Sharing Silence and Attuning to Spirit with Ingrid Lakey

How can we cultivate a relationship to communal silence? How can practices of silent worship allow us to build trust and open to the unknown?

Ingrid Lakey, co-founder of Earth Quaker Action Team, talks with Dwight about her journey to a public-facing role in environmental activism, the power of collective action, and the ways silence allows us to attune to Spirit and embrace a multitude of truths.

Read the transcript of this episode.

–

Ingrid Lakey has been a trainer and facilitator for 25 years, leading workshops on anti-racism, diversity, team-building, non-violent direct action, and conflict. Almost 14 years ago, after the birth of her child, she gave up a career in public radio to follow her leading to be a climate justice activist, becoming one of the founders of Earth Quaker Action Team, a grassroots organization building a just and sustainable economy through nonviolent direct action. She is a member of Central Philadelphia Monthly Meeting and lives in West Philadelphia, four blocks from where she grew up.

The transcript for this episode is available on https://pendlehillseed.buzzsprout.com/

----

The Seed is a project of Pendle Hill, a Quaker center, open to all, for Spirit-led learning, retreat, and community. We’re located in Wallingford, Pennsylvania, on the traditional territory of the Lenni-Lenape people.

Follow us @pendlehillseed on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and subscribe to The Seed wherever you get your podcasts to get episodes in your library as they're released. To learn more, visit pendlehill.org/podcast.

This project is made possible by the generous support of the Thomas H. & Mary Williams Shoemaker Fund.

Transcript

Ingrid Lakey  0:04 
I have never felt like the physical expression of silence in this way. It was profound. The police officers turn their radios down. Whether you knew exactly like what was happening, everyone just settled.

Dwight Dunston  0:30 
You're listening to The Seed: Conversations for Radical Hope, a Pendle Hill podcast where Quakers and other seekers come together to explore visions of the world that is growing up through the cracks of our broken systems.

Dwight Dunston  0:42
I'm your host, Dwight Dunston. This season, we're exploring the practices that enrich our connections to ourselves and to each other. How do we cultivate relationships and spiritual community? How do these relationships and practices support our work for liberation and justice and transform our sense of what is possible?
 

Dwight Dunston  1:07  
Our guest today is Ingrid Lakey. Almost 14 years ago, after the birth of her child, Ingrid gave up a career in public radio to follow her leading to be a climate justice activist. Ingrid has been a trainer and facilitator for 25 years, leading workshops on antiracism, diversity, team building, nonviolent direct action, and conflict. She is one of the founders of Earth Quaker Action Team, also known as EQAT, a grassroots organization building a just and sustainable economy through nonviolent direct action. She is a member of Central Philadelphia Monthly Meeting and lives in West Philadelphia, four blocks from where she grew up.

Dwight Dunston  1:50 
I'm so excited, Ingrid Lakey, to have you on this season of the podcast, the seed conversations for radical hope. We have been in community and in connection for years. I want to start where we often start with our guests here on the podcast by just asking you what's it like being Ingrid Lakey today?

Ingrid Lakey  2:16 
Well, I mean, what's on top is just overjoyed to be sitting here with you. I've been enjoying The Seed and so grateful for this ministry that you've brought through Pendle Hill and feeling excited and joyful. And also, I'm feeling pretty deeply humbled. I feel like I don't know. I think it's the part of that I experienced, like many do of like, what can I possibly have to say that could be important? And then I remember that actually being in relationship, being open and real. That is actually what we need in the world. And so if we get to have a conversation in public like this, and that's what it is, then that's what it is, and feeling grateful for that. On my way in today, I stopped and visited a tree and put my hand on the tree because I was feeling a little scattered. The quote that came to me is "I contain multitudes" by Walt Whitman. That's the piece that I'm holding right now: that I contain multitudes, which is that feeling of joy and gratitude to be sitting here with you today, and I'm also in tremendous pain, because I have a friend who's really struggling. And I have a family member who's in jail. You know, there are wildfires burning. It's the truth of all of that. That's the multitudes. That's actually the reality of being human and being present with the truth of all of that. So while I can feel deep pain and sadness, I can also feel deep joy and gratitude. I'm trying to hold all those pieces in a real way. In a present way.

