thing? Yeah. I can't say that's ever happened to me, but No, no, no. So she sees like this attractive guy. He's older, he's successful, he's hot to her. He friend requests her, so she accepts it. Bailey says that he's giving Christian bale and American psycho vibes. I would agree. It's a bit like slicked back hair. Yeah, it's giving slimy attorney a little bit. Clean face, little slick, like American boy attorney vibes. Yes, I agree. So they're sending each other flirty messages back and forth about how hot they think the other one is. A couple months go by, Ryan ends up going to a party at the University of Kentucky with his cousin Carissa. Okay. You are 28. Time to retire. Why are we going to a college party? Yeah. I don't know if he thought he would meet her, which he does. Which is really creepy. So like success, but like what are we doing here? Well, that's the goal. That's kind of weird, but, and she happens to be friends with Shayna. So Carissa's like, oh yeah, I'll introduce you guys. They hit it off immediately. They're all over each other. They're that couple, they're like respectfully. Can't get off of each other. You hang up. No, you hang up. No, you hang up. No, you hang up. He's driving two hours from his condo to her almost every single weekend. Oh. And then when she graduates, she's doing that drive to his condo, Ohio. Was that close to Kentucky? Yes. Oh, thought Ohio was like up near Michigan. So ou it's right above it. Oh. Oh yeah. It's pretty close. All right, cool. It's really close to Kentucky. I didn't realize. It's like on the border. Well, if you drive two hours, that's crazy. From here, how far would you get? You know what I mean? Think about that. Well, yeah. No, it's different in the, the middle. The middle of Well, either. No. I mean like, if you genuinely drove two hours, you'd be like the middle of New Hampshire or like the top of New Hampshire. That's like a state over. Yeah. But New England's, we, we are weird. Yeah. Like most states aren't this close together. I I think most people, even in other countries too, like driving two hours and be able to go through three states is pretty crazy in America.'cause we're such a big country. That's true. That's true. Think about Russia. That's, yeah. Think about Russia. Russia you would get from like one gas station to the other in two hours. Yes. Like what is even happening. Okay. So they're driving two hours to see each other. There are two hot people who are dating, but it starts to wear off Orion and he's kind of over it. He's losing interest and he tells his friends like, I'm kind of losing interest in her, but it's really hard to break up with her because she's hot'cause I'm too nice. Oh, is that what it is? He doesn't say that, but that's the vibe of like, oh, I just feel bad. You know? Like, she's super into me and you know, I just don't wanna hurt her feelings kind of thing. Okay. But she is happily telling her friends that they are getting married and everything is perfect. Oh good. She even says to his cousin, Carissa, who introduced them, quote, I can't wait to be related to you for real end quote. Oh. So she is like, this is the real deal. This is it. She then starts to talk about how he is abusive and at one point she runs to a neighbor's house. Oh yeah. And said that he grabbed her and he threw her on the ground. And the neighbor was like very supportive. She didn't wanna report anything though. Shayna did it. Mm-hmm. But, and not everything is not all sunshine and rainbow. Something is not right here. Okay. Where the hell's my husband when song, so this fucking sense bay, he brings her to his mother and his stepdad's house. And like if you're trying to break up with a girl, just, you just don't do that. Just a heads up to men don't do that. It is a signal that things are more serious than they are. It's just not a good sign to be like, let's go hang out with my parents. Yeah, you're an idiot. So they went over to like watch some political event and once they're there he pulls his stepdad aside and he's like, how do I handle this breakup with her? Like, I have to break up with her. She's in the next room yapping with his mom and he's like, I gotta get rid of this girl. And he tells his stepdad it's because he's actually really excited about this new girl that he's been talking to. Ooh. And. Her name is Audrey and they've been messaging for months and they've finally agreed to meet up. They haven't met yet in person. She is Miss Ohio. Oh, so where he's been dating Brunette Barbie. This is Blonde Barbie. Got it. She is like so stunning and so beautiful. I mean, she, so he has to Ohio. He has type at this point. He has the type. So he is like getting all excited, telling the stepdad about this new girl, this miss, this Miss Ohio, Audrey. And the stepdad is like, listen, let her down. Easy. Be respectful, but like rip the bandaid. Like don't, don't like drag it along. So, he's very excited about his potential new love interests. And they leave and they go back to the condo and they get into some argument at like 3:00 AM in the morning and which is never a good sign. No nothing, no argument past 11 o'clock at night is good. No, I would argue Shayna is so upset. She calls her mom, Sharon. Sharon, God fucking bless her answers at three o'clock in the morning and Shayna is saying she has chest pains and she's not okay. Which sounds like a panic attack to me. I would agree. And Sharon is like, something is not right here. Like something is off and drives the two fucking hours to go get her, is like, I'm