The REALationship Method
The REALationship Method is a comedic podcast about dating, relationships, and advice, blending tips with plenty of tangents. With stories and experiences shared by the cast and guests, it offers cautionary tales to help you avoid making the same mistakes. So sit back, relax, and maybe learn a thing or ten!
The REALationship Method
Introducing Children to a New Partner, Celibate Green Flags & Getting 86'd w/ Anu
What happens when the right person comes along after you've given up on dating apps? Anu returns to the Relationship Method podcast with a refreshing love story that defies modern dating norms. From meeting through mutual friends to consciously taking things slow, she shares how her current relationship differs from past dating experiences.
The conversation takes us through Anu's journey of finding someone who respects her boundaries and understands the delicate balance of introducing children into a new relationship. Unlike many modern connections built on physical attraction first, Anu explains why choosing celibacy until establishing a deeper connection has actually strengthened their bond. Her partner's respect for this decision stands out as one of many green flags she's noticed—a stark contrast to her previous dating experiences with a Navy serviceman and others who weren't ultimately compatible.
Between heartfelt relationship insights, Anu shares the hilarious story of getting banned from a local nightclub after defending a friend that escalated into a "squabble" during an early outing with her now-boyfriend. Rather than being deterred by witnessing this chaotic side of her, he stuck around—further confirming she'd found someone worth investing in. The episode closes with powerful advice about shooting your shot, being authentic, and communicating clearly about relationship boundaries: "You can't get mad at somebody for acting a certain way if you don't set those boundaries with them."
Ready to rethink your approach to relationships? Listen now and discover why sometimes the best connections happen when you stop playing games and start being genuine. Follow Anu on Instagram and TikTok to continue following her refreshingly honest relationship journey.
• Taking relationships slow can lead to deeper connections
• Meeting someone organically through friends versus dating apps
• Introducing children to a new partner requires careful consideration
• Setting clear boundaries early in relationships avoids misunderstandings
• Finding someone who respects your decision to be celibate initially is a green flag
• The story behind getting "86'd" from a nightclub after defending a friend
• Why being authentic matters more than playing games
• Dating multiple people is fine if everyone understands the situation
• Communication is key to avoiding misunderstandings in relationships
• When to "shoot your shot" and how to handle rejection
oh god, okay, here we go. Five, four, three, two, one. Welcome back to another episode of the relationship method podcast. I am chris and today I have one of my faves coming back on. Uh, you know her as anu, I know her as mama bear, I know her as the um, the girl that works with the, with one of them lime green sweaters. I'm not gonna tell you.
Speaker 2:Tell you their her occupation I got me a pink one. Oh, she got a pink one now.
Speaker 1:Okay, cool and um, last time that we were on she was going through some, uh, single face shit, and now she has some news for us. So I don't know. Welcome back on the podcast. Yay, man, hell yeah, how you being girl, I've been good yeah, you were. You've been good. Yeah, yeah, wink, wink, nudge, nudge. And she hooked your boy up with some coffee today and, um, this is the first, so she popped my first coffee. Uh, drop off cherry.
Speaker 2:So thank you gotta love smiley face too shut your ass where, oh was that was the dude.
Speaker 1:Was it a dude or a girl?
Speaker 2:it was a dude at the window of course it was a dude.
Speaker 1:Hey, shout out to the um the guy that hooked her up with a smiley face. Do you have a smile face on yours too?
Speaker 2:no, I gotta. Thank you very much.
Speaker 1:What kind did you get?
Speaker 2:Strawberry acai.
Speaker 1:That's why, okay, what did you think of the cups going from the plastic to paper? Not a big fan.
Speaker 2:Not a fan, but I understand it, respect it.
Speaker 1:How do you understand it? Break that shit down to me Save the turtles.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, okay, okay, I'm guessing guessing oh, you're guessing, I don't know.
Speaker 1:Biodegradable save the planet okay, I get it, I get whatever.
Speaker 2:I honestly, yeah right, I honestly don't give a fuck, um man, what you been up to living life living life uh still on the west side no, I was never on the west side, no I mean like with um uh, living life with the guys on the west side you like, on the west side that's what I mean it's a white-eyed boy oh, so you are living with a guy from the west side?
Speaker 1:oh, why not? Okay, so last time we were um, we were on, you were single.
Speaker 2:Correct.
Speaker 1:Mingling, but you weren't on the apps because I remember you telling me you got off. Yeah, what changed all that? I believe it was. I'm going to say at least what seven, eight months ago, five months.
Speaker 2:I think it was last I saw you was in March or April.
Speaker 1:Wow Of last year, okay, almost a year. Wow, a lot of things change. I mean, you're still the same height. Still the same height, you still got your tan on girl.
Speaker 2:Still got my tan Babies are still good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yes, babies are delish, yes, so tell me, how are you? Like first of of all, how did it happen, from you being single and a man? Finally, you know, taming the beast.
Speaker 2:He applied that pressure.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:Okay, no, so I actually Met him from Going out. Everybody knows I was in my little Going out phase. Yes, okay. So I met him Through mutual friends and nothing happened.
Speaker 1:And then six months Went by and then we just reconnected and it was a wrap from there really, um, is this one of those guys where like say you made out with and you tapped him on the show's like, nah, not, it was he one of them no, we didn't even make out oh, okay, it was it was very wholesome.
Speaker 2:The first time I met him was very wholesome.
Speaker 1:Really Gentleman-like.
Speaker 2:Also, he wasn't going out looking to mingle with anybody, okay, he was just going out with his friends to have a good time, type shit, that's good yeah.
Speaker 1:So throughout that meeting you came along and, hey friend, this is Anu. Anu, this is friend who shall remain nameless. Yep, okay, good, good, good.
Speaker 2:He knows who he is.
Speaker 1:Oh, I know right. Does he live on his own or is he with the parents or cousins or roommates? He lives with family. Okay, that's good, that's good. Next question is do you have your toothbrush or your clothes at a spot already?
Speaker 2:We haven't had sleepovers.
Speaker 1:Good, that is good. Take your time, girl. Yeah, take your time. Oh, that's cute.
Speaker 2:We very much so are Like I think that's what's different is we are doing it slow.
