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gwunspoken
We know that now more than ever, there is a growing disconnection between parents and their teens, corporates and their employees, and human interactions in general.
This can cause stress, frustration and many arguments within families and the work environment.
gwunspoken looks at the challenges people of all ages have in their relationships with one another and provides experience and advice, allowing all parties to have a voice.... and feel heard.
Join us to hear corporates, parents, educators, teens and the latest advice of how we can in fact live the life we love, in making authentic interactions, because we know... authentic connection is everything.
gwunspoken
Every Parent's Struggle Is Part of a Larger Story We Don't Talk About
Ever wondered why your child's behaviour triggers such intense emotions in you? The answer might lie not in your parenting techniques, but in your own childhood experiences.
Sam Jockel, founder of Parent TV and producer of the award-winning documentary SEEN, joins the GW Unspoken podcast to explore how healing our own wounds transforms our parenting. After reaching over 30,000 Australian parents through 300+ community screenings, SEEN is finally coming home to Redcliffe, where much of it was filmed and where three of its four featured parents reside.
The documentary challenges conventional parenting wisdom by shifting focus from controlling children's behaviour to understanding parents' emotional landscapes first. "Our kids need something from us that they don't know how to ask for in the right ways," Sam explains, noting that when those needs aren't met, children's behaviours often wrongly become labelled as "the problem." This revolutionary perspective places the parent-child relationship at the heart of human development and mental wellbeing.
What makes SEEN truly powerful is its portrayal of ordinary people showing extraordinary courage. These aren't celebrities or experts, but everyday Redcliffe parents brave enough to confront their past trauma, shame, and generational patterns on camera. Sam describes them as "heroes" whose stories create "a container and scaffolding" allowing all parents to acknowledge their struggles with a collective "me too." This shared vulnerability breaks isolation and creates pathways toward healing.
Despite addressing difficult truths, the film balances honesty with profound hope. As Sam puts it: "We can't cherry-pick just the good bits of being human. When we try, we get taken over by the bad bits." By embracing our full emotional range and approaching ourselves with compassion rather than judgment, we can break cycles affecting generations.
Join us for this special screening at 1 Richens Street, Redcliffe on Saturday at 3pm (doors open 2:30pm), followed by a Q&A with Sam and participating parents. This free event, supported by Uniting Care, Redcliffe Uniting Church Community Hub, and City of Moreton Bay, offers a rare opportunity to participate in a parenting revolution happening right in our community.
www.in8code.com
Welcome to another edition of GW Unspoken, where we discuss stuff we don't typically talk about, but we probably should, and I've got two very special guests on the line. I've got one person across from me, tim, how are you?
Speaker 1:Very good, thank you. Thanks, gary.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I've got Sam on the line. How are you, sam?
Speaker 3:Yeah, good, good, glad to be here.
Speaker 2:Well, it's our privilege. Actually, we're going to get into speaking about you in a moment and what the great attractions that's coming up here in Redcliffe on the Peninsula, but First of all I want to drill down on Tim. Tim, can you let us know just a brief of your position and where you are at the moment?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So on the Redcliffe Peninsula I'm connected into Redcliffe Uniting Church and Uniting Care and my role here is youth and community chaplain and so I get involved in lots of different community events. Yesterday we had a technology safety day, lots of stuff around the homelessness and mental health and, yeah, supporting the community however I I can.
Speaker 2:So yeah, also, and we've known each other for probably a couple of years now and people out there who's listening will know that he's a very humble man. He doesn't like accolades very much about himself but does a massive amount for the community, a lot of his own bat, which is huge. But let's talk about today. You've invited us in today to talk about um sam sam jockel and give us a brief rundown about what's happening then, and we can maybe we can quiz sam. It was. So what's going on there?
Speaker 1:yeah, fantastic thanks, gary. Yeah, so I've known sam for a number of years almost just over 20 years and, um, and seeing some of the work that sam's done has been really inspiring. Um, and we don't have time today to go through all of the different entrepreneurial, different ventures that Sam's done, but also, yeah, contributing and supporting the community and and knowing Sam's family for a long time as well. So, yeah, when the vision of this documentary that Sam's been working on I got to know about this, it was like this is such an important topic, such an important message that we've got to dive into and, yeah, I just wanted to support it as much as we can. So, yeah, we've been on a bit of a journey over the last how long would it be, sam? Probably about 10 months of bringing together a whole bunch of different projects and activities and ideas and, yeah, really looking forward to the screening this weekend.