coming. Mothers would never we, they would never. And at some point Shayna says to Sharon that Ryan has guns laying around the apartment and he would randomly pick them up and play target practice with the guns and randomly shoot shit. Now I know we are either in Cincinnati or Kentucky, depending on what house we are at. Where is the HOA? Like who? I, I just can't imagine being in a condominium and firing a gun and no one calling the police. Like I know, I'm, I have never lived in Cincinnati or Kentucky. No, that's correct. Also, how's it not going through shit? Like what are you shooting? I don't know. I just can't imagine someone just being like, Hey, that Coke can't over there. Pew. Pew. Yeah. Like what is happening here? And we're in the wall. Right? Right. So Sharon drives to the condo in the middle of the night. Shayna agrees to leave with her. Okay. And they spend the day together and she's like, let's just go have a mother daughter day and like take a breather in a few hours after they leave Ryan texts Shayna quote, I think I need some time by myself this weekend, Shayna end quote, and she responds, quote, I'll be by later to get some bath items and head to the Marriott end quote. So this is on October 12th, 2012. Okay? Mm-hmm. Shayna's. Mom drops her off. She heads home. Everything is fine until 8 53 that night. Shayna calls 9 1 1 and she's very clearly upset. And you can hear the 9 1 1 call. I hate 9 1 1 calls, but you can hear it. And she's like, um, um, uh, I, I killed my boyfriend in self-defense with a loaded gun in the house. And the woman's like, oh, okay. So the dispatcher is talking to her through it, and then she's just like, I'm not a murderer. I just killed him in self-defense. Like, okay, no one's, no one's it. So she claims that when she tried to grab her things, he attacked her. There was a fight, there was a scuffle. He had a gun in his hand. She somehow got a hold of it and it shot him somehow. And the dispatcher is like, oh wow, do you need an ambulance? Like, are you injured? And she's like,'cause she had said something about being like thrown across the room or against the couch. And she's like, no, I have no injuries. And the dispatcher says, is there any history of domestic violence? And Shayna says, yes. And so at first the story is like he was trying to throw me outta the house. Then he was trying to throw her across the room. The story keeps changing while she's on the, the police are not there yet. This is just on the phone. Okay. Word. She's an idiot. She, at this moment, and you can listen to it in Bailey's episode, she's, I would say crying, but obviously upset in explaining what happened. It's not huge, but it's subtle enough where you can hear it. She's like, and, and I can hear an echo, like, she's mad, she can hear herself echoing on the phone. Does that make sense? No. Like there's, there's an echo on the phone call, so as she's talking, she can hear it echoing back at her. Yeah. So she's crying. Then she like gets mad. So she's like, and then this happened and then I can hear myself echoing like she kind of switches. Oh, okay. And the woman's just like, yeah, that's, we're recording the call. Like that's, it's okay. Like, just tell me what happened. But it's, it's very subtle, but you can hear it, you can hear this little like flick twitch and so on the same call she said, and okay, this is actually like really gruesome and fucked up, so if you are not into that sort of thing, please skip ahead. She says she first shot Ryan and then he started twitching. And so she shot him a few more times and the dispatcher was like, you shot him a few more times. And she's like, well, yeah, it was in self-defense. He was twitching on the ground. He was just like twitching. And the dispatcher was like, so you didn't call 9 1 1 though? And she's like, well, yeah, he was gonna die anyway. The police aren't there yet. I cannot stress this enough. This is just on the phone call. This woman is so stupid. So they get there and they get into the apartment. It's like very bachelor pad, and they find him and they, you know, secure the scene and they handle everything as they should be. And they bring her in and they bring her to the police station and they read her her rights. Yep. And she signs a waiver. She completely understands her rights. She's not under arrest. She's simply there to like, ask, be asked some questions and get some more clarity on what the fuck is going on because a 29-year-old was murdered, right? So mad. She makes it super clear. I want a lawyer, I want an attorney and the cop in the room, and you can watch it. It's that guy right there he goes, okay. I won't ask you any questions. I just need basic information to fill out this paperwork. I am talking like, name, date of birth. The condo address, like bare minimum, she runs her fucking mouth. They don't ask her questions. She just ru does not shut the fuck up. She talks about their relationship. She talks about how abusive he was and how she had to defend herself. So Bailey somehow gets footage from the interrogation room and I am gonna show it to you. I want you to describe what you hear and witness. Okay. Probably an imb, whos the word, character, witness, One of our last conversations, we had that good dentist to the mirror and wanted to get a nose dog, just that kind of person. And I shot him right here. I gave him his nose, dog. He wanted So in the clip. I, I will obviously post this in the notes. She says that she has a dentist friend who comes up and someone to do nose jobs and he wanted to get