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gwunspoken
We know that now more than ever, there is a growing disconnection between parents and their teens, corporates and their employees, and human interactions in general.
This can cause stress, frustration and many arguments within families and the work environment.
gwunspoken looks at the challenges people of all ages have in their relationships with one another and provides experience and advice, allowing all parties to have a voice.... and feel heard.
Join us to hear corporates, parents, educators, teens and the latest advice of how we can in fact live the life we love, in making authentic interactions, because we know... authentic connection is everything.
gwunspoken
When Perfect Sleep Becomes Your Nightmare
Sleep perfection is destroying our rest. We've created a culture where anything less than eight uninterrupted hours feels like failure, where morning routines are glorified, and where sleep trackers dictate our mood regardless of how we actually feel. But what if everything we've been taught about sleep is wrong?
This eye-opening episode challenges the two most damaging sleep myths: the obsession with perfect sleep and the stigmatisation of night owls. Through personal stories and compelling research, we reveal how stress about sleep quality can trigger cortisol release that makes rest physically impossible. Consumer sleep trackers, while helpful tools, can be up to 60% inaccurate when measuring deep sleep phases—yet we let these devices determine whether we've "succeeded" at sleeping.
Most fascinating is the science of chronotypes—your genetically-determined preference for morning or evening activity. Studies from the University of Surrey and Harvard confirm that approximately 30% of people are natural night owls, and forcing these individuals into early schedules impairs cognitive function, happiness, and metabolism. Society has wrongly equated early rising with virtue and productivity, creating a system where nearly a third of the population exists in perpetual sleep deprivation.
The solutions aren't complicated but require abandoning perfectionism. Stop counting sleep hours and focus on how you feel. Accept middle-of-the-night wakefulness as normal (historically, humans slept in two phases). Use sleep trackers as guides, not gospel. Most importantly, work with your natural chronotype instead of fighting it. Small, consistent adjustments to align with your body's rhythm will produce better results than forcing yourself into someone else's ideal schedule.
Your sleep isn't broken—your expectations might be. Try our journaling prompts to identify your chronotype and reframe your relationship with sleep. When we stop treating rest as a performance metric and start honouring our unique biological needs, better sleep naturally follows.
www.in8code.com
Welcome to another edition of GW Unspoken, where we discuss stuff we don't typically talk about but probably shouldn't. We're here with episode six, talking about sleep, and today the title is the Perfect Sleep and Night Hour Myths why chasing perfection and ignoring chronotypes is ruining your rest. What the hell is that word? Well, we'll get into that. I mean, we've all seen those people who claim to have the perfect sleep eight hours every night, no interruptions, make up feeling like a Disney princess. But let's be real Perfect sleep is a myth and the more we stress about trying to achieve it, the worse we actually sleep. Then there's a night owl versus early bird debate. Society has convinced us that waking up at 5 am means you're a high achiever and if you stay up late you're just lazy. But what if your body is literally wired to function better at night? What if the real problem isn't your sleep schedule but the world's expectations?
Speaker 1:Today we're diving into two major sleep myths the obsession with perfect sleep and the lie that night owls are just unmotivated morning people. And the spoiler if you've been blaming yourself for bad sleep, you might not be the problem. You know, I once had a friend let's just call her Sarah Sarah's obsessed obsessed with getting the optimal sleep. I mean she tracked her REM cycles, monitored her heart rate, wore three different sleep trackers and drank magnesium tea while listening to whale sounds. She did everything right except actually sleep. One night she texted me at 2 o'clock and said I'm awake. My whole day is ruined tomorrow. The irony, the stress of trying to sleep perfectly was the very thing that kept her awake. And then there's my other friend, jake. Jake always felt like a failure because he couldn't wake up at 5 am, like all those productivity gurus preach. But when he switched to a later sleep schedule that matched his body's natural rhythm, he was happier, more productive and actually got better sleep. And he's not alone.
Speaker 1:Biological chronotypes your natural tendency to be a morning person or night owl are genetically wired. I wonder what yours is. Research shows that about 30% of people are true night owls and 40% are early risers, and I guess the other 30% are somewhere in between. Yet society still acts like waking up early is a superior way to live, and this is the problem. There's lots of myths out there.
Speaker 1:Here's number one the chase for perfect sleep. We live in a culture that glorifies perfect sleep Eight uninterrupted hours, falling asleep instantly, waking up refreshed every day, but in reality, sleep isn't always neat. Sometimes you wake up at three o'clock for no reason. Sometimes you toss and turn and guess what? That's normal Sigh of relief. Right, here's the kicker Stressing about not getting perfect sleep actually makes sleep worse, and when we overanalyze our rest, our brain shifts into fight or flight mode and, instead of winding down, we pump out our stress hormones like cortisol, making it harder to relax and fall back asleep.