Speaker 2:And Sam, we just want to get you involved here and talk about so. We'd love to hear some dirt on Timmy. We'll leave that to another time, but you're coming here, I believe, on Saturday. Yeah. And you're going to be screening and launching the scene film. So do you mind just taking us a bit around that?
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, no worries. So I mean, scene is probably a piece of work that was two years in the making to actually produce the documentary, but sometimes I say maybe 17 years in the making since I became a parent myself. Um, and we looked at about I don't know three months ago now, um to, I guess, the public, and I mean since then we started with kind of 15 across the country and we've now had over 300 community screenings and I think over 30,000 parents have seen the film. Um, and really it was a big piece of work very centered on, um, I guess, parenting, but really looking at it through a different lens, and so not on, not only am I the producer of scene, but I also founded a company about 10 years ago called Parent TV and that is a little bit like Netflix for parenting resources and there's over 2000 videos on that platform, but they're just kind of five minute videos really just answering questions parents are asking about parenting.
Speaker 3:And it was through that journey of, I guess, founding Parent TV probably having three children myself that are now 17, 15 and 11, that I really started to see there was more going on than just how our kids were behaving. That was shaping what was happening for our kids, and I think you know a lot of the narrative around parenting. A lot of the content around parenting for a really long time was very much focused on our children and their behavior and trying to get them to behave differently often, so we didn't have to feel our feelings around that. But this documentary is really, you know, bringing to the light of day and a different lens of what does it mean to look at parenting and actually looking at us as the parents in our behaviour, rather than being focused on the child, and really that piece of work around kind of understanding how did we get here and a little bit of what happened to us as kids as well and how that might be showing up in kind of family dynamics and really when, if we really want to help our kids, the first place we have to start is actually really supporting and helping ourselves as a parent. So it's a bit of a conversation about that, I think, and just really bringing to the light of day what does that mean? How does that work? Um, and that piece around healing kind of generational trauma, um, yeah, and it's, you know, really resonated Like we the documentary has, we've won awards, we've been in festivals Like those 300 screenings have literally been driven by people in community, similar to what Tim's doing here in Ratcliffe.
Speaker 3:But the beautiful thing about this film and Ratcliffe is like I'm the producer of the film and I live in Ratcliffe, have done so for 20 years, and three of the parents out of four of the parents in the film actually live in Ratcliffe too, and like half of the film was filmed in Ratcliffe. So when people see it, I mean for me that really you know this is our place, this is our lives, this is our lives, these are our people and, yeah, I'm excited to be able to have the screening tomorrow here. This is the first actual screening in Ratcliffe I believe that we've had as a place where you know so much of this story is actually real to this place.
Speaker 2:So good and I guess the way you talk to me at the moment or talking to us at the moment is it feels like you know, when you get on the plane and they say that you have to look after yourself first when the oxygen mask comes down, to make sure you can help those around you, and that's sort of the message.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to get at that parent wellbeing. If you don't mind me asking, I'd love to know the passion, the drive like where did where did parent tv originate? Like, why did you start founding these programs? What was the thing that inspired you to do that?
Speaker 3:yeah, um, sometimes I think I've done businesses my whole life, kind of never actually worked for anybody. Ironically, that's my new like curiosity. I'm having a job, but that's a whole other thing. I think somewhere in my brain and the businesses I've always run have also somehow being connected to a problem I'm trying to solve in my life. So I've just been very efficient in going.
Speaker 3:This thing needs my attention and I don't know how to give it my attention with all the other things I have to do in my life.
Speaker 3:Oh, I know how Turn it into a business, because then it's your work and also it's this problem that you're trying to solve. And I think early on, like when I had children and I like became a mother, I do actually feel like something wasn't right and there was always something within me that was like there's something I don't understand here that's really important and I really need to give that my attention. I don't think it was like a super conscious thing for me at that time. I really honour that, sam, because I'm like oh, that was amazing that you knew enough to do something and you had no idea what you didn't know. That I know now, 20 years down the line. So I'm like like I liked her. You know she went after trying to solve problems and really had no idea what she was getting herself into or what she was about to uncover in you know, caring about this. So I think it to be honest, I think it really started with me trying to.