his teeth done. He was insecure about his teeth and he wanted a nose job. And she said, so I shot him in the face and I gave him the nose job he always wanted. And she laughs in the interrogation room? No, she's a psychopath. Like, is that not the craziest thing you've ever seen? She laughs I don't know how I would react across the table from her. I think I would just be like, imagine being that cop. No. Oh. Oh, it continues. Oh God. Okay. All the way, the dining room, all the way Okay, so what are you witnessing? Explain to the, to the group. A blabber mouth. An idiotic blabber mouth. Like she in Dilu land does not shut the fuck up. They're not asking her anything. No one's speaking to her. She's just talking out loud. And if you've noticed, that's the third person in that room. So people are filtering in and out of there, and she is just. Running her mouth. She says, hell has no fury like a woman scorned. She says, I don't know if anyone would wanna marry me if they know I killed my boyfriend in self-defense. And then she giggles and says, that's not funny. Even though she's laughing, she goes into how she was thrown around the room and that he did this and that and this and that to her. And she's like, I don't have any marks but my shoulder hurts and I hope it doesn't scar. As selfish as it sounds, she does not have a bruise on her. She does not have a scratch on her. She does not have blood on her. She has nothing on her body. Did she find, can I, can I guess my theory Sure. She found out about the blonde girl. Yep. And she wasn't happy about it, so she shot him. Yep. Okay, cool. That's exactly right, Colleen. Okay, cool. And there's just one more insane thing I have to show you before we end the show and tell portion of this podcast, men Towell illness. That's, that's a so what? Snap on her finger. So what did you just witness? Col. She's doing Lia and saying, I'm such a good actress. So that is a mad woman. She says, I'm a good actor. She starts humming amazing grace to herself. Very good singer. She is a great singer. She said, he called me a fucking hillbilly and she goes, yep, I did it. I can't believe I did that. And then she starts to do ballet, like pirouettes, pirouettes. Why did I say it like that? Pirouette. A pirouette. Yeah. That is alone in, now that part, and let me just say this. That part was her by herself. It's very much like the jinx. It's like they all walked outta the room and just like let her. Talk to herself in that alone. Right? How you don't know that you're being recorded is, is boggling to make. How do you not know? How do you not know? I will say too, this is kind of funny, I'm sorry, she's just so fucking stupid. She's says to the, the woman who was sitting with her earlier, if you go to jail, are you allowed to keep your phone to contact people and can you shower there or do you just get really dirty? Okay, she's gonna have a good time in prison. My girl, for sure. So the cop obviously comes in and is like, so we're gonna charge you with murder right now. The picture they use her mugshot. Someone did her so fucking dirty. Oh, that's someone did her. That's not a, she's actually a very pretty girl. Whoever took this photo of her. It is hilarious. Yeah, that's not a good angle for her For sure. We will post it. It's amazing. She's officially charged$5 million bond. She obviously doesn't have that type of money. She's held in custody the entire time. The cops obviously know that she did it. There's, there are no other suspects. She admits it essentially in the room by herself. The focus though is why, because they don't know the why yet. Got it. So those cops have to go through all of their text messages to each other. Oh, good Lord. Imagine the most toxic couple, you know, now she's 20 and obsessed with him and he die when he dies. He's 29. So like picture the most toxically. Obsessed on again, off again. Couple, you know, in a 20-year-old girl who's deeply unwell, all of their friends had had enough of them. It's all she talked about. Let's get into it. Okay. First, before we go into the text messages, they do an autopsy of him. I am gonna tell you because I think it's important because it goes against everything she tries to defend herself on. Oh, is like overkill if you do not. Oh, for sure. Overkill. If you do not like these types of details, please skip ahead right now. Okay, great. Now that those people are gone and we have saved them, he was shot six times. He was shot in the face, he was shot in the chest, he was shot in his body, and he was shot in his head and there was gun residue on his body, which means she was very, very close to him when she fired. And some of the bullets entered him at a downward angle, which means she was standing above him. Self-defense who? How did he even stand above him? Oh, I will tell you how. So they take a look at her internet search history. Oh God.'cause they're like, I can only imagine what this idiotic, stupid bitch had to have a Google search. So wouldn't you know, two days before Ryan was murdered, they came across a search history looking for Audrey Bolt. AKA Miss Ohio Bailey says that, well, actually, I'll get to that later. Another Google search was an hour before calling 9 1 1, how to unlock a house using a bobby pin. Mm-hmm. Aha. So the police go over thousands of their text messages. The cops are like, this is toxic as fuck. They're arguing, then they're talking about what to eat for dinner. Then they're sexting. I mean, it's just all over the fucking place. Something that meant a lot to her is that