Important questions to ask) Third Date Conversations: Values, Faith, and Life Direction

By the third date, the conversation should shift from curiosity to clarity. In this episode, A'laila Carroll guides you into the deeper discussions that truly define relationship potential—your values, your faith, and your vision for life.
This is where alignment begins to matter more than attraction. What do they believe in? How do they handle life’s challenges? Where are they going—and do their goals align with yours?
Alaila breaks down how to approach these meaningful conversations with confidence and authenticity, while also helping you recognize when someone’s lifestyle, mindset, or spiritual foundation may not match your own. You’ll learn how to listen beyond words, identify core differences early, and protect your peace by honoring what truly matters to you.
If you’re ready to date with purpose and build a relationship rooted in shared direction—not confusion—this episode will help you move forward with clarity, intention, and self-respect.

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Transcript

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Hey, so I hope you guys are enjoying these series that I have been creating for you guys. And season 10 to me is a bonus season because I've talked a lot about narcissism and how to avoid that and what to look for and all those things, but I felt the need to give you something that can guide you, and that's why I created season 10 for you guys. So we are more than halfway through the season, and we're at episode 11 now. And this title for this episode is Third Day Conversation, Values, Faith, and Life Direction. This episode moves you from basic character elevation, which was season 10. I mean episode 10, my bad, into long-term compatibility signs, signals that you can use and that you will know that your relationship is actually going to work out. So you can go ahead and go further into the relationship, which are essential before emotional attachment

Season Purpose And Dating Pace

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deepens. With all the things that I've taught you, and one of the things I've said throughout each episode leading to now is why I say don't have sex. Because if you have sex before you actually give your chip yourself a chance to get to know the person on a deeper level, you put yourself in risk at risk for heartbreak as well as allowing spirits to enter you, which clouts your duck your judgment and changes your way of your logic, your logical thinking, things that you would normally not do, you end up doing, or you excuse those. This is the reason for um me saying to you guys, do not have sex before you really get a chance to know the person, and I just want to give you yourself a chance to focus on yourself in the first three dates. You're focusing on yourself. Do I want to give myself to this person? Do I want to allow this person to enter into my life? Okay, welcome back to improving your thoughts by freeing yourself. I'm your host, Alayla Carroll. This season we've been learning how to date properly, not rushing relationships, not ignoring red flags, and not allowing charm to distract us from paying attention to character. In the last episode, we've talked about second date conversation that reveals character. Learning whether to I mean, well, learning whether a person takes responsibility for their life, rather they you know show emotional maturity, and how they treat others. That's what the second date was actually about. Now we're in the third date, and we're gonna talk about what to do on the third date, what to look forward to, and what to pay attention to. So today we're learning and we're going to move into the third date. So you have already given yourself a chance to get to know them in a different light. Now you say, Okay, I really like this person, but I'm not quite sure if this person is still the one that I should allow to be into my world like this. I mean, yeah, they look good, they attractive and funny and charismatic, and you know, all this charm and whatever they got going on, and even have a great job, and you know, that surface level situation. We're diving deeper, we're going into a place where most people don't find out until they have been with a person for six months to a year. Usually, around that six months of dating someone to a year, you end up finding out that this is not the person for you, and you wasted so much time, and not only did you waste the time, you start compromising. And one of the things that I like to say is what you compromise, you usually end up losing it anyway. So don't compromise your standards for yourself to not be alone or not wanting to start over, those types of things. So, this is the reason why you will be figuring out what you will find out at six months to 12 months. You will find this out by the third date, and that's within the less than six month period. Okay, so like I said,