Speaker 2:Yeah, as a mother.
Speaker 3:Yeah, like, and knowing this job that I have is really important and acknowledging, on some level, I need help, and I think I projected that onto other people, like, oh, people are, you know, like the truth is.
Speaker 3:I think it started with oh, I can see that people are really struggling and need help with this, like, I'm good at helping people, I'll do something, and which landed with. I actually was really struggling and needed help with this and once I realized this was my work to do and I did that, that's. You know, I feel like the work I do now is much healthier because it's not because it's um, I just see more clearly what's going on. But yeah, I think I just realized early on this was really important and if I've learned anything through all the research and all the work that we've done and the documentary, I was actually right. Like the foundational brain building blocks of humanity, of us, of our kids and of us, is actually embedded in the parent-child relationship and it's heavy to actually say that because that's a big responsibility and something that I think we're not hasn't been really clear, but is becoming clearer in terms of some of the research and what we're just starting to unpack and discover about the importance of that.
Speaker 3:And I think, like with two working parents now often out and the shift in what that environment looks like for our kids, we are actually starting to see the impact of that now in terms of this big wave of kids, with lots of mental health issues going on and a whole range of different things. And I think part of what's happening is we're starting to see there was actually that was an important role. There's an important thing going on there that we kind of missed because as society we tend to not really value things that aren't productive and don't make money and we have to really face what does that mean? That there's actually these really important things that if we don't get right, the consequences are actually quite substantial and like a rethinking needs to happen around that. I mean.
Speaker 3:I think that's all part of the conversation, but I don't know. I think I just trusted myself early on, to be honest, that there was more going on here that needed my attention and I don't know. And we're starting to see that's true, like our kids need something from us that they don't know how to ask for in the right ways. When they're not getting it, it often comes at us in you know behaviours that say you're the problem, this kid is the problem, but it's like no, there's actually something going on behind that and it's our job, as the adults to you know to know, to try and help them understand that rather than just get angry at them for that.
Speaker 1:Sam, you've been courageous your whole life.
Speaker 1:You have dived into a whole bunch of stuff headfirst, with a lot of bravery and a lot of courage, and just hearing you share some of that, some of your story and some of the vision and the message behind some of this the scene film it does take courage, and seeing the film, the four parents that are involved in this show so much courage, so much bravery, not just sharing their story and being so vulnerable with some of their experiences in parenting, but to go on that journey of growth, personal growth and healing and transformation for themselves and their families. So I'm wondering if you can reflect on that and also, I guess, the people that are going to come and watch this screening tomorrow, saturday afternoon. There is an element of it does take a lot of courage to dive into your own childhood trauma or your own coping mechanisms and a whole bunch of stuff. And so, yeah, can you reflect on that, of that bravery that's required from the parents involved in the film, but also the parents that will come and see the film?
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely. Look, I think this is the biggest and hardest piece of work that any of us can do, really, in terms of really being honest about what happened to you first and how that felt and what that resulted in, and then, at the same time, holding maybe how you pass that on, because we pass it on until, unless we acknowledge it, then it's just passed on, because we're just running that without the acknowledgement of it. Um, and it's often in the lead, um, and I mean the three parents in the film like part of the reason they're from rick cliff and is because you know the people. I know they were my friends, they were the heroes in my world of people that I knew everyday parents you know they weren't well resourced who were brave enough to face the flames of. You know the hard stuff, the pain, um, the shame, and I witnessed them over years. Do that? And I guess I watched TV like everybody else and always see these heroes of stories with all the things and all the celebrity, and I'm like, no, I think there's more going on. I think there are actually amazing heroes out there who nobody even knows who they are. Some of them I know and you know it felt like a privilege to be able to shine a light on some of those people who I feel like are actually extraordinary, brave and courageous humans, but also wanted to show people what's possible, that these people are just like the rest of us. In some ways there's nothing special about them, but there's nothing special about any of us that isn't about them. But we're all just in this together and I feel like for me, this movement is a little bit like me too, like it's every single one of us. It's not like there's nothing wrong with any individual and I think when you start to get your head around that it's all of us and we've all been hurt and hurt other people. It takes the power away from thinking there's something wrong with me while everybody else is fine, because I think a lot of people feel like that, that it's just them. But the more people talk about it and bring it up, it kind of creates a container and a scaffolding where it gives all of us permission together to say kind of me too, and then the power of often what is holding us back or what is in the lead and driving us to sometimes not be at our best starts to break, and we can do that together and so I don't know, I just encourage people.
