Did you know that it is 110% possible to heal your relationship with food and become an intuitive eater EVEN IF you've been struggling with food & your body for 10, 20...or even 30+ years?
I know that when dieting and disordered eating has been part of your life for so long, it can feel impossible to even imagine a different way to live.
And that's exactly how Krista, Food Freedom Academy member, felt at 55 years old after struggling with multiple eating disorders, overeating, emotional eating and food restrictions for over 36 years.
Krista grew up in diet culture, constantly seeing people in her family dieting. And she's here to show you that there IS hope.
In this episode, you'll learn:
This episode is a testament to resilience. Whether you're seeking healing in your relationship with food or needing motivation to believe in transformation, this episode will leave you with a new perspective and invaluable insights.
RESOURCES
Connect with Sabrina:
Did you know that it is 110% possible to heal your relationship with food and become an intuitive eater EVEN IF you've been struggling with food & your body for 10, 20...or even 30+ years?
I know that when dieting and disordered eating has been part of your life for so long, it can feel impossible to even imagine a different way to live.
And that's exactly how Krista, Food Freedom Academy member, felt at 55 years old after struggling with multiple eating disorders, overeating, emotional eating and food restrictions for over 36 years.
Krista grew up in diet culture, constantly seeing people in her family dieting. And she's here to show you that there IS hope.
In this episode, you'll learn:
This episode is a testament to resilience. Whether you're seeking healing in your relationship with food or needing motivation to believe in transformation, this episode will leave you with a new perspective and invaluable insights.
RESOURCES
Connect with Sabrina:
How does it feel to be in this new chapter of your life, now Freeing?
Speaker 2:Freeing and just overwhelmingly beautiful. It's really a sacred time for me right now in so many ways, including this part, which has kind of been my faithful companion for a few decades and so it's like I'm just building this new, healthier relationship with myself.
Speaker 1:Today's episode is for you If you have been dieting for the majority of your life, because you're hearing from someone who grew up with a mom who was always on a diet, who has struggled through multiple eating disorders, including bulimia and anorexia, as a young girl, got treatment for it and still struggled with her relationship with food. She actually has been struggling since she was 19 years old and 36 years later she found the Food Freedom Academy. She found intuitive eating and she went on a journey to really begin the healing process. And you're going to hear her story, the things that she learned, the fears that she had to face, including the fear of not trusting herself, and so much more. This conversation almost brought me to tears. It was so incredible to see the transformation that she has created in her life and how it has impacted different areas of her life, like starting her business and letting go of a job that was no longer serving her, finding the confidence and the love and the kindness in herself and, as you heard in the little intro, building a better relationship with herself, and you can even hear it in her voice. So, without further ado, I want to introduce you to Krista Food Freedom Academy alumni and her story. Some of the highlights of our conversation include why going on this intuitive eating journey was different from any of the things that she had tried in the past. One of the most important tools that she learned throughout the academy, throughout her journey, that helped her truly break free from her old mindsets. The role of our nervous system and what she did, this practical exercise, this practice that she did to calm down her nervous system when she felt this urge to go back to her old ways, her old restrictive habits. The biggest breakthrough that she got throughout the program, and so much more. If you're looking to be inspired, to be motivated, to have some hope, then you definitely want to listen to this episode, so let's play that recording.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Live, unrestricted podcast, a show where you'll learn how to heal your relationship with food and your body so that you can focus your time and energy on more important things like your personal growth. I'm your host, sabrina Magna, food freedom coach, and my mission is to help make your life happier and healthier, without stress, overwhelm or guilt about food. If you love the show, please do go out and share it, and if you're looking for support with your relationship with food, details about my programs are in the show notes. Thanks for spending time with me today. Now let's jump in. Can you share a little bit about where you were, cause you signed up for the Intuitive Eating Challenge in the spring. I think that's how we got in contact, and what was your mindset, what was your lifestyle like? Where were you before you joined this challenge?