Speaker 1:Okay, doing different uh-huh is we are doing it slow okay and what right, what's what's slow and right to you like, um, is it the whole, uh, the whole chivalrous thing and all that?
Speaker 2:well, okay yeah, really found a good one in wine eye.
Speaker 1:Let me tell you is he a construction worker as well no, but he is a blue collar man, so okay he does that type of stuff.
Speaker 2:I don't know exactly what he does, but he's working hard.
Speaker 1:I know a lot of parents would like to know have the kids met him yet? Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:We went to the carnival together. We went to the movies together with the kids.
Speaker 1:Was the dynamic good? Good, was he weirded out because you have kids or anything? Does he have kids? He has?
Speaker 2:a daughter, so okay, okay it made it easier oh but yeah, like there was no pressure for him to meet them yeah, like he understood all of that because he has his own kids, so it makes it easier okay yeah, the kids did meet him.
Speaker 1:How do they feel about him?
Speaker 2:Well, my daughter? She don't like nobody.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:But my son got along with him pretty easily.
Speaker 1:And his child with you.
Speaker 2:I haven't met her yet.
Speaker 1:Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 2:But I will today. Oh, wow I mean like we talk on FaceTime.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Me and her. But today will be the first time how old is? Um is his little girl his daughter is older than my kids.
Speaker 1:I think she's six okay, so she understands the dynamic which is why, even more so.
Speaker 2:We took it slower on that's good and oh, that's real good.
Speaker 1:And um what else was good, was I gonna ask okay uh, we, I had this discussion with um several people. Um, when it comes to like say you know you guys are going down, you know this path of being together. Um, if he for do you do, can you foresee him forcing you to, like have a relationship with his daughter or vice versa? And if so, um, would you force that upon him or would it? Would you let that happen?
Speaker 2:naturally um probably let it happen, naturally okay just because I don't want to force a relationship with anybody yeah, definitely adults anything I think that good things will take time. Uh-huh, and even if, like she was, she's really not standoffish like she was really from the beginning, like he had conversations with her and she was like she's very smart for how young she is and she was just like well, as long as you're happy, then, like she asked him, like are you happy? And we're like whoa, six-year-old clock okay but she like.
Speaker 2:So when I did talk to her on facetime and stuff, she was just like I'm so happy for you guys like this and that. So I think that made it easier for me, like I don't need to force anything.
Speaker 1:He doesn't need to force anything yeah and my kids are young, so they'll just grow up being around him and so how are the, let's say, the baby daddy and his baby mama? Is there any issues with that?
Speaker 2:My baby daddy, no issues. That's good, that's good I don't really know how his ex feels about it, because we also didn't tell anybody. Oh, like you know how we were, my posts were like yeah, super discreet, you didn't see his face Like. I think, for Valentine's Day was the first time I posted him and actually tagged him, and so a lot of people found out who he was.
Speaker 1:But yeah, that's him. Really, was there friends and family? Did they know prior to the Valentine's Day post?
Speaker 2:My close friends and family did know. So the people who are really important to me knew. Obviously, our friends who introduced us to each other knew. Uh, we went out a couple of times with each other and our friends. So the people who knew, knew, knew okay, ah, the mystery man is revealed.
Speaker 1:Okay, and um, we're gonna backtrack. Now, before you met this guy, you told me that we're gonna get t-spoked. Uh, you told me that you were. Um, I'm gonna say, uh, getting established. Yeah, okay, you're talking to someone and he was in the military navy yeah navy. Yes, I'm not gonna to. Yeah, no names. Why didn't that pan out?
Speaker 2:Okay, well, let's backtrack to when I first met him which was like a year ago, like last January.
Speaker 1:So this is before you came on the podcast.
Speaker 2:Before I came on the podcast yes, Nothing was serious, but you knew him.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:So my friend, yazzie, like introduced us because her boyfriend at the time was on the same ship as him, and so that was when I was going through my I want to be in a relationship but also I don't know phase. So yazzy just was like why not just email this navy guy and you can like get to know him?
Speaker 1:she said email him yes, oh because they're on the ship.
Speaker 2:They're on the ship, they're on deployment when she like tried to play matchmaker. So we like emailed and I didn't like it, like I didn't fuck with it at all the whole emailing thing. Yeah, okay because what am I gonna? Be sitting on my phone fucking refreshing my email yeah and then like wasn't feeling it so that didn't work out. They came back from deployment in like february and his first day back, like he texted me and then he was like, oh, but I'm going to go out with my guy friends.
Speaker 1:Understandable, I mean they just. But you two were Okay.
Speaker 2:Excuse my finest pardon. You want to get to know me, but you want to go out with the boys who you were just on a ship for seven months with.
Speaker 1:My finest pardons. I like that. Keep going. That was a good one. I'm no cap. That was a good one.
Speaker 2:But so I was just like, oh okay, go out with the boys. Then, even though you just saw the boys and you guys were out, I mean, yeah, you guys were working, but I know you guys be going out when you're on deployment. So I kind of ghosted him and it was like that for like three months where we would talk, I would lose interest, wouldn't talk to him, something would come up, he would text me.
Speaker 2:I would text him back Completely ghost him again, and then I finally, I think it was his birthday you gave in and I told him happy birthday and then he, like, asked me out again, so I finally went on a date with him.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Which was like eight months, nine months later, and then we were getting to know each other. He was a cool guy, he was very sweet, he was a gentleman, but we just didn't click. Okay, I just think it just didn't work. Plus, he was leaving for deployment again.
Speaker 1:As a Navy person. They are on the ships like at least nine months out of the 12 months a year.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and like they have like duty and stuff, so he's on a ship for like 24 hours.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Talking to them. Sometimes they got to go do their thing. So he leaves for like a week and then we're back to emailing and stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But he was a really sweet guy. I just think it was a just our personalities, didn't. Oh y'all clashed a lot. Not so much clash, but like the first time we hung out he was wearing shoes in the house and I was like oh wait, was he a white? Boy. He was a white boy. Oh, of course, yeah.
Speaker 1:I reckon.
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:Is he one of them?
Speaker 2:white boys like down yonder type no but like I, just I was like take your shoes off.
Speaker 1:Oh, he's like oh my bad. And I was like take your shoes off.