he always had a hot meal waiting for him. Hmm. Okay. Yeah. So even if she was out with her friends, she would text him a picture of the menu and be like, what do you want? I'll bring you something home. If he was at work, she would go over at his house and cook something. She was constantly messaging about him, about meals specifically, like she wanted him to have a hot meal. If he forgot something at his apartment, she would drop it off at work for him. So he was like, oh, I've got my wallet at home. She'd be like, no, no, no. I'll go get it. It's no problem. And would go swing by and bring it to him. She would clean his apartment, she would do his laundry. I would assume She thinks this makes her marriage material. Yeah. She's like, however I'm doing this. Right. Like, I, I am the wife of the household already. Like, I'm gonna take care of this man. Yeah. He never reciprocated one ounce of this. This was all one-sided. He never did anything for her. Got it. When things were not going well and they were fighting, he would snap at her. So. At one point he said, honey, it's not a real relationship. It's just exclusive, non touching of other girls. And she said, it is a real relationship, or I'm not in it. Okay. At least Alicia's dating around isn't like, it's okay, but, but then she would crawl back to him and like make him a hot meal. Got it. Ryan wanted out and he actually even tried to negotiate their breakup and he was like, listen, I'll say that you dumped me and I'll go along with it. But he had definitely reached his wit's end. Like at one point he said, this is an all caps Shayna. Stop texting me. I no longer have the patience to deal with you. I'm turning off the phone and pad locking the door. Yikes. She would sometimes text him 20 to a hundred times in one sitting, not in one day at once. She would send him long paragraphs about his treatment of her and how he hurt her feelings in, on and on and on. He's hanging out with his friends too much instead of her. He literally does not care. He does not care. Sometimes he just wouldn't respond to her. He was just nothing. And during he's gonna regret ever liking somebody or adding someone on Facebook ever. Well, he's murdered, so that's true. I'm sure he does somewhere, wherever he might be. He has many regrets, whether he's up or. Many regrets. Wherever he be, he regret. So during one of their rocky periods, she got a new cell phone and she pretended to be a new client who needed his legal help. So she called his office and pretended to do this like whole thing, and she got his number and she started texting him like, I need you immediately for like, I, I need urgent assistance, X, Y, and Z. And then she kind of lost the plot, like she lost her, her method acting went out the window. She flips out, she calls him stupid, ugly, bad in bad. You have a small dick, LOL, you're, oh, well your, your teeth are so jacked up, you're a bad lawyer. And Ryan's like, who is this honey? Who the fuck do you think it is? Respectfully who you think it is. I will say in the text, he's like, oh, that's too bad. I do my best. Like he's, he's like not really bite. She wants a reaction. Mm-hmm. And he's not giving it to her. Good for him. Months Before that whole thing happened where she pretended to be a client, Bailey found an email that she sent to him and in one line it said, quote, it's sad that I just wanted anything to talk to you and be acknowledged even if I had to come across as a client to get noticed. End quote. Which means she must have done it before. Yeah. At least one other time. God only knows how many times it actually was. Good Lord. So she's fully harassing him the day of the murder. She was sending him long ass texts. She said she was diagnosed with high blood pressure and heart disease. Oh. And she was stressed about a dying family member. And she is just doing the absolute most, she is scraping the bottom of the barrel to like get him to do anything and he doesn't reply. And when he finally does, he asks for personal space, like he's just not biting. Mm-hmm. Shayna's messages to her friends. Can you imagine being one of her girlfriends? No. Literally no. So she has a friend named Jasmine. I would've punched her in the face, my friend. I would lose the plot on this girl. Yeah. Jasmine is one of her friends and she lives in the same town as Ryan. Okay. Okay. So she tells Ryan Shayna. Mm-hmm. That her and Jasmine are roommates and she moved in with Ja and they were roommates and they found texts between her and Ja, where Shayna basically says like, I've, I've told him I moved in with you. And like, if he reaches out to you on Facebook, don't talk to him. She says at one point. He thinks I've lived with you all this time when I haven't. Ha ha. Who gives a fuck? He's a dick and abusive. I'm so done with his shit. Will you do that for me if he contacts you LOL? Because I think he's onto me and he thinks I'm being shady. You are. Okay. So two, clarify. She still lives two hours away and she is either couch surfing or paying to stay in a hotel just in case he calls and she can be nearby. And she is whole ass faking living with a friend that she does not live with so that she can be like near him. That's, it's crazy. There's no word for it, honestly. No, it's, it's really crazy. I know she's in her, I know she's 20. I know, but this is like next level. It doesn't matter. Like when people say sometimes, like, your brain's not fully developed man or woman at a certain age. Yeah. I don't care. You, I don't care. Your heart is still the same. Yeah, a