Speaker 1:Has that been you? I know it's definitely been me several times and a lot recently. Here's another issue All these sleep trackers on our smartwatches. They aren't perfect. Many of us wear them to bed and studies now show that consumer sleep trackers can be up to 60% inaccurate. So that's when they measure your deep sleep. That means your tracker might be telling you you're sleeping terribly when actually you're fine. Now imagine how much that plays into your brain, especially if you are actually wanting to get your eight hours of sleep every single night.
Speaker 1:Here's another myth. Myth number two Night owls are just lazy. Here's a fun fact your body has a built-in clock that determines whether you're a morning person or a night owl. It's controlled by your cardian rhythm. Now A study from the University of Surrey found that forcing night hours to wake up early resulted in worse cognitive function, slower reaction times and lower overall happiness. Another study from Harvard found that forcing yourself to wake up too early, before your natural rhythm, can increase stress and even lead to metabolic issues over time. So no, you're not lazy if you hate mornings. Your body just runs on a different schedule. So what's the real issue? The real issue is society is built for early rises, most jobs and schools start early, and it forced night hours into a permanent state of sleep deprivation, especially our teens. It's not that they don't want to sleep early, it's that their bodies literally won't let them.
Speaker 1:So what's the solution? Here's number one Stop the sleep math. We've all done it. If I fall asleep now, I'll get exactly six hours and 42 minutes. But counting sleep hours often fuels anxiety. So, instead of fixating on a number, shift your focus to how you feel the next day. Some nights you may get only six hours, but if you feel, fine, that's the real thing that matters.
Speaker 1:Here's another solution. Number two Accept middle of the night wake-ups. Waking up during the night is normal. Historically, humans used to sleep in two phases, with a period of wakefulness in between. So, instead of panicking when you wake up, try this Don't check the clock, let your body relax naturally. And if you wake for a while, do something calming. So maybe some light reading with a dim light or some deep breathing, maybe some muscle relaxation. Do that instead of stressing. Here's another solution. Number three ditch the tracker obsession. Sleep trackers can be useful, but if you wake up feeling great and your watch says, hey, you slept badly. Trust your body over your device. Remember sleep trackers estimate data. They are not foolproof. Use them as guides and not gospel. And four embrace your chronotype.
Speaker 1:If you're naturally a night owl, stop trying to force yourself into a 5am schedule. Instead, work with your body. If possible, adjust your routine so you sleep and wait times match your body's natural rhythm. And if you go to work or school and it doesn't allow that flexibility you can maybe have some gradual shifts in your bedtime. Maybe 15 minutes increments per week can help reset that rhythm for yourself without shocking your system.
Speaker 1:Here's another myth Focus on your consistency, not perfection. Instead of chasing the perfect eight hours, aim for a consistent schedule. We talked about this before, about having a schedule that's consistent and your bedtime routine can actually help you grow into a better sleeper. So going to bed and waking up at the same time every day trains your rhythm, make it easier to fall asleep, naturally. Here's the last one Reframe your mindset on sleep.
Speaker 1:Instead of viewing sleep as a performance metric, treat it as an experience. Some nights will be better than others, but that's okay. By taking the pressure off yourself, you can allow yourself to actually have more sleep and make it happen, naturally. So test yourself, try some of those solutions, especially if you're a bad sleeper and you've got a high, stressful job or you're stressing out for your school. See if those make a difference in your mindset. So here's some calls for actions.
Speaker 1:We talked about journal entries, so here's three for you now. Number one, and again, I just really would love to persuade you to write these down Again. Writing them down does make a bigger difference. So, number one reflect on a time when you stressed about sleep. Now, did that stress help or make it worse, and how can you reframe your thoughts next time?
Speaker 1:Number two do you rely on sleep trackers? What would happen if you ignored your sleep data for a week and focused only on how you feel instead? I'd love you to try that one and get your comments back for that one and lastly, identify your chronotype. Are you a morning person or a night owl, or are you somewhere in between? How can you make small changes to your schedule that align with your natural rhythm? I'd love to hear some of your thoughts around this and see if that does make a difference to your sleep, especially when you're worried about maybe getting your eight-hour sleep or your optimal sleep. Let's go by feel rather than the time and look again. Appreciate you choosing into or tuning into this sleep episode number six, and we look forward to number seven when we talk about the ultimate sleep routine and maybe what the best sleepers do differently to help you get your natural sleep. Thank you.