Speaker 2:I think I was in definitely a transitional space and I was really grateful for the opportunity to come back to myself.
Speaker 2:That's really what I see intuitive eating as is returning to myself and just aligning better with myself, and so it was such a great opportunity to learn some new things because I do do this work. I do mental health and addictions counseling, but it's so interesting that you know healer, heal by self. That really fit for me with the Intuitive Eating Challenge. So it brought to light just how far I had kind of gotten away from myself and helped me get back in tune with myself with the tools that you taught. I think the first and most important was around the diet culture and just becoming aware of the things that I was surrounding myself, even with the people that I surround myself with, and it's not that I'm going to cut out every person, but really learning how to and this was more through the actual course part learning how to assert myself and honor my beliefs with regards to Intuitive Eating, versus what society and some of my friends really believe about eating.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that's one thing that everyone really recognizes when they go through the program is how prevalent diet culture really is and its influence on people really on a subconscious level. And you mentioned coming back to yourself. So before the challenge, did you have a history of dieting or like a constant pursuit of weight loss?
Speaker 2:Absolutely. Yep, I grew up in a home that had my mom was on constant diets and then there was always issues, you know, in the family with a little bit of extra weight. With my dad and my brother I developed a full blown eating disorder in my 20s, ended up going to treatment in the States for bulimia and anorexia and then from there just really kind of held my own in terms of staying away from some of the bulimia kind of pieces but still not eating intuitively. There was lots of rules. Yeah, I think, just coming back to myself has happened definitely really since I think December, when I moved out to my home area, right in the forest in the woods, yeah, and so your timing of that seven day challenge was perfect, because I was in a bit of a groove and needed to start looking at returning to myself and some different ways of nourishing myself, and the timing was perfect.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and what was your relationship like before you joined the program?
Speaker 2:I think, very unconscious, not listening to my body, not even tuning into what I needed, overeating a lot emotional eating, and just there was a lot of shame and guilt around how I was nourishing myself and treating myself. And I really consider our body to be a temple and I was really just putting a bunch of garbage in my temple a lot of times and then expecting it to respond and have the motivation and energy that I needed to do things I wanted to and it didn't.
Speaker 1:So yeah, and then there was a lot of guilt and shame wrapped up into eating. Yeah, and did you? Did you know that there was something problematic with your relationship with food? Did you have that sense of awareness?
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and had you done anything to work on it before? Had you heard of intuitive eating before?
Speaker 2:I started following a woman on Instagram Probably two years ago. Her name was Colleen, and I can't remember what her last name is Christensen. Yes, gentle nutrition and her humor in just taking a look at eating and how we fuel our bodies and listening to our bodies and honoring what it needs and having room for everything and then being conscious while you're eating, though. So, yeah, definitely had. There was little seeds planted all along for the past couple of years.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and as you did the challenge and you really got immersed into what intuitive actually is, because a lot of people, like we, hear a lot about intuitive eating, there are some misconceptions that is, just eat whatever you want, whenever you want, and did you have any resistance, any fear at the thought of going that route and having that approach?
Speaker 2:Absolutely yeah, not trusting in myself to be able to listen within, to know what I need and what I don't need. There was a lot of. There was a definite lack of trust within myself. So, yeah, that was absolutely there. There was lots of fear and, because I love to look at life as just learning, in lessons and teachings and growth I was able to, I was in a space to be able to try and be curious and experiment with some things, yeah, and beyond, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that's one big piece is people have so much fear and resistance and we don't want to try. Because we don't want to fail, because if we fail we make it mean something about us. If I fail and as you know, now there's no failing and intuitive eating but if I make mistakes or if I have hard days, or if I stumble, or if I'm not perfect, then that means that this is never going to work for me and I can't do this. And intuitive eating is in right for me, right Like we make it mean so much more. And we don't just do that with food, we do that with so many goals that we go after I'm so afraid of it not working out or failing, because that will mean that I'm broken and that I'm never going to be able to heal. Exactly when you had those fears, what would you say were, like your top three fears that you had?