hundred percent. And like thi this is mental illness. This isn't like, this is an obsession. This is so far beyond I have a crush on a boy or I'm in love with him. Yeah. This is like, he's literally saying, please stop contacting me. And she's showing up to his condo trying to break in like where we've lost the plot. Right. I would agree. So, she does have girlfriends who tell her to move on and she tries to date other people, quote unquote, but she turns out she's only doing it to post about them to make Ryan jealous to get a bite out of him, which she doesn't, I can assume. Nope. And so Christie is one of her best friends and she's a dentist and she comes up later. She's the one who's gonna give him veneers. Christie got so annoyed. With Shayna in just the constant toxicity in onslaught of God only knows what venting her. Venting was like. Right? She texts Ryan directly, Christie the friend, and says quote, Ryan Shayna is more upset than usual. She loves you. I have three patients scheduled at 8:00 AM So for the love of Christ, can you call her and tell that her you love her? End quote. So everyone is just fucking over it. Yeah. Everyone is over it. So it turns out that Ryan isn't the nicest of guys either. I don't wanna speak ill of the dead. He, but facts are facts. I think there's, this is just one of those things where the two most toxic people, you know, meet each other. Got it. And it's oil and fire. So he runs into his ex and he said to Shayna, she thinks I'm gonna kill her. And everyone she knows, I wouldn't be surprised if it happened, but only if I have nothing better to do. Okay. That's an exact text message. Mm. Okay. A year later, he text Shayna about the same ex and says quote, she's terrified of me. One of the reasons she originally started dating me was because she was very aware that I would have killed her ex-boyfriend at the drop of a hat, and no one would ever have found his body end quote. Oh, I think this is bravado. It's giving a bit tough guy. It is. And Bailey goes in her episode. She's like, he would do anything for me. Like, oh my God, he would kill for me. That's so cute. Yeah. Like what do you think when you're 20? Yeah. I don't know what's happening, but he's definitely struggling. He admits to his friend at one point that his depression medication wasn't working, and one night he says he took three Ambien. Oh, three Xanax, Christ, a Klonopin, and a shot of vodka. And he says, I was honestly concerned I was gonna kill myself, but I had to be in court at 9:00 AM I think you would be dead. That's correct. I think, I mean, I'm not a doctor. Your heart would stop. I don't know. I don't know what's happening here. Can we ask Chad? He's clearly sure. I love asking Chad. Let's ask Chad, GBT, the real doctor in this. Oh, she tells me, me and her. We are simpatico. Yeah, the combination is very dangerous, even for a healthy 29-year-old. You're talking about mixing multiple central nervous system depressants. It will slow down the brain and the breathing when combined, the effects don't just add, they multiply. Yikes. Serious life-threatening risks, respiratory depression, breathing becomes too slow or stops coma or death. Effects can come on within 15 to 16 minutes, 60 minutes, and worse than over a few hours. Sometimes people seem, quote unquote just asleep, but are actually in a very dangerous state. Oh. Now Chad's very worried about me. It's for a story not happening. Sorry girl. Don't worry, sis. Chad's saying it's let's just not a recipe for disaster. Let's just not do that. Like, please just don't. He was also going through a legal battle with his ex legal partner. Got it. And was very, very upset about it. And he sent a bunch of texts about he basically wants everything bad to happen to this man, but they were weirdly graphic and very specific. So he just doesn't seem well in kind of a dick. I don't think that means he deserves to get murdered for the record, but like, they just seem like two very unwell people. I would agree. So turns out Shayna would ask Ryan for his laptop to help do her homework. Mm-hmm. And when she would have his laptop, she would sign into his Facebook account, and when she would sign into his Facebook account, she would like all of her own pictures. And then she would block or delete any messages with any women. And that is how they figure out that she found out about what's her face. Audrey, miss Ohio, Aubrey. Audrey. Audrey. Audrey. So now the police have the why and the trial started two and a half years later. Mm-hmm. And she's been in prison that whole time. So it's now April, 2015. Okay. She's 24 years old. She pleads not guilty and sticks with the self-defense. It was in self-defense day one, the prosecution play, the nine one one call and the interrogation video. That's it. That's all I need. That's all that's needed. They call the police chief to the stand and he tells them she didn't call 9 1 1 first. She called her mother. Hmm. She calls her mother first, according to the call logs, and then 15 minutes later calls 9 1 1. That's a long time. And in the interrogation, she admits she wanted to flee the scene, but her mother told her to call the police. So they get all the blood samples and the evidence and they have everything prepared. But you know what really was the nail to the shayna's coffin on this one? No. What her cellmates.'cause guess what Shayna did the moment she got to prison, she's told them the truth. Guess what joke she told over and over and over again and thought was so funny? What? What? I gave him the