Why The Third Date Matters

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we're going to make sure that by the third date, something important has usually happened around this time, it should give you an opportunity to see the person in a different way, they should be more comfortable. That's what I'm trying to say. Now you are starting to feel a little more comfortable as well. You don't have yourself guarded as much. You might even feel stronger attraction for each other. You might even be thinking to yourself, this person could actually be someone I could keep seeing. Well, and that's exactly why the third date matters. Because when emotions begin to grow, it becomes even more important to ask the right questions. The third date is where conversations begin to shift towards personal values, faith, or belief system, life direction, as well as future priorities. These topics help determine whether two people are truly compatible beyond attraction. So today we will be talking about the purpose of the third date, conversations about values and beliefs, decision. You're gonna we're gonna talk about discussing life direction and ambitions, and we're going to talk about observing alignment or conflict. Okay, so this is what we're gonna talk about in this episode. So let's begin. What is the purpose of the third date? The third date is where many relationships begin to transition from casual curiosity to intentional evolution. Yeah, this is when you normally would want to lay down and have sex, you know, like okay, well, we had already gotten that past this and past that. But I tell you to hold off on it, give yourself a chance to see deeper with your mind and not with your body, and not with your emotions. See, you've already learned a few things on the first date. You explored personality and comfort. Are you comfortable with this person? On the second date, you explored character and accountability. Now, the third date begins exploring compatibility of life direction, yeah, because you might find out that you are better off just being friends and not in a relationship with each other. So here are here's something many people overlook. You can see something in a person, and you can say, I really like this person, but you can also see something else and overlook it, and only because you are allowing your emotions and your attraction for that person to lead you. You can like someone, you can enjoy their personality, you can even admire their character. But if you and if your value and their value do not line up, I'm telling you, it's gonna be a struggle. Yes, it is. Your values and life goals are completely different. If it's completely different, your relationship is going to struggle long term. It is, for example, one person wants to travel the world and live freely, and you know there's a lot of people out there like that, but the other wants to settle down quickly and build a structured family life, and there are plenty of people like that as well. You might be one of them, but neither goal is wrong, neither one of them is wrong, they both are great, but they might not be compatible with each other. Let me explain. So, I'll watch in the show Love and Hip Hop Alana. I told you I like watching my reality shows, I get a lot of information from them. So, this supermodel who used to be a model, she also was dating Nick Cannon. Now she's not, so her name is Jessica. She got pregnant by this guy that she barely even knew. And she had been seeing him and secretly seeing him, matter of fact, no one knew about him. And now that she's pregnant, she's showing this. Is what she's showing on the show now. I don't know what's really going on behind closed doors, but what I do see is what she shows. And what she had been showing was that she's been struggling to carry her babies. She had miscarriaged every last one of the babies she had. I think she said she was pregnant like uh miscarriage 13 times or something like that. I'm not sure, but I know she said it was a lot. In this pregnancy, she finally getting the chance to carry this child longer than she has carried the other ones. And problem is that the guy that