Speaker 2:Not being able to learn the or go on the journey of trusting, truly trusting myself and letting go of the old ways of doing things. I think that would be my biggest fear that I would be judged. Judgment is a huge piece for me of what are others going to think, because I am currently in a bigger body. Yeah, it's an interesting process and I think the other fear would be is that I would just, I think, balloon into something. I just do exactly what you said people think into what a beating is, and just eat and eat and whatever I want, whenever I want, and it's the process is much more sensitive than that and that's not how it turned out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I read something, the second piece, which was that fear of judgment. I think that that's one big piece that that dieters have. When you reside in a larger body is you almost feel like you need to explain to people and you need to apologize to people for the way that your body is, by saying, but I'm dieting to fix this right, like to justify I am, I might be in a body that makes you uncomfortable right now, but I'm making myself miserable and I'm punishing myself through a diet to try to fix this Right. Is that kind of how you felt? Absolutely Spot on, yes, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, even with all of this fear, what did you have to do in terms of talking to yourself, in terms of calming? Because we talk a lot about the nervous system and when all of those fears and those limiting beliefs come up, it's because we're presented with something new, something some of us have never done before, something uncertain, and our nervous system does not like uncertainty, especially if it's something we've never done before. But even if it's something that is going to be good for us, it's going to improve the quality of our life. So what did you have to do to kind of calm down your nervous system. In those moments when you started freaking out and maybe you wanted to go back to some of your old ways, go back into your comfort zone, how did you calm and soothe yourself?
Speaker 2:One of the biggest learnings for me. I took a trauma course a year before this one and it's the elongated outbreath is my biggest tool. So it's, whatever I breathe in, I breathe out twice as long. So if I breathe in for four, I breathe out for eight, and now I'm so. I do it so intuitively that I will wake up in the night and if I've had like a bad sleep or a little bit of a nightmare, I'm automatically doing that, and so it's. It's just such a gift. I think journaling, writing, watching the podcast pieces surrounding myself with really good support in terms of either reaching out like when we were in group, reaching out to the group online, reaching out to yourself, reaching out to my friends and talking to them about what's going on and also pushing through.
Speaker 2:There was a lot of moments. I remember one in particular. I was on vacation at a house that I used to live in and I'd eaten a lot of potato chips and I had eaten some. I can't even remember what all I ate, but I was at the hunger fullness level that was above what I'm comfortable at and I just felt such shame and I remember posting about it and the support that came and that just brought such peace for me and just that, that gentleness and kindness that came from others I was able to bring back to myself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that the, the kindness, the compassion and the gentleness that you mentioned was a really big theme for you as you went through the program. What would you say were some of the most valuable things that you got after going through the academy?
Speaker 2:Oh, there's just so many things. I have a new respect, thank you, for how my body works, how my brain, body, mind, body, spirit works really and just that, listening to myself and honoring what I need. I can slow myself down now. So if things get really, if I get anxious and I see the patterns in myself of when I will emotionally overeat, and so I'm able to do those breathing, the journaling, go for a walk with my dog, reach out to a friend, give myself some nutrition and check in.
Speaker 2:Those are all new things for me, that having some nutrition and then checking in, I would just go, I would just eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, and then I'd be at like a seven or eight on that hunger fullness scale and be like, oh, I ate too much. Now I can check in, I can stop.
Speaker 1:I can just slow it all down. Yeah, yeah, and I know that emotional eating was another piece that learning how to manage your emotions. So what was your relationship with emotional eating before and what is it like now?