Speaker 2:Oh, he's like. Oh my bad, and he would like he would try to accommodate that, but I just think our differences. I was getting like little aches. But it wasn't anything to like start big fights about or anything like that. It just didn't work out.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:And then he was leaving again on deployment. So I was like what is the point in even trying to.
Speaker 1:But yeah, he did try oh well, well, kudos, uh, kudos, kudos, whatever kudos and kudos yeah, kudos to him for even trying. He didn't like play on you or anything, right it, just the thing um the whole you and him situation just fizzled yeah, okay and like that's good.
Speaker 2:He came to like my birthday party and stuff and there was like he didn't really mesh with my friends either was he the only white guy there?
Speaker 1:that is why, um, I've gone to a couple, um, uh, island folk hawaiian birthday parties and I tell you, uh, it's a different dynamic because, uh, you know, I'm brown so I could get along with people, but I could see how, uh, a non-brown person would go into a party and everyone's like who the fuck is this? You know?
Speaker 2:but also like didn't say hi to them, like oh, okay kind of just stayed by himself. When we were in the club, Everybody was asking him do you want a drink? And he was like no, oh, so your birthday was at a club.
Speaker 1:It wasn't with, like, let's say, at a picnic type area or anything. Club.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, no.
Speaker 1:I was in a club. Oh, you and your, is your club day still popping happening?
Speaker 2:No, this man's got me back inside.
Speaker 1:Really. I'm in bed by 9 pm. Do you miss the club days?
Speaker 2:I don't, you don't, I don't.
Speaker 1:That's really good.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:And is this okay? Well, we're not going to talk about your old man's now your new man. Is he older than you, or?
Speaker 2:He's yes.
Speaker 1:How old is too old? 10 years, 20 years?
Speaker 2:No, I'm just kidding, oh snap, no, he's the same age as me.
Speaker 1:Okay, that's good.
Speaker 2:His birthday's in July. I'm in November, so yeah, are you?
Speaker 1:was it signs? Are you into that, like the birthday signs or the? I mean I know I'm a sagittarius sagittarian. Is that what you're gonna?
Speaker 2:say no, I was gonna say sagittarius oh, and what is?
Speaker 1:he don't know I think he's a cancer you say july, july leo no it's early july oh cancer oh, he's like me yeah, we're crabby and then we go on our shell and then we really don't talk about our feelings a lot, yeah, so watch out for that I can see that yeah, like we bottle things in and then. But the good thing is is, when we bottle things in, we, we, our outlet is, uh, it's productive, it's a productive outlet. So if he's mad he'll probably like build a house or something, or, or you know, I'm saying or build a shoe rack or go to the blue collar man yeah, he'll make something.
Speaker 2:He'll make something if I see him tinkering away, I'm gonna be like, are you okay?
Speaker 1:and he's a local boy, yeah he is a local boy oh, and you wanted the. You wanted a local boy.
Speaker 2:I wanted that local white-eyed boy and you got him, and I got him.
Speaker 1:When you were, let's say, in the talking phase with your current boo, were you thinking of future and beyond future? Is that what kept you down with him?
Speaker 2:I think so.
Speaker 1:I think we had that conversation. Oh, you guys conversated about that?
Speaker 2:like well, like what are you looking for? Like what? Yeah, like um like, let's say marriage or more kids, or getting a home together or apartment, whatever the case, like we didn't go into depth, like that, but it was like we don't want the fling, we're not into that kind of thing. We both have kids, so figure it out, what do you want?
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:So I know how to proceed with this, like if I want to even keep you around or not.
Speaker 1:And then he gave you a game plan.
Speaker 2:Pretty much yeah.
Speaker 1:That's good, good for him. Yeah, like for thinking that far ahead with you. Yeah, cause I know a lot of relationships they have and it's bad to say they have expiration dates. You know, and people don't want to think that, but I mean honestly they do. So that's what I'm asking you like, do you see an expiration date on this or this guy's a long term, unless you know he does some stupid like make out with a guy, but then you said it making out with the guy's. Okay, yeah, I you do you boo?
Speaker 2:do you, I mean you best not Making out with a guy is okay. Yeah, Do you boo? Do you? I mean you best not be making out with nobody but me at this point?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, do you.
Speaker 2:We don't judge, we listen.
Speaker 1:We listen. All right. Here's one of the questions and I'm not going to your other one the stages in the beginning of the relationship. Was everything, everything like good in the very beginning, like, did you found any aches that you didn't like, but you like okay, you know what.
Speaker 2:I could live with this I don't think he's given me any aches yet that's good, that's good, which is surprising because I tend to I know I? I like to overanalyze things. Why is he doing that? But he hasn't given me any aches, which is wild.
Speaker 1:Right, okay.
Speaker 2:But no, yeah, I can't think of anything that.
Speaker 1:No red flags, no, nothing. A lot of green.
Speaker 2:A lot of green.
Speaker 1:That's good.
Speaker 2:Like when I told him, like I don't want to do nothing. I want to be celibate with this one. I want to be celibate with this one. I want to see where it goes. You know, he was completely like. That's cool. Like, like I said, I haven't even been talking to females for the past year, so I'm chilling Like red, green flags, green flags all around.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Is that? Is it really a green flag? Like if a guy is not into the whole physical thing anymore and it just straight into your.
Speaker 2:Oh he's into it, but he like he could wait. Yeah, that's good, there's no pressure. He understood where I was coming from.
Speaker 1:He's very respectful it is in my soul.
Speaker 2:That's what really made me like even more.
Speaker 1:So wow, like oh, that turned you on a little bit more yeah, because sometimes they'd be like, oh no, we'll see about you know how they're like.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because sometimes they'd be like oh no, We'll see about it. You know how they're like, we'll see about that.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 2:I'd be like blocked.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay. Well, when that day comes, boy, hey, if you're watching and listening, you finna get it. That's a lot of pent up shit. This is going to come off a little gross, right, but since you guys aren't knocking the boots, do you mind if he's like masturbating?
Speaker 2:Do what you got to do.
Speaker 1:Okay, at least it's not with someone else, it's him yeah girl Okay. Okay, okay, okay, you know what? Because I know.
Speaker 2:I mean, I understand it. You know me personally. No, I'm not doing anything.