Using Values Questions To Learn Fast

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she's pregnant by, he is established and he lives in a different place than her. And she's been at his house most of the time, and now she's ready to go back home, but she's also ready to go travel like she's been doing. She's a free bird, that's what she is. She's more to me like an eagle, one that flies alone. And he's more to me like crows. I'm not saying that he's bottom, but I'm saying he flies in the flock because his family and everyone showed up at a dinner that they had to talk with her and celebrate her pregnancy, and they all had their own opinion about this baby. One of them, I think it was his mother, said, This is my baby. So she's already claiming the baby to be hers. So it's almost like she's saying, I'm gonna have this baby all the time. You're not gonna really have this child as much as you think you are. This is my baby. And I know there are some parents out there that are like that who would take their first grandbaby and actually be in their life way more than the parents are, and I'm not saying anything wrong with that. It's just I noticed when she said it, I immediately said to myself, Wow, Jessica's not that kind of person. This is gonna be kind of hard for her because she really wanted this baby, and now she gotta share this child with his family in such a way that it's gonna tie her down to where she's not gonna be able to do the thing that she wants to do. And what she ended up mentioning is later on after I thought about that, she mentioned it at the dinner when her friend Bam Bambi had showed up to see her for the first time as being pregnant. She didn't know that she was pregnant, and she mentioned she said to the boyfriend that she wants to travel. She was like, I'm gonna be going to LA and I'm gonna be going to Paris. Ned Man's eyes lit up to the point where he was so surprised and he was not liking what he was hearing that he pulled her to the side and he told her, Do you think I'm gonna follow you around everywhere you go? No. So, what are you trying to say? I'm gonna be a weekend dad, I'm only gonna be to see this child every now and then. That's not what I sign up for. So, immediately at that point, when I heard that, I started thinking, This is the reason why people need to get to know each other before they make lifelong decisions. You're putting yourself and that child and other people in a place where trouble can begin, and it could have all been avoided if you would have just taken your time. So take your time, okay? Just take your time, don't rush the relationship. Most relationships that work out and that grows, they usually work out because it wasn't forced, because it was naturally put together. So try to just let things naturally go together, enjoy each other's company in the moment, but don't overdo to where you're forcing something to happen, okay? And it is not as easy as it seems, but if you practice, it'll get better. So the third date is where you begin learning whether your path are moving in similar directions, and that is what I was the point I was making about Jessica and her newfound life with her baby daddy. So let's keep it moving. Let's talk about conversations about personal values because you are going to have these conversations with your date at this point. He's still and she's still your date. There, you there, y'all are still dating. Okay, you're not in a relationship, you haven't made it official yet. You're still trying to figure it out. So, one of the most important things to discuss by the third date is values. Values influence how many people make decisions, they shape how someone treats others, handles responsibility, and approaches relationships. A natural way to explore values is through thoughtful questions. For example, you might ask, what principles guide you? What principle guide your life the most? Like, what are those principles? See, for me, what principle guides my life the most is that I live to please God, like I want Him to be proud of me, so when I pass away, I can hear Him say, Well done, my good and faithful servant. So that means I have to read the scriptures and I have to know what He expects of me. Now I know I'm not gonna be perfect, I'm gonna make mistakes, and that's the reason why Christ came so I can repent and I can continue to ask for forgiveness and keep moving on with my life. But you want to know you want to know what principles your potential mate has because they might have something that is completely different. Like some people may talk about honesty, faith, family, integrity, or even personal growth. Their answer the answers reveal what they prioritize. You might also ask, who influenced your values the most growing up? So for me, my mother was the one that influenced my values the most because she was always on me about the choices that I was making, constantly on me. And matter of fact, one of the things she was always saying is, You're different, you can't do what most people do. I never understood that until I got grown. But I used to be like, Why, why am I so different? Why I can't do what someone else did. And she wasn't the only one that said that to me. I had a teacher that said the same thing to me. I was trying to do something that another girl was doing, and she was like, the teacher was like, actually it was two teachers. And during this time, during school, they was allowed to pop us, give us palins. And before I was finna get my pops, I heard the teacher say, I can't believe that she did that because it's not like her. She's not like all the other students. Why would she even do that? And what it was was that I stole some candy from the teacher's desk, and I did that because the girl who was with me, who she also stole candy too, she was the one that kept telling me to get some. And she kept saying, get some, get some. And I ended up taking some, and then I got caught. She got caught too, but for some reason I had got the most punishment than she did. And I was thinking, like, why? Why me? Why you punish me? And she didn't get like the type of trouble that I got. You didn't you didn't paddle her, but you paddled me. And I remember trying, I was in the first grade at this time, and I remember trying to figure out why I got paddled and not her. And you know, I thank God that I did get the paddling because I didn't do it again. Now her, she ended up in prison, she ended up stabbing someone as we got grown. And matter of fact, she she cut one girl up so bad to where, yeah, that girl's hand have never been the same again because she cut her hand, and then she cut another girl up. That's she went to prison for that. So I had to think about now. I see why they say I'm not like her or the certain people that's like her, because it was just not something that I was capable of doing that was in my life, so you have to definitely understand what people's values are, okay, and who influenced them as him, as her, who influenced you. The question often leads to meaningful conversations about family upbringing, like I just finished explaining. It also leads to mentors who, if they have a mentor or not, and also lead to life lessons because hey, I did learn a life lesson from that. I'm like, oh no, I don't want to go to prison, I don't want to be living that kind of life, you know. So pay attention not only to their answers, but to the depths of reflection. How are they even responding to what they're telling you? Do they feel like they actually learned something? Do they feel connected to the person that they're talking about, or do they feel like they really do regret doing whatever it was that they was doing that they probably shouldn't have done, or do they feel like proud of the fact that they're able to have some type of value to help guide them through their life? People who have thought deeply about their values often show greater self awareness. Another helpful question you might want to ask them is what does respect mean to you in a relationship? That is a good question. It is because. It helps you to know what you're going to be dealing with. Fellas, if you're dating a girl and you're unsure if she's actually going to satisfy you, you need to ask her. If you're big on respect, ask her that question. What does respect mean to you in a relationship? She should be able to answer it. If she don't have an answer or her answer is vague, you want to back up for a little while and pay more attention to her because you're gonna find yourself being in a place where you're not happy with the results that you're getting from her because respect is a very big deal for most men. Same for women too, because we don't want to be disrespected, so we want to know how you would treat us, and it ain't about disrespecting us with your mouth and the things you say, it also goes along with the things you do. So if their answer is acceptable, then that's good because their answer can reveal expectation around conversation, communication, as well as loyalty and boundaries that gives you the opportunity to know who you who you're going to be giving yourself to. So let's keep it moving. Let's talk about conversations about faith and belief. A lot of people try to bounce around this conversation. It's money as well as faith and belief. They usually don't get into the heart of it unless this person that you're dealing with is very connected to God or whoever they connected to spiritually, and then they just don't care and they bring it out. So if they're not really talking about it, you bring it up. For many people, faith or belief, your belief system plays a major role in how they live their lives. This is a part of your life that you're going to be dealing with because if you happen to not be a believer of Christ, and they are, that's gonna be a problem. It's a conflict of interest big time. It's really a conflict. You're gonna be bumping heads because my mother, she's a believer of Christ, and my dad, Muslim. They was married, and a lot of things didn't go too well with them. But the good thing about it, they