Dwight Dunston  4:06 
Yeah, I just had this image come up, we often spend time on your back porch in worship. There's something I think a lot about in worship of the ways that a space can hold, a worshipful space can hold, the multitudes of the multitudes. Yeah, you know, of the people that are gathered in, in the spiritual space.

Ingrid Lakey  4:28 
One of the things that happens for me sometimes when things are hard, is I start to believe that I'm alone. I start to believe like, it's all on me. And it was just in like, leaning on this incredible tree. That I was like, Oh, wait, I'm actually connected. I am not alone. I can handle this because we can handle this. Because we.

Dwight Dunston  4:51 
I want to get into your work and the origins of Earth Quaker Action Team in a bit. But I'm curious if there's another experience that comes to mind where maybe you felt isolated, you felt disconnected, and something about your environment or something within you that clicked and reminded you that no, I'm connected, I can do this because there's a we here, we can hold this, we can do this together.

Ingrid Lakey  5:18 
I'm having this little like storm of moments. Of course, just a lot of different memories. Remembering when I was trying to get pregnant, and you know, I was really wanting to become a mama, and wanting to have the experience of being pregnant and giving birth. It was a very hard path for me. I remember sitting in meeting for worship and just praying about it. And then really feeling this held space in the meeting. It was just this profound silence that was there that some Quakers called a covered meeting. I just felt such a sense of whatever will be will be, and you will be okay. And there was some kind of grace that felt like it came over me. Part of that, I think, was that I was surrounded by my community, my spiritual community, my Quaker meeting. And there was something that just on a deep, deep level, I knew that I was going to be okay. So that's one one piece.

Ingrid Lakey  6:26  
And then there are times, you know, in many, many different actions that have been part of nonviolent direct action, where there's been some feeling of uncertainty, or where it feels like something's shifting this kind of an energy. There's one example I'm thinking of right now, which is I was part of this group I'm part of, Earth Quaker Action Team. We did an action as part of the KXL pipeline, trying to get at that point, President Obama to say no to that. And so we did an action at the State Department building, the federal building in Philadelphia. There were about 200 of us there, several of us were risking arrest. One of our leaders, Lina Blount called for us to settle into silence. I have never felt like the physical expression of silence in this way. We're on this huge plaza, like spread out over this plaza. I was like on the other side of the plaza, and I didn't even hear the hear her say that's what was happening. But it was like a wave that came across the plaza swept us into prayer into silence. It was profound. Like police officers turn their radios down, whether you knew exactly like what was happening, everyone just settled, dropped down a level. And we held that silence. And then I think maybe it was Lina who started singing out of that. That was another time that I felt the presence of Spirit within us and among us, holding us in our work.

Dwight Dunston  8:05 
I want to think about our stay with your relationship to EQAT, being at those foundational conversations of the creation of this nonviolent direct action organization. 13 years ago, you made a very intentional choice about being in a more public facing role. And I'm curious about your discernment process around that decision, how you were listening to Spirit in making this decision about your relationship to EQAT and yet being in this role where you were going to be very visible.

Ingrid Lakey  8:42 
So I had had this whole career in public radio, which I just loved, I adored it. And then when I got pregnant with my kid, I decided I wanted to take a year off. But at the same time, there was this like rumbling among Philadelphia area Quakers around climate change, and what are what are we called to do? We started having these like gatherings in people's living rooms, and we were doing planning and organizing and, and then we became clear, like, oh, no, this is a real thing. We actually are creating a campaign. And we're going to create an organization that's going to be able to hold this campaign and move this work forward. Then you need to have like a board, and I was like, Well, I mean, like, I don't have a job right now. So I joined the board, and effectively became like, sort of the first director. So it wasn't a paid position. And I didn't need it to be, but as we were moving forward, and so I was providing a lot of leadership and a lot of time in creating this organization and getting a campaign going. Some of that is connected to ego. There is a way that like I had kind of created a place for myself in public radio, was building a name for myself. Part of what was helpful for me is that I had more more awareness of that there's more work to do, right? Like, this isn't just the one place that I have meaning in my career, that was not the the one place where I got to have meaning. And one of the things that was hugely exciting to me about the way that equate was doing our campaign and the way that we were functioning, the way we were being, was seeing ourselves as building--some people are going to react to what I'm just about to say--

Dwight Dunston  10:32 
That's my favorite kind of statement.