nose job he always wanted. Ah, she told it over and over and over again. And this girl who thinks, and this is an exact quote that she is the IQ of Einstein, doesn't realize that in prison everyone is trying to get their sentence lessened and she ran her fucking mouth. So three. Also, why don't you think these people in prison wanna Kiki with you for real? Three inmates testify against her three. They claim that she said the nose joke all the time, that she was way too smart to plead insanity because she had the IQ of Einstein and she was gonna plead the battered wife syndrome and get away with murder. When she first went into prison, she claimed Ryan was physically and emotionally abusive towards her, and he sexually assaulted her. But over time, that story changed. She was also known to be taking copious amounts of notes during the Jodi Arias trial, which was on Oh Lord, in the rec Room, and was one of the channels at the prison. And she was using it as a guide on what to do, in what not to do. Mm-hmm. Now, if you do not know who Jodi Arias is, there are a lot of similarities with Jodi Arias and Shayna, another obsessed woman who kills her partner. I did an episode on her. Go back and listen to it. Hey, hey. Okay. Ryan's downstairs, neighbors, Doris and Vernon West. Oh. Bring back Doris. Vernon's tough, but bring back Doris. Doris, west Dory. Oh, come on. I know what Dory. So they were called to testify. They didn't hear any fighting or any arguing. They heard a woman crying on the balcony. They heard her go back in. They heard two gunshots, a pause and then four more and a body hitting the floor. So what they believed to happen is that she got upset. She went outside, she decided what she was gonna do. She picked up one of the guns laying around. Mm-hmm. Shot him twice. And then when he fell, or while he was falling, shot him a few more for good measure. Oh, that explains the more and got closer to him. Yep. While she did it. Nice. So Carissa the cousin who introduced them, which like the saddest, how do you grapple? How do you proceed? This is my fault. She testified about the text she got from Ryan who is airing his frustrations about Sha. One text said quote, this is getting to be restraining order level. Crazy. She showed up at my condo like three times and refuses to leave each time. End quote. That's an exact text from Ryan to his cousin. It turns out getting a restraining order in Kentucky at the time meant you had to live with them or be married to them, which is fucking insane and has changed since. But even if he, that is weird. Wanted to get a restraining order, he could not crazy. Carissa also testified, he texted her that she came by on Sunday and said, I literally had to throw her into the hallway because she wouldn't leave. Shayna also tried to take Carissa's phone because Ryan was ignoring her and she was like, give me your phone. He won't ignore you. Like, I'm gonna call him from your phone. Like she was just really unwell. Psychotic. No, she's unwell. Shayna's team Tried to prove it wasn't all that bad because she was invited to his parents' house. How does that help your self-defense case? It doesn't, they're like, they're not that toxic. Look, they're scraping. They, they spent time with the mom and the stepdad. Yeah. They're fucking scraping. Yeah. And he was plotting to break up with her in the next room. Hello. This is just an insane, just an insane thing to say out loud or text, I guess. But 10 days before the murder, Shayna texted the dentist friend Christie, quote, when I go to the shooting range with Ryan tonight, I wanna turn around, shoot him and kill him and play like it's an accident. End quote, Christie said. It was nothing more than a joke. Hmm. LOL. Funny how that panned out. I have now, I, I know that I started this episode talking about how I say, I'll kill you to death with a gun and fuck your dad. I have never heard one of my friends being like. When we're playing with guns later, I'm just gonna turn around and shoot him and I'm gonna kill him to death. And everyone just be like, girl, I mean, hindsight's 2020. I guess. I dunno. I don't know. That's a she also, she also said to Christie, who's a dentist? Something to the effect of, Ryan is begging me to ask you to do his veneers. Fuck them up so we can never get with another girl. Like you're pathetic. A clinical psychologist working with her in the prison said she was suffering from PTSD, from the shooting that she had an IQ of 1 25. Not Einstein by the way. It's 1 25 low. It's not low. Low is like under a hundred. Oh, okay. Einstein was one 60. Oh, okay. So if that gives you any inclination. But she had an IQ of 1 25 and diagnosed with bipolar and personality disorder with narcissistic features and apparently a history of alcohol and prescription drug use. Huh. Which I didn't know. No, they close up the trial. Her team tried to do the Stand your Ground law, which is about self-defense, whatever. Prosecution was like, she's a liar and a lunatic and she's obsessed and she couldn't have him and no one else could. Like, it's pretty simple. They even brought in the chair in the table and like reenacted what they thought happened, like with the bloodstains on it, like they were not fucking around and their whole thing was like he was shot, sitting down and then she got closer to him to finish the job. This was not like this was calculated. Yep. So they deliberated for five hours. He she was found guilty and sentenced to 40 years in prison with the possibility of parole after 20 years. Now you think