Faith And Belief Without Debates

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never made us pick a side. It was something that we just had a chance to understand and get to explore and figure it out. Hey, I'd I'd rather be this way or that way. That's what it was. But you got some families, some husbands, some wives, some fathers, some mothers. They're like, no, this is what my child is gonna be raised as, and that is it. You need to know these things because the third date can be a comfortable time to gently explore this topic. You don't need to debate beliefs. The goal is simply to understand each other. You might ask something like, Is spirituality or faith important in your life? If they say spirituality is important, you need to dive a little deeper. What kind of spirit are you talking about? Because there are many types of spirits. So are they talking about the Holy Spirit or are they talking about some other type of spirit? You have to find out. If they say faith, okay, your faith in who? Who you got your faith in? Is your faith in the Lord Christ, or is it in something else? You have to find out. Don't just go off of I'm very spiritual. Okay, what does that mean? Oh, I'm a faith-based believer, okay. You believe in what? You know, get into that conversation. Let's talk about it. Don't debate with them, don't disagree and start saying all kinds of stuff because that's gonna start an argument if you do if you disagree and you start really getting into a conversation that shouldn't go that far. Just listen and figure out to yourself when it's time to reflect, and you will reflect at the end of the date. Then you start thinking about is this what I really want to deal with? Can I deal with this? Are we equally yoked in this area? Now you can also ask this question too. Did you grow up with a particular belief that shaped you? And they probably say yeah, they might say no, you don't know. So this conversation can reveal moral perspective, it can also reveal culture traditions because hey, they might celebrate Christmas and you might not. You might not celebrate any holidays. You might be Jehovah's Witness. It's a lot of things you need to know. Because with me, I celebrate, but then there's things that I don't celebrate. So that's why you have to find all these things out. What is it that you do? Do you because you got some people who celebrate every single holiday that comes around? They don't care, they go all out. It'd be St. Patrick's Day, they putting out folded clovers and leprechauns and stuff in their yard. And then you got some people like, oh no, I don't believe in that stuff. I'm not doing that at all. But then you with someone who does, and you didn't get to a place to ask them these questions before you got serious with them. Now you're having a debate or a fight over something that should have been taken care of on the third date, somewhere around that time frame. So it also reveals long-term lifestyle. Yeah. Are we going to be able to be together? Can I accept this from you? For some people, sharing faith is extremely important in a relationship. That's why you have to find these questions out about your date. For others, respect for different matters more than anything. So some people they just want the respect and they don't care about what it is that you believe in. Others they they care about what you believe in, and it's like, hey, I thank you for respecting me, but I I have to put God first, and that's the way it is. So you have to figure out where you fit in in that, and where they fit in with you. So what matters most is honesty and openness. That is something that you want to make sure you're getting from the third date. Understanding these things early prevents misunderstandings later on. And remember, respect, respectful conversations about beliefs shows emotional maturity, gives you that opportunity to know if this person is mature or not. Alright, so let's continue. Conversations about life direction. Let's talk about that. Let's get into that. The third date is also a good time to explore life directions and future goals. You're not asking someone to map out their entire life. That's impossible and it's not even realistic. But you are learning whether your vision for life aligns. Okay, listen to what they're saying, don't just throw it off and be like, okay, whatever, because then later on it comes back up, and they tell you, do you remember I told you exactly what I wanted to do? Because you got some a lot of marriages go through this. The wife has goals and ambitions and dreams, and she's telling her put her future husband who's sitting in front of her or who's there with her, I want to go back to school, I want to get my doctoring degree, or I want to get my master's degree, or even get a degree, period, because they don't have one yet. And then the the future husband's like, okay, that's cool, that's nice, but I need I need to finish school first, and once I finish school, then you can go to school. Okay, he goes to school, he gets his degree, now it's her turn, but instead, something happened. What is that you say? What could be happening? What's that? Life. What's life? She has a baby. Now she's a mother, and it slows things down because she had to put her focus into this child as well as her husband, but she still haven't let go of her dreams and her ambitions. She still wants to go back to school. Then she comes back to her husband and she says, Hey, I would like to go back to school. And he's like,