Ingrid Lakey  10:35  
We were kind of building a nonviolent army, right? We were trying to build capacity. So that was part of the fire for me. It was absolutely about taking on climate change. But it was not just about like, I'm going to just do my little part. It was really like, how are we going to build our capacity, and make ourselves as big as possible as individuals, and as a movement? What gives me hope is how many people are like, Alright, I'm ready to throw down, helped me build those muscles. And let's do it together. None of this is about like, how do I go off and be a martyr? How do I, by myself, take on these forces? It's all about collective power. It's about seeing my own empowerment. And the group. How are we taking on these systems of racism, of economic injustice, of climate change, of all of these pieces? How are we showing up as our biggest selves with love at its heart?

Dwight Dunston  11:33 
Yeah, it makes me think about EQAT, Earth Quaker Action Team. Though it has Quaker in its name, there are many people who come to that space who aren't Quaker, who come from different faith backgrounds, or no faith backgrounds. But I've experienced this, and I would love to hear your thoughts on this, of people coming in and seeing power in the silence, power in this reverence through silence.

Ingrid Lakey  11:59 
When we started EQAT, we were really clear, we were not intending for it to be like just a bunch of Quakers, right. I mean, a bunch of Quakers is great, but it's not enough to fight climate change. But we really did want to draw on the legacy of Quaker history that really was taking on power structures, we were wanting to draw on a legacy of Quakerism throughout history, and also there's something very powerful about current day Quaker practice. And so we wanted to have a space that felt we could overtly do those things, and have it be a place that you didn't have to like, know the secret handshake, to be able to participate. There is no secret handshake, just to be clear. Part of it is actually that silence, we try to sort of explain what it is that we're doing. But also, I think, for many people, there is a way in to experiencing silence, right? It's, it's not that we're telling people you have to you have to experience silence in a certain way, or you have to do a certain thing. It's a space of openness. That's probably what people who aren't coming from explicitly Quaker experience, connect with. It's that place of openness. So whether you call it Spirit, or God, you could have any number of names, or no name, for what that is, that's happening. But there is something that you can feel when you're with a group of people in silence. And it may simply be because that's so outside of the norm of our experience in this culture. You can't even sit on the subway and it'd be silent, right? Because almost everybody's listening to something or on the phone or whatever. So there's almost nowhere that you can be with other people where you're in silence. There's something about that, that is inviting, inviting another kind of attention. Partly because it's different. And because there's space in it. And maybe it's also still awkward and weird and stuff like that. So, you know, the two multitude, multitudes! That's right. It can be many things all at once. But that there is space for people to be in their own experience, while also there, there's a group level experience. That's happening too. And sometimes in that silence, someone will speak out of the silence, there's something that they feel really led to share, and the group can hold that that's part of the group experience. And sometimes it's just silence. For some people that might be just that they're experiencing it as a relief to have some quiet. For some people it might be a way of like dropping in, dropping down another level in their own ability be present. That concept of waiting worship. This idea that we don't know the answer already, right, that's the reason we sit in silence It's not about a dogma, it's not about so I can learn the rules. It's really like I am opening myself to what is to be revealed, what is yet to be told, or an invitation to even see in a new way--something beyond what in the busyness of life, I have the attention to grasp.

Dwight Dunston  11:59 
Yeah, I'm really struck by how your reflections are a contradiction to how we're socialized to show up to a space and think we have all the answers and come really put together and come knowing what to do. And what I hear you saying, and how I've experienced silence myself in Quaker spaces, or spiritually held spaces, there is an unknown that we're actually all opting into in settling into the silence. That's really profound.