Speaker 1:But if you gotta do what you gotta do, then yeah, to relieve the tension with himself, not with other people, but with himself. He's like okay, you know what she looking good, I gotta go home, babe. Uh, let me call you back in five minutes, because that's all I need. Ah, babe, how you doing? We good, we good. Oh, I'm good now, thank you. Thank you, you don't mind that at all. Hey, kudos to you. I know women that is like totally against the whole masturbating thing because of the you know. Uh, they think of that as cheating a form of cheating.
Speaker 1:But I mean, if you're sending him picture, are you sending him pictures of yourself? No, all he has is a picture of yourself. Okay, so I mean, but it's okay with him to do what he's doing. Do what you gotta do Cool because the real thing is coming soon, my friend. It is coming soon.
Speaker 2:I also like, haven't asked him like.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, you shouldn't.
Speaker 2:I just don't think that I need to know. You don think that I need to know, you don't. I don't as a man. No, I'm gonna lie you jacked up. No, I'm not gonna ask him like you, just do what you gotta do and thank you for being patient with me.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's girl.
Speaker 2:I'm happy for you well, let me find out. I mean, I probably would have a different answer for you find out that he's masturbating.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Oh god okay I would like to think that it wouldn't bother me good clear browser dude and I know he's gonna watch this too I know I'm gonna make this a clip clear your.
Speaker 1:It's gonna say clear your browser for real.
Speaker 2:I'm hooking him up you know what I'm gonna call your fbi agent on your phone.
Speaker 1:We about to get oh dude, uh, nah, man, nah, what if? What if he was a? Uh, what if his name wasn't like his real name? What if he was an undercover person?
Speaker 2:that would suck it would be my luck oh, wouldn't it be your luck?
Speaker 1:huh, it would be my luck.
Speaker 2:She always has like bad luck with these guys right, oh, an undercover hitch or whatever.
Speaker 1:I could just see anu now on the news. Hey, this motherfucker told me he was this, this and this I promise I did not know he was a russian spy.
Speaker 2:Okay exactly. Oh god, I knew he was a little light skinned, but I didn't know it was.
Speaker 1:That's funny, that is funny, just to think about it. That's funny. That's funny, oh girl. Okay, here's one of the questions how do you feel about the people that talk shit?
Speaker 2:Okay, we got to go into depth with it. Like, what are they talking shit about?
Speaker 1:You know what. She didn't even tell me, but you know her and she sent you a lot. Um, uh, yeah, how do you feel? Okay? So, in general, how do you feel about people just talking shit about you?
Speaker 2:talk shit get hit talk shit, get hit.
Speaker 1:Okay, um, just right off the bat.
Speaker 2:It really depends, like what are you talking shit about? Because okay, yeah to me if you're like talking about a situation that's not really talking shit uh-huh and I think if people see it as somebody talking shit, then maybe you should change your shitty behavior oh, and she looked at the camera too.
Speaker 1:Okay, um, has this ever happened to you? Uh, because my wife was telling me a story. She went out clubbing and, um, it's at this place, next to the Pearl City Mall. What do you call it? Pearl Ridge? It's on the second floor of 7-.
Speaker 1:Fowler In the food court no no, no, no, Not in that place, but it's right near there, though. But on the bottom floor it's like 7-Eleven Teddy's, and then if you go around the back there's another parking lot. Oh, I've never been there. It's where all the locals go to, okay, well, anywho, she went clubbing with her friends. Some girl jumped her coworker because she was pretty. Is that a known thing?
Speaker 2:That's crazy. You're a real hater for that. Pretty girls don't fight like that. I would just say are you that insecure?
Speaker 1:yeah, wild, jumping somebody because they're prettier than you is embarrassing right, right, because, uh, she told me, because it happened that night. She got the call that night and I was like, oh, what happened? She's like, oh, one of my co-workers got jumped. I was like, oh god, what happened? Was she like on a guy? She's like no, the girls just came up just like, hey, you're that pretty girl on the on the internet. I was like, wait, hold up, is there any more context to that? She's like no, that's, that's all I got. You're that pretty girl on instagram. And then she got mopped and I was like, oh god, that just sucks, that's embarrassing, that's embarrassing, that's crazy getting jumped because you're pretty or embarrassing girls who jump, because a girl is pretty.
Speaker 1:Yeah, why? Why do you think women especially like in Hawaii, why do they do that?
Speaker 2:You asking the wrong girl because we're making friends with a pretty girl Hello.
Speaker 1:Yeah Right, I mean there's. There's a lot of ups to being friends with a pretty girl.
Speaker 2:I mean, why not? But that's wild, I don't know, Well, I must not be that pretty, because I had never been jumped in public for that.
Speaker 1:Well, they probably know you.
Speaker 2:Maybe that's why I swing back.
Speaker 1:Oh, I know you would, I know. Can I ask you what is a TLB?
Speaker 2:Typical local boy.
Speaker 1:Typical local boy, and that's the type of boys that you like that I love that you love okay well, I am a tlg typical local typical local girl um, that acronym. Is that a thing like if I walked around with a mic and said, hey, are you a tlg? Would they know what that is? Or tlb?
Speaker 2:I only found out what a tlg was from my friend who's from maui, so I don't know if it's like a maui thing oh, okay, okay, okay or what. But like when I've said tlb to people, they're like I don't know what is that okay, so I don't think it's like in a wahoo thing, I think it's like a maui thing.
Speaker 1:Oh, wow, yeah, when's the last time you went to maui. The last time you went to Maui.
Speaker 2:The last time I went to Maui was for my sister-in-law's graduation. Hey In 2023. 23. Yeah, Mm.
Speaker 1:Congratulations. Late, belated, sorry.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she a D1 athlete now.
Speaker 1:Shut up For real.
Speaker 2:She just had a softball game yesterday that we watched.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:So I took my kids to go watch her play. Like, even though me and the dad are split, like I'll still go to her things I think I did see a post of that.
Speaker 1:That's what's up.
Speaker 2:That's awesome yeah, so like his dad was there he wasn't there because I think he was at work, but I can still be around his family and do that kind of stuff, which is cool even better, even better.