Life Direction And Future Goals

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What? What you mean? We got this child, we can't afford school right now. And then she's like, Well, we can get financial aid, and he's like, But still, you how can you have the time? How would you have the time? We gotta take care of this our baby, we got a new baby. Won't you just be a mother? Just go to work and be a mother. Well, what happened in that situation? What happened was that he didn't really listen to her, that she was really serious when she said she wanted to go back to school. And that is where the problem lies. So you have to really discuss this question and these conversations and topics. You have to talk about it, and you have to make it clear to the person that could be your future husband or future wife. Hey, I have career ambitions and I am serious about finishing school. If I was to get pregnant and we have a child, it doesn't matter. I'm still gonna go to school. So you need to know that it's gonna happen. Accept it now, so it won't be a problem later. So when I'm ready to go back, you won't be trying to throw me off. Okay? So when you ask them that question about what kind of life are they hoping to build in the next few years, their answers may reveal goals such as the career, ambition, starting a family, personal growth, or even traveling and exploring the world. You know, just exploring things. It ain't about just traveling, but exploring new things and possibilities in life. Another helpful question that you could ask, here's another one. What motivates you the most in life? Now you get the opportunity to know how not only what excites them, but how to help them when they get depressed. Because you're gonna have these times when your mate is not gonna be happy or they're gonna feel sad. So for me, what I know that helps my husband when I see that he's in that mood where he's kind of getting depressed, what helps him is us going to a beach, and he gets to lay out and just relax. That brings excitement to him. And to me, I get excited too, and I love the water just as well as he does. That's how we end up connecting our first traveling trip. We went to Cancun, and it was such a wonderful time, and that's when I realized that this person here, I can literally see myself doing more of this with, and the date was awesome. I mean, was awesome because the reason why it was so awesome, because I can go on and on about it, but I'm gonna say this I didn't have to pay for nothing, he paid for everything, and I knew that he enjoyed my company the way he attended to my every need, and I was like, wow, he's really attentive. And I've already had met him before. We met in 2012, but yet to see that now we're dating and he's even better with me than before, yeah, that that's what I'm saying. So you want to find out what it is that motivates them because you want to use that motivation to help lift their spirits when they're down, unhappy, as well as depressed or anything to help break them out of that. Motivation reveals priorities, that's why you also want to know about what most of what m what can't get out what motivate them, okay. For example, someone motivated by purpose and growth may approach life differently than someone who's motivated primarily by statue or appearance. So that's not an easy thing when someone is only motivated by stature and appearance because that's too superficial, and you can't keep up with that, it's very hard to keep up with. But if a person is motivated by purpose and growth, then that's something you can work with because that's a goal to look forward to anyway. You should be trying to do that for yourself as well as they are, and you can grow together, all right. You should also ask another question. So I'm giving you questions to ask. Write these things down when you get the opportunity. The question that you also should ask is what does success look like to you? Success means different things to different people. For some, it means financial achievement. For others, it means balance, happiness, and contribution to others. So for me, it's all for those. Yes, balance, happiness, contribution to others, as well as financial achievement. Like I want all that helps me, and that's the way it would be. All right. So understanding how someone defines success helps you understand their life direction, where they're going at in life, it helps you to really figure them out pretty much. So now let's talk about watching for alignment and conflict because every relationship is going to have a conflict, you're gonna have a problem. So, how do you deal with this? As these conversations unfold, you are listening to for alignment. That's what you're doing, not perfection, no, but compatibility. Ask yourself Do our values complement each other? Do we respect each other's beliefs? Or our life go moving in similar direction? Are they parallel to each other and not crossing? Sometimes you may even notice small differences in each other's values, beliefs, and your goals. That's okay, that's normal. Matter of fact, you should. So here's another story I want to tell. I have this person that I know, and one of the things about her is that she doesn't really know herself, and I know this because I watch how she moves. She converts and she conforms to the person she's dating. So she's been dating this guy. I remember when she first started dating this guy, and she believed in Jesus as the son of God. I remember this was way before she met him. She believed in Jesus as the son of God. And I remember as time went on when she started dating this guy, she was slowly