Ingrid Lakey  15:53 
It is, and I think there's something that's a relief about the honesty of it. We don't know. There's lots we know. There's lots we don't know. There's something that's deeply honest about slowing down and saying, there are things we don't know. And so let's listen. Let's just listen for a while.

Dwight Dunston  16:12 
 Yeah. Even saying we don't know, feels like it feels both like a simple statement. But it actually for me, it feels very prophetic to say that. I'm curious of your thoughts, as you hear the word prophetic, or even these two words together, 'prophetic witness.'

Ingrid Lakey  16:33 
It's a tricky phrase, because I know I have some baggage around like 'prophet,' things like that. I also have some like baggage around the word witness, because so much of how witness gets talked about in our culture is like you're just watching something, right? Like you've just been a witness to an accident or something. That is one version, but prophetic witness, that is another level. This is a phrase that I think sometimes has maybe lost its power. But speaking truth to power is prophetic witness. It's still a very powerful phrase, to me: speaking truth to power I feel very, very deeply, and to me, is a spiritual matter. It is why we founded Earth Quaker Action Team, holding those who are profiting from climate change accountable, and demanding that they change demanding that they stop. That's a part of prophetic witness that is different than saying, 'I see you doing a bad thing.' It's another thing to say, 'And I will stop you from doing a bad thing.' We started with a campaign against PNC Bank, which at that point was one of the largest funders of mountaintop removal, coal mining, we found ways to disrupt their business. It took five years and 125 actions, but we eventually got them to change their policy and stop funding mountaintop removal coal mining. It wasn't because we just had a vigil. It wasn't just that we say 'Hey, we see you.' It was also 'And we are going to get in the way of your ability to keep doing this harm.' That's a part of prophetic witness. It's a direct intervention of some kind. One of the things that was fascinating in the sort of that first few years with equate, one of the actions that we did in a recurring way during the PNC campaign was we would actually hold Meeting for Worship in bank branch lobbies. A group of us would go in and we'd sit in a circle on the lot in the lobby, and have a Quaker Meeting for Worship. Which, on the one hand, you could be like, Okay, that's weird. Or you could be like, how does that really disrupt business? But you'd be surprised how much it really does disrupt business when there's a group of people doing something you do not expect in a bank lobby. It did cause a disruption. One of the things that was really powerful, I remember one of our founders Gail Newbold talked about this, she said, 'The thing about a Quaker Meeting for Worship, you can turn any space into a worship space.' For many of us who may have a belief about where praying happens, or where worship of whatever kind happens. We were having this experience of saying worship is happening here because we are doing it, and that includes in a bank branch lobby. Through doing this work with EQAT, I mean, and in my personal life, too, but I think a part of this is the reality, that Spirit is always present, whether we are aware of it, whether we are paying attention, whether we invited spirit in, Spirit's there.

Dwight Dunston  19:46 
You know, like the nobody likes the uninvited party guests, right?

Ingrid Lakey  19:52 
So, for me, like a part of that is in our actions. We're bringing attention to something that's already true, which is that Spirit is already with us.

Dwight Dunston  20:03 
I mean, it's perhaps the same thing that happens when you drop down into the silence, right? You can, you're more attuned that Spirit is there and working. The antenna is up in a way where, for me, maybe if I'm not in silence, or I'm not still like, it's hard for me--my antennae is picking up all sorts of other frequencies and distractions, a lot of static. But if Spirit is truly always there, then it becomes less about how do I reach for grab spirit? Or like, call it in? And it's more about how do I ensure that I'm attuned or am open to receiving what it already is present?

Ingrid Lakey  20:44  
Right. And to that point, I don't believe that spirit is in charge of my life. There are people with different beliefs around that, right? Like, I think I still am the person who's making a choice A, B, or C. And the question is, what am I paying attention to, in making that choice? And am I able to like filter out some of the static, which sometimes includes my fear, so that I'm not responding just from this blank place of fear? But if I can remember Spirit is with me, that allows me to be present to the real choices than just a reaction.