Speaker 3:The film is really filled with a lot of compassion and a lot of hope. So you know, the feedback that we've had about it has been you know, there's a lot of truth-telling and people have liked that, and sometimes truth-telling can be quite heavy. Of truth-telling, and people have liked that, and sometimes truth-telling can be quite heavy, but held at the same time as those truths are also um, so much compassion and so much hope and so much possibility and it's all in there. And I just said that's the full human experience. Like we can't cherry pick just the good bits and when we try we just get taken over by the bad bits.
Speaker 3:Like part of our job is to understand what does it mean to be human? And it means love and joy and shame and grief and jealousy and it's all of it. Like it's all of it for all of us and it's about welcoming it and leaning into the hard rather than just trying to say, not those bits, just these ones, because that, like you are to think that you have, to think that you can control. That is like the ultimate liable, that none of us are actually in control of any of it. In a way, life will happen to us and our job is to welcome it rather than try and control it. And so, yeah, I don't know, there's just lots in there. The doco, yeah, it's just a beautiful story of four parents who said, uh, who were honest and open and courageous and vulnerable, and it shows what's possible and what's on the other side of doing that. And I think, you know, those are the stories that inspire me me, and we've put that out in the world to, I guess, hopefully inspire others too.
Speaker 1:Yep, that's great. One of the first things I can remember when I saw it for the first time and thinking it is confronting as you dive into your own experience, as you're watching it and thinking about reflecting on your own life and parenting. But there was this one line at the very end. That was that hope that there's always hope that you can change the situation or you can change the course that you're on. And yeah, so it is a fantastic documentary, very, very well done. But it does provide some amazing hope that we can change the course and find personal growth and healing that can impact our families.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely yeah, yeah, so yeah, yeah, I'm looking forward to it and also also coming from a local, I can't get better than that. So, and um, obviously we appreciate your time, sam, for coming on the podcast it's such a late notice. But also we can promote the community to get people out here to actually, you know, to actually understand their own journey, to maybe give them some tips and tricks and to realize that you know that word hope, but also that we are all just learning and to be the best person we can. We do have to look after ourselves.
Speaker 3:So I can't wait.
Speaker 2:So Saturday it's all on here at 3 pm at 1 Richmond Street at Redcliffe. Can't wait to meet you and Tim. You'll be here, obviously, to help on the ground and welcome everybody in, and there's a Q&A as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So if people wanted to arrive from 2.30 onwards, we're going to have some food and some. Yeah, you can register from 2.30 onwards. Screening will start at 3. Yeah, and then we'll have a Q&A with Sam and some of the parents before some food at the end. So fantastic event tomorrow afternoon. And if I can just acknowledge yeah, acknowledge the work of Uniting Care, some of the Redcliffe team have put this together, along with some of the people from the Redcliffe Uniting Church and Community Hub, and also thanks to the City of Bourne Bay for a financial grant that has made this possible to be free.
Speaker 2:Yeah, fantastic.
Speaker 2:And Sam, I just want to thank you also for getting Tim on the podcast. I've tried for two years but since you've come along we've eventually got him on it. I've got a couple of pictures of him so you can see. It's actually him across from me right now. Bit of a start of something new. He's a natural. But, sam, can't wait and love your wealth of knowledge, love how you talk from the heart and even humble enough to talk about how it's. Come from your own beginnings, where you know obviously you've delved in, yes, to make a business out of it, but it's out of your passion to be a better parent and also to serve others, so it's just beautiful.
Speaker 3:So thank you. Yeah, no worries, thanks for the chat Look forward to seeing you tomorrow.
Speaker 1:Thanks, Gary.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Thanks, Sam.