Speaker 2:I think, because I'm in such I mean there was, I remember one particular phone call where a lot of my emotion was coming from a very valid place of stress from work, and so making a decision actually after that phone call to actually retire, start to build my own career, do my own thing, just listening to my emotions and being curious about them and validating them and trying to see other options for myself. The other thing that I learned through all of this is the flexibility of just being able to hear myself and say, okay, so like I'm angry or I'm mad, and just working with that, versus stuffing it down, because I'm not someone that tends to put my emotions out there. I'm more of a person that will stuff them inside, which is a definite connect to the emotional over eating piece. So, yeah, my emotions are welcomed.
Speaker 2:I actually had this conversation with a friend the other night because I have had a lot of grief this year as well, and grief is one that, to self-sude, I think I would use a lot of eating pieces. And now I sit with this grief and it's and he describes it as beautiful and nourishing and welcomed, and it's like huh, and I listened to myself. Then I have some tears. I do what I need to do bubble baths, all that sort of stuff. So more in tune with my emotions, for sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and can you remind me how long you struggled with food and your body for?
Speaker 2:Really full on from when I was probably about 19 and I'm 55.
Speaker 1:Wow, and with that long of a struggle, did you ever believe that you would be able to get to this point?
Speaker 2:I think at times, yes, more consistently. Now definitely yes, but lots of times no. I thought this is gonna be the thing for me forever, and I'm kind of in my last third of my life, so it's like, really, how many more chapters of this am I gonna do?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and how does it feel to be in this new chapter of your life now?
Speaker 2:Freeing and just overwhelmingly beautiful. It's really a sacred time for me right now in so many ways, including this part, which has kind of been my faithful companion for a few decades and so it's like I'm just building this new, healthier relationship with myself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and how do you feel like that's impacted those kind of like auxiliary parts of your life, your relationships with people, your career?
Speaker 2:I think I bring a lot more to my clients for certain, and a lot more to my friends. I'm now really more into quality versus quantity, and so when I have interactions with people, there's and it can be fun and lighthearted, of course, but also there's a depth and I'm bringing my genuine, authentic self to the table, not the part of me that's trying to be something that I'm not. Yeah, much more comfortable in my body, in my space, in myself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and kind of as a last piece, is for anyone who is where you were a couple of months ago and has a lot of fear, or just knows that there is a lot of healing that needs to be done on the relationship with food, with their bodies, with themselves, and who is considering taking those next steps. What would you say to those people? Are you worth?
Speaker 2:it. It's one step at a time, sometimes really small steps at a time. It's definitely a journey. The support is right there if we reach for it right, if we have the courage to reach out for it. I just think the material, combined with the support and your authenticity, sabrina, is a key to that, because you bring so much to the table with regards to your life and how you live your life and what goes on for you in a day, all of those pieces. It's well worth the investment, the time, the energy.
Speaker 2:I was just telling my friends the other day that the word that keeps coming to my mind right now is contentment, and I was looking back at the emotional guidance scale and I was really kind of in the I can't remember what the term is. I think it's the kind of the more the negative. I wrote it down the downward spiral, and every week I felt like it was in this downward spiral and then, when I was just looking back over the last couple of days, it's like contentment and positivity and peacefulness. What was the other word? Optimism? That's where I'm sitting now, naturally, and that is priceless. There's just nothing more important to me than that.
Speaker 2:So it's scary, but it's worth it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you can hear it in your voice. There's just a sense of ease and of peace and really contentment is like the perfect word to describe the kind of energy that you bring into the world now. Krista, thank you so much for sharing your story for anyone who is struggling and feels hopeless and feels like I think that I'm going to struggle with this first. I'm going to struggle with this forever, bringing these stories of people who felt the same way, who had a lifetime of dieting under their belt, who had the same fears. So helpful to see that you're not alone and there is a better future ahead of you if you're willing to believe in yourself. Exactly. Yeah, so true. Krista, thank you so much. I hope you enjoy the hell out of your house, of your dog, of your retirement, of your new business. There is so much ahead of you and thank you so much for coming on here. I hope you have an amazing weekend.
Speaker 2:Thanks, sabrina.
Speaker 1:Bye, krista Bye.
Speaker 2:Bye.