Speaker 1:Have you, uh, have you checked out the new don story yet? The don don no coyote, whatever it's called capolei capolei.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I saw the line.
Speaker 1:No, I didn't oh girl, let me tell you, I went yesterday, uh, with my wife because she wanted to meet with her friends. I wasn't all into it because I know about the line we went. I had a pretty cool time. I tell you it's, it's, it's an asian wally world and target it's like donkey hot day I've never been in the one yeah so my very first time in there, I mean the food selection awesome, I'm not gonna front.
Speaker 1:I hated the people. Well, you know, I know, I just hated how crowded it was. Crowded, it was super crowded. Maybe it's because it was opening day, but yeah, it'd be like that. Yeah, I'm like dog. Isn't there one like in town or somewhere around the island?
Speaker 2:So I think it's the. It used to be Don Quixote. And then they changed. They just rebranded oh, it's the. It used to be don quixote, and then they changed.
Speaker 1:They just rebranded. Oh really, it's pretty much don quixote. Okay it's, it's cool and everything I liked it. Uh, when I go back, definitely will go back. My fucking camera went off, but it's okay. I got an extra battery, um, but I'm gonna keep on talking because this is going, so we're good. Uh, should I change it? No see, I don't know, but that one's still going, that's cool you want to fix it. Oh, for real, I'm chilling. Okay, cool, cool, cool, we're going to fix it.
Speaker 2:Intermission, intermission, intermission. We're still talking. I got some shit to say. Can I talk my shit now? Who said that?
Speaker 1:Was that now? Who said that was that drake? I don't even know, all right, so you probably hear me. Uh, guys, I mean girls that are like trying, have they tried hitting your boy up?
Speaker 2:that I know of no. But what I really like about him is like he is a social media ghost, like I have how many followers? Like a lot, and he has all of like 200, like he just be doing his own thing. I love that. I love a guy who nobody knows, so I don't gotta worry about shit. So his secret admirers I have no idea who they are. He probably doesn't even know who they are Good.
Speaker 1:We're just talking about secret admirers, and her man doesn't have any.
Speaker 2:That I know of.
Speaker 1:That you know of. But if he did have a secret admirer, I mean you're taken, or he wouldn't even know, though, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I guess that's the point of a secret admirer, yeah.
Speaker 1:Do you have any secret admirers? I don't know. Has anyone Let me ask you this has anyone confessed that they?
Speaker 2:Anu, I'm feeling you, oh my gosh, do you want to read the craziest DM I got?
Speaker 1:I get to read it.
Speaker 2:You get to read it. It's in the request and I thought it was crazy.
Speaker 1:And I get to comment on that. You can Do. I get to read it out loud. Yeah, you can Do. You know this person.
Speaker 2:No, how do you? But, like just read it.
Speaker 1:You can read it out loud Wow, this is fucking long no, but read it.
Speaker 2:It's crazy.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm going to read it. Okay, I don't know you and never met you, but I think I honestly fell in love.
Speaker 2:Hold met you, but I think I honestly fell in love. Okay, let's just analyze that part. I don't know you, I've never met you, but I think I fell in love.
Speaker 1:I see it as a what is it, love at first sight type shit in this dying age, that's, that's, that's not gonna happen, it's nah, make, it make sense. The math isn't mathing, okay okay, fell in love with you after seeing that post. When you called someone and told them you love them, did you post something that?
Speaker 2:yeah, so I like called a group of my friends and like because I feel like people in hawai, hawaii don't do this enough where we tell each other like it literally was, like oh, I'm proud of you, I love you, like.
Speaker 1:I do that too, yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't do that. My friends don't do that. So, like I thought it was going to be a hee, hee, ha, ha thing, and people are going to be like Anu, I do appreciate that. That's what I would have thought If somebody called me and they're like hey girl, like I just wanted to tell you I love you, like, randomly, out of the blue, I'd be like Are you okay? Oh so like here in Hawaii, we don't do that, like we don't. We don't do the Random check in calls.
Speaker 1:Like so Surprising you.
Speaker 2:Yes, really, and coming from me, I don't be telling nobody I love them. They know it through my actions, yeah, so I thought that they were going to trip out, but my friend was just like they broke down. Some of my friends were crying on the phone and they were like I had a hard day and so I posted it and shit went viral.
Speaker 1:Really.
Speaker 2:Yes, and everybody in Hawaii were like this needs to happen more and I'm like I agree, but anyways.
Speaker 1:We'll talk about that. Yeah, we'll talk about that, and you're proud of them. That was so touching. It gave me tears. That was so awesome.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Period. You're so beautiful and I bet you're way more beautiful on the inside and I wish you were my gf. Look, let me tell you, guy, she's cool and all that which I don't got layers. After talking to her, she's been on the pod like what? Two times, two, three times already. This motherfucker got layers. All right, let's see. Uh, here we go. And girlfriend boy, please you ready to stop? Oh, I honestly will pray to God for you.
Speaker 2:Okay, that's okay Cool.
Speaker 1:In fact, I can't do that. I-d-e-k. I don't even know, okay, okay, I don't even know. If you're taken, which I doubt. You're single, okay, you're right there. She is not single there, buddy, but you are the most beautiful woman in the world. I feel that way and I promise that. Compliments, kudos, compliments. Okay, I never told any woman that in my life, but you only. Wait, hold on the grammar's, not grammar-ing right. I never told any woman that in my life, but you only. I've said to other women they're one of the most beautiful, but not the most. And you are it. Look, I am reading this verbatim. It's not me, I put it on my daddy, it is not me. So, um, this person has 3.4k followers. That shit probably slipped out of his mouth once or three times. You know, oh, my gosh, because I mean, I've been on this earth like I don't know a couple odd years now. I've said beautiful to you know several women not just one, I'm the most you're the most he's never said that before Anybody.
Speaker 1:Red flag Red flag.
Speaker 2:Red flag. Why the fuck you lying, yeah, why you always lying All right, last sentence.
Speaker 1:Hope you at least made you smile. Wait, hope you at least made you smile. Thank you for being so beautiful. I aloha, you, okay, break that down. Aloha, that's another. Love Okay, love Hope. And you, okay, break that down. Aloha, that's another love. Oh okay, love hope. And then he spelled lease, as in like I'm leasing a car, I'm hey, dude, I'm sorry uh you're about to unfollow me. After this, unfollow you he's probably gonna look for me like hey, you that fucker, and I'm like no dude I'm not that fucker.