Spotting Alignment And Avoiding Self-Erasure

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changing. She's changing the way she dressed, the way she some of the things she would talk about, how she would say certain things, and I'm like, she's a little off. What's going on with her? And she eventually told me that she was converting to Islam. And I was like, Whoa, okay, you told me that you believe in Christ as the son of God, but now you don't. And she even went to tell me um Jesus is just a man, he is just a person who is a prophet. And no, I don't believe he's the son of God. Like, wow, she went backwards. Like, seriously, she went so back to the point where I had to move back from her. Like, I need to slide myself on back before something happened. I don't want none of that what she got going on, rubbing off on me. But she converted herself to Islam for this man. She didn't do this for herself, she did it for him because she told me, she said, he wants me to be Muslim. And in order for him to marry me, I have to be Muslim. She's not the first girl that did this. I've noticed another girl I used to work with that used that done this too. And she ended up converting herself to Muslim. She was a Caucasian woman who was dating an Arabic man, and she decided to start wearing the hijabs and all that. That's how I knew about her. She started wearing the hijabs. I'm like, whoa, like you, you, you really changing. You covering completely up. And that's what she was doing. And I was like, wow, um, this is how you are. And what did it for me was her own mother said to her, she said, my daughter, she said, you would do anything for a man. And I was like, wow, you know, that's not a good thing because if this wasn't you before you met him, why are you doing this now? Because if y'all don't work out, what you gonna do next when you get with the next guy? And he said he's not Muslim, he's a believer of Christ. You're gonna go back to being a believer. That's not how that works, honey. You gotta make up your mind who who you are. So that's why I'm telling you to pay attention to the values and the belief system because you shouldn't have to change anything about yourself to be with someone, not when it comes to who you are at your core. Now, everything else would change as time goes on. So, for example, if honesty is extremely important to you, but the other person casually really don't care, they bend the truth here and there, that's a major difference that you have to pay attention to and decide uh I can't do this because I like honesty, and because you bend in the truth, that tells me that you're able to just do more. Compatibility, compatibility isn't about being perfect or identically aligned with each other to where y'all's personality is one. No, that's not it. It's about share foundation. Y'all can share the same plane, all right. So, how can two walk together unless they agree? All right, so now what do you do after the date is over with? You want to reflect. Refle after the third date is very important, just like the first and the second date. You want to reflect after the third date? Take time to reflect honestly with yourself. You're gonna ask yourself these questions. Do we share similar values? Do they feel the same? That you that's how you have to figure it out. Do they feel the same? Then you're gonna ask yourself this question Do we respect each other's belief? Because if you don't respect it, then how can you be together? Then you want to ask yourself, are our life goals compatible? Do you see yourself being able to do the same as what they are trying to do? And then the last question you want to ask yourself is Did the conversation feel open and genuine? And genuine genuine Yeah. Did it feel open and genuine? Dating wisely requires patience. And if you don't have patience, you want to start practicing it because this is how you're going to find the right person for you. This is how you're going to find your person. You don't need to rush emotional attachment. You simply continue observing, learning, and paying attention. All right. That's all you got to do. And be patient before opening up your legs and allowing all these extra emotions to take control. Alright. So the next episode, we'll be talking about fourth and the fifth date. We're going to put them together. We're going to talk about the fourth and fifth date conversation where this decisions and discussions

Reflecting After The Date

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begin exploring emotional maturity, communication style, and how someone handles conflict. See, communication style is very important because I have a problem talking to someone who's very aggressive when they talk. Even if they don't mean harm, it's just the tone and the pushiness that bothers me. So we're going to talk about communication style, how a person communicate. Also, a person can be very quiet and talk very soft, and so soft the way you can't hear them. And you're like, oh my goodness, why can't you speak up? So that is what we're talking about with communication style. Okay. So these conversations reveal whether someone is compatible of building a healthy long-term relationship. So thank you for joining me today on improving yourself by on improving your thoughts by freeing yourself, and you are improving yourself, you know. So I want you to remember attraction may bring people together, but shared values help relationships last. I'll see you in the next episode. Signing out, Alayla.