that's where the story ends? It doesn't. Oh, oh, no, no, no. It does not. Colleen. Okay, ma'am. It gets fucking crazier. Can I ask, is she in prison right now? She is. Okay. So the case closed. She's guilty. See you fucking later. Right after sentencing, her lawyers start to prepare for an appeal, which is common, and they're reviewing court records and videos, and they're like, why do we know that juror, that juror looks so familiar, like they were recognizing him. He is a convicted felon, and those lawyers had his case almost 10 years earlier. Oh, and that doesn't seem like a big deal except a convicted felon. Cannot legally serve on a jury. How did that one slip You? You can be the president of the United States as it turns out, but you cannot be on a jury so that the judge has to declare a mistrial and she gets a brand new trial from scratch. That's annoying. So she sits in jail and she waits for her second trial. And in 2016, a miracle happens. What? Shayna meets the love of her life. Who? A woman, a trans woman named Unique Taylor. Good lord. And they apply for a marriage license through the county clerk's office. Shayna doesn't hear from the office for a couple of days. So Shayna does what any sane person would do in this situation, and she calls the local news station and she's like. They're discriminating against us and yada yada, yada. And the reporter's like, okay, I'm gonna come down and interview you. And she wouldn't answer any questions about her second trial. All she wanted talk about was the love of her life, her fiance, and them getting dis discriminated against to get married. Now you might be wondering what the fuck is happening. During this time, LGBTQ plus rights were under attack and people were openly discriminated against, if you can even imagine that. And it was dominating the news. It was on headlines everywhere. There was a massive Supreme court case in the mix. This was back, if you guys remember, like the bakery that said no to the gay couple. Like it was everywhere. So the timing felt, how do you say? Opportunistic? Yeah. And the reporter says to Shayna, is this a strategy for you? And she's like, no. This is true love and discrimination stop for my rights. So the clerk's office, they reach out to them and they're like, what's going on? And they're like, yeah. So we never denied it. We haven't processed it yet. She's crazy. It's been only been a few weeks and we're backed up. And if you know anyone who's worked at a clerk's office, everything moves at a snail's pace because no one Think of the lady from Monsters Inc. Truly everything is going as slow as molasses because they're all overworked, underpaid and understaffed. Like, what are we doing here? So she like didn't get this like big story that she wanted, but they, Shayna and Uni do get married. Oh, okay. So her team tried to have the trial moved to a new city because basically no jury at this point hasn't heard of her. It's been all over the news. They also tried to suppress the inter interrogation footage. Why? Because they said it was a violation of her rights. It's literally not. She signed up, she literally signed a waiver and didn't shut the fuck up. That's correct. Both were denied. Good. So on August 14th, 2018, opening statements are made for trial number two. I will not go into trial. Number two, I promise much of the same evidence and the same witnesses return for trial number two, but, but something's, something's a little different. Okay. Because guess who, who decides to take the stand? Who? Shayna. Oh goodness. I'm so sick of this bitch. I'm so sick of her shit. She's so smart though, Colleen. No, she's so smart. I listen. Einstein at Suck a dick. She's wearing a little tiny cardigan. You, she's gotta look frumpy.'cause I, I love when they do this during her criminal trial and it's like the big bad mafia guy who like whacked four people has to lose weight in prison. Mm-hmm. And like look shriveled in court with a cane so that it looks like he could never Yeah, it's like all about optics. They put her in a little cardigan. I'm gonna stop. And she testifies. And in her testimony, she focuses on their sex life a lot. Of course she does. She freak. And according to Shayna, when they had sex, she struggled reaching an orgasm in writing. Don't we all sometimes try having three martinis? Okay, then you can't either. Woe is me. Who am I, guys? Oh, Colleen, ryan was an asshole about it. Ryan would bring up past sexual traumas and blame her for not having an orgasm, and he made her feel bad and was verbally abusive. She says on the stand that he said to Shayna, this is the SAS paragraph I think I've ever read. Okay. Okay. Okay. I'll post 10 pictures with you. Be more affectionate and communicate with you more if you agree to a reason. Oh, Jesus Christ. And she apparently took that deal because all she wanted was his love. Like you're pathetic, but also he's disgusting. It's even, they're just both gross. Yeah. Unfortunately, closing arguments come, they bring back the chair, they do the whole kit and caboodle all over again. Same thing. Five hours of deliberation. She's found guilty of first degree murder and it is recommended that she have life in prison, which is actually worse than her original sentence. Yep. Before passing his final judgment, the judge said, quote, your actions that evening were grossly violent and intentionally calculated to cause his death. That's correct. She is convicted life in prison with the possibility of parole after 20 years served, which is like 2032 or something. Okay. After