Speaker 2:He's gonna message me and be like you know they take it back. You're not the most beautiful, yeah but you know what?
Speaker 1:we're not saying his name out. So hey, dude um wear it. Lace, that bitch up um, from a guy it's real heartfelt, right. Um, I think he's. You know he's coming from a good place one. Um, I think he's trying to play that game.
Speaker 2:I think what threw me off was the I don't know you and never met you, but I think I honestly fell in love with you.
Speaker 1:Did that post go viral? Is that how?
Speaker 2:So on Instagram as1 comments and it was shared 3,000 times.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah. So that's pretty much. Why Is anyone able to do that? Fall in love with someone that posted, let's say, a thing like that. Can that happen? I mean, it happened to him. But I'm not laughing at you, dude, I'm sorry. It's just my we're laughing with you.
Speaker 2:Yeah yeah, we're laughing with you, yeah.
Speaker 1:Is that possible? Like falling for someone that you've never met. Can that happen? I mean you, you gotta know at least something about like oh, she likes turtles, he likes rainbows, something about him that you could fall in love with, but never not meeting someone. That's like me falling in love with cindy crawford that I've never met in my life right or that's like you met, you falling in love with jason momoa because he's a great actor, but you don't know him I don't think that like that's love, if that's what it it's an infatuation, yeah yeah, like it, it's definitely not love sorry, brother you're
Speaker 1:not in love with me yeah, you're not, but hey, feel free to uh, feel free to share her posts, get her there like comment subscribe right, um, if I ever get this on live, like if we ever do this, if I ever get this podcast live, like, say, in alamuana, I'm definitely gonna have you on and get your secret admirers there. But hey, I'm that guy. And then I, I swear to god, I'd laugh, I laugh my ass off. If that ever happened. Oh my gosh, okay. Next question why did you get 86 from the Big D? And I don't even know what that means 86? 86, yeah.
Speaker 2:You can't enter an establishment.
Speaker 1:Like you're done, oh, and what's the Big D District District A club? Yeah, okay. Punishment like oh, you're done, oh yeah, and what's the big d district district a club? Yeah, okay, this is a story. How did that happen were?
Speaker 2:you just too drunk or you fought someone. No, I was not. I actually wasn't drunk at all, like we went to lucky strike before we went to the club I know that place very last minute decision. Uh-huh, some of my friend group went to district and since we were at alamo, it's in alamuana district is in alamuana yeah, okay, um like in that side, not in the mall, but it's connected to the mall like yes, yes so they were like oh, just come down to district, you guys are already there.
Speaker 2:Like I wasn't even dressed to go to the club, like I was wearing shorts and just a t-shirt. I wasn't even dressed to go to the club, I was wearing shorts and just a t-shirt, lucky strike type stuff. So we weren't even drinking. We went to district. A girl was pressing one of my guy friends, like will you buy me a drink, take a shot with me, or whatever? And my friend was like no, I'm not interested. And instead of just taking that and leaving him alone, she got in his face and was like what do you mean? And so, like me being the only girl in the group, I was like sissy said he's good. Like I wasn't trying to be rude, but, girl, he's good.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And she didn't like that. So she she called me out to fight. We were inside of the club and I was like girl get out of here Like I'm not about to body slam your ass, yeah, middle of a club. So when me and my this was actually like the first time I went out with my man- what, what a date right? No, so that's even more of a green flag. Like he saw me crash out and he didn't, like he didn't just ghost me, oh okay, yeah okay, yeah, did he try and stop?
Speaker 1:Oh, you know what? Continue, continue.
Speaker 2:So we went outside because, like, the mood was killed, Like me and a handful of my other friends who saw what happened, we all went outside just to chill because the fuck was that? And as we're standing outside, the girl and her friend group walk out and then it was just out from there.
Speaker 1:We got into a little squabble, squabble up, squabbled it up um on your post. Was that when you had like that little thing on your head? Yes, okay, I saw I saw that shit.
Speaker 2:She hit my head with her phone like the corner of her phone, and then I had to walk her like a dog oh, goofy head ass. Yeah, I got 86 from district.
Speaker 1:Never again you could return.
Speaker 2:I don't know. I haven't asked, I haven't tried to go back Because it was embarrassing. You know what I mean. Like you don't go out trying to start any problems.
Speaker 1:Yeah, this is true, yeah.
Speaker 2:But I'm also not one to get punked out. Yeah, you got something else coming. If you're going to try to punked out, yeah you got something else coming if you're gonna try to punk me out, because I'm not the one. Two or three right, we're pulling those layers, the layers, the layers.
Speaker 1:Why, um, why do you think that that female got so offended, when you're like yo, sis?
Speaker 2:no, and like the thing was like I wasn't even trying to be rude, which is why I think when it did come to the squabble and when she did hit me in the face with her phone, like I was just like you know what, like I genuinely was not trying to start nothing with you, I just wanted to let you know, because my guy friends are mean, like they'll tell you nicely the first time, like oh, I'm not interested.
Speaker 2:The second time they're going to be like look, you're fucking ugly. That's why I don't want to drink with you. Get out of my face, was she ugly?
Speaker 1:oh, yes, girl, I got pictures somewhere.
Speaker 2:But I literally pull those up and I'll let you know, like I literally. Well, it's gonna be the video. We just have to zoom in on her face oh, okay, okay okay, but um no, yeah, I was just trying to prevent anything from happening, because my guy friends will very they're not going to like hit a girl, but they're going to be like get the fuck out of my face and so I just was honestly trying to prevent that. So when she got all crazy, I was like I'm trying to help you out.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Backstory, though that's not my first interaction with her, which I think is crazy.
Speaker 1:So were you guys friends or are you guys no?
Speaker 2:So after the squabble I recognized her from one of my friend's birthday parties. She was outside of the club with her friend group and we were sitting down on the sidewalk and some random guy came up to her outside and like trying to get her to go home with him oh, maybe.
Speaker 1:Maybe she was like she was boosted right wait hold up I think I know her hold on you're fucking lying she was white she looked white. Is it um? Is her thingies fake?