Dwight Dunston  21:36 
I'm wondering, as we close, if there are any practices you would offer to listeners if they were looking to, say, build community. Maybe not build a nonviolent direct action campaign, but I think so much of what you named around the origins of EQAT had to do with building community from the heart, from that love-centered space. Or perhaps it's a practice around learning to sit with silence, learning to be in the silence space. Also an invitation to hear any closing thoughts from you, as well.

Ingrid Lakey  22:09 
One of the practices that I have found really helpful is to try things and then debrief it. I live in West Philadelphia, and there was a rumor this was a few years ago, during the racial justice uprisings, that the Proud Boys were coming to my local park. All of West Philly was like showing up, I was really trying to think about what might it mean, to be in confrontation with a group like the Proud Boys, for me as a non violent practitioner, as someone who's deeply committed to nonviolence as a spiritual matter and as a strategic matter. What does it mean to show up when there's not a group level agreement about that? So I called a couple of friends. So we met up on my back porch, we had some silence, we had some shared worship, and then we went down there. And it was like a chance for us to say like.. and some stuff did pop off, the Proud Boys never showed up. But it was really important to go and be explicit of like, I want to go as a learner. I want to go and track what's happening for me, on a mind, body, spirit level. And so we went to this thing, and then we came back to my back porch, and we debriefed. What is it that we were we experiencing, what questions that we have, what was coming up for us? What assumptions, what biases came up. You know, like, a chance to break it down. Because I think that's where so much of our learning happens. And again, doing it with people that you trust, right. And also by doing that is a way to build trust with people. So that's a practice I really recommend is, is actually to try things in a thoughtful way and a planful way, in in a supported way. And then to debrief it. We learn so much from our own experience if we pay attention. The other actually, Dwight, I feel like I learned from you. You were really the one who introduced me this idea that really, you could just call somebody be like, 'Hey, can we sit? Can we just have some silence together?' For people who are wanting to cultivate a relationship with silence, it's one thing to do that by yourself, and sort of be in a meditative place. But even just inviting two friends, one or two friends to sit with you. So set a timer for yourself and start with five minutes, and then go to 10 minutes and see how that goes. And then talk with the person you're with about what that was like and what you're experiencing. That is such a contradiction to so many messages in our society about how we have to muscle through and be by ourselves and figure it out. Our liberation is not there, but it is in the like, 'Hey, will you sit with me?' And remembering whatever anybody's belief system is, that's cool. You're not alone. That's the bottom line.

Dwight Dunston  24:57 
Ingrid, thank you for letting your life be a testimony. It's always a blessing to be in space with you, to hear your stories, to be in the presence of your experiences. Thank you. Thank you.

Ingrid Lakey  25:13 
Yeah, I just feel incredibly honored to be invited to be here with you today. I just am so excited about all the things that people are learning and figuring out and finding ways to share with each other. So, bring it.

Dwight Dunston  25:28 
Bring it.

Dwight Dunston  25:40 
The Seed is a project of Pendle Hill, a Quaker center, open to all, for Spirit-led learning, retreat and community. We're located in Wallingford, Pennsylvania, on the traditional territory of the Lenni Lenape people. Visit us at pendlehill.org. 

Many of our guests are teachers, leaders, and speakers at Pendle Hill, and we host workshops, retreats and lectures all year round. For full list of these upcoming education opportunities, visit pendlehill.org/learn. 

This episode was produced and edited by Anna Hill, with production support and advising from Peterson Toscano. Our theme music is the I Rise Project by Reverend Rhetta Morgan and Bennet Kuhn, produced by Astronautical Records. 

This project was made possible by the generous support of the Thomas H. and Mary Williams Shoemaker Fund. 

If you're finding these conversations meaningful, you can support our work financially by heading over to pendlehill.org/donate. And we would love it if you can subscribe, rate, and review us wherever you get your podcasts. It helps us to continue planting these seeds.

Feel free to get in touch with us by emailing podcast@pendlehill.org. You can follow us @pendlehillseed on all social media platforms.