the sentencing, you will not believe this. Shayna filed for divorce from Unique. Oh no. Poor. Unique. I know. True Love. Gone Again. Oh, unique. In 2020, they filed another appeal about the media coverage in certain evidence should have been tossed out. Like, come on, fucking come on. And Shayna is now 34 and she is at a max security prison outside a Louisville, Kentucky Oh oil. Oh. And that is the story of Shayna Hubers and the murder of Ryan Poston. I would love to know what she looks like right now. I'll show you what she looks like on the stand when they put her in her little baby cardigan. Okay, cool. I probably watched this. Oh, there actually is a picture of her. Because lemme tell you like nothing beats a person down quite like prison. It truly, I would have a beard. Yeah. This is like, what am I to do without my electric shaver and my eyebrow razor? I have said to you guys many times, if I'm ever in a coma, someone must bring the electric shaver and do my chin hairs. Oh yeah. You can't be out here letting me grow a beer. But I have them like right here. No, I'm not kidding you. I would bring one of those little buzz buzz things that I have. I have one. Yeah, of course. I have one too. Oh, the, this might be the cardigan. Humble. Yeah, the cardigan. Oh, she's pretty, that's annoying. Yeah. She's stunning in a fucking psychopath. And that is Shanna Hubers. Yeah. Thoughts? It's such a shame that the craziest ones are that pretty like, like a beautiful face is wasted on a crazy person. I agree. It's not fair. And we've always said that if you could put that body and that face and our personalities, like you would conquer the world. That's correct. It's kind of rude. Like we're we're, we can't have it all. No, but we're, we are baddies. That's not, I'm not knocking us down, I'm just saying. Oh, no. Know what you mean. That, that, that's just wasted on somebody like that. Yeah. That metabolism and that face was wasted on a crazy person. Yeah. Bullshit. It's bullshit. Oh shit. Alright. What are you up to? Go to Portland this weekend for a, just like a little throw. You're and of anniversary. Stop. It's, I hate it. Like, oh. Oh, stop. It's so nice. I know you get pissed when I say that, but like, it's just like Yeah. Yeah. One year. Yeah. Kind of crazy actually. It's so amazing. It's amazing. Time flies when you're having fun. No, but I actually feel, I've known him for like 20 years, but like, not in a bad way. I know. Same. I feel like he's just always been a part of our family. Like when he shows up to family parties, I'm like, yeah, he's here. Yeah. He, that makes sense. I will say I did look for him at Aaron's party. I was gonna say, did he have fun on St. Patrick's Day? Yes, he did. We had a, we had a good time. I was giggling'cause I was like, oh, where'd he go? Not that I needed to be like, where is he? I need to find him. But he was just in the, in the chair, in the living room. Hanging out with the men. Yeah. And I was like, oh, okay. Thing about his spot he'll wander and you know, just do you never have to worry about him. Yeah. And Aaron's friends are great too, so it's like an easy no. Yeah, it's an easy crew. Yeah. He, he said the next day he goes, I just wanna go take Rudy right now. Oh, Rudy the pup. Rudy pup. Rudy Pup has arthritis right now. So he's getting up a little slower talk. I don't wanna talk about it. I know Danny was looking at him the other day and he got up really slow and Danny said, mom, I'm gonna be really sad when Rudy dies. Stop. I'm sad. That's Danny boy. Or no, he said, we're all gonna be so sad. It wasn't even about him. It was like the group, us as a family will be so sad. But he's such a good pup. He's such a good pup. Perfect. He sheds a little too much for me, but I love him. Yeah. Labs be doing that. Labs be shed in what you be doing. I've had a whirlwind of two weeks, tons of flying. I've done four loads of laundry today. I need a bit of peace, but I'm gonna hang with Paul this weekend. I'm gonna hang with Leanne. I I'm going to a family party. You won't be there, but I'll be at a family party at Karen's, so it'll be good to hang out with them. And yeah, the next couple weeks are a little crazy. So this is like my last weekend of, of just like hanging out and being local and being a local batty. Being a local batty. And I get plan a trip. Thi this filled my bucket so much. I wanna plan it while I'm on a high versus like waiting, you know, for the next week of coldness. Yeah. And being sad. Hey Matt. You know what I mean? Yes, I hear you. I hear you. I see you. I speak. Oh my God. Thank you so much. I feel so sin. Uh, That was gross. Apologize. Excuse me. Thank you. Anything else? No, that's all I got. Well, guys, sorry about the, the skipped episode, but I hope everyone's doing well. I hope you're all getting your UV rays in some way, shape or form. And if you're not, then plan a trip. I swear to you. Go, go broke. I honestly, we're all in debt. It's fine. You need, you need it. You're, your body needs it. That massage changed my life. The sun changed my life, my girlfriend's changed my life. Like go do something. I swear it makes all the difference in the world. Amen, sister man. Alright, love you mean it. Love ya. Mean it. Goodbye. Goodbye. Good day. I said good day. I said good day, sir. I said good

Speaker 1:38:53

for sippin with the Shannon's. This

Speaker 9 1:39:01

podcast was produced by me, Bridget Shannon. Music is written and performed by Matt Derosiers. You can find his band, Super Stoker, anywhere you listen to music.