Speaker 2:I don't know.
Speaker 1:Does she look like a clown?
Speaker 2:She kind of I mean she acts like a clown.
Speaker 1:Okay, she's Okay, she Does. She have like tats on her other side. Let me, see I don't know, on her left arm Is she like way more tatted?
Speaker 2:No, I don't think so.
Speaker 1:Is her man? Japanese slash black.
Speaker 2:Do you know if she has a man? I don't know if she has a man, because she was trying to get a drink with my friend.
Speaker 1:Um, okay.
Speaker 2:There was a black man with her.
Speaker 1:Did he have braids?
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:I want to say someone, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:I have a better picture of her face. You know what?
Speaker 1:We're going to compare pictures. Pause, guys. I think I know who it is, but I want to make sure it is you smell me?
Speaker 2:I don't think so. She don't have tattoos.
Speaker 1:Okay, good, good, good, good good, because See how sad her face is yeah, that's after you get your shit rocked. Yeah, she got no back, she got a little fupa lupa.
Speaker 2:Oh, titties were out, ass were out and they weren't mine.
Speaker 1:Ew, Ew. She ain't even that cute y'all.
Speaker 2:But anyways, that's why I got 86. I was trying to help one of my guy friends out. It turned into a squabble but it all worked out. Because that was the first time I went out with my boyfriend, I got 86 from the club. So now there's not even a discussion Like oh, can I have a girls night at district, because I can't go.
Speaker 1:That's funny. I thought it was her. Oh, they look familiar. They do right, it's the white, it's the curly hair. No, this girl looks a lot prettier than her, though okay like yeah, no, that's not her so funny thing is is that, um, this particular person she works with my wife and my wife works with a lot of uh it's not the one that got jumped. Huh no no, uh, but she works with a lot of um homosexuals.
Speaker 1:I don't want to okay, yeah, okay, and they said that she looks um don't even say it okay, I won't, but she looks like don't even say it yeah, okay, okay, because she gets, she got. She gets a lot of. Don't even say it, okay, no, but side note. She gets a lot of shit work't even say it, okay, no, but side note. She gets a lot of shit work done, but you know where I'm going.
Speaker 2:I know where you're going.
Speaker 1:Okay good, At least we're here.
Speaker 2:We're here.
Speaker 1:And I'm like, yeah, and she was like, oh, you like that, chris? And I'm like, oh no, I've never found her attractive like that, even when before she got the things done. I'm like, nah, man, that's like just not my type of female you know I mean I don't knock girls, who do?
Speaker 2:I mean, if you got the money?
Speaker 1:to do it do it girl.
Speaker 2:Like I wish I could Shit.
Speaker 1:How do you get money like that? Because I understand it's like expensive out here, it is expensive. Have you ever got anything done?
Speaker 2:No, I haven't Are. No, I haven't.
Speaker 1:Are you interested? I'm not trying to promote it or anything I had two kids.
Speaker 2:Yes, Give me my tummy tuck, Tummy tuck Again. Lift the tits please.
Speaker 1:Lift the tits. That's what you would get done, probably Just the tummy tuck and anything with the face like lips or, I guess, chin extract.
Speaker 2:I had that conversation with my boyfriend. What if I got lip fillers, just because I I don't know, I already have lips. But yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Just to have that conversation. What if?
Speaker 2:I got lip fillers. What would you do?
Speaker 1:And he's like Fuck on them.
Speaker 2:But no, he, yeah. No, I haven't thought about doing anything to my face, but because that just scares me, like I feel like you fuck up your face yeah, that's permanent.
Speaker 1:Yeah, girl, I would, um, if they ever did have like a knee growing thing where your bottom half. No, I'm not talking about like the dick in the balls, but I'm talking about like my knees about knee implants shut your ass. Is that real?
Speaker 2:I heard about it from white chicks my bad.
Speaker 1:Oh, I dropped the n word.
Speaker 2:Girl, that's a movie you don't remember that scene. When they're like oh my gosh, you got taller. And she's like is that is?
Speaker 1:that real though? No, okay, if it is like I would be like interested in that, but then my proportions would be totally off, like I'm, and then my arms are like short as hell. So what am I supposed to do? Right, Right. But I would definitely think of getting like being a little taller.
Speaker 2:My proportions are off. I have really long legs and then, like my, arms are no, my torso is short, oh so, like my upper butt, my, like my hips are long. Yeah, that's good for like running, though running in soccer I did hurdles in high school yeah so I mean, yeah, she's an athlete, y'all she athlete, yes, per um, let's go back to this.
Speaker 1:Uh 86, yeah, we still got time you got 86. Let's see, here we go. Why and I boys? Or why Manala boys? Why and I and what? Why and I why? What's the difference? Besides, one is on the east and why Manala is on the south?
Speaker 2:Why Manala is on the east and why Manala is on the west, why Manala is on the south, waimanalo is on the east and Waianae is on the west.
Speaker 1:Waianae is on the west Waianae. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Why is that?
Speaker 2:Honestly, like I've only Tiare, I hate you. I've only encountered with one Waimanalo boy like dated, and it just wasn't a good experience.
Speaker 1:Why not? It just didn't work out, okay, okay, it didn't work out uh-huh, but um, like he's a good, he's a good person he's a good person who did shitty things oh, okay yeah, but the shitty outweighed the good. Oh, the pros and cons list. Okay, yeah.
Speaker 2:But like I can't, like he had a rough life, so I kind of was like yes, I think it explains itself, but that's why I'm going to stay in Waianae, like I went to Waimanalo, just because everybody was like maybe you should try an East boy.
Speaker 1:Never again, never boy Never again, never again, never again. Huh, one and done, one and one and done. Um, I don't want to talk about any other boys because, yeah, I don't want your man thinking, oh, was he trying to hook you up with a North boy dated? You know what I'm gonna ask have you dated or like talked to someone from the north side and from what's the south side of the island? Um? Ever okay, sure, why not?
Speaker 2:yeah, I asked, so I did talk to a boy from wailua wailua is north, north okay um, he was talking to his ex-girlfriend the whole time, so that dropped? Yeah, dropped him yeah, um, I did talk to a boy from eva. He was cool, he was.
