Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes
Tired of hearing “just put yourself out there” when it comes to friendship or community? Same.
Friendship IRL is the podcast that skips the fluff and gets real about what it takes to build meaningful adult friendships and lasting support systems. Whether you're struggling to make new friends, maintain old ones, or just want people in your life who really show up, you're in the right place.
Each week, host Alex Alexander brings you honest conversations and tangible strategies to help you connect—for real. You’ll hear stories from everyday people (plus the occasional expert), learn what’s working in modern friendships—and what definitely isn’t—and walk away with ideas, scripts, and action steps you can actually use.
Think of it like a coffee date with your wisest, most encouraging friend—the one who tells the truth and hands you the playbook.
🎧 New episodes drop every Thursday. 💬 Want to share your friendship win or struggle? Leave Alex a voice message at AlexAlex.chat.
Follow along on Instagram or TikTok @itsalexalexander and join the movement to rethink how we build connection, community, and friendships in real life.
Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes
Let’s Talk Chosen Family
If you’ve listened to this podcast before, then you know the concept of the chosen family is very important to me personally.
Some people in my chosen family play a variety of roles. Some play just one. Some are back-ups; others are back-ups for my back-ups. Cumulatively, it all adds up: today I feel more supported than I ever have in my life.
I’ve talked about chosen families in other episodes – including Episode 16, about my friend Jeff’s, and Episode 19, about my own – but I’ve never done one like today’s, which delves deep into what a chosen family is; why it’s important; and how to build one yourself.
Chosen families are the people who catch you when you fall but also help springboard you to the next level. Even if you already have a strong familial support system, this matters: you could still be part of a chosen family for someone else.
Whether you’re building a chosen family out of necessity, like I did, or by choice, they matter. They make our lives richer, our support systems stronger, and our worlds a little bit better.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
- What a chosen family is: people who choose you through their words, intentions, and actions (with you choosing them back)
- The fallacy of the “all-or-nothing” mindset of the chosen family and the different roles chosen family members can play: big, small, medical, etc.
- My breast-cancer scare and how I leaned on my chosen family while I had to wait for the mammogram and ultrasound
- Celebrating holidays, birthdays, vacations, and milestones with chosen family members and how to create traditions with them
- Ways we can support our chosen families – plus, the power of specific support offers (helping with a new baby; driving someone to doctor appointments, etc.)
Resources & Links
Listen to other episodes about chosen families, including Episode 19, “The One for Little Alex,” and Episode 16. Also be sure to listen to Episode 12, about my Roots of Connection framework.
Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!
Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!