Speaker 1:He was a cool guy but, it just same thing didn't work out with all the guys that you've talked to um? Are they still friends with you? Do they still follow you on the gram?
Speaker 2:and vice versa yes that's good. Yeah, oh uh, they follow me I can block them if you want me, yeah right, you know what I mean uh-huh, but like it not like, like just getting to know them. Yeah, they still follow me that's good guys who? I actually dated. I think talking and dating are very different actually.
Speaker 1:No, it's kind of the same thing uh, okay, please, okay, please, uh, break that shit down, the talking and dating, because it isn't dating. In my, in my eyes, you're actually going out as a talking you go out, but it's it's a rare going out. You're just more of you know the texts or more the calls that's.
Speaker 2:That's kind of where I think I'm going with it. Like if you're talking to somebody, it's more so. Just like you said, not really going out dating, I feel like you're out there and you're actively going out getting to know, to know people. Like when I was single, I always said dating you can date multiple people. But I feel like some people don't like that. Like I can go on a date with a guy on monday and tuesday when I don't have my kids, I'm gonna go on a date with another guy on Monday and Tuesday when I don't have my kids.
Speaker 2:I'm going to go on a date with another guy? Yeah, because I'm just getting to know you guys. I'm not going to be exclusive to you unless you have that conversation with me. And then talking I think is maybe the early stages of dating, like you're having interest in somebody and then it turns into dating and then if you want that exclusive, whatever.
Speaker 1:Just mind your mind type stuff, yeah, and then then comes a relationship I think all of it is just communication of the steps let me ask you this um, dating, dating multiple people, right, if you're not like, say, laying it down on the first date, second date or third date, can you still date other people? So, per ejemplo, a guy and a girl they're, they go on a date, nothing happens at the end no kiss, no, nothing. They just hung out, have dinner. They do that two, three more times. Right, they see it nothing, nothing went down, nothing physical. He goes out with another person. Is he now considered a cheater in the woman's eyes because nothing went down or because they were dating those three times they went out together? Does that label him something different?
Speaker 2:well, like I said, you have to have that conversation conversation okay like. You can't get mad at somebody for acting a certain way if you don't set those boundaries with them.
Speaker 1:This is real.
Speaker 2:Or like if you don't just tell them like, hey, I'm not doing this, I don't want you doing this, if you do do it, then I don't see why I would date you anymore.
Speaker 2:Okay, you know it's all about communication, because they can't read your mind. I can't read your mind, like I didn't expect my boyfriend to be loyal to me from the jump, but he, that's just the kind of guy he was. So that made it so much easier. But I would have had that conversation with him like if you're gonna go out doing whatever you want to do, then I'm gonna go out do whatever I want to do. But I think that's where we lack nowadays is people don't know how to talk shit out oh and it's that easy, like it literally is like no, I'm just trying to fuck.
Speaker 2:Like okay, well, if that's what you want to do, that's not what I want to do, so keep it moving, find somebody else but there are females like that that are down just like that there's a lot that are down just like that. You just have to talk to them women are as bad as guys.
Speaker 1:They just keep it on the low down right 100, some females don't, and that's completely fine too.
Speaker 2:We listen and we don't judge over here yes, we do. This is your life, you only got one life, do what you want to do.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, I've been telling people that um like when, when people ask me hey, should I shoot my shot?
Speaker 2:I'm just like shoot it, just do it, shoot it just fucking do it, shoot it, just fucking do it. I mean, if it ends up in a divorce, it's fine.
Speaker 1:You know what it is. I can't. That's okay, Because at the end of divorce at least you know what you want. Like you have your limitations and your restrictions on what you want next.
Speaker 2:Shoot your shot. I am always an advocate for shoot your shot, because what's the worst they can do? Say no, okay. Well then, I'm going to keep it moving.
Speaker 1:Keep it moving.
Speaker 2:Shoot your shot.
Speaker 1:Ooh girl, yeah, always, always. Can I ask you this one thing? And then, before we dip out, when I messaged you the very first time right, wait, did I message you? No, no, nohea got you on. But then, after that time, when I asked you to come back on what made it easy for you to say yes and keep coming back, you replying to my shit, I mean it's always a good time it is right, it is. I have a good time with you all the time.
Speaker 2:When we had Nohea's podcast I didn't feel uncomfortable. It was cool and like. We exchanged social media so I could see all the stuff that you're posting, like I saw your family, your wife, like all of that stuff. So we friends, now we homies man.
Speaker 1:Hell yeah, that's what's up. Where can um? If they're not following you yet, where can these people find you at?
Speaker 2:On Instagram. He gon' tag me.
Speaker 1:I am, I actually am yeah.
Speaker 2:And then I'm on TikTok, your.
Speaker 1:TikTok is going Pretty good.
Speaker 2:TikTok be poppin'. I've seen that shit.
Speaker 1:TikTok be poppin'. It is your shit's funny. I am a funny person. It's funny. It's a dry sense of humor Type shit, but people can relate to it.
Speaker 2:He said dry sense of humor, it is dry.
Speaker 1:It is, I'm not going to lie, it's dry, because you're just talking and I'm like, oh shit, I could totally relate, and that's what makes it so funny.
Speaker 2:I think I don't even try to be funny. Sometimes I just genuinely I'm bored and I just gotta say some shit, Right, exactly. And then other people are like, yeah, this shit's funny, but I just be myself and people like that.
Speaker 1:That's good.
Speaker 2:Some people don't, but that's okay. You can't make everybody happy.
Speaker 1:Right, right Be genuine.
Speaker 2:Be yourself.
Speaker 1:Be yourself, be genuine. They teach you that All this fake shit don't like it, don't like it Mm-mm.
Speaker 2:Don't like it at all. Be yourself.
Speaker 1:Real eyes, real eyes, real eyes.
Speaker 2:Real Gs move in silence like lasagna.
Speaker 1:I got that. I actually, because the G is silent, Mm-mm-mm. With that being said, KS Studios. Thank you for the lovely home. Rafi Bayi, thank you for the lovely beats man. I'm Chris, I'm Anu and we out this bitch Peace.
Speaker 2:Did you hear me loud and clear?
Speaker 1:Yeah, you did yeah.
